/vr/ - Retro Games

[Anonymous No.1514017]

Hi /vr/, /m/ here, say I want to know what exactly is the worst retro game out there? Not even "so bad its good" or even "it so bland", but games that are just bad and only got worse. /m/ has Valvrave and /co/ has Marville, so do you anons have something of that level? I figured I might as well ask people that know what the hell they're talking about.

[Anonymous No.1514029]

cheetahmen

[Anonymous No.1514032]

Action 52

[Anonymous No.1514058]

http://www.gameskinny.com/ru72i/the-worst-game-ever-ninja-gaiden-nes

[Anonymous No.1514105]

>>1514029
>>1514032
knew it was gonna be this

for me I'd say it's probably soltaire for the nes.

[Anonymous No.1514129]

>>1514017
I think it depends on whether or not you're including unfinished and unlicensed games.

Little Red Hood for the NES is in the basket of "unfinished games that were released anyway for easy money," but it was an unlicensed game released in 1990, when a single guy testing his own game out probably counted as quality control. Even then, it only touched the soil of Taiwan and Australia.

Cheetahmen II is almost unplayable but it was never officially released. That's not the case for Big Rigs.

From a technical view with consideration of release date, I would definitely say Big Rigs. The developers had no business releasing such a game and having it put in stores while it was (according to one of the co-owners of the company) still in the pre-alpha stage. The engine for the game was licensed to the developers for a share of the company. It was published, it was rated by the ESRB. People spent money on it in real stores.

...Even then, it's not like the game is the polar opposite of fun and joy. It's really funny to those who have just seen gameplay footage and watched reviews of it. Something like Superman 64 would qualify better than Big Rigs for worst game ever if you're seeking the "opposite of fun." It was also officially published, rated by the ESRB, and sold in stores. Worse yet, the developers actually tried to pass of the excessive use of distance fog (presumably there because the game couldn't render anything) as "Kryptonite fog."

[Anonymous No.1514135]

>>1514058

Never has 'git gud' been more appropriate.

[Anonymous No.1514139]

There is so much fucking shovelware out there it's impossible to say. If we were actually trying to nail it down to something that nicely represents what those things represent to the other boards I gotta go with Cheetahmen as well.

It's a good combination of something that's well known to us, rare and valuable, features a recognizable character and is really bad

[Anonymous No.1514141]

>>1514129
Except Big Rigs isn't a retro game... Also please stop fucking watching AVGN

[Anonymous No.1514145]

Amiga port of Castlevania

[Anonymous No.1514151]

>>1514017
Probably the problem is that not everyone has the same footing on /vr/. Some people start on different consoles, NES, Genesis, SNES, PC, anything, and each of them has a whole list of "bad games" which is really hard to compare with each other. And it's not like you can just download it and play. Well, actually you can, but I doubt most will be bothered by the amount of suggestions that will come out. I mean, who will spend their time getting a lot of games just to experience the awfulness of each of them.

[Anonymous No.1514158]

Yeah, it's probably gotta be Action 52.

It was ridiculously expensive and not a single game included on the multicart was even remotely playable. Also, the cart itself had something wrong with it and hot incredibly hot while playing, so I'd say the inherent cart defect should be included when talking about the game's quality.

I wish I could tell you something more unknown, but Action 52 really is the legendary epitome of awfulness. The fact that a developer managed to make 52 games without a single one of them being anywhere close to even 'playably bad' is something of an achievement.

[Anonymous No.1514159]

>>1514058
This is the worst article ever written. And i'm not saying that only because NG1 is a favorite game of mine, but because it is objectively an extremely poor argument as well.

[Anonymous No.1514162]

>>1514141
sorry ignore the last part of my post. I guess my point was supposed to be that there's a ton of retro games that shouldn't even count because they weren't finished.

I find Infiltrator for the NES to be my personal worst game of all time, but apparently it was a port.

[Anonymous No.1514175]

>>1514151
I remember this. This was a DOS game, right?

After looking up a gameplay video, I don't remember it being this bad.

[Anonymous No.1514234]

>>1514058

As if Ninja Gaiden isn't a masterpiece.

Speaking as someone who didn't play it until recently and has no nostalgia attached to it, it's just...addictive. The speed at which you move? The fast gameplay? The challenge? It's so good.

[Anonymous No.1514510]

>>1514158
the good thing of Action 52 is that someone could remake the 52 games and make the thing WAY BETTER,but that's all

[Anonymous No.1514794]

Home Alone (NES)

[Anonymous No.1514805]

Action 52 is pretty much 52 bad games in one so it has an extreme level of shit that few can hope to reach. It's one thing to make a bad game but making 52 is something else. The only thing that is not shit is the music from Cheetahmen.

[Anonymous No.1514812]

>>1514234
>responding to an obvious troll

[Anonymous No.1515016]

>>1514129
OP here. I suppose as long as there was an official release date and has an ending it would qualify.

[Anonymous No.1515021]

>>1514805
Add on top of that that even the worst, shittiest NES game you can think of besides Action 52 was at least finished.

I can't even say Action 52 was finished.

[Anonymous No.1516602]

There's a number of pretty bad Japan-only NES games too, like Super Monkey Daibouken and A Week of Garfield

[Anonymous No.1516743]

>>1514058
This guy didn't even lists examples why he thought it was hard. I was expecting a page 2 or something because that article felt like an introduction for an even larger review. You can just sum that entire article up as "I found this game too hard so it sucks."

[Anonymous No.1516994]

>>1514017
Let me tell you about worst game on...well...not really NES but Famicom - "Erunaaku no zaihou"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7BUegKwrh0

The game has some kind of lifebar and morality bar. The idea is - you walking. And you going to walk cycles until you've met some requirements which hinted with riddles written in moonrunes.

Here is full walkthrough.
http://nicoviewer.net/sm10804755

EVERYTHING in this game is hidden! It's shittier than milon's secret asshole!

[Anonymous No.1517025]

>>1514129
>pass off the bad render distance as kryptonite fog
Spider-Man did that too, but that game was great.

[Anonymous No.1517069]

I'd say Desert Bus but that game achieved exactly what it set out to do

[Anonymous No.1517134]

>>1516602
A Week of Garfield sounds like a horrible experience.

[Anonymous No.1518418]

>>1517069
There is nothing bad about Desert Bus, it's just really boring.

[Anonymous No.1518525]

>>1517069
>>1518418
Technically speaking it's a very well made game in that respect.

[Anonymous No.1518581]

>>1517069
I had no idea that Desert Bus was actually real, I thought Penn was just joking about an idea he had that had never been made.

[Anonymous No.1518587]

>>1518581
Its real, but unreleased. Its a finished, playable game.

[Anonymous No.1518618]

>>1514139

got to agree with the amount of shovelware... there used to be a 'gauntlet' that ran (might still be going on /vg/ i'm not sure) that involved playing games that were randomly selected from older consoles. Through doing that i realised just how much of the nes games are absolute shit, and it's probably worse for other consoles in the same era.

One such game i had randomly selected for me was Operation Secret Storm. I can't even begin to describe what it's like, but it's broken to fuck and is so nonsensical it actually ended up being kind of fun to play in a 'what the fuck where they thinking' kind of way

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFkiADY0Cro