/vr/ - Retro Games

What a handsome lad he grows up to be.

>>5301026
How was he so familiar with Hyrulean history right after he sprouted?

>>5301035
probably got all of his daddy's memories

When you think about it, as he grows he's simultaneously consuming and crushing the rotting corpse of his father. That's kinda fucked up.

>>5301058
it's kinda freudian

>>5301020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJ-5sJcxvwQ
I BREATH YOUR OUTBREATH

>>5301058
based

>>5301058
Do you know how all of us got here?

>>5301020
'HUUUUUAAAAAAAGGHH!', I shouted in disgust after suffering through one of the dullest video games of all time. Seriously, each episode following the boy "adventurer" and his pals from Hyrule as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the cartoonish imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of repetitive puzzles, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Nintendo vetoed the idea of a third party producing the games; Miyanoto made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody- just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for their annual "party games" and childish fighting franchise. The Zelda series might be anti-Sony (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-Spyro series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement.

>a-at least the platforming elements were good though

"No!"

The writing is dreadful; the exploration was nonexistent. As I played, I noticed that every time Link went to "explore" a largely empty world, Nintendo shoehorned in some repetitive puzzles to pad out the game. I began marking on the back of a Nintendo Power magazine every time I came to the same rehashed box pushing/lever pulling puzzles. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Nintendo's team is so governed by cliches and milking tired franchises ad nauseum that they have no other style of development. Later I watched a lavish, loving Let's Play of The Ocarina of Time by some YouTube manchild. He said something to the effect of, "If these kids are playing Ocarina of Time at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to owning a Nintendo Switch." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you play The Ocarina of Time you are, in fact, trained to play the same dull Nintendo rehashes decade after decade.

>>5302774
I took the bus. What about yourself?

>>5302774
Literally sucking the life force out of our mom?

>>5302782
get the fuck out with that garbage pasta.

>>5302810
Nah.