/vr/ - Retro Games

>>1754490

>>1754495

>>1754498

>>1754505

>>1754510

>>1754520

>>1754523
Does anyone have the GameShark advertisement of the kid smiling with shark teeth?

>>1754528

>>1754535

>>1754543

>>1754550

>>1754554

>>1754562

>>1754569

>>1754572

>>1754575

>>1754580

>>1754583

>>1754589

>>1754595

>>1754598

>>1754606

>>1754614
I think thats the bottom of my folder

>>1754617

>>1754617
>2010 price adjusted for inflation

What's going on in this ad?

>>1754670
Not sure, but I believe those carts are the same price now as they were 20 years ago.

>>1754490
I remember this Nanotek one because it got a "Grossest Ad Award" in one of those year-end GamePros or whatever.

Pic related is one of my favorites. Really wish I had it in higher res.

>>1754490
Wow, that's really graphic.
I'm 23 and that makes me cringe. Just look at that detail.

>>1754689
The idea is that if you were to buy something that cost that much then in today's money that's how much it would cost, roughly.

>>1754779
love that twisted mix of latin and cyrillic

>crazy ivan
>kgazch ivai

Another weird one.

>>1754779
OP here. Yeah I really dug this add though, even as a kid I thought it so sweet thinking my eyes could bleed from marathon gaming. Never happened though. I found a few more in my downloads folder including the gameshark ad I was talking about. Anyone ever use it? Game Genie? Did the actually work?

>>1755517

>>1755519

>>1755521

>>1754498

##SHOTSFIRED

>>1755525
so swag

>>1755527

>>1755528

>>1754543
Anyone know what fonts they used in these 90's Nintendo ads? Especially the font on the left half of this ad. Been looking everywhere for a name a while ago, couldn't find anything.

>>1755529

>>1755531
No clue but here is a joke ad someone made a while back. I was debating on uploading it since it was doctored. Seriously split my sides.

>>1755534

>>1755534
>tali bands
Subtle

>>1755536
I need an expansion pak for my brain
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BtUt7-MyelY

>>1755541

>>1755545

>>1755546

>Yoshi's Island 64

Wait is that a thing?

>>1755546

>>1755550
If you look at the other games there like Zelda screen you'll see that those are some either deprecated shots or bull shots. I don't know about that Yoshi one... atleast US wise.

>>1755557

>>1755558

>>1754535
Did Sega never realize that with all of their Nintendo "bashing" in their ads that they were inadvertently advertising Nintendo Products?

>>1755551
Sometimes life can be complicated...

So why not simplify it by grafting a billion pointless addons to your Gameboy?

>>1755578
It worked though. Sega outsold the SNES 4 years in a row and the general consensus was that the SNES was for mere children. It took DKC to eventually pry them away from all that blast processing.

>>1755589
Pretty much. Newfags on this forum like to bash DKC, but those graphics really were something the Genesis can't do (not enough colors to make digitized sprites not look like ass), and (2 at least) was a really great game.

>>1755592
Donkey Kong Country was the reason why Nintendo and thumbs were made.

>>1755612
That throne

>>1755517
>thinking my eyes could bleed from marathon gaming
Actually the joke of the ad is that the game is so fast-paced, the guy ripped off his own eyelid to keep himself from blinking and missing anything.

>>1755612
>John Romero's about to make you his toilet

>>1754510
>Don't you already have this game?
>No mom, you idiot! I have Bloodstorm and Bonesquad and Bloodstorm II, stupid

>>1755626
>Warning: Dont Buy This.
okay

>>1755619
>That foot

What the fuck man

>>1755627

>>1755592
What about Mortal Kombat and Rise of the Robots?

>>1755617
I was too stupid to read as a kid. I just liked the graphic

>>1754554
Why is he fighting a raspberry man with chainsaw hands?

>>1755626
>Built-In Sequel
The hell does that mean? Like a second quest kind of thing?

>>1755619
>>1755630
Dying of laughter.

>>1755683
It's a completely different game.
You can even play the second one online:

http://www.cauldron-2.com/game/default.htm

"enjoy"

>>1755550
Likely that was just what they called Yoshi's Story before the official name was announced. Same with Zelda 64 and OoT.

>>1754575
Love that one. Anyone got this one ad I vaguely remember? It was just a picture of a hand with cuts, calluses, and scabs on it along with stuff like pizza sauce and text with arrows all around it explaining what is on the hand and how it got on it. I think it was for some mech game but I can never find any info on it when I look.

>>1754523
i used to masturbate to this

>>1754510
Now I can see why Johnny Cage was killed off in Mortal Kombat 2.

>>1755541
Oh god, that was so 90's, I... I don't even know anymore. It was gloriously cheezy.

>>1756914
and I THIS.

>>1756903
Dat ass. Also if this is it I cant find a decent scan of it anywhere. Its for Gundam Battle Assault

>>1757202
That is it! I even searched Gundam Battle Assault ads on google and never found it for some reason. Thanks anon.

>>1757220
Also I just found a larger scan by reverse image searching yours. But seriously thanks for finding that anon, I've been trying to find it for years.

>>1757230
I recalled this one and read your post and it suddenly came back to me. I searched like 15 minutes to pull up that silly little thumb nail. Good scan you got there though.

>>1757230
Was the game really that...in tents though?

>>1757309
My brother died playing that game dude...

>>1757230
Gundam Battle Assault use to do that to my hand until I unlocked the Epyon then I just spammed dragon punch to win.

>>1757051
Oh shit, do you have page 2 in the same high resolution? Pic related is the only one I have, should have scanned it myself before I threw out all my old mags.

>>1754498
"If it were available on cartridge, it'd retail for around $1,200."

Holy fucking shit that made me bust a nut in laughter.

>>1757464
Yeah, just pulled an issue of Gamepro (March 1998). Sit tight.

>>1756903
How can a image that reeks so hard of '80s contain a URL? This ad has to be a joke!

Japs don't fuck around with your fun time.

>>1757645
Its got like Laura Crofts likeness so hard in it I dont think its 80s mah man

>>1757464
>>1757602
Here you go. Not the best scan, but it should suffice.

I won't lie to you guys; I've spanked it more than a few times to this ad back in the day.

>>1754572

W-what do they want me to do in my underwear?

>>1754569

I love how random and RAD those ads were

>>1757672
Awesome, thanks.

>>1757659
Hah you got me

>>1754523
Is that Pat Bateman?
She better get the fuck outta there lol

Top notch hype that was matched with a quality game not to mention the art direction Midway/ The MK Team went with that was fucking great at the time and to this day in my opinion.

>>1756903
>>1757660
they drew lara in heels, those bastards

You need a new brain if you think the game is worth playing. I think that's what they're saying.

God damn. Vidya ads back then had too many words full of nothing but snark bordering on making fun of the target audience. Has it changed much? The last time I looked at a magazine was in 2001-ish.

>>1757925
Yeah, they're a lot more boring now. It's pretty much, hey look at this game, this is this game, you're probably gonna fuckin' buy this game. It only recently changed too, honestly. I remember Nintendo Power ads being pretty zany like those ITT at least into like 2005-2006

>>1755592
>but those graphics really were something the Genesis can't do
Except yes it could. Donkey Kong Country has a very limited palleted per stage. Just look at Toy Story on Genesis

>>1755578
Duh. They were advertising Nintendo products as inferior. Sort of like those Mac vs. PC ads a few years back.

>>1755592
I don't bash on DKC it's a great game regardless of what platform it's on.

>>1757230
I REMEMBER THIS AD

>>1755550
It was originally Yoshi's Island 64. I even remember screenshots that had baby mario.

my favorite. Actually bought an old magazine just to take out the page and have if framed

>>1757659
Apparently the guy in this ad is dead now, though he didn't take his life with a sword. He died in a car accident IIRC.

>>1757848
>mortal kombat
>quality game

>>1754490
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjMGMdNcAKY

This was my first game magazine that I had when I was about 6 years old and it was in anticipation of getting an N64 for christmas. I read it so much that it ended up becoming tattered and torn. Much nostalgia.

>>1758021
What magazine was that? If the magazine are fairly common I may do this myself.

>>1755623
Is that Bryan Cranston?

>>1754505
Dat OST

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJwh3erQlyE

>>1754490
Hardcore

>>1758304
>What magazine was that?

Gamefan I believe, Id have to take it down to look and eh, I forget the issue

you can often actually find the pages and spreads on ebay

>>1758072
MKII was definitely a quality game.

Does anybody have the ad for the Immortal with all the skulls representing the various horrible deaths the player can experience?

>>1759751
Thanks man. I'll have a scourer on ebay then!

>>1755587
Man I really got into all those gameboy addons.
I had a screen magnifier, light, and rechargeable battery pack. It was awesome.

>>1754626
>doesn't have the game's title on it

Worst advert ever

>>1757907
You know, the music alone makes it worth 40 bucks.

>>1762043
Sometimes, I pull it so hard, I rip the skin.

>>1758304
EGM #71 has it.. try retromags you can download a huge version and print it out or something..

>>1762070
those poor cushions..

>>1762074

this was so much more funny after reading this one

>>1762065

>>1762082

why was the GB that color anyways?

There's a Resident Evil ad I saw once in a UK Playstation mag years ago, but I have never been able to find it online.

It's an overhead shot of a bathtub full of blood on a checkered floor with bloody footprints leading away from the tub.

Anyone know what I'm talking about?

>>1754498
Square was really that pissed about the N64? wow
Never saw this advert back then

>>1762070
This reminds me of another one, perhaps in the same sports game series, that was a photograph from behind of two dudes sitting on the bleachers, with their pants sagging down to show their butt cracks. And the caption said, "Finally, baseball without all the chili dog farts" or something like that.

>>1764332
The campground my family used to frequent had one of these in their arcade. Completely forgot about this thing!

I can't remember playing it more than once or twice though, since that was around 1992-1993, and everyone was all over the SF2's and MK's.

>>1755578
Sega's bashing ads were all pants-on-head retarded, or just disingenuous at best.

First came the "Nintendon't" ads. Well, of course your 16-bit system with a modern processor is more impressive than a previous-generation system. Never mind the fact that your own 8-bit system was crushed by the NES.

Then they say the Genesis, a system that been out for a full year before the SNES, has a bigger library. Duh. Your launch library wasn't spectacular, either. Can't wait to play some Altered Beast and Tommy Lasorda Baseball! Never mind the fact that Nintendo has always had you beaten out for library size and third-party support.

"Blast processing." Yeah, the Genesis had a faster processor, but that's not some kind of technical wizardry. But sure, make your commercial saying that Super Mario Kart, a fast game with impressive scaling effects is somehow slow and boring. Never mind that Nintendo's withered technology strategy has been beating you out in the console and handheld markets.

Oh, you've got a Sega CD? Well, of course Nintendo isn't going to make one. Nintendo doesn't need to start producing a parade of bad, expensive peripherals to maintain market presence. You might as well advertise the Sega CD by saying "We don't know how else to get people to make games for us."

And all of this is a shame. The SNES and Genesis were both excellent game systems with individual strengths and many fun games. In fact, especially as I grow older, I find myself appreciating many Genesis games. Lies and gimmicks do not make a good business strategy, however.

>>1765586
Then Nintendo got back at them with their Donkey Kong Conuntry ads.
"Not Cd-Rom, not 32 bits or an overpriced addon. Just your Snes."

>>1765586
Master System crushed the NES in some countries, mostly in Europe, Brazil and Australia

Altered Beast was only chosen as a bundled title because it was like a tech demo for the system; big sprites and speech. Revenge of the Shinobi for example is an awesome early Genesis game so stop cherry picking shit.

Super Mario Kart had a co-processor on the cartridge because the SNES couldn't handle the game alone. Meanwhile Road Rash ran on vanilla Genesis hardware.

The withered technology strategy was only applied to the Game Boy, not the SNES. Genesis beat the SNES in the western markets for that matter.

The Sega CD was hardly a bad accessory, it was powerful and capable, just not particularly suited to FMV games. Only 20% of the CD library is FMV games, but people pretend it is 90%.

Sega had no problem getting Western developers making games for their console. The SNES did have a problem getting Western developers making games for it.

The SNES had a very slow start in the West, mostly because its early games looked slow and gimmicky compared to the likes of Sonic, Thunder Force, Strider and so on.

>>1755615

>$3398
>For 10 MB

Thank god the prices have dropped on hard drives now a days.

>>1757202
Oh, you like Dat Ass ads?

Scanned from Tips & Tricks, November '97.

Cover not ad.

>>1766513
>dat Batou
"Tonight. You."

>>1766447
>Super Mario Kart had a co-processor on the cartridge because the SNES couldn't handle the game alone

The DSP used by SMK was originally an onboard chip of the SNES until it was removed midway though the motherboard's development to save on the cost of the system alone, and even then there's plenty of games that did impressive things off of the stock SNES alone, such as Wolfenstein 3D which is rendered in software.

>>1766593

Don't feed the consolewar shitposters.

>>1766593
>such as Wolfenstein 3D which is rendered in software.
Yes that was pretty good, though low resolution. Toy Story also had an FPS level, though the Genesis version of the level was considerably more advanced.

>>1766643
The Genesis version of Toy Story had its own goddamn MOD player through some technical absurdity. It's a shame that only two songs in the game use it, though, for some odd reason:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPr4V1c2VqA

>>1766646
Whoah, shit, really? Source on that?

>>1766649
http://segaretro.org/Toy_Story

People have also tested the game with other MODs and it does indeed work.

>>1766447
I think Sega felt very inadequate compared to Nintendo, seeing as their first home console (the SG-1000) was launched on the same exact date as the Famicom, yet it had tech comparable to the Colecovision. And then Sega's next 8-bit console, the Sega Master System, had exactly one advantage over the NES; less limited colors, while other aspects were either equal (4 MHz Z80 is about the same as a 2MHz 6502) or worse (no DPCM support, no triangle wave). And the console was three years newer. THREE. YEARS.

Hell, even comparing multiplatform games, I seem to find SMS games worse in some way or another. I think the SMS version of Shinobi is about the same as the NES version. As much as I love Sega's other consoles, I can't think of anything positive to say about the Master System. Nothing on the console was really any good, maybe except Wonder Boy.

>>1766663
I'm not a big fan of the Master System either, I think Sega made some poor choices on that console. But on the other hand the Genesis was a very well designed system. It's two years older than the SNES and beats it in many ways. Its only real weakness was the low color count inherited from Master System.

>>1766672
Not to bash the console, but I think many developers ignored the console for reasons other than Nintendo's monopoly. The NES, compared to the SMS and 7800, has much better designed hardware, and I believe that Nintendo would've rounded third party support even without their monopoly. The NES would've been the PS1 of it's time, the right machine at the right time. That said, many NES games feel horribly dated, especially since most NES developers were arcade developers, and this problem then migrated to the Genesis. Many Genesis games feel like enhanced NES games.

>>1766679
>Many Genesis games feel like enhanced NES games.
Which ones in particular? Some literally were, like Battletoads and Snake Rattle N Roll.

>>1766683
Name it, and it pretty much feels like one. It'd be easier to name games that actually feel new.

>Taz-Mania
>MUSHA
>Bob
>Sunsoft Batman
>Captain America
>Castlevania
>Contra (even if it's a technical masterpiece, it still feels like an NES game)
>most of Sega's pre-Sonic games

>>1766691
I take a lot of issue with you saying MUSHA, Castlevania Bloodlines and Contra Hard Corps feel like NES games. How exactly does Hard Corps feel like a NES game and Alien Wars doesn't?

>>1766705
>MUSHA

It's like Compiles other shooters, except you can shot giant laserbeams.

>Bloodlines

It's actually closer to a modern game, but it still looks and feels like an enhanced NES game.

>Hard Corps

I never said Alien Wars was any better, nor did it feel any newer. But HC gets a lot of undue praise. Sure it might be a cool game, but it's such a fucking messy game that has explosions everywhere, shit moving everywhere with no indication if it can hurt you or not, and flashing colors. That said, it's still a glorified NES game with thousands of explosions for no reason other than just to show off.

>>1754495

THANKS NIGGER IMMA GO RAPE SOME SHIT

>>1757826
Come to think of it, that seems to have been a common fashion trend for 80's/90's yuppies. Patrick Bateman is technically a Yuppie, and I think he mentioned he was in his early 30s.

What does that even mean. "Feels like an NES game"? Explain how Strider, or Golden Axe, or Hellfire "feel like NES games" instead of Arcade ports.

>>1766724
He's 27.

>>1766715
This smells a little bit like retard console war logic quite honestly.

>>1766732
Close enough, thanks.