What options are the most painless ways of leaving?

[Anonymous No.29593368]

>mid 30's
>not enough to make it ever
>ngmi period
I see no point in continuing my existence, all I see here is wealthy people who feel the same way, why would I want to keep trying when the results would be the same even if i DID make it, which i wont.

[Anonymous No.29593469]

Gib crypto pls

[Anonymous No.29593479]

>>29593368
Buy some Rubic

[Anonymous No.29593537]

xmr->fentanyl

[Anonymous No.29593542]

>>29593368
my plan is drug addiction and i hope i fall asleep while ODing

[Anonymous No.29593547]

OD on fentanyl,

Order off the deep web if you can’t find it irl, I’ll bring doing that soon enough as well

WAGMI to death

[Anonymous No.29593605]

>>29593368
Watch eckhart tolle, Alan Watts and Rupert spira.

[Anonymous No.29593639]

find rich girl or boyfriend

[Anonymous No.29593661]

>>29593547
>>29593537
>>29593542
Jesus the amount of based is gonna cause me to overdose by proxy.

[Anonymous No.29593762]

>>29593368
How big is your capital? 3rd world? 1st world?

The big problem is the fact that you allowed this situation to happen. What have you been doing the last 10 years?

[Anonymous No.29593818]

I nearly died of hypothermia once, was literally minutes away from death.
It was a surreal experience, I knew I was about to die, but felt nothing towards it, felt peaceful.
It was actually one of the most clear and yet somehow obfuscated experiences ive ever had.
I kind of wish I could feel it again, but I dont really want to die.
At the end of the day, you can never win the game if you dont play it. You dont lose until you cash out.

[Anonymous No.29593847]

>>29593762
1. Cooming
2. Cooming
3. Cooming
4. Coom less
5. Even less cooming

[Anonymous No.29593881]

>>29593368
whatever you do, don't do

[Anonymous No.29594002]

>>29593762
Not enough to even justify writing it down, 1st world.

>>29593818
I've played the game for a long long time, tired now.

[Anonymous No.29594033]

I really unironically want to die too lol

[Anonymous No.29594094]

>>29593368
don't off yourself, idiot
> get rich or die trying
now shut the fuck up and go trying

[Anonymous No.29594178]

>>29594033
I legit want to, lotta people larp about it but usually really feel that way.

>>29594094
Die trying indeed.

[Anonymous No.29594398]

Ill be inevitably entering 6 figure hell soon yet i feel nothing has changed from being piss poor 2 years ago. I bought myself 30$ sneakers. Having money or spending it wont bring happiness. Its all so tiresome.

[Anonymous No.29594575]

>>29594398
literally just buy a motorcycle

[Anonymous No.29594581]

>>29594398
I'm not anywhere near there but just this last month I've gotten more than I has in my life, it's not a large amount but to me it was large, nothing no "Hey things are improving!"
Just empty showing the microcosm of even if I had enough to be content I'd probably feel the same way.

[Anonymous No.29594612]

>>29594002
You are 34, and clearly a retard.
I didnt find my feet till I was 30, im now 33, I became a handyman. Not exactly rich, but not exactly poor either.
I dont want your excuses anon, if you pull out like this, your legacy will be that of a pitiful loser. Doesn't matter what your rational is, how you frame it, or what excuses you make. You will be dead, no way to prove your detractors wrong, no way to defend yourself, no way to frame it, no more excuses to make.
Sort your life out bucko.

What is your situation right now? What country do you live in? What is your employment status, and what are your potentially monetizable skills?
We can help you to help yourself, but if you check out, then just fuck off and do it. No sympathy here.

[Anonymous No.29594903]

>>29594612
I appreciate the tough love I actually do because I know you type that from a place of care, my circumstances aren't worth explaining but to say the least I don't have the "ability" of the average person my age, I'd rather not get into deep detail just because you would pull back that statement at be at a loss.
But the sentiment is actually very wholesome and sweet.

[Anonymous No.29595573]

>>29594903
stop being a faggot, start being a man and fucking let other people help you. faggot

[Anonymous No.29595785]

>>29595573
Unless that anon is a doctor he cannot help me, but again I appreciate the sentiment.

[Anonymous No.29595895]

>>29594903
Thats ok anon. I was in a pretty dark place in my life too. Always felt lesser than others.
I grew up poor, never had the things other kids have, cheap clothes, broken home, no nice things, etc. It played on my mind for a long time, eventually I realized that I'm not like them, I could never fit in. I realized that I had an opportunity to chart my own path through life, to actually be unique.
Now I feel like a chad, im not, but I feel like one. I work with my hands, I say hello to people in the street, I have a family and am striving in life.
Constantly set back, losing money on crypto, a couple of unhappy customers, I got busted driving without insurance a few years back. But I never stopped striving. I just feel like im playing on ultra nightmare, and despite things being harder, I see my compatriots playing on "im too young to die" and getting further in life than me.
This is you, you are playing on ultra nightmare. But you can win.

Do you know what the turning point was for me?
When I became a handyman, however unprestigious or menial yopu may think that is, I became the captain of my own destiny. I was getting sunlight, lots of it, meeting new people and learning how to be charismatic, working manually. All of this increases your seratonin levels, this is what you are lacking. 100%. I dropped out of an architectural technology degree to pursue this and it was the best decision of my life, hands down.

You could work out, build something. I dunno.
Start by walking upright, with your chest out, work out to whatever degree you are able to. Start saying hi to familiar faces, no matter how difficult that is for you. You will notice an improvement.

[Anonymous No.29595995]

>>29593368
Join a mercenary army. Die in the glory of battle.

[Anonymous No.29596048]

>>29594903
Ok, please explain why you dont have the same ability as other people. We need an angle to work from. If you obfuscate the problem, we cannot figure out how to fix it.

[Anonymous No.29596307]

>>29595895
You're spot on and would normally be some of the same advice I give to people, I lived a very similar life to you and got on the high road only to be rugpulled by my health, the stuff I don't get into.

But that being said this man's statement is 100% factual to those experiencing dread and loss of hope and feeling, you get a lot out of exhausting yourself working with your hands talking with people and being outside, some of the best advice I've seen given here.

[Anonymous No.29596592]

>>29596048
I've explained it here before it's about a paragraph long and usually just causes most people to have a loss for words, I tend not to bring it up because it kills any genuine conversation but let's put it this way I got an expiration date.

[Anonymous No.29596746]

>>29596307
It takes having lived it to know it. Something I think you know too.
Sorry about your health anon. So what is the qrd? Are you physically impared? On borrowed time? Both? Mentally impared?

[Anonymous No.29596973]

>>29596592
Did you post the other night? I think I saw it baut cant remember what it was about.
How far away is your expiration date? Estimated? And is it a steady decline as it approaches? Like degenerative? Or a case of "dont know when its coming, but its getting closer for sure" ?

[Anonymous No.29597123]

>wee wee internet frens im sad and want to KYS
really anon?
is this supposed to be a cry for help?
A suicide note?
or a simple attention request?

[Anonymous No.29597255]

>>29596973
Probably did haha, only "larper" with consistency to his story, within 5 years, probably 1-3 more realistically.

It's a rapid decline, degenerative, neurological and wasting issues on top of just a mass of other shit lol

[Anonymous No.29597261]

>>29597123
Read the thread, hes fucked anyway it seems.

[Anonymous No.29597398]

>>29593639

This, life cheat code right here anon.

[Anonymous No.29597629]

>>29594002
Yaiks. Anyway, it's simple.
>go wageslave for a few years
>usually 10yrs if you are a brainlet
>5yrs if you are high IQ
>save it all
>invest in shitcoins
Guaranteed a 1mil by 35 and fully retired. Since you just starting now, you can achieve that by 40 or 45.

[Anonymous No.29597646]

>>29597123
*The true reason is I get sick of seeing these suicidal larpers over non-issues and my threads create a discourse that tends to be more genuine than those same threads, and I end up having good conversations with other anons*

That's the real reason it's a slap in the face to see so many demoralized and pathetically sad men walking around when I still find strength to get up and moving every day that I can, this is a horse to water thread nothing more, substance I find is more important than the topic at hand.

[Anonymous No.29598409]

>>29597255
Ahh fuck, then it seems to me like you will have to plan accordingly. Id love to see you live, but if you are going to die, id rather you did it in peace rather than torture.
I guess the thing for you to do, is to try to find beauty in the world, it is all around you. If you live in a city, get out. Hopefully you can move some place near friends, or family, but which has nature around it. And just enjoy nature until its your time.
When the wasting becomes too much, the ideal death is hypoxia.
Get a tent, and a bottle of nitrogen or argon, or some other inert welding gas (not co2, that will be torturous), tape the tent up so that you can effectively flush the oxygen out of it without pressurizing it. You will die in seconds, and wont even notice it happening. Notify authorities as you are climbing in, they wont be able to get to you before you die, and at least they wong arrive to a half decomposed corpse with maggots everywhere. Which also affords you an open casket if you desire.

Look at how people die in confined spaces in low oxygen environments, workplace accidents. This is the pinnacle of non suffering self euthanasia.
Until then, make the most of what you have left.

[Anonymous No.29598920]

>>29598409
I plan to make the most of my time and absolutely that's my agenda this year hopefully get enough pain medicine to halt the moments where I actually do want to eat a bullet, but this might be a horse to water thread but ultimately I will most likely end my life, I have no intention of being wheelchair bound and being one of those "It's a miracle he's 60 when he should have died at 35" stories no thanks.

But I don't want to leave a mess for anyone that finds me, that has negative energy around it in itself, I've thought about the tent idea and probably would be the way I do it, I don't condone suicide but in my state it's a much much nicer way of going rather than letting my body eat the function of my brain that allows me to breath.

[Anonymous No.29599836]

>>29593661
..taking the coward’s way out is based? I sincerely hope you find Jesus. Life isn’t about money. Money is simply a means to an end.

[Anonymous No.29599873]

>>29598920
Sometimes you have to play the hand that you are dealt. You will have to weigh up the negative energy of a peaceful suicide vs becoming a burden on the people around you, which will also ruin your legacy.
If you have friends and family, and I really hope you do. Then make some memories with them, leave a legacy that will live on. Did you make ny money here on crypto? If so, then now is the time to cash out. Use what you have to make a life for the next year.
If you have no money, thats ok too, nature is free, time is free. The tent idea I personally think is a stroke of genius, I can see that you have a similar mentality to myself (blowing both our trumpets here).
I guess all I want for you now is to die peacefully, when you are ready, and to look back and feel good about how you spent your last year or so.
I dont know if you dabble with weed much, but it might be something to consider, I quit years ago, and you shouldn't do it at the expense of wanting to make your finals days into good days. But its something that in moderation, could improve things a little.

[Anonymous No.29600159]

>>29593368
I think the most painless way is to leave through the door and make sure it doesn't hit you on the way out

[Anonymous No.29600259]

>>29597255
Hey dude have you heard of THE SNAKE DIET

[Anonymous No.29600286]

>>29593818
I was close to bleeding out once. I felt the same way

[Anonymous No.29600634]

>>29599836
Ultimately it's their choice who am I to take that away from them?
>>29599873
I do it helps ease some pain although the issues I have sometimes it doesn't do jack shit, but I'd probably been dead long ago without it, it's the only thing that gets my appetite going anymore.

I actually cashed out what little I had in about 4 days ago right before everything ate shit so I was wise there, nothing big but better I didn't lose it lol.
Friends and family are oddly so religious they just believe my issues are a lack of faith and even when I show them the diagnoses they just get quiet most people I find when you share a vivid truth such as myself turn away as fast as possible, people like the idea of a sad story or someone struggling but not the reality of a story that has a grim ending.

I told myself once my legs fully lose control or If I keep going into shock weekly instead of monthly I'll go ahead and cut my time short, I think the doctor's know I'm quickly terminal and aren't being truthful, they give me a lot of "we are still making sure nothing else is going on"

When I'm like a rusty car falling apart being driven without oil my engine is knocking pretty loud.

[Anonymous No.29601020]

>>29600259
"Snake meat huh?

[Anonymous No.29601776]

>>29600286
Thats weird anon, thanks for telling me. I find that shit kind of fascinating.
Is this what dmt is all about?
Theres something about reaching the point of seemingly no return that is extremely peaceful, its like the ultimate act of facing death head on.

[Anonymous No.29602232]

>>29593368
Look up the SN method
>Sodium Nitrite

[Anonymous No.29602549]

>>29600634
I'd imagine that them being highly religious is not easy to deal with. Probably best not to tell them when, or how you plan to go. Depending on what they are like, it might be worth telling them that you do plan to go out, that is your judgement though. It might help to explain to them that if they try so section you, or commit you or some shit, that they would just be robbing you of what precious little time you have left, and that despite their religious beleifs, you wish to spend that time making memories with them. Hopefully they can understand. Unless they are literal cultists, surely they will have to acknowledge that no amount of faith can save you. Tell them, its probably gods plan, and you wish to enjoy what time you have left. Maybe that you will end it before becoming a burden, but now when or how.
Some people cant let go, or face reality, that means they will think they are doing you a favour by stopping you, when actually they are running from the brutal realities of life.

[Anonymous No.29602929]

>>29602549
I've told my brother and he understands although he wants me to attempt to make sure I can't reverse or slow it down my multiple issues but as for my friends I tried telling them and they came back as a group (like a cult in a way their thinking is twisted from years of echo chambers) and responded with "What is your end goal?"

Stopped explaining right there, they tried pushing me out of the way when my father was dying of cancer to "heal him with prayer" when he requested to be left alone.

Didn't want them to really be around or "intervene" as they attempted before.

[Anonymous No.29603691]

>>29602929
They sound like total retards desu, unable to realise that if "god gives you cancer", no amount of prayer will save you.
Looks like you should spend time with your brother, and just try to enjoy the world around you. Hell, at least you wont be around to see it fall apart.
Even your retarded friends, they might be retards, but sounds like they care about you. It might be worth spending some time with them, just dont tell them you plan to go out on your own terms.
And explain to them that you dont want them praying for you, or otherwise ruining your time together, tell them some fairytale like " ive made peace with god, he has given me death, this is his plan, I accept it", or some shit.
They are probably just scared and feel powerless, but they may also try to take some kind of control to make themselves feel less scared, and this may take the guise of trying to help you. You have to work with that accordingly.

[Anonymous No.29604342]

>>29603691
And I am thankful I won't be around to see it wither, funny you mention that I have said something almost identical to that "I've had a good life but my cards were meant to end here, I believe I've done what I needed to do here with my time"

And I have I've done a lot of good for a lot of people, a decent amount of bad but haven't in a long time, I knew I'd die before 40 infact I had mentioned this to them when I was about 23, something in the back of my mind knew I would go young.

Unfortunately that same feeling told me I wouldn't make it to 34 and that's rapidly approaching, They all thought I was being cynical years ago and once I started showing signs I think the reality set in for them as well that I must have known something was off years ago and I did.

Funny I've got a picture of all of us together from 2006 happy and healthy, we all got together in 2019 and took the same picture, everyone looked almost the same but me, It's a little haunting to see it from my perspective because they have no idea but I look like I aged about 60 years in 13.

[Anonymous No.29604532]

>>29593368
Try to hold your breath till you suffocate.
Take a deep breath in and exhale as much as you can, really push it out till your diaphragm hurts, and then breathe in about 30% and hold. Hold for as long as you can and you'll feel your chemo receptors panicking as you die, yes this is what it feels like to die. Let go of that breath but don't gasp for air through your mouth, take a long slow full breath through your nose and back out again. Repeat a the whole process a few times and do this whenever you feel like killing yourself
This constant stress to your chemo receptors and lungs will force them to adapt to different oxygen/carbon rates making you less sensitive to wide mood and energy swings. Breathing through your nose will also strengthen the muscles in your nasal passages and the back of the throat rather than the front which will help with insomnia, sleep apnea, snoring and a bunch of other stuff. It will also allow your nostrils to regulate the chemicals in your brain as your nostrils stimulate each side independently according to our rate of breathing.
Get a dog, a pet or a garden. If a dog person, go for a HALT dog and learn how to raise and train your dog properly, invest in it and it really will be your best friend. Dogs demand little and all it's demands are to your benefit. (Exercise, physical contact, periodic relaxation in your day and a routine.)
If nothing works consider meds or EST or something. Get a brain scan first.
tl;dr hold your breath

[Anonymous No.29604713]

>>29604532
bunch of useless info

[Anonymous No.29604862]

>>29593479
This.

[Anonymous No.29605060]

>>29604342
what did you cook yourself today? when was the last time you worked out?

[Anonymous No.29605116]

>>29604532
Meditation yes is a very powerful tool for the mental health, infact you can use it correctly to disconnect your heart and I might end up doing that, I've practiced buddhism for years and the person I follow was able to do this, basically extreme meditation focusing on disconnect the valves of the heart until your brain finally shuts it off.

I do organic gardening, I'm not a huge dog fan myself but that's because I have many cats I spent my life raising animals and the last decade being a naturalist, it's the one thing I'm only waiting for is the weather to warm up so I can enjoy what time I have left I do enjoy talking with folk here as a way to pass the time and share moments of weakness and hope and strength because that's really all I can do with my remaining time, but as you can see I have two cats on my lap and 2 more wanting to jump on me, they tend to surround me at all times.

[Anonymous No.29605340]

>>29593368
Stop it right now anon. Don't kill yourself! I don't want you being eternally damned. Read the Holy Bible, I recommend starting from the New Testament. Jesus Christ who is God came to the world to save us from sin, from eternal damnation. He died on the cross, yet 3 days later He rose from the grave claiming victory over sin and death. Believe in Jesus Christ, gain everlasting life. I pray my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ helps thee overcome the darkness that swallows you whole. Don't kill yourself anon.

[Anonymous No.29605377]

>>29593368
I have said it before and I will say it again, think about a destination suicide.
Anywhere you have ever really wanted to visit? Do it, it could inspire you to go on, and if not you can end it all after fulfilling something you always wanted to do. Always wanted to visit Germany? Get a one way ticket and check it out, if you feel better great, if not end it there.

[Anonymous No.29605402]

>>29593368
>late 20s
>only $130k networth
>no gf
Yeah, sometimes it is better to just bite the bullet

[Anonymous No.29605827]

>>29605402
Girlfriends are easy to get, I'd explain in detail just how but I'm not feeling super healthy today and it would be drawn out, Basically stop wanting a girlfriend but put yourself out there tinder/bumble etc and stop expecting anything, try to fake being cool as long as possible and you'll attract someone.

[Anonymous No.29605892]

>>29602929
Do you you Huntington's

[Anonymous No.29606063]

>>29605827
>and you'll attract someone.
Not if you are an average looking guy, or even below average. I am a 6 or so, and I am a lost case. But yeah thanks for the advice. All I want is a loving gf. Don't even care about the rest anymore. But everybody only wants the perfect man.
Good luck OP

[Anonymous No.29606182]

>>29593368
All these faggots lie.
Everyone on this board is larping and broke.
Don't sweat it man. Just dca into a solid project and forget about it. ADA,Algo, XBT, take your pick but remember that all this shit is fake and it takes years of hodling

[Anonymous No.29606217]

>>29605116
Yeah i get that the mainstream hear breathing and think Buddhism and meditation but nobody really has time for that. Cut the rituals, the spiritual, the philosophy and all that other bullshit that's subject to opinion and require an alt lifestyle.
Breathing works, especially nasal breathing, and it's not just indians and asians who practiced it. The rosary should follow the perfect breath at 5.5 if done properly for example.
I couldn't care less about the spiritual side of it, i'm only interested in how it can help me control myself and emotions to focus more on what needs doing.

[Anonymous No.29606312]

>>29606063
I'm bald, got cancer and either ALS or MS and other shit mixed in there from the side effects of those conditions.

I'm not good looking, my teeth aren't great, my hairline looks like Bernie sanders, that mentality you have about being unattractive will make you unattractive, you need to be projecting that no other man is like you because of something you possess that they don't.

But don't let the woman know what it is you possess (For me it's my limited time but I don't share this unless we get serious)

[Anonymous No.29606430]

>>29599836
it takes balls to kill yourself you stupid faggot

[Anonymous No.29606533]

>>29594575
Listen to this guy.

[Anonymous No.29606646]

>>29606217
I practiced buddhism for my own sake but anyone can do breathing exercises, I've taught many people to use it as a tool to calm down extreme pain and also can put you to sleep faster than a sleeping pill.

I enjoy the spiritual side of mixing nature and meditation, the only time I can't meditate out of a bad mood or numb pain is when I'm going through shock it's just too overwhelming and I'll forget to breath but when I'm in a more natural state it's a fantastic tool, infact probably gonna do it today sometimes I forget about it.

[Anonymous No.29606781]

We're currently living in a dark age. The world is going to change big time, for the better. You won't want to miss it bro.

[Anonymous No.29606965]

>>29606063
I'm a fucking 6 and I'm able to get matches in a rural area. I have a job, dress well, and don't act like a fucking sperg. If you treat women as if you're interested, but also show you don't care if it doesn't work out, they're much more inclined to speak to you and want to spend time with you. I just treat everything super casual until it stops being casual.

[Anonymous No.29607130]

>>29593368
Pentobarbitol

[Anonymous No.29607202]

>>29593368
Inert gas, can someone please hook up the man with inert gas?

I personally have cyanide pills waiting me, but those cyanide is in case the fucking FEDs blame me for the funds I got rugpulled on. I cannot pay 26% on 300k usds.

[Anonymous No.29607286]

>>29606965
this

[Anonymous No.29607332]

>>29607202
That shit stresses me out just reading it, oof.

>>29606965
Yeah spot on, It doesn't take much infact I find average looking men have better luck.

[Anonymous No.29607334]

>>29593537
>>29593542
>>29593547
Is it more painless and 100% sure than cyanide? how much fentanyl you need per pound?

[Anonymous No.29607446]

>>29593368
There is more to life than money. If you truly don't believe this, I feel nothing but pity for you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1y24cKeQs0

[Anonymous No.29607596]

>>29607446
If you go back and read some I wrote, I know that but that being said I am watching the video.

[Anonymous No.29607975]

>>29607446
That was nice man, I probably needed to hear that.

[Anonymous No.29608055]

>>29593368
Go fuck yourself bro, come on. All this fucking crying over capital threads are way too symptomatic. You just need to stop consuming social media and watching fucking netflix and mass media shit. Just as you remarked, even folks that already "made it" are also fucking miserable because technology fucked up any sense of meaning in this world. When you die, you're not going to be a subject of your own life, so fuck it, you are virtually already dead. There are a shitload of subcultures that don't give a single fuck about society. You can get a plane right now and change the whole history of humanity if you want. Stop being a fucking pussy

[Anonymous No.29608092]

>>29607975
>>29607596
Having a rich inner life is more important than wealth.

Money is definitely important for security, but don't forget the big picture.

[Anonymous No.29608664]

>>29608092
It's hard but as I said before once the weather breaks I'm gonna get off the computer and back into nature.

[Anonymous No.29609325]

>>29607446
I was unhappy even before I was chasing money.
I hate having no connections, no talent, no happy chemicals running through my brain.

[Anonymous No.29609413]

>>29593368
Imagine how many people with thousands of BTC felt like that in 2012.

[Anonymous No.29609533]

>>29593368
why not try bugging out to the woods for a bit?

believe 1 cor 15:1-4 kjv

[Anonymous No.29609726]

>>29593818
I was in a similar situation but I felt the opposite. I have wanted to die for a long time now and even had a very nearly successful attempt at it but about three months ago I had an experience where I fell in a frozen river and had to walk for hours through a forest back to my car covered in ice and with no clothes. Despite my usual thoughts, I was really scared of dying there. I was thinking about it while I walked and it confused me.

[Anonymous No.29609826]

Please don't go, we'll miss you :(

[Anonymous No.29609891]

>>29609325
The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances.

[Anonymous No.29609913]

>>29593368
>Bro. Just... Take a deep breath. You are sad because you think you need money to be happy. Hell man, you don't even need to be happy to be content. Contentment, inner peace, that's way better than happiness. First thing you do is pray to teh God you don't believe in, and tell Him that you're at the end of your tether, and He better show up soon, just like Johnny Cash did in that cave he took himself in to commit suicide. Cool story btw, read that. After you pray to the God you don't believe in, because I mean, what have you got to lose, right? You go for a run. If you can get access to weights all the better. Don't off yourself brother, people care about you. Fuck, I care about you.

[Anonymous No.29609995]

>>29593368
Exit bag
You won't be able to thank me later.

[Anonymous No.29610150]

>>29606312
I will keep that in mind, fren. Thank you.
All I remember is, that a few years ago when I was travelling I was able to get laid. Not like a Chad every girl I wanted, but here and there an attractive one. Then I started my studies and everything went downhill. Rejection after rejection. I wasn't in the flow, because I was unhappy with what I did. Maybe that contributed to it as well. I don't know. But after a time I even hated myself for being so ugly and became very insecure. Also I got picked on in school for my looks when I was younger, so that didn't help neither. But yeah, at least I got laid. Last time was 4 years ago though. I plan on travelling again at the end of summer

[Anonymous No.29610360]

>>29593368
Feel sorry for you anon, you got dealt a fucking shit hand. Hope you enjoy the rest of the time you got left. Use it good man.

[Anonymous No.29610459]

>>29606965
>but also show you don't care if it doesn't work out, they're much more inclined to speak to you and want to spend time with you
Yeah I had that experience as well. But it just didn't lead to anything the past years. I was even considering plastic surgery at one point. Last time I didn't show any direct interest, I got a blowjob from some drunk girl and made out with some hot MILF.
But that was before Corona and both of them were drunk. I just want to have a normal fucking Date, lol. Oh well, maybe one day. Online game is shit for me as well.

[Anonymous No.29610469]

>>29610360
https://youtu.be/LUYBWuI5uXk

Here's a vid that always cheers me up.

[Anonymous No.29610724]

>>29593368
If you are legit terminal and want to go out on your own terms take a look at the European assisted death clinics. If I ever have to face that, this is my plan. Best of luck, anon.

[Anonymous No.29610739]

OP is a total piece of shit, and hopefully offs himself and stops posting here.

[Anonymous No.29610973]

>>29593368
Think carefully OP
I'm not gonna try and stop you, but think carefully before you do it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxGRhd_iWuE&ab_channel=Ryuujin131

[Anonymous No.29611461]

>>29595785
I have seen you post various times about your degenerative issues and so on, and I've seen you say you are tired of people recommending all their miracle cures anon, but I am going to do just that, as you have nothing to lose.
Please look into BPC-157, just Google it, it isn't that expensive and I really think you should consider it.

[Anonymous No.29611810]

>>29609826

If you don't live in the united states here is a list of other hotlines.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines

[Anonymous No.29612275]

READ THE KYBALION
THEN READ BUKOWSKI
THEN READ THE KYBALION AGAIN UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE HERE.

[Anonymous No.29613224]

>>29604342
Sorry anon, I was on a phone call.
Thats crazy to see though, I cant imagine what its like to witness yourself from such a perspective. Ive experienced a lot in my life, done a lot of good, done a lot of bad, watched people change.
Never had the opportunity to see myself as if I am somebody else like that though.
Must be surreal.

[Anonymous No.29613485]

>>29605116
I was telling my partner (not wife yet, despite 10 years and kids) about you, and she suggested gardening, funnily enough. Growing something like micro vegetables was her idea. You might be on borrowed time, but the idea of cultivating something is kind of poetic.
We have a garden, but also germinate stuff indoors on some shelves I made from plywood and threaded rod. See pic related

[Anonymous No.29613579]

>>29593368

[Anonymous No.29613712]

I’m glad anons have finally realized they can painlessly kill themselves with fent. No one deserves to have to kill themselves with crude methods

[Anonymous No.29613892]

>>29610459
You need to be in a place to meet somebody, it gets harder the older you get though.
Listen here though, there is a woman for everyone, even a retarded spastic mongoloid can get a woman (of a certain caliber of course).
Dont listen to the retarded incel logic here on 4chan, these people create walls around themselves and resent women for it.
Being a 6/10 means doesn't mean that nobody is interested in you, it just means that you cant pick up any roastie you want. There are plenty of 4, 5, 6 even 7 who would want you, and who you would find attractive.

[Anonymous No.29614073]

>>29609726
I guess we are not all the same. I hope that was a wake-up call to you though. You really dont want to die, and that means you still beleive in yourself and your ability to play the game.
The harder the game, the more satisfying life can be.

[Anonymous No.29614750]

>>29613485
Op here, was trying to find that picture and found some other ones of when I was heavy before I was wasting and kind of astonished, but absolutely gardening is my only real passion in life.

Some of the coneflowers I started from about 5 years ago now have spread out to about a 20 foot perennial bed just one of many I have around.

[Anonymous No.29614767]

>>29613892
>You need to be in a place to meet somebody, it gets harder the older you get though.
Yeah that makes sense anon. See I am working my day job in a rual area. My family owns land and stuff. So I am very fortunate in this regard, but I just don't meet any new people this way. That's why I want to travel again after I cash out some money from this bullrun. Apart from the fact that I really love it, it was always the best way for me to meet new women. I'm 27 now and while I still consider myself young, but I also realize that I maybe have only 7-8 years left, if I don't want to end up with a total roastie. Anyway, I'll see how it goes and try to stay optimistic. Got a few thousand LINK as well, so even relocating wouldn't be a problem in a few years. But first I have to find a good woman.
A few years ago a girl wanted to have a relationship with me, but that was across a long distance, so I told her this won't work out. Really lover her back then and if felt like we knew each other forever. That's the closest I have been to a gf. Was thinking about that a few times over the years, what would have happened if I just listened to my inner voice and gave it a try. But I let my head take over and that was always a mistake. I can only hope that the Gods present me with another such opportunity. I definitely won't let go of it a second time. But then again, I was 23 back then. That's a long time already

[Anonymous No.29616286]

pump

[Anonymous No.29616970]

I have polyostotic fibrous dysplasia and my legs have broken so many times they're permanently crossed. I'm in constant pain, can't get comfortable ever. My dad and his dad were alcoholic war veterans who shot themselves. I'm drinking now. Not gonna kill myself because continuing to live is my "fuck you" to the cycle of suicide in my family history. But goddamn am I hurting. Whether you exit or not anon, I'm glad I existed and that you existed and our experiences overlapped in this reality. Even if we all killed ourselves, I think it's still worth it to have lived

[Anonymous No.29616982]

>>29613485
Sorry for the long time in between I was looking at some pictures and debating even talking about this, it's easy to larp it's another to face death and talk about it, It's easy for me to talk to others about their experience but when I ultimately start shining the mirror upon myself I don't have as much control of my feelings as I'd portray to other people when they seek my advice.

This is a picture when I was heavy in my early 20's, I felt unhealthy then and I was but I assumed it was because of my weight, I rapidly starting dropping but thought it was me concentrating on becoming thinner but I didn't change my diet.

I was happy that I started losing weight but also noticed things like my teeth falling apart, and getting sicker and sicker, but I tried staying optimistic, then it got more and more rapid with signs I ignored like sweating the bed, infections swollen lymph nodes, but hey I was getting females attention now.

If you are heavy and don't change much about your life and notice a rapid change in your appearance or normal sleep and general feeling don't ignore it like I did for years.

I'm at the point now where my you can see all my bones like a concentration camp victim, I think I'm down to 170 maybe 165 I haven't checked lately.

[Anonymous No.29617090]

This is me not long ago maybe 5 months ago I've since lost even more, point if any out of this it don't ignore your body, you might have money but you can't keep your health if your time has come, so enjoy the time you have on this earth, I think I might go back to that park later this spring it's been awhile.

[Anonymous No.29617134]

I want to pray for you anon. Is there a chance to know your nickname or a name? Or give me even some imaginary name if you can so that I can use it in my prayers.

[Anonymous No.29617447]

>>29617134
Alexander will do, It's my middle name.
I do appreciate it, I don't reject god or prayer I just try to be realistic.

[Anonymous No.29618231]

>>29593368
Watch this shit now nigga
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gplA6pq9cOs

[Anonymous No.29618291]

>>29593368
Wait, all is not loss, wait for Pulse Pocket to launch and they can offer you medical help!

[Anonymous No.29618438]

>>29593368
Lmao dude just wait for the bullrun to blow over, accumulate during the bear market, and just cast your hands in iron to prevent any panic selling.

This market runs on cycles.

[Anonymous No.29618513]

>>29614750
Man those are pretty cool. I worked in a nursery for a bit (flower farm, not kids nursery) and found out I loved flowers too. Cant remember the names of half of them desu, but I do have a soft spot for dahlias. Something about the orderly patterns and deep colours is pretty beautiful.

[Anonymous No.29618789]

>>29593368
>these replies
please dont kill urself my bro
the fact ur on 4chan puts you in the 1% of chads on this planet.

[Anonymous No.29618853]

>>29618513
They are very pest resistent and hardy as hell, you can't kill them off so they will make a nice little garden every year with minimal work, echanashia is the proper term for the plant, they are related to sunflowers I absolutely love them I want more colors.

Plants is about the only thing that I get excited over even if I know my health is in the toilet it's something I helped create and even after I leave it will keep itself going.

And of course growing things for their natural color is always a wonderful little surprise.

[Anonymous No.29618916]

>>29614767
Thats ok dude, sorry for the long response, I was getting washed.
The thing about travelling is that it does introduce the issue of not being able to take things all that casually, but its definitely good for the soul no matter what.
Also, dont fret about the long distance thing, I did it once, was a big mistake, I am still friends with that girl, and loved her dearly. We have our own families now. But if I could go back, id be brave and cut it off, in the end all I did was hinder her having new experiences.
Still though, I was 18 at the time and was retarded.
I know this is getting to be boomer teir courting, but you might want to sign up to some kind of class, like an art class or something, yoga maybe. I know its pretty gay, but its a good casual environment and might be a place to start.

[Anonymous No.29619113]

>>29618916
Gardening itself is a good subject to learn most women don't have plants but love them, and something about a man gardening really gets most women going.

and most men do NOT garden it's rare.

[Anonymous No.29619614]

>>29618853
Was just reading through the thread and catching up.

>>29616982
Thats a nice photo man, its weird to look at now though, seems like a forshadowing, given

>>29617090

I can understand its difficult to bring up though, its one thing to put on bravado and shit, but at the end of the day, we are all scared of what comes after, deep down anyway. Its easy to imagine what it must feel like to be in your position, but literally impossible to actually grasp the real magnitude of it, and what it must be like to face up to it. You are a braver anon than I am.


>>29618853
Thats cool, are those purple tomatoes?
I can definitely see the value of gardening to be honest, I a way, its like leaving a little bit of yourself to live on. It has the quality of being precisely the opposite of what you are going through, which I can see why that would be appealing. Plus its just a nice pastime also.

[Anonymous No.29619760]

>>29593368
Do not suicide you coward.

[Anonymous No.29619791]

>>29619113
You know though, I know a handful of guys who are mega into flowers and gardening. And they are the roughest, hardiest guys you would ever meet. One is an ex fisherman, the other is an absolute womanizer and the other runs the nursery I worked at. All 3 used to get fucked up on drugs at the weekend and get into fights. Not unlike myself actually.
Funny that, who would have thought.

[Anonymous No.29619810]

>>29593368
Exit bag. Look it up.

[Anonymous No.29619933]

>>29619760
Read the thread man, hes not long for this earth anyway. But he still has some life left in him yet, this thread is just a comfy chat about mortality and life now.

[Anonymous No.29620030]

>>29619810
Nice, I went with the exact same method, but with a tent instead. A bag seems way more efficient.
Will keep that one in the old mental tool kit, just in case.

[Anonymous No.29620123]

i think an easy way out would be to slice the femural artery. bleed out, slowly fade into the great unknown. not much pain, except for the cut, can't be that bad, that's how i would do it.

[Anonymous No.29620214]

>>29593368
You are an incredibly well spoken lad and wise too. Keep on toasting here and I wish you nothing but good luck.
You must have heard all the miracle cures there are, maybe look into Rick Simpson oil, Reishi / ganoderma mushroom and artemisia annua tea.

[Anonymous No.29620276]

>>29595895
What exavtly do you donas a handyman? Are you living in the West? What is some blue collar job that requires high iq/ being smart?

[Anonymous No.29620368]

>>29619791
Believe me I wish I could party lol, if I do a couple shots now I'll start throwing up, I had to get oxy for my surgery last year and had to stop taking them I got so violently sick, which blows because they help.

I'm pretty content in my embracing of death but I get sad that the last 10 years of my life were a waste of time, and now that I'm happy about things and ready to enjoy life I can't even do that.

It's a torture because you see everyone who has probably a good amount of time left who don't enjoy it, when all you have is a little time left and you can't enjoy it.

I always told myself my struggles must be leading up to some amazing half of the rest of my life, inspiring myself after Rodney Dangerfield because he didn't get his shot at fame I think till his late 40's (Not that I want fame god no)

My illness has kept my situation perpetually shit, but my drive keeps pushing me to want to half a more comfortable existence, even though that is short.

It's a mindfuck honestly.

[Anonymous No.29620617]

>>29620214
Thank you, it's been getting worse because of neurological background issues, as you can see in some of my text I'll slip words into place that I didn't meant to write, or completely leave out a sentence that I intended to write but didn't.

The neurological issues I have stemming from either MS or ALS which it's hard to tell still in the diagnosing stage of that and my health insurance kicked back in so I gotta wait to go now but hopefully get some resolve on that or a medication that makes my eyes stop losing control.

That's the worst part is the motor functions are going haywire, I can deal with pain and wasting I can't deal with my muscles all acting like someones sending electricity throughout my body nonstop.

[Anonymous No.29620723]

>>29620276
I live in scotland, ive done a lot of things, some small, like fitting a sink and tap, some large like creating partition walls and building an en suite from scratch, with shower and toilet, etc.
You would be surprised at blue collar work, anything that requires problem solving, or venturing into unknown territory, on your own, requires at least a decent level of IQ to enure competence. Im sitting at around 140 (according to unreliable online tests anyway, im probably more like 130). I use my brain the most when dealing with moisture problems, as you have to simulate in your head, the many ways in which liquid water can move through a structure, and then also take into account the same thing again, but for gaseous water vapor, and then condensation. I can assure you this is not an easy task.
Another example would be a mechanic, for similar reasons.
Any job that requires problem solving and adaptive thinking, requires a decent IQ. Mind you, often a complete retard gets the job instead.

[Anonymous No.29621013]

>>29620723
Scottish yourself?
I know my family comes from the Picts, I always wanted to visit it someday.

[Anonymous No.29621217]

>>29620368
Fuck, life is an odd thing eh. You convince yourself that there is some deeper meaning and then random chance just comes along and rugpulls the shit out of you.
I'd think that the last 10 years were not a waste of time, you were planning for a life that isnt coming, an objectively smart thing to do given that you never knew. In this time, you grew as a person, and showed yourself that you could function as an independent and intelligent adult.
If you want to get totally reductionist about it, then what is the point of dying at 60 compare to 34? Its all equally pointless in some ways.
Of course, naturally, we dont think that way. But from a technical point of view, its all the same really.

[Anonymous No.29621580]

>>29621013
Might be worth a trip here if you can make it anon. Yeah, im scottish, born and bred. Its pretty nice here if you ignore the politics. Up north is pretty beautiful, aviemore in particular, its touristy, but off peak months its just very pleasant.
I'd tell you the town I live in, but I dont want to dox myself, its a small seaside town on the east coast though. Nowhere else id rather be.

[Anonymous No.29621646]

>>29621217
It is, In ways I can sit back and smirk at people losing millions because it matters very little to me, I could earn 10 million but I know in the back of my mind I probably wouldn't get past spending 100k before It's over.

and spending my entire life frugal that amount seems absurd, oddly enough I think most people would trade to be in my position because they could finally stop being alive.

Have I thought of suicide? of course like most people hell probably since I was 7 years old, will I do it, probably not like most people we all want to know what tomorrow might bring, what's going to be under the Christmas tree the next morning.

So as depressing as my story might be, it's also more freedom than most will ever get, some suggested I do illicit shit like it's an episode of breaking bad since I'm near the end but one I know how life works soon as I'd do something I'd get busted and somehow be a miracle survivor who rots in prison for 20 years.

I'm a peaceful man at heart, I want the last of my time to be stress free and no dramatics, that's all I really ask for.

[Anonymous No.29621729]

>>29617447
Sup dude, I was mid way through praying for you when I realised we have the same middle name. No killing yourself big fella. We're middle name brothers, that's a thing right? .. I've just been informed it's not. nvm

[Anonymous No.29621746]

>>29621580
I prayed for your independence and was very upset when it fell through, I was gonna renounce my citizenship and use my family history to join you all, If I get one chance to leave this country Scotland would be the place I'd go for sure.

[Anonymous No.29621952]

>>29621729
Sorry I just read your post above this one, somehow missed it and your right money only equates not having to spend my time acquiring it because that just eats away any remaining strength I've got, people want me to relax but they can see I'm always in a panic to find a way to make enough that I can stop and rest.

It's silly but yes I am trying to exercise more I got a bicycle that I'm riding because working out keeps the muscle wasting at bay slightly, I had to stop doing free weights though because my back would go out every single time and make me bedridden, was before I knew my muscles were wasting.

[Anonymous No.29622459]

>>29621646
Yeah man, I hear you. Some times the stress of running a business, scheduling jobs, keeping an employee around and on top of that, running a family and caring for my partner (who has arthritis and hypermobility at 30) is killer, and then on top of that, the stress of trying to make it on crypto. The sweet release of death does have a certain appeal. I used to get chronic migraines (actually cluster headaches, but nobody knows what those are), and while in my daily routine of 2 hours of extreme agony, I would think about what it would be like to have a shotgun, specifically a shotgun. I didnt want to die, but id think "I could just pull that trigger and instantly this pain would be gone, just like that" . I think my problem was a milk allergy, funnily enough.
I keep fighting the good fight though, the only thing that I fear, is croaking it before I have raised my family, or set them up for life. Otherwise, as the years roll on, the more comfortable I get with dying, and the random roll of the dice.
Having been so close to death once before helps though, in that moment I accepted it and welcomed it.

[Anonymous No.29622509]

>>29621952
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzRcjlKFABU A quick story, it's worth three minutes of your time, maybe. It resonates with me anyway. All of Cash's American series, all five albums, they're worth a listen too, he wrote knowing he would soon be dead, so he rushed them out. Best work he ever did.

[Anonymous No.29622568]

Oh also something I forgot to add to this and other threads I've spoken in, my chiropractor was the one who noticed something wrong with my CNS because I couldn't resist him with my legs and he immediately raised the red flag something was wrong at my size.

Chiropractor also figured out my dad had cancer lol, don't ignore those guys they seem to know shit.

[Anonymous No.29622618]

Helium bag

[Anonymous No.29622720]

>>29621746
I was upset too, this was my first foray into politics. I dont think we are really ready for indpendence yet though, we need to either create industry, or become a tax haven. I dont think our current government is competent enough to make that happen. Otherwise im all for it. Its kind of ridiculous that we are ruled by the english in the first place. We got sold out really.
And yeah, I do hate the english, cant fucking stand them honestly. True scotsman really.

[Anonymous No.29622794]

>>29620617
sounds horrible man. I really teuly wish you all the best! Maybe really chevk the 3 things I recommended.
I have often been told recently while battling my personal hell that our soul agreed to everything that happens to you before being born and that you can take it. Well if I did, I surely was fucking stupid.
For me one of the worst things is a seemingly non important thing most people get over. I have bad eyes, hate glasses and have no confidence in them, feel isolated, left eye is dry and often rejects a contact and I do not dare to risk lasik or similar.
Of course over the years layers and layers of shit stockpiled on this, but I believe apart from my very stressful birth this is the core problem of all my shit depression, anxiety, lack of self esteem, self confidence, self control, discipline.
A seemingly nuance problem. For eg I couldnt be in the military, go camping in the wild etc because of that, I feel I am heavily constrained in my life.

[Anonymous No.29622807]

>>29593368
If you're actually in that state I don't see why you wouldn't at least TRY and liquidate everything and gamble it all on high leverage bets.
I mean shit by sheer odds you have a 1/100 chance of making it. 2-3 doublings at that kind of leverage and you're in.
And if you fail, you just kill yourself anyways.

[Anonymous No.29622818]

>>29608092
>Having a rich inner life
how2richinnerlife

[Anonymous No.29622853]

>>29622568
Thats crazy, I dont think ive seen a chiropractor once in my entire life. Its not that common over here. We have free healthcare, but most of us never use it.

[Anonymous No.29622857]

>>29599836
>Calls someone a coward.
>Believes in supernatural nonsense because he's too stupid to cope with reality.

[Anonymous No.29622862]

>>29622459
Keep pushing man I'd trade all my experiences for my health back so I could go make better ones, Ultimately I strive to catchup for lost time so I could leave my family with a little something so they know I wasn't just a lazy piece of shit but I did want to help but my body fought me, I've had debilitating migraines since I was a kid having a low grade one today luckily they aren't as frequent or severe as they were when I was young but they are no laughing matter, I don't know if mine were cluster because I never had that diagnosed just knew they came randomly and made life miserable good to hear you figured out what was triggering those.

[Anonymous No.29622915]

>>29593368
take care of yourself dude. go have fun.
if you have nothing to lose, then you have everything to gain. it's rebirth OP. take advantage of it. nothing to weigh you down.
no need to end anything except your misery, which you can do by turning your life around.
don't do it. we are all going to make it.

[Anonymous No.29622932]

>>29593368
Move to Oregon. Establish doctor relationship immediately. Wait 5 years. While waiting meet a woman. Fall in love. Change your mind but if you still did it then the nurse lady will make it painless.

[Anonymous No.29623007]

>>29594398
buy Jordan 1's. black people seem really happy

[Anonymous No.29623018]

>>29620723
Man I love the Scots, brother went to St Andrews. Im from Hungary, our spirits are somewhat similar I find.
I have never been twught any practical skills by my loser father or grandfathers, loterally nothing, not even how to put up a tent.
How does one start learning about hand skills and practical stuff? I have no confidence in this area, feel like a retard taking 2x on an ikea furniture than probably is healthy.

[Anonymous No.29623113]

>>29622720
Same here I spent that decade pretty heavily in our political system and others, you might be right but I also know the Scottish people need to have the chance for freedom as they haven't been allowed even that.

>>29622853
Yeah I thought he was a kook till my entire system went haywire about a month after his visit.

[Anonymous No.29623238]

>>29593368
most painless way of leaving is living a pleasant life enjoying something you want. you like the guitar or anything man? music is incredibly therapeutic and playing it even moreso. there are tons of other instruments, some real wild ones too!

[Anonymous No.29623284]

>>29622862
I think we would all trade one thing for another anon, but yeah, if I were you id make the trade with practically anyone.
I dont think they will consider you a lazy peice of shit, it should be abundantly clear that your health was a major factor, if not, the major factor.
If you have nothing to leave them, then memories are what you have left to give them. Memories are priceless anon, money can be spent, but so can time. I think its obvious to you by now which is more valuable.

[Anonymous No.29623304]

Also guys do you have any tip for self control and discipline?
I use 4chinz for escapism but in general due to my anxiety and not liking my work or anything really in my life I end up staying late making my already fucked insomnia worse.
Any tip on how to force yourself to bed and putting down the phone?

[Anonymous No.29623684]

>>29623284
Oddly enough as we were talking my friend chimed in my discord to my friends "Name one good memory of our childhood"
And he's never someone who reminisces.

Life is odd I try not to wrap my head around it too much, Hopefully spring comes sooner than later the only thing I really want is just to be outside.

[Anonymous No.29623716]

>>29623018
All my life, I was the type of kid who would take stuff apart and accidentally break it. I wanted to know how things worked. Eventually I learned to fix things. I went to college to learn plumbing, engineering, CAD, computing, and dropped out each time. Finally studied architectural technology and did 2 years, then went to uni and did 3 out of 4 years and then dropped out to work at sea, catching lobsters, then worked at a shellfish packing plant.
My big break came from speaking to a guy. I used to pass this guy every day on the way to the shop, an electrician, I would say hi, and eventually got to telling him about laptops I was fixing and selling. He asked me if I could do a job patching some ethernet cables into a cupboard, I bought the tools and did it. Then I got a couple more jobs, and made business cards. They cards were not much help in finding more work, but what did get me work, was getting involved in community council type stuff, just speaking to people and putting myself out there. Now I have a lot of work.
Thats my story.
It might not fit you all that well, but it depends, what are you good at? What sets you apart from people you know? What do you often do for other people to help them out?

[Anonymous No.29623725]

>>29623304
Scheduling and berating yourself into sticking to it, but also don't overwhelm yourself with too much too fast. Dedicate rigid imposition to a specific activity at set times on a regular basis and do not deviate. Whenever you want to slack off remind yourself that if you do then you're giving future you permission to do the same thing and everything you've invested so far will be for nothing.

Eventually you'll be able to build up to the point you don't need it anymore.

[Anonymous No.29623803]

>>29593368
Take the whole thing and go workout

[Anonymous No.29623933]

>>29623113
This is true, although politics is something ive started to avoid. Its easy to stress yourself out about something you have no control over. I often frequent /pol/, but the last year its just become fear porn. I cant be bothered with the powerless feeling anymore. Jews gonna jew, whats new.


>>29623684
That shit is serendipitous, looks like the weather is starting to improve a little, days are getting a little longer. You might be in luck there.

[Anonymous No.29624156]

>>29623304
I would also like to know.
I have weird sleep issues, I get insomnia, sleep paralysis, central sleep apnea, narcolepsy and cataplxy. My dreams are like wild, hyper realistic movies, I can wake up and go back to sleep to resume dreaming.
Anyway, one day I had this weird dream, a voice told me to try the 11-7 challenge. Whatever that means. I think it was my body trying to tell me to force myself to bed at 11pm, and wake at 7am.
See:
>>29623725

Of course, its 2:23 am here in the uk, so I clearly failed.

[Anonymous No.29624611]

>>29624156
Lol I also have horribly vivid dreams although I haven't had one in years which I'm glad.

I had sleep paralysis one time and oh god was it freaky thank god it never happened again, but like a waking dream.

Try meditation if you can which is just breathing exercises I find when I can't sleep right it's able to shut my brain off, another way I find is if your brain is running nonstop try forcefully thinking of a memory that never happened, start creating a fantasy in your head and your brain will take over and you'll pass out.

>years of insomnia.
I found if I thought about events that had taken place my mind would stay awake, soon as I start thinking of bullshit it would fill in the void.

[Anonymous No.29624675]

>>29593818
>I kind of wish I could feel it again, but I dont really want to die.
k-hole

[Anonymous No.29625017]

>>29624675
Ive just looked into that, sounds interesting, its been years since ive experimented with drugs, and have no intention of trying again. But yeah, im glad to have had these types of experiences.

[Anonymous No.29625314]

I came into crypto in early 2018 with my $5k life savings right after it had begun to crash, thinking I had missed the boat since the 2017 bullrun was over and it just kept going down and further down.
But I kept treating crypto like a second job. I kept trying to learn the ropes of how the market actually works and how to effectively trade altcoins while reducing risk. And now I'm at 7 figures.

This market can take away everything you've got if you don't have the intelligence or motivation to properly work it. But there's also no limits to how much you can make if you put in the work and have a functioning brain.

[Anonymous No.29625348]

>>29624611
I have them so often that I dont even feel fear anymore. Most of them are centred around something, like lightning, a tornado, a bear or lion or dinosaur , or some sort of danger that is actively seeking me out, no matter where I go, and I am trying to save my family from it. I manage every time and its not that scary, more like a calm and collected, dealing with the situation as it unfolds type of scenario. Usually, ill get into a room with 2 doors, one is locked and the other I am trying to lock, then the other door inexplicably unlocks itself. Doors windows, etc. I think it means something, but I dunno.

The sleep apnea is the only one that actually bothers me. Waking up constantly in panic because I literally stopped breathing, its not that I cant breathe, its that I just dont. Thats the only thing that really irritates me.

As for thinking about shit that keeps me up, year that really is the problem. I find listening to this helps a lot though, and it helps with the apnea.
https://youtu.be/HA2LTXOUMzM

[Anonymous No.29625457]

>>29625314
Im at the 5k part of your story, except I lost it all and now had 40 bucks. I am taking the same approach as you, reading books and taking online classes. Its nice to hear your success story. It gives me hope.

[Anonymous No.29625464]

>>29625017
I'm the same way, zero interest in that if I was a young healthy man partying would be fine but that ship ages ago.

Plus I like having a sober mind I feel I'm able to experience life the way it was suppose to be.

[Anonymous No.29625509]

>>29593479
This anons. I was suicidal and then bought into rbc on an all in attempt around 1.5 cents. Next thing I know my portfolio showed 200k+ depending on the day. Cured my depression and have nothing but excitement now looking forward to the project updates. I have a great feeling and I will continue to hold until this green little cube makes me a millionaire.

[Anonymous No.29625566]

>>29625457
I lost half the money in the first few weeks of trading. Failing is how we learn. Just keep fucking grinding and at some point you'll begin to see returns.

[Anonymous No.29625704]

>>29625457
Damn that sucks I hope you are making enough income to stay ahead of the curve, believe me if I was a man of means we would change that, You're a good scottman and knowing I'd be helping a fellow kinsman would be heartwarming in itself, always had a soft spot for you folk.

Hopefully you'll find someone or something to get that number ratcheted up to a comfortable level where you can rest easier and enjoy time with your family.

[Anonymous No.29625832]

>>29625314
Thought you were a bot at first haha, But that's very possible as long as you got the time and patience which is hard for most people.

[Anonymous No.29626109]

>>29625464
This is how I feel about it too. I feel like I am fully in the real world, where I should be.

[Anonymous No.29626152]

>>29593368
That's a shit attitude
Can you work? Because if you can, work just to get some cash that you can invest in crypto. The games not over yet, you can still buy into any one of the newer coins for just about a hundred dollars and hold.

[Anonymous No.29626211]

>>29593368
Why do faggots think like this and not like I have nothing to lose so best try to do that one thing that I know will make me somewhat happier by any means necessary whatever it may fucking be considering that I have nothing left to lose because I am a suicide faggot

Literally bro you dont care so treat your life as if you’re in the matrix

Go make a fool of yourself in front of a cute girl / boy / thing. You do realise they ultimately don’t give a fuck what you look like or how much money you make right, you’re at least that red pilled?

Or really this shits just too hard for you and by too hard I mean there’s a wall in your brain that you submit to. No one needs to do anything extraordinary physically to make it. Really mate sort it out

[Anonymous No.29626213]

>>29607334.
you have to realize the death would be asphixiation. your lungs would literally be put on pause and you just wont make it. you will nod out and die basically in your nod. sometimes the person isnt dead though they go into a type of stasis. that is why narcan is a life saver literally. this is not how you wanna go out bro. i cant imagine whats going on in there, but not like this. when you drown in water your last breath is a inhale of water which then fills your lungs. quite painful. for opiates your lungs will lay dormant and eventually your dead not sure about the amt of time. you technically can be in this stasis state without breathing for a while im sire everyone is different bro. Always good to have narcan on you, you can get it at the pharmacy. please get help somebody needs you.

[Anonymous No.29626396]

>>29625566
I got mega lucky in the first couple of weeks, turned 450 into 25k. Lost it through a series of idiotic blunders within a week. But it taught me that I didnt have a midas touch, and now I am motivated to learn how to do it properly.


>>29625704
Thanks fren, thats ok though, I welcome the challenge anyway, couldn't accept any handouts as that would rob me of any victory I might be able to claw back. Luckily I could afford to lose it, but it'd have been nice not to have! Haha.
I make ok money at work anyway, not rich by any means at all, not dirt poor either. Im in a reasonable position to figure it out from here and with a little luck, grind my way back up the ladder.

[Anonymous No.29626492]

>>29626152

>>29626211
Turns out hes done for anyway. Terminal.
Were just having a comfy chat in here.

[Anonymous No.29626775]

About to buy 1,000 Hedera Hash for $130 dollars.
What do you guys think? The values been rising and from what I've read it looks promising. But is there anything I should know about before I jump in?

[Anonymous No.29626860]

>>29593368
Carbon monoxide poisoning combined with some sleeping pills is universally agreed to be the least painful and easiest way to kill yourself. Just have a generator running in a closed room, idle your car in your garage, or run a hose from your car's exhaust through one of the windows if you don't have any other option and then take some sleeping pills and pass out. You'll peacefully die in your sleep with no pain whatsoever.

[Anonymous No.29626917]

>>29626396
I'd just consider it reparations for whatever British ancestry I might have.
I think you'll do fine and not saying that as a plattitude you clearly have drive and the desire to better yourself and those are the qualities of a self made man.

and you are clearly smart, and I'm not worried about the haters they just didn't read but appreciate you looking out, if this thread dies off or whatever I'd love to keep it going just because it's better than most the nonsense on here.

but I am gonna go run out to get something to eat haven't today and I gotta eat at least once I day, although I can go without it's weird like I don't have an appetite even though I hear my stomach begging for food.

Not that I don't have food it's just like my body stays in a state of never being truly hungry.

[Anonymous No.29627022]

>>29593368
Zero sum game is a unethical system to support

[Anonymous No.29627243]

>>29626917
Thats ok dude, I really ought to get some sleep anyway, the only reason im up right now is because this is one of the best conversations ive had in a while, especially on here.
I'll keep an eye out for you in the future, and if I see you, i'll identify myself as the scotsman, haha.

I wish you all the best fren, and hope you do ok.
You are truly an hero.

[Anonymous No.29627285]

>>29593368
The most painless way of leaving would be to go up at the rapture and meet the Lord Jesus Christ. The most painful way to go would be lifting up your eyes in eternal torment.

[Anonymous No.29627416]

>>29627243
I can usually tell by the way people type but I will definitely keep an eye out for you, I went by Alexander earlier so may as well stick with that, get some sleep my friend and I agree this definitely have been a much much deeper and genuine conversation that I've had on most forums and especially here.

I wish you the best and I'm no hero haha but I'll take whatever win I can get lol.

[Anonymous No.29627934]

>>29627416
Till we meet again fren. Good night.

[Anonymous No.29628073]

>>29627934
Good Night fren, I'm sure I'll run into you again on here.

[Anonymous No.29628354]

>>29593368
My brother killed himself.
I exercise and meditate (Shikantaza)
Works for me.
But if you kill yourself, it’s not that big of a deal.

[Anonymous No.29629253]

>>29593368
weak ass nigga leave,

[Anonymous No.29629574]

>>29628354
I'm sorry that happened to you, I lost someone I was close to a few years back and it was devastating, I'm glad you're meditating.