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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.37483898 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

What do tau do for fun?

I need to know for reasons.

>> No.37483915


Be disgusting and not sexually appealing.

>> No.37483916

Does "fun" contribute to the Greater Good?

>> No.37483919

Serve the Greater Good. There is only the Greater Good. To not Greater Good is no good.

>> No.37483924

Clump together in a big pile and oil each other.

>> No.37483931

they don't do anything for fun

because they're asians in a society largely concerned with military conquest

>> No.37483933

>wasting valuable lubricants


>> No.37483957

Her hooves are wrong.

>> No.37483963

And the boobs and hair.

>> No.37483994



Fun doesn't exist

>Loosely Based on Imperial Japan

Fun, if it somehow exists, is illegal, and dishonabru, unless Fun is actually writing more propaganda.

>Assuming "Fun" means breeding without the express purpose of pumping out more servants of the Greater Good.

That's a Mindworm, Breeding outside your caste and xenophile relations either gets a mindworm or you disappear forever.

>> No.37483995

Communists don't have fun, OP.

>> No.37483997

Eh, I'm less bothered by that. Tau are Star Trek rubber forehead aliens, of course they have the same sexual dimorphism as humans. GW just never got over its twelve-year-old girls are icky phase. Why do you suppose Sisters of Battle are all man-jawed drag queens?

>> No.37484018


>> No.37484022


As one anon pointed out in a thread a while back, the reason Tau even HAVE Hooves instead of some other arrangement is because GW failed to make sandals / Geta / other Pan-Asian footwear sufficiently sci-fi.

>> No.37484037

> Do things for the good of the community

What if the community is incredibly horny?

>> No.37484039

That makes a surprising amount of sense.

>> No.37484048


>> No.37484069

Yeah, but if they're gonna charge us 50$/miniature, the least they could do is get creative.

I'm aware this is asking too much.

>> No.37484071


Then the community engages in several studies on how to curb their physical desires and put forth more effort into their work for the Greater Good.

>> No.37484083


I know right? It works so well because GW is both lazy enough and uninspired enough to do exactly that.

>> No.37484089

You are assuming that the concept of the Greater Good is the same in the horny community as it is in the Tau Empire itself.

>> No.37484102

>> No.37484115


The community has since then disappeared, the Tau Empire reports that it was a Terrorist Attack by particularly clever Tyranids.

>> No.37484157

Last thing I want is for GW to get creative. They'll just fuck it up and make something horrific. More dreadknights and aborted rat fetuses. No thank you, just give me WW1 tanks in space and medieval shit for WHFB.

>> No.37484183

>What do tau do for fun?
They die.
End of story Imperial Citizen.

I remember thinking TAU were some sort of robot race and allied with reptiles (or whatever kroot are) and insects just because and then I saw the truth.

>> No.37484213

What paygroup?
Bourgeois? Kinda rich? Avarage? not tau pay? poor?

Well to solve the question anyway, what would a modern chinese person do in 90's china do?

>> No.37484222


Technically the Tau aren't even really "allied" with the Kroot so much as employ the FUCK out of them, Kroot are a mercenary species through and through, and Vespids are heavily implied to be Mind-controlled.

>> No.37484268

>Why do you suppose Sisters of Battle are all man-jawed drag queens?
because they were hand-sculpted twenty years ago

More importantly, why do you care?

>> No.37484278

Uh... 90s stuff?

>> No.37484296


Nothing changes except it's slightly more acceptable to be caught throwing your newborn daughter into a river.

>> No.37484309

Minor capitalistic dictatorship behind lies of freedom and democracy, their ability to have fun is severely hindered by how foreign from han tau they are and how close to the people controlling the state is.

>> No.37484310

>or whatever kroot are
They're birds.

Kroot are much more interesting than the Tau, too. Shame they'll never ever get another plastic kit.

>> No.37484315

A modern chinese person in 90's china would marvel at how clean the air was, and then rush off to change the past in ways that would benefit themselves, same as any one else naturally.

>> No.37484330

Of course they don't have the knowledge of that they are in the past, just the mindset of an modern Chinese.

>> No.37484337


>and then rush off to change the past in ways that would benefit themselves

And then they would get run over in the middle of a street and no one will even notice.

>> No.37484395

Kroot are mad kawaii. There are always Kroot mercenaries doing Kroot things in our FFG campaigns.

>> No.37484421


>> No.37484422

I hope you're kidding

>> No.37484426

Sports, games of chance and leisure, watching Ethereal vidcon propaganda, relaxing with friends.

>> No.37484430


Is it even possible to get run over in china? Chinese drivers tend to be super careful about not running people over.

>> No.37484456

sounds like he touched a nerve

>> No.37484479

The same thing an necromundian in the middle part of the hive can do, just with less "HATE THE XENO/MUTANT/BLEH" and more "HATE ANYONE WHO ISN'T IN ON THE TAU WAY OF LIFE!"

>> No.37484504

I picture Tau life to be sort of like Starship Troopers. The power armor aspect helps.

>> No.37484524

Must be a man-jawed drag queen.

>> No.37484533

Exactly. Rogue Trader's the best because we can actually groove with them without having to chimp out about Muh Imperium and other silly shit.

>> No.37484543

Yes because without it the tau will lose efficiency in their normal tasks. Every tau gets time for fun, just some more than others. (Though i'm certain many would find their normal jobs fun.)

>> No.37484553

Son't forget alcohol.

There was a story about a Tau Water Caste and a human Trader getting drunk in a spac bar in the 3e codex?

>> No.37484559

They're supposed to be Asian so I'm gonna say they do a lot of recreational math.

>> No.37484570

I know there's supposed to an asian thing with them, but I just don't see it. They're too innovative and advanced.

>> No.37484623

They're a mashup of a bunch of Asian stereotypes through the filter of the early 2000s anime boom as imagined by British nerds who don't actually know anything about Asians or anime.

>> No.37484660

I get that, and it shows their writers didn't actually know anything. The Tau are able to come off as slightly more alien in that regard, albeit with a 1984-ish vibe.

>> No.37484662


Torch uppity Gue'la.

>> No.37484676

Pretty cozy inside those battlesuits, huh?

>> No.37484681


>> No.37484701


>> No.37484740

>They're too innovative and advanced.
yeah, asians

Water caste are a bit of an exception, since their whole craft is socializing. Drinking with people you do business deals with is essentially the standard across the globe.

>> No.37484772

With such an emphasis on propaganda, you just know there's gotta be tau who work on smutty blueberry comics for dissemination in the gue'la ghettos.

>> No.37484793

>yeah, asians
don't match them, like i said. maybe if they were building less-advanced knock-off tech stolen with hackers.

>> No.37484826

Just stomp them and take their good bitz. Like any proper ork would do.

>> No.37484828

Maybe a Tau just supervises it, and leaves the smut to Gue'vesa since they'd know best what their fellows want.

Their humans are all sterile anyway so they need some distractions.

>> No.37484829

The was less do with business and more enjoying the company of a friend.

Also fire caste warriors drink alcohol

>> No.37484852

I dunno you'd have to ask one of the slavs on /pol/ what commies do for fun.

>> No.37484866


>> No.37484887

We know what they do for fun, though. They cheeki breeki and squat around.

>> No.37484909

>less do with business
>"we get together to trade and talk"

>> No.37484928

Meditating, community meals with close comrades, a thoughtful walk through an inspiring earth caste garden, writing haiku-like poems, distantly but interested checking up on the progress of one's prodigy, respectfully spend time with a Partner that one would ask some procreation council to have as potential procreation partner for the next procreation-cycle

>> No.37484937

That's a bit inaccurate, since the majority of the time they simply won't acknowledge females exist at all, let alone depict them.

>> No.37484943

Butt Stuff

>> No.37484958

Butte Hold?

>> No.37484963

Which is why you end up with errors like the wrong hooves and too many fingers.

>> No.37485007

Aren't they fucking hideous along with the males?

>> No.37485019

Off to the Reeducation and Sterilization Camps with you, Gue'la

>> No.37485061

GW has literally a single female tau character and most of the official art of her is wretched. So, kinda hard to say.

>> No.37485101

I've seen another. When they're eating blue burritos together.
Oh, ya do wot?

>> No.37485103

Daemons of the warp call her the Ice Queen.

A human girl called her the Star princess.

Clearly, she possesses regal beauty.

>> No.37485116


>> No.37485161

Thank you.

>> No.37485189

>> No.37485211

>tfw sterilisation camps is code word for human/tau dating events

>> No.37485221

That's fan art.

>> No.37485228

>yfw the Imperium's version of /pol/ thinks the Tau want to "race mix" humanity into extinction

>> No.37485242

You're gonna get extra sterilized.

>> No.37485271

The children would look hideous.

>> No.37485293

>You will never get extra sterilized by a qt air caste sky captain, a hearty earth caste engineer, a fierce and loyal fire caste officer or a classy water caste diplomat

>> No.37485312

Blueberries are canon, the ambassador caste is bred and trained specifically to appeal to their target civilization.

You won't find the busty taugirls in battlesuits, you'll find 'em entertaining inquisitors.

>> No.37485315

when did this retarded meme start anyway?? That's not what tau women look like

>> No.37485316

What about milf ethereal cast?

>> No.37485328

Earth caste: Mexicans
Fire caste: Niggers
Water caste: Jews
Ethereal caste: Whites
Air caste: ?

>> No.37485331

>respectfully spend time with a Partner that one would ask some procreation council to have as potential procreation partner for the next procreation-cycle

>> No.37485339

>busty taugirls
>entertaining inquisitors.
Well I suppose that's accurate although the Inquisition may have a different opinion on what constitutes "xenos entertainment"

>> No.37485340 [SPOILER] 

More like the busty pilots are busy.

>> No.37485350

/pol/imps pls stop

>> No.37485351

You can kindly fuck right off. We're talking about sexy tau in this thread.

>> No.37485360

Here's you reply. You can go away now

>> No.37485386


>new guy came to the battlefield
>been here for a day
>armor still painted
>no bullet holes
>no chainsaw marks
>no battle scars
>mfw he acts like he saw some shit

>> No.37485389

I could have sworn there's a version of this in color

>you will never spend all day fighting alongside your fellow Gue'Vesa auxiliaries for the Greater Good, then come home to your prefab living unit to spend time with your blueberry love muffin

>> No.37485404

>implying a tau that got chainsword marks on his gear actually survived the encounter

>> No.37485411

Your're right. You're never going to do that because miscegenation is forbidden.

>> No.37485420

no you fuck off. This is MLP level shit right there.

>> No.37485422

Imperium of /pol/, pls. This isn't Space Alabama.

>> No.37485430


i-i swear i got them in b-battle

>> No.37485431

Sure if the tau won't give up their blueberries all the humans just up and leave.

>> No.37485444

No, THIS is some MLP level shit right here.

>> No.37485473

It actually might be. The Ethereals already banned interbreeding between Tau castes. What makes you think they'd allow the Tau to breed with humans if it's even possible to begin with?

You are now imagining Taumblr where all the humans complain about inter-species marriage

>> No.37485476

/pol/ doesn't enter into it. The Tau Empire is a strictly regimented society with a caste system and structured breeding programs. The water bureaucrat at the Department of Eugenics isn't going to sign off on your procreation certificate so you can stick your dick in an earth chick.

>> No.37485481

Work with Gue'vesa for the greater good.

>> No.37485486

Castes can't interbreed, m8. lrn2tau.

>> No.37485496

They might be open to allow for recreational intercourse however if those are not capable of producing offspring.

>> No.37485499

>sex is only about reproduction
Imperium of /pol/, alright. "muh degeneration"

Humans in Tau territories are all sterile anyway.

>> No.37485516

You just had that lying around, huh?

>> No.37485534

It certainly does seem to be that way for the Tau who are a heavily regimented society. Unless you are suggesting that Tau regularly intermarry between castes but breed solely within castes

>The Cuck Empire

>> No.37485535

The subject of breeding was brought up in the Damocles Crusade. The Water Caste guy told the Gue'vesa that humans have to embrace the Greater Good but Tau culture (Caste Sysyem) is for the Tau themselves and humans can freely choose to adopt any aspect of it if they wished.

Since humans can't interbreed with Tau and there is no law against humans and Tau fugging, the question is why not?

>> No.37485545

That looks more like orks, bulky bodies, the armor looks like the one ork boys use and there's a choppa up in the middle.

Stupid rebels can't even differentiate between aliens, clearly they are a danger to us all and our beloved slav- I mean fellow followers of the greater good.

>> No.37485556

I would hit her with a force of a chainaxe

>> No.37485557

>Humans in Tau territories are all sterile anyway.

The Gue'vesa are mostly descendants of the First Damocles Crusade era humans who joined the empire. Sterile? I think not.

>> No.37485577


Yeah, it's by the same guy who did that corpse Emperor pic that also gets posted a lot.


Probably more accurate than 99% of female Tau fanart though.

Also, in a rare twist, the bare head option on Shadowsun's mini has a much better-looking face than any of her official illustrations. A-at least I think so.

>> No.37485578

since it's humans lining up to ditch fellow humans and fug Tau, I'd say we should be more concerned with the Imperium of Cucks.

>mfw humans all want the BBLM (big blueberry love muffins)

>> No.37485584

>but Tau culture (Caste Sysyem) is for the Tau themselves
You answered your own question. The Tau women would refuse on account of that culture
>trusting xenos

>> No.37485592

Yes, dem rebel grey skinz iz bad for our greetur gud. Now where do ya keep all da dakka?

>> No.37485617

>The Tau women would refuse on account of that culture
pure conjecture. the Greater Good nowhere excludes non-reproductive sex for recreational purposes.

>> No.37485622

Well it may not be lore that sterilization is forbidden but i do know that couples and love IS forbidden.

Do the reeducation camps with you guela, you must learn that the state chooses everything for you, for the greater good.

>> No.37485628

Not really that hard to beat the official art. It is, however, significantly uglier than the XV-22 helmet.

Shadowshit a shiiit. Fusion blasters? I'd probably use her if she could take plasma rifles or missile pods. Hell, even burst cannons.

>> No.37485631

>You answered your own question. The Tau women would refuse on account of that culture

They have no reason to refuse other than sexual or preference since it doesn't break the law in any way.

Also cultural barriers can be defeated with love.

>> No.37485632

>pure conjecture.
The same could be said of your masturbatory fantasy

>> No.37485648

She does look better, less old wrinkle face. It's more of "Look at that strong faced tau guy!...That's a girl?! Ooohhh."

>> No.37485652

>pick up some war stragglers
>forcibly conquer others
>"lining up to ditch fellow humans"
Cuck logic at its finest

>> No.37485712

I would hit her with an actual chainaxe.

>> No.37485741


That nose looks terrible. And her face is quite bland.

>> No.37485744

Yes, your post is fine cuck logic. The Imperium of Cuckoldry would know best.

>> No.37485753

Oi, woz diz den? You gray 'ummie runtz mukkin about touchin' da dakka of da greetur gud?

Git stuck in wiff them there rebelz or i'll steril-Steriloi-I'LL CUT OF YA KNOB AS 'ARD AS I AM NOB AUN'RUNTSMASHA!

>> No.37485769

>your masturbatory fantasy
better than your man-jawed sisters of battle

>> No.37485808

can someone explain the cuck meme?

>> No.37485848

Cuck is when you take your wife to a buddy or stranger and watch them fuck while they make fun of your tiny penis.

>> No.37485895

Now I'm picturing some crazy ork nob leading humans and he's decked out with all the dakka.

>> No.37485896

It's /v/.

Any time you see a nigga saying cuck, now you'll be extra aware of the /v/ amongst us.

>> No.37485897

So it is a simple excuse to jerk off. Good of you to admit it.

>out of arguments
Isn't it "that time of the week" for you and your gf?

Moot had a girlfriend or something like that. /pol/ found out she was being unfaithful (or so the story goes) and started teasing him about it. Moot nuked /pol/ (for various reasons) and added word filters like 4chan=cuckchan. Thus cucking became a /pol/ meme

>> No.37485910


/v/ and /pol/ and maybe /tv/ all just learned what cuckolding is. I guess.

>> No.37485925

It's not a meme(Well not by the faggots on /v/'s definition at least), it's a word describing being cuckolded, being cheated on by your loved ones or something related on something that will in no way benefit you or in the end just go to shit for you.

For example: An well endowed african american male has for the last six months been fucking your waifu, she makes no effort to hide it from you and she now says she loves the stranger more than you.

>> No.37485946

No. It came up because they were calling someone one.

>> No.37485947

It's most recent way of insulting someone's manhood. There is no point in taking heed of it, it's completely lost any substance by this point.

>> No.37485980

Compared to all the other, male or assumed-to-be-male Tau faces, her features are pretty distinct. Though the 3rd edition Ethereal's facial structure stands out a bit too.

>> No.37485998

>So it is a simple excuse to jerk off. Good of you to admit it.

Speaking for myself, It's an excuse for me to write a heartwarming interspecies union. Two souls rising over the hatred and prejudice of the universe and forming a deep bond that transcends the arbitrary meaning of their genetic structure.

>> No.37486013

I imagine it's just ork infiltrators.
Ork infiltrators all the way down, even the wespid.

>> No.37486019

And fuck.

>> No.37486021

Then make up a story about an ork and his harem of sexy alien and human women.


>> No.37486042

They get so deep in, they just think they're tau. Not even the ethereals can figure out why this group of fire warriors use their guns as clubs.

>> No.37486050

Orks reproduce via spores, what's he gonna do with a harem? Shoot at them when he's bored?

>> No.37486055

Work for the good of Glorious Leader Caste.

Also, if North Korea is anything to go by, music. The kinds sponsored by the government, which interestingly includes Country Western.

>> No.37486082

Then how do they breed with Grots?

>> No.37486093


>> No.37486097

Better than Bretonnian Peasants.

>> No.37486100


>> No.37486103

Think for a second pal, its the same way people keep pets or menageries in this case.

>> No.37486106

You say that, but when will you write about Un'grob discovering his love for Ambulls transcends beyond their delicious steaks.

Or the hrud who finds love in the form of a necron warrior, immune to entophy.

"heartwarming interspecies union" with only the ones you find attractive? psh, check your privilege, faggot.

>> No.37486128

I think it's good that with the Tau models you can choose (in your own lore/fluff) who is male or female becuase the armour is covering the entire body thus making it impossible to see it if as a man or a woman. The same thing with the battlesuits

>> No.37486130

I thought Hrud were supposed to be spaceSkaven?

>> No.37486132

they are only sterilized if they are in penal regiments. worlds that willingly join the empire are perfectly normal, worlds that are conquered by force are "reeducated" by converting them into majority tau populations, even then they are not sterilized because that would be counter productive. rebellious populations are sterilized, because they rebelled.

>> No.37486138

Oh hey, ancient retconned fluff

>> No.37486139

Meanwhile every other source says they reproduce via spores with no sex involved. Well, that's 40k for you. Zero consistency in any way

>> No.37486152

>That's a bit inaccurate, since the majority of the time they simply won't acknowledge females exist at all, let alone depict them.

And then when you do make ugly females, they end up woefully undersued because lots of female players don't want to play unattractive characters.

>> No.37486153

They are actually a transdimensional race (outsiders) whose bodies emit entropic energies that ruin all within range.

>> No.37486161

I believe the interbreed part means how their spores mix together.

>> No.37486162

>What are retcons

>> No.37486170

It's a fetish used to describe things.
Like comparing attention whores to furries.

>> No.37486177

Hey guys, why do you always talk about Cuckhammer 40.000?

>> No.37486182

To please our glorious overlord Slaanesh

>> No.37486196

Doesn't it make it a cuckold, too?

>> No.37486204

I hope you're not implying that harems and pets aren't 2 completely different things.

>> No.37486212

Maybe the spores are sex? You don't want some hulking ork boy to say he wants to cover you in his spores?

>> No.37486215

Just because it's not mentioned doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

There could be Ork tribes out there with sexual reproduction.

>> No.37486228

How much of a 'That guy' would I be if I made a whole army of female tau like pic related?

>> No.37486229


>> No.37486251

Fire warrior book with the water caste diplomat La'Kais finds attractive seems to imply that they can.

That said, he also said that they are assigned partners and choice wasn't really factored into it.

>> No.37486259

>Maybe the spores are sex?
Nope. Orks constantly emit spores through their lives and especially when they die. These then take root under ground and orks spring out.

Read Xenology if you're interested.

>> No.37486261

the other option is that ork spores mingle in the air and then germinate, like corals or some fungi.

>> No.37486265

>Is it even possible to get run over in china? Chinese drivers tend to be super careful about not running people over.

Ignoring the reference for a moment, yes, though your second statement is also true due to a simplified vehicular legal code.

Despite the insanity that is average street in a Chinese metropolis most drivers try to avoid running down pedestrians not out of any moral obligation but because they'll lose any settlement case in court. Any type of accident involving pedestrians, bikes, scooters, motorbikes, cars, trucks and or buses are legally resolved using the system of "Whoever was driving the larger vehicle is at fault."
This usually means paying the family of the victim a lot of money even if they intentionally threw themselves into traffic to be hit. Or that's how things were 10 years ago when I was last over. Westerners or those with money are (or were) advised not to drive themselves as it makes you a bigger target for those trying to take advantage of this usual scam.

>> No.37486268

>cuck gets mad someone else points out their favorite faction is a cuck

>> No.37486285


>> No.37486304

yes, you are :)

>> No.37486305

not very, looks like a nice conversion.

although fire-caste are meant to be lithe and muscular, they probably wouldn't be busty. and chest armor is pretty necessary.(except everything they fight ignores their armor anyways)

>> No.37486306

>What do Tau do for fun?
What did soviets do for fun?
There's your answer.

>> No.37486314

>What did soviets do for fun?
Beat the Americans in the Space Race and all other aspects of technology?

I guess it makes sense, what with the Tau being more advanced than the Imperium of Man.

>> No.37486317

I know all this. Just makes it more interesting when people can have Rapey tyranids even though that's a gun and not a phallic object to put your mouth on. Orks need some love too.

>> No.37486324

And if they do run someone over, the drivers in China tend to make sure they are not alive to tell the tale, running them over repeatedly.

>> No.37486331

But they get to ignore everyone's cover with marker lights.

>> No.37486340


>> No.37486345

Here's your reply

>> No.37486363

Are you joking? Soviet empire technology couldn't keep up with western one. They literally stole computer technology from USA to such extent that they used english terms in 'their' assembly language.
The space program was a gamble that paid off, and mainly thanks to an ukrainian engineer they had to recover from gulag because regular soviet engineers could not manage on their own.

>> No.37486388

Here's yours.
When you accept the truth you'll find dealing with reality easier, friend.

>> No.37486389

Don't forget sending political dissenters to Siberia.

>> No.37486390

normal everyday things but with a different culture surrounding luxuries?

and an emphasis on schooling, sports, and (state sponsored) art?

soviet russia was a great place to live if you wernt chechian, ukrainian, polish, or german. Technology boomed, art boomed (in a strange sort of ultra nationalist way), and the average education level of Russia, Georgia, Kazakhstan, and Poland increased massively.

Ukraine was a shitfest backwater ruination hole though, they got fucked by soviet realpolitik. and it wasnt that great a time for non-comunist political thinkers.

>> No.37486403

>couldn't keep up
>won space race


>> No.37486429

Oh great, the Tau are set to fall apart then

>> No.37486430

So great for tau, not that great for not tau?

>> No.37486433


>> No.37486437

>thanks to ukrainian engineer they had to pull out of gulag
amazing, isn't it

>> No.37486442

>soviets succeed thanks to soviet engineers
how amazing

>> No.37486444

Guess we're off the topic of tau's sexual adventures.

>> No.37486451

thats not a fair comparison, they used english because it was the international air-hailing language. they also used french and english for their navy.

>> No.37486459

Yes, thankfully.

>> No.37486460

>My lord, these Gue'Vesa fight quite well, they are also intelligent creatures with a good sense of the Greater Good once it's glory has been reveled to them.
>Then they shall be trained to be a part of the Empire. For the Greater Good.
>They do have a trait which gives them into bouts of irrational behavior... it is called "passion" or "lust" in their tongue.
>Oh? Is it as bad as the feeding frenzy of our Kroot brothers?
>Thankfully not anywhere near as unmanageable as our Kroot bothers'... traits. They require periodic relief of the energies that they have built up. Properly managed, it can be an immense asset on the battlefield.
> How do we manage their, so called, "lust"?
>these beings take a great degree of pleasure in breeding. It's interesting, to be sure, but if we start a breeding program of some of our people to become in tune with their biology then we can greatly manage their kind and at the same time boost their moral.
>Starting an entire breeding program just to boost moral seems costly. Any other benefits?
>the Kroot shapers seem to be especially interested in their genetic material- it apparently possesses interesting variations that can bring great benefits to the Empire in the long run. There is also the small chance of locating rare mutations that are locked up in their so called "gene seeds". The Gue'Vesa themselves have lost the ability to manipulate these, but if they can be located then I am sure our scientists can incorporate these into future generations and bring the Greater Good one step closer to completion.
> Then it is settled. Make it so.

>> No.37486464

not that great for places that were forcibly conquered

>> No.37486466

He's just mad and ignoring that the Americans got left behind and only kept up due to captured fascist scientists.

>> No.37486472

That picture is so Heretical I can't even think of a term for it.

>> No.37486481

so... yes?

>> No.37486488

Except thats not the case, orks explicitly reproduce by unconsciously releasing spores into the environment.

>> No.37486491

I guess that's a thing soviets and americans had in common then.
Doesn't change the fact that Soviet technology was lagging behind western one, and that was one of reasons why soviet union failed so spectacularly.

>> No.37486494

And we're back on! Que nervous guardsman encountering his first xeno lover.

>> No.37486505

So yes, all non tau got it more shit than tau.

>> No.37486509

They were originally just the Skaven in Space seen here.

>> No.37486510

>ITT Taufags
Remember, besides Arty, the Tau are the weakest army.

>> No.37486525

Xeno lover best lover

so forbidden

oh my

>> No.37486533

>Not just a bunch of fucking Russians who are tsundere for the motherland

>> No.37486535

And kroot looked like bugs and necrons were scary terminators with ray guns.

>> No.37486546

that skeletor job with the ray gun looks familiar

>> No.37486560

>oh my
I now need George Taukei in my life.

>> No.37486571

yes, good goyim'vesa

>> No.37486589

Necrons were completely termie rip offs. I remember when they were first introduced with abilities like "I'll be back". There was only the standard warrior and scarabs. The warriors were better-than-space-marine levels of retardedness and the scarabs had an armor reduction ability so that they could at least do something against vehicles.

>> No.37486602

Oh you.

>> No.37486608

He's not good for the breeding program, though.

>> No.37486610

No, they had the flying attack bikes too soon after they were revealed and the leader units.

>> No.37486617

/pol/ is back and better than ever

And guess what? We are coming to /tg/..

>> No.37486619

They still eat armor away. Pretty damn annoying too, but watching kans and scarabs slap each other is funny.

>> No.37486622

Originally started with /v/ using it in context to mock Anthony Burch

Then /tv/ used it in a stretched context to mock the AVGN

Then /pol/ used it in context to mock moot

Then it just got repeated again and again by /tv/ and /pol/ as a catch all "he said something I didn't like" rebuttal until it lost all meaning.

>> No.37486630

/pol/ is the modern furfag.

Attention whores forcing themselves into everything.

>> No.37486648

Perhaps, but it shows that Russians were either unable to create their own computer systems from ground up, or that they were so far behind that they found it more efficient to merely replicate western tech instead of even trying to develop their own.

>> No.37486677

Kaleesh mods?

Not at all, if you are not an asshole in your strategies.

>> No.37486706

The guy hates America. With a such a heavy bias, you'll never convince him.

>> No.37486781

i dont hate america, i just love the USSRs history, and saying they were backwards and not a world power is disingenuous.

modern russia though, fuck that.

>> No.37486845

I reason that SoB are chosen for sheer toughness and brutality among the sister orders, so they are going to be considerably more manly than most females. Couple it with the constant scars from war, intense training and occasional religious mutilation, finding a 10/10 sister is gona be hard.

And Citing it as GWs inability to sculpt females would be a effort in stupidity, because when they want to, they totally can: old Daemonettes, WHF Elves, Vampires, Repentia, Pentience engine

It's a conscious choice to make them man

>> No.37486848


It always irks me when people portray the Tau as somehow devoid of sensation or animal instinct. Remember that before the Ethereals showed up, the Tau were embroiled in species-wide infighting that would've made the both World Wars look like shouting matches between drunk strangers. You can see in a lot of Tau fluff, how even Tau themselves chafe under the Ethereals' all-encompassing social engineering. This isn't a part of themselves that they're blissfully unaware of, but something that are very aware of and constantly fear, calling it the Terror, calling it Mont'au

Though they've become very good at suppressing it and denying it, inside every Tau is a creature of great wrath, caprice, and passion.

And all it takes to unleash the fiery carnal urges within a demure and proper Water Caste diplomat is the savage lust of her wild man gue'la lover.

>> No.37486849

You don't need to be most technologically advanced entity to be a world power. And it was not too far behind.
However the lag was still big enough, and coupled with generally inefficient economy resulting from its authoritarian regime, to result in their ultimate failure.

If it's of any consolation to you, they did manage to get the first probe and first man in space, along with some other fairly impressive achievements like landing probes on Venus.

>> No.37486863


>> No.37486901

S&M. An Ork getting flogged, beaten, whipped, or otherwise harmed spreads spores, which is the Ork equivalent of reproduction. Therefore, to an Ork, a brutal session with a variety of lovely and eager dominatrixes would be our equivalent of a harem.

>> No.37486929

>You will never live to fug aliens
>you will never oil her blue skin
>You will never learn her language and explore her planet

>> No.37486946

Or maybe an ogryn.

>> No.37486967

>Why do you suppose Sisters of Battle are all man-jawed drag queens?

Nobody would buy them, if they were modeled after real female Soldiers.

This is just the standard, it gets worse.

>> No.37486993

>top left

What the fuck.

>> No.37486997

Not every women has to look good anon

>> No.37487007

Wow, I can see that they really only joined because of lesbian sex or they are too fugly for men outside military

>> No.37487015

i dunno, some of those in that picture are kinda hot

>> No.37487041

>> No.37487047

bottom middle right, bottom middle left, and bottom left are all QTs

>> No.37487063

>Therefore, to an Ork, a brutal session with a variety of lovely and eager dominatrixes would be our equivalent of a harem.
Hahahahhaha, no. Orks thrive on being the biggest, meanest, toughest and most dominant. Fighting and winning essentially causes puberty in them which makes them even bigger and tougher. Submitting and being beaten stops that process

An ork that engages in S&M goes against everything that Orks are

>> No.37487072

>this is the reason why they approved the breeding program in the first place

Wow this breeding program is so successful! So many volunteers!

>> No.37487073

Girl looks like a linebacker. Man, ever get punched by a girl like that? As good as most guys that've hit me.

>> No.37487079

needs a blanket and a hug.
And someone who pets her head and reassures her that everything is gonna be alright in this actually cuckoldtastic galaxy.

>> No.37487081

Eh, she's an enlisted soldier and obviously fresh out of boot. I'd be surprised if she didn't have kind of a GI Jane thing going on.

>> No.37487090

>Tau tanning in the sun
Would Tau even tan?
Do they turn a darker shade of blue?
What color do they turn if they get too much sun?
Whats their courtship ritual like?
Does it vary across castes?
Whats the meaning of Cicada 3301?

>> No.37487098

I thought left was male and right was female?

>> No.37487103

which is why it's so forbidden. So lewd....

>> No.37487112

Tau Males have an I on their forehead, females have Y

>> No.37487123

In all fairness, its tough to look good in that armor when you are weary and resting against a dirty wall.

>> No.37487127

>Would Tau even tan?


>Do they turn a darker shade of blue?

Dark shade of bluish grey. Tau from sunny worlds like T'au have this shade.

>What color do they turn if they get too much sun?


>Whats their courtship ritual like?

They are assigned a mate by the government and then get married.

>Does it vary across castes?


>> No.37487131

All the ork sees is target practice or a slave for the munitions factories

>> No.37487138

dem lips. And this >>37487079

>> No.37487141

If the other nobs found out, he might get challenged.

>> No.37487190

But whats the meaning of Cicada 3301?

>> No.37487201

No idea.

>> No.37487219


Is it wrong that I really want pick up the one in the bottom right and juggle her?


That's just what most women without makeup look like anon.

>> No.37487231

>They are assigned a mate by the government and then get married
So no non-marital flings? Is it too much to ask for tau girls? Preferably in pile form?

>> No.37487240

So what? There are entire group of Orks doing un-Orky things, like sneaking around as Kommandos, regimenting themselves with a rocket strapped to their back, or buying loadza dakka with their extra teef and not even carrying axes.

If there's anything more Orky it would be the "fook you, I'll do wot I want" attitude.

>> No.37487281

>That's just what most women without makeup look like anon.
Where the fuck do you live?
I want to avoid it if at all possible.

>> No.37487293

>That's just what most women without makeup look like anon.

>> No.37487320

Government sanctioned "comfort cadets".

Under the Department of Morale.

>> No.37487328

All of which are related to war and killing which is why it's tolerated

>> No.37487331

Well he better be a dead killy warboss or another one might show up to show him how to treat his harem. With sexual violence.

>> No.37487333

Well I wouldn't call them that, but I'd imagine because they wanted them to look more imposing rather than (kawaii desu chan weaboo vomit cute blob)

>> No.37487335

>That's just what most unattractive women look like anon.

>> No.37487350

>That's just what most women without makeup look like anon.
I'm going to skip making the obvious joke and just say you're wrong

>> No.37487351

dont forget the Orks that don't even follow Gork or Mork.

>> No.37487367

>That's just what most women without makeup look like anon.
Does anyone actually believe this? Keep drinking that kool-aid anon, give the cosmetic companies your money.

>> No.37487371

Because that's how western women looks.

>> No.37487378

>you will never share your combat burrito with a taugirl

>> No.37487384

Trips speaks the truth! Forward sisters!

>> No.37487424

Is this a battle dyke thread now?

>> No.37487443

Top kek.

>> No.37487454

Sure, why not

>> No.37487459 [SPOILER] 

>Gue'vesa, you have been assigned as a comfort cadet, this is your assigned battle partner for this rotation.

>> No.37487468


oh sorry, just ignore my raised voice, I am no Astartes at all, nope, just a heretic.

>> No.37487492

>> No.37487498

>Battle dykes
>Someone still thinks SoBs have to swear chastity
>Someone still thinks it would be a bad thing if they cuddle up together when not being fire spewing engines of death and badassery

>> No.37487504

>So happy to meet you, Gue'vesa-kun! Did you volunteer for the Comfort Cadet program too?

>> No.37487506

Oh good thing I have two mORE HNNNNNNNGHHHH!
HELP ME! CALL THE AMBULANCEee................

>> No.37487510


Thats my point, Sisters of Battle are suppose to look imposing and being able to kick alien asses.

Sadly the majority of real female soldiers today, don't look like that, so artist of fantasy and sci fi have to invent woman that do.

>> No.37487515

>sneaking is un-orky



>Tau Government Mate Selection largely involves putting a load of tau girls into one of those coin grabber machines and the ethereals take turns trying to pick them out with a joystick operated grabber for the next candidate.

happy now?

>> No.37487522


Guardsmen cuddle puddles when?

>> No.37487531

>> No.37487535


>> No.37487538

>I seem to meet a lot of Gue'vesas on this program. They're all so very interesting and cute!

>> No.37487560 [SPOILER] 

>Guardsman X SoB

>> No.37487572

>Kommandos are looked down upon by other Orks
>only tolerated because they bring in the results

Cunning is Orky, not sneaking.

>> No.37487588

>> No.37487595

I wonder if commissars ever try to catch their guardsmen lusting for xenos.

>> No.37487600

>Nervous guardsman
Those words don't go together

>> No.37487604

Blood Axes copy humans in strategy. Maybe they copied the need to have harems of strange creatures with jiggly chests and bottoms?

>> No.37487608

>even in death I serve the Emperor

You give up so easily. Pathetic.

>> No.37487634

Why not both?

>> No.37487644

People don't have fun in 40k.

>> No.37487648


>> No.37487655

Go to bed grandpa

>> No.37487694

I'm ok with this.

>> No.37487695

Look man, if you want to jerk off just do it. There really is no need to come up with in-fluff explanations

>> No.37487710

why even use women in combat? they suffer penalties to strength, constitution and intelligence.

just use them to breed more guardsmen

>> No.37487727

Why is James covering in that corner?
Holy shit!, he looks totally beat up.
He looks like he has seen oblivion.
Buddy, are you alrigh-

> Nemaz, leave that poor sod be, he had enough for now.

Commissar Adolphus what happened to him_
He looks like he died inside.

> heard he was handcuffed by a Sororitas and was dragged into the field used as a meatshield and mace.
> Bunch of crazy nuns if you ask me, he would have been better off dead.

Excuse me Commissar, but are these pills?

> When I was in another regiment, I survived and saw many friends die under Tyranids
> These pills are what are helping me to get my grip together.
> Maybe, maybe it will help him as much as it helps me.

>> No.37487729

Oh boy, here we go

>> No.37487731

>There really is no need to come up with in-fluff explanations


>> No.37487736

Because (ethical issues and inaccuracies in your argument aside) the Imperium already has too many people goddamn

>> No.37487767

Back in my day I used to see the glory of the Emperor as we marched in formation to conquer the worlds that you inhabit and flourish in.

And to think... the children of the Emperor would give up so easily in this day an age...

It is sad.....

>> No.37487768

The Ecclesiarchy is forbidden by decree from raising armies but the letter of the law is, "men at arms." As battle sisters are women, it permits the church to skirt that particular restriction.

>> No.37487784

This guy would be best friends with Bjorn.

>> No.37487793

Both of these are surprisingly good arguments
Well done /tg/, I was hoping for knee jerk reactions that derailed the thread

>> No.37487816

In that case just gonna post more Tau X Imperium stuff

>> No.37487825

What I never liked in 40k is that 90% of the lore is just the propaganda line for whatever faction's codex it is.
>No Grey Knight has ever fallen to chaos
>No SoB has ever fallen to Chaos
>No Tau has ever gone against the greater good (except Farsight)
>No imperial citizen would ever knowingly associate with xenos
In most sci-fi series, they leave room for gray areas on the fringes of societies, but 40k just handwaves everyone into being more robotic than the average necron. Of course, in the game we never see these place as we're always playing the loyal armies of whatever faction we have, but tidbits of lore here and these imply such people and place exist even in 40k. There are pirates and mercenaries so there must be places such people are accepted, on the fringes or just outside of imperium space. If the Space Marines ever make so much as a pit stop there the whole place is bound to get purged, but they must exist.

I'm sure there are desolate, sparsely populated places in the tau empire, with only a few representatives from each caste and only a few Gue'la. The etherals only bother to stop by ever few months at such a tiny little outpost, and the locals have long since lost their imperial way of life. The handful of tau mingle with the handful of humans, and maybe some things happen that wouldn't happen if they were living on T'au, or on a warship, or even if the resident ethereal wasn't so lazy. The earth caste mechanics take on some human apprentices, some water caste merchant develops a fetish for pink skin, and a fire caste police officer gets a human partner (and together they fight crime). At least until Orks burn the whole planet to the ground.

>> No.37487829

>ethical issues and inaccuracies in your argument aside
here's your reply

>> No.37487839

Funny you should mention him. We used to be battle brothers at the height of the Emperor's glory.

How is he holding up these days? I hear that he still possesses the burning passion for the Emperor and mankind's ascendancy. In death he still serves, and serves well.....

>> No.37487842

Pic related.
Plastic, and really nice.

>> No.37487848


>> No.37487877

He mostly just talks about how he hates Russ and his dreams of sister of battle. I believe they were twins.

>> No.37487893


Slaaneshi cultists kidnapped a bunch of people and species and sacrificed them. However they did not die but were transported to the palace of the Prince of Pleasure. There they were twisted and mutated. Orks grew dicks, the Tau became bearable to look at.... Then their minds were rewired. The ork believed his new dick was a weapon a sought to slay as many as he could with it (with gory results). The Tau woman sought to advance the greater good through peace and appease the ork. Every time she failed and would be ripped apart and yet every morning she arose renewed and the Ork remained just as insatiable. He resolved never to stop until he kills her once and for all.

Warp fuckery can be used to explain whatever you want
I hate you

>> No.37487894

>What I never liked in 40k is that 90% of the lore is just trying to get you to buy that faction's merchandise

And it works too, so fork over the cash you dirty neckbear.

>> No.37487912

Look out for that weapon skill!

>> No.37487926

>walked out of high school
>was given fancy tech, competent commanders and a growing empire
>fucked everything up with the heresy
Fucking Crusade Boomers

>> No.37487939

This post is what a space poof looks like.

Point at it. Point at it and laugh.

Then despair, for this is the fate of our sons; men in tin uniforms with guns hardly more impressive than what we have now, masturbating to pictures of women so skinny and pale, they'd make an Elf look like a man.
Then turning down actual Elf maidens because of an imagined purity of blood that was never there.

Well I say, as the ancestor to most of Cadia, your mothers were Ogres, Halflings, and Dwarfs! They had the strength to take mein thrusts and return them in the counterthrust in equal measure, and hips that kept me warmer than any whore in Altdorf ever did!

>> No.37487963

You're busted buddy, I'm a Commissar!

>> No.37487968

Keep paying for face putty pleb.

>> No.37487971

Chaos Internet Defense Force pls go and stay go

>> No.37487978

Hey look, a Skaven!

>> No.37488006

Fantasy USED to be better.

Now every book is basically "here's your history, and BWAHAHA Chaos wins".

>> No.37488272

>wasn't that the entire reason mass effect never showed female salarians, Turian, elcor, hanar, etc
because the creators were like
>d-do we give them b-boobs?

>> No.37488284

You do know that there is no solid lore to 40k right?
You can bullshit right up till the emperors golden toilet, the four retards behind the seat, the way shit went down (in general, I don't think emps have done his thing yet) and GW's right to the franchise. All other than that is up to you to bullshit about, the god emperor reborn as a woman: Go right ahead. That tau and human fuckfuckery: Yeperooni. Orks with huge dongs, all two foot long and all with the head of a golden gretchin:Well it's your money I suppose....

Because it all fall onto the big, lovable golden rule of: The universe is a big place, anything can happen.

>> No.37488357

Yeah, except most people follow the same rule for lore as they do their rules: If it's not in the codex or the BRB, it doesn't exist.

>> No.37488359

>d-do we give them b-boobs?

It's all about dem hips mang

>> No.37488396

I do rather like how Bioware did their sexual dimorphism. Krogan and Durian were done rather well.

Still want to cockslap them for the Quarian design.

>> No.37488423

How silly.

>> No.37488521

Actually it's usually more along the lines of it simply being too much extra work; for non-player races, you're possibly doubling the workload. Which is why it's easier to go for mono-gendered cultures as a cop-out method to try to balance out gender representation.

SJW paranoia aside, it's really just laziness.

>> No.37488552

Now this is better xenos design.

I don't get why most fanart of female Tau make them look like some Asian idol when really they look more like Shadowsun: someone's aunt who is 60 but pretends to be 40.

>> No.37488581

You should understand.

>> No.37488655

> Durian were done rather well.

>> No.37488661

There was a Tali design was terribad

There was a fan design rattling around here somewhere that gave them mandibles similar to the turians due to their similar DNA structure

>> No.37488691

Which is why I refer to
And say THAT was a better design. Stick to the original alien design but changes something to make it female, instead of just slapping boobs and a human face on it. Quarians was stupid and a major letdown.

>> No.37488747

>all of these people harping on about inter-caste sex being verboten
>find "Farsight Enclave": no matches
You had 1 job, /tg/.

>> No.37488768

Found it, there's a better one floating around on my computer but I can't seem to find it

>> No.37488786

Attend the next meeting of their local chapter of their caste to discuss what shall be done tomorrow for the Greater Good

>> No.37488797

this what you are looking for?

>> No.37488825

I would blame autocorrect, but I like this result too much.

>> No.37488888

A bit funky but certainly closer to what I was expecting since they do share similar problems with food like the Turians.

>> No.37488921

This is good, but literally anything is better than the cop out cock slap EA gave us

>> No.37488941

This would have been neat.
Though honestly ANYTHING would have been better than "they're basically just humans".
They didn't even have monochrome eues or bioluminescent blood or.. anything. They're just spacd elves. I can't get my xenophile boner up on mere elves.

>> No.37488980

it's always best to imagine that ME3 and most of ME2 didn't happen

>> No.37488992

Bioware is kind of all round terrible at endings isn't it?

>> No.37489008

>It looks too human, I can't get aroused from it
I'm proud of you /tg/

>> No.37489047

Not so much endings as conclusions. When they make an ending as a cliffhanger they do a decent job. But when it comes time to wrap up the story, maybe they should stick to one writer instead of firing him and bringing some new person to redo the whole thing.

>> No.37489078

ME2 was good and ME3 was great with the exception of the Tali picture and last 15 minutes

I prefer indoctrination theory, also Bioware said that their original plot was that mass effect technology accelerated star age cycles (Hinted at in ME2 Tali's mission) and that the Reapers were in fact saving the galaxy from destruction and saving the collective consciousness of all sentient creatures who made it to their tech level.

In the original plot, Reapers were the eventual good guys.

>> No.37489085

I like ME2 better than the other two. ME1 is mostly just boring and ME3 is mostly just lame.

ME2 hits a sweet spot with just traveling around space and meeting strange people that the other two just don't achieve.

>> No.37489098

...well, if you cocktease me with xeno dickings and bring out an elf, yeah.
I was also alluding to a nonsexual love for really alien aliens. And also sexual love.

>> No.37489140

Yeah you can tell ME3 was a rushjob.

>ME2 builds up stars dying faster than normal
>Potential sidequest with Tali to decide if her home was worth reclaiming if the suns were dying out?

By ME3 that was all totally forgotten and replaced with...well you saw. And Tali was a disappointment. The least they could have done was make an in game render of her face instead of just a shopped photo.

>> No.37489157

ME2 had fantastic character moments, but the story was a complete pile of crap.

>> No.37489219

ME2 really suffered from completely throwing out any idea of immersion the original had.

I mean, they segmented everything into linear combat zones with literal score screens at the end. And every character immediately fell into the formula of one recruitment mission, one loyalty mission, and maybe you'd get an argument with another character to resolve. Outside of those, they barely existed.

>> No.37489318

>ME3 was great with the exception of the Tali picture and last 15 minutes

no, anon, Tuchanka and the weapon mechanics were the only great parts.
Some character moments were good, but it was a terrible mess in all other aspects.
>cerberus being retconned again
>Illusive man being turned into a moustache twirling villain
>Kai "nothin' personnel... kid" Leng
>Asari had secret Prothean tech all along and never openly used it despite predating the other council races by centuries, if not milennia
>the crucible, AKA the greatest and most inexplicable Deus Ex Machina the world has ever seen
>most of the characters of the previous games being marginalised to glorified cameos (and given that ME2 did a great job on them, it was especially painful for them)
>moving the citadel to earth for no reason
>Reapers being degraded further into saturda morning cartoon villains, and still further from the glory of Sovereign
>having a musical score that was a downgrade in every way from the previous 2 (1 especially blows it out of the water)
>fetch quests out the ass, some of which feature descriptions vastly more interesting than anything we saw in the main story (Walking elcor weapon platforms, Krogan riding fucking Dinosaurs)
>turning Udina into a villain for no reason other than to pander to the lowest common denominator
>cerberus summoning a galaxy threatening army from the ether
>rachni choice from ME1 meaning absolutely fuck all
>choices in general meaning almost fuck all (Tuchanka and Rannoch were the only ones that were significantly affected, as I recall)

>> No.37489323

>Someone still thinks SoBs have to swear chastity
>Someone still thinks it would be a bad thing if they cuddle up together when not being fire spewing engines of death and badassery
Indeed, the nerve...

>All other than that is up to you to bullshit about, the god emperor reborn as a woman: Go right ahead. That tau and human fuckfuckery: Yeperoon
Yes, espcecially when we could have a Femperor...

>> No.37489326


>> No.37489436

I like Barblarga's design.

>> No.37489516

I believe we have discussed this before.

>More feminine imagery in Imperium art
>Female space marines (Indistinguishable from male)
>Brothers of Battle (BoBs) rather than sisters of battle, and they would all wear armor like pic related with bigger codpieces

>> No.37489536

Sorry, wrong pic, BoBs would wear armor like this with bigger, more defined codpieces

>> No.37489576

You keep claiming Female Space Marines wouldn't look anything different than male ones, and we keep disagreeing...

>> No.37489612

a fucking stock photo even

>> No.37489668

Actually that makes sense

>> No.37489739

>Army of 10,000 screaming men in muscle armor and giant flaming codpieces come running over the hill.

>> No.37489753

Well she is one of the Lost Primarchs after all...

>> No.37489792

Samus for strongest Primarch?

>> No.37489808

Again, see >>37489753

>> No.37489811

...I'm just going to say it

Is it weird that I'd MASSIVELY PREFER that kind of face for Tali and thus Quarians as a whole instead of what we got?

I don't know... maybe I just have an enjoyment out of seeing Semi-Horrific aliens still acting cute or at least like people. I mean it would make more sense than some...weird almost human

I liked District 9 so take that with a grain of salt

>> No.37489877

>Standard Brother of Battle armor

>> No.37489890

But would you fook a prawn?

>> No.37489941


>> No.37489944

I... I don't know HOW to fook a prawn to be honest

>> No.37489998

On a semi related note, is ME3 worth playing? I played 1 and 2 but after hearing all the terrible things about 3 I didn't even bother getting it...

>> No.37490013

Pretty sure they lay their eggs via an ovipositer and you then deposit your sperm on top.

>> No.37490016

step 1, find a hole/protrusion
step 2, insert protrusion into hole
step 3, worry about biological compatibility later

>> No.37490045

ME3 has the best gameplay out of all of them by far
The story is good until the last 15 minutes.

>> No.37490046

Kinda like this.

>> No.37490061

Best Samus art.

Fuck Zero Suit Harlet.

>> No.37490089

Let's just say 'business as usual'

>> No.37490094

I have those bits. The heads are too small, IMO.

>> No.37490097

>They blur out the prawn's face

>> No.37490144

Also its "harlot" and there's nothing wrong if she picks up some beefcake while she's out.

>> No.37490216

The heads are only slightly too small for the torsos. They just look small compared to the male heads GW makes.

>> No.37490218

Its bioware, a good story and romance side missions are expected

>> No.37490226

All I know is if I fuck the unseen alien on personality, and the grand reveal of what she looks like is drawn out for two games and I wasn't fooking a prawn, I feel like I've been retroactively cockslapped.
Hell, what does a male Shepard even fuck if they want an actual alien? All they got are humans and asari.

>> No.37490249

Damned cheap now. Plus you get a lil' multiplayer arena thing.

>> No.37490275

Couldn't you gay with Garrus?

>> No.37490299

No Steam, no dice.

>> No.37490326

I'd fuck a Hanar

Not even for the tentacles

They seem cuddly despite all their formality

>> No.37490358

Pretend the last 15 minutes didn't happen and you can find some enjoyment in the game. The multiplayer is fun for a spell.

>> No.37490400


>> No.37490456

That's okay. I didn't care about the main story at all and liked the fact that it took a backseat. I'm more annoyed that ME3 pretty much wasted the most of the ME2 cast.

>> No.37490516

If that's him wrestling, I want next.

>> No.37490527


>> No.37490573

Samus always dressed skimpy.

>> No.37490621

Just shuttle guy and Kaidan. Garrus is evidently straight.

So yeah, the most alien alien a maleShep can bang is Liara.

>> No.37490644

Personally, I've always been let down by the fact that you can even fuck Tali at all in the first place.

I was fine with a romance, but the whole design concept of her species should have made physical sex impossible. They didn't wear environment suits just because it was cool, they did it because they were supposed to mean something--their isolation from everyone else in the galaxy on a physical level was supposed to mirror their isolation from the galaxy on a social and cultural level, but they changed all that, they weakened the whole motif they had going on by making it so that they just get a nasty flu from outside contact, instead of cold absolution of having it kill them without exception. And they betrayed that design concept all for pandering.

That romance plot for Tali that never was could have been tragic and heartbreaking, in the way that there would always be this distance between Shepard and Tali that they could never cross, but it could also have been touching how they stood together despite that distance, it could have made the final reveal that much more meaningful, it could have been unique in the way that it defied the idea of sex as the endgame of a relationship, and for that, maybe even a bit fucking brave. But that didn't happen, because that would have to have been written by Bioware, and Bioware doesn't do brave.

>> No.37490681

A legit move in turkish oil wrestling is sticking your hand and arm down your opponents pants to get a better grip and toss him to the ground It just sounds lewder and lewder the longer I type.

>> No.37490752

Knowing that my seed was poison to her just made it all the hotter.

>> No.37490757

prawns are hermaphrodites though.

>> No.37491701

I don't care.

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