/vr/ - Retro Games

NES front loading cartridges.

>controllers


>stolar


>x is best looking console


>sonic adventure games arent good


>sm64


>why didnt the dc/saturn succeed?


>kino


>mini console hacks


>psx


>zoomer


>off topic game from youtuber


>emulation

>>6608628
Make the cord two feet long. Pause button on the console itself.

instead of any video out ports it has a built-in projector

>controllers


>stolar


>x is best looking console


>sonic adventure games arent good


>sm64


>why didnt the dc/saturn succeed?


>kino


>mini console hacks


>psx


>zoomers


>off topic game from youtuber


>emulation

>>6608628
Dual CPU with random amount of helper chips. LOL

>>6608779
die fgt

>>6608632
>prone to failure easily breakable vhs tape style mechanism to make the cart read absolutely nothing can even go kinda wrong
diabolical evil

>>6608628
here a few of my ideas for worst console:

1) single speed optical disc drive like the neo geo cd so that way the load times are absolutely unbearable

2) the snes processor so if more than 4 enemies are on screen at once the game will slow down and chug and the 4th enemy blinks in and out of existence

3) the dreamcast controller because the way the handles curve inward is really uncomfortable and the cable comes out the bottom of the controller for extra annoyance

4) the genesis sound chip because it was complicated to modulate to make your own sounds on so only a few games will actually have good music and sound effects while most lazy sound teams just use GEMS program that all the western devs used hence why western genesis games all sounded like shit and genesis got the reputation of being a fart machine

5) RF video signal only and can’t be RGB modded

6) no disc protection at all like the PC-FX so everyone can just burn discs pirate games and it’ll scare devs away from wanting to make games for your console so your library will suck ass

7) weird native aspect ratio that isn’t 4:3 like nes so that way all your games look stretched and circles are ovals and all sprites look short and fat

there you go, the most evil console ever, forged by satan himself

>>6608656
evil, I like it

>>6608797
Pretty much. The one we got for Christmas of 87 was having trouble making contact within a couple years.

>>6608779
lol

Bubsy serves as the console’s unofficial mascot, like Crash for the PSX and Sonic for the Genesis. Bubsy 3D is a launch title, and the rest of the library consists of sports games, arcade ports, and other D-Tier Mascot platformers. It’s also backwards compatible with the Atari Jaguar and nothing else.

>>6608779
I'd include 4 Main CPUs just for the hell of it. Also one or two Fujitsu TGP or an Analog Devices SHARC to push the math along. Not one but two primary display processors; one for sprites, the other for polygons. One VDPs do the Backgrounds, another one to do complex frame buffer operations on top of everything to relieve the main DPs. A custom MPEG-1 decoder chip for at least full VCD quality video. Two custom sound processors; one for FM/AS/SM, one for wavetable. Each one with a dedicated DSP for effects. Oh... and every sub system gets its own dedicated RAM. Lots of it. It also gets one one of them new fast Quad speed drives. It has three extension bays for later upgrades. The system launches early 1995, for a suggested retail price of $2000. Only 1 in 1000 programmers is talented enough to really push the hardware.

games are held on magnetic strips like a credit card, and can be in multiple discs

A large number of peripherals that only work with a few games and connect to the console via IR.

>>6608628
Having to connect your console to an acoustic coupler and dial up to an unreliable, slow and unsafe online service before you can play your full price titles. If you say mean words on the BBS then they lock away your games.
Oh, wait....

The console comes with a laser head display like the R Zone (pic related). However, it will only display the game's UI. Consoles only support one headset, so only player 1 can see the HUD. Also give it scannable cards instead of cartridges like the Hyperscan (>>6609272)

>>6609929
HACK THE PLANET

>>6609505
What kind of inbred psychopath is getting their games library revoked over steam forum posts. It's like a cesspool for retardation. How about stop screaming about killing Jews you fucking crybaby

>>6608628
I see your atari 5200 controller and raise you this abomination I spent 9001 hours in MS Paint making

>>6610108
How about stop sucking multiculti cock you fucking gaywad

>>6610136
this but the numpad doesn't have real buttons, instead using a shitty indented piece of touchpad plastic like the dpad on this

>>6609505
Fortunately, being a triggered cuck wasn't so much of a thing back when we used acoustically coupled modems. There was often what /v/abies would call "console wars" but I never saw anyone say mean words, like "nigger" for example. Niggers just weren't into it back then. But I did work with a few very skilled people who happened to be black.

>>6609269
Why were 90s consoles such a bunch of clusterfucks?

Intellivision controllers, specifically the intellivision ii's were incredibly uncomfortable to use. There is just no way to hold the controller in a way that makes it stable and allows access to all buttons. The side buttons were an abomination and always felt like they were stuck. Just abysmal.

No dedicated video/sound chips, everything is done on a (single threaded) CPU

>>6609269
and all of it gimped by a 8-bit bus

>>6608628
Holy dilate I want that in my totally not fake pussy with szechuan sauce in my totally not fake pussy am i a meme yet im totally a meme amirite im not trying to hard im perfectly normal but omg being normal is a bad thing i need my mommy

>>6608656
This and the P2 controller must be daisychained to P1.

>>6608632
>spring-loaded garbage that will obviously break
>Nintendo made a revised top-loading model at the end of the console's life-cycle
>only has RF output
What a piece of shit

>>6611642
Yea, WTF was with that. The Japanese Model 2 had A/V.

>>6610108
>we can't just block your account from playing online or communicating with other users
>sometimes what they say is SO RACIST we need to completely lock them out of their account including software they purchased
They need to get sued over this. It's like how console digital stores make people chat in to manually cancel a pre-order, except in countries where they're forced by law to have a cancel order button.

>>6610136
>Back
>START
fucking lol

>>6611715
>we can't just block your account from playing online or communicating with other users
Except that's literally what they did. Don't just believe everything you read here or on OAG, try to look into things a little.

>>6609929
>The console comes with a laser head display
Sized for an 11 year old.