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37900344 No.37900344 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Greetings /tg/. I have a couple of hours free just now and will have same later. Given how much anon enjoyed the tales of Britbongsteros last time, I will continue for you all here.

>Wut is Britbongsteros?
Britbongsteros is a setting my group made up and played in about four or five years back. The world is geographically the same and mixed with mythology and a healthy dose of pure fantasy.
The OP pic is a cap of the first time we discussed the topic. I also include a link to the first thread on the subject here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/37794163/

As I go I am happy to answer any questions I can about the setting.

As a refresher I will detail the party and summarize where we got to in our adventures for any newfriends first.

>> No.37900502

>>37900344
>the party
Throughout our adventures there were always at least five of us, and usually six. These are:

>Angus
An orc from Dundee. Originally a greengrocer but also horrendously proficient with the flamethrower he carries. The flamethrower doubles as a thermic lance.

>the bard.
A human, wears a kilt, plays the bagpipes. Occasionally has great ideas. The DM uses his own taste in music for what the bard actually plays (so usually classic rock or country & western)

>Cruella
Essentially a Dark Eldar wych wearing more clothes. She is vicious and stealthy. Armed with two daggers and a sword that she talks to. Played by my then (and now again) GF. The latter fact occasionally becomes relevant which is why I mention it.

>The wizard
Not actually magic but can command metal (iron) and summon various sharp or pointy things. Including chainsaws.

>The Navvie (also called Burt)
A very large human with a hammer. He hits things with it. Has recently started to glow like a Union Jack when stuff happens. We don't know why at this stage.

>Aldous. Me. A dwarven knight. Wears full plate. Carries twin revolvers and a gatling shotgun. Smokes a pipe.

>> No.37900577

>>37900502
In our adventures we have:
Defeated the necromancers of Scotland
Helped the Queen remain in power
Sunk the German battleship the Brunmiggi
Assainated above queen
fought and annhilated French clownleechspidersnake things in the catacombs of Paris and in London
we are currently in the process of rescuing current King from Wales where he was captured and is held by rebellious Welsh beastmen.

>> No.37901629
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37901629

What happened after the cellar?

>> No.37904783

I wasn't expecting this until Sunday.

Bump dammit.

>> No.37904857

OK, now that you're off page 10, I wanted to ask what's being used for fuel in this setting.

I saw magic oil being mentioned in one of the past threads, so should I assume gasoline (or something similar) has been invented?

>> No.37905058

bump for yet another great story from Britbongsteros

>> No.37905342

>>37904783
Turns out I had less time than anticipated And Sunday would have been wiser (quickly typing this out while at pub with Cruella and co)

>>37904857
Whale oil, paraffin, steam power from coal and petrol having been discovered in Arabia but it's not quite petrol.

>>37905058
Story will continue when back from pub.

>> No.37905826

>>37905342
Or if this has fallen off board because I am an idiot I will create a new one in the morning

>> No.37905955

>>37905826
Just go enjoy your drinks.

>> No.37906016

Not sure if this was asked or answered at some point in the previous thread, but are there Viking Swedish or modern socialist Sweden?

>> No.37906811

>>37906016
It was asked thread, but it looks like it wasn't answered.

>> No.37906852

>>37906016
We never really visited but it was mentioned that Ragnarok happened. So the North lands are a bit quiet currently.

>> No.37907559

So is Australia sill just Australia?

>> No.37907944

>>37907559
I remember OP talking about how it was the most dangerous place on earth, with 1 out of 1000 criminals sent there survivng, and them essentially being One Man Armies.

>> No.37908149

>>37900344
>The locations in the first few posts
Slightly weirded out by the fact you manged to nail on the head every major location in my life... (raised in Newcastle, rest of my extended family are in Dundee, and higher education in York.)

For those of you who aren't Brits, this might not mean much, but if you were to list important cities in the UK all three of these would probably show up outside the top 10.

II'm half expecting to find out you had an adventurer hailing from the Medway towns, before buggering off to North America.

>> No.37908756

>>37907944
This is correct. It's basically catachan

>>37908149
if it helps I grew up on the east coast of Scotland, first degree in Aberdeen, second in Leeds, now work in London.

>> No.37908898
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37908898

Might as well post these

>> No.37908926
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37908926

>>37908898

>> No.37909085
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37909085

>>37908926

>> No.37909103 [DELETED] 
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37909103

>>37909085

>> No.37909147
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37909147

>>37909085

>> No.37909173
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37909173

>>37909147

>> No.37910933

Greetings /tg/. Cruella is asleep on the sofa, and I've got a six pack. I'll go as long as I can.

So, we are beneath Harlech Castle, we have found the king along with a variety of other prisoners. We take it upon ourselves to free each and every one (the Purple Penguin approves) King Algernon has very little idea what is going on but thanks us for "allowing him to continue to consider the custard." The other prisoners are a mix of general prison scum and prisoners of war, our party of 6 is now a party of 40 odd.

We decide to make for the courtyard and the sally port, then the ship.

>> No.37911067

>>37910933
We get into the courtyard just fine, it's about then that we realize we might not be the only ones to ave noticed our entrance. King Rorke and the rest of his bodyguards are facing us, and are not looking best pleased. We can fight, we can most likely take them, the question is, is it a good idea?

>> No.37911358

Here we go.

I'll keep this tab open.

>> No.37911680

>>37911067
>'dis gonna be gud...

We crack our collective necks, rack slides and generally get ready.

The bard pipes up for the first time in a while.

>guys, guys, I got this

Ok fuck it, it's not like you ever do anything anyway.

He takes a couple steps forward.

You could hear a pin drop. Prisoners and party on one side, and King Rorke and his elite on the other.

The Bard speaks.

>I like beer.

???

>> No.37911725

>>37911680
> Everyone likes beer.

ok....

>And we know trade has ceased. We have here the king of this sceptered isle, his predecessor decreed you were no longer human, no longer to be traded with, no longer to produce guiness for us, no longer to own lands, and this is why you rebelled, so were this man, this King, to reverse that, to allow the beer to flow, then what need for this rebellion be there?

>> No.37911799
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37911799

>>37911725
it's working.

Shit it's actually working.

>The bard is starting to glow, just as Navvie did previously. It's going well.

King Rorke strikes his sword into the cobblestones.

> Very well, you may....


>WAIT

It's Merlin. He looks exactly like you'd expect. It's Gandalf with a different hat.

>NO. YOU. SHALL. NOT. PASS.

>> No.37911860

>>37911799
Damn wizards, always meddling in everything.

>> No.37911877
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37911877

>>37911799
Merlin is up on the battlements. This loopy wizard is going to object to creating peace because...actually why is he doing that?

We ask him.

>Why spill more blood when we can make peace?

>Because you will never keep this promise, you will never honour your word, you will never hold true.

Fuck.

>> No.37912035

>>37911877
Rorke and his men are starting to look grumpy, getting ready to charge. Bard is no longer glowing, but he does launch into https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cQNkIrg-Tk [Hank Williams Jr, Country Boys Can Survive] looks like this is gonna end bloody. Then...Cruella does something no one expected.

She seizes the Purple Penguin. She holds him high.

>What is this childs toy? Why do we carry it? It is a symbol, a promise we made to a little girl, that we would return her toy to her, that she would not go alone into that cold dark night, that in all of the horror of the world, there was some good. Let there still be some good. Each and every warrior here will have a wife, a mother, children, why must they be without a father, a son, and a husband? This Purple Penguin is the symbol of what we fight for, and why you should let the Guiness flow.

It's not a natural 20, but it's an 19, it's enough, Merlin doesn't have an answer. Instead he levitates down to our level. Struts past Rorke and starts to chant in a language no one recognizes.

>> No.37912084

>>37912035
Rorke splits him from crown to crotch neatly with one blow of his axe.

>Peace it is.

Everybody drinks Guiness until they pass out.

That was our one and only happy ending in Britbongsteros

>> No.37912214

>>37912084
Manly tears... It is happening, OP.... It is happening...

>> No.37912437

>>37912214
Well I got a Guiness so I guess um..well just don't cry into your beer

>> No.37912814

>>37912084
Does the adventure continue?

And I'm surprised your DM let that diplomacy work.

>> No.37912982

>>37912814
It does anon but I shall have to go to bed soon, so I'll start the next episode tomorrow.

>> No.37912991

>>37911877
>Because you will never keep this promise, you will never honour your word, you will never hold true.

Crap, it's like he's dealt with London before.

>> No.37913967

Bumpan

>> No.37915313

>>37912982
I'll try to keep the thread up till then.

>> No.37916774

>>37912035
She seems to be forming a habit of making use of the Purple Penguin's max out stats.

>> No.37918772

Guess I'm bumping.

>> No.37920708

Last bump I'll be able to give it tonight.

If it wasn't enough, there's always another thread.

>> No.37921932

BUMP

>> No.37922448

bumpin

>> No.37925598

Get off of page 10.

>> No.37927721

>>37925598
Again so soon?

>> No.37929076

>>37900577
Can we get the story of the French ClownLeechSpiderSnake thingies?

>> No.37929622

>>37929076
Follow the link in the OP to the previous thread.

>> No.37931214

Bump... I guess.

>> No.37933909

I wonder if this is still happening today.

Was a different thread made and I just didn't see it?

>> No.37936098

bumping

>> No.37938986

Bumping

>> No.37940785

Bump to survive the night

>> No.37942592

Threads that go bump in the night
(well, early morning now)

>> No.37944847

Well at least someone else was bumping this.

But I don't think we're going to get a continuation of the story anytime soon.

>> No.37947088

bump

>> No.37947159

>>37912035
>What is this childs toy? Why do we carry it? It is a symbol, a promise we made to a little girl, that we would return her toy to her, that she would not go alone into that cold dark night, that in all of the horror of the world, there was some good. Let there still be some good. Each and every warrior here will have a wife, a mother, children, why must they be without a father, a son, and a husband? This Purple Penguin is the symbol of what we fight for, and why you should let the Guiness flow.

Fuck you OP, I'm at work and you made me cry like a bitch. I hope you're happy.

>> No.37947823

>>37933909
>>37936098
>>37938986
>>37940785
>>37944847

Hello anons. I'm back. I'm afraid we got the news that the man who taught me to shoot died recently and this kinda killed Sundays storytime.

Your patrience is appreciated and storytime will now continue if anon so wishes.

>>37947159
You're not the only one the Purple Penguin has made cry. I swear that that thing was a secret DM PC

>> No.37947870

>>37947823
>patrience?
What the flying fuck happens to this site when you use a mobile to post on it.

>Britbongsteros and the lucky charms

So with peace in Wales , we return to London hungover as fuck and with King Algernon and King Rorke in tow. Due to some fantastic
> I roll to seduce
Angus appears to have been the only person in Wales (in Britbongsteros) to have fucked an actual sheep.

With the Kings in London we hang around for a bit, taking a couple days off for R n R while they negotiate. Most of it is spent laughing at Angus who seems to have gotten a souveneir from his beau.

During our time (in the pub) we learn that there is a mysterious ship moored in the Thames and that the advisor who was so in favour of Algie invading Wales wants to see us.

>> No.37947913

>>37947823
Fantastic.
Sorry for your loss.
Woop, storytiem

>> No.37947931

>>37947870
>Who is the adviser Dm?

>Richard the third duke of Bosworth and blackadder, master of Dunny on the Wold.

>Richard the Third?

>Richard III

>Of Bosworth

>DM....

>> No.37947967

>>37947931
So we travel to Cutlers hall where tricky dicky wants to meet us. We are expecting hunchbacked evil Richard, what we get is a Broad shouldered man, with a huge beard, strongfat as fuck and with a big booming laugh. It's Brian blessed and the Kings second bastard cousin.

He is with one Samuel Johnson and one Ollie Cromwell.

Together they represent His Majesties most treasured advisors. The Privy Council.

>Who is....

Google it.

>> No.37948015

>>37947967
It seems we have developed a reputation for solving problems and the kingdom has two. One is nascent, a vessel full of Arab Princes has come to visit with a view to British investment in extracting oil from their lands. Sir Hobart and The Old Gang believe this could be used to fuel several new weapons of war. Including something called a "Land Cruiser" designs of which show great long caterpillar tracks and batteries of turreted cannons. The Privy Council will keep us posted on this project.

Richard starts munching on an entire roasted pig as Oliver Cromwell outlines what will be our next task while a prototype of this vehicle is built.

>A modest proposal on the Irish Question

>> No.37948048

>>37948015
Blackadder (No.3, I'm guessing?)
Richard III, via Brian Blessed
Oliver "fuck christmas and the Irish" Cromwell
Samuel "Big Dick...tionary" Johnson

And Hobart, of the Funnies.

Oh god, I forgot how much I love your setting/DM

>> No.37948162

>>37948015
While Blackadder's servant Baldrick pours drinks, we listen to Crommie explain the problem.

>Eire Delenda Est...

The Irish have been raiding across the Irish sea, the entire west coast is almost unlivable, British warships are being lost to the allies of the Irish, the so called "Deep ones."

Our mission? End the threat of the Irish.

How?

The Irish are mostly human barbarians (sorry Ireland) who have a portal to another dimension/world somewhere near Waterford. It is from this that they are summoning Pacific Rim style gribblies. Sir Hobart and his colleague (one Barnes Wallis) have contrived an explosive with high plasticity and excellent explosives properties. "Conflagration causing caustic cement" or C4

>> No.37948198

>>37948162
We are to destroy the portal and a seaborne invasion of troops (including the prototype Land Cruiser) can deal with the humans. The Irish can summon monsters faster than we can build ships so with the portal atomised the navy can deal with Cthulu and pals but not before.

Victory brings glory and medals.

Failure will bring us a Victoria cross

>isn't that good?

No it means we will be crucified

>> No.37948211

>>37948198
Now as anon may recall I do actually work so updates will occur throughout the day but on and off. Breaks should be of no longer than two hours.

>> No.37948236

>>37948198
How we get to Waterford is an interesting question. Or it would be, if we didn't have a pirate ship moored off Harlech castle and the 38 Minutes keeping an eye on it. We return to Harlech and prepare.

>> No.37949876

Reading this now.

>> No.37950190
File: 534 KB, 832x1119, Samuel_Johnson_by_Joshua_Reynolds_2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37950190

>>37947967
>googles it
Oh shit, Samuel Johnson is this fucker. That's awesome.

>> No.37950241
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37950241

>>37948198
>Warships versus cthulus
Can't wait man.

>> No.37950380

>>37948211
or maybe I meant 2-4 hours, but anyway.

>>37948236
So, now in Harlech, King Rorke came back with us, he and the King (or rather Blackadder and co) having agreed to allow free trade and the Welsh are now people again.

We had the option of taking the HMS Trafalgar - a RN Submarine but decided the pirate ship would be more subtle, so the Trafalgar will linger off Waterford as long as she can, to be summoned by signal flare (or she will run the fuck away if Cthulu is spotted).

The voyage is uneventful, we land near Tramore, then it's just a matter of following the great green glowy thing that we can see in the sky. It's half submerged in the bit on Google Maps called The Gap.

Now a note on the Irish. As mentioned they're human, they're armed with sharp sticks. They will attack us on sight. With our weaponry we can annhilate a whole whole lot of them, however the DM is very careful to inform us that as soon as a shot is fired or the alarm raised, we will have about 15 minutes in game until Cthulu or his cousin comes to try and find us.

>> No.37950447

>>37950380
The countryside as we cross it is green, not the healthy emerald isle green, but slime green, there are shoggoth looking things squelching across the land in the distance, lit against the stars by the way colours shift within them, like a land based aurora borealis. The land is nothing like you'd expect Ireland, it's not a wasteland, it's just...alien.

Plant things we don't recognise, reptilian things in the sky. Small tiny little flying fish that bite like mosquitos. The sounds of the night as we carefully navigate the sucking mire of the coast are just wrong, what could be frogs screech, what might be fish croak, what definitely aren't foxes make pings and clicks like dolphins. Strange dark shapes move in the water, faces appear and dissappear in puddles an inch deep.

On the skyline great huge shapes move inland, some humanoid, some that defy imagination, and others we don't want to imagine.

Toward the gap the great arch of the portal rises from the waters, spinning with green lightning, we can taste magic in the air. Not the ozone of earthly magic, this is a clinging filth that makes you spit black. From the portal there is a great flash and a huge tail with a great staring luminous eye on it appears from nowhere and slowly submerges as it slides down toward Dunmore.

It's a lovely place.

>> No.37950615

Flying fish things that bite like mosquitoes... I already want to see this all burn.

>> No.37951933

I wonder if they brought the famine upon themselves with their summoning in this setting.

>> No.37951979

>>37950615
Well they've been contracted by Cromwell, so it may well do

>> No.37952856

>>37950447
bump for the queen and fascist regime

>> No.37953318

>>37950447

>The Purple Penguin Abides
We cross overland without incident, if thoroughly and completely freaked the fuck out. Britbongsteros is not a nice place but this is new, this is bad. Angus and I are hauling heavy satchels of C4 and as we get closer to the gate we start to realize just how big it is. The flickering eldritch lightning isn't helping either.

We come upon the gate just inland of it. We're pleasantly surprised that there doesn't seem to be anyone around the thing. Maybe the fish thing we saw earlier was the last to come through for the night?

We start to feel on edge, Cruella's hair is standing on end, my beard is bristling, change of plan.

>> No.37953485

>>37953318
We retreat to a safer distance as the gate starts to flicker, to shift, to twist, almost biologically, flexing like muscle, peristaltic shifting within it.

>THOOOOOOOM

the lightning blasts outward on a level we feel more than hear, and something else slips away into the waters.

We estimate it was about 45 minutes since we saw it land, and we start to really hope that the HMS Trafalgar is still off shore.

It's then we see the barbarians (I'm not going to call them Irish). They approach the gate furtively, like they're afraid of what it could do to them, they start to chant, to cavort, some sacrifice, driving prisoners into pits at the bottom of the pillars, others stroke and caress the mass of it. It's like they're refuelling it. A priest is rowed out into the middle of the thing, and slits open the still living body of [we are going to pretend it was a sheep because I feel sick typing this] and [removes the unborn lamb from its womb] and kills it.

The small body he holds starts to glow, and he tosses the green shining corpses into the inky black waters.

Lightning starts to play up the arc, and the glow comes from within the waters.

It appears they've summoned another.

We also have our timeframe.

45 minutes recharge, five minutes to refuel, and then the natives disappear.


One hushed conference later and we agree, we have a plan.

>> No.37953633

Oh boy, The Gap is probably gonna be filled with bodies by the time this is over.

>> No.37953636

>>37953485
>It's a shit plan.

We wait, we wait for the next summoning to complete. Then...

We wait. We wait for those five minutes for the barbarians to dissipate. Then we charge.

We're about 150 yards from the gate when we're spotted, a wedge of dirty, malnourished, and zealously frenzied barbarians forming almost from nowhere.

The DM starts timing us. 15 Minutes to Cthulu.

The barbarians form a shield wall. There's six of us. What can we do against 500 odd men?

We form a straight line. Six abreast and move forward in pace with the bard. He runs surprisingly fast but stops at 30 ft and plays. He plays https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V88ydbx5-4A [Man O'war, Defender]

Then we simply charge. Straight into that mass of humanity, slaves of the dark ones, they form a shield wall.


The Navvies hammer breaks shields, Angus turns men into screaming pillars of flame, where they don't simply melt. The gatling shotgun makes a fine red mist. Cruella laughs and moves so fast you can barely work out her motions until she stops to spit out a mouthful of jugular. The Wizard simply drives one sharpened stake through man, after man, after man.

We massacre them. Wading through blood and offal to the sacrifice pits.

Looking back on it now, sitting in my safe warm study, pipe in hand and Cruella playing with a dog nearby, those warriors spoke as they died. Each and every one, and they thanked us.

They thanked us for saving them.

>> No.37953691

>>37953636
>They thanked us for saving them.
This game can truly be described as Epic without hyperbole.

>> No.37953747

>>37953636
We feel literally and figuratively filthy as we start to prime the charges.

The silence is the worst, after the screams. After the cacophony.

There's a shape on the horizon, a shape like a great, crystalline structure, that walks with the gait of a man and the step of a bear, it can't be looked at for long, and it's coming our way.

We thought to wire the charges in a neat demolition pattern, the wizard would bore into the pillars, and we would place shaped charges, we thought.

>We thought.

We didn't think that these things were operated by blood sacrifice.

The gate is starting to glow already. We didn't summon Cthulu, The barbarians did that.

>We just summoned Cthulu's dad.

We simply toss the bags of C4 in, fire the signal flare and turn tail.

>> No.37953797

>>37953747
Well... shit.

>> No.37953880

>>37953747
Thing is.

That great big shape on the horizon is catching up on us. It's ten minutes run to the Trafalgar, even if she's there. If she hasn't been sunk. We set the charges for two and whatever the thing on the horizon is, it's about ten minutes away.

It's gonna be fine, it's gonna be tight.

We run. We run like crazy.

The charges go off. We don't even look back. The pillar comes down, Magic blasting out, throwing us flat. The shockwave blowing us off our feet. Heat on our exposed skin.

We can't hear, we can barely see, magical lightning spearing into the ground around us. Throwing up great spumes of earth.

The beast is catching up. By the time we're on the dunes, down at Dunmore East, it's right behind us. It's right there. It's literally on us. It's ...indescribable.

Out in the dark, we can see the Trafalgar. She's not alone. The beasts of the waves have risen. The Trafalgar and the entire Atlantic fleet lay into every filthy beast your mind can imagine, lit in flashes of lightning, strobing slaughter, guns fire, ships are torn asunder, beasts scream, everything dies.

There's something small coming for us. It's one of the Trafalgar's boats. A steam pinnace.

Thing is the beast on shore is at least as fast as it.

>> No.37953953

>>37953636
>''They tanked us for saving them.''
It's macabre, really... But this setting still looks like the most awesome thing the humanity has ever seen, i just want to play it soooo bad...

>> No.37954020

>>37953880
We are stuck.

We can dig in, try and hamstring it maybe? We can...

>The Navvie passes DM a note.

>"Bard. Play me something good. I go to glory."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-reAahY1GCE [Jeff Wayne's Thunderchild]

The night is black, rent asunder by shot, ethereal lightning, and the sound of a countryside dying, and in that darkness, the Navvie starts to glow. Stripes of Red, White, and Blue.

Saltire first, cross of St George next, and finally St Patrick's Saltire. Overlaid across his broad, broad back.

We move to stand with him.

>Go boys. Go.

>> No.37954054

>>37954020
>Go.

I shake his hand. I press something into that broad paw of a hand. A small, purple, penguin.

He tucks him into his shirt, and starts to walk forward. A small glowing flag into the blackness of the night.

>> No.37954071

>>37954054
Epic final stand? It looks like an epic final stand to me...

>> No.37954083

>>37954054
That was the last we saw of him.

The beast stopped in its tracks. Raised one great foot, and slammed it down on that little flag.

We watched from the beach, then the pinnace.

It raised its foot, and that proud little flag still stood.

It began to climb.

>> No.37954114

>>37954083
As we boarded the Trafalgar, we saw the beast fall, the Union Jack atop it's great head. As the Trafalgar began to sink beneath the waves, we saw that little flag cease to glow.

>> No.37954115

>>37954083
Noooo! Not the penguin!!!

>> No.37954178

>>37954114
and that anon, is where this episode of Britbongsteros ends.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQcgUlkUv10 [Saxon, Broken Heroes.]

>> No.37954234

Whew, typing that all out was exhausting. I'll tell you what happens next before bedtime.

>> No.37954294
File: 35 KB, 500x379, we-have-feels-over-here.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37954294

>>37954083

>> No.37955602

Alright /tg/ do you have any questions before I move on? Feel free to ask and I'll try and field them as I go.

>> No.37955631

God Damn.

You have one hell of a group, and your setting is fantastic

>> No.37955705

>>37955602
So the penguin belonged to the Navvie's nice, but your character was the one who always carried it around, right?

makes sense that you gave it to him before his heroic last stand, but did he ever question why you were the one who was always carrying it around?

>> No.37955755

>>37955705
Yeah, I guess I was the one who picked it up, and I've always quite liked penguins. Just seemed to make sense.

>> No.37955908

>>37954178
There is an epilogue to this episode however.

We returned to Waterford the next day. The remains of the atlantic and home fleets licking their wounds in the channel, the Trafalgar took us back to say a few words.

We went ashore and took a shovel.


The Bard plays https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYGtXcDRoi0 [Amazing Grace, Royal Scots Dragoon Guards] as we walk up the beach.

We approach that great huge corpse, already rotting in the sun, seagulls (because seagulls don't give a fuck) picking at it.

Within the great sundered skull, split right down the middle, we find first a sodden, bloodied, slightly torn purple penguin.

Then within that skull, a hammer, and a body.


>Captcha - Somad

>> No.37955950

>>37955908
We start to dig. In that blasted tortured land. The flower of the British Navy burns off shore, great huge elder things lie on the beach, rotting in the sun.

Britain, this great Britain, is united once more, we did that. This man did that. This penguin did that.

We pick him up.

>He coughs.

>motherfucker.

>> No.37955999

>>37955950
Oh SHHIIIIIIT.

Was this the DM throwing you a bone?

>> No.37956070

>>37955999
Well that adventure very nearly broke us. However I wouldn't have put it past them to have planned it.

>> No.37956119

>>37956070
Well I guess you exaggerated for dramatic effect when you said that was the last you saw of him.

>> No.37956714

>>37956119
>>37956119
I suppose I should have said "that night" but that'd have ruined the effect a little. I thought /tg/ might prefer to experience it as we did.

>DM you're a dick.

>> No.37957352

>>37956714
I'm gonna be honest here. I don't play traditional games. Like, ever. But stuff like this makes me wish I could get a group going so bad it is not even funny anymore.

also bump for amazing setting and threads

>> No.37958166

>>37957352
The sad thing is group drifted apart so this has all been a walk down memory lane for me

>> No.37958237

Now /tg/ I think I've told you about everything I said I would. There is more but I will save that for tomorrow or when I next get a chance. I can do some questions if there are any left?

I think there's about three or so more tales left in Britbongsteros.

>> No.37958993

>>37958237
Did/do you have some sort of "setting bible", or other form of notes that laid out the land and power structure of Britbongsteros?

And what system were you using? (sorry if you've answered that one, I missed it if you did)

Because frankly this is awesome, and it'd be great if other people could experience what you created as a group

>> No.37959099

>>37958993
To be honest the only stuff we used was 20 + change years of being from Britbongland and made up a load of stuff as we went. It all started out quite innocently in DwarfYorkshire and grew arms and legs from there.

>> No.37959169
File: 394 KB, 1274x1388, 1393653694835.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37959169

>>37958237
Why is there no Japan in your setting? I understand hating weeaboo shit but there is way more to Japan than weeaboo shit. Pic sorta how I see the wizard.

>> No.37959218

>>37959169
Because our group had a very unpleasant time with all things "katanas are underpowered in D20" so we just ruled that Japan no longer exists. Try it.

Godzilla still exists though.

>> No.37959308

>>37959169
And before someone posts
>nofunallowed.jpg

Thats not to say you can't invent a setting Where Japan exists etc etc. Knock yourself out.

>> No.37959318

>>37959218
That's fair enough. I've personally never had anyone actually try and play with katanas, but I can understand how that kind of bullshit can ruin games(black-powder no longer works in any game that I run). Would have gone the ultra-xenophobic "nobody goes there and there's no reason to go there" route but that's just me, you gotta do what you gotta do what you think is right for your particular group.

>> No.37959405

>>37959318
good idea but we tried that.
>well ok I'm just the one samurai who was sent away to regain my honnah...
No
>shipwreck samurai!
No
>magic samurai!
No.

DM: look fuck it. Japan was destroyed totally. No survivors. The end.

>oh ok, how about I roll a bard?

This worked for us but I'm sure it'd make a three hundred page thread on /tg/ so let's not, it's a debate for another thread and another time.

>> No.37959427

>>37959405
(By the way this was how we got bagpipe bard above)

>> No.37959517
File: 489 KB, 656x425, 1388254405102.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37959517

>>37959427
Whelp. Nevermind then. In the same situation I would have done the exact same thing.

>> No.37959548

>>37959517
Don't get me wrong. We love the guy that played bard, but he just needs...some gentle reminding at times.

>> No.37959678
File: 1023 KB, 500x465, YOU KILLED A CAT IN ULTHAR YOU FUCKING IDIOT.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37959678

>>37959548
Nah dude, I totally understand. It's kinda the same thing with the reason black-powder no longer works in my games. Dude whose responsible for it is an awesome guy, and one of the best RPers I know, but can go off the deep end when guns and gun accessories are involved. Pic related.

>> No.37962336

Three more stories, huh?

>> No.37963757

>>37962336
More storytiem sounds delicious.

>> No.37966539

I'll give it a bump for the night.

>> No.37967764

bump

>> No.37968216

Good morning anon. I still can't believe this thing grew out of one tiny little acorn of a post.

Now after after the grimdark of Ireland we had a fairly light and fluffy adventure or at least silly adventure at the North Pole. I dunno if it's what /tg/ wants to hear about but it's that or I skip to how the final two campaigns.

>> No.37969648

>>37968216
North pole sounds fun

>> No.37969832
File: 80 KB, 537x730, Osos con armas_07.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
37969832

>>37968216
Northwards Ho! Ho! Ho!

>what could go wrong?

>> No.37970684

>>37968216
Don't skip anything.

>> No.37972082

This thread still has plenty of life left in it.

Bump.

>> No.37974170

Keeping it up for tales of further adventures.

>> No.37974251

>>37972082
I'm a bit freaked out on how bloody long this has survived.

>> No.37974484

>>37974251
Not counting the sticky, this isn't even the oldest thread up on /tg/ right now.

>> No.37976366

It fell back to page 10 rather quickly.

>> No.37977188

>>37976366
yes it did. I suppose I should really provide some content.

You know you can all discuss the setting while I'm not here? As opposed to just bumping.

>Britbongsteros at the North Pole.

We return to London and meet with the privy council. We are informed we are being sent on holiday.

Or at least away.

An expedition to the artic has reported no sign of a north west passage but it has found land. Under the polar ice cap. Reports by carrier albatross are notably unreliable but nothing else has been heard for six months. Fearing the intervention of a foreign (German) power we are sent northwards.

Meanwhile Britbongsteros is being drained dry, victory in Ireland has been costly and with the continentals now aware that the navy is effectively half what it once was, it seems like we may have a fight on our hands soon.

>> No.37977226

>>37977188
The events in Ireland have already been hushed up under the official secrets act and the Navvie if questioned says he remembers nothing. Even a session with Sir Richard Bacon provides no answer to his mysterious powers.

We are instead packed aboard an icebreaker and sent onwards.

>> No.37977499

>>37977226

Hmm this is going down the board fast. I could just make a new thread at the weekend. That might be easier for anon.

>> No.37977518

>>37977188
I'm not entirely sure what to discuss in this setting.

I mean, I'm thinking about things that could happen in it, like the Easter Island heads are actually magical stone mechs that the islanders use to wage war upon the cannibals.
But my main interest right now is hearing what you actually did in it.

>> No.37977755

>>37977499
If you think that'd be better, I don't mind waiting either way.

>> No.37978304

>>37977755
Yeah I shall continue this at the weekend. Hopefully no one else will die and we can do Sunday again.

>> No.37980040

>>37978304
This has been an insane ride

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