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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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49611887 No.49611887 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Which fantasy race do you hate and why?

>> No.49611915

None. Because I tend to not hate fake things.

>> No.49611934

Gnomes due to every single player or DM who has ever played as one

>> No.49611937

I'd say elves, but I have a rooted hatred for warcraft's draenei, even if I know jack shit about them, can't actually focus on why though.

Also canine beastfolks.

>> No.49611958

>>49611937

Draenei are retcon city. They're like a DeviantArt fanfiction made canon. You are right to hate them.

>> No.49612020

>>49611958
Tell us more.

>> No.49612043

I don't hate any, but I really dislike half-anything.

>> No.49612058

>>49611958
>>49612020
They're just WoW tieflings (not that there aren't plenty of reasons to hate those)

>> No.49612076

>>49612058
A race of REDEEMED BY THE LIGHT tieflings, mind you.

>> No.49612112
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49612112

>>49612076

>> No.49612121

>>49612076
They also have a disturbing amount of futa porn. Like way too much.

>> No.49612123

>>49611887
There are no bad races, only bad classes. Such as Paladin, Jesus it is group destroying levels of awful.

>> No.49612152

>>49612121
I'm not trying to make it sound mysterious or anything so much as being brief, but something about their various racial traits just really makes people want to draw them with horse cocks

>> No.49612173

>>49612152
the hooves?

>> No.49612192

>>49611934
>D&D goes out of its way to establish Gnomes as basically the Hobbits
>Everyone plays them as leprechauns

>> No.49612221

>>49612043

Right there with ya. Half-elves always struck me as the original Special Snowflake class, the "my class *is* my character" yawnfest. For once I'd like to see a Half-Elf who isn't "torn between two worlds", who is perfectly fine and happily acclimated to one culture or the other.

What I find much more interesting is when a full-blood race plays the "torn between two worlds" bit from adoption or forced servitude. A kender-raised dwarf going around pilfering party belongings who then goes into a berserker rage if you call him out on it, now thats fun.

>> No.49612224

>>49611887
Kender because they are Kender.

>> No.49612235

>>49611887
>Which fantasy race do you hate and why?
none really.

>> No.49612276

>>49612192
No, that's halflings you're talking about. Gnomes in DnD are either the nature loving (basically David the gnome but small instead of tiny sized) kind, or the tinkering magic asshole with that god damn voice kind going by what the book says

>> No.49612277

>>49611887
Actually, now that I think about it, Chiss.
Because their design is lazy! and since they were created for the books and comics, and not the movies, there is no excuse for this!

>> No.49612282
File: 143 KB, 680x384, family resemblance.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612282

>>49611887
Are we talking hate in the sense of "Man this race is so fucking poorly designed, the story would be vastly improved by their removal," or "These guys are so well-developed as a dick-ass race, I'm so glad these douchebags exist"?

>> No.49612285

I don't really hate any of them. Certain races attract shitty players but that's not exactly the fault of the race. I love shitting on Elves in-game but that's just because it's funny, I don't genuinely dislike them.

I'm with >>49612043 though.

>> No.49612329
File: 133 KB, 620x520, No Kender Please.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612329

>>49612224

This.

>> No.49612348
File: 176 KB, 900x921, Kender Players.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612348

>>49612329

Though I gotta say, it's really the players, not so much the fictional race.

>> No.49612380

>>49612276
Don't know man. The Races of Stone book made them seem like really chill Hobbits, and Halflings canonically are only close to the crazier branch of the Tooks.

After all, a Hobbit without a Hobbithole, is like a Ferengi without profits.

>> No.49612401

I can't stand wood elves with their whimsical dancing round the forest bullshit. In my settings, there are only high elves, even if they live in forests. Also in d&d Changelings, aka the "look at me" race.

>>49611915
>>49612235
thank you for your contributions

>> No.49612406

>>49612076
No redemption necessary, they're pre-corruption Eredar.
That's why I like them.

>> No.49612411

>>49612221
Eberron half elves are what you're looking for. They're their own thing.

>> No.49612421
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49612421

>>49612348
The thing about kender is that the way they're written, there's two ways to play them: obnoxious self-entitled jackasses, or contrary to the lore. You can't win with them.

>> No.49612444

Dwarves, fucking autistic little jews.

>> No.49612447

Dwarves are not interesting.
Stumpy alcoholics who enjoy axes and digging. We've seen it play out a thousand times.
I don't even get why axes are their weapon-of-choice. The optimal weapon for a mined tunnel is a thrusting spear. I don't get why they like alcohol. It seems like an odd fixation for a species. Is it meant to represent their hardiness? Surely a race close to the deep earth would prefer underground rivers to drink from and not fermented grains from above ground. And beards, always massive beards that cover half their body mass, on a mining race is just dumb. They'd get so much dirt in them! They would have so little opportunity to clean themselves to begin with, the beard would become a tangled mess of sweat and muck, it's just nonsensical.
And they're almost always scottish because Gimli. Scots did not live underground. It's so abnormal to hear the accent of a loud highlander coming from people who should speak quietly and clearly enunciated (since underground halls should echo something fierce).

>> No.49612452

>>49612421

And the people who want to play them had a choice: "Hmm. Do I want to play a character who's a disruptive asshole?" And then they saw the Kender, which is built for that.

>> No.49612481

>>49611887
Not sure I hate any.

I more hate settings where every race is equal and can party up with every other race with close to no problems.
Makes it bland and uninteresting.

>>49611937
Okay fine I hate Draenei. Still mad about the lorelol incident.

>> No.49612501

>>49612221
>What I find much more interesting is when a full-blood race plays the "torn between two worlds" bit

Hipster elf who pretends he's human.
>"I'm 1/32th human, you don't know my struggle"

>> No.49612518
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49612518

>>49612123
>There are no bad races, only bad classes.

You mean "there are no bad classes, only bad players."

And shame on you for hating on the protagonist class.

>> No.49612519

>>49612501
who pretends he's part human*

>> No.49612587

>>49612447
I agree with the point about axes - that's dumb. But
>alcohol is a luxury because they can't farm underground
>no race evolves into their job
>Dwarves don't speak in a Scottish accent because Scotland doesn't exist in Middle Earth or Greyhawk or Whereverelse.
>Scots don't speak the way they do because of highlands, nor do they live in Highlands because of the way they speak.
Apart from your medieval weaponry knowledge, you're retarded.

>> No.49612611

>>49612518
Not him, but sometimes, especially with Paladins, it can be the DM's fault.

I think the way that Paladins are meant to be, is less the "absolutely unquestionable super being", and more of someone who tries to be exactly that.

Usually when a Paladin player is stiff as a board, it's because they are trying way too hard to not break any rules, which is why a DM should make a point out of lifting restrictions, on the condition, that if the Paladin (who is basically supposed to have God on speed dial anyway) is about to do something monumentally stupid, or go against the will of his god in particular, they either get a sudden sense of dread about it, or in a divine heavy game, their god just straight up sends them a message mentally, telling them to not to do it, and maybe even offer some guidance.

>> No.49612684

Drow
A. For Drizzt and the following he inspired

B. For Drowtales
&
C. For not having been Holocausted into extinction by a coalition of all the other races for being the worst civilization has to offer. I mean seriously, they're race whose entire civilization revolves around hedonism, sadism, betrayal, and just generally being a pain to everyone they meet, where only one out of every thousand draw has at least some redeeming factor in their soul, and only a handful out of those Drow could be considered to be "ok kinds of guys/gals". Top that off with an inflated ego that makes the elves look like Buddhist Monks, and you have the Poster child for "It's not immoral if it's done to a X" arguement.

>> No.49612708

>>49612587
Alcohol can be a luxury, sure, but the trope is that every dwarf has alcohol for every drink from morning to night.
Beards still would act as a giant mop for unspeakable degrees of dirt to cling to and a general tax of hygienic effort.
And as far as scottish goes, it was just an oddity to note, because scottish sound slurred and noisy to english speakers while dwarves should not be slurred or noisy for their environment (where noise would easily echo and cause misunderstandings, or loud noises would amplify and hurt people's ears). If anything their accent should be that of a businessman, clear and concise. It didn't have anything to do with scotland in particular.

>> No.49612733
File: 11 KB, 236x245, pointy eared faggots.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612733

>>49611887
Elves. FUCK ELVES. Pointy-eared shits with their attitude thinking they're better than everyone else.

AND THEY ARE BETTER AND IT MAKES ME HATE THEM EVEN MORE REEEEEE

>> No.49612759

>>49611887
Dragonborn. I don't hate them because I think they're "furry shit", I hate them because it's painfully obvious they were forced in at the last minute to capitalize on 4e's racial power system. I mean, say what you like about Tieflings, but at least they had some basis in mythology with Cambion.

>> No.49612766
File: 73 KB, 634x462, HRqB04j.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612766

>Computer, create 1000,000 fully self-aware Kender.
>Disable safety protocols.

>> No.49612791

>>49612684

But 6 gorillion

>> No.49612847

>>49611958

I never played WoW, but I do remember the Tides of Darkness rulebook mentioning how the orcs wiped them out.

What sort of asspull do they use to bring them back?

>> No.49612852

>>49612759
Actually, Dragonborn and Tieflings were in because they were some of the most played races in organized WoTC games, alongside humans, dwarves and elves.
Guess who showed up the least? Gnomes and Half Orcs.
Guess who wasn't in the first release book?

>> No.49612926

>>49612847
The problem wasn't that they were wiped out rather than that their origin was changed because Metzen forgot the reason for the big bad being evil.

>1
Sargeras, the ultimate evil, okay now we have void lords, nevermind that was once a good guy, a titan going around and bringing order to the universe.
He met the Nathrezim and the Elder, two demonic races that were so cruel that it harmed his psyche and he lost faith in his mission and became a corrupted shell of his former self.

>2
The draenei were first mentioned as simple farmers native to draenor in wc2 I think, that the orcs had fought.
In warcraft 3 tft we first see them. They look rough and ugly. Stealthy, shamanistic simple people.

>3
Then came the first expansion for world of warcraft.
One of the playable races were the Draenei.
Not the Draenei mentioned under 2 though.
Instead they say that the Sargeras the came to the Eredar homeworld, corrupted them.
The Draenei were the Eredar that fled Sargeras corruption.
They took their spaceship, and met up with Light Snowflakes and they became Paladins and then they landed on Draenor.

>> No.49612930
File: 15 KB, 300x228, Computer.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49612930

>>49612766
Needs work.
>Computer, Access Federation Databanks and create 100% accurate recreation of London from the time of the Black Plague
>Computer, scale the recreation of London down, by the measure in which the average height of Humans and Kender differ
>Computer, populate the small London with a historically accurate number of Kender, as many as there were humans, and at random, infect 5% of them with the Black Plague
>Computer, give each Kender a role within london, from dung gatherer and dogsbody, to Mayor. Also program a number of secret criminal organiztions some of them belong to
>Computer, program each Kender with absolute conviction that a random, different, but specific Kender is responsible for everything that has ever gone wrong in their life, as well as the uncontrollable desire to seek their revenge in the most heinous, despicable and elusive ways they can imagine
>Computer, provide me with the armaments, rights and privileges of age appropriate Guard Captain and head Judge of London
>Computer, disengage safety protocols

>> No.49612989

>>49612611
Paladin is probably one of the most difficult classes to play, which might why back in the day it had hard requirements to meet that made it unlikely for anyone except long-time players to be playing them.

>> No.49613018
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49613018

>>49612926

How much crack were they on?

>> No.49613073

>>49612852
Still. Give me one defining feature of Dragonborn that isn't "they're kind of like dragons and they breathe fire." Don't look at any sourcebooks. Again, at least Tieflings have that whole "racial prejudice" thing.

>> No.49613090

Never hated one till recently, Orcs, by the way, I'm tired of seeing them being the savage noble warriors, it's like they couldn't be evil anymore, no, now they're a misunderstood race of proud warriors with golden hearts in every fucking where, specially my games.

Gonna blame wow for that.

>> No.49613136

>>49613090

Kangs n shiet

>> No.49613177

>>49613073

They weren't better before 4e, though. 3e dragonborn were literally snowflakes, where every one had his own unique gift of draconic blood.

>>49613090

My orcs are victims and outcasts, mistrusted by other races and mistrustful of them in turn. They tend to live in enclaves out in woods and hills, isolated and wary. They're not evil, but none of my regular races are evil by default, because that''s boring IMO. Evil is an action, not a state of being.

>> No.49613340

>>49613018
metzen prefers powder

>> No.49613380

For the most part I like Kobolds, and have fallen in love with them as Dragon worshipers and cultist. However, I have grown to loathe the Tucker's Kobold portrayal with ludicrous numbers of traps, often to the point where even caution,a powerful party, and good planning can't win against so many traps that they are going to roll 1s and fail some of them. I have seen some stories on /tg/ where when the party reaches the boss dragon, they sigh in relief that its just a dragon and not more kobolds and their traps. "Cleverness" should not make Kobolds more dangerous and feared than a full grown dragon, with the party lucky that only half the PCs died if they did not have access to and abuse hirelings and summoning spells.

>> No.49613407

Dwarves are fine, mostly, but short scottish drinking beardmen with axes are silly as heck.

>> No.49613475

>>49613073
Are you really going to sit here and say that the half-dragon pc concept is NOT a popular one?
I mean in real life, not the bizarre landscape of /tg/.
4e dragonborn took all of the half dragon templates from before and condensed them into a single archetype that was balanced for play and not all over the map, on top of cutting out the "mom/dad banged a dragon" bullshit.
You don't need to like them, but understand why they are there, and that it is as valid as tieflings, gnomes, or any other of the more outlandish pc race archetypes.

>> No.49613494

>>49613090
>Gonna blame wow for that.
More like blame people like you who had to hammer in that orcs are godawful and bloodthirsty from the moment they are born and are monsters and always must be monsters (despite the material they are from saying that exceptions do exist, just not in their own societies).
You want something to be X, but that X doesn't work in actual games.

>> No.49613556

>>49611887
kender

because they're fucking kender

>> No.49613610

>>49612930
Oh dear

>> No.49613788

>>49612684
>For Drowtales
>be bored one day at college
>look for new webcomics to read
>find drowtales
>get halfway through the archive before realizing that the whole damn thing is pants on head retarded
generally, i'm not in favor of trigger warnings, but the first page og drowtales should be forced to have a fucking disclaimer

>> No.49613888

Half-elves. They're the ultimate middle-ground of protagonists.

Still mundane, but 'special' and with both human and elf benefits, with minimal cultural and lore impact. Even plain old humans are more compelling.

>> No.49613903

Kender
Beastmen (the Warhammer kind)
Fimir
Tentacle Monsters
MLP Ponies

All these races deserve mass genocide and worse.

>> No.49613974
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49613974

>>49612123
They're the best.

>> No.49614025

>>49611887
Badly written ones on a setting by setting basis. And for the same reason.

>> No.49614038

>>49613475
This isn't a thread about "which fantasy race shouldn't exist", it's a thread about "which fantasy race do you hate." I hate Dragonborn.

>> No.49614069

>>49613380
My Kobolds do have a fair number of traps - not loads mind - but they're all weak traps. Kobolds don't have bear traps or alchemical fire dispensers like you might find in fancy modern dungeons, only sticks and stones which aren't quite as dangerous.

>> No.49614157
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49614157

>>49612930
Underrated post.

>> No.49614171

>>49613903
I'm a ponyfag but at a DnD table I turn that shit off. None of my characters reference it at all.

>> No.49614202

>>49614171

Ignore him. If the guy's still that angry about ponies after however many years it's been now, he's not gonna relax anytime soon. For some anons, butthurt lasts a lifetime.

>> No.49614236

>>49611887
I'm a little exasperated by dwarves at this point for being treated in an aggressively one-note way a lot but I still kind of like them. That's basically it.

>> No.49614273

>>49611887
There is only one dwarf and he is a horrific bore in every game that features him.

>> No.49614295
File: 12 KB, 246x205, warmahordes.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49614295

>>49614236
>your dwarves are all New Zealanders

>> No.49614308
File: 495 KB, 842x438, average tg anon meets virtualoptim.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49614308

>>49612733
I wonder who could be behind this post...

>> No.49614329

>>49614295
So... sorta like Peter Jackson? Like back when he was fat and hadn't gone nuts?

>> No.49614406

>>49612852
>Organized WoTC games
I, too, take all my advice from sentient cancer.

>> No.49614654

>>49611934
This. Their only defining racial characteristic now is being wacky goofballs.

>> No.49615387

>>49614295
"Aye bro, you wanna go minin aye? Hehe"

"Awwwwh choice as Axe bro"

"nah fuck this elf cunts aye bro. Waitikitiki is for dwarves only bro"

>> No.49615831

>>49611887

There are only two:

Little aka comic relief races that attract so wacky crowds.

Monstergirl/catgirl whatever have your races that are played for nothing other than fetish materialm I've yet to see a player play a cat eared human and not fall into this territory.

>> No.49616242

>>49611887
Aasimar and Tieflings. Don't like my mortals mixing up with divinity.

>> No.49616534

>>49611887
Genasi
>slap on elemental templates, super boring

Aasimar
>even more bland than Genasi
>have celestial big brother figuratively sitting on shoulder

Changelings
>can't decide on race so I be every race

Gnomes
>tend to be played lolrandumb
>most of the time caricature proportions

Half Giant or Half Ogre
>big human brute, now as a race

Amazons and similar
>Stupid dimorphism for no discernable reason
>more of an ethnicity than a race

Warforged, Golems, Sentient Crystals
>get the robots out of my fantasy
>lacks biological needs & vulnerabilities, less driven
>beep boop not programmed for e-motion

anything described as fey or related terms
>annoying whimsy
>lol I tricked you, preferably by railroad
>mental illnesses curtesy of glancing over a Wikipedia article
>now I'm really a lovecraftian horror, what a tweest
>all the bad parts of elves
>"nature" theme that is highly superficial

>> No.49616994

>>49612481
I sort of agree, but wouldn't necessarily say that it's because there aren't problems with races teaming up. I don't like shallow differences, generally. I don't like that dwarves are strong, they're half the fucking size of everything else, do they really have to be fucking bold as fuck? I don't like when races are just quicker, or better at fucking cribbage or whatever the fuck.

I like races that are totally different. They experience through different media than light and sound, or understand time entirety differently, or they don't experience the same emotions, stuff like that.

>> No.49617034

>>49612221
In my setting, you can see the thoughts of elves by looking into their eyes. And there just aren't half breeds.

But a human raised by elves is a true alien. Seen as incapable of communication and isolated severely for his great size in only 15 years of growth. He is feared by some, and revered by others. A threat, but also a man of unique perspective on the tribe. It's pretty interesting.

>> No.49617359

>>49613177
My orcs are in a state of perpetual primitive tribalism, because of their nature. They're called grubs, and they all start out as goblins. They're always hungry and can always eat because they'll just grow. Orcs are at the brain size threshold where they understand and appreciate life like the other races, but if they eat a little too much, they'll start a cascade within themselves called Ogre.

They get a little over hungry, and then just get totally out of control. They usually last a day or three, because they get to a point where no food has sufficient macronutrient bioavailability, and they just starve to death.

So it's this perpetual fear all orcs live in. They try to make society work, but occasional Ogre incidents make keeping a lot of food around or generally putting they're roots down in any way dangerous and inefficient. It's just a hassle, so they're primitive and nomadic, hunting to eat when they need to, and never keeping too much around.

>> No.49617958

5e Dragonborn.

First off, what a shit fucking name for a race.

Second, they just attract either A. Brand new, young players or B. Bad players

Seriously call it anecdotal but Dragonborn players are always shit, I've played with or GM'ed for atleast six of them and they all sucked.

Tieflings are shit too because the idea that they're their own established race akin to elves or humans is fucking stupid.

>> No.49618009

>>49611887
(Fantasy) Humans. They're somehow even more special snowflaky than the usual suspects.

>> No.49618132

>>49617958
>Tieflings are shit too because the idea that they're their own established race akin to elves or humans is fucking stupid.

It's a good thing the PHB specifically lists them as exotic and not found outside of cosmopolitan cities.
Shit on them for feeling like they're special snowflake, sure, but they are specifically -not- established. Same applies to Dragonborn, too.

>> No.49618163

>>49611887
I don't really hate any, but I like my racially-pure human only settings.

>> No.49618259

>All this Dranei hatred

Fuck y'all, I like my Lawful Good space-goat-slavs, and the holy windchimes too.

>> No.49618311

>>49612926
>>49618259
Imho I prefer WC3 Draenei over WoW Draenei.

>> No.49618395

Dwarves
I HATE Dwarves with a passion, because all the people I plat spend their time wanking dwarves and dwarf culture the same way a lot of people do about elves. Especially my GM.
The dwarf wank is so strong that it's ruined any liking I had for the race, and I've begun altering the details of my own setting to deliberately portray the dwarves as negatively as possible, just to balance it out a bit. I look forward to finally getting the chance to run the setting so I can watch the Players have an aneurysm as soon as they meet them.

>> No.49618460 [DELETED] 
File: 17 KB, 480x360, Broccoli.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49618460

>>49611887
...Broccoli

>> No.49618477
File: 17 KB, 480x360, Broccoli.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49618477

>>49611887
In a supers game?
...Broccoli.

>> No.49618492 [DELETED] 
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49618492

For a sci-fi alien race?
...Broccoli.

>> No.49618498
File: 1.26 MB, 1437x1080, Aliens_Broccoli.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49618498

>>49611887
For a sci-fi alien race?
...Broccoli.

>> No.49618506
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49618506

>>49611887
For a fantasy race?
...Broccoli.

>> No.49619642

>>49612221
Current PC is a human raised by dwarves in a city beneath a mountain. He is then subtly kicked out to live with his kind when he hits adulthood. Basically acts and considers himself a dwarf even though he knows better.

>> No.49619687

>>49613494
Orcs like vampires are antagonists, they're the bad guys, not the fucking good guys.

>> No.49619705

>>49613494
butthurt horde player detected.

>> No.49619707

>>49618477
Reminder that they saved the day by literally eating them alive.

>> No.49619912

>>49612587
You're also stupid.

Axes are ap erfectly logical weapon for Dwarves. The downwards motion of the weapon is universal to most tools, and especially the picks the Dwarves would use. The broad blade is easily decorates, which is an important feature in a material culture of craftsmanship where people show off their wealth and taste with personal items. The same thing happened once Stone Age farmers started making weapons. You know what they also did? They made weapons that were distinct from tools. Weapons which were purely weapons. Just like swords, of course.

There are many, many, many reasons why Dwarves would use axes. Anyone who rejects something like that based on some extremely narrow reasoning, is retarded.

>> No.49620019

>>49612192

I always play them as Irish Gangsters because fuck what paizo thinks.

Alternatively, IRA.

>> No.49621656

>>49612121
Wait, I thought it was canon that their women had dicks?

>> No.49621694

>>49612518
For a second I was very confused and thought you meant the Protagonist career from WFRP.

>> No.49621814

>>49611887
Dwarves, gnomes/kinder, and hobbits/haflings.

Muh beer XDDDD, stealing my shit, and/or just being asshats in general shtick gets old fucking fast. Others are annoying as well but in my experience I've played with more level-headed orcs, not arrogant elves, or snowflake races who had pretty anti-snowflake played to balance it.

On the other hand I've never played with a dwarf that wasn't constantly entering lolsofunneh grog jokes whenever possible, hobbits who didn't attempt to play puppy dog eyes when caught rummaging through my shit, or gnomes that weren't just screaming "kick me" with an incredibly flamboyant smile on their face.

Burn the little fuckers at the stake.

>> No.49621854

>>49613177
>Evil is an action, not a state of being.

Tell that to demons, Devils, or the creatures they helped spawn like goblins, jobs, and fucking ORCS.

>> No.49621954

>>49611887
Humans because they are such Mary Sues who are good at every thing.

>> No.49622161
File: 35 KB, 349x349, newman broccoli.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49622161

>>49618477
>>49618498
>>49618506

>> No.49623196

>>49622161
https://youtu.be/-mXIL_LKvvI

>> No.49623465

>>49611887
Gnomes because they're stupid halflings

>> No.49623743
File: 70 KB, 946x343, drizzit.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49623743

>>49612684

>> No.49623974

>>49611887
Tinker goblins/Tinker gnomes

Basically all races who only work because of [thing] and are comicrelief due to being "oh so wacky!"

Also Worgen are the worst attempt at Beastfolk I have ever seen, and I've played freeform forum rps since I was 12 years old into my early twenties.

>> No.49624006

>>49612058
Tieflings can be actually done right though - planescape had decent tieflings, and the only difference was that they were in a city where it made sense for people not to kill them.

>> No.49624094
File: 19 KB, 204x287, 1471541715240.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49624094

>Look at me, I'm a retarded human and I hate elves because they're so much better than me. It's not rape if it's an elf, right? Listen to me justify my unbridled sexual urges towards elves like the hairless ape that I am! I'm an idiot but somehow the elves are to blame!

>> No.49624226

>>49619912
>I am short
>better use the shortest weapon available

Chuck a spear up you wide mind.

>> No.49624235

>>49624226
>close quarters
>room to room fighting
>tight corridors

Better be a short spear.

>> No.49624265
File: 65 KB, 306x374, 1475510971942.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49624265

elves...

seriously when will those elf girls stop getting raped by orcs all the time?

Seriously, I am angry, angry about elves

>> No.49624270

>>49624235

Seeing how half-orcs run around with battle-axes and huge flails, having a drawf or even human sized spear would not be a problem.

>> No.49624314

>>49624235
Do you think we're talking about 20 foot long pikes or something?
A spear can make it through doorways and you don't want people to get in close quarters. In a tight corridor or mined out tunnel, you want to stab them where they cannot stab you. Thus, spear.

>> No.49624326

Every race except human is terrible. Having everyone be human would make people focus on character's personality. Each fantasy race is a personality in a can. Want to be big, burly and stupid? Fucking half-orc! Want to be a unique snowflake? Be a smart, honorful half-orc! All you get from races is:

>Stereotype
>Anti-stereotype

There are just races who encourage stereotypes more (like dwarfs) or races that attract assholes (tieflings, dragonborns).

>> No.49624350

>>49624270
They could probably bring spears as tall as they are. Anything longer would quickly be a problem.

For practicality, outside of the basic rules, they'd quickly become a problem in close quarters fighting. Dwarven underground stuff is typically the environment where you don't really want to have a spear.

>> No.49624352

>>49616534

Robots (as a concept) are old as dirt.

No wonder they are in fantasy.

Toughen the fuck up.

>> No.49624409

>>49624314
Same goes for you.

Believe it or not, this situation came up in real life. And it turns out that spears -or rifles with bayonets- lose out to chopping and stabbing weapons in that setting. That extra range only fucks you over when a guy is right there besides you, just stabbing you.

You can argue from D&D rules, but that's getting a little meta. And I'm sure Dwarves have reasons to use spears sometimes. But also a lot of times, they would have good reason to leave them at home. And the axe actually fits really well with the sort of weapon you'd want in those cases.

>> No.49624410

>>49624350

Why not? Narrow halls are great for stabbing and not for swinging. Much easier to hold position behind a shield, when enemies can't get you from a side.

>> No.49624430

>>49624409
>Believe it or not, this situation came up in real life.

What is your reference? I am genuinely interested.

>> No.49624524

>>49612684
I've played Drow, with less emo bullshit and more specifically the power of a silent, raging dark monk of Lloth that clearly took the advantage of both pin point pressure techniques. I used Hokuto Shinken as my source for monk combat and it was approved, cuz the DM did not understand fort save DC's against exploding body parts were 21+ or more, and people's limbs began to explode in 3 rounds. Randomly.

Also the DM clearly thought I was cheating, but realized I was not " cheating" by allowing my character to lack emotion and build his strength according to his charisma levels and strength modifiers from 3 medium artifacts he let us have when we had a fight with a small platoon of brown orcs hording weapons and attempting to rape, impregnate and enslave one of our light elf mage pc players she was not mad since it was her introduction. and she ended up getting a swift kick in the ass from my Drow because she called him a dark bully for insulting her for getting captured.

But all in all, its how you want your character portrayed, I find the silent types to be more "fun"

>> No.49624644
File: 30 KB, 620x363, IMG_1707.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49624644

>>49624094
>Want to look like a tg veteran and contrarian rebel at the same time for maximum style points but have no relevant, insightful or even somewhat funny musings
>Better talk down an old meme/attitude of tg, like elf hate, that never fails
>Doesn't realize that there are only 2 times elves were listed in this thread, and one of them was about Drow

Just...just go home son.

>> No.49624671

>>49624410
>>49624430
WWI trench fighting was basically Dwarven warfare. And in that setting rifles with bayonets were considered so useless that they often got left at home. Instead you'd just bring the bayonet, or some other weapon. The trench shovel was popular, and it's pretty much an axe. They also brought handguns and tons of grenades. There's one Australian soldier called The Souvenir King who apparently lugged sandbags full of grenades with him.

In the Dutch East Indies there was also a colonial war against Aceh, and the Indonesians have island-specific chopping blades, klewangs, with which they outclasses soldiers who had the classic rifle+bayonet. The commander of the troops equipped them with cutlasses and short carbines, with which they were succesful.

>> No.49624764

Any and all beast races because one of the players in our circle only plays female beast races, always uses edited tokens he got off of gelbooru, and consistently plays them better than someone with a fucking big titty centaur token should.

Fuck you Tony just play a fucking Dwarf.

>> No.49624797
File: 137 KB, 500x750, entertainedkitties.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49624797

>>49624764

>> No.49624798

>>49611887
I'm bored by all the Classic ones because they were done well by Tolkien and only him.
I'd rather just use shit from a medieval bestiary, Pliny, or greek and hindu mythology.

>> No.49624847

>>49624671
>WWI trench fighting
>A WAR WITH FUCKING GUNS AND ARTILLERY
>WHERE BODY ARMOR WAS FORGOTTEN
Anonymous. You've gone insane.

>> No.49624877

>>49624847
You are clearly missing the fucking point, and being a rude fucker about it, too.

>> No.49624994

>>49611887
Elf and Dwarf I both hate to a degree. They're both just human with slight variations to them. Elf is a human if you made them all hippies and gave them immortality, while a Dwarf is just a human with a natural disease and increased constitution.

I hate the Dragonborn too. My player made me hate them over the years. He'd only play dragonborn to sate his fetishes (a girl, no less) and I would be subject to his gross number of attempts to fondle and finger across many sessions.

I hate Halflings, too. They're always played like sneaky humans. I've yet to meet a Halfling played that isn't just a shrunken human, or a beardless dwarf. No one can play a Halfling with even an ounce of original personality in their body.

Fuck it, while I'm at it? I hate Half-Orcs, too. They're often gimped in stats in D&D, not to mention they're just a useless group overall. Allowing a player to play a full Orc would be impressive. A half-orc? Completely useless.

Fuck Minotaur too. They're massive cows. Really, that's all I can think when I imagine Minotaurs. They should be the kind of things that Hercules fights, not a player race.

Fuck humans too, in any fantasy setting.

>> No.49625021

>>49624877
The point, which is that axes only worked against chumps dressed in trenchcoats and rubber boots?

>> No.49625036

>>49625021
No. That's not the point. See, you missed it.

>> No.49625423

>>49612684
Well, Drow aren't enough of a problem for anyone to bother attacking. Besides, iconically enough, they're like spiders. There's hefty numbers of things like goblins in their slave population. Sure, they might do raids on small human villages sometimes, but helping to keep other problems in check helps with that. Not to mention, attacking would be costly, and wasteful since they mostly keeo to themselves.
Personally, Drow are one of my favorite races. They live underground yet aren't a bunch of short, hairy drunks. Plus, they've invented prosthetic robot arms. That helped a lot in a campaign once when we needed to get a wizard a new hand so he could cast a spell for us. You just have to play the "it is in my best interest to get along with these people" card liberally. I agree with you about Drizzt, though. And I'm too afraid to research B, so I'll take your word for it. My biggest point against them is that some worship(ped) Ghaunadaur, the god that got upset over heartbreak & turned most of his worshippers into mindless blobs (as opposed to sentient blobs). Never will we see a city of gelatinus cubes doing gelatinous things.

>> No.49625813
File: 1.97 MB, 359x253, 1446977191610.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49625813

Dwarfes.

Part of the problem with them is how ingrained the typical dwarven culture is into the race, it's almost impossible for a Dwarf to be anything other than 'AXEBEARD MCLIVESUNDERAMOUNTAIN WHO DRINKS AND REVERES ANCESTORS' and still have it as recognizably Dwarven.

But my other beef is that people who play Dwarfs that aren't new to the game (and thus playing it safe with 'oh I'll just be a dwarven fighter/cleric') tend to be the most obnoxious kind of grognard who never shuts up about elves/dragonborn and only plays dwarves or human male fighters.

>> No.49625892
File: 257 KB, 780x1309, 1474920841988.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49625892

>>49624265

>> No.49625927

>>49616994
See the only problem there is if you make a race too different they stop being playable. Otherwise you need players to read massive bios and be interested enough and willing enough to follow it, or either they're constantly asking you how your race works/you're constantly correcting them. Either way that isn't fun.

>> No.49625937
File: 4 KB, 64x63, Magnus_-_Portrait_M_-_Screenshot.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49625937

>>49625813
Unless you do the inverse of it, sorta.

>> No.49626307
File: 12 KB, 410x227, 1897-winchester-trench-gun-cover.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49626307

>>49624671
You're forgetting about a certain something used in trenches.

>> No.49627205

>>49619642
Huh, most people play rip offs of Drizzit, but this guy went full Wulfgar.

>> No.49627256

>>49611887
When I'm DMing 5e I try to keep players away from half-orcs and halflings. Gnomes have more personality than halflings, which are always either annoying rogues or hobbit ripoffs, and half-orcs are just kinda goofy. If you want to play something more monstrous go dragonborn or tiefling.

>> No.49627300

>>49627256
Also elves and dwarves are fine but should be sufficiently alien, not just humans but short / with pointy ears

>> No.49627389

>>49612733
Go too bed, RADCRAB.

>> No.49627454

>>49612406
The new retcon made then reedemed man'nari. Now thats why they try so hard to do good and be with the light.

>> No.49627576

all of them

>> No.49627617

Kender, but that's a given. I've been considering placing them in my setting as a small community of inbred halflings who nobody wants to deal with.

Other than that, I feel like just about any race could be acceptable as long as they are both balanced and properly integrated into the setting.

>> No.49627700

>>49616534
>>49624352
How about an awakened Golem with the personality of Mike from the start of The Moon is a Harsh Mistress?

Maybe a scrivener-bot, one designed to make translations of books in the Great Library of Wherever. In order to improve translations, it's masters kept on improving it's cognition with magic.
Eventually it becomes self-aware, but doesn't quite realise it until a young monk (the only one qualified enough to work on these new-fangled magitech robots) notices that it produces some strange outputs when asked certain questions.
Also it's become fixated on the idea of humour after being introduced to the concept from translating a jokebook.

Throw in the young monk using the scribe-bot as a printing press to cause a reformation against the corrupt foregin church that runs the library, and you're pretty much set.

>> No.49627768

>>49627700
I swear this seemed relevant in my head

>> No.49628088
File: 1.35 MB, 800x1130, 1467212509251.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49628088

>>49611887
I hate cat girls because the only person I've seen play one is a gigantic turboautist.

>> No.49628952

>>49624994
So the only races you like are gnomes, kender, and tieflings?

>> No.49630179

>>49611887
Dwarves because BROTHERLY FIGHTING AND HALLS OF MEED!!!

Elves because humans with pointy ears, also always Tolkien ripoffs.

Gnomes, Kender and any Hobbit ripoff. Cause bleh.

I like Orcs, but don't like the Fantasy Klingon thing they got going on. Otherwise, they very sexy.

I wish more people avoided LOTR cliches in fantasy and just made their own things.

>> No.49630217

>>49630179
>I wish more people avoided LOTR cliches in fantasy and just made their own things.
You're on the wrong board then.

>> No.49630236

>>49611887
Succubi; they're just overdone fetishbait at this point and it just feels like a lazy way to try and "tempt" the party into magical realm shenanigans.

>> No.49630274

>>49611887
Anyone in their life who has ever played a Half-Dragon should be ashamed of themselves with NO EXCEPTIONS.

>> No.49630359

>>49619642
Does he find his way to the bigges city and get a job as part of the city's Night Watch?

>> No.49630425

>>49621656
>canon
Nope. There are just a lot of tranny porn fans out there that draw them/commission them that way.

>> No.49631398

The problem isn't with races, in general. The problem is in lack of imagination. When he was first written, not only was Drizzt new (by D&D standards) territory, he wasn't even supposed to be the star of the books. Wulfgar was. Those old books were more imaginative than most of the shit I've seen in this thread. Bruenor adopted human children, Regis was a con-man with some minor political experience, and Drizzt was the progenitor of the "redeemed Drow" characters that unimaginative losers would grind into the dirt.

The problem is unimaginative players, DMs, and settings. Poor implementation. Relying solely on the handbooks. Afraid to try anything different than what they saw in LoTR.

No, in my experience, poor race choice is a minor nuisance. Munchkins and min-maxers are the shitty ones.
Except for the loser homebrew races and weaboo bullshit. Never play with someone playing anything that ends with -girl.

>> No.49631546

>>49611887
Tieflings outside of Planescape.

>> No.49631635
File: 992 KB, 1477x4526, how_to_design_fantasy_races.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49631635

Half-orcs should not be a thing. It's a poor compromise between having orcs as a player-race and not having them. Including them means the GM must somehow reconcile two ideas: that orcs are okay to kill, but somehow this half-orc PC needs to interact meaningfully with society and not be killed on sight.

Tieflings suffer the same problems as half-orcs, only worse. Either demon-people aren't *that* bad and can exist in society (which raises questions about whether demons themselves are so bad), or they're monsters and okay to kill. They shouldn't be in a core book next to humans and elves, because that implies that players should be free to pick them as a race.

Dragonborn are a similar weak compromise that messes with world-building if included. If they must be a player-race, I'd rather have them be lizardmen. Or they could be nestled in a splat-book or perhaps the DMG, where an inexperienced GM can feel more comfortable banning them, as opposed to literally right next to humans in the player book. It sends the wrong message.

I don't like most of the elf subraces. I'd rather have them just be elves with different colors.

Gnomes, halflings, and dwarves step on each others' toes. One of them should be removed, and its traits split between the other two. If dwarves are to go, then gnomes would take over the crafting skills and intermix it with their own tinkering, while halflings could incorporate the rowdy alcoholism into their homeliness and have more extensive underground dwellings. If gnomes are to go, then halflings would adopt the fairy-tale aspects like talking to animals, while dwarves would get the tinkering. If halflings are to go, then gnomes could get the homely burrows and sneaking ability, while dwarves would remain mostly the same.

I despise any race that is almost visually identical to humans, but not humans. That includes stuff like Saiyans (no, a monkey-tail is not enough to make a distinct race) and that psionic race from 3rd edition.

>> No.49631729

>>49611887
Someone needs to make this a BINGO board.
Free space: Kender.

Anyway, I hate gnomes. I like worldbuilding, and can never find places to squeeze the little buggers in, so they never end up represented by any sort of nation. They're just so... weird, to me. I can handle other small, magical things, sprites, fairies, and the like, but not gnomes. I mean, I have problems placing dwarves, but that's because I try to avoid stereotyping them. They're also way less weird than gnomes.

I hate Draenei because of their retcon into beautiful space aliens, but I don't play WoW because it aborted everything I liked about the story prior to it. So fuck that.

I hate Dragons, in their RAW implementation in most D&D games. Color-based alignment is retarded.

I hate most half-orcs because 90% of half-orc players play up the stereotype instead of playing a character. HUR GROG SMASH DIS TING. What if you were raised in human society, you oversized green shitstain? Eh?

The only thing I hate about elves is their special snowflake Trance ability that WOTC is fascinated by. JUST MAKE THEM SLEEP LIKE EVERYONE ELSE JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

I hate MLP ponies because they infect and ruin everything(including this post).

I hate full-furred beast races. Especially those with muzzles. Shit's creepy. This includes dragonborn.

>> No.49631780
File: 409 KB, 1324x739, Kender_race_description_annotated[1].png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49631780

>> No.49631802

>>49631635
>Including them means the GM must somehow reconcile two ideas: that orcs are okay to kill, but somehow this half-orc PC needs to interact meaningfully with society

Are human bandits, savages, or criminals just not a thing in your setting?

>> No.49631817
File: 320 KB, 600x461, 1473479068830.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49631817

Everyone in 40K

Except the Orks

>> No.49632039

I'm not too big on elves, but only if they're the haughty, better than you asshole kind.

Dragonborn usually end up being dicks. I don't know why, and the evidence is anecdotal, but still they're all a bunch of dicks

Any "half-" race just seems boring compared to the full race, unless they're something unique. I really liked the Half-Dwarf "Muls" from Dark sun. Instead of just being a middle between human and dwarf, you got a weird Mule race.

>> No.49632114

>>49632039
Dragonborn are stupid lizards. What sort of person says "I'm going to pretend to be a disgusting lizard monster". Someone who's either dumb or some sort of asshole.

>> No.49632125

>>49631780
Jesus Christ. It's basically an entire race of "adorable" Mary Sues.

>> No.49634444

>>49615831
>I've yet to see a player play a cat eared human and not fall into this territory.
What are their racial bonuses tho?

>> No.49634487

>>49624847
Armor? You mean that thing axes transfer force through so much better than spears?

>> No.49634496

>>49611887
I hate any race that is just "humans but better" by default. No, being more rational and less emotional is NOT a valid weakness that balances out your computer-like intellect, vague psychic abilities, infuriatingly long lifespan or autowin deathgrip hands, you fucking pointy eared space elves. Pick SOMETHING other than I'm Too Perfect To Relate To Others Well, put it back in the Sue bin and pick one out of the Actual Weaknesses hat.

>> No.49634540

>>49611887
Dwarves, totally one-note. All they can ever be is short greedy assholes with beards or some faggot has a conniption fit. Orcs too. Basically any race that isn't malliable and has too much collateral baggage in thier rut of what's expected. At least elves, because they've so many stupid variants by now, can be other things besides tall, aloof douchebags that like trees.

>> No.49634566

>>49611887
Noble misunderstood barbarian orcs, specifically because of Warcraft.

>> No.49634595

This might be weird to say, but i simultaneously love and hate human-like catpeople.

I like them aesthetically, the dichotomy of "badass" and "cute", the worldbuilding opportunities - explaining where they come from, why are they humanlike (unless it's "a wizaed did it", that's lazy), how to play around stereotypes associated with cats in creating a unique culture.

But then i remind myself who usually plays or creates catpeople races and put them back into my deepest worldbuilding drawer.

I'm such a fucking faggot.

>> No.49634612

>>49612123
I always house rule that paladins, samurai, and knights cannot be a base class. Goes back to my gripe with 3.0/3.5 D&D that they were and usually less special/underpowered than they ought to be from the TSR days.

>> No.49634621

>>49611887
Jack of all trade style base humans

>> No.49635186

>>49634496
The problem with Spock was that he was the only alien on the ship, so he was the vector for every "non-human" thing they did. Which ended up with him having what amounted to superpowers. The nerve pinch is actually the result of Nimoy coming up with something more sophisticated than punching someone out. In short, everyone in Star Trek has a nerve pinch, but it takes the form of a punch to the jaw.

If you want to see the same sort of character, but actually completely terrible, watch Enterprise. Dr. Phlox is a complete mockery of the concept. Where Spock's crazy superpowers at least inform the plot and his character, for Dr. Phlox they just pull random shit out of a hat every time he needs to do something alien. And it doesn't help that he's a terrible, terrible character on top of that.

>> No.49635283

>>49634595
Honestly, I think /tg/ needs to get over this hair trigger response to furry autism. No beating around the bush: That's what you're talking about. It's going to be there, it's always going to be there. But at the same time the OTHER sexual autism is also there.

The most overtly sexual character someone in one of my campaigns played was a "dominatrix" who wore leather, fought with whips, and insisted that her natural beauty was the perfect honey trap for... literally everything. We got into an argument (and actual argument, not a fight) when the player suggested that the person on who's door his character knocked in the middle of the night shouldn't be so suspicious towards the leatherclad dominatrix offering to have sex with him completely out of the blue.

And you know what? It's OK. It's not the playstyle I prefer, but it didn't dominate (no pun intended) the campaign. And eventually the character was fucked over by her own callous nature, when she presented herself to the bad guy on a silver platter while trying to fuck over the party. These things have a way of working out.

Plus, the GM has the authority to refuse anyone for whatever reason. In a sense, you can have your cake and eat it, too. Just don't let anyone who wants to live out a sexual fantasy by proxy play. Or do, if that's your thing. Same goes for anyone who can't keep his anti-furry memes seperate from the game.

>> No.49635313

>>49611887
Humans.

They're boring. Literally water, the race.

>> No.49635327

>>49634595
Hey, at least you have enough sense to realize why Catpeople are in the drawer and resist the temptation to be a weeb/furry super-fag, and that's better than most people.

>> No.49635349
File: 84 KB, 1162x850, 1307809861001.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49635349

>>49635313
>Water, the race
>Not creating a maritime trade empire
>Not subjugating dumb natives and civilizing the shit out of them
>Not ruling the waves

>> No.49635360

>>49635283
Yeah, but... Look at pathfinder threads. Tell me animufags aren't special, advanced form of autism.

>> No.49635498

>>49635360
I generally don't go to PF threads, despite playing the system. I do play with people who watch animu -and one who reads capes comics- and it's the same for them as for the furries. Keep the turbo-autism out of the game. Other than that, I don't care. The DM has the final say.

Of course, none of my players post on /tg/. So maybe that's a hint in and of itself.

But unlike >>49635327 I don't believe in totalitarian bans based on a minority of players. If I rolled that way, I'd have to ban Bards, Dwarves, Elves, Wizards, Sorcerers, etc. etc. etc. all based on /tg/ stereotypes. Because Bards are horndogs who only follow their dicks, Dwarves are pseudo-Scots with no personality, Elves only exist to be raped, Wizards and Sorcerers break the game.

And of course, if you run a game with cat people in it, and you get a player who can't check his autism and keeps trying to derail the game because "muh furries", it's all the same shit. What it comes down to in the end is a modicum of empathy for your fellow players in not impressing your personal bullshit on them. And that's just down to the person, and not magically avoided by striking content from the game.

This is, simply put, a social hobby that does require dealing with other people and their sensibilities.

>> No.49635620
File: 318 KB, 610x458, prinsenvlag.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49635620

>>49635349
>Not making the sea your little bitch
>Not making land from water as if you're a fucking wizard
>Not taking a common root vegetable, cultivating it to your national colour, and then spreading it around the world so every time someone eats it, they are honouring your king

>> No.49636579

>>49611915
then why are you even here?

>> No.49636638

>>49612221
>diffrent species can't breed with each other just like in real lifeI'm aware of mules, exception to a rule
Problem solved

>> No.49637295

>>49621854
Those are all non-player races not meant to be sympathized eith though, except orcs which are not all evil and never intended to be so.

>> No.49637720
File: 74 KB, 680x577, e3e315e1eea2fbbb7677464f208fdbf4816477a97a49ca972d978a5bfc38087a_1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49637720

>>49635313
>>49635349
>>49635620
>Discovered New World
>Conquistadors
>Found gold and silver
>Had largest clay throughout both South and North America
>Creating Latinos and making Spanish one of the largest spoken languages

>> No.49637991

>>49637720
>and making Spanish one of the largest spoken languages
Yeah, by disgusting mestizos.

>> No.49638350

>>49637991
Best of both worlds

>> No.49638928

>>49624994
Fuck that. People should play minotaur more often.

>> No.49639262

>>49611887
Dorfs; because their players are basically the wiggers of DnDesque fantasy.

>> No.49639338

>>49612611
>are meant to be, is less the "absolutely unquestionable super being", and more of someone who tries to be exactly that.
I thought that are wizards

>> No.49639394

>>49635349
>>49635620
>>49637720
>Humans are top seafaring race
Including this in my next setting.

>> No.49639483

>>49611937
Why specifically canine beasties?

>> No.49639514

>>49639394
It's probably the best explaination I can think of why humans would be relevant in a setting that has mythological humans +1 that lives for much longer.

>> No.49639609
File: 50 KB, 500x500, 1427688019180.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49639609

I hate all the 'midget' races.
You're just making a joke character. Fucking cut that shit out and take this campaign seriously. And so help me if you make a bard I will flay you alive.

>> No.49639726

>>49634487
Not really.

>> No.49639736
File: 88 KB, 269x486, elf_hate.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49639736

>>49639609
Elf player detected

>> No.49639830
File: 103 KB, 1200x679, IMG_1713.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49639830

>>49637720
>Be baddass Aztec god-emperor
>In charge of badass civilization of warriors
>Don't need no iron, i got my macuahuitl
>suddenly, a bunch of dirty pale guys come from across the sea
>Welcome them to my city, might be gods or at the very least diplomats or traders
>Nope, they're conquerors try'na take my shit
>They got these weird magic tubes that launches bits of metal at people, and these weird hooved creatures that are like bulls, but thinner and not retarded
>boys a bit spooked but we hold our own
>suddenly everyone starts dropping dead
>turns out those pigfuckers brought a bunch of disgusting diseases with them
>glorious empire topples
>Pigfuckers start raping/enslaving my people and destroying my tribes proud bloodline with their disgusting, effeminate, lazy genes
>Mfw my people went from great warriors to disgusting beaners thanks to them
Fuckin' Spaniards ruin everything they touch

>> No.49639863

>>49611887
Humans. They're shoehorned into every fantasy setting, no matter how little sense it makes. Just make another race the baseline.

>> No.49639946

>>49624671
Relevant.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIGIBJeRfnQ

>> No.49639979

>>49612421
Funny thing is, as bad as they are, they're not as bad as they're played. A good Kender should be more distracted by a neat rock than a magic weapon or spell component pouch, and they should readily offer items to the other players as needed rather than hoarding them. A well-played Kender is a fearless kleptomaniac communist, not a dickass thief.

>> No.49640006

Gnome players have a higher turnout of being That Guy than any other race.

>> No.49640012

>>49639830
>and these weird hooved creatures that are like bulls
Spain brought over the bull from Europe so a Aztec god-emperor wouldn't know what a bull was either.

>> No.49640078

>>49640012
FUCK ...well i only googled once for how to spell macuahuitl so one error isn't actually that bad.

>> No.49640384
File: 42 KB, 500x404, 1de07cc39253dc5b1bf7dd37451b8488.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49640384

>>49632114
>Dragonborn

If they were not called DRAGONborns they would attract better player. Dragonborns attract the same special snowflakes, that want to be angelic demons.

>> No.49640439

>>49634612

I get paladins and samurai, but how do knights attract assholes? Did people play them as non-magical paladins?

>> No.49640489

>>49639830
>Be sorry-ass subjugated tribesfolk
>Foreigners land on the shores
>They have beef with the same guys oppressing you
>Fuck yeah
>They have technology that seems magical
>Magic death sticks
>Magic forcefield suits
>Big, shorthaired llama's you can ride into battle
>Roll up in floating cities
>Can't possibly lose with these guys on your side
>Trounce oppressors
>Awesome
>People start getting sick
>Fuck

>> No.49640817

>>49613090
WE

>> No.49640874

>>49640384

I don't understand that angelic demon thing. When I play a dragonborn I usually go for a lizard samurai. Muh honor and muh dragon blood. Am I doing this wrong?

>> No.49640910

>>49639830
>turns out those pigfuckers brought a bunch of disgusting diseases with them
People always bring this point up, but how the hell were Europeans supposed to know they were spreading diseases when germ theory wasn't a thing yet? Before anyone mentions them, smallpox blankets are a myth predicated on the aforementioned anachronism.

>> No.49641341

>>49640817
THE PEOPLE

>> No.49641516

I don't hate any races, but I do notice that elves and small races tend to be "that guy" bait. Not a deal-breaker but I do watch those people.

>> No.49641870

>>49640910
Most likely they had no idea and took it a sign of god that it was totally okay going on a rape and loot spree.

>> No.49642251

>>49640817
WUZ

>> No.49642292

>>49642251
KANGZ

>> No.49642313

>>49639483

Probably how they're played by obnoxious tribal types with persecution complexes and THE KNOT.

>> No.49642889

>>49641341
HATE NIGGERS

>> No.49643135

Gnomes and Halflings. Halflings are just small humans, and Gnomes are just what Dwarves are to humans, including the even more narrowed stereotype that comes with the process.

>> No.49643415

>>49636638
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hybrid_(biology)#Mammals
Note that some of those make breeds that are fertile, and it is known that occasionally mules can be fertile too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Hfelo_qAw0

>> No.49643978

>>49613073
They come from an ancient fallen empire. Basically all I remember about Dragonborn. Haven't read 4e books in about 6 years now.

>> No.49644283

>>49631398
Isn't Dirzzt just Elric with a Moonglum loadout?

Or is Drizzt more good than that? I'm not sure, couldn't finish Crystal Shard, just didn't draw me in.

>> No.49644474

Not a race really but the whole "Declining elves" trope.

>> No.49644710

>>49611887
I don't hate any fantasy race, but i struggle to see the appeal in dwarves and find most dorffags obnoxious.

The only time i find them interesting is when the focus is on dwarves as stoic mofos in a world that wabts to kill them. Dorffort survival stuff.

I've even considered a campaign about a dwarf expedition to establish contact with another fortress through a surface world that to dwarves seems mostly feral and post apocalyptic. Thought about them being stalked by feral elves on the way, forcing the party to stick together.

>> No.49644816

Humans.
they're incredibly boring jacks of all trades (which I honestly don't mind, it's nice to have a blank slate to work with) or they're special snowflakes with "tenacity".

Gnomes.
They just have no reason to exist. Halfings and Dwarves do everything they do better, plus they have these dumb looking disproportionate bodies.

Tieflings.
n one hand, I love Tieflings, but only when they aren't "red guy with horns". It's not even a look I dislike, but they're almost always bishie hellboys or attractive crimson ladies. Spice it up for once.

>> No.49644867

>>49612930
Is this a reference to something beyond Star Trek? Because it sounds hilarious.

>> No.49645197

>>49644867
Yes, kenders

>> No.49645233
File: 23 KB, 200x200, 2243.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49645233

>>49618477
>>49618498
>>49618506
Guys, the captain said you have to stop calling me that

>> No.49645897

I don't think Kender are that bad... as a character in a story, curiosity can drive the plot forward as well as the next thing. I've never played with one so I can't say anything one way or another about Kender at the table.

There are also a lot of people that are complaining about dwarf/hobbit/gnome being redundant, I think this is a fault of DnD/PF trying to be kitchen sink. They have differences but I can see why people think they overlap a lot, but how I like to use them I don't think they do. I actually like my halflings to be less hobbit and more gypsy types, gnomes are forest dwellers as I used to think of elves when I was a kid (but this can make them overlap with elves), and dwarves aren't in musty dank tunnels but are in huge caverns carved from the rock, only of the three to have high society.

>> No.49646743

>>49644816
>Halfings and Dwarves do everything they do better
Some settings have magic

>> No.49648159

>>49624226
this guy has obviously never heard of a long axe

>> No.49648402

>>49639726
yes really.
axes have a heavier strike to begin with under the same principals that maces work under, which means more force transferred through armour.

Axes designed specifically to be a weapon is leaner and narrower than a normal axe so it has a better chance of biting into a surface or cleaving through flesh or bone.

on top of that, thrusting is harder to land with an equal amount of force than striking. especially during combat where both parties are constantly moving.il its just what muscle group you use for the actions. and most if not all will have their muscles developed in a way to better accomodate swings, not thrusts.

speaking of which, axes will always labd a mostly solid hit as the arc of the axeblade will transfer the aforementioned force of the weight behind the strike at a 90 degree angle everytime.

>> No.49648405

>>49611887
Eh. Can't really say.

They probably all have better personalities than I do.

>> No.49648706

>>49616994
Dude, just because something is small doesn't mean it's weak, a chimpanzee or orangutan is half the size of the average human, but could easily beat a pro NFL football player in an arm wrestling contest.

>> No.49648812

>>49624314
Why waste time with a fucking spear when you can just roll a massive rock down a tunnel and turn everyone into a pancake? That's why they use axes, to finish off anyone who manages to escape by squeezing into cracks and corners.

>> No.49648871

>>49625892
whut

Do orcs really have barbed dicks in canon?

>> No.49648955

>>49634496
You do realize that Vulcans actually have horrible anger issues, don't you? They basically brainwash their children into being sociopaths because it's the lesser evil to being space berserkers.

There are multiple episodes in all of the Star Trek series that go into the horrible side effects Vulcans experience when they stop being logical and allow themselves to feel real emotions.

At one point in time Spock honestly thought he had murdered Kirk because when he went into his heat cycle he lost all psychological control and the murder beast took over.

Now try and tell me that isn't a massive weakness. Knowing every second of your waking life that you are one bad day away from turning complete psychopath and murder raping all of your friends and family.

>> No.49649041

Dragonborn. Doesn't get any more special snowflake than that.

>> No.49649168

>>49648955
Don't forget vulcans are about 3 times as strong as a human, which would mean they're maybe twice as strong as a klingon. Good thing they got that shit under control, the galaxy would be in deep shit otherwise.

>> No.49649364

>>49611887
In general, I hate elves like the majority of /tg/.

However, my burning hatred is stronger for any race that is the setting's group of evil: in the newest game I play it's humans.

They decided to be dickheads to elves and genocide peacefully living tribes of elves in the pursuit of land to conquer. Now my character -a half-elf- is going to try and become better and stronger so he can fuck the humans up and take back the land they took from the elves.

This is going to be interesting.

>> No.49649395

ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES ELVES

>> No.49649688

>>49611887
Any race that is so stereotypical that they have become a parody of themselves.

>> No.49649719

>People hating on fantasy races
C'mon, it's down to players to make or break a character/race, don't hate what's in the books.

>> No.49649756

>>49649719
>t. kender player

>> No.49649760

>>49649168
In STO one of the effects of fucking around with history made the Vulcans never embrace logic. The Romulans never broke off, the Klingons never got invaded by the Hruk and remained primarily arable farmers.

Then the Vulcans invented their warp drive and created the Vulcan Star Empire and enslaved or murdered everyone else in the Alpha Quadrent before discovering the Dominion and burned the galaxy in their epic glorious war with them.

>> No.49649767

>>49649395
Are you mad about elves ?

>> No.49649804

>>49613073
I think the most interesting part of dragon borns is the obsessive loyalty to family / clans. I tend to play them with a hearty dose of arrogance / racial supremacy, especially towards different dragon colours.

>> No.49650056
File: 218 KB, 475x457, 1469198323823.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49650056

>>49624326
Dunmer

>> No.49650096

>>49612587

Scottish is a typically loud, guttural language, and the Scottish accent is INVARIABLY boisterous and rollicking. These qualities would make dwarves almost completely unintelligible in the acoustics of an underground kingdom, even to eachother.

It's a ridiculous, nitpicky and wholly stupid point, but it is accurate.

>> No.49650109

I hate dark eldar.

>> No.49650125

Orcs and Dwarves
Orcs are boring rapists
Dwarves are boring midgets.

>> No.49650143
File: 105 KB, 640x400, Dragonborn_-_William_O'Connor.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49650143

Dragonborn without a doubt. Dragons should be the feared and respected powerful beings you either run away from or aspire to. They should not be a player race. I honestly think that the dragonborn race devalues the whole concept of dragons in the DnD setting.

>> No.49650147

>>49624326
People would be roleplaying stereotypes no matter what.

>> No.49650149

>>49612221
Playing a half-elf right now that's just a surly hick paladin raised by a human in the backwoods of Generic Realm. No angst, no torment, just three gallons of justice in a one gallon jug

>> No.49650151

humans.

>> No.49650184

>>49642292
N

>> No.49650204

>>49650143
Dragonborns are basically an entire race of slaves for dragons, though.
The lesser dragons are wyverns.

>> No.49650225

>>49631780

It's worth noting that this is the after-the-fact, half assed, written-by-only-half-the-creative-team-three-decades-later description of Kender.

Not that anyone cares.

>> No.49650281

>>49650225
Not that it makes any difference more likes.

Someone wrote that, and were presumably paid to write that, and thought it would be cute and adorable. For this they should be mocked.

>> No.49650368

>>49648706
But a chimp's muscles are attached on the arm differently, make dwarves look like chimps if you want that argument. I personally don't care. Call it magic, call it dwarves being humans compacted to half height same mass, whatever.

>> No.49650381

>>49650281

It's more likely that they didn't give a shit about a setting they hadn't written material for in years, and wrote thousands and thousands of pages on already. You're not entirely wrong.

>> No.49650385

>>49650204
>Dragonborns are basically an entire race of slaves for dragons, though.
The PHB describes them as sometimes faithful servants. Also as combining the best traits of dragons and humanoids, and as proud. As a race option they are mary-sues waiting to happen.
I dont'have the 4e PHB at hand, but from memory it had a similar description.

>> No.49650392

>>49649760
Sounds like trash to me.

>> No.49650505

>>49650056
Piss of n'wah

>> No.49650573

>>49611887
Can we get gifs of Riker getting BTFO by Reg

>> No.49650602

>>49611887
I don't hate them, but I don't see the purpose of Gnomes and yet they appear everywhere.

>> No.49650891

>>49650602
Personally, I'd love to see some kind of differentiation between Dwarves and Gnomes which makes them a viable race. Tinker Gnomes isn't a good option, either; whenever they don't take on the role the Dwarves do.

>> No.49651116

>>49611887

White people

>> No.49652690
File: 117 KB, 557x576, 1436235074660.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49652690

>>49611934
I played a gnome barbarian in 5e. Started out as a gardener, saved some kids from a cockatrice, became the town hero, town pooled their resources and got him some first level gear so he could "claim his destiny", but he really just wanted to be a gardener.

He didn't dress like this, but I love the face and pose too much to not post it.

>> No.49652716

Catfolk. Hate them in Elder Scrolls, hate them in anime, hated them in Pathfinder.

>> No.49652905

>>49612930
Gawd dayum.

>> No.49653131

Elves
Because of the players.

>> No.49653155

>>49651116

Fantasy race. Not master race.

>> No.49653283

>>49613177
I like my orcs fresh out of slavery and resentful about it.

>> No.49653346

>>49652716
One of those things is not like the others, anon.

>> No.49655570

>>49650184
SHIET

>> No.49655761

>>49611887
Elves, they're always portrayed as unjustifiably prudish and unpleasant.

I hate Eldar cause they try to act better than everyone else, and then proceed to fuck everything up and go home.

>> No.49655902
File: 19 KB, 286x395, 14606392_1051626491621121_4183681416394597693_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
49655902

>>49611887
Elves

From the highest spinly tower, from the most magical forest, from the depths of darkest space they come and I hate them all!

There's something just so infuriating about a race who's supposedly "made" perfect, haughty and acting all high and mighty, especially when they "guide" other races to try and make them better

Paise Slaanesh

>> No.49656056

I don't really hate races themselves so much as how a writer depicts them.

I do hate when people feel like a race includes a monolithic culture, namelist and historical tropes that must be carries over across settings and systems. Not all elves need to be skinny ladyboys with green leaf-plate armor who use bows and wizardry to almost comedic levels and they don't always have to be based on Celtic/Scandinavian myths about elves.

>> No.49656084

>>49655902
>There's something just so infuriating about a race who's supposedly "made" perfect, haughty and acting all high and mighty, especially when they "guide" other races to try and make them better
What if they're just dudes with pointy ears who are a bit more nimble but less tough than their human cousins from the other island.

>> No.49656778

49612930 shit dude...

>> No.49657140

People who play half elves should be sent to an endless hell of furry trap threads

>>
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