/vr/ - Retro Games

The Sega Shiturn.

NGage comes to mind.

>>5511192
that shitty red vr thing by nintendo back in the day.
the CD-I

Ouya

>>5511208
Gonna double this. I heard stories of the Saturn. I recall exactly one (1) instance in my entire life where anyone ever referred to actually using the NGage, saw some kid from my school buying games for it.

Once. Ever. And I never saw the system, nor did I see him play it.

>>5511206
Atleast it was somewhat succesful

>>5511217
CD-i wasn't intended to be a game console in first instance, Virtual Boy was just rushed

>>5511208
>>5511235
NGage was okay but could have been handled better

But really, it is the Jag
>screwed up managment (fucking over their own devs, dumb "do the math" campaign)
>screwed up hardware that bottlenecks itself
>very shitty library
>when they could at the very least have something decent like the 7800 or Lynx

>>5511192
PlayStation Classic

>>5511192
The Casio Loopy, a crappy Japan-only attempt to enter into the 32 bit console market.

>>5511192
Maybe, but here's a few more contenders
>Virtual Boy
>NGage
>PC-FX
>Tiger R-Zone
My personal vote goes for the R-Zone, simply the worst system I've ever laid eyes on.

>>5511206
It was a hit in Japan, being a hit in at least one major region disqualifies it from being a contender to biggest flop of all time. Not to mention there are simply bigger flops.

>>5511232
If we were to include non-retro consoles this would certainly be it.

>>5511295
>Targeted only to female gamers
>It only had 11 games made for it
>It was introduced on 1995, only got a year of support and was retired from the market on 1998

>>5511192

>>5511192
-Apple pipin
-That one handheld that was funded by the Swedish mafia
-Phillips CDi
-Amiga CD 32
-Ouya

>>5511426
>PowerPC
A death sentence to everything it touches. There has never been a successful product with those evil chips inside.

>>5511295
God damn, I’ve never even heard of this thing or seen it until just now! That’s a pretty big failure.

>>5511428
There certainly have been
Wii, Xbox 360, Mars Rover, macs before the switch to intel just to name a few

>>5511465
No, these products were all failures

>>5511427
>That one handheld that was funded by the Swedish mafia
Please elaborate.

>all these wrong retards

>>5511490
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gizmondo

>>5511494
It only sold 25,000 units and only had 14 games.

>>5511490
Small electronics company brings on Swedish guy, who happened to be Swedish mob boss, who was basically Tony Montana - down to even making one of his cars have a license plate that basically reads "cocaine" in Swedish.

Company decides to make its own handheld. Spends hilarious, exorbitant sums on it - bought a store just to sell it, hosted insane launch parties with Sting, Pharrell Williams, and the like showing up. Paid thirteen and a half million dollars to devs to make games, some of which didn't even make sense (a typing game with no keyboard? On a handheld?) They made 1.4 million in sales in the first year, and in the same period, directors for the company were paid 6.6 million. The entire thing was some sort of fucking front.

As for the Gizmondo itself? It wasn't the worst thing ever. But pretty unremarkable compared to all that prior shit. All the gaming magazines at the time didn't talk about the Gizmondo, they talked about that Swedish fuck crashing his Ferrari.

>>5511472
ok retard

>>5511232
The Immortal John Hancock likes it and that's good enough for me.

This. Its not as hilarious as the jaguar but was a huge failure.

>>5511232
this

>>5511685
Watching the Halcyon guy get utterly demolished by Gary Kildall (OS inventor Microsoft ripped off for DOS) when he claims that thing had real AI was classic:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeI5zKeGELA

>>5511192
Probably yes, but Jaguar takes the cake for being obnoxiously phony in their marketing campaign and yet being the biggest loser of the first half of the 90s. Jaguar virtually has no good games, I can find more playable shit on these obscure Japan-only consoles for hentai games
>>5511206
I can list out dozens of games on Saturn that were decent any time of the day, but 20 years later I still can't find a good Jaguar one

>>5511465
>macs before the switch to intel
Except it was the switch to x86 and away from powerpc that actually allowed mac to compete in the desktop and laptop markets in the mid 2000s. Macbooks were so much better than ibooks. Maybe powerpc wasn't a death sentence but it held them back, and were only really preferred because of their graphical workstation capabilities for specialized use cases until then.

You're right about the rest of the list, it did have usefulness.

Well...

>>5511775
THE GRAPHICS ON THE BOX LOOK REALLY GOOD HOW WAS THE BOWLINg game?

>>5511302
I still have my R-Zone somewhere.

What I remember being a spectacular failure was Tiger's Game.com

>>5511802
I remember seeing this at ebgames and thinking it looked awesome.

>>5511802
The Game.com at least looks like a functional, sane handheld. The R-Zone made the Virtual Boy look like a masterpiece.

>>5511791
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZoK6NacVq4

>>5511761
The Jaguar had one good game.

>>5511208
>>5511235

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNQYVZGYnSg

>>5511192
What's hilarious about it?

>>5511295
It was just a console marketed to girls, it's gimmick was printing out stickers related to what yu did in the games. It did that pretty well.

>>5511802
Damn, that's ugly

>>5511428
>>5511773
The original iMac was a huge success and was the singular device that allowed Apple to compete in the desktop market again after years of garbage. All of that garbage also ran on PPC, sure, but the iMac was definitely a successful PPC machine. The G3 and G4 towers were excellent as well, with the G5 being kind of a sad stop-gap before the Intel switch blew it out of the water at a lower price point. The Intel switch was definitely the right thing to do and made the Mac better, though it is decidedly not retro

>>5511802
The problem this thing really had was it tried to do things that weren't ironed out yet.
Internet connectivity in a handheld, touch screen. If Tiger had focused more on the practical useful parts, like screen, sound, and CPU(and the d-pad of course), and gotten some third-party backing, it could have given Nintendo a small run for the money, like the PSP did some time later.

>>5511773
>Except it was the switch to x86 and away from powerpc that actually allowed mac to compete in the desktop and laptop markets in the mid 2000s.
That doesn't mean PowerMacs were not a very successful product for a long time. Motorola and IBM had simply sandbagged Apple for the last time, with Motorola preparing to pull out of chipmaking and IBM unreliable as the sole source of mass market chips for a customer whose demand they just couldn't fill. Good thing Apple had kept the Yellow Box/Cocoa branch for X86 current since day 1 of the NeXT acquisition. Their transition to X86 was so trivial and smooth to implement because they had maintained that code in parallel to the PPC code and used it as a trump card in their back pocket should Motorola or IBM ever fail them.

>Macbooks were so much better than ibooks.
MacBooks were the successor to PowerBooks, not iBooks. iBooks were the laptop equivalent of the iMac line, entry-level systems with limited upgrade options.

>Maybe powerpc wasn't a death sentence but it held them back, and were only really preferred because of their graphical workstation capabilities for specialized use cases until then.
PPC had real performance advantages over X86 at varying points in time. Implementations of both traded the performance lead until IBM alone just couldn't keep up with the products of Intel's and AMD's competition with each other in the P4 vs. Athlon XP/64 wars.

One of the PPC's killer apps was its native compatibility with 680x0 code, since 680x0 chips had been used in pre-PPC Macs. Along with Apple's dynamic recompiler, it meant generations of software could keep running on their modern architecture at the time of the switch. Since people used old Macs for longer than PC users tended to, it also meant dual ("fat") binaries could be created to run on both architectures.

tl;dr - PPC made sense for Apple and was good for a long time.

>>5511880
pretty good soundtrack at least

>>5511208
>>5511235
>>5511921
Who /sidetalking/ here?

Retailed for $300, had five games, each sold for $100 a piece. Could play PCE games, and was compatible with the PCE-CD. Which cost $400.

I honestly cannot think of a worse console, or even add-on. The SuperGrafx came out in 1989, a year after the Mega Drive made its debut, and had nothing to offer but four times the RAM and an extra video chip.

>>5511685
The thing never even came out. If we're counting unreleased shit, I'd say the SNES-CD was pretty abysmal.

>>5512393
No way, if anything it's just an overpriced, gorgeous PCE that can do something pretty irrelevant. Like a Panasonic Q.

>>5512410
Not even sure that should count.

>>5512393
What about the satellaview?

>>5511428
Good goim, (((Intel))) is just as powerful as the state of Israel and don't you forget it.

>>5512423
Not bad - was supported for five years, offered a good breadth of content, wasn't prohibitively expensive.

It was worse than Sega Channel, but still decent.

>>5512421
I only draw the comparison because the SG was at least a perfectly usable and beautiful PCE. So many other nominees ITT were total orphans.

>>5511302
>PC-FX
There's your answer. Atari has had the writing on the wall for awhile, but NEC was on Nintendo's ass in Japan during the 4th gen. The PC-FX was such an absolutely monumental failure compared to the fire they had prior, it can't really be compared to other literal whos attempts at getting into the market.

>>5512537
Can you imagine trying to make waves in 5th gen with a non-3D system that specialized in FMV? What a dumb gamble, not even the most extreme luddite anime otaku would buy into that.

>>5511208
I still have my ngage

>>5512561
PC-Engine had always been the otaku console but the PC-FX ended up losing that spot to the Saturn. Nevertheless the PC-FX seems to have still had some support in the hardcore otaku circles, for istance I don't think I've seen a single PC-FX game that did not have surprisingly well animated anime scenes in it.

>>5512537
This was like the last home console with porn games officially released. It's a big shame it flopped.

>>5511192
Yes. Any DMG rival not made by Sega, NEC, or Atari. If we're being honest, all of the better known rivals were also massive failures by comparison. The original Game Boy was a fucking juggernaut.

The Atari Jaguar lives on, by the way. I believe its tech is still used in vending machines, hospital equipment, or some other crap. I think I read something about sewing machines, though, that might actually be the 3DO.

>>5513126
I thought the CD-i and the 3DO were the last consoles that had porn games but forgot that when the PC-FX was discontinued, the two were already extinct.

read thread no mention of Sega 32X
the jaguar was shit, but Atari were shit, no-one expected anything better.
but the 32X came out when Sega were the #1 / #2 game company in the world, and fucked them back into the bush league.
it was an abortion that destroyed confidence in their abilities, cost them a bomb and sucked hype out of the Saturn.
so I'm going with 32X

>>5514792
>destroyed confidence in their abilities, cost them a bomb ad sucked hype out of the Saturn
Only outside Japan. It was a shit decision to release it prior to the Saturn abroad, but it was the Saturn's abysmal launch outside Japan that fucked them back to the bush league

>>5511192
CD-i
Sega CD
Atari Lynx
>>5511295
What a terrible name for a console.
>>5511428
>>5511773
>>5512117
>>5512370

>>>/g/ with your iFaggotry.

>>5511428
Ps3
>>5511880
>The Jaguar had one good game.
AvP was great for the time

Switch

>>5513131
The case design for the Jaguar was re-purposed for dental equipment.

>>5515851
Yeah, I know about that. I was actually referring to what is under the hood.

>>5511235
The ngage had the best marketing campaign ever.
Insult your core audience calling them manchildren for playing games on handhelds when they could be playing on adult devices like phones instead.

>>5514808
Imagine how much better the saturn launch could've been if sega hadn't wasted time and money launching / promoting 32X and if both retailer and consumer confidence in the sega brand hadn't been undermined by a failed and utterly ill-conceived product.
Tbf Sony would still have anally raped sega because PS1 had everything - EVERYTHING - going for it, but still...

>>5514792
The 32X itself was at least a piece of decent hardware.

>>5516239
>In order to convince the press that the 32X was a worthwhile console, Sega flew in journalists from all around the country to San Francisco for a party at a local nightclub. The event featured a speech from Tom Kalinske, live music with a local rapper praising the 32X, and 32X games on exhibition. However, the event turned out to be a bust, as journalists attempted to leave the party due to its loud music and unimpressive games on display, only to find that the buses that brought them to the nightclub had just left and would not return until the scheduled end of the party.[7][17]
hahahahahahha

I'll ask here: Is Defender 2000 worth getting?

>>5511192
The Jaguar is such a sad story/console. It's A E S T H E T I C as hell and I know as a kid growing up on 2600, I wanted to see it succeed and Atari make a huge comeback. This would be the modern equivalent of Sega getting back in the console business and releasing "Dreamcast 2" and it totally fucking flopping.

The trouble was, as a teenager back then, there was no fucking way I could afford it, I forget the MSRP but it was ridiculous at the time.

We did get a few fun games with it though. Most were absolute dogshit, but a few were fun, and several more were neat from a "tech demo" type perspective.

Tempest 2000 is the killer game for it, which is sad, but it is a really good game. I'm going to get or make a spinner for it soon.

anyone remember this?

>>5511257
Agree with you on the case of the CD-i. People for some reason think this is a pure ass game console but it isn't. It's not like the 3DO, which can do the same things but it's more tailored as a game console.

>>5511192
The problem w Atari was that it was mismanaged from the time Nolan Bushnell walked out the door. Tramiel was no genius but even he could see the writing on the wall in certain respects. Personally, I would've gone with the Panther but I understand the motivation for wanting to make a splash as a 64-bit system. However, Atari just didn't have the content pipeline as other systems had. They also made some mistakes (such as going for expensive cartridges as opposed to cheap CDs).

In the end, though, this wasn't so much a failure hardware-wise as it was just way too little and way too late.

>>5517847
>However, Atari just didn't have the content pipeline as other systems had.
Very much this. And linked directly to that is the fact that their brand equity had completely dried up. The public was even less receptive to the Jaguar entering a crowded market than they ever were to the Lynx as a GameBoy competitor, and publishers knew it. Atari just never saw the writing on the wall telling them to quit the hardware business.

>>5511192
I remember kids and adults alike mocking Atari for "lying about being 64-bit". Yes, it turns out that it technically was, but in practice it really delivered 16-bit graphics.

>>5517524
I think it was $250 or so at launch, significantly more than the SNES or Genesis but way cheaper than the 3DO (which marketing constantly compared it to.)

>>5512378
I had an N-Gage QD back then and got another working one now to replay Tomb Raider, Pandemonium and got other games like The Sims Bustin'Out.
It was a great phone for its time, loved it.

But it's not a retro failure, so off-topic.

I remember a friend hyping the fucking out of his new Zodiac, calling it "the gamers' PDA".

Super Lady Cassette Vision, made by Epoch. Ony 30 games were made for it.

The Action Max, a VHS-based gaming console where you use a light gun to shoot at some precorded movies to score points.

>>5511426
The fuck where they thinking with that face button arrangement...? How do you screw it up like that? Almost as if they looked at the SNES and PS1 pads and decided they wanted to do something similar, but only not as good.

>>5518235
Isn't that just another edition of the standard Super Cassette Vision?

>>5518253
I remember this, along with the unrelated Photon live action TV show that you could watch while wearing a Photon sensor and gun and do the same thing, but IIRC you could also get shot. I think the Lazer Tag cartoon (?) worked the same way with Lazer Tag equipment.

>>5511295
The Loopy wasn't really a video game console either, it was a sticker printer, and most of its software was sticker workshop programs. It had like two games, and one of them was more of a sticker workshop with some gameplay worked in that a game anyway.

>>5511192
Your life

>>5511208
NGage predicted the future, if anything.

>>5511208
Came here to say this, the N-Gage was pretty hilarious in its failure.

>>5511232

>>5511494
came here to post this
>>5511539
and had the Swedish mafia involved in it's distribution I think.

>>5511802
This was like the fetal alcohol syndrome version of the Nintendo DS, years earlier.

>>5511192
That's easy
>release an 8-bit cartridge console that played the exact same games as their tape counterparts only 2-3 times the price
>release an 8-bit cartridge console the same month the 16-bit Megadrive/Genesis launched

Production lasted less than a year

>>5519920
I forget to mention I literally played one of these back when they originally released, Pang was just about the only worthwhile game on it. there was almost no difference between the cassette version and cartridge, except cartridge cost 3 times as much

>>5511880
There were one or two other ones.
Doom was a decent enough port, though it lacked the music and had fewer levels.

>>5519920
Yes, a lot of bad ideas in the late 80s, early 90s from a lot of companies. Sadly paved the road for the demise of quite a few of them.

>>5520489
Those bad ideas were often a desperate last attempt to stay relevant, or at least grab a piece of such a lucrative and growing market on their way down before cashing out.

>>5519936
I have no idea how good it actually is on the platform, but I'm told Rayman was originally a Jaguar game that got ported to everything under the sun.

>>5511472
You got moxie, kid. I'll give you that.

>>5520845
Not quite:
>The team felt that the Atari Jaguar was the first system that could handle the graphics they wanted and moved development to a Jaguar version, and advertisements in late 1994 announced the game as a Jaguar exclusive. Focus was later shifted to the PlayStation version due to the system's greater power, ease to program for, and CD technology.
So it was announced as a Jaguar exclusive for a while, but during production they switched to having the PSX version be the "main" version, and the Jaguar ended up with a somewhat downgraded version.

>>5520845
Rayman had a messy development cycle that kept switching which system the game was primarily being developed for. It started as an Atari ST game and ultimately became a PS1 game that got ported to other systems.

>>5511192
Did Atari seriously think people wouldn't figure out they stuck double 32-bit processors inside it and tried to pass it off as 64-bit?

>>5521009
I think they figured people would think that would still be really powerful.
And it was powerful, in a way, but good luck figuring out how to put that to use.

>>5511192
The Gizmondo and the Ouya come to mind.

>>5514792
The 32X was definitely one of the absolute worst, yeah.

>>5517074
I mean, the things work, but the library is meager, and by GOD what a terrible concept.
Like, I'll defend the Sega CD, because in spite of all the FMV garbage, there was also some genuinely cool stuff on the thing, and it playing music CDs was an alright bonus for the time, but the 32X was so horribly ill conceived as an idea it's unbelievable.

The Saturn was already in the works, why was even the idea of the 32X entertained at all?

>>5511192
>Is there a more hilarious and bigger failure in game history than the Atari Jaguar?

your face

>>5521125
Is that you, Tramiel?

>>5521125
ganon pls go

>>5520882
>>5520887
Oh, I got it wrong then. My bad, thanks for the correction.

>>5521114
>The Saturn was already in the works, why was even the idea of the 32X entertained at all?

because of the jaguar, which i guess ironically makes the jag somewhat successful

>>5517828
No but I read about it. Virtually Impossible to Sell. Everything in it's library except for one golf game was edutainment. Notable for running a version of Windows that hasn't been dumped.

The Nintendo e-reader if it was released as a console.

>>5511192
The Gakken Compact Vision TV Boy.
This Japan-only console was basically an Atari 2600 pretending to compete with the just released Famicom, which basically assraped it from the beginning.

>>5511192
Nuon. The retard child of CD-I and 3DO.

>>5511880
But it's not exclusive to the Jaguar...

>>5523997
>t. poorfag

>>5511192
There was an unhilarious yuge failure of a shitpost on 4chan in 2019 but the shitposter wasn't launched in 1999 or earlier so we're not allowed to discuss it here.