/vr/ - Retro Games

[Anonymous No.4889994]

>Please, let me help you come inside.

[Anonymous No.4890003]

[Anonymous No.4890009]

[Anonymous No.4890010]

lewd

[Anonymous No.4890021]

How about that? You found my magic medicine.

[Anonymous No.4890026]

>>4890009
>come all over her juicy tan tits instead

[Anonymous No.4890039]

The hatches are open

[Anonymous No.4890053]

>>4890026

[Anonymous No.4890087]

[Anonymous No.4890126]

>>4890009
>>4890053
>>4890087
not thicc enough.

[Anonymous No.4890129]

>>4890126
and now the thread rolls downhill

[Anonymous No.4890139]

>>4889994
>Miyamoto sees women as nothing but disposable cum dumpsters
What a true visionary

[Anonymous No.4890535]

>>4890139
Nurses existed in medieval times too you know

[Anonymous No.4890540]

>>4890535

Not ones dressed like her: >>4890009 >>4890053 >>4890087

[Anonymous No.4890546]

>>4890126
adventure of sausage link

[Anonymous No.4890597]

>>4890126
now thats realistic

[Anonymous No.4890642]

>>4889994
Aww no... Link's a poon hound.

[Anonymous No.4891063]

>>4890535
In this dungeon crawling RPG, the church girls heal you with sex when you fell in dungeon.

[Anonymous No.4891065]

>>4891063
>all those bright and vibrant colors
I miss that era of manga/anime art

[Anonymous No.4891068]

>>4890642
And how!

[Anonymous No.4891072]

>>4891065
The (sex) healers. The red haired girl is my favorite.

[Anonymous No.4891083]

>>4889994
Who did this after you got ther LIFE spell anyway? You just spammed it as the old woman refilled your magic bar.

[Anonymous No.4891086]

>>4891083
>prefer old woman than young sexy lady

[Anonymous No.4891137]

>>4891083
I bet you talked to the church guy instead of Zelda in the sanctuary for the heart refill too

[Ice Manon No.4891172]

>>4890126
And the thread dies

[Anonymous No.4891410]

>>4891063
>church girls heal you with sex

Now that's a religion I can get behind, if you know what I mean.

[Anonymous No.4891428]

>>4891410
You donate to them a portion of each paycheck?

[Anonymous No.4891484]

>>4889994
>cum inside

[Anonymous No.4891640]

>>4889994
good times

[Anonymous No.4891645]

>>4891063
those pits are real something

[Anonymous No.4894114]

cuntthrust

[Anonymous No.4894148]

>>4889994

[Anonymous No.4894398]

>>4891063
Sorry for bothering you, pal. I'm new to the PC-98 scene, where can I download it from? The only site that I know doesn't have it.

[Anonymous No.4894675]

>>4894398
Sorry, I don't know. I either played the DOS/V version or the Chinese version in mid 90s.

Here's a vndb link if you need more details.
https://vndb.org/v18062

[Anonymous No.4894704]

>>4889994
Isn’t it crazy how the games we played as kids were actually really fucked up? Like what’s the deal with those mushrooms in Mario or the “green herbs” in Resident Evil? Were Jill and Chris just like ripping nonstop bongs lol

[Anonymous No.4894757]

>>4894704
DUDE
WEED
LMAO

[Anonymous No.4894771]

>>4894757
I’m thinking of trying standup. I’ve got this really funny original bit about how Shaggy and Scooby were actually just friggin’ huge cheeba hawks. What do you guys think?

[Anonymous No.4894773]

>>4894771
Real talk: If you can come up with a plausible explanation to them actually being undercover NARCs, that'd be legit funny.

[soda No.4894823]

for Faerie's sake PLEASE! that duengon is pitch black i NEED this!!

[Anonymous No.4894893]

>>4890546
gud 1 mate

[Anonymous No.4895473]

>>4889994
Omfg I never thought about it this way lol. You guys ever see those YouTube cartoons where it’s like adult Mario Kart with swearing and blood? Basically the pinnacle of comedy for me.

[Anonymous No.4896141]

>>4891063
I swear I will find this game for download somewhere, and I will come back and share it with you perverted little fags with good taste.

[Anonymous No.4896167]

>>4896141
I found a 1.95 GB ROM set on ISO Zone and if the game isn't in there, we're fucked

[Anonymous No.4896265]

>>4891063
>>4894398
>>4894675
The moment you all have been waiting for

Mirage 1: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1IByAOZOQn82t_6WpRv035Ufn15EdOI-I/view?usp=sharing

Mirage 2: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mIwhGKgMUsbXmCG39EkfRA_gBZqIlhdN/view?usp=sharing

The ROM set I found did indeed have both games

If you guys ever come back, you're welcome.

[Anonymous No.4896271]

>>4890126
fat npc lady is best npc

[Anonymous No.4896273]

>>4890087
nice editing, you really did it

[Anonymous No.4896276]

>>4896271

[Anonymous No.4896390]

>>4896276
A whole lot of chubby chasers ITT

[Anonymous No.4896626]

>>4896265
Bless you, Anon! Thank you!

[Anonymous No.4896724]

>>4889994
No way this isn't prostitution. How did it get past NOA's censors?

[Anonymous No.4896749]

[Anonymous No.4896964]

>>4896265
Noice. Thank you, anon. Pic poster here. Are these the PC-98 versions? In 2011, they released a bundle called Mirage Special Edition. It had Mirage 1 & 2. I don't know if they remastered the graphics.

[Anonymous No.4896978]

>>4896749
dude sex lmao

[Anonymous No.4896993]

>>4896978
You leave Kacho alone.

[Anonymous No.4897216]

>>4896964
As far as I'm concerned these are the original versions since they came out of the PC-98 pack and contained the release years in their names.

Also looking back to last night I don't know why I didn't just put both games into one zip, I actually apologize for that even if I haven't been called out for it yet.

[Anonymous No.4897218]

>>4896978
Don't you dare shit on Arino, faggot

[Anonymous No.4897230]

>>4891072
>ニート …

[Anonymous No.4897238]

>many virgins jerked off to this thread
Disgusting

[Anonymous No.4897623]

>>4896724
It isn't prostitution because Link isn't paying anything.

Also, there's nothing in the game that implies it's sex, for all we know she gives him some good home cooking, or a place to sleep, or good old fashioned first aid. People just have gutter minds so they jump right to it being sex... How sex is supposed to heal anyone, I'll never understand, it's actually exhausting, and a half dead person certainly couldn't do it very well.

[Anonymous No.4897624]

>>4897218
>>4896993
how do i subscribe to his channel, he seems like a pretty fun lets player to watch

[Anonymous No.4897626]

>>4891068
Fuck off Zelda, Link don't owe you shit.

[Anonymous No.4897767]

>>4897623
Not when she does all the work.

[Anonymous No.4897806]

>>4889994
Dude what if Mario is actually just tripping balls on shrooms lmao.

[Anonymous No.4897849]

>>4897806
dude wat if ur gay lmao xD

[Anonymous No.4897989]

>>4890126
>>4896271
>>4896276
that's not thicc, thats OBESE, you greasy cunts

[Anonymous No.4898041]

>>4897989
observe as I continue to refer to them as thicc and diregard what it is that you just said

[Anonymous No.4898073]

>>4890126
That's just fat tho. Not 90-60-90 aka thicc.

[Anonymous No.4898084]

>>4897849
what if the mushrooms are dicks and mario is gay

[Anonymous No.4898093]

>>4898084
>>4897806
Am I back on 2006 Newgrounds?

[Anonymous No.4898098]

>>4897623
Even people back in 1988 Japan were making the joke. Picture from a Zelda 2 strategy guide.

[Anonymous No.4898108]

>>4898098
that 1988 art is smoldering hot, none of the shitty fanarts above can touch it (especially the fat fetish ones)

[Anonymous No.4898115]

>>4898108
The fat ones are drawing the fat towns person NPC (who is exclusive to the US release of Zelda 2).

[Anonymous No.4898157]

>>4898098
Well, yeah, people were also saying Mario was high on shrooms and Peach was actually having an affair with Bowser, doesn't make them true.

[Anonymous No.4898371]

>>4898115

>fat towns person
>exclusive to the US release

this checks out.

[Anonymous No.4898375]

>>4898098
Yes, and this joke will never not be hacky as fuck.

[Anonymous No.4898395]

>>4898375
Now tell us that extra lives are haram.

[Anonymous No.4898407]

>>4898395
I don't know what you're talking about.

[Anonymous No.4898459]

Anyone have a screenshot of the fat girl's actual sprite? I don't remember this but I haven't played Zelda 2 in like 25 years.

[Anonymous No.4898980]

>>4898459

[Anonymous No.4899258]

>>4897216
No need to apologize. I'm grateful for the uploads.

[Anonymous No.4899436]

>>4889994
>No thanks m'lady i have to play DUAL ORB 2 real fast

[Anonymous No.4899446]

>>4899436
>look ma I posted it again!

[Anonymous No.4899463]

>>4890021
Opioid crisis is out of control

[Anonymous No.4899473]

is this jump possible

[Anonymous No.4899486]

>>4889994
>Nips use vidya to subtly push /ss/
based

[Anonymous No.4899490]

>>4899486
Link isn’t a kid in that game.

[Anonymous No.4899491]

>>4899436
"There are too many final fantasy 7 threads", he said. "I need to shitpost about some game nobody gives a damn about so I will look cool on an anonymous imageboard!", he said.

Go ahead and say "no you don't get it, Dual Orb is great because it's got monster trucks and sniper rifles!", you know you don't have an actual counterargument. Oh and by the way, that game doesn't have any of that you LARP'ing punk.

>>4898041
>observe as I continue to be a moron and call things what they aren't because I'm a stubborn ass
Fixed for you. And no being obese is never a good thing. Stop drinking soda and eating junkfood and go outside for once you fatass.

>>4889994
They should've asked rupees for healing and regaining magic like in most RPGs. It just doesn't feel right for some reason.

[Anonymous No.4899501]

>>4898980
*fap fap fap*

[Anonymous No.4899508]

>>4899486
Link is an older teenager/young adult in that game, straight shota is preteens and early teens

[Anonymous No.4899523]

>>4890053
but you can go inside uninjured

[Anonymous No.4899538]

admit it
this part scared you

[Anonymous No.4899548]

>>4899491
No you don't get it, DUAL ORB 2 is great because it's got monster trucks and sniper rifles!

[Anonymous No.4899554]

>>4899538
Honestly the whole game scared me because the sidescrolling and the music are both creepy and the things on the world map move around like spiders.

[Anonymous No.4899572]

>>4899548
I was sorely disappointed when I looked up Dual Orb 2 and discovered it was just a generic JRPG and not a badass shmup or Contra type game like I was picturing.

[Anonymous No.4899684]

[Anonymous No.4899742]

>>4899538
>>4899554
RETURN OF GANON scared me
second scariest game over in my childhood after Ninja Gaiden arcade

[Anonymous No.4899770]

>>4899436
>>4899548
hahaha that's a funny meme you got there, mind if we document it?

[Anonymous No.4901489]

>>4889994

[Anonymous No.4901518]

Serious question. Why are Japs so obsessed with coming inside?

[Anonymous No.4901523]

>>4899770

I am proud to say I have absolutely no idea what this meme is about.

[Anonymous No.4901537]

>>4901518
anxiety over catastrophically low birth rates

[Anonymous No.4901609]

>>4896265
Stupid question but how do i open it? I open the zip file and there's a bunch of .fdd file

[Anonymous No.4901663]

>>4901518
It's the pleasure.

[Anonymous No.4901696]

>>4901609
>fdd
It's Floppy Disk Drive

[Anonymous No.4901697]

>>4890546
hi-O!

[Anonymous No.4901881]

>>4901696
im guessing the only way to open it is by having a floppy disk?

[Anonymous No.4901887]

>>4901881
Years ago it needed the hardware. Now it needs a software.

[Anonymous No.4901930]

>>4894771
My friend and I used to call our stash "scooby snacks" and when we were in the presence of company (usually our dumb friends) and we wanted to smoke we'd say that we were going to "look for clues".

[Anonymous No.4901938]

>>4890126
>>4896271
i mean by medieval standards, this is like a 10 so i wouldn't blame link

[Anonymous No.4901940]

>>4897989
only the first one is even close to obese you pedo

[Anonymous No.4901943]

>>4899491
As a person who hates DUAL ORB 2, you sure read the DUAL ORB 2 threads

[Anonymous No.4901949]

Spectrum 48k

[Anonymous No.4901953]

>>4901887
What software do you use? I never tried opening a floppy game before

[Anonymous No.4901956]

>>4901953
The disks are PC-98 disks. Find a PC-98 emulator. If you follow the threads, you should know it was PC-98.

[Anonymous No.4902437]

>>4901938
That shit about landwhales being beautiful in middle ages is a lie.

[Anonymous No.4902504]

>>4902437
actual history disagrees. it was also just an idealized ideological thing since fatness was often associated with wealth and abundance since didn't have the resourced to consume like we do today
>landwhales
sounds like you just have a bone to pick

[Anonymous No.4903545]

>>4902504
That's the equivocal of someone's lobster/shark furry art on the internet. Doesn't mean it was the standard of beauty at the time.

[Anonymous No.4903558]

>>4902504
Also, feel free to give a single fucking reference finding any valid data about Venus figurines as anything related to beauty outside some "pre-historians" assumptions which are not valid data.

P.S. You won't.

[Anonymous No.4903585]

>>4902504
>prehistorian figures with messed up proportions are proofs that people loved lardasses in the past
nice

[Anonymous No.4903801]

>>4902504
Dayuuuum

[Anonymous No.4903813]

>>4902504
right, and those people also didn't know anything about modern medicine. obesity takes off 7-14 years of your life.

t. a 440-lb man

[Anonymous No.4904150]

>>4903545
weird they were found all over the place then. it's not like pornographic images just didn't real back then. of course it wasn't the "standard of beauty" back then, those proportions were downright impossible for anyone outside of maybe royalty, and certainty wasn't at all in prehistory. it's an idealized woman. that's my point.
>>4903558
what do you think they are? they're clearly sexual in nature. i'm really not sure what else they could represent.
>>4903585
>supposed representation of a literal fertility goddess doesn't represent what was considered the ideal woman
right.

also this all reeks of samefag
>>4903813
of course obesity isn't healthy, that wasn't my point.

i mean i could go into how higher caloric density and wider hips are obviously better for shit like childbirth and thus intrinsically linked to sexuality especially before modern hospitals made things like that invalid but i don't feel like i have a particularly honest audience

[Anonymous No.4904160]

>>4904150
The cooch doesn't get wider because you're fat.

[Anonymous No.4904201]

>>4904160
yeah that's why thin women sometimes have to literally have their hips popped out from the inside for doctors to even get in there to begin with

though yeah the caloric energy a woman can spend during is probably more important.

[Anonymous No.4904205]

>>4904201
Are you enjoying your summer break?

[Anonymous No.4904212]

>>4904205
people having an aneurysm over a drawing of a fat lady is the most summer thing about this thread

[Anonymous No.4905469]

>>4904201
A woman can have wide hips without being fat. She can also have narrow hips without being thin.

[Anonymous No.4906059]

>>4905469
Fat accumulation and distribution is genetic, as is having a wide pelvis. Though yes, they aren’t always mutually exclusive, or inclusive for that matter. I’m sure malnutrition can also cause developmental issues when it comes to bone growth.

[Anonymous No.4906138]

>>4906059
Fat distribution is genetic, but accumulating it has to do with eating excess food.

[Anonymous No.4906392]

>>4906138
That combined with metabolism and physical activity.

[Anonymous No.4906424]

>>4906392
Physical activity increases metabolism and together this determines where the line of "excess" is, so I'm already accounting for that. 2000 calories per day can be excessive for someone who lives a completely sedentary lifestyle and it will cause them to gain weight. Meanwhile, someone who's extremely active on a daily basis might lose weight if they consume "only" 3000 calories per day. "Excess" is a moving target.

[Anonymous No.4908113]

>>4901537
>catastrophically low
>country the size of California with 120 million inhabitants
Constant growth is a capitalist meme, the earth has finite resources why the FUCK would you want more humans

[Anonymous No.4908216]

>>4908113
>why the FUCK would you want more humans

Because without more humans the whole population will eventually become too old to sustain itself and die off. You need young people to take care of the older people and produce things for them.

[Anonymous No.4908218]

>>4908113

Because noone has yet found a functioning alternative system and in the halfway functioning one a stable base of the age pyramid is requred to keep the systems for healthcare, pensions etc functioning, therefore a constant stream of new young people and ideally the elderly dying quickly is needed .
Every experiment with real communism has failed spectacularly because there are always people more equal than others, it seems to be incompatible with human nature.

[Anonymous No.4908225]

>>4908218
>communism requires people to be equal
This is the biggest capitalist meme of all.

[Anonymous No.4908235]

>>4908216
That's such a bizarre "in theory" even though you probably think it makes sense. Demographics would have to get so absurdly imbalanced for it to be an actual existential threat to humanity it's not something that could happen practically. Even then there would be humans being born constantly even if some kind of oldpocalypse happened and society stopped functioning. Constant growth is something used to enrich those who stand to benefit while the rest of us have to fight over littler and littler..

also if you care about ecology at all there are already too many people on the planet

[Anonymous No.4908319]

>>4908235

I'm not even necessarily talking about constant growth in the sense that we always need tons and tons of people and a booming population. But if the death rate outpaces the birth rate in a region, there's only so much longer people will be in that region. It's basic math.

[Anonymous No.4908356]

>>4908113
Cuz the gubbmint will think its a bright idea to flood the country with immigrants to sustain all the leftover infrastructure and muh gdp.

[Anonymous No.4908359]

>>4908225
Capitalism is just a communist meme. Its all just materialism anyway.

[Anonymous No.4908408]

>>4896276
Yum.

[Anonymous No.4908625]

[Anonymous No.4909008]

>>4898980
I hated that dumb hair fuck on the left

[Anonymous No.4909012]

>>4899473
only in secret michael jordan mode.

[Anonymous No.4909029]

>>4899684
fucking p-bags, thanks for reminding me

[Anonymous No.4909042]

>>4908356
>japan
>welcoming foreigners

They tolerate foreigners, sometimes can be friends on an individual basis with them, but no way in hell is Japan going to welcome outsiders like the Western countries would/have done/are doing.

[Anonymous No.4909050]

>>4909042

If globalism wants it hard enough, Japan WILL be flooded with immigrants, liking them or not. And combine that with them being so passive, it wouldn't even be that difficult.

[Anonymous No.4909052]

>>4909050
you have no idea what you're talking about, pretty sure on even 2channel they're hostile towards foreigners

[Anonymous No.4909060]

>>4909052

Pretty sure they are, but chans are hardly a sample size for anything. And push comes to shove, most of these people wouldn't go berserk and start doing something about it. It's like that in the West, as well. Good guys are losing because they are not able to do anything about it.

[Anonymous No.4909405]

>>4891068
That Benedict Cumberbatch lookin mother fucker

[Anonymous No.4909570]

>>4909008
I always felt bad for them, the "regular guys" of Hyrule that likely get conscripted by the hundreds to fight off Gannon when he turns.

[Anonymous No.4909589]

I bet they went inside to have sex! Having sex made his life bar fill up!

[Anonymous No.4910617]

>>4909589
Thanks, cpt. obvious