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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.71534972 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Can we have a greentext thread, like back in ye olde days?

>> No.71535010

Fuck, no.
There's very little more pathetic things than fake stories with exactly 0 possibility of happening in actual sessions, written by a bunch of losers who didn't even got to play RPGs.

>> No.71535027

you must be fun at parties I bet

>> No.71535050

Hi newfag, do you need your diaper changed, you fucking disgrace?

>> No.71535148

Haha GREENTEXTS, I love them OP, this one is my favorite, it always makes me laugh, lol

>> No.71535520

>> No.71535569

lol thanks for sharing Mark, I'll be sure to share this with Chelsea when I get home from picking up the little guy, things have been hard on the wife since Jerome left.

>> No.71537394

When exactly did /tg/ turn into such a shithole?

>> No.71537500

Fall 2016

>> No.71537520


>> No.71537700

>> No.71537842

I love this greentext threads.

>> No.71537879

>> No.71537895

(You right now)

>> No.71537999

>> No.71539608


>> No.71540456 [SPOILER]  [DELETED] 

This thread reeks of reddit

>> No.71540846

You should probably go back then.

>> No.71540910

No. The old days are gone, there is no coming back. Only acceptance.

>> No.71541017

>> No.71542455

When people would rather circlejerk about stories they were never part of rather than making their own. Don't waste your time here, go play RPGs.

>> No.71542534

>> No.71542557

same faggot

>> No.71542580

As little it means, get rekt faggit.

>> No.71542715

I have a few shorter ones I can share.
>Navajo Noonan, MILF huntsman who never scored
>The tragedy of Darth Hakan the stubborn who died an avoidable death
>The tale of Atlas, the man whose purity of soul transformed the heart of a fiend

>> No.71542802

>Navajo Noonan, MILF huntsman who never scored
Is this a play on words or a contradiction? And which parts? MILF that never scored or huntsman that never scored or a huntsman of MILFs that never scored?

>> No.71542820

It was a RWBY game. It was a play on words.

>> No.71542895

>Darth Hakan
I love a good sith legend, please elaborate.

>> No.71542939

As much as I enjoyed RTs work for RvB, I will never understand the appeal of this. Probably my /a/utism.

>> No.71543019

Not even really star wars, it was a Digimon game I was running.
>Party is going to gather the plot macguffin from the snow area of the Digital world
>Meet another human (an NPC) who was hiding his face with a cloak and some sort of distortion ability, the typical brooding edgelord type
>Party tries to talk to him
>Tells them to stay out of his way and let him collect the macguffins instead so they can go home since that's what they want, right?
>Says he's headed to get the one in the snow temple, not to follow him
>Party, being the party, follows him
>Finally catch up to him
>He does the usually edgy character song and dance of "you should have listened to me, I work alone, now we must fight"
>They fight
>NPC has a bootleg L96
>Hakan wants it
>Wrestles it out of his grip after a few tries, proceeds to play keepaway with the guy
>Goes pretty well, lets the rest of the group beat down his Champion-level digimon, a Dorumon
>Meanwhile, have a set amount of turns before more enemies show up
>They pass the threshold, new enemies show up
>Shit hits the fan
>NPC gets his rifle back
>Smacks Hakan over the head
>He already took a hit before, so this downs him
>Makes death save (in DDA the death saves are 3d6)
>Natural. Fucking. 3.
>Have to describe how everything goes cold then numb as his body dissolves into data before everything goes black
>NPC wasn't trying to kill him, make him roll sanity
>Torment check
>He has a mental breakdown, meanwhile it takes the whole party to stop the guy's digimon from just murdering the NPC
>Turns out the NPC was the antagonist they Friendship speech'd down a couple of sessions back (Fantastic argument + Good rolls)
>Party is currently on a quest to gain the approval of the 10 Warrior spirits to revive him and is actively receiving aid from the NPC
It was a dark moment, I didn't feel good after watching a PC die. Was the first time one had died in one of my games.

>> No.71543036

Huntsmen are what the male version of huntresses are called.

>> No.71543094 [SPOILER] 


>> No.71543116


>> No.71543184

Not a fucking clue what you went on about.

>> No.71543519

>old man with mage daughter
who is he talking about?

>> No.71545054


>> No.71545067

Alright, hotshot, what's so fake and unbelievable about this story?

>> No.71545075

The fact that you believe I'm willing to read what looks to be 50+ posts about someone's fictional game for starters.

>> No.71545143

Everyone who hates greentext threads is so unbelievably cancerous. Admit that you hate /tg/ and leave. You know how someone likes you? They listen to the stories of your good times. You fags never want to, and not just that, but you can't even let us do it in peace. You hate /tg/. Fuck off.

>> No.71545203

You know how someone is retarded? They'll politely sit there while you show them 40 pictures of your adopted neo-pets. Not even real pets, your fake internet pets.

>> No.71545305

You hate /tg/. Fuck off.

>> No.71545313

This story sucks.

>> No.71545358

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>> No.71545396

>> No.71545488

>Critical Role tourists
>Election tourists
>4chan's traffic going up further and further as the years go on

>> No.71545571

Ok this one got me

>> No.71545587

All these fags and not a single good post.

>> No.71545591

>> No.71545600

I was going to rag on you for continuing that trend but you posted one of my all time favourites.

I think your post one ups this one.

>> No.71545616

>The Hung
I was there. Shame how it was forgotten.

>> No.71545724

Elf a cute.

>> No.71545801

This is one of my favorites.

>> No.71545813

Technically, the number of gays remains the same.

>> No.71545815

Not if he's reviving ancient gays.

>> No.71545861

Meme all you want faglord, but the Sir Bearington always makes me smile and have warm fuzzy feeling.

>> No.71545870

>Civilian casualties are mounting to an unhealthy level


>> No.71545892

Lmao casual is reading hard retard??

>> No.71546055

>>Critical Role tourists
Critical Role is /tg/, and their setting became canon DnD 3 days ago with the release of Explorer's Guide to Wildermount.

>> No.71546119

Some things are not worth reading for

>> No.71546244

Just because it's /tg/ doesn't make it good.

>> No.71546696

No, we cannot. Content is "cringe".

>> No.71546811

why the fuck have I not seen this before
that was great

>> No.71546841

I don't get it

>> No.71546907

>>Natural. Fucking. 3.
Please. See. A. Doctor. About. Your. Asthma.

>> No.71546934

Warwick Davis' future

>> No.71546935


>> No.71546943

>Posting material for the Reddit karma farmers who lurk here

>> No.71546974

One of the better threads /tg/ has had recently.

>> No.71547272

Why are you so obsessed with reddit?

>> No.71547304

Evidently not because there’s no green text in that, OP.

That being said sure, just lemme get my ass outta bed and onto my computer, I’ve been trying to organize my folder of saved stuff so I’ll post some of it. Los Tiburon and the Crimson Bat incoming in, I dunno, ten minutes or so.

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>> No.71547514

I like how the detail that she has lots of curves is mentioned repeatedly but has no bearing on the story

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>> No.71547599

I don't get what is being referenced, but that's fucking hillarious.

>> No.71547600

And that's all I've organized so far. I need to get better at filenames, but at least once I'm done I'll finally be able to find things rather than trying to track them down by remembering which specific series of semi-random ten-digit numbers I need to look up...

>> No.71547642

This man was working on 5 different levels of crazy effective

>> No.71547645

It doesn't matter if it's fake, it's fun to read things unless they're laughably obvious and end with "and then everyone clapped", can you and the rest of the wet blankets get the fuck over yourselves?

>> No.71547692

>> No.71548041

reddit plz go

>> No.71548676

That was indeed a twist

>> No.71549073

That's pretty clever.

>> No.71549163


>> No.71549201


>> No.71549218

>like back in ye olde days?
What are those anon?

>> No.71549331

The fabled times of 2015 A.D.

>> No.71549450

2007 is when it was ruined, retard.

>> No.71549461


>> No.71549595


>> No.71549621

I'd dare to postulate that the golden age ended circa 2011, 2014 at the latest. The 2016 summer migrations were not what ended it, it was in decadence long before.

>> No.71549872

All according to keikkaku

>> No.71550008

Been here since 2010 and I believe the old ways can return if faggots like you just fuck off

>> No.71550732

>fake stories with exactly 0 possibility of happening in actual sessions
I can understand these kinds of complaints in other boards, but the whole point of /tg/ is to make shit up and play from your imagination, if the people who can convince others of the bullshit they say really happened then they deserve a medal.

>> No.71551023

See, everyone complains that greentexts could never actually happen, but this one I 100% believe.

>> No.71551089

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>> No.71551701

this is a /k/ greentext, not /tg/

>> No.71551795

Why do crabs always have the most interesting stories in these threads

>> No.71551876

crabs are based

>> No.71552057

Reddit doesn't care. It just wants its reposts.

>> No.71552352

kek, saved

>> No.71553525

Damn, I forgot how lengthy this was. My memory is probably faulty but wasn't this being recounted around the same time as Britbongsteros?

>> No.71553752

Iroh, My man.

>> No.71556809

Good green texts are one of the only reasons I keep coming to /tg/, thanks annon.

>> No.71556888

Does anyone have a greentext or something talking about why in Lord of the Rings when Gimli asks for a hair of Galadriel, she ends up giving him three, and the significance of that?

>> No.71557978

It was funnier nine years ago.

>> No.71558031

Dunno. It's not the best writing.

>> No.71558766

>> No.71559162


>> No.71559354

It started as a dumb little excuse for fight scenes and cute girls that was made with a shoestring and two sticks of gum for a budget. No one who liked it took it seriously, it was honestly just some dumb fun. Eventually it started getting more budget and more drama, and that was fine to a point before the creator died and the main spark of fun disappeared with the show being left in the hands of the other two writers. Things only got worse when the creator's vampiric thrall Shane went mad from the absence of his master, leading to him writing "The letter" and running from RT ranting about his master's glory. From then on it was largely just a matter of increasing production quality but decreasing soul. Throughout its span so far it has undergone an utterly bizarre cycle of getting worse and worse but then a little better but then worse again then better but still not great. As the aforementioned cycle took place every time it entered a bad period it collected flaws that stuck even when the show started looking a little promising again. By this point the last volume was better than the preceding ones but the show has accumulated so many consistent flaws and dropped balls that it's ridiculous. I just miss the good old days when it was the fun kind of bad, instead of just normal bad.

>> No.71559626

>> No.71562213

But that does mean he's pulling a gay soul out of the Great Wheel, which may make Pandemonium a little better.

>> No.71562459

It is a silly place.

>> No.71562502

The punchline of this, resolutely, did not deserve to fuck me up that bad.

>> No.71562541

anyone have the one about Bard? from this party/group if I remember right

>> No.71562543

I remember this thread.
I even posted on this thread.

>> No.71562648

>> No.71562751

Does anyone have the greentext where you fucking kill yourself?

>> No.71563529

Behold, the best greentext.

>> No.71563533

>>71556888 (Checked)
I know the one you're talking about. though I don't have it (have an elf from my elf folder instead). The significance has to do with how another elf, I think one of their princes of whatever long ago had asked for a hair, and she had refused. So for her to give him not one, but THREE was a huge deal. Not sure why exactly three, it could be because of the significance of three. (3 simarils, 3 rings of the elves)
You hate /tg/, fuck off.

>> No.71563602

The Pandemonium might be a little better because of him, but material plane still gets a surplus of gays.

>> No.71563724

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>> No.71567160

I wept a single tear. HFY.

>> No.71567189

Autumn 2014, same as the rest of 4chan.

>> No.71567300

Came here looking for precisely this. Thank you, anon.

>> No.71567315

>> No.71567319

>election tourists whine when you make greentext threads on /tg/
>election tourists whine when you make greentext threads on /x/
Seriously, is there some memo that I didn't get? Are words a libtard invention now or does the color green trigger them?

>> No.71567963


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>> No.71568503

What is this gif from?

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>> No.71569423

ooo, I like this

>> No.71569428

>> No.71569622

poast some caps then

>> No.71570101

By your command

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>> No.71570173

good lad, brought some I haven't seen before

>> No.71570192

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A well-won old chestnut of a cap.

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>> No.71570659

What's your point? That doesn't make Critical Role tourists good posters. They're a bunch of secondaries to the hobby and it fucking shows.

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>> No.71571086


It was always shit, and it was always good. Folks like me collect and post over the years so the new shit can learn the old shit, and be just as good as it was. I have over a decade of sceencaps now, some just from the other day, some from before I even arrived in 2008. Reddit is nothing, internet points are nothing, all that matters is that the stories are saved and spread and typed. Not their realism, or what can be gained from them.
A lot of folks forget that I think.
Pic related from 2010, you might recognize some of the crazy 8 from back then... some things never change lol

>> No.71571098

the pic

>> No.71571117

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>> No.71571248

This greentext has informed almost all of my Drow civilizations, at least in part.

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>> No.71571559

Still haven't seen the recipe.

>> No.71571564


>> No.71571600

My favorite greentext, by a pretty wide margin.

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>> No.71572213

Alright I've run out of time. Later fa/tg/uys

>> No.71572853

See you, space cowboy.

>> No.71572913

This website is a festering corpse that we feast on like ghouls. No nostalgia will change that.

>> No.71573631

>> No.71573633

>Things only got worse when the creator's vampiric thrall Shane went mad from the absence of his master, leading to him writing "The letter" and running from RT ranting about his master's glory.

I'm sorry, are we still talking real life, or the show? Because you're gonna have to explain this one to me.

>> No.71573956

>> No.71574632

should of just buried the hatchet.

>> No.71575310

yes it does, it was a potential warning sign of the player possibly being a erp-type campaign derailer. insted it was a sign of the player being a good-ish weeaboo

>> No.71575606

My guess, Seton Academy. It's a story about a hardcore racist getting to terms with living in a multiracial society of animal-people.

>> No.71576037

I thought this happened last year... fuck

>> No.71576059

Tbh this story slaps

>> No.71576272

I don't mean to be down-putting, but, no.

>> No.71576744

I might as well dump some of the greentexts I've saved over the years.

>> No.71576753


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>> No.71576799

And that's all for tonight.

>> No.71576911

>> No.71576991

Take this

>> No.71577313

This greentext is responsible for a lot of shitty monk meme builds i saw in the years and i hate it

>> No.71577411

Creative, wholesome and fun. I wholeheartedly approve.

>> No.71578452

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>> No.71581582

>> No.71583430

That was fucking amazing.

>> No.71583636

>> No.71585471

>> No.71585526

>greentext thread
>first post isn't even greentext
Goddamn I hate Reddit karma farmers

>> No.71585558

I too love recycling jokes from Animaniacs and pretending that I came up with them.

>> No.71585594

Hahahaha, girls with d*cks! F*cking epic!

>> No.71586367

what a story

>> No.71587070

>> No.71588139

I never get tired of WW players getting dunked on.

>> No.71588154

>> No.71588578

I could be very wrong but I think he means the bandits from OOTS, the chief's daughter is a sorcerer if I recall correctly

>> No.71588999

>> No.71590606

Yup, that'd be the one.

>> No.71592166

content is "le cringe"
you're only supposed to rate it
based, cringe, based, based, cringe, based, cringe, cringe, cringe, based, cringe...

>> No.71592262

I would argue Summer of 2014.

>> No.71593923

>look at me, mom, I'm quoting fucking everyone!
fuck off

>> No.71594035

>thread about to fall off the board
>random post in the middle of the thread mysteriously gets a zero value reply
End yourself, Bumpfag.

>> No.71596154

I was reading, Einstein.

>> No.71596352

also, it's not much of a mystery when he's quoting half the fucking thread, is it

>> No.71598058

Lol some folks are just spiteful

>> No.71598188

Right on time, Bumpfag.

>> No.71598192

I do not understand why some people want to destroy what TG used to be about and why they want it gone.

>> No.71598377

Actually I'm multi-reply fag nigger
I don't think bumpfag can into racism. I think.

>> No.71598410

Some people see something nice and feel compelled to fuck with it, that's all.

>> No.71600740

Ah, so that's where the plot of Hiro the dense protagonist came from.

>> No.71603468

players love collecting random weird shit. My party ended our last campaign with
>8 "average" skeletons
>Box with infections pathogens
>4 Demon-Stone infused corpses
>Extremely dangerous virus sample
>Giant insectoid egg
>Undead Hans
>Giant Spider

>> No.71604057

You newfags don't know how to find old posts.

>> No.71605325

>Undead Hans

>> No.71606862

>> No.71608396

>When you're so into the story you forget your'e reading an image file and try to open an image in the image file

>> No.71610294

This actually made me cry laughing. My gf thought there was something wrong with me. Definitely one of my favorites.

>> No.71610429

It's a guy named hans, who was turned into an undead

>> No.71610921

>I haven't personally experienced these things so they can't possibly have happened

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>> No.71617206

actually worth the read

>> No.71620766

goood thread, reached image limit

>> No.71621634

Save what you like, spread it, and next thread share your favorites
It's that simple

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