/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

>>41632324
While I can sympathize, from personal experience talking about how shit you are and how shit the result of you being shit is going to be is counter productive.
It's kind of like that thing where if you tell someone you're learning Japanese or starting to work out you're far less likely to do it because you're giving yourself the dopamine hit of that "okay, I'm doing the big thing".
What Vesper is doing is a lot like that.
He flagellates and beats himself up over the things he did and didn't do, he's getting the satisfaction of things returning to an "equilibrium" by him punishing himself and it alleviates the pressure to change, kind of like a milder version of self harm.

I used to be like that (probably still am) and I didn't become aware I'm doing it until I reached a proper low point, where self pity and self hate couldn't make up for the fact I fucked shit up for myself to the point where it was unfixable and I had to go looking for greener pastures.
I hope Vesper can learn that lesson before he passes the point of no return.
I had to be burned hard to figure it out but in retrospect the facts and patterns didn't change, only the way I was disassociating from it, so it's entirely possible to fix the situation before it hits you in the face.

He has to turn his "Sorry for being so shit and horrible and I understand if you hate me :((((((" into "Yes, I'm sorry", once he no longer permits himself the outlet of self flagellation his only option to avoid guilt and shame will be to avoid running into it.
He'll fuck up, carry that guilt until his next opportunity to fuck up, avoid fucking up and realize it's easier than dealing with the fallout.
It's anything but easy but that's the only way forward and I hope he's seeing a therapist since they're there exactly to deal with self destructive patterns like that.