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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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9218506 No.9218506 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

You encounter an elf.

What do /tg/

>> No.9218531

check what level my erection can get to before i can initiate rape.

>> No.9218533

That's not an elf.

>> No.9218543

RELEASE THE MAGMA!

>> No.9218547

Diagnose her with neck-down alopecia.

>> No.9218553

Avert eyes. Say hello.

>> No.9218569

>>9218553

She says hello, and gives a little snort.

>> No.9218583

I take a series of photographs of her face to end the silly threads on /tg/ about what kind of humans most resemble elves.

>> No.9218626
File: 270 KB, 777x1000, rahda, heir to ass.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9218626

You see another elf.... this one is blue.

What do?

>> No.9218648

Roll Initiative.

>> No.9218651

>>9218626
OH FUCK. DON,T BE FOOLED, GUISE, THAT'S A DROW IN DISGUISE. KILL IT WITH FIRE.

>> No.9218683

>>9218626
Avert eyes again. Say hello. Try to remember if I took my meds this morning. Wonder where I am - fairly sure I didn't have all this water in my house earlier.

>> No.9218740
File: 109 KB, 378x366, ese culo.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9218740

>>9218626
Me gustaría tener sexo con este culo.

>> No.9218777

>>9218740
Rest of elf optional?

>> No.9218791

>>9218626
i ask if she needs help washing her back

>> No.9218807

>>9218791

She does.

What do you plan to do with this information?

>> No.9218873
File: 53 KB, 896x512, 99m2sq03G7XH.mp4_snapshot_04.15_[2010.01.23_22.38.21].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9218873

NO PIN-PIN! It's just a mirage!

>> No.9218880

>>9218807
I help her wash her back, obviously.

>> No.9218882

>>9218807
i wash her back and then give her a shoulder massage afterwards

>> No.9218896
File: 58 KB, 896x512, 99m2sq03G7XH.mp4_snapshot_05.30_[2010.01.23_23.18.31].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9218896

>>9218873

>> No.9218948

>>9218807
Notify reliable friend about location and circumstances. Test for allergies. Be courteous. Wash back.

>> No.9218973

>>9218948
>>9218882

I need some rollings.

>> No.9219040

>>9218973
You'll have to be more specific.

>> No.9219063

>>9219040

....

Of the dice kind.

>> No.9219078

>>9218777
Simplemente ese culo.

>> No.9219092
File: 73 KB, 600x849, 1258995850451.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219092

I don't really care what /tg/ would do/does, but I would like to see more naked hot elf women.

>> No.9219105

>>9218896
What is wrong with those crabs in that picture, were they born retarded or does the Mad Googlier work for the guys who make Wakfu?

>> No.9219107

>>9219063
...
How many of what dice?

>> No.9219130
File: 13 KB, 123x92, 123273_CN_TN.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219130

Could someone with D&DI post the full pic of this?

It's from the book, Seekers of the Ashen Crown.

Because NOSE ELF!

>> No.9219137

>>9219107

1d20.

Gah.

>> No.9219161

>>9219130
is that a jewish elf?

>> No.9219170

rolled 17 = 17

>>9219137
So many possibilities...

>> No.9219187
File: 347 KB, 813x1200, 1271232514675.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219187

>> No.9219203

>>9219170

Success.

You manage to notify a friend and skillfully wash her back.

However, the not-actually elf in the OPic is getting jealous looking.

What do?

>> No.9219221
File: 58 KB, 398x600, Prof Gydd Nephret.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219221

>>9219130
Here ya go.

>> No.9219230
File: 1.01 MB, 1600x1200, FinalDemise_1600x1200.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219230

>>9219161

Eberron history elf.

>> No.9219234

RELEASE THE KRAKEN

>> No.9219239

rolled 12 = 12

>>9219203
Offer identical service. Not playing favourites, here.

>> No.9219244

>>9219187
Necessito mas elfas por favor con ese culo.

>> No.9219248

>>9219221

Thanks.

There's something awesome about an elf with a NOSE.

>> No.9219281

>>9219244
Necessite hablar ingleses amigo.

>> No.9219282

>>9219239

You attempt to calm down the kor(not-an-elf), but Radha, Heir to Ass, says, "no, this guy is mine."

Fortunatly, your friend shows up.

>> No.9219348

rolled 18 = 18

>>9219282
Politely correct her. I 'm nobody's bitch.
Oh, and try to determine where exactly I am, how I got here, how these two fair maidens got here, and what the hell's going on. Again, politely.

>> No.9219386

>>9219348

Having rolled a 18 on your WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, you realize it's a dream, and so don't care about why it's all wet.

Sorry for the cop out, but I.... don't feel like running this anymore.

>> No.9219401

>>9218896

when this happened?

>> No.9219434
File: 231 KB, 888x634, elfmaids.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219434

>>9219386
'sokay. I'm just timewasting right now anyway.

Perhaps I will simply post elves.

>> No.9219473

>>9219401
Episode 22

>> No.9219498

I force her to take my knot.

>> No.9219518
File: 56 KB, 312x312, puke.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219518

>>9219498

>> No.9219535
File: 179 KB, 565x800, 1220412406150.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219535

KILL KILL KILL

>> No.9219553

>>9219105
We aren't looking at the crabs.

>> No.9219570
File: 135 KB, 602x900, 1268626226044.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219570

>> No.9219618
File: 140 KB, 1400x991, 1271169838068.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219618

>> No.9219631

>>9218506

"A thousand pardons madam, I did not realize you were.... I will leave now."

"No, stay. I find you interesting."

"I apologize, I must go.

"I am sorry, have I offended?"

" No. Madam, it's just well....you're naked."

"What is wrong, is my form not pleasing."

"No..I mean yes...I mean, it would be impolite to stare."

"Is nudity a taboo in your culture?"

WHAT DO?

>> No.9219639

>>9219618

DAT CAT!

>> No.9219652
File: 409 KB, 799x599, 1254803859354.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219652

>> No.9219754
File: 259 KB, 1107x831, 1242014647681.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219754

>> No.9219970
File: 159 KB, 600x905, 1271244527982.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9219970

>> No.9219992

>>9218506

Kill it for xp, vendor trash the bangles and jewelry, laugh about it at the camp fire that evening.

>> No.9220291

>>9219631
"Yeah, man."
"Oh, okay."

>> No.9220314

>>9219992

You didn't get any exp.

Why should you?

You failed the skill challenge.

>> No.9220344

>>9219631

'No, it's just that I'm a eunuch you see, and you are reminding me...'

'Oh, shit, sorry mate, I didn't know.'

'Nah, it's alright.'

>> No.9220381

>>9219631
>WHAT DO?
Reply that no, it is not taboo but it is merely considered polite not to stare no matter how beautiful the person is.

>> No.9220414

I summon a small horribly deadly beast, and tell the elf submit or I will kill you, try anything funny and this frog will kill you. Try anything against the frog, well, you cant, elves dont harm nature.
Bend over bitch.

>> No.9220434

>>9220414

>elves dont harm nature

.... what evidences do you have of this?

>> No.9220675
File: 438 KB, 669x950, 1271227941596.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9220675

>> No.9220696
File: 172 KB, 560x799, slaves_of_accretia.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9220696

Enslave it.

>> No.9220718

>>9219631
I loled, cause I just watched Firefly yesterday with a buddy, and the 'Mrs. Reynolds' ep was on, and this reminds me of the scene in his quarters.

The chick that plays Saffron is SO cash.

>> No.9220757
File: 4 KB, 160x130, e1baa32b07fbe654.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9220757

>>9220718

You...mean me?

>> No.9220772

>>9218506
Realize that I'm a dorf, and order it to get the fuck out of my fort before I cut down ALL the trees.

>> No.9221054
File: 495 KB, 800x1200, 1271238282782.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9221054

>> No.9221219

>>9220757
MARRY ME

>> No.9221247
File: 16 KB, 485x478, 1244332645279.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9221247

.....

>> No.9221367
File: 37 KB, 594x458, christina-hendricks-.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9221367

>>9221219
[Mal is disconcerted to find Saffron in his bed, wearing only a bedsheet.]
Saffron: But we've been wed. Aren't… we to become one flesh?
Mal: Well, no, uh… we're still two fleshes here, and... I think... that your flesh oughta… sleep somewhere else.
Saffron: I'm sorry. When we talked, I'd hoped, but I—
[She gestures with her hands, losing the sheet. Mal turns away.]
Mal: Whoa, hey! Flesh. Um... Saffron... i-it... it ain't a question of pleasing me. It's more a question of what's...
[Mal, breathing heavily, strains not to look at the naked woman.]
Mal: ...um... of what's morally right.
Saffron: I do know my Bible, sir. "On the night of their betrothal, the wife shall open to the man as the furrow to the plow, and he shall work in her, in and again, till she bring him to his fall, and rest him then upon the sweat of her breast." [N]
[Cut to Mal, who is openly staring now.]
Mal: Whoa. Good Bible.
. . .
Mal: ...it's been a while—a long, damn while—since anybody but me took ahold of my plow…
. . .
[Saffron stands up from the bed and slowly approaches a stunned Mal.]
Saffron: If I'm wed, I'm a woman, and I'll take your leave to be bold. I want this. I swell to think of you in me.
[She looks down.]
Saffron: And I see that you do, too.
Mal: Oh, th-th— that's just, uh...
Saffron: Leave me at the nearest port. Never look upon me again. I'll make my way with the strength that you've taught me. Only let me have my wedding night.
Mal: [resignedly] Oh, I'm gonna go to the special hell.

>> No.9221526

>>9221367
lmao

>> No.9221545

>>9221054
Jesus fucking Christ Source please.

>> No.9221715

>>9221054
Wh... what is that from?

>> No.9221865

>>9218506
Inform her that inverted nipples can be a sign of breast cancer. Politely suggest that if that's a relatively recent development she should see her doctor.

Then, the rape happens.

>> No.9221953
File: 450 KB, 1599x1138, 1269236188835.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9221953

>>9221367
i laughed at 'special hell' every single time in that episode
also, christina hendricks may be the sexiest thing to ever be shown on tv

>> No.9221978

>>9221953
She doesn't seem to understand that pushing your tits up so much that you seem to get a second, upward-pointing pair, is not attractive, though.

>> No.9222004
File: 5 KB, 184x184, coach.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9222004

>>9218506
I HOPE SHE LIKES FOOTBALL

YEAH

>> No.9222055

>>9221953
I offer to hold her breasts, as I am sure her back is tired.

>> No.9222069

>>9221978
They're being squished due to their large size relative to the dress' bust, not being pushed up. DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING?

>> No.9222166

>>9222069
I know a push-up bra when I see one.

>> No.9222179

I shoot her in the face with my bow.

Then I rape the corpse.

>> No.9223989

>>9219221
Who is this? Is this a character?

>> No.9224972

>>9223989

She's a side character in a 4e adventure.

>> No.9224985

>>9224972
gotcha.

>> No.9225023
File: 102 KB, 600x592, 1190456583045.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
9225023

WELL, WELL, WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE?

and then... well, you know

>> No.9225044

Come on, guys, don't.

>> No.9225089

Ignite

>> No.9225183

Bend her over the nearest solid object, and GO TO TOWN. And yes, that's a fucking euphemism. Or an euphemism for fucking. Both. Whatever.

>> No.9225190

Take more peyote soup.

>> No.9225195

What? Sometimess a woman that fine needs to be romanced first. We're not trolls after all.

>> No.9225200

>>9218626 I would just motorboat those.

>> No.9225288

How can't people see that anime is the gayest fucking shit on earth.

>> No.9226958

>>9219105
Obligatory
Gay test : if you noticed the crabs first, I have bad news for you ....

>> No.9226979

BRACE MY SOUL FOR INCOMING XENO MIND RAPE.

EMPEROR PROTECT ME!

>> No.9226991

Kill it.

>> No.9226996

PURGE THE ALIEN!!!

>> No.9227004

>>9226958
but but... there aren't any crabs...?

>> No.9227779

>>9227004
Virgin nerd test : If you haven't noticed the crabs at all, even after you're done fapping to the chick in the center, I have bad news for you ..

>> No.9227933

fuck it

>>
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