/vr/ - Retro Games

>>9577637
Nice try.

>that "bacon in the pan" gamefeel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9jusqUkPgQ

>>9577781
poor kirby, about to be eaten by a nigger

>>9577785
god I wish that were me

>>9577587

>>9577587
why would this ad have the US SNES model with the PAL/JAP controller?

>>9577774
Some guy at the ad agency thought "Klonoa" sounded like an STD so they just based the whole campaign on it.

>>9577820
Makes sense, you play it with your pants down after all

>>9577820
>>9577821
And the second game has an equally bad ad campaign

I love this desperate attempt at making DKC3 and the literal baby gorilla character seem edgy.

What kinds of magazines had ads like these? Do they still exist?

>>9577902
the video game kind and no they don't exist any more outside of gameinformer

>>9577587
Thread full of them from Twitter: https://twitter.com/FroshKiller/status/1543321536597196800

>>9577782
>bathroom has a crystal door
For what purpose?

>>9577902
EGM, NP, Game informer, sega visions. Playboy also had /vr/ ads even in the 90s

>>9577587

>>9577779
I fucking hate klax

>>9577932
it's a mirror

>>9577782
That's a weird place for a mirror cause you'd always have to stare at yourself on the toilet.

>>9577587
>>9577594
>>9577614
>>9577632
>>9577721
>>9577785
Why were video games so satanic back then?

>>9578005
satan is cool

>>9578023
Christ is the coolest

>>9577994
it's for playing gamecube

>>9577812
because the coon stole them

>>9578134
lol

>>9577812
Probably bought the US system and quickly realized the jap controllers are far superior. Many such cases.

>>9577632
>Uncensored ads
>Censored game

>>9577902

Look up Kijiji Warlord on eBay, bought a bunch of PSM, Gamefan and Official US PlayStation Magazines recently from them. Gamefan is by far my favorite, they use a tonne of in game screenshots and their page layouts are comfy as fuck

>>9578698
nice

>>9577832
I'm surprised this is a North American ad. Something about the art style screams UK. It definitely is NA though, with the spelling of "Mom" and the traffic light.

>>9580126
I wonder how he's pressing the D pad.

Yeah, that's right. I MASTURBATED my DICK to this ad. I beat that little fucker stupid.

https://youtu.be/BGosAHeN2l0

>>9577962
IT'S TIME

>spoils the puzzle that confounded zoomers for years

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxrACWQvzHw

Archie recommends Spanky's Quest!

Archie recommends Spanky's Quest!

Easiest way to find ads. Go to Internet Archive, type in the magazine you are looking for, and there is a good chance it may be there.

https://archive.org/details/ElectronicGamingMonthly_201902/Electronic%20Gaming%20Monthly%20Issue%20001%20%28May-June%201989%29/

Who here entered to win this? I know I did :(

>>9578448
>jap controllers are far superior.
why? isn't the only difference the button colors and x/y being concave?

>>9578005
they always were
all mainstream media always was
its more obvious than ever, but it has the opposite effect
you get the contrarians & rebels turning good

>>9578052
i always thought these ads were cool af

the voice actor is hilarious
search for the free car prank call video on youtube

wholesome

>>9580570
why are people like you even here? just stick to the Bible

Metal & Lace was a game advertisement that I would see quite often, but yet, never really tried to find. This ad is literally telling you to call them directly.

>>9580690

>>9580464
this controller was good tier. my favorite retro controller ever

>>9580646
v retarded take
educate yourself on theology brainwashed zoomer

Tommo Ad for the rare MegaJet.

>>9580730
NTA, but source on this pic? Also, the world of LOZ is not the same world as IRL. Yeah, there's mention of Real World religions and creeds throughout the games here and there, sure, but how does that mean Link is canonically a Christian just because of a player's guide drawing showing him as such? Also,
>Japanese version is called Triforce of the GODS
>The Link in LOZ 1, Zelda 2, OOT, Majora's Mask, Link's Awakening, and ALLTP/Triforce of the Gods is not the same Link you see and play as in Minish Cap, Oracle of Ages or Seasons, Wind Waker, nor Twilight Princess
Oh and where in the world is Hyrlue even said to be in? Is the Kingdom of Hyrule, Death Mountain, and the islands found in Wind Waker, and the areas of Oracle of Ages/Seasons even said to be on a fantastical version of Earth rather than differently named fantasy world?

>>9580776

>>9580867

https://ganker.com/the-christian-roots-of-the-legend-of-zelda-44004/

>>9580776

>>9580883
Hyrule was literally intended to be a medieval Christian society and the original Japanese game included the Bible. There is also the cross on Link's shield. Are you a zoomer or are you just incapable of finding basic facts

>>9580867
Hyrule was literally intended to be a medieval Christian society and the original Japanese game included the Bible. There is also the cross on Link's shield. Are you a zoomer or are you just incapable of finding basic facts

>>9580883
Eh, I sense some bitter bias here. Yes, its true that NOA and NOE during the NES years often had a bias against overt themes regarding themes and symbols of many IRL faiths and/or religions as per their pre-ESRB political correctness game censorship guidelines, which also forbade references to alcohol, illicit drug use, and, most on-screen bloodshed. However, as much as there are references to Christianity here and there, especially in the early years of the franchise, that the Cross is not an exclusively Christian symbol, just as the Six-pointed star is not exclusive to Judaism. True, the special book in the early Zelda games is literally called a "Bible", and cross imagery in a number of areas, the bulk of them in the early titles. But what makes you so damn sure that the word "Shimpu" is specifically meant to mean a Christian Priest? How fluent in Japanese are you, really? The language is often vague, its written form (aside from Kanji, which acts somewhat more like Chinese does) is a syllabary, is more reader dependent in its structure than any of the languages of Europe, and those of the Indian subcontinent, and Southeast Asia. I also add that even in the pre-Majora's mask era of LOZ, there are also other lore and folkloric beings from different parts of the world present. Fairies (Celtic and Germanic Lore) can be found in every game in the series. The Master Sword in Link to the past/Triforce of the Gods is very much reminiscent of Celtic Arthurian legend and lore. The swimming fish that raise their heads out of the water to make ranged magic ball attacks found in LOZ1 and ALTTP/Triforce of the Gods are more Japanese Kappa-inspired. Not sure about the Peahat enemies, though.

>>9577784
lmao

>>9580456
>monkey named Spanky

why cant videogames just be for cool tough guys anymore?

>>9581194
Seriously. You had to be able to afford a NEO*GEO to not be a weenie.

>>9581017
>ermmm yes I understand that you are entirely correct and that all of my arguments are BTFO but ermmm how fluent in Japanese are you anyway hmmmm also this one enemy isn't from Christianity so ermmmmm

>>9581207
immeasurably based

>>9580570
>everything around me is satanic aaargh!!
You really need to see a therapist.

>>9580134
Not insulting anybody... Well, that's until someone checks the dictionary, see that marrano is also a old slur for jews (The kind of thing you after certain strategy games), and the ADL gets out of the cave

>>9580509
I thought about it every time I saw the ad (especially whenever they changed it to be whatever new consoles were available), but even as a kid I just sort of instinctively knew it was some kind of scam.

>>9580648
Most probably the 18+ version was not easy to find in stores, hence the direct sale thing (same thing with Cobra Mission). I have the big box version of the 13 year (censored) one, but I haven't seen the original yet;

>>9580730
t. Yet another triggered fag that derives his theology from paganism and his sodomite clergy rather than from the Bible (ie, from Christ & His Apostles).
>Ephesians 2:8-10

>>9577614
Nice

>>9577785
>>9580690
>>9580691
I need more ads like these which praise the game's difficulty to shut up zoomies who think games were hard "because of rentals"

>>9578782
Capejoy?

>>9581345
>I thought about it every time I saw the ad (especially whenever they changed it to be whatever new consoles were available), but even as a kid I just sort of instinctively knew it was some kind of scam.

This ad appeared in so many different western video game magazines. EGM, Game Pro, Game Fan, Ultimate VideoGames, etc. I'm pretty sure it ended up in a few comic books as well. This ad would get run all the time in Magazines. I can't tell you how many times I saw it and had the urge to just cut it out and send it in. I think I may have done it at least once.

>>9582243
>I need more ads like these which praise the game's difficulty to shut up zoomies who think games were hard "because of rentals"

that ad came out of a 1990 issue of Computer and VideoGames.

>>9581347
>Most probably the 18+ version was not easy to find in stores, hence the direct sale thing (same thing with Cobra Mission). I have the big box version of the 13 year (censored) one, but I haven't seen the original yet;

I love that one of the requirements is Windows 3.1. But yeah, it's one of those games that I would see advertisements for, but never really knew anything about it. It was a mild hentai fighting game, that would have probably not been sold on many computer store shelves, and something you would have to order directly video the phone number. The game looks like a a pretty jank 2D fighting game. It reminds me of Rise of the Robots in some way, but this game does have cash prizes and weapon/ armor upgrades.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oUq97IpV0Q

>>9583548
>This ad appeared in so many different western video game magazines. EGM, Game Pro, Game Fan, Ultimate VideoGames, etc. I'm pretty sure it ended up in a few comic books as well. This ad would get run all the time in Magazines. I can't tell you how many times I saw it and had the urge to just cut it out and send it in. I think I may have done it at least once.

Here's a different version of that ad from an 1996 issue of Next Generation, this one features a PS1, Saturn, Virtual Boy and a Windows 95 PC. For as long as this went on, you never really heard stories of people winning these.

>>9577587
give it back, jamal

>>9581242
you really need to post on-topic and learn to accept objective reality
there are signs of the supernatural all around you


the anti-christian (brainwashed) sentiment is literally what an edgy 13 year old would have as their worldview anon

>>9580867
the BIBLE IS IN THE FAMICOM GAME

not because link is canonically christian
its just imagery associated with "good vs evil" and the devs thought it was badass

>>9583630
It was a Bernie Madoff type thing, the guy was barely making ends meet because the money he made off his last contest would barely cover the ad bills for the next one.

>>9577594
Are there any other videogames where you play as Adam Sandler?

>>9583658

>>9583658
>It was a Bernie Madoff type thing, the guy was barely making ends meet because the money he made off his last contest would barely cover the ad bills for the next one.

Interesting. I wonder how long this ran for? My guess, 1993 to 2000? It's one of those bizarre staples that was common in mid to late 90's western gaming magazines, like Chips and Bits, or Tomo ads.

>>9583694
we actually had this during its peak
it was comfy

>nobody posted the goat

This FF7 ad was savage

>>9583823
?????

>>9578698
I love Nick Fury poking out the side there.

>>9577902
They used to be in comic books among others.

>>9583823
>>9583839
keep posting good ADS

>>9582243

>>9584885

now compare this art to the western one for the same game

Double page ad

>>9580695
I don't think I've ever seen a gologo ad, it's still off to me that america got a gologo game on nes.

>>9584907

>>9580210
I'm sure I did too, probably why I remember thinking kim basinger was attractive. Need to find this on DVD,

>>9580615
I think I still have that handheld somewhere

>>9584950
F yeah, blaster master is great. Did my first play through, really enjoyed it.

>>9584901
great art indeed, at that time

by mid 98

>leggit

>>9582243

>>9585904
Code breaker is hard to find these days in its GBC and GBA versions, I think.

>>9577587
>Don't worry, we won't tell

Yikes. Red flag.

>>9584962
What does the protect switch do?

>>9585993
A buddy at work has been getting me hyped on azure dreams, anyone play it? I'd love to have that Konami collection series, that cart is stacked.

>>9585896
That one's just sad.

>>9585896
what a time!

>>9586105
it protec

>>9586105
cuts input i would imagine

>>9577994
Comb your hair while taking the morning shit. It's a time saver.

>>9580512
Jap controllers also have shorter cords.

>>9578698
>is a marvel character
>instead of using official art they hired a bad cover artist...

>retro /vr/ ads
>basically every post is "xtreme 90s raditude" era stuff
y tho?

>>9578005
Because the satanic panic was still lingering and the target audience was teens who loved how much their parents hate "all these nintendos and computer games that are so violent"
You will also notice that most of the edgy ads were made before Columbine.

Not really an ad, but a mag cover that I believe the younger people refer to as "aesthetic" these days.

Not just "gold box" AD&D computer adaptations, although that's what anyone is going to remember them for.

Right around a year before Microsoft would buy the company just to get this title, and forever be erroneously remembered as its creator.

Right around a year before Microsoft would buy the company just to get this title, and forever be erroneously remembered as its creator.

>>9578698
'jak him

This game didn't really deserve the reputation it got. A combination of a shitty NES port and equally shitty youtuber eceleb takes have pretty much ensured it's never going to get a fair chance at anyone's playtime going foward. Which is a pity.

>>9577973
that's not better

Much in the same way SSI will always be remembered for D&D games despite their incredible body of work over the lifetime of the company, so too will Epyx only ever be remembered as the folks who did that slick PC port of Rogue.

Games so good, the company literally guarantees you at least one mental illness after a single play session.

>>9588076
thanks for posting, anon

Finally a title meant for the gamer demographic that had a precisely 0% chance of ever touching a pussy outside of their own births.

the 5th gen god of war

>>9588116
yw, anon

One of the best parts of having gamed through the Atari Age was seeing artwork that, in a slightly different world, would have probably ended up as a Boston album cover.

dynasty warriors the biggest fighting game franchise.

It's hard to say no to a piece of equipment that Benjamin "Hawkeye" Pierce is selling you.

You don't actually have to put on an official SSI-branded wifebeater before mounting your giant flying eagle and setting off on a legendary quest to destroy evil in a far-away fantasy world, but it certainly helps.

You normally have to pay the girl extra for a Stickybear Basketbounce.

>>9578052

totally not street of rage

>>9588189

>>9588198
nice one

the x-files was a huge tv series from the 90s.

Look, all I'm trying to say is that maybe, just maybe, the series might have caught on with an international audience if you'd actually given them more than two titles.

>>9588234
that illustration is top notch

Despite video games having always been the purvey of violence, sometimes graphic in its depiction, it's good to know that there were actually some companies out there making stuff that the whole family could enjoy.

Whise senpai yo ghwave.

>>9588267
now this is some peak 90s edge. Imagine the fucking reaction if an ad like this came out today.

>>9588295
Holy crap that color scheme.

>>9588228
oh shit I remember this game

>>9588267
>>9588295
I don't get it.

How can we top the double page ads we did for DQ3?

Double double page ad I guess!

>>9588580

>>9588580
>>9588582

>>9588580
>>9588582
>>9588583

>>9588207
I remember playing the demo for this and scratching my head why salted meat was a healing item

>>9588269
Kamille from z gundam infiltrates the women room with success

>>9588437
woman loses it over men playing soccer game all the time all the year

>>9580960
You use the Bible to make a magic wand more powerful.

It's less that its suppose to explicitly be a Christian themed game and more that Western Fantasy is cliched to have Christian Stuff in it in Japanese media. Like how Kung-Fu movies have Shaolin Monks and Buddhist temples, but you wouldn't be stupid enough to say that they're suppose to factually represent Buddhism.

>>9580570
It's a bit ironic you see satan in advertisements for games yet post on an image board site famous for spreading gore and cp.

>>9588224
>>9588226
https://youtu.be/g1I71ElQjMM

>>9578005
How do you get current day retarded republicans upset about something to confuse them? You double down on their current confusion of basic things like science and math and not raping kids.

Same thing for ads. You get free screen time when you are edgy and can get an entrenched base pissy at you.

>>9589384
Pretty sure drag time homo hour doesn't have anything to do with science or math

For some reason I got the urge to attempt a remake of that EGM2 ad of Sonic 3D Blast/Vectorman 2. It helps that the fonts are easy to find.

>>9581035
I love how they embraced the polygons back then.

Also https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1673302074220779.webm

>>9589543
What is that 90s grungy ass drug PSA font called?

>>9589476
excuse me but what does ranting in your car about age of consent have to do with family values

Pixel Ripped 1995: On the Road
seen it a couple of times

>>9578005
because technology is inherently satanic

>>9590105
>because technology is inherently satanic
now that you mention it, computers do come from the tree of knowledge, rather than the tree of life

>>9589586
"Confidential." A pretty popular font back then. I saw another SEGA ad in this thread with it too.

>>9588262
All of a sudden the Blur song: Park Life is stuck in my head.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSuHrTfcikU

>>9577936
I get a strange, happy feeling whenever Kasumi says "Anata ni watashi wa taosenai!".
I don't really understand why I like it so much.
I think it just makes me happy to know that no matter what happens in the world or how messed up my life gets, Kasumi will always be around and she'll always say that line.

>>9577637
years later and it still hurts that the sequel was cancelled

>>9585923
For a second I thought this was an ad for Sonic '06.

>>9591281

>>9577587
Picture doesn't make sense because he could just be playing on his SNES instead of garbage Gameboy shovelware

>>9577784

Still one of my favs.

It's subtle, it's funny and it's very clever.

>>9577594
>So Adam, how is this socially awkward outburst-prone manchild with the high voice different from your other characters?
>well you see this one talks out of the side of his mouth

>>9581207
They were 100% correct that the Neo Geo brutally mogged every other console at the time in terms of hardware. But that didn't matter because nobody cold afford the thing.

It may have been the Ferrari of game consoles, but how many people do you know with Ferraris?

I remember seeing this ad all the time

>>9592231
nice, more stuff like this

>>9589148
Kek.

>>9592231
It's funny that ad follows Chrono Trigger's Japanese marketing of emphasizing how much amazing stuff went into the game. It even cites Toriyama's character designs which nobody would care about for another two to three years before anyone in America because DBZ hadn't hit yet.
Meanwhile the TV commercial was just the Japanese commercial with gag subtitles.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYQeITtzRl0

>>9593115
> It even cites Toriyama's character designs which nobody would care about for another two to three years before anyone in America because DBZ hadn't hit yet.

jRPG fans in the US would have played Dragon Warrior 1 to 4 so it's not completely senseless

>>9593129
Those US release of those games tried to scrub away as much Toriyama as they could.

>>9578437
>unironically haing Jesus
>not feeling indifferent but hating
Jewish or trans?