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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.34579823 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

It is the year 22XX and Deniable Assets Quest has finally finished it’s hiatus.

Humanity is ruled by ultra-Corporations, blah blah blah cyberpunk shit, they own planets, Corporate Governments rule everything. In this corporate future dystopia it’s your job to get into a drop pod and fuck shit up for money... when you’re not busy interacting with shittily written waifus or sperging out over personal finances.

This thread is meant to get people back on track with the DAQ plot so we can get back into the swing of things. I’ll be dumping plot relevant reminders so people can catch up and will be fielding questions if you people feel like I’ve missed something important. Hopefully once all of that is done with we can pick up where we left off.

QM’s Twitter:

DAQ Master Pastebin with archive links, pastebins, and other miscellania:

>> No.34579849

Basic question I know, but it’s been a while and I don’t hold you personally responsible to remember all the nitty gritty details of some amatuer QM’s main character. You are playing as Ivan Parkas Kostov, a quarter Russian merc of otherwise unspecified descent. Your name reeks of misery and potatoes.

Your combat specialty is Melee work with your beloved Tomahawk-tan. You are also nominally skilled with handguns - both pistols and SMGs - assault rifles, and shotguns to a limited extent. Your non-combat proficiency is “tech” which is basically mechanical shit, repairing armor, equipment, vehicles, and other related doodads. Tech also rolls over to vehicle operation and anti-armor combat skills. You also have something called Grit Mode, which is a berserker state you have a chance of entering if significantly injured.

Occasionally pear shaped Aliums will contact you in your sleep.

You have recently gotten out of debt, which was a big deal for a lot of players.

Personal Details
>Jovial personality, honest with people, generally supportive of your friends
>Have some difficulty admitting you’re wrong, somewhat oblivious
>You were born on one of NepCol’s planetary holdings, where you worked as a combat engineer
>You have a mother and father, both are alive and well although you are distant from both of them

>> No.34579875

>Elda Acerbi
She’s like this italian sniper chick who seems bipolar as fuck but that’s mostly because I’m bad at writing her. Alternates between liking you and being a bit of a bitch. She’s secretive about her past, and there’s been some speculation among players that she has a connection to the SPEHSS MAFIA.

>Darius Somethingorother
He’s one of the most senior mercs and generally acts as a father figure towards the younger mercs. Highly skilled at just about everything, he often goes on mentoring drops with rookies. He also likes pranking rookies too, and at one point convinced you that you were going to be fired.

>Svenja Weiss
Your HR advisor/representative. She hooks you up with missions and job benefits and generally takes care of all the paperwork shit that mercing in the corprofuture entails. She’s rather pacifistic and probably has some moral qualms with your work, especially if you’re the sort to get your hands dirty. Yes, you’ve banged. No, there’s no pastebinned smut.

>Niels Becker
A merc with far more skill at hacking and programming than the bloodier side of his work. Although generally hapless in the field, his technical skills and planning ability are invaluable. He spearheaded Operation Capital Shock, which will in the long term make you very rich. A skilled cook, he’s a friendly sort if a teeny tiny bit judgmental.

Impulsive, aggressive, supremely skilled, hypersexual, and lacking a sense of self preservation, StrikeOut’s decision to give her a heavy machine gun was either a stroke of brilliance or the result of a stroke. Time would reveal it was more the former. A freewheeling merc who will protect her comrades of the moment at the risk of her own life. Yes, she’s banged you. Yes there is a pastebin of it. No, I don’t have the link.

>> No.34579898

>Markos Ruiz
Perpetually douchey, cocky, and obnoxious, Markos is a fratboy given medical credentials and a gun. Well, not the medical credentials bit. He was kicked out just before getting his MD for possessing illicit substances. Luckily for him, StrikeOut cares more about skills than diplomas and he landed a job a merc.

>Simge Atlar
Another lady sniper. You mostly have interacted with her “Vix” persona on Merc Idol Reality TV, where she plays a disturbed mental patient. Extremely friendly and cheerful.

>The Millenium Man
The mysterious head of StrikeOut. No mercs aside from the Tin Man have ever seen him in the flesh, he mostly interacts with the outside world through a remotely controlled android. There are legends about him, but few known facts. Those that did know him don’t often speak about him.

>Sotiris Vokos
The SEO (Supreme Executive Officer) of NeoLogos, and a close friend of the Millenium Man. He does make personal appearances from time to time, although you’ve never personally spoken to him.

The Pear Shaped Alium you exclusively interact with. It’s attempts to communicate with you are hampered somewhat by the fact that it’s a goddamn alien. Seems to have something important to say but we’re not sure what yet. Otherwise seems well meaning if a bit odd. Opposed to The-One-Which-Consumes (might be wrong on that).


>The Armorer
Has a name, I forgot it. Ex-merc and very bloody minded.

>> No.34579906


Dude, it's fucking great to see you again.

>> No.34579912


>> No.34579951


>> No.34579954

>Clayton Burnside
SPEHSS AUSSIE. Skilled at squad leadership and has dropped with you several times in the past. Has a family on New New South Wales where he uses asteroid mining det cores to go blast fishing. Has an openly hostile attitude to the natural world and a stencilled Koala on his shoulder as an icon.

Died ;_;

>Tsukino Noriko
A quiet and polite girl who is prone to blushing and chopping people up with her SPEHSS KATANA. Your fellow CQC specialist in this batch of rookies, she’s more focussed on stealth as compared to your louder approach. Niels has waifued her hard.

>Himawari Force
Three Japanese Merc-Idols you defeated and then recruited. One of them has big boobies, which has made her a favorite of both in quest characters and some of my readers.

>Dr. Tran
Apparently shares his name with a youtube cartoon character. Also died ;_;

>> No.34579963

Dear Fall Guy, I feel like my wielder recently lost all interest in me. He doesn't even look at me anymore, he just spend all day in that big suit of mecha armor.

-A concerned tomahawk

>> No.34579965

Welcome back Fall!

>> No.34579998

The Merc company you work for. It has close ties to NeoLogos Inc. Although not officially a subsidiary of NeoLogos, everyone knows where it’s loyalties lie. Based on the Brick, an asteroid in the Hyperion System, which NeoLogos owns. I tried to design a logo for StrikeOut, but it looked like shit so I’m opening that particular activity up to my players, should they be interested.

One of the Biggest Ultra-Corps, owns almost all of the the Hyperion System. Based on the planet Atlas, an Earth-like planet and one of the primo colony worlds. Primarily focussed on neuroware and biological to cybernetic interfaces.

>Quantum Electro-Dynamics Incorporated
The Corp that owns Earth and large swathes of the the Sol System. Does a lot of higher physics work, runs the wormhole data net that connects almost all human worlds onto one galaxy spanning internet. Sole manufacturer of Ship borne wormhole generators, which allow ships to travel interstellar distances in a timely manner, as well as some other technological marvels

What it says on the tin. The energy required to maintain a wormhole increases based on the size of the wormhole, the number of ambient gravitons, and several other factors. This basically means that we can have small wormholes constantly open on all planets to allow the transfer of data between worlds, but anything material must be transported by spaceship.

>Limited Liability Solutions
Basically a front organization for a variety of criminal groups. Prone to infighting, definitely not a unified front. You have dropped against them at least once now.

>> No.34580058

Hey everybody, great to be back. Unfortunately I'm a lazy bastard and what I've jsut dumped is all I had prepared prior to starting up the thread. I'll be working on a mission summary for you guys, so feel free to ask for more info while I write that up.

You're a beautiful tomahawk who don't need no merc.

>> No.34580110

>Unfortunately I'm a lazy bastard and what I've jsut dumped is all I had prepared prior to starting up the thread. I'll be working on a mission summary for you guys, so feel free to ask for more info while I write that up.
Who cares about missions? How are the Himawari Force's tits right now?

>> No.34580146

fantastic question anon

I hope we get involved in personally training them very soon with some intense training courses

>> No.34580163

The manage to be large yet also perky.

>> No.34580184

Be honest, did we train them already in CQC?

If you know what I mean.

I really mean combat.

>> No.34580201

No, not yet. Quest stopped just before you landed on Atlas.

>> No.34580209

no anon, sadly we haven't had the chance and Valkyrie beat us to spending some time with thundertits

which we are going to rectify soon

>> No.34580250

Is this the quest thing where in one episode we crashed a helicopter in a bulding for some reason or another and can't remember more of it?

>> No.34580283

uhh wut

>> No.34580299

Then my vote would go to becoming a teacher on Atlas and train the thunder tits force.

Also, buy a tweed blazer with elbow pads of another color.

>> No.34580304

I don't know.
Might be confusing this with a series of one shots or something

>> No.34580330

>Operation Ordinary Rendition
Your first drop, and one of your more successful ones. You got bumped up a pay grade for your performance and kidnapped some Japanese scientists.

>Operation Shattered Moon
Another resounding success, you managed to save dozens of asteroid miners held hostage by the nefarious Limited Liability Solutions, a front organization for organized crime on Earth. You also managed to kill the legendary Jamaican Giant Dreads with the aid of a fellow rookie, Tsukino Noriko.

>Operation Bitter Prophet
A deeply unsettling mission, and your first brush with failure. Sent down to investigate a gene therapy clinic that had gone silent, your squad found a horrific scene of slaughter. The staff dead and the patients horribly mutated, the mission cost you many nights of sleep and an arm. Your squad decided to retreat before they could discover how the clinic came to such a grim fate.

>Operation Idol Bashers
Suggested by your well intentioned HR Advisor, Svenja Weiss, this drop was a light and easy battle against the theatric, but ultimately ineffectual, merc-idols of the SpaceHeart*Love Mil-Pop TV show. You have yet to receive your earnings for the mission, but you managed to snag three defeated merc-idols, the Himawari Force, for Basic Training as StrikeOut mercs.

>> No.34580338

Anon, when we recruited them, we said we'd give them some private tuition and personally instruct them in a CQC course, so we're already scheduled to help train them.

In more ways than one

>> No.34580356

>Operation Capital Shock
A mission proposed by Niels as an opportunity to hack into a local stock exchange to play the market. The mission was a huge and honestly unexpected, success, no one died or was seriously mangled, the hack was successful, you filled all of the contractor’s mission objectives, and you came out of it with a BART (Bipedal Armored Response Tank) to call your own.

>Operation Sour Oracle
A continuation of the Bitter Prophet line of missions, you’re job was to capture the scientist you believe was responsible for the events of Bitter Prophet. You were successful in that regard and managed to ship Killdozer-sempai with Forklift-chan in the process. Although you have yet to hear the results of the interrogation/investigation you have high hopes for a successful resolution.

>> No.34580445

So, are we mostly just focused on the Himawari Force right now? If so I'll dump a few text posts so we can orient ourselves and then get writing. Again, if you have any questions involving the Quest, please feel free to ask.

>> No.34580463

yes, We want thundertits.

>> No.34580488

No need to rush into things FG, I'm just glad you're back, I can wait for Himewari Force

>> No.34580491

>managed to ship Killdozer-sempai with Forklift-chan in the process.
You mean they're with us on the ship?

>> No.34580502

Ship more in the fandom-y sense of the word.

>> No.34580507

They would be a great way to get back into things. Relevant and lighthearted.

>> No.34580512

ah, okay then.

>> No.34580521

no anon, they are on their honeymoon

I've no idea what you've planned for this thread but I don't mind

>> No.34580530

He means to tell they are joined in their eternal rest.

>> No.34580578

Or maybe they have been seized and then sold to a better warehouse that will accomodate their love.

>> No.34580732

DAQ is back! fuck yeah!
poor tomahawk-chan, we love you really.
yeah, Himawari force are funny

>> No.34580830

>no, there's no pastebinned smut.

fukkin dropped, Fallguy! I HAD HIGH HOPES FOR YOU!

Good to see you back man, you've been sorely missed.

>> No.34580926

Um, maybe? It certainly sounds like either something we'd do, or something that has been been done to us. Maybe during that Idol Show we were on?

>> No.34581006

I'm glad Killdozer sempai and Forklift-chan worked things out; things kind of came to head that season, with Killdozer taking the initiative and Forklift chan accepting Dozer-san's proposal

>> No.34581033

Yeah, and in that warehouse they'll raise little Tonka Truck Killdozers and Forklifts. It'll be great

>> No.34581043

“Welcome to flight 2369, service to Myrmekion. The Captain will be undocking momentarily, and we request that you strap into your G-harness. Please seal all drinks, and remember, for those prone to lo-G sickness, there are regurgitation tubes available upon command.”

This is the final leg in your journey down to Atlas to help train the new batch of rookies, the former Himawari force being part of that group. You initially took a shuttle off of the Brick which dropped you off at Icarus Station, the gateway between Atlas and the rest of the universe. The station is designed to serve a hub for both good and people. Freight elevators bind the station into orbital lock with the planet, leading to a constant eclipse over the Enkaymatan Wastes. You won’t be taking a freight elevator down to Atlas however. No, your destination is on the far side of the planet, the city of Myrmekion, where Camp Bradsfordshirewoodsburg is located at the outskirts. And to get there you get to ride in the lap of (relative) luxury, a Maxis CH-780 Spaceplane.

Your head turns involuntarily to follow the sway of the stewardess’ bootay as she walks down the shuttle, helping people, children mostly, strap into their G-harnesses for take off. Yes, despite your penchant for nausea when placed in cryo, you’re very resistant to lo-G sickness, which is quite the blessing. Nothing more annoying than having to clean up vomit when it can float around your head. Leaning back in your seat, you glance over at the persona sitting next to you. Seems to be a middle aged woman of some flavor, and she’s nailing you with the stink eye. Wondering what the shit her problem is, you close your eyes and plug up your ears. Even if you aren’t bothered by the transition out of the Gart Field, you are bothered by the sound of people gagging.

>> No.34581061

As you close your eyes and enter your Ivan Zen State, which is rather different than Grit Mode as you’ve come to think of it. Instead you just close your eyes and let time and space pass you by. You do eventually rouse yourself to watch atmospheric entry. That’s always cool. The flaming contrails whip past your window as the blue and green ball grows larger, eventually transitioning from sphere to landscape. You squint a little, trying to pick out the training facility StrikeOut operates on Atlas. It’s kind of hard, both due to the distance and the furiously red contrails obscuring your vision. You can hear irritated sniffing from your middle aged compatriot. The spaceplane jostles a bit as it encounters some turbulence. You can almost feel your fellow passenger tense up beside you, her hands wrapping tight around her restraints.

“Would you kindly quit gawking? Are you some stroid-bound yokel with no understanding of etiquette? Don’t you know it’s rude to leave your viewscreen open, or do you intend to ogle Atlas like you did our flight attendant?”

The sheer condensation in that last question catches your attention and you turn your head slowly to face your middle aged seat mate. Her expression of righteous indignation is ruined by the evident undercurrent of nerves, her hands clamped around her harness.

>How do you respond?
>comply and “shut the window”

>> No.34581105

Ready like you wouldn't fuckin believe.

Good to see you back from workin' fo da man, Fall Guy. You rollin n dat green, now?

>> No.34581116

>How do you respond?
"Don't you know its rude to be a condescending hag, and yes I do intent to ogle the planet, gods above know there aren't any windows on drop pods."

>> No.34581125

How is that bothering you ma'am? Make your case.

>> No.34581181

Sorry, ma'am. It's just that keeping my eyes on the outside keeps my stomach settled. I've got a bad case of low g sickness you see, and if I (hurk) EXCUSE ME (BLAUGH)!!!

>> No.34581205

seconding >>34581116

>> No.34581207

>"No ma'am, I think I'll continue to gawk if you don't mind. Not that I care if you do mind, but it is proper etiquette to ask."

>> No.34581209

"I'm sorry ma'am. Usually when I go through reentry I'm on my way to kill some people, so I thought I'd enjoy it without the blood and screaming for once. Does it bother you?"

>> No.34581215

This so much.

Maybe if she moves, we could get the entire row to ourselves!

>> No.34581220


I'm sorry ma'am, I'll ogle you instead if you'd like.

>> No.34581235


"I'm sorry, but I hope you don't mind if I leave the screen open a bit longer, orbital assault drop pods don't usually have windows."

>> No.34581243

Oh man, so many good writeins! I don't know what to pick, guys!

>> No.34581260

These, oh god these.

>> No.34581261

I like this >>34581209

>> No.34581263

>Wonder when fall guy would return, only remember it being this month.
>Open /tg/ see Deniable Assets.

Also seconding >>34581125

>> No.34581275

bookmark his twitter anon

>> No.34581281

These, I think. It just feels very Ivan to hit on the middle aged lady

>> No.34581303

>It just feels very Ivan to hit on the middle aged lady
this bint? nah fuck that, Ivan has taste, and already has his sights set on other targets

>> No.34581310

Direct our ogle phasers to stun, gentlemen

>> No.34581315



But afterwards try to talk her through her apparent fear of dying in a fiery ball of failed re-entry.

>> No.34581317

But then there wouldn't be any surprise in the world.
Unless we finally get a nat30, I got a 29 once while channeling Thor but it's just not the same.

>> No.34581331

Didn't Ivan hit on the armorer? The middle aged, not very attractive looking armorer? Ivan's got taste, yes, but he seems like the kind of guy to flirt because it's fun or humorous

>> No.34581345

At this point I think it's less Ivan seriously hitting on women and more a mix of his sense of humor and general persona.

>> No.34581347

I'd say it's very Ivan to pretend to hit on the middle aged lady.

Not to actually want to bang her but be funny or disarming.

Like this guy said >>34581331

>> No.34581359

>Didn't Ivan hit on the armorer?
Nope, more friendly ribbing and jokes

>> No.34581365

No, he didn't, and she's past middle age, like, way past it.

>> No.34581374

Well, we could always roll another nat3...

>> No.34581380

Alright, mixing these two up.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but I hope you don't mind if I leave the screen open a bit longer, orbital assault drop pods don't usually have windows."

wait a beat

"I thought I'd enjoy reentry without the blood and screaming for once. Does it bother you?"

How 'bout that?

>> No.34581387

>slut quest is back
Fuck off

>> No.34581393

No we didn't.

fucking sweet

>> No.34581403

Maybe fake flirt a bit, but yeah.

>> No.34581412

>How 'bout that?
Sounds good, no need for flirting, our friends get that, and also people who deserve it, this bitch doesn't get that.

>> No.34581415

Good enough

>> No.34581425

>Hit on

If you classify throwing a shelf at a woman after hitting her with replica weapons then sure, Ivan hit on her.

>> No.34581426

Try to flirt with her to see her reaction

>> No.34581439

That's good. Don't forget to look her in the eyes directly for a little too long to make her reconsider annoying us.

>> No.34581440

Yeah son

>> No.34581446

Fuck off with this shit, its grossly out of character and stupid.

>> No.34581475

Granted, that's also how we got Valk into us, so fighting could be said to be flirting.

How about I think it's not, you think it is, we vote how we want and it comes out how it comes out ok?

>> No.34581494 [DELETED] 

>that's also how we got Valk into us
No it isn't, we performed well on our first drop, impressed her, and she slammed us against a brick wall and ravished us, thats how we got her 'into us'.

>> No.34581525

We're clearly surrounded by Klingon's with a really good bluff skill.

>> No.34581529

What no it isn't, Ivan totally seems the type to fake flirt to get a rise or compliment someone

>> No.34581561

To people he knows and friends and colleges, not some random snobby bitch on the shuttle

>> No.34581583

I think at this point it'd mostly be to distract her from the whole fear of dying thing. Admittedly that's probably a bad tactic to use at the moment, especially if we leave our window open.

>inb4 she asks us to switch to our e-glasses so we can watch rentry without freaking her the hell out.
There is a non-asshole option guys.

>> No.34581596

>There is a non-asshole option guys.
And she didn't take it.

>> No.34581604

Nailed it

>> No.34581610


sounds good.

also, voting against flirting. just in case we are legitimately considering that...

>> No.34581630

Bunch of white knight and pure fags getting ready to shit up the quest, it seems.

>> No.34581656

Ivan is far from being close to either of those two things anon

>> No.34581698

There's a difference between not wanting to bone a middle aged lady and being a purefag.

>> No.34581722

So not obsessively flirting with some random bitch sticking her nose in our business and being a snob is whiteknighting and being a purefag...

>> No.34581745

White Knight? Maybe.

Purefag? Noooooo... Especially when we corrupted Svenja's desk to the point where she can't marry a good man-desk.

>> No.34581762

>Especially when we corrupted Svenja's desk to the point where she can't marry a good man-desk.
Think of all the furniture we've ruined for marriage with Valkyrie...

>> No.34581763

I personally took it as Ivan being more of a smartass towards the lady than any real flirting, which I find completely in character.

But to each their own.

>> No.34581796

You reach up and scratch your chin languidly. “I’m sorry ma’am, but I hope you don't mind if I leave the screen open a bit longer, orbital assault drop pods don't usually have windows."

You note with some pleasure that your stern seatmate’s face goes even more pale at the mention of orbital assault drop pods. She mouths wordlessly as the corners of your mouth pull up into a slight yet predatory smile. “I thought I might enjoy reentry without the blood and screaming for once. Does it bother you?”

Watching in fascination as your seatmate deflates, the attitude scared right out of her, you grin a little more before shutting down the viewscreen and putting in some earbuds. Honestly, things were getting a little too bright.

The rest of the flight down to Myrmekion passes by uneventfully, although your seatmate does take a good deal of caution to avoid bumping your duffle bag as you pull it down from overhead storage. You pass through the terminal, bypassing security lines and queues with a simple flash of your identcard. People watch your passage with the curiosity of the idle.

After a while you find yourself out of the terminal, where an automated automobile is waiting to pick you up. Clambering into the vehicle, you kick back and relax as it accelerates gracefully out of the airport and towards Camp Bradswoodsburgshireford. A file appears in the corner of your e-glasses. You scroll over it. A dossier of the rookies you’ll be training.

>Do you
>Open and read it
>ignore and nap until you arrive at Camp Fordsbradshirewoodsburg


Sorry about the slow posting speed here guys, still trying to get back into the swing of things.

>> No.34581822

>Open and read it

>> No.34581829

>Sorry about the slow posting speed here guys, still trying to get back into the swing of things.
no probs dude, slow posting is better than no posting

>Open and read it

>> No.34581830

>>Open and read it
That's quite a mouthfull to say.

>> No.34581853

>Open and read it

Don't worry about the speed. Do what you gotta do

I'm just so happy you're back

>> No.34581854

>>Open and read it

>> No.34581856


>> No.34581868

>Open and read it
>Take a note of potential troublemakers and dumb asses. Only we can be a wild card.

Might as well see what we're in for

>> No.34581877

>Open and read it

Whatever else we are, Ivan is a professional.

>> No.34581886


>> No.34581887

>Open and read it

Also, can we get a report card on Chisaki, Miyuki, and Hikaru, if I recall? We need to see what they need to improve on.

>> No.34581890

Does Thunder-tits count as a dumb-ass since she signed up for this woefully unprepared or is it just adorable?

>> No.34581906

Read the FUCK out of that file. After openning the FUCK out of it.

>> No.34581938

>woefully unprepared
For the kind of missions and drops we go on? Totally, for the many many other roles she and the rest of Himewari Force can fulfill as idol mercs for SO, not so.

I reckon they can get a good job doing lower safer missions, peacekeeping and PR branding missions and such, rather than the kind of wetwork we do.

>> No.34581985

That's what I thought, but apparently flirting means your seeking consent to insert prong a into slot b

>inb4 'this is tg, what did you expect'

Anyway, >Open and read it'

>> No.34582001


Open and read it.

Then, when one of the recruits brings attention to themselves, we can call them out by name...
let them know that Yes, we know who they are, and Yes, you cared enough to remember them...

Also, they must learn to properly fear HR, that way, we seem tougher as we get on with our HR rep...

Would using our HART be overkill in training? Cause I think it would liven up the regime once they start to 'get into the groove'
Just imagine the looks on their faces when the scale the wall and end up staring down the primary weapons system of the HART, and the only warning they got was "I've added an extra part to today's obstacle course"...

>> No.34582002

Guys, at this moment, this became DAQ again. :)

>> No.34582008

More likely than not they could be set up as PR images, showing that yes, even drop out Idol-mercs can get the tough jobs and succeed.

Unless they REALLY want the tough jobs. Then we train the FUCK out of them.

That is, after lewding the FUCK out of them.

>> No.34582022

Yeah, we should check up on that, see what they need to work on.

Hopefully, Thundertits found a gun that was comfortable for her, or at least got a bra that could handle the stress.

Wonder if it could handle some more stress...

>> No.34582027

>>Open and read it
Find puns and jokes to make with the name of your vict- rookies.

>> No.34582042

god damn auto-correct...
Mean BART not HART...
I swear, auto-correct will start WWIII... mark my words...

>> No.34582049

>Open and read it

>> No.34582059

>drop out
If anything, they are moving up in the world

>> No.34582066

>your vict- rookies.

>> No.34582098

Why do you think megacorps rule the galaxy now, anon? Causing WWIII was the plan when SIRI came to the drawing board.

>> No.34582121

Oh no doubt they most certainly are. but they "failed" or rather, were "cut" from the Idol-Merc show.

Oh god. that explains so many things....

>> No.34582185

I like to think we poached them, and that they were undervalued where they were, and now we can value the shit out of them

>> No.34582203

>now we can value the shit out of them
Oh yes, yes we will value the FUCK out of them.

>> No.34582284

>Would using our HART be overkill in training?

I know what you meant but all I can imagine is Ivan training the rookies by singing "I'll make a merc' outta you

>> No.34582327

We must write this. Now.

>> No.34582329

Oh god please. Let this happen.

Not really, though that'd be hilarious

>> No.34582365


Holy fuck yes.

>> No.34582428

Be my guest

>> No.34582464

Rolled 6, 9, 7 = 22 (3d10)

Rolling for singing skill!

>> No.34582495


>> No.34582498

First two verses (with my apologies):

Merc-ing is our business
For a load of cash
We'll get in our drop pods
and go kick - some ass!

You've the biggest tits i've ever met,
but you'll bet before you're through
Missy, I'll make a merc, out of you....

Trained by those before us
A bad-ass soul, within
Freakin massive armor,
And a death's...head grin!

You're here to learn the lore
Of waging war, and you've got a lot to do
Don't worry, I'll make a merc
Out of youuuu....

This could actually become a thing, if you guys contribute edits

>> No.34582501

Rolled 3, 3, 1 = 7 (3d10)

Rolling Grit check!

>> No.34582502

Not too shabby.

>> No.34582522

Somewhat related

>> No.34582532

I like it so far

>> No.34582533

That's much better than it has any right to be.

>> No.34582554

Keep going guys? I'll do it if you like...

>> No.34582567

Yup. this is the DAQ I know and love.

>> No.34582568

Anon, you've lost your rolling privilege for tonight, please hand over your dice.

>> No.34582586


>> No.34582598

If you continue we will love the FUCK out of you.

>> No.34582624

Done. It'll be posted sometime in this thread. You may now return to your regularly scheduled mayhem.

>> No.34582635


>> No.34582648

Rolled 4, 3, 3 = 10 (3d10)


Also you gotta do it man.
Become Based, hero of threads!

>> No.34582671

Rolled 1, 2, 8 = 11 (3d10)


Let's see if I can roll another 1,1,1

>> No.34582673

What are the odds of one of the rookies knowing where we took the melody from? Very low isn't it?
They'd think we came up with that on the spot or something, a few years later you'll heard all the merc in training sing that we running around the base and shit.

>> No.34582707

Ivan does like old movies...

There's no reason this can't be a thing. Fall Guy. We need it.

>> No.34582715

Meanwhile the Millennium gets a tear in his eye from nostalgia.

Or his processors inform him that he remembers that song fondly and he files it away in his memory banks.

>> No.34582716

Rolled 8, 9, 9 = 26 (3d10)

Yeah, hand over the dice please.

That. would be fucking brilliant.

>> No.34582731

Rolled 5, 10, 9 = 24 (3d10)


>> No.34582745

>Rolled 8, 9, 9 = 26 (3d10)


>> No.34582746

Awwwwww... Such a waste...

>> No.34582765

Rolled 9, 8, 5 = 22 (3d10)

Oh god we'd better stop or we'll use all the good rolls before the nightthread is over.

>> No.34582773

christ on a stick guys save the rolls

>> No.34582833

Rolled 5, 6, 8 = 19 (3d10)


Also once songanon's done someone that can sing must vocaroo that shit.
Or we have a Deniable Assets questfag's "sing Make a merc out of you"

>> No.34582844

Diceanon, what did I tell you about rolling responsibly?!

That's it, Mister! You are grounded! No more joyrides in the quest threads!

>> No.34582863

Songanon here. I post enough I'll make a name. Posting under ASR from here on.

>> No.34582918

Rolled 2, 1, 1, 2, 1, 1, 1, 2, 2, 2 = 15 (10d3)


>> No.34582922

Rolled 3, 7, 9 = 19 (3d10)

Okay so we keep going? Sounds good to me lets see if it keeps going down.

>> No.34582934


>> No.34582984

Rolled 9, 10, 7 = 26 (3d10)


>> No.34583017

Rolled 10, 6, 10 = 26 (3d10)


>> No.34583024

Rolled 9, 1, 7 = 17 (3d10)

Oh fuck. we're still getting good rolls.

Gotta keep getting the FUCK out of them.

>> No.34583044




>> No.34583047

Rolled 7, 5, 7 = 19 (3d10)

Let's keep going and see what happens.

>inb4 someone gets a 3 tens

>> No.34583050

You decide to check and see who you’ll be training in this batch of rookies. Even Thundertits’ ...thundertits... wouldn’t be worth dealing with another Markos. Besides, it might help to actually know the Himawari Force’s names, rather than just “Glasses Girl”, “Green Hair”, etc.

>Marek Vallbourg “Funky Bunch”
>1.73 m
>>Aggression issues, prone to outbursts of (impotent) anger. Frequently claims to be a peacock. Psych evaluation has determined that this is a figurative, not literal statement. Very mission/goal oriented. Good motivator for fellow recruits, possible officer candidate in the future assuming anger management succeeds.
>Primary Training: Assault Rifles, Grenadier

>Chisaki Kweon
You quickly mark her down as “Green Hair” from the Himawari Force
>1.54 m
>>Has a strongly competitive personality, and is prone to antagonizing fellow recruits, especially Marek. She is much friendlier to Miyuki and Hikaru, although she does maintain a certain level of competition with the latter. Although boisterous she follows orders to the letter. One of Kostov’s bunch.
>Primary Training: Shotguns, CQC

>Fausto Cardoso
>1.87 m
>>Despite being the tallest recruit in this batch, Fausto bucks the trend with his very passive personality. He is frequently a target for Marek’s aggression, although this might be due to his tendency to attempt to moderate disagreements between rookies. A calming influence, but not commanding. Poor leadership potential.
>Primary Training: Heavy Weapons, Vehicle Operation

>> No.34583077

>Hikaru Sato
Right, the one with blue hair and glasses.
>1.50 m
>>Another calm personality, but not calming. Hikaru is very calculating in her approach to combat, but also stern and slightly controlling. She and Marek butt heads on occasion over leadership decisions. Very protective of Miyuki, whom she has a soft spot for. Frequently bosses both Miyuki and Fausto around, due to their compliant personalities. High officer potential. Also one of Ivan’s.
>Primary Training: Sniper Rifles, Scouting, Small Unit Tactics

>Miyuki Kano
Under her name you can see a whole bunch of annotations
>>got some undeniable assets
>>give it five tits outta boobs
>>10/10 would waifu
>>What the shit is waifu
>1.62 m
>>Ignoring the twin impediments on her chest Miyuki seems to have a great deal of combat potential once she gets over her skittishness. Another non-imposing personality, she largely does what is demanded of her to the best of her ability. She lacks leadership potential, but has hidden depths. More capable than one might think. One of Ivan’s bunch.
>Primary Training: Heavy weapons, field medic

Well that sorts out that. Seems like you contributed the greater part of this batch of rookies. Maybe you should be a recruiter instead of whoever the hell is responsible for that shit. You’re pretty pleased to see that the Himawari Force has garnered at least neutral to positive attention from trainers. You’d hate to think about the possible hit to your reputation if you set StrikeOut up with a bunch of airheaded morons.

>> No.34583092


>Frequently claims to be a peacock.

You gotta let him fly!

>> No.34583096

>One of Kostov’s bunch.


>> No.34583101

You feel the auto decelerate. Checking your e-glasses you see that you have arrived at Camp Fordshirebradsburgwood. You snap your back before clambering out of the car. As the door opens you hear a chorus of voices shout “We salute you, Senior Contractor Kostov!”

Memories of boot camp flashback and you wait for the rookies to complete the now familiar ritual. Once they finish addressing you and introducing themselves, with Thundert- Miyuki bouncing during her salute, the rookies line back up again, waiting for you to speak.

>What do you say?
>No real speech.
>Write in some shit.

>> No.34583114

I like the sound of Fausto, seems like he might make a good squadmate in the future, also passive Heavy weapon guys are hard to come by

>> No.34583170

Rolled 6, 2, 9 = 17 (3d10)

Lets assume that Songanon(ASR) has finished and that is our speech?

Otherwise, be a hard-ass and say "Imma train the FUCK out of you. You will enjoy the FUCK out of it, if you don't, get the FUCK out. Any FUCKING questions?"

>> No.34583171

Uh, at ease I guess.
So how are you all doing?, WHO'S READY TO BECOME BADASS MERC'S?

>> No.34583173

It keeps happening

>> No.34583176

Rolled 8, 4, 5 = 17 (3d10)

>>What do you say?
Whatever you say, end it with: "Oh and where is the bathroom?"

>> No.34583186

Have they been doing basic before we showed up? Or is this their first day?

>> No.34583212

They've been training for a while now.

>Implying it'll stop

Remember guys, you're here to do CQC training.

>> No.34583217

Rolled 6, 3, 3 = 12 (3d10)

I believe they've been doing basic before we showed up. Else we wouldn't have decent reports about their leadership skills and aptitudes.

>> No.34583267

Start out relaxed but commanding.

Become a hardass as necessary.

Well, then give a speech about how if any of them thing CQC isn't necessary in this day and age, then they should ask all the people you've killed and BART's you've taken out with your tomohawk (yes it's ok to be a little excessive)

Tell them they'll learn at the very least a competent level of what you've got and the specialists may get a little more.

>> No.34583280

get pumped

>> No.34583286

"Good day recruits, glad to see you all so full of energy, let's put it to use, I am here to instruct you all in the finer arts of getting up close and personal with your foes, so to that end first person to successfully land a hit on me doesn't have to run 3kms."

>> No.34583297

At ease rook's
Wait for them to stand down
Now I am told that I am supposed to teach some up and coming Merc's how to kick ass in CQC, would you tell me where they are because all I can see is a group of wannabee's?

Wink at the 3 girls

>> No.34583323

Question, do we have an information on the drop outs from this training class? I just want to know how many didn't make it to this point.

>> No.34583354

Personal information was deleted as per HR regulations, but there are two blank dossiers that would indicate a couple of drop outs.

>> No.34583403


"Welcome, recruits. In the time you've been here, your limits have been pushed physically, mentally, and your skills have been improved with demanding drills. Here's where shit gets real. My job is to teach you to fuck up your enemy without a fancy gun to hide behind - to force him to meet you at arms length or less and remove him from your path with fist, foot, nails, teeth, and whatever melee weapon God saw fit to let you have when you find your foe. You will be decisively engaged - you will win or you will die. And by the time I'm done with you, you'll do it, you'll win, and you'll probably like it."

>> No.34583444


>> No.34583457

"I'm here to train you in the basics of close quarters combat, namely the defense of it. If you have the aptitude for it I'll train you further. Most of you, based on your dossiers, don't have much, if any, training in CQC. the only I saw was Chisaki Kweon. With that said, She'll be assisting in teach you all. Don't think of her as a teacher, just a secondary instructor to help me great this through to you."

>> No.34583474

Yeah more or less this.

>> No.34583585

This is perfect.

>> No.34583593

I like this one. If Marek gets smart, he gets to be the volunteer for grappling.

>> No.34583634

And Miyuki gets extra special grappling training right?

>> No.34583682

You mean hand holding right?

>> No.34583688

Learning how to use her tits as a counter weight for advanced small joint manipulation?

>> No.34583703

Yes. Hand holding. And hugs DEFINATELY hugs.

>> No.34583711

ALL our girls will get some special grappling training. The trick is to have them eventually all train together at once.

>> No.34583740


>> No.34583753

I would actual like to see that actually be a thing, but I don't think Ivan knows how that works.

Ivan "loses"

He still wins.

>> No.34583788

In the mud? Then a celebratory group shower? Then Waffles and Pancakes? All while we sing the training song.

>> No.34583808

I will now lead group warmup exercises
first up jumping jacks
miyuki please demonstrate

>> No.34583840

Training song 80%. Doing spoken part, one line in the refrain and one final verse.

>> No.34584169

everybody fapping

>> No.34584223

Rolled 2, 5, 2 = 9 (3d10)

Sorry, wasn't posting, I was too busy masturbating furiously.

>> No.34584273

Ok, I've got the song. Not a final version, as I have doubts about the third line of the spoken part, and the second to the last verse....

Posting now. My apologies

>> No.34584329

Merc-ing is our business
For a load of cash
We'll get in our drop pods
and go kick - some ass!

You've the biggest tits i've ever met,
but you bet before i'm through
Missy, I'll make a merc, out of you....

Trained by those before us
A bad-ass soul, within
Freakin massive armor,
And a death's...head grin!

You're here to learn the lore
Of waging war, and you've got a lot to do
Don't worry, I'll make a merc
Out of youuuu....

Fausto: I'm never gonna live through this...
Miyuki: The DI is trying to screw me!
Chisaki: Must be twenty seconds faster on this run...
Marek: Is it too late to go back to school?
Hikaru: I'm gonna wow those who knew me!
Chisaki: Ouch, I Should have picked a smaller gun

All the remorse of a wild lion
And as tight as the cheapest jew
The true cunning of a gun for hire...
Aggressive as Valkrie coming for youuuuu!!

Time seems to take forever
Till extraction arrives
Keep teamwork under fire
And you'll all leave alive...

Looks like, you're loving more the wage of war
Here, have another drop to do
I guess I've made a merc
Out of you....
All the remorse of a wild lion
And as tight as the cheapest jew
The true cunning of a gun for hire...
Aggressive as Valkrie coming for youuuuu!!
All the remorse of a wild lion
And as tight as the cheapest jew
The true cunning of a gun for hire...
Aggressive as Valkrie coming for youuuuu!!

Edits? Final score?

>> No.34584375

Rolled 10, 4, 9 = 23 (3d10)

Would sing again.

>> No.34584390


Motherfucker that's beautiful.

>> No.34584403

We should show the video of our fight with dreads. Then explain that dreads was a legend in the business and he didn't take us seriously. We were better than he thought, and damned lucky, and he as a result he died to a pair of rookies on their second drop. Lesson here: don't screw around in combat, or in training. Liberty is another matter entirely of course.was

>> No.34584441

I fucking love you Anon

>> No.34584464

Like this suggestion.

>> No.34584540

>And as tight as the cheapest jew

If only our Heavy Weapons friend (whose name I cannot fucking remember right now because it's been months) would follow that advice...

>> No.34584573

You stiffen up, recalling a choice speech that one of your instructors, as it would later turn out it was Darius messing with you all again, gave before beginning basic equipment maintenance lessons. You feel like something in a similar vein might be a fun way to start off, at least for you. You begin to prowl past the rookies, scowling at each one in turn. The facade almost breaks as Thund- Miyuki gives you a little wave, but you hold strong. After reaching the end of the short line, you turn around and begin speaking as you walk back up it.

"Welcome, recruits,” You start speaking in an unusually gruff register, as all good drill sergeants should. “In the time you've been here, your limits have been pushed physically, mentally, and your skills have been improved with demanding drills. Here's where shit gets real. My job is to teach you to fuck up your enemy without a fancy gun to hide behind - to force him to meet you at arms length or less and remove him from your path with fist, foot, nails, teeth, and whatever melee weapon God saw fit to let you have when you find your foe. You will be decisively engaged - you will win or you will die. And by the time I'm done with you, you'll do it, you'll win, and you'll probably like it."

You finish speaking with a downright predatory grin plastered across your face, leering at your prospective trainees. They seem to be quite cowed. Well everyone except Marek, who has managed to put on a show of bravado over his disconcertion. “You talk some big shit right there teach. But I fucking doubt you can back that shit up. Look at you. You’re like my grandmother’s tampon. Soft, white and spends a lotta time shoved up a leathery cooch.

>> No.34584575

This is a very good idea. Explain it is very possible to live or die by the futuristic super-sonic tomahawk

>> No.34584599

You stare at Marek. This little shit thinks that cause you only recently ascended from rookiedom he can talk shit. That he's your goddamn equal. His chest puffed out like a goddamn pelican or some shit, like he’s the goddamn commanding officer present. Time to correct that.

>”Is that insubordination Recruit?” (Write in along those lines)
>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)
>Write in something else

>> No.34584609


>> No.34584619

>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)

Smash the little shit in the nuts.

>> No.34584622

>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)
Come at me bro

then we take him down fast and effective

>> No.34584637

Rolled 10, 2, 6 = 18 (3d10)

The song.

Alternatively, either show them the footage of the fight against Dreads or sucker punch him.

>> No.34584649

Play "Catch painfully and repeat" with him.

>> No.34584653

>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)

Walk up like we're about to yell, then headbutt. No words.

>> No.34584654

Smile, offer him a pat on the shoulder, then fucking judo throw his ass over his head.

>> No.34584656

>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)

This gentleman badly wants a knee to the groin.

>> No.34584663

Smile and gaze into the distance before looking at him.
"Follow me Rook's, got a little vid to get you started.
Show the class the footage of Dreads being rekt and do >>34584403, then ask him if he wants a tussle.

>> No.34584684

Honestly I think the funniest, most effective thing we could do is just burst out laughing. Like into tears, lean on someone and and repeat shit he just said "Holy fuck, leathery cooch, seriously? That's adorable rookie."

>> No.34584709

>(plan of attack)

Analyze his style, breakdown it's weaknesses, give a running commentary on how he's fucking up/leaving himself open to attack while toying with him, then take him down. This is a teachable moment on multiple levels.

>> No.34584713

"You're gonna need more than that big mouth if you want to make it through my training without wetting yourself girlie. Now to the first order of business let's watch a video detailing the basics of what you're about to be put through"

Then show them the Dreads video.

>> No.34584736

He thinks he's people!

>> No.34584738


>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)

The attitude we want here is professional. Our behavior should say: "Nothing personal, old buddy. I'm going to disassemble you because thats what I do - you need to realize you don't know a fucking thing. I also expect you to be a little shit, so I hold a grudge, and you won't because I'll kick your ass again if you do."

>> No.34584739

Fuck it.

>inb4 Marek is Val's grandson.

>> No.34584759


WON'T hold a grudge. WON'T

>> No.34584762

OI mate you wanna have a go, OI sware on me mum you fockin cunt I'll deck you in the gob chroist help me you gormless tosser

>> No.34584766

Rolled 5, 4, 10 = 19 (3d10)


>>Write in something else

It has been too long.

Rolling for Dance Mode.

>> No.34584774


>> No.34584775

>”Seems like Rookie Marek has volunteered for a CQC demonstration.” (Plan of attack)
And then show his punk ass the folly of his ways

"Hey Marek... Ever been suplexed?"

>> No.34584780


>> No.34584803

Rolled 7, 8, 10 = 25 (3d10)

And Grit check

>> No.34584934

Alright, we'll be applying the beatdown apparently.

While I write some stuff to start things off, work out a plan of attack. You will be calling him forward from the line of recruits. He'll most likely be the first to (attempt) to strike.

>> No.34584967

It's like no one here has read fucking Starship troopers. Are we really going to stroke our ego-boos through the training exercise?

>> No.34584978

Remember all these 25+ we wasted earlier? A shame we won't have them now

>> No.34585001

Dodge (attempted) strike.

Painful blow, but not crippling.

Painful joint lock he can't get out of.

Explain to him who exactly he's fucking with.

>> No.34585002

Its not about our ego

It's about making sure some punk kid doesn't get his head split open because he underestimated an enemy.

Okay, maybe a bit about ego too

>> No.34585010

Rolled 8, 3, 3 = 14 (3d10)

Sucker punch him first.

>> No.34585020

Ideally I think we should catch his blow then break what ever joint is closest. No fuss, no muss.

>> No.34585023

Dealing with Marek isn't about ego, it's about teaching him just how much of a novice he is.

>> No.34585029


well then

>> No.34585043

That will prove nothing except that we're a dick.

We need to bait him into throwing the first punch.

>> No.34585050

Call him a turkey and make him angry. It probably make him go stupid and charge recklessly. Then when he tries to hit us, easily dodge and get behind him. Then suplex him.

>> No.34585054

It's a lot about ego. We can communicate the importance of CQC without highlighting how much of a badass we are. The recruits will figure that out themselves or leave.

>> No.34585058

You counting that grit check from earlier Fall Guy?

>> No.34585073

Rolled 4, 2, 7 = 13 (3d10)

Not sure if going in grit mode here IS a good idea.

>> No.34585082

gotta call for it first anon. Can't be going grit mode on some poor rookies after all.

>> No.34585093

If you recall, some recruit DID challenge the DI and got beat for it. For the reason of "Oh, well, I guess I have to teach you infants that you really DON'T know how to fight."

>> No.34585101

Rolled 8, 3, 4 = 15 (3d10)

Oatmeal mode then?

>> No.34585118

Rolled 1, 1, 2 = 4 (3d10)

Zen teacher mode roll.

>> No.34585120

Rolled 3, 10, 7 = 20 (3d10)


>> No.34585136

Dodge his attack, we know its coming and he'll probably telegraph it a bit more than he should. Feint a blow to gut or head, stomp on his foot instead, then headbutt him.

>> No.34585143

Rolled 10, 2, 7 = 19 (3d10)


Nah, just block everything he throws at us without even trying, and then say "You done?"

>> No.34585147

You. Stop that.

>> No.34585150


Also we should mention we took down a MAHWM in CQC with a BART.

>> No.34585154

...looks like they just entered Hell week. Would one lower have meant we took them into a live fire exercise for shits and giggles?

>> No.34585155

Anon pls.

>> No.34585161

It's also about respect. He doesn't have to like us (or, more importantly, his superiors in general), but he damn well better respect his superiors.

>> No.34585187

Actually, in the book, he challenged people to come do it. Then annihilated them and - afterwards - talked to them about how they could improve. He was proving himself through action. He didn't talk to much he just kicked their asses.

The DI doesn't have to tell you he's better than you, he just IS better than you. To think otherwise means you are an idiot or suicidal.

>> No.34585205

So is it like a 1/500 chance to get this roll?

>> No.34585227

one in 333 I think.

>> No.34585240

Rolled 3, 1, 8 = 12 (3d10)

>Rolling to seduce Marek
And then we should get a shotgun!

>> No.34585242

More like 3/1000.

>> No.34585262

Thank you.

>> No.34585274


>> No.34585278

Rolled 7, 6, 10 = 23 (3d10)

Also why didn't that greentext?

>> No.34585282

Exactly. He didn't explain himself because acting like you are worthy of respect makes people tend to treat you with respect. It's when they failed to do so that they were reminded of WHY they should respect him - cause he has the skills.

>> No.34585334

True. I simply feel a video of us fighting dreads is unnecessary because that would be an explanation.

>> No.34585366

To be fair, Ivan has a bit of an ego

>> No.34585411

Alright, going for some sort of catch/counter to the first strike, followed up with feint attack to the head. This is followed be another feint to the gut before we get him into a hold and follow up with a headbutt.


>> No.34585432

Rolled 4, 9, 7 = 20 (3d10)


>> No.34585435

Rolled 6, 8, 6 = 20 (3d10)


>> No.34585438

We already got a shotgun now. We got it in the same mission where we got Tankdozer II-sempai and Forklift-chan together.

>> No.34585454

Rolled 1, 9, 2 = 12 (3d10)


Kick him in the ovaries!

>> No.34585461

Rolled 4, 9, 6 = 19 (3d10)


>> No.34585466

Rolled 10, 9, 2 = 21 (3d10)


>> No.34585475

Rolled 5, 9, 6 = 20 (3d10)


>> No.34585482

Rolled 3, 6, 2 = 11 (3d10)


>> No.34585488

Still some things you don't do.

>> No.34585489

Rolled 9, 7, 8 = 24 (3d10)


>> No.34585492


Are those testicles on Forklift-chan's nose?!? Oh, wow, this just went Yaoi...

>> No.34585496

Rolled 9, 6, 8 = 23 (3d10)


>> No.34585512

Rolled 6, 6, 6 = 18 (3d10)


You were saying?

>> No.34585514


Honestly, if you don't think their primary instructor isn't going to recommend they look up our fight with Dreads later this evening I think you're nuts. The video is out there and the kiddies are going to get exposed to it, heck, I'm pretty sure the trio have already seen it since we are their sponsor and all.

But i agree it's just better if it doesn't come from us right now.

>> No.34585546


Saying stupid shit and getting bad rolls: Correlation or Causation?

>> No.34585555


>Rolled 6, 6, 6

Ivan is Satan

>> No.34585571

Rolled 3, 8, 2 = 13 (3d10)

Did somebody say GRIT MODE?

>> No.34585582

Rolled 4, 7, 3 = 14 (3d10)

Maybe the RNG got a sense of humor.

>> No.34585585

The dice gods just know that it's a bad decision.

I didn't even notice. holyshit.

>> No.34585589

Hey, Fall Guy, you never gave an opinion on the training song...thoughts?

>> No.34585592

>Rolled 6, 6, 6 = 18 (3d10)

>> No.34585627

>did someone say GRIT MODE?

No, because we want to calmly dissect his CQC failings and flaws in front of the class, not scream incoherently.

>> No.34585639

>that recent upgrade to the dice roller was the first step toward Skynet

>> No.34585664

Rolled 6, 7, 3 = 16 (3d10)

Lets go for another Zen teacher mode then.

>> No.34585699

I liked it anon, just couldn't work it into the action without it turning the training into too much of a farce.

>> No.34585711

>DAQ is back

Brb fapping in celebration

>> No.34585729

You could write a montage scene later for fun.

>> No.34585749

The true Fappening begins here

>> No.34585783

Rolled 10, 2, 9 = 21 (3d10)

>skynet is learning from /pol/
We are truly doomed.

>> No.34586115

Rolled 6, 3, 2 = 11 (3d10)

Lets see how bad it is.

Hey RNG-chan, how do you get a nigger to go on a diet?

Hide his food stamps underneath his work-boots.

>> No.34586151

You look up and down Marek, eyeballing him. Recruit probably just got his musculo-skeletal enhancements. That would go a long way to explaining his cocksure attitude. You take a step back, before turning smartly on your heel and facing away from the assembled rookies. You take a few steps forward before stopping, hands clasped behind your back. “Well recruits. It seems Mr. Vallbourg here has decided to volunteer for a close quarters combat demonstration.”

There is a short pause as the rookies process what you have just said, then you hear Marek take a few steps forward. You continue speaking. “As I may or may not have said before rookies, your body is the most reliable weapon you possess, Guns jam, fists don’t. And trust me, those myocyte-packs make it into a true weapon. By learning to employ these enhancements you will become a lethal vector regardless of armament.”

You are about to continue talking but Marek interrupts you, bellowing, “Turn around and fight!”

>> No.34586174

The fist is slow. So slow, almost as if he’s trying to push it through mega-molasses or something. You catch it squarely in the palm of your hand. Marek’s eyes open in shock as your enhanced bone structure disperses the force of his blow into nothingness. You squeeze a bit, which causes him to wince. “Do you see rookies? although there are more effective holds by far, Recruit Marek is now open to a variety of counter attacks. Like so.”

Your fist lashes out, stopping mere millimeters away from Marek’s face. Another near hit halts milliseconds before shattering his ribcage.

Marek snarls with fury before attempting a counter strike with his free hand. You artfully release his fist and grab him, forcing the recruit into a modified hold, arms pinned down. You stare at him for half a second before slamming your forehead into his.

Somewhere far away a shower drips.

“And that recruits, is just part of the knowledge that I hope to impart upon you during my time planetside. Are there any questions?”

A chorus of no sirs. You pause for a moment, thinking.

>What is the first thing you wish to train your recruits on?
>Hand to hand
>Some third thing

>> No.34586182


Oh god...

>> No.34586219

>Hand to hand

Well, we started with hand-to-hand, might as well keep at it.

>> No.34586220

>Hand to hand

Give them the basics, then we move on to weaponry.

>> No.34586223

>>Hand to hand

Start with what we know they'll have, then work with what they might have.

>> No.34586244


>Hand to hand holding

>> No.34586255

Somewhere far away a shower drips.

>> No.34586258

Rolled 2, 6, 6 = 14 (3d10)

>>Hand to hand
Lets give them some hand on training.


>> No.34586264

>Hand to hand

>> No.34586302

>Somewhere far away a shower drips.
Is this implying you headbutted him so hard that the energy traveled through his body, into the ground, and shook a faucet?

If so, damn.

>> No.34586327

Bob and Clayton accidentally brush hands while handling a glass at the bar before awkwardly looking away.
The shower starts to pour

>> No.34586329

Nah it's just the homo shower enjoying some male to male face contact.

>> No.34586338

Nope. I think Homoerotic Shower somewhere is pleased with us.

>> No.34586344

>Hand to hand
>Third thing

Start with the basics (foot work, stances), move on to the practical aspects (how to move, how to attack, how to how block/defend and to read movements) and end with them pairing off for a brief sparring session. Since Marek is out cold we'll partner with Thun- I mean Miyuki.

>> No.34586354

Rolled 2, 4, 6 = 12 (3d10)

I believe it's in reference to Thread 5. or the running joke of our greatest Nemesis.

>> No.34586363


>> No.34586405

Thanks. New player here, obviously abstaining from votes until I've archive read though.

>> No.34586473

Oh you're welcome to vote, just be aware that while this is a serious (mostly) quest, it's written with a lot of humor. Personally I think it works pretty well, but it just letting you know to expect some silliness from time to time.

>> No.34586509

>He knows not of the homo shower

>> No.34586563

Have you read the previous threads?
If not yo're in for a treat, alongside /tg/'s patent autism.


>> No.34586582

Rolled 4, 1, 4 = 9 (3d10)

>Oh you're welcome to vote, just be aware that while this is a serious (mostly) quest, it's written with a lot of humor. Personally I think it works pretty well, but it just letting you know to expect some silliness from time to time.
Pretty much this. Imagine DAQ as an action series with a good dose of humor.

>> No.34586601

I still think that thing is connected to the "nano machine gestalt super intelligence" meta plot. Dispersal mechanism maybe? Signal amplifier (would explain why Ivan twigged to it when no one else's noticed it)?

Probably not, but I love me some crackpot theories.

>> No.34586617

Basically the average 80 action film in space, with extra /tg/.

>> No.34586650

Oh, I think a few threads didn't get archived or we're misarchived at the time, so of might need to do a search on the Moe archive to find what's missing.

>> No.34586687

Well good night gentlemen, keep up the fun.

>> No.34586715

Will keep in mind.
OP has a link to all his OP posts on moe. I made sure to bookmark it.

>> No.34586742


No! Do not speculate on the homo shower! For if you speculate on the shower, the shower speculates on you.

>> No.34586855

Hey all, gonna try and keep running till 404 or whenever my roommate decides it's time to get groceries. Sorry about the slow pace, I'm still getting back into the swing of things.

Really awesome to come back to such a lively thread. Ya'll are byootiful.

>> No.34586955

Rolled 3, 10, 1 = 14 (3d10)

We are just making sure you know we are around, and that We want you to keep going for as long as you can. And then show up again so we can bask in it's glory again.

>> No.34586974

Y-you too

>> No.34586988

We missed you big guy.

>> No.34587024

Just give us some of Miyuki's Miyuki's and all is forgiven.

>> No.34587077

This is actually a little feasible.

I like it

>> No.34587233

“I shall expound upon these techniques in the dojo. Come.” The rookies, with Marek back in line, nose bleeding like an undersexed japanese salaryman in a bullet train on a schoolday, form up and are about to march off before you stop them. “...And at ease everyone. This drill sergeant schtick has to end at some point. Might as well be now.”

The rookies look obviously relieved, especially Thu- Miyuki, and begin to walk towards the dojo. Marek shoots a somewhat resentful but mostly cowed glance at you before muttering something to Fausto. The larger man puts his hands up, and seems to be trying to calm down his shorter counterpart.

You glance over to the former Himawari force. They seem to be talking softly amongst themselves.

>Which group does Mr. Drill Man latch onto?
>Former Himawari Force
>See what’s going on with the two new rookies
>Neither, maintain professional distance
>Write in dialogue/action

>> No.34587287

Rolled 7, 9, 7 = 23 (3d10)

>>Former Himawari Force
Come on, they are the reason we're here.

Or rather, their tits are.

>> No.34587292

>Neither, maintain professional distance

For now, at least.

>> No.34587293

>See what’s going on with the two new rookies
Let's talk to Fousto.

>> No.34587347

>Neither, maintain professional distance

Let's see how they take training first before we try to socialize with them.

>> No.34587363

>>Former Himawari Force
Like there was any other choice.

>> No.34587366

>See what’s going on with the two new rookies

We already have the girls attention time to play hard to get.

>> No.34587376


>Neither, maintain professional distance

While we're on the job, we don't show favourites.

>> No.34587422

>Neither, maintain professional distance

>> No.34587424

>Neither, maintain professional distance

I knew we should have bought that hearing augment... Anyway, my vote is that we socialize with all of them AFTER class. Get to know the new two briefly then dismiss them and hang out with Himawari for a bit.

>> No.34587642

>Neither, maintain professional distance

When on work hours, at least. Off hours, time to join them for a drink at the bar/ at the mess hall/ shooting some pool/ on the dance floor!

>> No.34587646

>Neither, maintain professional distance

>> No.34587714

>Write in

Well, it seems like both groups have questions, call them together and see if we can answer a few. When Marek is predictably rude/wannabe-alpha-y, just let him know that he's welcome to walk and we'll just submit our evaluation of his CQC skills on the basis of his earlier display. Which is not good. Also, ask him what his aspirations are and remind him that part of being a good leader is grabbing every opportunity available to better yourself and your ability to keep yourself and your team alive. This would be one of those opportunities.

>> No.34587750


>just let him know that he's welcome to walk and we'll just submit our evaluation of his CQC skills on the basis of his earlier display.

If we do something along those lines, fuckin' seconded.

>> No.34587984

>Former Himawari Force
thund- miyuki

>> No.34588477

Rolled 4, 5, 1 = 10 (3d10)

Are you still alive fall guy?

>> No.34588517

Rolled 2, 7, 5 = 14 (3d10)

He is.He's either writing, or getting groceries. If he were doing the later he'd have told us.

>> No.34588567

Well, we'll know eventually.

>> No.34588649

You decide that decorum should be maintained while in the workplace. There will be time for extracurricular training in the nearish future after all. The walk proceeds quickly, and soon you all arrive at the dojo. You glance around and order the rookies to pair off. “Remember kids, doesn’t matter what gender your opponent is, we’re all superhuman mercs here.” The prospective mercs pair off rather quickly, Chisaki challenging Marek with some well placed barbs involving his peepee and something called penis inspection day. Shrugging off whatever the hell that’s supposed to mean, you notice that Miyuki and Fausto have paired off. Probably for the best, those two don’t seem like the sort to want to cause serious injury to one another. You don’t want to be on the receiving end of an injury suit after all.

You turn your attention to Hikaru, and she pushes her glasses further up her nose. “Well Kostov-sempai, it appears that we are partners.”

You shake your head and chuckle. “I’ll try to be gentle.”

Hikaru flushes slightly at your words. You don’t get what’s with the japanese and their flushing. “Alright, people, form up, it’s time to train.”


And it’s time for me to get groceries. Really glad to be back to you guys, and I swear to god, this slow ass posting speed issue will stop being a thing after a few sessions. I just need to get rid of three months worth of caked on cobwebs in my brain. Thank you for your patience, both today and leading up to this thread, you guys really are great. Coming back and hitting autosage was a great way to return to the questing scene and you guys made that happen. Next thread on thursday, check the twitter for details.

>> No.34588709

Thank you for the thread, see you later friend.

>> No.34588717

Rolled 5, 1, 6 = 12 (3d10)

Woot Woot! I get paid AND I get DAQ on Thursday? Fuckkkkk yeah. That is gunna be a good day.

>> No.34588744

>penis inspection day

Goddamnit FG. My sides are now being tracked as possible sub-orbital ICBMs. See you Thursday.

>> No.34588750

Thanks for running Fall! It's great to have you back.

>> No.34588762

No problem man! It's great to see you again, especially after waiting for you to get out from under the thumb of THE MAN.

Anyway, anyone know how to archive this thread?

>> No.34588786


Good to have you back. Meant to have this done for the thread but time snuck up on me. Oh well.

Thanks for running.

>> No.34588823

Don't worry, I got that one taken care of anon.

DRAWFRIEND! Looks supremely promising. I for am pumped to see the finished product.

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