/vr/ - Retro Games

>>1685358
What the actual fuck.

Seeing this thing makes my blood boil slightly.

>>1685358
Miracle piano. Learn how to play a piano on the NES. Actually worked and wasn't bad!

>>1685457
>software toolworks
does that piano summon weegee?

>>1685479
Heard if you hit the key 57 octaves below middle c, Mavis beacon comes out of the tv and bitch slaps the shit out of you.

>>1685358

>Great motivator for homework, chores, grounding, ect

why exactly would you want to motivate your kids to get grounded? and why wouldn't you just take and hide the system or the AC adapter? or why not just leave it as is and if your kids play it when they were told not to ground them more and spank their ass.

also, I would soooo take that NES apart and still play

The Gameboy compatible sewing machine.

>>1685358
What in hell. Just take the controllers.

>>1685358
>Trying combinations 1 - 9999
Wouldn't that actually be a game in and of itself?

>>1685505
That hook on the shackle end inserts into one of the holes where a case screw is. So you'll pretty much have to destroy the case to get around the lock.
Easier to just saw through the thing, or sit there and check 0000, 0001, 0002, 0003, 0004, ...

>>1685358

>>1685519
>implying your mom isn't a typical stupid woman who just turns the last number once to lock it

>>1685519

No, that'd be math homework, since anyone sensible would just give up when they realized how many combinations that was.

>>1685515

Back in middle school, one of my friends got grounded, and instead of taking his entire N64 away, his parents just yanked the controllers out. The only thing he and his brother could do was turn on the game and watch the demo play out.

That must have been a special kind of hell.

>>1685358

A 15cent hacksaw and 15 minutes later that NES is unlocked.

>>1685645
It's just mounted into the worthless plastic underneath. A little twist and you'll wreck the bottom of the case but it'll still work fine.

>>1685358
geez can you imagine try to break this shit off your nes

>>1685358
Op. I had this lock. My mom bought it at a dollar store as a joke to me. I forgot all about this...

>>1685496
>57 octaves below middle c
can you imagine how long that keyboard would be, hundreds of keys

when i was younger my mother would take our games if we misbehaved, although rarely, and put them in the cupboard above the refrigerator.

she didn't know that my brother and i knew...
we made sure to put the games back before she got home from work

>>1685358
>Lifts NES
>Lock slides-off
>Start playing
The answer is so simple it hurts

>>1688104
The combination hunk sat on the edge of the slot and that tab went into a screw hole, if I remember, right. It didn't really work that well, but it kinda sorta almost did...sometimes.

>>1685428
>>1685397
something wrong with parents trying to get their kids to do homework instead of playing videogames? wat?

>>1688208
Homework is for nerds, old man.

>>1688228
have fun slopping around in the troughs, plebian

>>1685509
Do go on.

>>1688208
Do you think the way to do that is putting a huge lock on the console?
What if your son is a filthy casual and doesn't care about video games? Huh? Now he'll never do his homework!

>>1688074
Assuming that middle C for such a keyboard would be in the same position relative the key-ends as on a standard 88-key piano, there would be 1384 keys, I think. I could have done the maths wrong, but on a standard 88-key piano, the first three keys on the left side precede C1 and middle C is C4 and the final key is C8.
The middle C of a board that has at least 57 octaves below middle C must have, therefore, 57 octaves above it as middle C on an 88-key keyboard has three octaves below it plus three additional keys, three octaves above it plus an additional key and the octave to which it belongs. Ergo, ((#octaves below middle C × 2) × 12 keys per octave) + 3 keys below C1 + the final C on the board's right side + 12 keys in the octave to which middle C belongs = 1384 keys.

>>1688241
Well it's an option. taking the controllers away or the entire system might work, but some kids are seriously sly motherfuckers and will find it.

your second comment is just illogical as fuck.

>>1688245
Though the term "middle C" originated because of its position on an 88-key piano, it doesn't mean it literally has to be in the physical middle.

>>1688130
I realized that after the post, but figured it would still be easy enough barring any exterior damage.

>>1685457
my dad has something like this for msx

>>1685358
Now they will spend all day trying every code instead of doing homework.

>>1685632
You don't even know mang. I never got grounded, but one time my cousin and I rented Mischief Makers, but IIRC he forgot he lent out his N64 controller to a friend, so we couldn't do anything but watch the intro screen play over and over and over for a whole day.

>>1688260
Well, if middle C remains defined at C4 and the keys go only up to C8, then there would be 700 keys, including the three below the lowest C and C8.

>>1685496
Spit. All over my screen.

>>1685358
That one fishing sonar they made for the Game Boy. That was a seriously weird idea.

>>1689150
OK... I knew about the camera, printer and sewing machine.
Not about this one, though. What the hell.

>>1688236
Training system for the kids forced to work at Foxconn.

>>1688246
>watch parent open lock
>you now have the combination, allowing you to bypass the lock as you please without them ever knowing or being able to do anything about it

>>1685632
>Back in middle school, one of my friends got grounded, and instead of taking his entire N64 away, his parents just yanked the controllers out. The only thing he and his brother could do was turn on the game and watch the demo play out.

When I was grounded at one time, parents took away the keyboard for the PC so I couldn't use it. But they left the mouse and gamepad there, so I could boot up and play emulators. This was 15 years ago though.

>>1688423
>>1688245
Rather than the physical amount of keys end their length, I'd be more interested what kind of sound would a key like that make. Though I imagine it would be such a low frequency that it wouldn't manifest as audible sound, but rather some kind of vibration.

Actually, no, it would be just silence: we are talking about a digital keyboard here (since it hooks up to a NES), so the speakers attached to it could not produce those frequencies.

Or even if they could, the key in question would be too far away from the speakers themselves.

>>1689214
"Boy, go to the other room if you want to play Nintendo"

>>1685496
That note would take centuries to go through one wave period.

>>1685519
Shit no!

But using a more sophisticated *strategy* and reducing the amount of guesses, now that would a bit of an *adventure*!

>>1685358
That's fucking hilariously awesome

>>1689150
>>1689168
Oh come one, just IMAGINE IT!

Your dad: "Alright, son. I gotta make a man out of you! Put down that gameboy and go fishing with me."

You bring it along without anyway without him knowing, along with the sonar. You whip it out on him when you get to the lake

Your dad: "Boy I thought I told you not to bring that contraption! You lily livered queer!"

You: "Wait, look! On this screen you can see where all the fish are!"

Your dad: I'm proud of you, son. Sorry I killed Spot last week.

>>1691402
Oh man, I had something like that for my Color, it was pretty amazing I thought....until one of the joystick prong things broke off due to how it was designed.

This bad boy allows you to play Game Boy cartridges in your N64 and PSX

>>1691418

This weird case turned your game boy into an arcade-lookalike machine.

Awkward.

>>1689150

I have to have this.

The NES Hands Free Controller consisted of a back-to-front backpack-type device that strapped onto the front of the player and was compatible with all of the console's games (multiplayer an' all) except those that required the NES' light gun or zapper. The directional pad was replaced by a chunky joystick that could be manipulated by the player's chin whilst the functions of the 'A' and 'B' buttons were carried out by softly 'sipping' or 'puffing' from and into a bendy tube that stuck out from the top of the chunky piece of kit. Meanwhile, the 'Select' and 'Start' buttons could be activated by sipping or puffing more forcefully. In addition, two dials on the front of the unit enabled the sensitivity of the breath inputs to be tinkered as well as switching around the sipping or puffing functions.

The Hands Free Controller was a non-profit device sold directly through Nintendo's Customer Care line and made available in three sizes. Due to its target audience it was distributed in limited numbers, but the idea behind it was certainly both heartfelt and novel.

>>1689316
you'd have to split 440hz into two, 57 times to get the hz. stupidly low frequencies at that point.

>>1691414
>Video Game
>Game
>Game
>Game
>Video Game
>Game
>Game
>Game
>Video Game
>Game

U-Force, a motion controller for the NES. Words cannot express how truly bad this thing was.

>>1691430
I have a thing for these type of things. Wish it was marketed more.

My dad used to take the power cord to work with him.

>>1691441

>there were people out there who made this to allow disabled kids to play vidya

God's work.

Suncom Mother Ship.
Turns a NES pad into a joystick. Wondering what the mechanism inside was like, or it's reliability, as its translating the direction movements rotated.

>>1689214
>watched mom open the lock, got the digits.
>feeling like a boss.
>fuck, she changed the combination since then.

>>1685358
Looks like 8 characters, 4 character sequence. 4096 possible permutations and the system is left in the home with a child? I give it ~6 six days to a patient kid and maybe one or two with a persistent kid with nothing to do spin the lock and listen to music in his room. It'd take just under 11.5 hours at ten seconds each permutation to go through. 1/2 chance to get it in 6.25 hours fueled by crack like addiction to video game stimulation.

Fat chance that thing will be useful.

>>1691745
I agree. Bought one at a garage sale for 5 bucks, I only kept it because it had box and instructions, maybe it will be worth 6 bucks some day

>>1691418
Heeey, I've seen this before.
They had these at the first ever Pokemon event I went to.

>>1685358
>not just taking the controllers away

Who fucking buys these things?

>>1691745
Playing Top Gun,MiG 29 soviet fighter and Tengen's after burner port with that thing felt satisfactory

>>1692353
Probably the same people that bought all the useless stuff that Billy Mays advertized

>>1692458
>dissing Based Billy Mays

I have a PSX Dexdrive somewhere.
That was pretty nifty.

>>1692138
If you're a non-prodigy little kid who doesn't know how to calculate permutations, 4096 may as well be a bajillion.

>>1685632
>when they realized how many combinations that was

Dude, it's 10,000. That's how many it is. This isn't an advanced combinatorics problem, it's a counting problem. The combination can be 0000, 0001, ..., 9999. So, 10,000 options.

so what game system had the most peripherals ?

>>1691418
Too bad they didn't bother to implement sound. Instead, have to play Pokemon to a single ear raping tune on permaloop.

>>1691435
>Nintendo, ON!
>Sega, GO HOME!

Why does Nintendo always have to make their consoles/handhelds be everything from dialysis machines to geiger counters? Who greenlit all of this shit? The ROI has to be terrible across the board.

>>1688208
Hey, if the guy doesn't want to study to begin with, shouldn't force him.

>>1688228
Are you retarded?

>>1691418
>>1691426

Oh boy! I can't wait for my Gameboy games to miraculously transform into N64 games!

>>1691426

What was the fantastic built-in game?

>>1693113
What are some of these devices? Most everything I know about was made by third parties, not Nintendo.

>>1691775
I wish I could do that to my wife's iPad + et .

>>1693115
Seriously? He's being sarcastic.

>>1693623
that's why you don't buy stuff which doesn't allow a battery to be removed.

>>1693401
The ones in this thread. But if they're all third party then it's still strange that these people seem to flock to them.

>>1693783
Think of how smart phones and tablets now are used as the base of various tools. The Game Boy is effectively the 90's version of this.

It's an affordable, portable, battery powered unit with a built in screen and basic user inputs. Instead of building a full device, just use the Game Boy as your system base.

>>1691775
>dad used to take out computer keyboard to work with him
>when he got back I told him I couldn't do my homework since I needed the computer to do it

every single time

>>1685632
>That must have been a special kind of hell

My mom did exactly that when I first got CTR. It was torture.

Not necessarily weird, just......unnecessary. The design doesn't sit well with me either, looks like an 8 track tape deck

>>1688228
oh you youngins and your doohickies.

>>1689303
>11 years ago
Parents broke all my pc game cd's in my face, every single one BUT Rebel Assault, which they couldn't break because it was a fucking old school TDK cd...

They also took the mouse away... so i learnt how to use the computer by keyboard only.

I trashed the living shite out of mame xmvsf

>>1688245
Thanks rain man!!!

>>1694091
You must have been a very naughty boy

>>1688236
it had a japan-only game called mario family that just sewed out designs from the gameboy color screen

>>1691426
>on ANY playstation

false advertising

>>1694452
Leave them alone...they didn't know...

>it improves player "hand-feel"

Why did they put hand-feel in quotes.

>psssh, kids today with their "hands" and "somatosensory system"
>when I was a kid we all had numb hands and we were lucky to have them!

>>1694061
>dat 90s dialect
>eating the rules

>>1694678
gulf war gameboy didn't need body armor

>>1694091
What the fuck did you do, kill someone?

>>1694061
I'm the type of person that would have bought this.

http://www.snescentral.com/article.php?id=0901

I really wanted this for my ZX Spectrum when I was a kid.

I've since seen it on Youtube and its slow and noisy as fuck so I'm glad I never got it

>>1685358

>>1694678
>three Game Boy coordinated colors... black, gery, and fuchsia

Three colors. Three sons. Who's the lucky one?

>>1694849
The kind who would pay $50 to not have to manually remove your carts from the console?

>>1694937
What the fuck

>>1691738
true story, atari has the term videogame trademarked. That's why we call them video games.

>>1693140
the tweetling music slow drives you mad, the free game is insanity.

>>1694750
It was also completely destroyed and had the internals replaced.

>>1692984
>Dude, it's 10,000. That's how many it is. This isn't an advanced combinatorics problem, it's a counting problem. The combination can be 0000, 0001, ..., 9999. So, 10,000 options.

>>1694882
Who approved this?

>>1692842
Even if you didn't know how many, the fact of the fucking matter is that your NES is locked up and that shit ain't going away. So you wack out a few numbers and reset it back to what it is in case the remember. Then when the parental units slap that shit on and head out for the night or whatever you can unlock it and and play and stick it back on. Breaking that shit and not letting them know effectively gives you free play time you'd otherwise not have. There's no reason not to sit down and brute the combination.

>>1685519
No shit, only 4 digits? hour or two tops.

Whats dumber:
>implying my mother would be smart enough to remove the cartridge before putting this thing on.

>>1691794
Why not just make a joystick controller on its own? Seems much easier than doing that.

>>1695623
They had to pay a licensing fee to make NES compatible hardware. Since this just slips over an existing controller it sidestepped that rule.

>>1694937
>But why needle the competition
The marketing boys at 80s Nintendo must be a hoot.

>>1694937
>mfw my mother kept using her's knitting machine (a regular one) until it stopped working.

Looking at that ad just feeds my feels, I actually think the concept is adorable but it's obviously a horrible idea.

>That lame puns.
They want to see me cry and rage at the same time!

>>1694678
>you will never play a game boy with a backlit brown screen

That looks really neato.

>>1685358
Got something for you OP
http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/nes/

>>1696663
Wow, I used to spend a lot of time on this site.

>>1696685
The CYOA games were especially good.
Too bad it's essentially dead now, no real interesting things going on.

>>1696690
Yeah, the Halloween ones? I was marathoning them a while back. Then they kind of just stopped doing them. The Abobo thing was their last big hurrah, I guess.

>>1696693
That was one of the final actual good things on the internet, everything just seemed to die off at around 2009

I've only been deprived of video games once, and I thank my parents in retrospect.

Back in seventh grade, my grades had dropped so badly, that by eighth grade, my parents decided to start the school year by disconnecting my PS1 and storing it away. I secretly took it and played RE 2 a few times on it over the course of a few weeks but my grades made a massive jump. I went from being a C- student to consistently A+ in everything but math, which I maintained at an A average.

Great life lesson.

>>1696792
>Grades in school affected by things at home
Anon if you needed homework to boost your shitty test scores you had far worse problems than video games.

>>1694184
>>1694756
Probably just awful parents.

>We'll destroy all of his possessions, that'll teach him!

>>1696802
Not him. For some schools homework counts for a significant amount. I generally aced all my tests but typically got C's and D's and occasionally F's in heavily weighted classes because I didn't do homework. I don't mean like occasionally. I mean I never did any homework at all for during elementary up until my final year in high-school barring once class I had to complete a years worth of homework for a single class before I could get signed out of that class. It took me three class days.
My tests were rarely lower than 80 and typically hovered around low to mid 90s. Still teachers were all over homework and shit. I never bothered with homework because there was no reason to bother with it. Even with one of the info-centric classes I had I still had a habit of managing to be absent regularly sometimes missing all but one day a week.
A lot of schools grade on sliding scales and discipline. I also regularly got 'potential points' knocked off because I'd turn in class projects twice as large as other students in half the time and slept or fucked around for the remaining time. Which was bullshit anyway.

>>1697627

Wat r paragraphs?

>>1697695

>>1697684
>he used carriage returns to mark paragraphs, like a fucking literate person would, expecting the formatting system to format them correctly.
We all know... do you?

>>1697695
>>1697698
>The world of STD
>STD
Oh boy.

>>1697715
Heh, didn't notice that.

>STD entertainment

>>1697715
In the ad's case what did STD meant?

>>1697698
Oh come on, Propads were baller as SHIT. The Genesis one was really comfy!

>>1697695
>14 Hours Game Boy
>2 Hours Game Gear

>>1697698
I have the bottom one, I really like it.