/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

>>75956786
To answer my own question: nah, Suisei won't even consider me. She is her own shining star, independent, set on the future and pushing through with whatever talent she has and a ton of effort - the complete opposite of me. She has gone to the heights unimaginable, and will hopefully retire a very successful and fulfilled woman. I just want my escapism media at this point, man. It did trick me for a while that I needed to have actual friendships and, god forbid, love. l now understand that I am just a husk under all the random trivia, media preferences, opinions and whining I expel into the world and that's no basis for an actual meaningful connection. And being able to put in effort to begin with without feeling like you are about to keel over from a mixture of boredom and frustration is a talent in an of itself, with which I wasn't blessed.