/vr/ - Retro Games

Possibly. I bet they marketed these for Sunday school and youth groups.

>>6762861
Yes, as a kid my parents were very christian and weren't on board with some of the games. I got a NES for christmas a long with I think it was the noah ark one and funnily enough kid icarus

>>6762861
dipshit parents

>>6762861
The main problem with religious retro games was that they ended up unlicensed with a lack of gameplay polish and often sugarcoated the religious content, like so many other sunday school merchandise that skip the Book of Revelations.

>>6762861
Religious people are really weirdos.
The strict religious niggers didn't even like their kids reading harry potter because it has witchcraft in it

>>6762945
*Revelation. The added s is a typical sign of a fart-huffing attention whore retard who has never read even the first page, which explains why it's a single revelation and not multiple ones.

>>6762861
I want that cartridge's rom dump.

>>6762861
spiritual warfare was pretty good

>>6762968
I've always wanted to buy a copy, I should bite the bullet and do it. It's $50 on their website, with the disclaimer that it has a bug and one game is unplayable...

>>6762861
These were sold through Christian Reading Rooms and other Christian chain stores around the USA. It was its own little distribution network. They still are.

>>6763008
What still are, NES games?

>>6763026
No, that Christian reading rooms and bookstores are still there own little distribution network that anyone not tuned into that world wouldn't know anything about.

>>6762949
Fuck you coomer. Non-religious people are weirdos.

>>6763028
>tfw you'll never go into a Christian bookstore and pick up a copy of Law Enforcement's guide to satanic cults

>>6763029
Figures that the faggot posting coomer shit in every thread is a retard.

>>6762921
Nice

Bible Adventures for NES is most righteous as well as Spiritual Warfare for the Genesis. Yes my son, there was an audience for such games. People used to be generally more religious.

>>6762921
Did they let you play DOOM?

>>6762945
Or Song of Solomon, that gets skipped a lot. I remember my minister grandfather and my grandma arguing about that during Bible study a few nights, since she was a prude but he had written multiple commentaries on it and wanted to share. Those were fun times, she also got upset every time one of us read a verse with the words "piss" or "ass" in them. My grandpa was and is a pretty chill guy, used to give my sister and I Pokemon stuff when grandma wasn't looking.

>>6763037
it's funny that, considering you need to be christian to believe in satan in the first place
satanic cults are necessarily christian

>>6762861
It's really odd to me that nobody has had the balls to actually make a proper game targeting whatever religious. Kind of like "The You Testament" but actually accurate seems like the kind of thing that would have a very niche but consistent market.

>>6763037

https://youtu.be/NBf35HS6atU

>>6763202
Their depiction of Satan looks like the Amerimutt.

>>6762949
Stfu atheist cuck. Bet you’re a “I fucking love scieeeennncccceee.” Reddit type. Who tf would want their kids to be into witchcraft besides “I fucking love scieeeennncce” idiots.

>>6763029
Coomers must be hung

>>6763226
More like a jew. Kinda based ngl

>>6763239
Fundamentalist Christians loves Jews and Israel.

>>6763029
Based

>>6763167
You know Muslims believe in Satan too?

>>6763252
Which is crazy because costal kikes look down on them.

I went to an evangelical religious school growing up and there was/is definitely a market for them. I’m glad i got away from that cult. People who are deeply religious are creepy as fuck and they believe the earth really is only 5000 years old. They’re also rude as fuck to anyone who even shows the slightest difference to them.

>>6762861
IRL Ned Flanders-types

ITT: stinky, angry, effeminate boomers trying to 1-up each other with misery

Everyone knows in Sunday School you always fall asleep when the teacher is reading the Bible except during the violent or sexy parts.

>>6762949
>Religious people are really weirdos.
Religious people are the default in life. They're objectively not the weirdos - you and your parents are.

>>6762964
Geeze who shit in your cereals?

>>6764612
Most people aren’t very intelligent either and it’s there’s strong evidence that the more religious a society, the worse off it is

>>6764612
Ok boomer

>>6762949
I wouldn't like my kid reading harry potter because of the very high chance they wouldn't read anything else and become a democrat.

>>6763302
>You know Muslims believe in Satan too?
Its more or less the same religion, just with extra characters and extended lore.

>>6766341

>>6763028
I went to a church thrift store, and they had a whole series of 'the bible in minecraft' books for kids. crazy stuff

>>6764632
>there’s strong evidence that the more religious a society, the worse off it is
Do you mean you're planning on committing suicide, then? There's a strong correlation between nihilism and suicide.

>>6762861
I knew a kid who had Joshua. He played other, non-religious games, too, so I don't know. My guess was they were compromise games, where parents thought they were giving their kid something educational/spiritually beneficial, and the kid got a videogame. I doubt too many kids on their own specifically wanted a religious NES game, unless it were all they were allowed or they were simply intrigued by seeing a videogame for sale in a Christian goods store.

Joshua was pretty fun, at least.

>>6763202
5:36 Me and my /vr/ friends are Satanic fags, pretty cool.

>>6762861
>dumb parents give money to a secular company that reskins bad games with a bible theme
>kids play them instead of good games, associate Christianity with shitty games
>they learn to hate Jesus, get a sex change operation on their 18th birthday
"Bible" games are clearly made by the devil aka Demon Dan

>>6766447
>the bible in minecraft

https://www.bridgebookshop.co.uk/bible-stories/the-unofficial-bible-for-minecrafters-by-christopher-miko-garrett-romines

gotta say, you have to give credit to these guys, this certainly beats the minecraft jokebook by a wide margin.

>>6762949
at least it wasn't D&D

>>6764612
then why did iceland declare religion a mental illness?

>>6767560
>appeal to authority fallacy
Don't you have some whale to simp for at the moment, fatty?

Sure. Doom, Castlevania. Religion's pretty cool.

I actually kind of wish games based on religion were more in vogue. I want more El Shaddai's.

>>6762861
There's a religious alternative to damn near everything. Parents and grandparents will buy those because having a cross on something matters more to them than the product's quality.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNik8niSrrY

>>6762861
Yes, my parents bought some.

>>6767620
You're appealing to the ad populum fallacy.

>>6762861
Since Wisdom Tree still exists today I say yes.

>>6763229
>be into witchcraft
What does that even mean? Run around with a stick and make up spells for a week, then give up because it doesn't work?
Is this what christians are afraid of?

>>6767685
>tu quoque fallacy
Bud, you're still looking like a fat faggot.

>>6762861
Yes. Retro games make kids into satan worshipers so many kids played their devil games religiously.

>>6767785
upvote

>>6762949
If you watched/read Harry Potter, you're a fucking faggot.

>>6767779
Guess what bro? You just used the fallacy fallacy so go eat a bag of dicks, fucker

>>6767862
>no u, you used fallacies, too!
>you want me to explain my accusations? ha! tough luck kid
Ok fatty.

>>6767873
Be responsible for your actions for once in your pathetic life

>>6767884
>child!
sóyface.jpg

>>6762949
Harry Potter convinced a generation of stupid, fat, white women that they actually could do magic and now they unironically LARP as witches

>>6762949
I see people say this, but I knew some Jehovah's Witnesses and they told me about how they read Harry Potter and had Pokemon themed parties and stuff.

>>6767991
then they clearly weren't very good witnesses of jehovah

I never understood what the difference is between being religious and being a brainwashed retard in a cult.

>>6768065
EDIT: Wow, thanks for the gold, kind stranger!

>>6768065
Average shitlib

>>6766486
Speaking of correlations, the lower IQ someone is the more likely they are to be religious

>>6769086
how do you measure religiosity?

>>6769086
Complete horseshit. Go talk to a priest, not a guitar church youth pastor, a fucking 4 year seminary priest. Let us know if 97% "Religiosity", whatever the fuck that is, correlates to 65 homeless crack addicted nigger-tier IQ

>>6769086
Drumpf is finished!

>>6769136
>Complete horseshit. Go talk to a pedophile, not to a guitar church youth pastor, a fucking 4 year seminary pedophile. Let us know if 97% "Religiosity", whatever the fuck that is, correlates to 65 homeless crack addicted nigger-tier IQ
What did sodomite mean by this?

>>6767623

Yeah and don't those Ghouls 'n Ghosts 'n Goblins 'n Geists games have you fighting Satan a lot of the time? And ActRaiser makes a God character seem like a pretty cool guy.

>>6769125
0 or 1 I guess

>>6769145
>say pedophile, that'll show'em!
Terrified.

>>6769086
Now do it for race

>>6769136

Something tells me that the "mean IQ" among ALL highly religious people is juuuuust a bit lower than the mean IQ among trained religious scholars.

>>6769163
Something tells me that your unsourced graph is shit

>>6769160
What was that, boylover?

>>6769163
Yeah? You think trained religious scholars would fit into the upper 90s of whatever "Religiosity" means?
>"mean IQ" among ALL highly religious people
There are over a billion practicing Catholics on the planet, I expect with a population sample of that size their IQ distribution would follow a bell curve, same as any other population.

>>6769191
Still aren't rustling my jimmies my guy, know why? I'm not a Catholic.
>you'd have to be a religious wackadoo to call bullshit on a made-up graph
>this is the power of fedora athiest high IQ

>>6769194
Most Catholics are low IQ and non-white and do absolutely anything their kiddyfucker leaders tell them, regardless of what it is. If Satan was appointed pope, they would outright make devotions and sacrifices to Moloch.

>>6769210
I see you're familiar with Pope Bergoglio

>>6769204
You are gay, regardless.
>my guy
Example B.

>>6769217
That's John Paul II, not Francis. The differences are minor, though.

>>6769210
>non-white
If a distribution shows evidence of low-IQ this has far more to do with it than a respondents "Religiosity"

>>6769232
Very possible. Notwithstanding, Catholicism is Muslim/brainlet-tier because of its mindless inconsistencies.

>>6767227
Logistically, Minecraft Noah has such an easier job.

>assumes Religiosity = Catholic for whatever dumb reason
All those drooling retard Shinto better quit praying to their forest spirits if they want to be smart like me

>>6769239
The spic above said "Go to a priest" in order to own the obese fedora. Unless you were referring to the Biblical doctrine of the "priesthood of all believers", Catholicism is usually what is being to referred to by that.

>>6769258
>Catholics are the only religion with priests
Get a load of this ultra-believer

>>6769262
>pedantic goalpost moving
Get a load of this desperation.

>>6769273
>97% Religiosity detected

>>6769125
How much time a person spends practicing or participating in belief activities and polling them about how important religion is to them.
As well as being lower IQ, religious people are also much more likely to be more poor.

>>6762861
My next door neighbor had Spiritual Warfare. I had fun playing it.

Once, I asked if they wanted to borrow Crystalis. They asked if it had demons in it as their parents wouldn't allow it. I remember being slightly dumbfounded, thinking "what does it matter? Demons aren't real". They didn't borrow Crystalis.

>>6769285
Cool, now do Utah.

>>6764591
Sneeds is actually the shittiest fucking joke ever. So because it used to be chucks the products must have also rhymed with his name. God damn the jews were reaching when they wrote that one.

>>6769296
The Pope is worth $30 million. What's your point? you can't just cherry pick small pieces of data that don't mean anything, you have to look at overall trends.

>>6769276
>you're stupid because I don't like you
I'M PICKLE RICK is just too high IQ for me to understand, I admit.

>>6769303
>Population of 3 million doesn't mean anything
I'll do it for you
GDP per capita: $50,577
Average IQ: 101

Must be all those athiest Mormons bringing the numbers up.

>>6769302
It's a joke that has to be explained, hence why it's popular with and associated with reddtors.

>>6769286
>cant have games with demons
>has a game literally full of demons

>>6769315
Let's do just the whites
Utah:
White $83,026
Oosh, IQ data isn't available, must be problematic

>>6767623
>Doom
To this day still the best Christian game ever created. Going around killing escaped Hell's demons to save Earth and humanity from death and damnation. Good shit.

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1088868313497266?journalCode=psra
Yikes.

>>6769125
"We coded whether the religiosity measure involved beliefs, frequency of church attendance and/or
prayer, or participation/membership in religious organizations. A “mixed” category included studies that reported correlations for more than one type of religiosity measure"
http://emilkirkegaard.dk/en/wp-content/uploads/The-Relation-Between-Intelligence-and-Religiosity-A-Meta-Analysis-and-Some-Proposed-Explanations.pdf

>>6763115
Not him, but I was a preteen and played Doom with no problems, but I guess I told my dad they're aliens, not demons.

>low IQ is associated with religiosity because all religions are the same
Um. Yikes. Now excuse me while I go cry watching the new Star Wars trailer and endlessly consoom NES merchandise.

>>6769376
>scientists aren't accounting for there being different religions
Yikes.
"Participants’ religions were coded as Protestant, Catholic, “Christian” (a term that often went undifferentiated in the studies), Jewish, or unspecified. For each religion, a study was coded as “all” (90% or more) or “mostly” (more than 50%)."
"We coded race according to four
categories: Mostly Caucasians, all Caucasians, African Americans, and mixed or not available."

>>6769372
>Zuckerman
>Silberman
Every fucking time

>>6762861
Christian parents I suspect, but don't tell them that their kids Nintendo is Japanese, they'll blow a gasket. They don''t want their kids playing with toys made by soulless non Christian heathen nips, can't trust those sneaky nips after pearl harbor. Probably try to brainwash them into taking up arms against gods country the USA.

Or some shit like that.

I had a friend as a kid who's parents where super religious and didn't let him play video games because they were satanic mind rot and even told me Asians are soulless and will burn in Hell. We would just go to my house and play my Sega.

>all this straw-man, fedora circlejerking
Boomers truly are manchildren.

>>6769410
ok boomer

>>6769319
It pisses me off of course it's from when the show had already went downhill. If he sells it to some injun named bear does it become bears fear and sear? Like fuck it just pisses me off so much I wanna kill the simp sons writer who thought that shit was clever.

>>6769372
3 random uncredentialed Jews with totally not a thousands year old axe to grind write a paper for the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, Inc., whatever the fuck that is, and because they know how to use Latex to make a document sciency-looking you believe what they have to say?

>>6769439
You forgot the part about making fun of folks for being low-IQ and religious, while citing a religious tome

>>6769439
There's literally 7 pages with dozens of citations each. There's a lot more than 3 people involved dumbass.
But yeah I'm sure the opinion of an angry religious person on this site who doesn't even understand how research works or what he's looking at is a lot more reliable.

>>6769459
>social psychology
The hardest of sciences, only facts need apply here buster

>>6769459
Believing 3 Jews without any oversight didn't cherry pick which studies to cite and include in their paper is called faith, anon.

>>6769340
We tried to use arguments like this on our parents, but they had 2 counter-arguments they refused to budge from:
1. The Satanic imagery in the game had to be created and implemented by the people who made the game, which is wrong to do. Simply having media with occult imagery can invite Satan and demonic forces into your life by normalizing such content.
2. Showing that demons can be dispatched with man-made weaponry minimizes the "very real" existential threat that demonic forces pose to both individuals and humanity at large. It programs you to let your guard down and believe that you don't need God to combat Satanic influences. It promotes a Godless, humanistic view toward spiritual matters and makes you more vulnerable to further evil influence.

Color Dreams put out those Christian games chiefly as a way around NOA's legal arm. NOA would threaten retailers who carried unlicensed NES games, but these titles were carried at Christian bookstores most of the time and even Nintendo, as lawsuit-happy as they are, weren't going to risk the PR backlash of going after Christian bookstores.

>>6762861
This is really interesting. I'm going to try to these games out. Any other religious retro games?

>>6763037
The short section on that from Surviving Edged Weapons is a million times better. 10/10 material.

>>6769580
I had this piece of shit when I was a kid. My grandmother was trying to be sweet, so I can't be too upset about it, but I learned from an early age the danger of unlicensed Nintendo games.

>>6769619
https://youtu.be/8ujwEwOQkLo?t=1620
Seriously the whole thing must be watched but this section is gold

>>6769635
I just got that one. I'm going to try it later, hehe.

>>6763167
You are fucking retarded.
Jew believe in satan too as well as muslim but they just call him another name.

they only did mediocre scotformers
I am no fan of RPGs, but one full of biblical shit could have had potential

>>6762861
Seeing how these games actually did sell copies, I would say there was. As for that collection, we all know that shit is being made only because youtubers like AVGN gave them a new sense of popularity.

>>6769895
Throw some shrimp on the barbie mate how about them sheilas

>>6769895
Deep lore gnostic RPG, now that would be the shit.

I never had any of these specific ones, but I had a multicart with Menace Beach, the game that was converted into Sunday Funday and i thought it was a good game but was very tough.

>>6769658
Holy shit lol