/vr/ - Retro Games

You sick twisted fuck.

Very.

A lot.

>Silver Knight from Dark Souls
So I just have to parry it with a cast iron pot lid, and riposte with... hrm. A screwdriver? A drill bit? I don't have any particularly good knives bigger than a steak knife. Outlook maybe okay.

Worst he can do is poke me a few times.

Crocomire's revenge

>>820259
so weird, I just discovered that on youtube in japanese yesterday.. so weird

Phew.

>>820252

I am so fucked!

semi-fucked

Maybe I could smash one of those with a chair or something.

Oh god I am so fuc- waitaminute how are these coming after me that doesn't even make sense

>>820507
The floor is now la-- SPIKES! You can't touch it for the rest of the day, anon, OR YOU'LL DIE!

>>820507
What's the name of that game?

>>820527
Spelunky.

http://spelunkyworld.com/original.html

>>820527
spelunky

>>820530
>>820535
Thanks, it is appreciated.

I'm fine

Op, why did you have to tell him? WHY?

>>820548

just shoot it until it dies you will be ok

>>820116
NO!

This is blatant /v/ shit

Welp.

>>820569
>implying he was ever dead

motherfucking timer.

i hope i got a few minutes left befo-

I just killed the boss Ghoul in Ghoul's Forest 3. I'm so fucked.

>>820637
That feel when you get killed by that thing for the first time.

Scarred for life.

>>820637
No, the last thing that killed YOU.

The Mob Gang from RCR? I might have a goddamn chance. Fuck me sideways if I can't get a good weapon in time, though.

Guys, let's talk about Zelda games. Cuz that's the only motherfucking retro game that matters right? ZELDA ZELDA ZELDA welcome to /ZELDA/
ZELDA GENERAL
POST ZELDA
HEY LET'S HEAR ABOUT PEOPLE'S FUCKING THEORIES ON THE TIMELINE OF ZELDA
OR HIDDEN MEANINGS IN MAJORA'S MASK AWWWW YEEEEAH GONNA BE A GOOD FOURTEEN HUNDREDTH ZELDA THREAD TODAY

>>821203
And then theres this faggot

>>821219
The thread hadn't moved in 20 minutes. Just doing my part.

>>821236
>20 minutes
It took four hours for someone to make the first reply to this thread. Learn to be patient.

>>821267
I can't. I'm Italian.

I'm fucked.

Oh man, I don't know

Dargslan armies in Imperium Galactica. Looks like I'm gonna be ok, as it's not the 4th milennium right now and they are probably just in their iron age atm. I guess if they believe you the information this implies will give them a huge edge over humanity in the future but meh, I'll probably be long dead.

The golem from Star Fox 64. OH GOD NO.

It was one of Salvatore's guard from Fallout 2.
>he got a lucky crit with his laser pistol
>I had enough stims to heal back to full but he was so close to dying that I didn't feel like it would be worth it to waste them

>>821307
I suffer a similar fate as you. I think I might be worried since I can't jump high enough to land on it.

The last thing I killed was a Clicker in The Last of Us.
I think you would be the one who is fucked considering the attack anything that makes noise.

>>820592
it's summer.

>Do you mean last thing that killed you in a retro game? Or do we include non retro too?
>>820543
It's a good game. It's better on the 360. I also heard that the newer version might be coming to PC soon.

>>822689
No, the last thing that killed YOU.

What kind of fucked?

>>822683
Then jump on a chair or truck bed or anything else that can support your weight first. Have you learned nothing from video games?

It's a Piranha Plant. I think I'll be fine.

>>822725
First the best kind.
Then the bad kind.

There would be no deviation from the image.

I don't think there's anywhere to hide

>>821295
How the fuck do you die to him? or anything really in Earthbound

It's as dumb as a rock, but it can take a rocket to the face without stopping and it has infinite ammo, so it's all down to whether it gets stuck on a wall or something.

Berserker from Final Fantasy 3.
Level of fucked: 0

I hate you.

>>820480
The enclave has armor like the Brotherhood of Steel?

I killed an ostrich egg. I think I'm good.

>>820553
Obligatory.

>>822770
I underestimated the sickness status the first time around and got rekt because of that.

Some weird fucking pink thing in Legend of the Mystical Ninja.

>> Some random ass small fry enemy from Super Metroid.
Yep time to get my bug spray.

>One of the hellhounds from Blood

I'd be more scared if I didn't have a 20-gauge and a .22 rifle sitting by the door

>Shot to death by a girl in a joke ending of an old-school H-game
>Because I raped her
This won't end well

>Yamato from Streets of Rage 3

oh fuck

It was some monster from Zelda 2. Can't remember which.

Jokes on him, it was a lucky shot that he got me and I'm better armed at home than just the pistol I had in game. And honestly he's less of a threat than the zombieman or shotgun zombie would be in real life since his bitchass fireballs go maybe 15 miles an hour.

So I'm pretty good.

>>820548

I'm truly sorry for your lots.

>>820116
Random critter from Banjo Kazooie.

Hmm..
Modern Game, that would be a Facehugger. (I was playing SS13 and I whacked one I found in the mines with a pick. Possibly, I could handle that with my club next to the computer.)

"Retro" style shit... The last miniboss before Tiamat in La-Mulana. Yeah, I'm straight fucked in that case. It's a dragon thing that breathes fire and frigging laser beams.

>>821307
Let's keep in mind the fact that if you touch it anywhere except being able to leap high enough to stomp on it's head you're fucked

All it has to do
Is touch
Your leg
And ur fuked

Those rabbits from the beginning of Secret of Mana

G-guess I'll just kick it a bit

>>824589
unless you're big
or your head has more than one pie slice in it

>>824589
But Mario punches them in 64

>>824598

I'd pay to see a live action mario movie where goombas literally stomp the shit out of a big city

Like, just brushing past humans and blowing off their legs and arms and stuff just for dramatic game-to-reality effect, expect to see a few kids get blown up aswell due to not being as strong and experienced as mario, the protagonist

it just seems like if mario's so experienced in getting hit by goombas and he can still die after a few hits then a regular human would get royally fucked up by touching one

that's just my view on the subject, even if it's some crappily made fan movie i'd still like to see it

>>824617
Get a hold of those guys that made the Sonic and Mega Man fan movies.

FUCK.

Well, I guess it's sort of an honor having the king of gods coming after you personally but... FUCK.

Worst part'll be after I'm dead and he asks if I wanna fight him again. Okay, second worst part.

>The biker in Hotline Miami

fuck.

>dem tentacley zombies in the mansion in RE0
I'm fucked.

>>824678
saw this on the 4chan homepage. wondered "why?"

Why'd you post a fucking pylon? faggot

>>821307
how'd u post one pic, but the thumbnail is diff than the pic itself?

fucking nazis

>>820116
>/b/-tier thread.

/vr/, what the fuck is happening to you?