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/vr/ - Retro Games


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10920668 No.10920668[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Hey guys, this is Layne Floigley. You might know me as the lead singer of Floigan in Chains (formerly Alice in Chains). By the way, I'm dead. Anyway, I ran into a couple old buddies of mine while I was buying a pack of smokes at the Circle K last week: Floig Jones Jr. and Tyrese Floigson. We used to shoot junk and watch cartoons together n' stuff... it was real cool, man. By the way, I'm dead. Anyway, they were telling me how there was some anti-floiganism going down 'round these parts, and they said I should stop by and have a little chat with you guys. The first thing I want you to know is that I used to be a huge faggot. Everybody thought I was super chill and friendly n' stuff, even though all I ever did was sing about depression, drug use, and suicide. I also invited a guy on stage during one of my concerts and sucker punched him for giving a Nazi salute while surrounded by hundreds of fans and security guards because of how tolerant and brave I was n' stuff, even though I had no problem directly funding murder and child trafficking by buying massive amounts of black market opiates. I even let my girlfriend get fucked by a bunch of old men for heroin money even though I had millions of dollars, because I spent it all on heroin. By the way, she's dead. Anyway, the point is, I was a total douchenozzle n' stuff. Then, I found Floigan, and everything changed. Floigan made me realize how much of a retarded fag I had been. After undergoing floigalysis, I started changing myself for the better: I started regularly washing my bed linens, I got a Costco membership, I read Mein Kampf, I stopped shooting as much junk, and I even started working on the whole me being dead thing n' stuff. Look friend, the fact is... Floigan changed me, and Floigan can change you, too. Just stop like, being all hateful n' stuff. Open your heart and accept Floigan into your life. By the way, I'm Layne Floigley, and I'm dead.

>> No.10920673
File: 57 KB, 1280x720, balls.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920673

>WwwwWWATCH HIM BECooOOME a FLLLLooOOOIG

>> No.10920674

>>10920668
>>10920673
soul.

>> No.10920675
File: 52 KB, 500x488, ysbadboyswatchagunnado.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920675

bye bye floigan

>> No.10920683
File: 160 KB, 957x915, 1705846037142106.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920683

>>10920675
yo... yo... yo, now check it...

we was starin' at the blue sky, started feelin' so high,
lookin' for an answer in the clouds as they flew by

sun came out and found one, name was Stolar,
made the man president and fired him (bipolar)

God had the same plan, made the same man,
took him back and left a name in the sand

had a talk with big G, asked him what's the D?
said we had to do for SEGA what Bernie did for we

yeah, life been hard without Saint Bernard,
gettin' by on broken bottles and smokin' the shards

but we knew we had a mission, couldn't be dissin'
loaded the gats and left for khazar fishin'

pulled up, saw a rabbi by the temple
clicked the 9 and left him with a new
dimple

next stop was Mario, put him in the car to go,
had him tied up and beggin' sayin' "I'm-a sorry-o!"

'membered Big Bern, stomach starta turn,
put the gun to the plumber and await the lesson learned

pulled the trigger, no more wahoo,
no more Nintendo and no more jew

looked back at the sky, saw a friend,
he looked down and said "the future is Floigan"

we out.

>> No.10920691
File: 33 KB, 525x517, mariosad.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920691

>>10920683
mama mia! you berry berry rude!

>> No.10920692

>>10920683
Holy fucking based.
Mario niggers on suicide watch.

>> No.10920702

>/vr/'s darkest hour
>floigan returns
maybe god is real

>> No.10920703

>>10920691
>tfw the last thing Mario saw before awaiting the lesson learned

>> No.10920713

Good on you dude, a site filled with fags reposting pepes, wojaks and bait threads and you actually make some OC. Floigan is too pure for this gay world.

>> No.10920721

>>10920673
aic was a good band but layne was kind of a faggot wasnt he

>> No.10920725

>>10920721
it's just bantz, dave. calm down

>> No.10920731
File: 775 KB, 720x1001, Screenshot_20240509-232407.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920731

>>10920725
>it's just bantz
bro...

>> No.10920735

>>10920731
zoomer can't handle the bantz, many such cases

>> No.10920736
File: 134 KB, 800x531, Alice_N'_Chains_1987_photo.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920736

>>10920735
bro.

>> No.10920737

>>10920736
too much bantz for zoomzoom

>> No.10920740

>>10920737
>a man wearing a dress isn't gay, it's just bantz man haha
good thing floigalysis changed this dude's life

>> No.10920746

10/10 thread.

>> No.10920750
File: 41 KB, 898x886, K I N O.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920750

>>10920668
>>10920673
>>10920683
Yep. I'm thinking this is kino.

>> No.10920753

Floigbro, where have you been?

>> No.10920763

>>10920753
I mean this sincerely: /vr/ moderation has an anti-floigan algorithm. If you post a floigan meme image without changing at least one pixel of the picture, their filter will automatically quarantine and prune the thread. Yes, they filter threads by image and color data. See for yourself:
>>/vr/?task=search&ghost=false&search_text=layne
This is a deepstate website and they have an invested interest in stopping the floigsperience. The problem? Well, it's just that... you can't stop the floigsperience. Floigan won.

>> No.10920768

>>10920763
Be careful man.

>> No.10920771
File: 344 KB, 396x640, 1698467806732710.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920771

>>10920763
No! Mario numbah one! And Floigan is done! Come on anons do da Mario!

>> No.10920772
File: 214 KB, 1756x1036, 1705766657605146.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920772

>>10920771

>> No.10920778

>>10920772
the moment mario officially moved over

>> No.10920781
File: 805 KB, 301x312, 5cf0af5b40caa6b2169fb1466261debf.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10920781

>>10920772
We're the Mario Brothers, and plumbing's our game!
We're not like the others who get all the fame
If your thread is in trouble, you can call us on the double
We're faster than the others, you'll be hooked on the brothers, UH!
Yo, you're in for a treat, so hang on to your seat
Get ready for adventure and remarkable feats
You'll meet Koopa, the Troopas, the Princess, and the others Hangin' with the plumbers, you'll be hooked on the brothers!
*Verification not required.*

>> No.10920783

>>10920781
>Mario said all this with dried cum in his moustache

>> No.10920786

I wish I could snap all of your necks