/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

>Is this how a drug addicts feels like?
Yes.
>How do I fucking stop???
You've already admitted to yourself that you have an addiction. You also know that you deserve better than letting an addiction have power over you.
You need to make a conscious effort to overcome your addiction and fill the time you're currently spending with vtubers with quite literally anything else. Do you not have a job?

>>48026845
>Do you not have a job?
No. I used to have a Management Assistant job between 2019-2021 but my contract ended by late 2021 and, while looking for a job, I ended up finding vtubers instead.
I really wish I could turn back in time to 2018 so I could start a Computer Science degree instead of wasting 1 year wandering on the internet, 3 years on some random minimum wage job and 1 year and 1/3 watching anime girls. By this point I would already have graduated and perhaps 1 year of experience or more if I could get employed while studying.
Now I'm a NEET with no college degree and barely any working experience aside from sorting papers and playing on Excel for 3 years.
Fuck, looking at my former HS classmates social medias is even worst since they all seems well, some even already have family, some traveled internationally, some became slightly big people in their fields while I'm the runt.
I have never felt so much suicide inclinations before. Years of my life wasted in nothing. Perhaps learning English to a decent level was the noteworthy accomplishment since finishing high school.

>>48027675
Suside isn't an option, just get a job, do it whatever it might be, don't you want to buy your oshis merch? Keep yourself and the dream alive.

>>48027675 (me)
>learning English to a decent level
And even that it's still questionable since I can always find multiple flaws every time I re-read an English text that I wrote. This one for example, I forgot to write "only" before noteworthy and this is such a stupid mistake to make

>>48027675
My bad, that was somehow the one detail I missed in your original post.
>I really wish I could turn back in time to 2018 so I could start a Computer Science degree instead of wasting 1 year wandering on the internet, 3 years on some random minimum wage job and 1 year and 1/3 watching anime girls.
You can't turn back time, true, but this is only going to get worse for you the longer you drag your feet. As long as you can afford it, it's never too late for you to go back to school.
You haven't ruined your life yet, anon. You know for certain that you're going to ruin your life if you keep procrastinating on getting what really matters to you done instead by chasing cheap dopamine highs via vtubers.
You're capable of change. You wouldn't be crying for help like this if you weren't. You need to look into enrolling in school soon and maybe start jobhunting.
Are you living alone off your savings or are you living with your parents? If it's the latter, you're basically in a perfect position to get your shit together in the next few years. You can obviously still make this happen if you're already living alone, but it's probably gonna be a little more stressful.

>>48027797
Do you know perhaps a good online course for Computer Science? One that I don't need to god through 4 slow years full of filler content but one that actually teach you want you need for the job. I'm tired of looking into universities and the very first semester is always full of social fuckery stuff that has no relation to the course and only serves to waste 6 months of my life and slowly eat up my money.
An intensive college course where I HAVE to immerse myself completely and get the paper by late 2025 for example.

>>48026683
>>48027675
>>48027799
I wrote these

>>48026683
23 is so young. You can easily go back to school.
Don't try to study at home, force yourself into a different environment to learn or you'll fall back into old habits.

>>48028033
>are you living with your parents?
Yes, my mother shows concern about my future but after 5 years she kind started to not bother anymore, probably thinking I want nothing with life, while my stepfather doesn't care as long as I don't cause trouble like my sister used to do better leave the house like going out and coming back drunk.
>>48028263
>Don't try to study at home, force yourself into a different environment to learn or you'll fall back into old habits.
Will I fall into the comfort zone if I try studying online? I thought that was the opposite with all the "flexible schedule" talk and not having to spend money with bus and materials.

>>48027675
>barely any working experience aside from sorting papers and playing on Excel for 3 years.
You would be surprised how many jobs boil down to that skill alone. The majority of "web apps" for business purposes are elaborate frontend layers over spreadsheets in the cloud. I just sent a work email to someone in "HR", whose jobs is to take my emails (and emails from others) and turn them into changes to this-or-that about an employee's pay, title, benefits, reimbursements, etc.

But all she is doing is taking my instructions, and putting them into some software we pay for that manages those things: pay, title, benefits, reimbursements, etc. That software is just a spreadsheet in that cloud that also has the magical ability to occasionally send email.
We pay a person for this. To be the human in front of the elaborate spreadsheet-in-the-cloud. To take emails and deal with those details. None of it is something she learned in college. Does she have a college degree? Of course she does, because it proves she can work towards for four years, and put up with things that feel unimportant along the way, instead of flaking, or stealing from us, or any other shit. If a college degree isn't in a STEM field, all it says is "I was able to put up with arbitrary work for 4 years," and BY GOD THAT IS A USEFUL THING TO KNOW when you are hiring.

If you are actually half-decent with spreadsheets, the only thing keeping you from a job doing SOMETHING at a half-decent pay (and maybe only "half") is (1) an organized way to represent your skills and aptitude to an employer, and (2) the confidence to present yourself as being worthy of an employer's trust and time. College degrees are just a shorthand for those, and aren't always accurate. More than half of the people at my current company don't have a degree related to their current job or role.

>>48028508
There's seriously no better time than the present to get the ball rolling again, anon. Start looking for schools that you can see yourself getting a degree from. You don't have to participate in any of the social activities that you spoke about earlier, also. You can just go to school to get a degree.
You need to step out of your comfort zone in many ways.

>>48028568
>it proves she can work towards for four years
Correction:
*it proves she can work towards a goal for four years

>>48027799
Also don't worry about not having perfect English on 4chan. I'm a native speaker, now a manager, and when I don't proof-read what I type I find I have randomly left words out that I had thought in my head while I was typing.
Obviously I DO proofread when sending business emails, and I catch my mistakes mostly. But it's not something that blocks you from having a career or anything.

>>48028508
Flexibility suggests comfort. If you're studying in school, on school computers, around other students do you think you'll watch vtubers there?
And if there's something you should be spending money on, it's whatever you're using to better yourself. More money invested might make you care more.

>>48028795
>More money invested might make you care more.
That is the major reason for some people to pay for workout classes. The act of paying, and losing the money they paid if they skip, motivates them to follow through. If it's free you just kind of thing "Yeah I should work out, but... there's that thing I wanted to watch tonight and I don't have time for both."

>>48028130
Harvard's CS50, The Odin Project, r/FMHY browse through the educational / tools section, I can't recall accurately but there's free books about CS or anything else that you want to learn about right there, as well as even more quality courses to further your skill. Pirate every knowledge available in the internet as they are meant to be accessible to everyone for the betterment of our civilization. You can do it, anon. Whether you choose to be a loser forever or become somebody who you will be proud of is all up to how good you are at disciplining yourself.

>>48026683
ogey

>>48026683
>I started watching vtuber early 2022
Fuck off casual

>>48026683
become a clipfag
it's that easy

>>48032360
Not OP but these look pretty good, will definitely check out. Hopefully I can also stop being a loser in a few years

>>48027675
Calm down. I only started working at 32 and wasted several years in anxiety and internet. If youre gonna track your life as some sort of linear questline youve got sidetracked from, then youre gonna end up on a rope. Thats not how life works. Each new day is each new opportunity. Some things may end up flat out difficult though as you age, like dating, so id recommend giving that a try early. The job stuff etc.. can be picked up anytime.

>>48026683
you're really going to betray your oshi and miss out on streams just because of a moment of weakness? Don't be so silly anon, you're just having doubts now because you haven't been watching them long enough. Just keep watching streams and you'll settle into the pace of it nice and comfortably, trust me.

You wouldn't want to miss out on a kino moment in a stream, would you, anon?

>>48028130
>and the very first semester is always full of social fuckery stuff that has no relation to the course and only serves to waste 6 months of my life and slowly eat up my money
you fucking retard, that 'social fuckery' is absolutely necessary to the uni experience since it socializes you and changes you as a person (unless you willingly act antisocial and stay cooped up in your room all day when not at lectures like an absolute loser). I've never understood why people always complain about the social aspect of uni life; don't you want to improve your social skills? Make friends? Get laid?

Sounds to me like you're just cowardly and making excuses to stay in your asocial NEET mindset. You don't actually want to improve yourself or change your life or be confronted with any mildly awkward or difficult situations, you just want to live the exact same comfy life you do now except you magically get paid for it and aren't depressed somehow.
There is literally no downside to going to university, the only people who say there is are coping loser millenials that failed to get a job with their degree or NEET fucks like you who don't even understand what it's like and are still mentally in high school, scared by all the 'popular people' and 'extroverts.'