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File: 987 KB, 1280x693, Loc-Nar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
50889437 No.50889437 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

>strike down the evil lich that's been threatening the kingdom
>loot his shit like any respectable adventurer
>finally unlock and open the last treasure chest
>see this

Wat do?

>> No.50889463

Close chest, wrap with adamantium chains, lock with magic, bury deep beneath my Church's primary temple in secret.

Glowy green stuff is always bad. Everyone knows that.

>> No.50889495

>>50889463 Sounds about right:

>> No.50889496

Probably turn on my friends to have the green orb. They'd obviously do the same so I just have to act first.

>> No.50889505

It doesn't actually matter at this point. If the Loknar is going to fuck with you, you're already dead. leave it right the fuck there, walk away, and hope it decides to ruin someone else's day today.

>> No.50889522

It seemed to turn out okay for the taxi driver, but I guess he never interacted with the thing, did he?

>> No.50889538

You, the player, realize the Lich was villain not for his own sake, but to protect the world from the Loknar.

Most characters would study it, letting it's fuckuppedness slip through their fingers and into the world.

The GM plans the sequel campaign that may or may not reseal it.

>> No.50889566

Is it edible?

>> No.50889571

I think it just didn't have to do much in that situation. That entire city was already as dark and nasty as cities get, and it didn't have to do anything to make the situation worse. The taxi driver probably got shanked for his pocket money or ran off the road by a drunk within a month. No need for the Loknar to impose.
Same with the nerd in the fantasy world. Simply existing there was enough to cause chaos and death, it just had to throw a new player into the mix to make the situation worse, and that's exactly what it did.

>> No.50889604
File: 513 KB, 1024x1558, Pimpin' Wizard.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I masturbate and jizz all over it, before hitting it as hard as I can with my phallic wizard's staff!

>> No.50889610

There's only one way to find out.

>> No.50889750


It's the pact.

>> No.50889834
File: 52 KB, 611x311, heavy-metal-movie-power-of-loc-nar.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.50889896

Fuck. This. Shit. I'm not dealing with that evil talking green orb. Close the chest, ward it with the strongest magic, wrap it with the strongest chains, guard it with my life until a 10/10 qt Taarna girl comes waltzing in.

>> No.50890041
File: 32 KB, 500x480, aaa.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I use the most powerful weapons at my disposal on it on the spot. Which, at the endgame, probably looks like fleeing to an appropriate distance and shooting a Portable Hole x Bag of Holding Arrow.

I don't know what Loknar is but I probably made things infinitely worse which just means I was keeping myself in character haha fuck

>> No.50890144
File: 7 KB, 133x133, uptheirons.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Challenge it to a duel in the Breastorium at the Nippopolos.

>> No.50890167

Close treasure chest and walk away.

>> No.50890176


Put it in my backpack to sell in town for 1 gold, duh!

>> No.50890195

I think I know where you're going with this

>> No.50890230
File: 1.58 MB, 400x300, 1460997166335.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

NOPE. Fuck this shit, I ain't gettin' paid enough for this! You fuckers can keep the money, I'm out!

>> No.50890409

Am I the only one who thought the orb was voiced by James Earl Jones?

>> No.50890815

I challenge it to a skald battle. I'm pretty sure that's in keeping with something an Eternal Hero would do.

>> No.50890997

Don't let it come in contact with corpses.

>> No.50891402

Knowing my party?

Immediately grab it and don't let our magic items expert identify it until the world ending earthquakes start

(this literally happened and the planet was destroyed, campaign over. DM forecast it a bunch too.)

>> No.50891623

I put my dick in it

>> No.50891743
File: 40 KB, 515x640, a647c4ec-b376-448c-bad0-4a529a1c0234..jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

The Pact is Vengeance!

(My Paladins always use the Oath of the Taarakians)

>> No.50892058

Were you playing The Apocalypse Stone?

>> No.50892116

In the movie, did they ever try hitting it with a sword? I bet no one ever tried that.

>> No.50892138

I roll to seduce.

>> No.50892284

>Wat do?

Ohfuck, it's the Loknar.

Close chest, start working out a way to get that goddamn Lich back, leave like we never touched anything, hope we managed to de-trigger whatever fucked-up prophecy just went off.

>> No.50892313

>Won't you take a ride, ride, ride
>On heavy metal

>> No.50892358

To this day, I can't eat Shepherd's Pie or any sort of mince, or even be near it without gagging. Just conceiving the idea makes me nauseous.

That fucking inn, man.

>> No.50892424

I understood that parody.

>> No.50893828

I didn't.

>> No.50894049

What the fuck is it?

>> No.50894066

I assemble all the bards.

>> No.50894081

>>50894049 the sum of all evils

>> No.50894094

Literally? well shit, as a paladin I'd cast detect evil, then promptly smite the fucking thing.

>> No.50894102

Good thing I'm surrounded by chickenshits because I CLAIM THE POWER FOR MY OWN **and damn the corruption that followS!+YY**==

>> No.50894115

I put a helm of opposite alignment on it

>> No.50894159

the obvious answer is assume it's evil, try to smite it with clerical goodness then forge a sword out of it when it becomes randomly purified

>> No.50894179

Touching it under any circumstances, even indirectly, lets it kill you. No save.

>> No.50894193

Well. Yeah. That trick just dumps it into the astral plane.

Who KNOWS what shit it can get up to once there.

>> No.50894195

I don't have to touch it to detect evil or smite it. I do have to hit it with a weapon that isn't a part of me, I could be a throwing weapon using Pally.

>> No.50894219

That only worked by pure luck of how naaru cycles go.

>> No.50894406

I don't even need to read the rest of the thread. I already found the best post in it.

>> No.50894438
File: 3.17 MB, 340x189, laughing skele-bomber.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

That sounds pretty cool

>> No.50894473


>> No.50894489

Yeah, Have a proficiency in Dats or throwing knives and such as a backup weapon just in case of evil orbs that kill you if you touch them.

>> No.50896214

>The sun is touching the box, which is touching the table, which is touching the ground, which I am standing on, and my boots are touching my socks, and my socks are touching me.


>> No.50896561

>not David with his sling

I'm doing this.

>> No.50896645

An episode of the American animated program "South Park" parodied the fantasy movie "Heavy Metal".

>> No.50896670

Feel free. I own any proceeds from it though!

>> No.50896769

>Casting detect evil
>On the Lok-Nhar
Had you seen the movie Scanners?
That fucking is so evil and so powerful it can even be use to summon old ones as you would summon monster 1.
Hrll,two badies in the movie try to summon on when they get the artifact: Uhluhtc.

>> No.50896821

I presumed my character would not know any of that and casts Detect Evil on things that seem to be alive and really any weapon or item powerful enough to be sentient and thus have alignment so as to avoid things like Charon's Claw.

>> No.50896864

i hit it with a hammer

>> No.50896911

Damn. That's pretty intense.

>> No.50896956

I use it as an energy source. What could go wrong?

>> No.50897177

Well, this can't be safe to leave around. [Mordenkainen's Disjunction].

>> No.50897316

I'm almost certain it could pass the save. It counts as a magic item right?

>> No.50897331

I believe there's a table for that. It starts at "detect faint evil" and ends at "unconscious for 2dx hours". In this case, though, you'd probably need to use the extended table.

>> No.50897348

>Hrll,two badies in the movie try to summon on when they get the artifact: Uhluhtc.
And the Lok-Nhar wiped the both of them out of existence. The damn thing is so fucking evil, that evil people shouldn't be using it, because it's so fucking evil.

>> No.50897376

either way i'd let the party know what i was doing beforehand and being that i know the magic tell them to seal it away immediately if i pass out.

>> No.50897379

D&D already has evil balls that kill you when you touch them, they're called Spheres of Annihilation.

>> No.50897401

>Spheres of Annihilation
Please stop Anon, you're making me laugh.

>> No.50897447
File: 76 KB, 640x467, 2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>implying luring people with the promise of free ice cream is not evil

>> No.50897463
File: 174 KB, 482x750, tumblr_o8u0t7Mrzv1sjr92ho1_r1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Is that the Green Sun? Depending on which group it is and who is DMing I either keep my mouth shut or warn the rest of the party that the campaign is about to fall down some stairs.

>> No.50897511

The Sphere itself is not evil, the promise of free ice cream inside of the Sphere is evil. The Lok-Nhar would tell you that it's got free ice cream inside it, which makes it an intelligent evil Sphere of Annihilation.

>> No.50897519
File: 230 KB, 550x600, 1433135680272.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

You didn't read even a single reply, huh.

>> No.50897563

I'll bite

What the fuck is it?

>> No.50897635


>> No.50897647

I read a lot of them but there's a goddamn hat in front of the filename.

>> No.50897653

It's loc nar the sum of all evil. And it will definitely fuck up your day. I even bet that lich became a lich either by its influence or to imprison it. Either way you're all fucked if you open it up. But mind you the entire universe isn't fucked. Only the bits with loc nar in it.

>> No.50897686
File: 164 KB, 1585x787, Untitled.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.50897762
File: 40 KB, 550x453, 1439679994318.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Fair point then.

With a bit more context provided, if my party has enough Knowledge (Arcana/History/Religion/Forbidden-Lore) to know what the hell that thing is, we probably slam the chest closed and immediately begin figuring out how to monetize this thing's properties and habits.

It's not smart it's just how it tends to work out.

>> No.50897777

In my opinion the Lok-Nhar can help a bad guy when it serves its nefarious agenda. Like when he helped Captain Stern escape by simulating his demise at the hands of Hannover Fiste.
Or the horde of wastelanders, which he turns into an effective army to destroy the Elders.

>> No.50897783

Store in anus.

>> No.50897816

Isn't that just because the bad guys continue to serve its purpose down the road? Some villains wouldn't like being that thing's tool for the rest of their lives, or even the rest of eternity considering lichhood. Especially if it just means they get discarded to pave the way for a greater evil, like the previous lich.

>> No.50897872

Yes, hence Lok-Nhar destroys the Queen and the Immortal Faggot in the Richard Corben world. You never ever control the Lok-Nhar, you are his bitch and when you don't serve him anymore for his plans you sure will end obliterated.
I mean, this thing is capable of destroy a Flash Gordon tier hero capable of drive a car into a planet's atmosphere from a spaceship and land safely as a level 1 PC will kill a goblin so can make BBEGs like Darkseid or Sauron polish him every morning and kneel on their four before adressing to his spherical evil perfection.

>> No.50897910

Stat the Lok-Nhar, mong.

>> No.50897949

No. The Lok-Nhar is like the Lady of Pain. No stats, except death. Or you're a Taarakian who's willing to fulfill their oath with self sacrifice, then you'll win.

>> No.50898019

Not as a character but as an artifact, brah.
As in the fapping Hand of Vecna.

>> No.50900040
File: 52 KB, 204x204, [praising intensifies].gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Ah, my very own sun! Praise the sun!

>> No.50902385

How do you stat an artifact?

>> No.50903970

Same way you stat a magic item, but with an extra bit about the special process for destroying it.

>> No.50906363

Let's do it then.

>> No.50907006

It vies for control with the Dark Entity contacting my character from within his magical weapon for complete domination of my character. Either way, my character is going to end up becoming a puppet/husk. It's only a matter of question and time who wins out in the end.

From what I can gather so far from the entity within the weapon, it feasts on the souls of those slain by the weapon. It is also very tricksy and deceptive being. Calling it a fiend would be an understatement as it's more of a force of nature.

>> No.50907051

So what is it exactly? Everyone says its a "Loknar," which comes up as a star trek ship when I look it up on google.

>> No.50907070

What would happen if this thing where dropped into the heart of Menzoberranzan?

>> No.50907076


>> No.50907083

Read the fucking thread.

>> No.50907492

In case OP's filename didn't tip you off, it's Loc-Nar not Loknar.

>> No.50907602

Relock the treasure chest and break off a lockpick inside of the lock so it is more difficult to reopen.

Then pray that I wasn't exposed for too long.

(Reminded me of a story where a party finds a glowing rock in a room made out of a cold dark grey metal. It didn't ping as magic or psionic. One member of the party picked it up and the party took it with them. Whenever the DM got them to make fort saves, he quietly gave them CON penalties. Turns out that that rock was radioactive in a bad way.)

>> No.50907613


If anybody wouldn't hesitate to use the Loknar it's the Drow.

>> No.50907619

Nobody can read the fucking filename because of the hat, you fucking dipshit.

>> No.50907644

To be fair, that was my first reaction as well.

God am I going to have to live with this forever.

>> No.50907661
File: 713 KB, 1251x1920, caller1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I will become The Caller.

>> No.50907663

i'm telling you it couldn't make the Drow any worse not that they wouldn't use it, and as soon as Lolth became aware she'd destroy it or be destroyed and that would pretty much signal Loc-Nars end Ao would have an issue with it.
If you had read the fucking thread you'd have noticed you can see the file name when someone link to the OP in their comment thats why you should READ THE FUCKING THREAD!

>> No.50907671
File: 341 KB, 1240x968, caller2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.50907682

Its a % chance. 5% per level.

20th level wizard says math.

>> No.50907700

You a shit.
And your waifu a shit too.


>> No.50907702 [SPOILER] 
File: 265 KB, 1920x1080, 1482906399671.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

g i t _ g u d

>> No.50907715

That's so gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

>> No.50907722

I dislike Lolth too but Ao would totally fucking intervene if some artifact from another universe entirely started killing Gods

>> No.50910078

Did we find his Phylactery?
This could be it... Poke it with a stick, see what happens. And by stick I mean 10 foot pole. And by poke I mean Catapult, from max range.

>> No.50910139 [DELETED] 

It's clearly Marcellus Wallas' soul.

>> No.50910158

It's clearly Marcellus Wallace's soul.

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