/vr/ - Retro Games

[Anonymous No.10035148]

You are confined for 1000 years in a cell with one game on any system. no mods except fixes, no multiplayer. What do you pick?

[Anonymous No.10035171]

>>10035148
Alpha Centauri.

[Anonymous No.10035176]

[Anonymous No.10035183]

In 1000 years I should be able to beat it two or three times.

Probably won't get to max out all the jobs though, scientists need to come up with something better.

[Anonymous No.10035184]

>>10035148
Yo Noid

[Anonymous No.10035192]

>>10035148
Just one game? For one thousand years? Dang.
Ocarina of Time, then. The fishing game alone is enough to justify the decision. It'd still be hell.

[Anonymous No.10035206]

>>10035148
Isnt there a game on gameboy advance thats basically reading the bible ? Id take that,i just hope its not the KJV.

[Anonymous No.10035212]

Bangai-O N64

[Anonymous No.10035221]

>>10035148
One of the best DS9 episodes. Poor O'Brien.

[Anonymous No.10035229]

>>10035148
>future
>could
Now that's some hard hitting journalism about real science.

[Anonymous No.10035230]

>>10035148
Gonna be piping quite a bit.

[Anonymous No.10035245]

>>10035229
My personal theory about articles like that is because journslists are already Satan's little helpers and so they'll throw out shit like "Guys TECHNICALLY we could create Hell on earth" in hopes that someone will so the little suffering mongers can feed off the misery for attention.

[Anonymous No.10035301]

only the best

[Anonymous No.10035385]

>>10035183
This game actually gets fun around 150 years in

[Anonymous No.10035392]

Not retro but Metal Gear Solid 4. I'll finish watching it close to my release.

[Anonymous No.10035402]

>>10035148
1000 years is a pretty long time. I think I'd try to learn chess or something, maybe I'll be able to beat stockfish level 4 before the time is up.

[Anonymous No.10035447]

>>10035148
>no mods except fixes
so yes mods?

[Anonymous No.10035470]

>>10035148
>time is a mental construct
WHOA DUDE

[Anonymous No.10035474]

>>10035392
this reminds me of that guy from lost who saved a novel from his favorite writer for when he's old and dying.

[Anonymous No.10035481]

russian roulette with a semi automatic pistol

[Anonymous No.10035501]

>>10035148
something with an arbitrary execution glitch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL_Zuc0tlvo

[Anonymous No.10035506]

assuming they only allow retro games like real prisons do (based).
trackmania united.
or better something with a proper programming language included with it's editor.
if they disallowed map editors and shit, i'd take gran turismo 4. maybe in 100 years i'll manage to test every car on every track and find advantages and disadvantages of each.
>>10035501
nice idea, but are you sure you will be able to do anything meaningful with it?

[Anonymous No.10035531]

>>10035506
yeah, when i have free time

[Anonymous No.10035556]

>>10035148
Superman 64

[Anonymous No.10035668]

Retro: Sim City 4 Deluxe
Not Retro: Civ V

[Anonymous No.10035676]

>>10035206
Kjv is best version.

[Anonymous No.10035707]

>>10035676
No its not,kjv-only people are the worst.

[Anonymous No.10035760]

>>10035676
>>10035707
>these quibbles
If you're not reading in the original Greek, Aramaic abd Hebrew you're just a larper anyway.

[Anonymous No.10035779]

>>10035506
This is a good idea actually. I'd probably go RPG Maker in that case and just make a big fuck-off game and play it myself every few years.

[Anonymous No.10035780]

>>10035183
>>10035385
I was reading old magazines and saw even reviewers would give it glowing praise and tell the audience to look beyond the graphics, but even they would go "holy god this game is LONG you aren't prepared for how LONG this fucking game is"

[Anonymous No.10035789]

>>10035148
Not retro but Lego simulator

[Anonymous No.10035794]

>>10035779
then I pick wolf RPG editor

[Anonymous No.10035818]

>>10035171
This, Masters of Magic or Aurora 4x.

[Anonymous No.10035838]

>>10035760
i dont think God expect me to learn 3 damn language just to get his message,i think the one larping is you.

[Anonymous No.10035906]

>>10035838
Only way to get the true message is from God himself. Anything else is altered by the whims and thoughts of man.

[Anonymous No.10035934]

>>10035148
The game I would pick isn't retro, sadly.

[Anonymous No.10035967]

>>10035148

[Anonymous No.10035983]

>>10035838
I don't know if you're the one defending the kjv abomination, but either way doesn't matter.

[Anonymous No.10035993]

It's a punishment, right? So for me I guess having to play the Final Fantasy games on loop. The gibbering mess that comes out of the VR torture chamber will be constantly challenging people to games of triple triad.

[Anonymous No.10035998]

>>10035148
1- a Monster Rancher game, the complexity in this series is insane.
2- a Dungeon Crawler, i would look for a one that's highly replayable not to mention dc games takes about 300 hours to 100% from what i have seen.
3- Doom level editor, i will try to make insane wads with a 1000 years experience.

[Anonymous No.10036004]

>>10035983
If you believe in God you know this place exists as test, if you can't be bothered to even start the test, never mind complete it, why do you expect a reward? Bing bing fucking wahoo.

[Anonymous No.10036019]

>>10035301
I think this is actually the correct direction! I think only creative games would last you even 100 years. Maybe fighting games or bullet hells? Possibly?

[Anonymous No.10036053]

think about how fucking good you'd be at every fucking character after 1000 years! or maybe you'd be shit because you can only play against the computer... I guess you could training mode record both sides of a battle... maybe?

[Anonymous No.10036178]

>>10036019
The Incredible Machine, right? It's been so long, but the sounds are etched into my memory, even if the sprites are not.
>>10036053
A thousand years of playing as Q. Not the worst possible choice by far.

[Anonymous No.10036251]

>>10035506
>or better something with a proper programming language included with it's editor.
personally speaking, I don't need an editor
I'll just use pen and paper to code my own editor

[Anonymous No.10036279]

Best answer so far is GT4.

>>10035998
>3- Doom level editor, i will try to make insane wads with a 1000 years experience.
This would also be good. But give me a quake editor instead. But creating maps in isolations without outside influences from other mappers, I don't think most peoples maps would be that good, even with 1000 years of experience.

[Anonymous No.10036763]

>>10035934
Post anyway

[Anonymous No.10036987]

>>10035148
Wow what amazing technology
I can't wait to see what incredible things our overlords are going to use it for!

[Anonymous No.10037010]

>>10035148
>prisoners feel as if they were serving a 1,000 year sentence
could we do that to the world's top scientists and engineers and they'd discover and invent a bunch of cool stuff in just 8 hours then?

[Anonymous No.10037016]

>>10037010
no, they would need electron microscopes and shit to carry out their work, just warping their time sense wouldn't really do much. maybe in highly abstract fields it might help.

[Anonymous No.10037021]

>>10035148
tetris

[Anonymous No.10037048]

>>10035148
I'd use this technology to give athletes and soldiers super reflexes.
i guess torturing the goy is fine too.

[Anonymous No.10037104]

>>10035148
Wasn't that a plot in Oz?

[Anonymous No.10037125]

my mind already does this for fuck sake a day feels like months

[Anonymous No.10037145]

>>10035148
>kill 500 people
>get to be imprisoned by virtual nanny state for 1000 years so the virtual taxpayers have to pay for me and I can't die
>get released 8 hours later in the real world and kill 500 people more
>repeat
Nothing personnel, civilized society. Should've kept the death penalty.

[Anonymous No.10037150]

>>10037104
It's a plot in black mirror, multiple episodes, actually.

[Anonymous No.10037171]

>>10037150
I'm pretty sure there was a Star Trek episode where Riker ended up being tossed in virtual prison too.

[Anonymous No.10037176]

>>10035148
Step 1. Drive prisoners insane in less than a day.
Step 2. Release insane ex-cons to commit more crimes.

[Anonymous No.10037179]

>>10035148
I feel like maybe the answer is something like Stardew Valley. Something with a lot of replay value that you can waste time screwing around in, but that also provides some immersion and escapism. Alternately I might have to go with a racing game like Gran Turismo just because racing games have pretty much infinite replay value for me.

[Anonymous No.10037180]

>>10037016
Does this mean I could spend 1000 virtual years fucking OP's mom?

[Anonymous No.10037193]

ez choice and id actually look forward to it

[Anonymous No.10037198]

It's a tough one, 1000 years is unimaginable thanks to our lifecycle. Not retro but probably something like Cities Skylines or EU4, where you can larp a lot of story writing alongside it and each game plays different. Retrowise, maybe GalCiv 2 where the biggest games can take months to complete, or Civ4.

>>10037150
Although a good show, black mirror did absolutely nothing original and is a bunch of stolen ideas. Brooker has always been a hack right back to when he was a not so humble kino reviewer.

[Anonymous No.10037450]

>>10035171
We must dissent.

[Anonymous No.10037468]

>>10035148
I think something like Minecraft would be good, but only because I want to see how fucking insanely huge and detailed a world would be if you spent 1,000 years on it.

Something like Gran Turismo 4 would also be good, like other people have said racing games have almost limitless replay value and GT4 has a shitload of cars and circuits. I think you would eventually get burnt out on it though, because eventually you'd get to the point where you had driven every car on every circuit hundreds of times.

Honestly I think the best option would be some type of Game Maker program (assuming those count as a game). You spend an entire year making a game, then you finish it and don't play it for 10 years. By the time 10 years has gone by, you will have forgotten everything about the game you made, so it will feel brand new. Your first decade is spent making 9 games, then on the beginning of year 10 you alternate between playing the first game you made, and making your 10th. Then, you just go on like this for the rest of the 1,000 years. You'll have a constant stream of games to play, and once your time is up you'll have 1,000 games that you can sell and be rich for the rest of your life.

[Anonymous No.10037476]

>>10035148
Mr. Driller Drill Land.
There’s enough replay ability, along with infinite versions of the attractions you unlock after beating the level 3 versions of them.
>>10035301
Great choice, love this game too.

[Anonymous No.10037558]

I think the worst thing wouldn't be the boredom, it'd be the loneliness.
I would want to pick something like Namco x Capcom or Sengoku Rance or Yu-Gi-Oh Tag Force that has a billion characters in it so I wouldn't feel so horribly alone.
I'd also really miss walking around, so a game that where you explore a 3D world would be wonderful.
Not sure what the happy medium is. Maybe something like Persona 3 FES or Final Fantasy X-2. Not sure.

If I could play all the retro games I wanted or make my own content for a game like Elona I probably wouldn't even get bored. Heck, I might even want to go back for round 2.

[Anonymous No.10038519]

[Anonymous No.10038608]

>>10035780
I feel for the meme and completed it. It's not worth the time needed to complete it. The backtracking at the beginning is unironic torture.

[Anonymous No.10038615]

Heroes of Might and Magic III

[Anonymous No.10038663]

>>10037104
I'm 4 or so episodes from finishing Oz and I just don't think I have it in me to keep on watching. Season 6 is so fucking boring.

[Anonymous No.10038732]

I'm trying to think if there's any retro games that do a half decent job of simulating social interactions, but can't really think of any.

I'm pretty sure you would need to trick your mind by having an NPC friend to talk to in order to stay somewhat sane.

[Anonymous No.10038846]

>>10035148
if i'm going to be stuck in a cell or deserted island i essentially want "forever games" which i'd consider one of the following...
>sandbox game
>multiplayer game with bots
>arcade game
>porn game

[Anonymous No.10038991]

As an ex-con, you all would be lucky if you got a tablet (and you have to buy it with your $2 an hour wage) with pokemon leafgreen on it. You can't trade with the other prisoners either, the ultimate cruelty. Pokemon was the most advanced game on it, the rest were all games that were indie games taken from those 30-in-1 bootleg famicom carts sold in Russia and elsewhere.

[Anonymous No.10038997]

>>10035148
Counts as retro now so I'd go with Final Fantasy XII. I've already put in 4000 hours since it first came out and I still replay it multiple times a year, every year. Living for 1000 years would likely have 2 effects:
First your brain develops mild dementia by at least year 80. Second, your perception of time would change due to relative lifespan (1 year to a 10 year old is 10% of their life, equivalent to 10 years for a 100 year old and a century to a 1000 year old). Because of this, time would start to pass very fast by year 200+. Days and weeks would be be meaningless and months would feel like days

Anyway, why FFXII? I would specifically pick the IZJS version which added super weapons like the Seitengrat. Assuming the PS2 and memory card will last that long, I would farm 99 Seitengrats, 99 Zodiac Spears, 99 Danjuro,etc. I'd also get perfect HP and MP (the game randomizes it on level up). This would require resetting 100s, if not 1000s of times for every level up. Normal people use RNG manipulation to do it (same with Seitengrat) but with 1000 years I could take my time and leisurely reset. I'd eventually max out gil, steps, clan rank points, have the max possible amount of items

Then I'd do it all over again because I'm a braindead retard that already does this all year every year. An alternative is Dragon Quest VIII because you can have up to 999 of any item. Farming max stats with seeds then getting 999 of each seed would be utterly insane but kinda fun. Plus I already talk to Yangus, Angelo, Jessica, and Trode in my head (as well as Vaan, Penelo, Balthier, Fran, Ashe, and Basch) because I'm a lonely autistic with no friends. And I can jack off to Penelo's tight ass and Jessica's big boobs

Alternatives:
>daggerfall (doubt you could actually explore the full thing in 1000 years)
>vanilla wow solo repack server (imagine programming your own private server core for 1000 years)
>sonic collection
>mega man collection
>time splitters 2 with map maker

[Anonymous No.10039009]

>>10038997
A man of knowledge and taste.

[Anonymous No.10039101]

And I'll never get tired of it

[Anonymous No.10039163]

>>10038608
This killed me. I played for about 5 hours and it felt like nothing at all had happened and I'd just come off Breath of Fire 4 which didn't help in highlighting how ass ugly it is. Never went back, but then don't love DQ anyways, I still regret finishing 5.

[Anonymous No.10039697]

>>10035148
>surprise buttsex some poor blue collar's wife in full view of the husband, get away with it
>"you will spend 1000 hours in jail as a punishment but in real life its actually only 8 hours muahahahah! get fucked!"
>autistically survive the 1000 years inside your mind imagining yourself playing vidyagames (or actually playing emulators because you know the sentences will be this gay) or lucid dreaming
>will not go insane because it would be considered MUH BARBARISM to do this without a way of preserving mental health
>be out in full health
>shit in front of the grieving couple's front porch who, in their perspective, saw the illegally penetrating guy leave jail the very next day after his sentence
>have infinite sex with true crime groupies who didn't even have time for their love letters to reach you in jail
>sell your story to netflix and some big name book publisher, be set for life
Ah yes... biotechnology is le based.

[Anonymous No.10040193]

>>10038991
sounds like a shit existence, what did you do? any more stories?

[Anonymous No.10040318]

>>10037558
damn, good prediction anon
too bad the effect will only last 1000 hours, not 1000 years

[Anonymous No.10040324]

starfox 2

[Anonymous No.10041143]

i guess tetris

[Anonymous No.10041145]

How is this different than stranded on an island threads

[Anonymous No.10041149]

>>10041145
you run out of batteries on an island and have to survive

[Anonymous No.10041296]

>>10041145
why does it have to be different?
put in any scenario you want anon

[Anonymous No.10041398]

>>10035148
Every game Id pick isnt retro, like Europa Universalis 4 or Sims 3 or 4.
I need something that I would only play if I had a crazy amount of free time, and those games are that.

[Anonymous No.10041401]

>>10041398
Now that I think about it, my retro answer is Sim City 4 especially if I had access to mods

[Anonymous No.10041497]

>>10037171
Actually that was O'Brian

[Anonymous No.10041585]

>>10035148
If custom modules don't count as mods I think Neverwinter Nights is probably my best pick.
If you're gonna be a sperg about it though I guess Tales of Symphonia or maybe Baldurs Gate

[Anonymous No.10041663]

>>10035148
Solitary Fitness. 1000 years is a lot and I may forget to get them gains

[Anonymous No.10041701]

>>10035148
Pong

[Anonymous No.10042529]

>>10035148
Ten years in the cubes, creep.

[Anonymous No.10043475]

>>10035148
>What do you pick?
If I had to pick retro then probably some puzzle game like Tetris or Panel de Pon
I would prefer a non-retro game though Minecraft or Terraria to be exact

[Anonymous No.10043528]

Does Unreal World count? I know it's still being updated but its initial release was in 1992

[Anonymous No.10043580]

>>10035148
>>10038846
Yep. I'd also consider some ARPG like Diablo 2 or classic puzzle games like Tetris.

[Anonymous No.10043589]

>>10035148
Super Mario Bros : The Lost Levels. It would probably take me twice that time to beat it thos.

[Anonymous No.10043751]

>>10035148
The reboot of The Outer Limits in the 90s had an episode almost identical to this. I think it was the pilot. The creator gets caught in his own machine and once he finishes his sentence and escapes hes fucked forever. I remember it really fucked me up as a kid.

[Anonymous No.10043981]

Does ToME count?

[Anonymous No.10043994]

i'm taking a DDR cabinet in and becoming the strongest man alive

[Anonymous No.10044125]

>>10035148
Seen that episode no thinks

[Anonymous No.10044143]

>>10044125
I remember that episode. Was pretty good actually. He goes in the innocent man dies and he goes to prison for it. he comes out and his view on the whole project is changed.

another good episode was the 2 scientists working on ai and the one ends up in a coma and he goes into her brain to fix it and ends up killing her coma state and leaving the ai version of her behind. was dark

[Anonymous No.10044237]

>>10035229
>>10035245
>guyz technically
God lol this is so accurate, I hate journalists. I have a friend who works for WaPo and he talks exactly like this. Personally, I’d spend the whole sentence working out in my mind like the one convict from Baki.

>>10035221
Damn right. O’Brien must suffer at least once per season.

[Anonymous No.10044418]

Her

[Anonymous No.10044645]

>>10035148
Why is burger legal system expecting people to be able to live more than 100 years in prison instead of just issuing a life sentence?

[Anonymous No.10044646]

>>10044418
She kinda hot but who is she

[Anonymous No.10044650]

>>10044645
It's not about that, but about per point sentences. It's possible for a verdict to be overturned, so that allows for the possibility of a life sentence to remain even if the accused is partially exonerated.

[Anonymous No.10044812]

>>10035148
minecraft

[Anonymous No.10044828]

>>10035148
Basic.

[Anonymous No.10046296]

>>10035148
If this technology ever worked everyone would just spend their entire lives in it for millennia and the real world would apathy into nothingness

[Anonymous No.10046301]

>>10035148
Unreal Tournament '99
>>10044812
Minecraft yourself.

[Anonymous No.10046457]

>>10046296
Maybe we are already living in such a world.

[Anonymous No.10046549]

>>10035148
the best GTA available at the time, you could overcome madness by making friends and family in there and survive for 1000 years

[Anonymous No.10046805]

>>10039101
The free duel theme is permanently burned into my memory. 420 tries on meadow mage to get this one.

[Anonymous No.10048846]

>>10039101
>1000 years is not enough time to 100% it

[Anonymous No.10048914]

>>10035212
Care to elaborate? Gonna go with good old Mario 64 here

[Anonymous No.10048946]

honestly, a porn game would be nice. something where I can customize the girls and the settings. 3D Sexvilla was alright with this, but I'd only play the game when I'm horny. the rest of the time I'm doing other stuff like watching tv, going for walks and reading books.

[Anonymous No.10050173]

>>10048946
>the rest of the time I'm doing other stuff like watching tv, going for walks and reading books.
You must be from a Scandinavian country where prisons aren't rape chambers filled with orcs.

[Anonymous No.10052169]

[Anonymous No.10052209]

I’m quite certain I could play this for about 50 years before going completely mad.

[Anonymous No.10052227]

>>10037558
Tekken 6 is and I guess technically all the games that have tekken force in them let you walk around sorta. And MKD and MKA both had konquest modes. I get what you are saying though about the loneliness, I'd probably want something with an open world and lots to see like New Vegas or maybe Saints Row or something

[Anonymous No.10052250]

>>10052227
wait I'm stupid forgot where I was teehee, New Vegas isn't retro, but it will be in 2 years, pretty sure the rest of those are though

[AБOБA No.10052570]

>>10035148
>over 100 replies
>no one mentions Dwarf Fortress
The absolute STATE of 4chinners.

[Anonymous No.10052597]

>>10035148
I actually did some time in the feds. At one point (I wanna say about 8 months or so before my release), I asked my brother to send me some FFVI materials from GameFAQs, notably the Algorithms FAQ. I spent literal months studying the materials and plugging numbers into the algorithms to work out optimal equipment setups, how to obtain the most optimal Esper bonuses, and all kinds of other shit. I'd imagine if I'd had the game in front of me as well, I'd have had enough to occupy me for a long time.

[Anonymous No.10052605]

>>10037104
It was also a plot in the 90's version of The Outer Limits, although there it was only 20 years, and the device was only on for like a minute.

[Anonymous No.10052613]

>>10038991
Sheeeit, I thought myself lucky for being able to get a shitty MP3 player with songs costing $1.66 a pop (though later on I managed to get it unblocked and filled up with a gorillion songs).

[Anonymous No.10052620]

>>10043751
I don't remember if he's mentally fucked forever, but I do remember him immediately telling everyone around him to destroy the device.

[Anonymous No.10052632]

>serving a 1000 year sentence

[Anonymous No.10053741]

>>10052597
Tell us more, Anon.

[Anonymous No.10054926]

>>10053741
Not a whole lot to tell. I did five years in all, and it was fairly uneventful since it was all in low-security facilities, where most inmates just wanna do their time and go home. I did get to witness a "war" between the Mexicans and the Dominicans, and it was a massacre in favor of the Mexicans since they outnumbered the latter like 20 to 1. We got locked down for like 2 weeks and everyone involved got transferred out. Worst part was easily when the pandemic hit, since we got locked down for months and they didn't really start easing up on the restrictions until right when I was about to be released.

[Anonymous No.10054972]

>>10035148
Hi guys, Chad here.

[Anonymous No.10055256]

>>10035148
I don't see any games or systems in that cell, son, not even a TV.

[Anonymous No.10055259]

GZDoom with GZDB and the default .wads