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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.32246750 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Siegfried was here

Cuchulainn is a loser
And so is Hercules

>> No.32246789

Hou Yi here

Come back when you kill nine suns

>> No.32246826


>> No.32246941

I am curious. Indian mythology? Sounds crazy enough for them.

Also, are most of the ace heroes ia mythology barbarians? Cuchulainn and Hercules certainly fit the bill

>> No.32247075

Cu Chulainn wasn't really a barbarian, he was the same as most people back in that day where your honor was a big deal.

>> No.32247704


>> No.32247930

>using weapons

>> No.32248007

Didn't beowolf have a magic sword or some shit like that ?

>> No.32248166

no idea, but I know he killed grendal using only his bare arms

>> No.32248191


He looted a giant's sword from the bitch's mom's sweet stash, though.

>> No.32248213

Nah, Chinese.

Apparently there were originally ten suns and it was too hot because there was no night, so Houyi shot nine of them out of the sky. He was going to kill all ten but one of the gods distracted him so that he wouldn't doom the world to eternal night.

>> No.32248214

Hou Yi was chinese

>> No.32248305


>> No.32248310


>> No.32248346

I still prefer Cu Chulainn

>> No.32248477

didn't that sword break or melt with her acid blood or something?

it's been a bit since i read it, but I remember thinking "is there a sword that's worth a damn in this book?"

>> No.32251055

shut up, you are busy being soul caliburs bitch.

>> No.32251408


>> No.32251471


... i mean

>> No.32251556

I had a friend who always pronounced it soul calliper. I kind of want to see some soul callipers.

>> No.32252295

soul calliper, and its eternal enemy soul wedge

>> No.32254908

I have to say as far as origin stories go, killing a dragon and bathing in its blood (or burning it alive and rolling around in its boiling grease in some versions) to become invulnerable has to be pretty high up there.

>> No.32256931

Yeah but to not notice the leave on your shoulder and then being killed by a mere human makes you fall a bit.

>> No.32256977

Wizards here.

You're all fighters.

>> No.32256994

What a bunch of casuals.

>> No.32257626

In the Wagner version the guy who killed him was Attila the Hun. So that's pretty cool.

>> No.32257957


Oh good, someone beat me to it.


>> No.32258588

>E luck

Every fucking time

>> No.32258619

I can't tell if this is gilgamesh fighting off some lions or gilgamesh violently attacking a family of lions and choking out the alpha's wife when she comes to his aid.

The bottom lion looks sad.

>> No.32258620

I just like to think that Cuchulainn was a mutant who could actually Hulk out.

>> No.32258633

>Be a troll of such caliber that fucking buddha himself throws a mountain on you

>> No.32258634

No one laughed at your post, but they should have.

>> No.32258649

blame Bisley for that

>> No.32258683

Well, he actually literally did piss on Buddha.

>> No.32258711

Gilgamesh here. I predate all you mother fuckers and i'm the origin of you, the bible, and a ton of other shit.

I'm also a 2 deep for you philosophical tale about immortality, bro's before hoes, and how bitches be trippin. Get on my level.

>> No.32258751

Sub Bra?

>> No.32258861

>Dude, I totally pissed on my boss! He beat the shit out of me, but still!

Confirmed for collar popping dudebro; worst hero.

>> No.32259046

At one point yes, but he killed Grendal with his bare hands. He basically ripped his arm off and bet him to death with it.

Fucking Irish barbarians man.

>> No.32259090

Who is he? I'm on my phone so I can't reverse image search it.

>> No.32259178

Sun Wukong/The Monkey King.

>> No.32259179

Some awesome heroes here, that's for sure. They will still never be more famous than King Arthur. Hell, is sword alone is more famous than a lot of them.

>> No.32259205

But Siegfried is decidedly mortal.
How could he possibly measure up to Hercules?

>> No.32259276

>Sun Wukong possesses an immense amount of strength; he is able to lift his 13,500 jīn (7,960 kilograms (17,550 lb)) staff with ease. He is also extremely fast, able to travel 108,000 li (54,000 kilometres (34,000 mi)) in one somersault. Sun knows 72 transformations, which allow him to transform into various animals and objects; however, he is troubled in transforming into other forms, due to the accompanying incomplete transformation of his tail. Sun Wukong is a skilled fighter, capable of holding his own against the best warriors of heaven. Also, each of his hairs possess magical properties, capable of being transformed into clones of the Monkey King himself, and/or into various weapons, animals, and other objects. He also knows spells that can command wind, part water, conjure protective circles against demons, and freeze humans, demons, and gods alike.

Jesus christ.

>> No.32259314

Monkey king class is way OP. The heavenly emperor should have nerfed it a long time ago.

>> No.32259316

That was because Grendel had Damage Reduction/Unarmed.

>> No.32259580

Siegfried is a direct descendant of Odin.

Which makes his whole thing for Brunhilde kind of incesty, but who cares.

>> No.32259691

BLOOD AND THUNDER! Literally. Cú Chulainn's battle rage was pretty fucking brutal.

"The first warp-spasm seized Cúchulainn, and made him into a monstrous thing, hideous and shapeless, unheard of. His shanks and his joints, every knuckle and angle and organ from head to foot, shook like a tree in the flood or a reed in the stream. His body made a furious twist inside his skin, so that his feet and shins switched to the rear and his heels and calves switched to the front... On his head the temple-sinews stretched to the nape of his neck, each mighty, immense, measureless knob as big as the head of a month-old child... he sucked one eye so deep into his head that a wild crane couldn't probe it onto his cheek out of the depths of his skull; the other eye fell out along his cheek. His mouth weirdly distorted: his cheek peeled back from his jaws until the gullet appeared, his lungs and his liver flapped in his mouth and throat, his lower jaw struck the upper a lion-killing blow, and fiery flakes large as a ram's fleece reached his mouth from his throat... The hair of his head twisted like the tange of a red thornbush stuck in a gap; if a royal apple tree with all its kingly fruit were shaken above him, scarce an apple would reach the ground but each would be spiked on a bristle of his hair as it stood up on his scalp with rage."

-Thomas Kinsella

>> No.32260192

Good gravy.

>> No.32260448

That's what happens when your traded off to a warlord at a young age, receive training from a witch, meet a sect of paladins, receive a blessing from a goddess of love and war, receive a demons spear blessed and purified by yet another god, this time of witchcraft, and then sell your soul into the service of a god of pure destruction just to userp his throne for yourself. You tend to get a little twisted, even if he did come out a hero in the end.

>> No.32260539

Pre-French King Arthur was pretty fucking badass though.

>> No.32261031


Cage match dragon slayer version

Siegfried Vs Saint George, Cuchulainn Vs Heracles. Who wins?

In case George turns out to be too normal, put him against King Arthur.

Also, Roland de le France could throw down with those fellas, right?

>> No.32261088

I recommend everybody to watch Havoc in Heaven.

>> No.32261099

I think Hercules would lose but that's just me. The god-killer spear would beat Hercules. Even if he was stronger he would be less ruthless and even if he used other objects to fight, the spear, ferocity, and almost equal strength give cu chulainn an advantage

>> No.32261131


Wasn't Gae Bolg required to be thrown fom the foot after being bathes in a river though? Some weird shit with that one

Also, kinda related. Where can I find a decent book on celtic mythology? I have been looking but apparently those chucklefucks didn't write anything

>> No.32261522

There are lots of books on Celtic mythology but honestly I've traveled a lot and mostly got the stories from word of mouth. Your talking about the spear before it was purified, because it was sea monster bone it had to be dipped in water for the bristles to shoot out, but after it was blessed it could kill instantly just from a prick.

>> No.32261769


When hercules tried the same thing he just pissed of Apollo

No wonder the east is big on the peace atuff, their legends were fucking crazy

>> No.32262203

I found it pretty good.

>> No.32263389


Don't forget, they threw him into a crucible for 49 days, to be distilled by holy fire into an elixir, and he popped out not only stronger, but able to recognize evil in all it's forms.

>> No.32263876

I wish I could find a good picture of his warp spasm that isn't some rob liefield looking shit because it sounds like a truly eldritch description

I just don't understand why they kept clowning him knowing how powerful he was

like they were just inviting the jackassery that ensued.

>> No.32263900


Because he was a Monkey and they were Gods. How were they supposed to know he would kick all their asses?

>> No.32265012

>E rank luck
I thought we were above this on tg

>> No.32265124


This is the most famous of the bunch (they actually made us read this in primary school)

>> No.32265145

>12 Hours

>> No.32265222

There was one guy who could fight him to a standstill, though. Enche'er or whatever.

>> No.32267130

Holy fucking shit. That's some Lovecraftian-ass shit right there.

>> No.32267880

>that feel when the greatest heroes of your country get ruined by French Fanfiction

The Welsh are probably doubly pissed off because of English Fanfiction ruining their heroes

>> No.32268014

Just saying.

>> No.32268192

Yes, Beowulf has bad luck with weapons. It's almost Freudian.

>Woodcock ewsclest
Capacha knows what's up.

>> No.32268217

Hiawatha kicks both of their asses and then some.

>> No.32268399

>Atilla the Hun
Not quite, no. Not at all, really.

>> No.32268796

He's an anglo-saxon hero and the character is a Geat.

>> No.32269180

im no doctor, but i think somethings wrong with his left shoulder

>> No.32269548

Using a weapon that reverses the laws of cause and effect against a weapon that can essentially time travel to always strike first will do that to a demigod

>> No.32269680

To be fair, All the English did was make him King and made him not die at the end.

They didn't kick Gaiwans teeth in and make Lancelot. Literally the worst character in fiction ever,

>> No.32269704

>Not that Mary Sue Galahad

>> No.32269726

>mfw reading that sentence
How can the Japanes a) keep up with all that stuff and b) actually be interested in it?

>> No.32269733


Just so you know, King Arthur is Immortal and invunrable while he carrys Excalibur, The Sword of Victory.

He literally cannot lose while carrying Excalibur, hence when he died, he was not wielding it.

Also his Dagger can cut people in two no matter how far it is thrown and his Spear is simply known as "Slayer"

Also he was a Warlord before he was a King, As Arthur is a Celtic-Romantic mythological figure.

>> No.32269787

Galahad didn't show up, fuck Arthur's wife, Be better at jousting than Arthur, be better at swordplay than Arthur, lose Arthur's fucking sword Clarent so Mordred could get it, Refuse to fight by his side in his final battle and still acts like a supreme Ponse.

Galahad at least has the excuse of not being the singular reason why Arthur's death, formly one of fighting an uneven battle with bravery and heroism, is turned into one of an utter bitch getting stabbed in the back by his supposed best friend who is french.

>> No.32269845

>Also his Dagger can cut people in two no matter how far it is thrown
Ah, the memories...

>> No.32269853


Its actually done quite well, but yu'd most likely need to have read F/sn to get the full gist of it.

>> No.32269892

Yeah King Arthur was pretty badass Pre-French.

Because Celt-Romantic means he's fighting for Roman christian values but with Heathen understones.

Hence the magic swords, Fae and Sorceresses.

Like any good Arthurian buff, I automatically disregard everything the French added.

As it's twilight tier fanfiction compared to the Welsh and Middle English versions being Dracula.

>> No.32269915

You're assuming I give a fuck about Arthur.

Galahad upstaged my boy Peredur with his "I'm the best at everything lol destined for perfection baybee" cockmongling.

>> No.32269952


>Boasting at it's best

This is not -not- an unrealistic depiction of the Scandinavians.

>> No.32269993

Can't really complain about Galahad without using Lancelot as the root cause.

Lancelot cycle was when everything was going to utter shit and half the characters were rewritten to please the French and their shitty court political dramas.

I mean fuck, Lancelot knighted Galahad. A fucking Knight knighting his own bastard son.

>> No.32270005

He's from the Anglo-Saxon canon and the character is some kind of Swede.

>> No.32270035

Lancelot is a false knight if there ever was one.

>> No.32270046

Yep. Beowulf is actually a commentary on the culture differences between the Norse and the Anglo-Saxons. It was used to show both their cultures were pretty much exactly the same and it was mostly Kings fighting for Land, not alien cultures clashing together.

>> No.32270053

>Refuse to fight at Arthurs side
As far as i remember, Lancelot showed up for the Camlann fight but Gawain wouldn't accept his help and told him to fuck off.

>> No.32270104

Showing up late to a battle for your King is pretty much refusing to fight for Arthur isn't it?

Literally the worse Knight ever and like said above his Mary Sue son utterly destroys the feel and design of Arthurian Legend.

It goes to show you that fiction has had it's terrible remakes and Sequels all throughout history.

And never to let the french touch anything.

>> No.32270113

I thought it was Excalibur's scabbard that made him immortal and invincible?

>> No.32270130


I don't know about you, but if my best friend's definition of helping was fucking my wife, I'd tell him to fuck off too.

>> No.32270134

Well when I say Sword I include the Scabbard with it, because they're generally a two part set.

But yeah, protection powers from Scabbard, Always able to win any battle from the sword itself.

>> No.32270167

>Showing up late for a battle
>He'd been condemned as a traitor at that stage and had been living in france in exile
>Still crosses the ocean for Arthur

>> No.32270171

It's actually created a somewhat injoke with my friends and local.

If anyone ever says they like Lancelot, you can generally assume they're an asshole..

>> No.32270227

>Causes all of the problems for Arthur and generally fucks up everything
>He crosses the english fucking channel and thinks he deserves redemption for being a traitor.

Yeah, no. He didn't return for Arthur, Lancelot was a gloryhound and a rogue. He came to try and reclaim his holdings, anyone with sense would know that, Lancelot, even by the fucking french writers is painted to have no Honor.

>> No.32270255

Once And Future King was cool.

>> No.32270277

Personally it was distracting reading Morte Darthur and The Once and Future King given how much he pissed me off.

>> No.32270316

That was weird in The Once and Future King, it almost seemed at points that the author was implying his attempts to live up to his own sense of honour was what caused all the problems. Which is a rather disturbing way to portray it.

>> No.32270327

Yeah, because in the legend I heard, Arthur died because the scabbard slipped off while he was fighting, but it's worth noting that he still killed his adversary as well

>> No.32270330

Ain't that the truth.

It's all about my boy Tristan and his struggle to perform his duty against all odds.

>> No.32270362

>French write stories in English legend
>super awesome French knight shows up, NTRs Arthur and is the greatest knight ever, even God giving him the okay

Fucking French

>> No.32270369

It's pretty much the deconstruction of the actual events the character did.

He was a vainglorious rogue, The Once and Future King added reasons to this that he was an ugly and aggresive man, who tried to make up for it through knightly virtues.

But a Real Knight isn't in actions, but in their lives itself.

>> No.32270376

Sir Kay best knight

>> No.32270411

You forgot

>Has a Bastard son who is the perfect Knight, so much so only he sees the holy grail, Peredur 's sister dies because of the journey and he basically says "I want to die now because I am the best" and Angels carry him to heaven, with Peredur watching just to show how a character steeped in Celtic and Arthurian Legend is shit compared to the French addition.

>> No.32270417

Oh and they made Gawain a bad knight and a drunk because Gawain had a 5 pointed star on his shield so he was totally pagan Amirite?

>> No.32270431


Thank you.

Peredur is suffering.

>> No.32270454

Try to keep up with some shit in cape comics.

>> No.32270501


Only the french were ever so blatantly willing to jerk themselves off all over someone else's mythology like that. I literally cannot think of another culture that just sat down and took a huge arrogant dump all over another's stories and proclaimed it the best thing ever.

>> No.32270524

I've always loved how the Monty Python version of Lancelot is pretty fucking accurate to the original story.

>> No.32270544

Not even fucking Christianity did that, and pre-french Arthurian Legend is proof of that.

Christianity sets itself up as the sequel to many religions like Celtic and Norse.

The French run ramshod over it because they fucking ignored their own shit.

>> No.32270614

The Romans took a huge dump on Greek mythology as well.

>> No.32270697

Really? Because from what I can remember it was just a bunch of copy pasted 'find and replace "Zeus" with "Jupiter"' and all that. I don't remember any myth where a true blooded equites noble personification of Roman culture went to Greece and served Leonidas in his phalanx, managing to fuck his wife and lead his army better than he ever could, right before getting him killed.

>> No.32271514

What, the Alan mythological hero?

>> No.32271545

They stole Buddha and claimed Confucius was muslim.

>> No.32271604

Wasn't that just the Ahmadiyyas? As I understand it, they have a lot of weird beliefs and are generally the whipping boys of Islam.

>> No.32271701

Secundus hic est

>> No.32271931

>/Fate/ Stay Night
Every time.

>> No.32272028

From left to right

Francis Drake
Lu Bu
Robin Hood
Nursery Rhyme, basically an amalgamation of all the nursery rhymes
Vlad the implier

>> No.32272053


If only those fucking faggots would /stay on /a/

>> No.32272080

>Sir Francis Drake is a busty piratess without pants or a shirt
>the culmination of all folktales and nursery rhymes is a little girl wearing a hoodie-dress
>Vlad the Impaler is an edgy knight with a clown instead of an unscrupulous ruler

>> No.32272119

The clown is his Master.

And he's only an Edgy Vampire Knight because of his surrounding legends. It's noted that it's not strictly accurate, but magically enforced preconception.

>> No.32272167

Then why is Saber a girl?

>> No.32272174

Why would people assume that he'd personally mounted all those Turks on pikes and burned all those hobos? This is below Fables levels of deliberate bastardization of folklore, and that was a cape comic!

>> No.32272194

Because the fast-track to money in Japan is releasing a porn game?

Seriously, porn games are like the exact opposite of financial suicide in Japan.

>> No.32272200

If he were true to his surrounding legends he'd look far more like Dracula from Symphony of the Night than some general Blackguard.

>> No.32272217

Because Nasu got no balls and changed her from the original male design.

>> No.32272224

Nah, the part where he's a blood-drinking edgemaster.

Vlad Dracula is inherently associated with the vampire myth, and that colors the summoning because you're not getting the mythological figure themselves, you're getting the general idea of them shoved into a magical doll. Excaliber shoots lasers, dude.

>> No.32272256

Not only is Francis Drake a woman, she is also in lesbians with the queen. History remembers her as a man because she disguised her gender to avoid embarrassing her lover.

>> No.32272304

>Francis drake is a busty pirate
there were a bunch o legends that drake was a cross dressed queen liz. Thats whats it implying
>Culmination of all folktales and rhymes is a little girl
the gist is that it can take on the image off anyone in that case, it's master was the virtual ghost of a dead girl who was lonely, so it shapeshifted to be her twin
>Bad Vlad
He's under the effect of the 'Innocent Monster' skill, which basically means that he has to act like the propaganda described him as being. Read Apoc for a more sympathetic Vlad see >>32265012

His only wish is that the whole dracula thing be wiped out, so basically people can make their own mind up about how he ruled and what he did.

>> No.32272307


>Meet a nice Japanese girl
>Take her out on a couple dates
>She is super into me
>Take her home after a date
>Start making gentle love to her
>Switch it up, pin her down start being rough
>Call her a whore and a bitch
>Tell her to never come back
>She leaves in tears
>A few days letter texts me asking why I was so mean
>"Tell your shit country to stop making Anime"

>tfw no gf

>> No.32272310

Wait, if these are the popular perception of these people stuffed into dolls as >>32272224 says, than it wouldn't matter if she were a woman because the popular idea is of her as a man.

>> No.32272346

Except there are myths of her being a cross-dressed noble, as mentioned.

Also, it's the spirit but twisted by the myth.

So it IS Vlad... but it's Vlad being twisted by the myth of Vlad-as-Dracula

>> No.32272367


Japan just wants women to rape with tentacles.

>> No.32272412

If they have the Innocent monster skill, then the legend can warp their apperance, (at the moment i think this is limited to Vlad and liz bathory, might be somone im forgetting)

Apoc has a vlad who's not under the effects of innocent monster and he's a strict ruler, but a reasonable one as well.

Basically they are always summoned at their top condition otherwise.

>> No.32272431

>They're all going to laugh at you! They're all going to laugh at you! They're all going to laugh at you!

>> No.32272460

>laughing Arthur Pendragon

>> No.32272484

Fuck just remembered Hans Andersen has it as well.

>> No.32272755

The sword is more famous than the guy who wielded it
There are people who know Excalibur, but not King Arthur
It's kinda sad

>> No.32272845

Oh and I got my ass handed to me by a guy who needs step-by-step instructions on how to put "tab a" in "slot b."

>> No.32272887


Fables a shit

>> No.32272919

Naw Excalibur and Avalon together made him super ace. Ultra sword and shield.

>> No.32273045

>Japan will never make a shitty anime that features you as a qt girl

>> No.32273113


You know who the *best* character in King Arthur's stories was?


>> No.32273152


>Not Morgan la Fay

Check your misogyny shit lord!

>> No.32273417

>step-by-step instructions on how to put "tab a" in "slot b."

>> No.32273434

>Not Uther
I am ashamed of you all

>> No.32273454


I don't remember Uther bonking a descendent of Jesus on the head and initiate a Whacky Chase Scene before blowing up a castle.

>> No.32273462

The Epic of Gilgamesh was the world's first PSA.
>this, children, is how to have sex

>> No.32273492

no but you can buy an occulus rift, an onahole, and a PCI card controlled robotic arm and fuck a virtual reality miku

i mean, they're pretty close to putting you in an anime. it's just that it's still in the porn industry state of "new technology we must experiment with"

>> No.32273561

Please put your...That! Y...Your pOnOs(a) to my... my herre! ...My vagOOO
and j... j-jam it in!

>> No.32273643

"Sing, O goddess, the anger of Achilles son of Peleus, that brought
countless ills upon the Achaeans. Many a brave soul did it send
hurrying down to Hades, and many a hero did it yield a prey to dogs
and vultures"

>> No.32273680


>> No.32273712

You lost me.

>> No.32273809


>> No.32273960


Balin is a knight that killed the Lady of the Lake right when she entered King Arthur's Court, took a sword from a lady who *explicitly mentioned* it was cursed, and was fated to deliver the Dolorous Stroke, which is a Chaos Dunk-grade disaster.

His entire adventure consists of killing knights, watching the conveniently nearby ladies of said knights discover their corpses and fall on their lover's blades, and getting harassed by an invisible motherfucker that was slaying his followers. He eventually finds the invisible guy at a feast, kills him, and discovers killing a guest (and the host's brother) at a dinner party is a bad idea. Balin draws his blade to defend himself, slams the sword down on the host's head, and the blade promptly explodes into a thousand pieces.

Cue a paragraph which is quite literally Balin running throughout the castle, looking for a weapon while the host gives chase. Balin eventually comes across some random room filled with gold, picks up a spear, and stabs the host. Turns out the host is part of the group protecting the Holy Grail, and the spear he used was the Spear of Destiny. This activates the Dolorous Stroke and causes the castle to blow up (oh, forgot to mention that the Holy Grail was in that room, the explosion rocketed it away.) Merlin comes along and picks Balin out of the wreckage, tells him he's a stupid cunt, and scampers off.

Balin wanders the countryside and notices his killing of Jesus Dude, along with the Dolorous Stroke, has left the kingdom a plague, famine-infested shithole. Eventually he comes across a knight on an island, and in typical Balin fashion duels him.

Turns out the knight was Balin's brother! Of course neither knew that until both were mortally wounded, so the pair die. Balin's Cursed Sword is lost to the currents, washes up on a beach, and Merlin comes along to take the magical pommel from the sword for... Reasons, I think it's used for Galahad.

Thus was the story of Balin!

>> No.32274015



>> No.32274052


Sounds like an adventurer to me!

>> No.32274277

Odysseus here, you're a prissy little bint who lost his fucktoy to a bigger bully.

Go cry in your tent some more you literal faggot. Seriously what was UP with you and Patroclus? Kid's your NEPHEW, you incestous fuck!

>> No.32274450

Diomedes here, like you're any better, you glory-greedy lost-ass motherfucker?

What's it like getting lost in the fucking Aegean for 20 years? Remind me, how many random chicks How's Calypso, Nausicaa, Circe, and, oh yeah, YOUR WIFE, Penelope?

>> No.32274616


The only real change over I can think of is that Hades wasn't seen as evil/malicious in Greek religion, but Pluto was a menacing/Evil God in Roman religion.

>> No.32274636

His wife NTRd him with his favorite apprentice and tried to steal his magic immortal shit from the gods.

>> No.32274767

OOOOOOOH. Name-calling and criticizing my love-life. So THAT'S what happens when you're so old you can't hold up a spear any more…

Just because you partied with my grandad in the old days does NOT mean I have to listen to your incessant screeching about how the wine was better back home. TEN FUCKING YEARS of your complaining, it ain't no WONDER I didn't get back to Greece for a whole nother decade. Sides, demigoddess ass is most excellently tapped. By me.

Not to mention the fact that I WON THE FUCKING WAR. By myself, my plan, my execution, Trojans lose, I'm rich.

Oh and by the way Athena called: she said sorry for dressing up as you, stealing your glory and then wrecking your ride.

>> No.32274884


>Could not keep it in his pants
>Wants one of his men's wife so badly that he has a wizard make him look like the dude, since rape by deception is the only way he can get laid
>Basically fucks his whole kingdom in the process

Sorry, not the best character. I think you meant to say Gawain.

>> No.32275033


Behold! Sir Balin The Fuck Up! Boldest of Arthur's Knights!

>> No.32275125

Remember though that the nemean lion pelt cannot be pierced, which gives Hercules some pretty good defense against that spear.

>> No.32275357

Hektor here

You're all dicks, please go home

>> No.32275390

Christ is there anyone or thing japan won't turn into a cutesy anime girl?

>> No.32275502


I feel the Warp overtaking me?

>> No.32275553


>> No.32275584

Pretty much this. It's implied that the Francis Drake you summon is actually Queen Elizabeth, who swapped places with Francis Drake after getting a rather unfortunate scar across her face - that sort of thing makes it hard to hide your secret hobby.

>> No.32275855

>tfw defeating Rider and Shinji dying
>tfw you realize you just murdered an 8 year old kid

>> No.32275860

Joke's on you, Mr. Condom Brand. How's it feel being so epically dead that your own descendants forget who you are?

>> No.32276053


>> No.32276164

Pretty good, actually. Apparently, I'm directly related to over half of Britain's nobility circa 1830.

>> No.32276216

There must have more.

>> No.32276275

So, if they're directly altered by popular interpretations, why is Francis Drake still Queen Elizabeth? Was it an absurdly popular rumor that "Sir" Francis Drake was actually Queen Elizabeth in disguise at the time?

>> No.32276397

Usually they aren't directly influenced overly much by popular perception. The Innocent Monster skill that has been mentioned before is what specifies that a misconception by the public has 'tainted' the Heroic Spirit (why Vlad the Impaler has vampiric traits, for a notable example).

Given the way that the Moon Cell works, evidently in the setting of Fate/EXTRA, Queen Elizabeth actually DID do at least some of the things that Francis Drake was famed for, during their games of 'pretend to be one another'.

Every now and then, you find that some details about a Heroic Spirit in life are a bit off from how they are commonly remembered in legend (most notably, the examples of some females being remembered in legend as males).

>> No.32276439

I know for a fact that there's one for Mengele, because I've seen it in the past. I don't have it saved though.

>> No.32277242

Tiresias here

Who's fucking magical realm is responsible for this BULLSHIT?

Someone wanna field that?

>> No.32277260

Oh, and the fact that Kojiro Sasaki apparently DOESN'T EXIST. But the Tsubame Gaeshi was a real technique invented by a DIFFERENT samurai who never got his name written in the history books, so that guy accidentally became 'Sasaki Kojiro' because he was the nearest equivalent when someone tried to summon him.

>> No.32277448

This one's actually pretty easy, if it goes the way I think.

See, Hector was related to Aeneas, (though not actually "directly") a prince of Troy who escaped and became one of the founders of Rome, according to Virgil.

Rome, later, conquers Britain*, and founds Londinium, which eventually becomes London.

So it's not impossible for English nobles to claim Roman, and moreover Trojan, blood.

Then again, I can just as easily claim to be descended from the High Kings of Ireland because that's what a gypsy at a carnival told me the origin of my last name was.

And I do.

*- "conquered" meaning here "gave up on Scotland and Ireland, and the fucking Picts, and just built a wall.

>> No.32277649

ITT: /tg/ in its truest most condensed form
i love you guys.

>> No.32277671

>Not getting the Tiresias reference

"On Mount Cyllene in the Peloponnese, as Tiresias came upon a pair of copulating snakes, he hit the pair a smart blow with his stick. Hera was not pleased, and she punished Tiresias by transforming him into a woman. As a woman, Tiresias became a priestess of Hera, married and had children, including Manto, who also possessed the gift of prophecy. According to some versions of the tale, Lady Tiresias was a prostitute of great renown. After seven years as a woman, Tiresias again found mating snakes; depending on the myth, either she made sure to leave the snakes alone this time, or, according to Hyginus, trampled on them.[4] As a result, Tiresias was released from his sentence and permitted to regain his masculinity."

>> No.32277831


And later was questioned by Zeus who experienced more pleasure from sex, for Zeus was quarreling with Hera, and he said the woman, and so Hera struck him blind. Zeus, in return for his fair judgement, gave him prophecy.

With this gift, he later advised several prominent Grecians, including Oedipus and Creon.

I know who you are, you blind fuck. And maybe, if you hadn't decided to tell my dad he was nailing his mom so bluntly, he wouldn't have quit, I wouldn't have killed my brother while he killed me, my sister wouldn't have buried him, my uncle wouldn't have had her entombed, and his son and wife wouldn't have killed themselves. YOU KILLED MY FAMILY YOU GENDERBENDING FREAKSHOW. I'LL KILL YOU LIKE I KILLED POLYNICES, OR MY NAME ISN'T ETEOCLES.

I thought you literally wanted the information, so I broke character.

>> No.32277868

Okay, you know what?

That's fair.

On the other hand, you're the inbred son of a literal motherfucker.

Nobody ended up with a Tiresias Complex.

>> No.32277921

>be saxon scum
>steal a country
>dispossess its native inhabitants
>steal their hero who dedicated his life to defending them from Saxon scum
>we English nao
>original mythology do not steal

>> No.32277934


>> No.32278129

Hagen wasn't atilla. In the ring cycle this barbarian king named like...Aitsle or something shows up and marries the vengeful woman.

Forgive my lack of names, it's literally been over 10 years since i've read it.

>> No.32278265

Fate/extra saber? Because while born in a male body the soul of the hero itself identified as female - tl;dr soul-gender-reassignment.

>> No.32278307

Also in Nero's case there's apparently an in-joke there about some sort of genetic relationship between the Roman Emperors and King Arthur, ergo why the two Sabers look mostly identical.

>> No.32279097


So what can be taken from rhis is that the French can't not fyck up legends to save their lives, and the greeks have bitchfights constantly between themselves and the romans

Wasn't Roland a cool guy tho? Cutting canyons in the earth and ain't afraid of anything

>> No.32279117


Fuck, didn't mean to quote

>> No.32279130

>no spear

Whoever this artist is, they're shit in more ways than just art style

>> No.32279365

My brain hurts. So the weapon strikes way later than it was supposed to, then?

>> No.32279390

pretty much.

>> No.32279394

It's complicated. Basically, Gae Bolg reverses cause and effect - it's a sure-kill weapon because it decides if it killed a guy or not before you even throw it.

Meanwhile the other weapon always strikes first - so it decided to hit Cu Chulainn before Gae Bolg decided to hit the other guy and had Cu Chulainn throw it which fucked up Cu Chulainn's throw which caused Gae Bolg to miss even though it had decided to hit.

>> No.32279497



But hr could literaly throw that shit towards the ground or the opponent's feet and it'd still hit, how the fuck a shoulder wound messed that up??

>> No.32279594

Time travel in that setting seems to be sometimes exempt from the laws of cause and effect.

>> No.32279807

Wait a second here... He did this every time he rage'd out? And then returned to looking like a normal human? That must put him well into the range of serious magic or supernatural influences, which means he fits into a different category entirely from "merely" extremely strong/smart/skilled within conventional human capacity heroes. No normal human could survive that transformation. Or benefit from it all.

>> No.32279973

Herakles is by far the most badass of heroes.

No, Siegfried. You gutted a single dragon. Herakles did more than that before breakfast.

>> No.32280163


I support this claim, the amount of crazy shit Herakles did was insane.

>Held up the whole universe

>> No.32280174

are you guys talking about fate?

>> No.32280211

it was a general mythology thread but Type-Moon inserts itself everywhere so whatever

>> No.32280534


Well Siegfried also broke Gungnir in half, boned a valkyrie, told Odin to go fuck himself and rode a horsr through a ring of fire, not necessarily in that order

Also, his father could turn into a wolf. That's pretty cool. Sigmund was a cool guy.

>> No.32280536

Fragarach is fired like a thin beam of light the size of a marble and can only be used upon the activation of an enemies trump card, usually it would rewrite the events that happened so that it hit first, which would usually kill the opponent, and negate any further actions they had taken as they'd already be dead after fraggers hits them.

However with the bolg, its already hit upon activation so once fragarch changes events so that its hits first, the bolg has still been activated and therefore has already hit, the hit knocks her arm/aim skyward, so that beam that has hit his heart follows and cleaves through his shoulder.

Cu has the battle continuation (due to his legend of tying himself to a tree with his own intestines to keep fighting) so he can stick around for a few seconds despite being rightly fucked.

I think its already been posted but this is the scene in question

>> No.32280584

They also made Ares/Mars not a bitch or a psycho. They basically took Athena's War bits and stapled it onto Ares and made him the god of War. All of it.

>> No.32280616


The Legend of Sigmund was so much cooler than Siegfried's. Maybe because he was not, for a change, a complete asshole. All he wanted was to bone his sister

>> No.32280849

>That feel when interested by mythology and legendary epics
>So many cool stories and shit I don't even have the faintest fucking clue where to even begin
>Sit around not reading anything at all


Gib media that is good entry level mythological epic material plos

>> No.32280876


Start with greek and nordic, go up from there

>> No.32280881


Le Morte d'Arthur
Táin Bó Cúailnge

>> No.32280886

You know the guys name is Sigurd not Siegfried.

>> No.32280896

Know that feel. A few days ago I wanted to read up on Chonindo. Nothing. A dictionary definition and a two sentence wikipedia article. That is all.

It took over a day to find anything with more info. The frustration of being interested but there being a lack of knowledge is one of the worst things in existence.

>> No.32280979 [DELETED] 


It's getting to the point where I'm almost ready to swallow the Nasu pill and watch/read some Fate media because there are so few modern or readily accessible media with that kind of mythological bent to it

And I hate Nasu. I will never get those hours I spent on Tsukihime back. Goddamnit

>> No.32280991

Tastes and slaps as they say it around here. You could read American Gods, perhaps you'd like that.

>> No.32280992


It's getting to the point where I'm almost ready to swallow the Nasu pill and watch/read some Fate media because there are so few modern or readily accessible media with that kind of mythological bent to it

And I hate Nasu. I will never get those hours I spent on Tsukihime back. Goddamnit

>>32280881 and >>32265124 are helpful though, so thanks for that

>> No.32281012

Also the greek classics. You know, Odyssey and whatnot.

>> No.32281037



I-I don't suppose there's slightly more modern versions that make the content more easily.. digestable?

>> No.32281049

Greek and Roman writers like the Odysse or Aeneas as has been mentioned, fables and Beowulf come to mind.

I'd also recommend this for anybody looking for inspirations or is just interested in the topic in general.
Also lists deities/god by symbols associated with them. So if you are looking for an idea for a good of ...smithing for example you can just look it up and compare.

>> No.32281074

title in english

>more easily.. digestable?
You can read a modern translation? The language will actually be easier to understand than some Shakespearean English...

>> No.32282834


What's important about E rank luck? Heroes always got shit lives

>> No.32282956

Gatotkaca was here

Come back after you took a nuke with your abdomen so that your king can win the war

>> No.32282976

Because bad things always happen to Lancers. This is attributed to their class having E rank luck as the base, despite that being fairly common and only Casters reaching B.

>> No.32283145

Its a Lancer thing

Example Cu Has his master killed before the war even starts, his replacement master uses him as a scout and won't let him fight seriously/kill his opponents (Cu's wish was just to be able to fight fuckers), he ge

Diarmuid Only wants to be his masters loyal knight, but his master distrusts him because of his legend, which is justified as his masters wife goes psycho for him, she then tortures the master into transfering the mastership over to her so she can and him can get together. Despite this Diarmuid still claims his allegence is to his other master and won't touch her. He dies when his original master commands him to kill himself, Diarmuid dies crying and cursing everyone around him for crushing his wish

Vlad Vlads wish is to remove the connection between him and dracula from history so that people will judge him by his own actions regardless of how they see his actions defending his homeland. One of his Noble Phantasms is to take on the form of the vampire of his legend (Which is an extremely powerful NP as it lets him fight 6 servants at once (including Karna and Achilles) to a draw), however Vlad states that he'll never use it and forcing him to do it would be an extremely bad idea. Long story short his master forces him to use it at one stage and he then gets killed as the form makes him weak to holy shit, he too dies crying and whatnot

>> No.32283326

FUCKING LOVE that book of The Tain. Seriously, it's the most accurate and direct translation there is, and it reads like an 80s anime.

>> No.32283333

What's going on here?

>> No.32283338


Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Guess it is to balance the fact that Lancers are always the beat damn characters around

Fucking Diarmuid man....He deserved better, god damn it.

>> No.32283353

Siegfried was inbred as fuck. He better do something to make up for that...

>> No.32283439

Please stick to straight mythology talk. Fate is to folktales as Percy Jackson is to classical mythology.

>> No.32283495


Fate is considerably more accurate, appearances aside.

>> No.32283566

>Apperances aside
Are you seriously impling that king Arthur wasn't really a girl ?

>> No.32283576

His father was the sun god Lugh, who was in turn half human/Celt and half giant land-walking sea monster/femori. Lugh achieved a god-like status due to being such a fucking badass. His great grandfather was Balor, a TOWERING monster with one leg, one arm and a cycloptic eye that could kill you by looking at you.

Cúchulainn inherited traits from his father and great-grandfather. Before going into this warp-spasm, he was already ridiculously strong, agile and knew a couple magic spells on top of owning a magic spear. He'd fall into this state when he went full berserk. The only way to force him out of it was, get ready; to get a hot chick to flash her tits then force him into 3 cauldrons of freezing water.

>> No.32283598

It's still, at its very essence, an eroge turned shounen series. I wouldn't discuss Ah, My Goddess! if we were discussing the concept of a trio of Fates, so discussing how what is effectively a Stand similar to an old hero is justified is pretty low on the "is this related to old heroes?" question you should be asking yourself.

>> No.32283641


Are you seriously implying King Arthur's gender was that important to his legend? King Arthur is practically asexual. If it weren't for Mordred, he may as well not have genitalia at all.


That seems off the point, considering the characters in Fate are functionally intended to be the characters of legend, and are as close to the myth as possible beyond appearances.

>> No.32283688

When you're discussing these characters as if they were in Fate, you're discussing them as they appeared in the Fate games/anime/mangas, not how they appeared in the original myth. Why not just talk about their original appearance?

>> No.32283704

this painting is kind of hilarious if you imagine that the dragon was just chillin. Just look at his grin.

>> No.32283721


Or their historical background.. which is their original appearance.
What I'm saying is there's little difference as in the circumstance of Fate, they're the same

>> No.32283735

Alright, so why are you still talking about them through the Fate filter? Just talk about their historical background as interpreted by its origin culture, not by the refreshingly faithful interpretation by the Japanese?

>> No.32283748

>Are you seriously implying King Arthur's gender was that important to his legend? King Arthur is practically asexual. If it weren't for Mordred, he may as well not have genitalia at all.

Alright, I'll bite this mound of supreme stupidity.

Fate is based off of French fanfiction revision Arthurian Legend. Ergo, a majority of the theme around it is the idea of sirehood and unfaithfulness.

Arthur was always trying to sire a son, while his wife was always getting boned by Lancelot. So seeing as Fate is Weebshit designed around the Ouibshit story of King Arthur, making Arthur a woman totally destroys the point of the legend.

Actually, even Celtic influences show his masculinity is paramount.

King Arthur as a woman doesn't work, hence why Fate is fucking garbo.

>> No.32283756

>Refreshing faithful interpretation
>Everyone is a moeblob, Cloud, or a Bara.

Not a single one of the fucking represented heroes is accurate at all.

>> No.32283797

As I remember it, it was a bit more than just flashing him. You had to mob him with naked women and then have them manhandle him into the cauldrons. The first one explodes from the sheer heat of his rage, the water all evaporates from the second, and the third one only becomes piping hot, by which time Cu Chulainn has calmed down.

Yeah, Alexander mentioned that one off-hand, when his Master complained about that. Basically, the books don't always get all the details right.

>> No.32283816

>Arthur was always trying to sire a son, while his wife was always getting boned by Lancelot. So seeing as Fate is Weebshit designed around the Ouibshit story of King Arthur, making Arthur a woman totally destroys the point of the legend.

Except depending on the legend, Arthur either didn't really give a fuck about Lancelot and only responded because he was legally obligated, or actively encouraged it because he didn't care about Guinevere at all.
Which fits perfectly in Fate because a female Arthur has no reason to care about Guinevere.

>> No.32283859

So, it's a faithful interpretation but

>Books get it wrong and the heroes look totally different.


>They get changed to look like popular culture because of some spell clause.

Yeah, you can't have both and still call yourself a faithful interpretation.

Same reason why Gilgamesh has a fucking spaceship and uses tons of swords.

Except, you know, Banishing Lancelot for it from the British Isles because the slimey French cunt was a horrible knight and King Arthur's greatest thorn in his side, Oh wait, Fate has them as forlorn friends doesn't it?

>> No.32283862

>Arthur was always trying to sire a son
That's one of those huge warning claxons that screams "DEPENDING ON THE TELLING", as in other myths Arthur was trying desperately to avoid having children having heard a prophecy that he will be slain by his own son.

>> No.32283887

>Except, you know, Banishing Lancelot for it from the British Isles because the slimey French cunt was a horrible knight and King Arthur's greatest thorn in his side
Another one of those depending-on-who's-telling things.
Other interpretations was that he was a stellar knight and unparalleled warrior whose urge to give the D was simply too strong.

>> No.32283910

The whole SON thing is still a reoccurring theme though, Male positions in Monarchy and so forth, just like with Arthur and Uther.

Slapping tits on Arthur and making him a moeblob destroys this underlying theme.

Every single representation of Lancelot is one of a vainglorious bastard who ruined everything due to Hubris. The very fact that it uses the French version of Arthurian Legend is another perfect reason to utterly disregard Fate as the horrible inaccurate pile of shit it is.

>> No.32283916

A lot of the tellings that involve Arthur failing to get retribution for his cuckolding do it because Arthur was unusually ill during that time. He was so weak, that he could barely finish a feast without retiring to his chambers for a long nap.

>> No.32283967

>The whole SON thing is still a reoccurring theme though, Male positions in Monarchy and so forth, just like with Arthur and Uther.
The problem with that is that the position of rulership is technically gender neutral, as is the position of inheritor.
Making it obligated to be male is, well, simply a thing of precedent rather than an absolute necessity.

>> No.32284009

>The fact it uses the french version
Nearly everybody uses the damn french version as its the most well known, throwing it back to to him being some sort of roman commander who goes apocolypse now on the locals would have been pointless.

>> No.32284063

>roman commander who goes apocolypse now on the locals would have been pointless

This is the command of the source material Fate fans have.

It's hilariously disgusting. Stop talking about Mythological and Historical heroes when your knowledge of them resorts to drivel even Hollywood move away from.

Just to educate your scum sucking brain. He was never "Going apocolypse now" on the locals." In any representation, even that Movie. He was always a Briton-Roman Warlord saving the isles from the Saxons. You uncultured filth.

>> No.32284064

It requires that the nobility of that era be completely blind, considering the fact that Arthur is a very gorgeous lady in Fate. It's the same thing with Francis Drake, which also brings to mind the concept that the enlightened ruler of England would decide to throw away the throne because she got a scar across her face.

>> No.32284078

>Celtic or Middle ages seats of power
>Gender neutral.

I guess thats why Kings always wanted a Son right? Pure fucking preference?

>> No.32284090


Arthur was barely ever seen by the "nobility" and it was implied the knights of the round could mostly figure it out but said nothing out of respect.
The Francis Drake/Elizabeth thing isn't totally canon anyway.

>> No.32284098

So... why IS Francis Drake a woman?

>> No.32284112


Yes, and a matter of precedent.
They didn't want daughters because that's not how it was done, not because of some cosmic principle that the ruler can only be male.

>> No.32284147

But Fate's Lancelot IS a vainglorious asshole who fucked over Arthur.

That's why he's a Berserker, because he's a madhouse shit-head who flew into killing rages and couldn't get over the fact that Arthur didn't give a fuck about him even after he NTR'd her.

>> No.32284157


Because the Moon Cell is a data construct and a servant gets to look like what they want.
This mannequin-thing is what they ACTUALLY look like beneath the data image.

>> No.32284159

Ah, so Fate assumes it's own things and then you say it's accurate?

How the fuck could a king who ruled a kingdom of knights and nobility, sitting at a round table hosting feasts NOT be discovered as a woman.

I feel like I am arguing with a SJW now. Having a son ensured during the marriage YOUR Bloodline carries on it's name and dominance. Unlike with a Daughter.

>> No.32284192


Which again is only a matter of precedence.
There's no cosmic principle also stating that women have to take the name of their husband, only legal principles.

>> No.32284200

So Fate's Arthurian legend is basically a three way love triangle shit about raging faglords and Moe moe grils.?

Instead of the ideal chivalrous kingdom being brought down by the frailties of men that show how loyalty to your lord is paramount?

>B-but it's totally accurate guys!

>> No.32284215

A bunch of people knew, but said nothing so they wouldn't shake things up.

>> No.32284219

>Instead of the ideal chivalrous kingdom being brought down by the frailties of men that show how loyalty to your lord is paramount?

But that's exactly what it was.
Mordred was only able to turn the country against Arthur because everyone but Arthur were idiotic mortals who didn't realize their king was perfect and some fuck-off knight banging the queen was no real issue.

>> No.32284226

The round table did know.
But how destabilising to a country under constant siege do you think it would be if their God-given King and supposed greatest military commander looked like a 14 year old girl for all her life?
There'd be fucking rebellions out the wazoo.

The round table just had the sense to damage control and keep it as quiet as possible.

>> No.32284243

So, Sir Francis Drake, the amazing pirate explorer, was a trans* woman all this time?

>> No.32284254

Nah it's basically just Lancelot being a shitter.

>Lancelot is jealous of Arthur's totally pure pureness because he'll never be as perfect a knight
>Fucks Arthur's wife thinking 'yeah he'll totally be MAX PISSED now and we can duke it out like knights it'll be fucking rad I'm so goddamn cool'
>Arthur doesn't give a fuck, just tells him to leave
>Lancelot realizes he's a humongous fucking douche, but still blames Arthur for being so goddamn virtuous that it pisses him off
>Storms off, loses Clarent, all that shit
>Feels bad and comes back to help Arthur, except Arthur is already dead

>> No.32284255

>Only legal principles.

Just like there is no matter of precedence of their being a leader of a kingdom period then right? Only legal principles, and those Legal principles were.....

Women take the name of the man, and that kings are above Queens.

Go queef somewhere else about your Female King Arthur you SJW cuntscraper.


So nobody at all noticed King Arthur was a 5"1 Blonde haired girl with breastplate armor? Nobody in the entire kingdom. Here is the kicker then.

You know what would have made sure this shit didn't happen? IF KING ARTHUR WASNT A FUCKING GIRL IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Without that pathetic, pointless twist, you would not need all these stupid leaps of logic.

>> No.32284265


>So Fate's Arthurian legend is basically a three way love triangle shit about raging faglords and Moe moe grils.?

So in other words your complaining about something you haven't read ?

>> No.32284267


Or maybe he liked Elizabeth's appearance so much that he wanted to bear it. Or maybe he liked boobies so much he wanted the biggest. He dies too fast to comment.

>> No.32284275

We'll never know, he's the first one you murder.

Hell, his Master is a 1337 haxxor for an 8 year old, maybe he did it on purpose to obfuscate his Servant's identity (or because he loves tits)

>> No.32284284

Yeah, except Arthur is a girl and tons of romatnic undertones are injected in there about Arthur actually caring about Lancelot.

Oh I have read it, It's fucking garbage and exactly zero of it's representations are accurate to the source material. Even fucking Lu Bu.

>> No.32284308

>Just like there is no matter of precedence of their being a leader of a kingdom period then right? Only legal principles, and those Legal principles were.....

King Arthur is above legality. Drawing the sword of selection from the stone makes you king, whether you have a dick doesn't come up.

>So nobody at all noticed King Arthur was a 5"1 Blonde haired girl with breastplate armor? Nobody in the entire kingdom.

She was on the battlefield more than often than she was in Camelot. Her people didn't get very many good looks at her, ever, and when they did they saw what they wanted to see.
>with breastplate armor?
Nigger what her armor is completely gender neutral.

>Without that pathetic, pointless twist, you would not need all these stupid leaps of logic.

They all add up to be very minor, though. The legend et al is basically unchanged. Everything about Camelot and the knights of the round table remains unchanged in the change of Arthur's dick.

>> No.32284312

>liking vikings and Norse mythology

Boring, overdone, over-saturated, move onto something else. I'm sick of muh honour and muh glory. The second I see thinly veiled stand in viking cultures in a frozen north in fantasy, I roll my fucking eyes.

>inb4 hipster and/or faggot

>> No.32284328

>Yeah, except Arthur is a girl and tons of romatnic undertones are injected in there about Arthur actually caring about Lancelot.

... yeah you've never read it.
Arturia had no love at all for anyone anywhere. Until Shirou came along and told her to "BE A GIRL FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE" she lived entirely without emotion, acting solely to be a perfect king.

>> No.32284336

>implying you wouldn't a Loki dick

>> No.32284341

Those are after the fact. A lot of Zero is about ideals. The 'romantic' bit you picked up is Arthur realizing that she HAD set the bar impossibly high and by refusing to relate to the men under her and setting herself apart she kind of fucked them up. That's not 'maybe I really did care about Lancelot' that's 'Wow, this guy has fucking issues, how did I not NOTICE that? Maybe I'm not the Perfect King I thought I was'

It's a reflection on the previous conversation between her and Alexander/Gilgamesh, over whether a King needs to be bound to morality or not. She argued that her virtue was the most important thing because it gave her the right to rule, whereas Alexander says that it's far more necessary to provide an example to your people so that they can have dreams of their own.

>> No.32284350

If i remember right, in fate when he returns to britain Gawain sends him away, and in Apoc Gawain dies when Mordred storms dover, so he's Arthurs still alive when he returns

>> No.32284361

Fuckin' Gawain

What a shit

Hated fighting that motherfucker.


>> No.32284407

>King Arthur is above legality. Drawing the sword of selection from the stone makes you king, whether you have a dick doesn't come up.

Why does she hide herself as a Man then?

>She was on the battlefield more than often than she was in Camelot. Her people didn't get very many good looks at her, ever, and when they did they saw what they wanted to see.

Why did none of her soldiers notice she was the smallest person on the battlefield?

>Nigger what her armor is completely gender neutral.

It has boob room, it's also a fucking frilly dress.

>They all add up to be very minor, though. The legend et al is basically unchanged. Everything about Camelot and the knights of the round table remains unchanged in the change of Arthur's dick.

Sure, but you can't call it an accurate representation then can you when you change a FUNDAMENTAL THEME OF THE STORY.

Yeah, no. Stop sugar coating it. It's about a Moeblob fighting Japanese media tropes with vaguely Mythological overtones. You directly pointed out how fucking shit fate represents the story.

It questions King Arthur and if he was a BAD King. Not that it questions LANCELOT and that he was a bad knight.

That is the point of Lancelot and his dynamic. HE WAS A BAD KNIGHT.

>> No.32284434

>It's about the flaws of men!
>But not King Arthur King Arthur can't be a flawed character baaawww

>> No.32284453

>implying I positively care about Norse mythology in any way
>implying it's interesting and not brimming with edgy teenagers, modern 'pagans' and uncomfortable levels of fevered nationalism
>implying past that it isn't just a plain and boring messed-up wreck

Other mythologies exist that are far more interesting than muh draggins and glory. That being said, most mythologies are unfortunately saturated with honour and glory shit.

>> No.32284457

You clearly don't know what a moeblob is.

>> No.32284474

Thats exactly the point of the King Arthur Story.

King Arthur was the perfect King, the Anchorpoint for all Kings to strive for. His Knights were examples of HOW TO, and HOW NOT TO, serve your lord.

>Honor and glory

Looks like we have an edgelord here.

I know it pisses off waifufags, either way, she's a generic anime character trope just like every single fate character.

>> No.32284479

>mfw the French stories have Gawain begging Lancelot's forgiveness on his deathbed

fucking French

>> No.32284485

That doesn't change the deliciousness of half-god half-giant D.
Imagine the girth!

>> No.32284498

>Why does she hide herself as a Man then?
Because magic commanding you to be king doesn't mean the people will take it lying down and having to re-conquer your own nation would be far more annoying than hiding your titties. She had no desire to live as a girl to begin with.

>Why did none of her soldiers notice she was the smallest person on the battlefield?

They did. They looked at her and saw a prepubescent boy who never aged, and Merlin explained that Excalibur('s sheath) made 'him' immortal. They came to the conclusion that he never aged and was always a young boy on their own.

>It has boob room, it's also a fucking frilly dress.

The 'boob room' is standard for any chest plate, you gotta have room for padding.
And dresses were gender-neutral back then too.

>Sure, but you can't call it an accurate representation then can you when you change a FUNDAMENTAL THEME OF THE STORY.

Theme nothing, if all the events and characters are the same then how is the theme changed at all? It's still about kings and the right of succession driving a knight to madness and the common men being so much less than their divine ruler that everything gets fucked.

>> No.32284503

>Smallest on the battlefield
When she pulled out the sword in the stone her aging froze, so people assumed she still have the body and size of boy quite possibly pre puberty
>Boob room
A lot of armor has stuff like that on the chest to deflect thrusts

>I read it before

Yeah , nah you didn't

>> No.32284507

>That being said, most mythologies are unfortunately saturated with honour and glory shit.

>> No.32284510


The fate faggots actually LIKE their generic japanese shit being based off of worst Arthur.

>> No.32284517

>King Arthur was the Perfect King
And Zero examines what it would take to actually be a perfect King, and notes that within the legend Arthur REPEATEDLY fails to understand others because his ideals are more important to him than his feelings. Which makes him a great King but a shitty person.

A good person might have been able to save Lancelot by talking him down, or maybe they wouldn't have. What matters to the story is that Arthur didn't even TRY.

>> No.32284524

>That seems off the point, considering the characters in Fate are functionally intended to be the characters of legend, and are as close to the myth as possible beyond appearances.

All but Gilgamesh who was absolutely nothing like his who he was in the legend.

>> No.32284536


The new Loki is better

>> No.32284546

That didn't happen in Fate though, Gawain died despising Lancelot for his treachery and failure.

>> No.32284563

>b-but muh glory!

Hit a nerve, I see. Didn't know /tg/ was seething with viking fanboys.

>> No.32284565

That's actually explained as his being unable to relate to modern humanity because they're such shitters.

Also because he lost Enkidu.

Basically he's just in a permanent bad mood and he can't find anyone to cheer him up because all the Heroes are gone.

That's why basically the only person he likes in Zero is Alexander, because Alexander is a big beefy nutcase.

>> No.32284571

They got the "Arrogant asshole unless Enkidu is around" right.

Then again I'm not exactly versed in Bablyonian mythology and my may exposure was a quick once over in high school.

>> No.32284572


It's more like he was exactly in legend, but before Enkidu came around. Why he was unchanged from that character development was never given any good reasoning.

>> No.32284590


So basically. Fate needs to make alteration after alteration to the story of King Arthur. Again, I will point out, this means you cannot call it a faithful representation


>This armor
>Gender Neutral

>Arthur is a perfect king
>Except we confuse the word Perfect for Autistic.

>> No.32284604

You're awfully tsun-tsun for best god, aren't you?
Accept your role as a giant's personal cumbucket.
You'll enjoy it, I promise...

>> No.32284614

>This armor
>Gender Neutral

It is. It totally is. It's a breastplate, gauntlets, greaves, and long tassets fit for cavalry. It's completely functional armor that anyone could wear, so long as they had the strength to carry around those heavy tassets.

>> No.32284623

Actually, I just find the idea that you dislike heroism in mythologies hilariously stupid.

Hinduism is my favorite Mythology, and thats a fucking Dragonball Z Saga.

>> No.32284628

In how he handled the Lancelot situation? Yes.

Rather than doing anything rational like punishing him for being a dick he decided to put his feelings aside repeatedly in the name of virtue and legalism.

>Perfect king
>Has hundreds of children murdered on the off-chance one of them might be his incestuous spawn



>> No.32284630


Hey, asshole. Wanna take a break from your "God I hate Fate" brigade? For fuck's sake, who gives a shit. Congrats, there are a bunch of fucking variations on the Arthur mythos, Even the fucking wiki page (because I haven't read this) says that "Yeah, there's like, 6 different "King Arthurs"".

Also, their Lu Bu is pretty accurate: a raging douche-cannon who betrays basically EVERYONE he ever meets or works for, and is only tolerated because he's an unstoppable juggernaut on the battlefield, until he finally runs into an army he can't beat.

Finally, as a point of order, Lancelot was a fucking fantastic knight. He's explicitly the BEST knight. He then fucks up anyway. BECAUSE EVERYONE CAN FUCK UP. THAT'S HIS FUCKING THEME. THE MORE POWER AND TRUST YOU PUT IN A PERSON, THE MORE THEY CAN HURT YOU.


I Am going to agree with the dude I'm arguing with, though. Practically every culture in history has had the concepts of honor and glory. They're practically defining traits of masculinity. Japan, China, India, Islam, Hellenism, Greeks, Romans, Native Americans, South Americans, African tribesmen.

The only group I can't recall OFFHAND having notions of honor and glory are Australian Aborigines. And that's more likely because I just don't know them.

I mean, what ELSE would you like to see in northern climes than "stand-in vikings?" Stand-in Canadians?

>> No.32284633

>So basically. Fate needs to make alteration after alteration to the story of King Arthur.

Are you trying to tell me the once and future king was not going to rule forever?
He WAS immortal, the sheath of Excalibur made him so in myth.

>> No.32284658


No fuck that shit, its like you didn't read his Epic.
Gil was hugely into what the gods wanted from him save that bitch Ishtar. And if he wasn't into being a good king like at the end of his Epic he was all about building his glory or trying to become immortal because the afterlife was filled with shit.

Fate's Gil lacked these things. He was faggot who cared not about his kingdom or his gods, or even living.

>> No.32284683

>Gil was hugely into what the gods wanted from him

Which is why Aruru crafted Enkidu from clay SOLELY to punish Gilgamesh for his hubris, right?
Did you read the Epic of Gilgamesh at all?

>> No.32284713

Because the world is pale and lifeless without his bosom buddy.

Also because the modern world is apparently lame as fuck compared to his Sumeria which has laser fighter jets and shit and yet these humans think they can talk shit to the KING OF KINGS.

>> No.32284718

I don't dislike heroism in mythologies, I don't where you got that. Heroism, sure, but the viking shit about dying in battle for glory and all that shit just grates on me after a while. Where's all the amazing fucking spellcasters who aren't secretly evil or calm, rational, logical badass warriors who don't charge in like retards for honour. I must be looking in all the wrong places or there's nothing but lug head fighters.

>> No.32284719

Towards the end, and kinda before he meet Enkidu he was more into what the gods wanted from him but then it went all into what he wanted.

>> No.32284721

His kingdom and gods were dead. I mean, it's not like I can catch a plane to Uruk, and worship at the temple of Marduk.

Actually, maybe that's why he's an apathetic dick: not just Enkidu, but literally everything he cared about is gone. That would make sense to me.

But, as a non-reader, I have no idea if they ever address that idea.

It made him invincible, not immortal. There's a difference. It technically didn't even do that, it just made it so he wouldn't bleed from wounds. But that could easily just be a poetic description of invincibility

>> No.32284744

He still went all the way to the ends of the earth just to look for a weed at the bottom of the sea on the off chance it would let him live forever, not because he wanted Enkidu back. Then he cried like a bitch when a snake eat it.

>> No.32284745

Whoa son, calm down just because I pointed out flaws in your waifu-sim game.

Sure, themes are interpretable, and yes, sure, you can have different varations of the arthur mythos.

But guess what Weeb? You can't have a supremely outlandish one made with tons of strange changes for no real reason that contradict alot of other, older and more accepted reasons and then say it's "Accurate"

That is what I was arguing this entire time you greasy chode.

I don't care for the setting because it's generic Japanese shit, but I am not exactly going to hate it purely for that. What I do hate are the fans and people assume it's awesome because it uses names from history and mythology and then somehow assume some slant-eyes did anything more than read a fucking wikipedia entry on each of them.

>Where's all the amazing fucking spellcasters who aren't secretly evil or calm, rational, logical badass warriors who don't charge in like retards for honour

The fact that you described two Norse gods shows your a fucking tool man.

>> No.32284751


He was still rex quondam, rexque futurus. King Arthur's rule never stops, immortal or no.

>> No.32284764

Yeah, no.

Most of the point of Gilgamesh was
"Gotta live forever fast"

Not just being a cunt and having a niggerfriend.

>> No.32284774

>I mean, what ELSE would you like to see in northern climes than "stand-in vikings?" Stand-in Canadians?

Anything, maybe? Why not Native Americans? Why not put whatever you want in there?

What about stand-in Aztecs? Stepped pyramids stained with frozen blood sticking out of thick forests under gloomy skies, lichen encrusted serpents and feathered monsters carved out of boulders and mountainsides.

>> No.32284784

>he thinks glory and honour is restricted only to Viking Tales
be still, my shattered sides

>> No.32284788

>on the off chance it would let him live forever

Because the death of Enkidu made him aware of his own mortality.

And the idea that he doesn't care about his kingdom is silly, have you seen his speech to Alexander and Arthur? His idea is that the King must stand above everyone else, to provide a perfect order to the world. He disassociates himself from others because he HAS NO EQUAL.

By the end of Zero he ALMOST respects Alexander, but still shoots down his offer for alliance because he only considers Enkidu worthy of standing by his side and Enkidu is long since dead.

>> No.32284791


Yeah but he also stopped caring about it after he had his moment and decided to live forever through his works instead of literally.

Then he shows up in the modern era and finds out all his works are dust.

>> No.32284797

Guess you're the cool tough Internet smart-guy here! Doesn't make my point invalid. Everything's still saturated with burly glory-whores.

>> No.32284808

>He doesn't like mighty thews

Get a load of this guy

>> No.32284815

Nah, that's just the most painfully obvious shit is all. Do take a minute to, like, read the thread.

>> No.32284826

Only if you take a minute to read anything more than entry level norse mythology

>> No.32284843

I don't like oversaturation is all. Boring now.

Man, /tg/ really doesn't like someone's opinions going against the norm, eh? God forbid I don't like your never-ending torrent glorious, manly warriors!

>> No.32284854

I bet this guy hates Guan Yu.

>> No.32284860

Yes all that is true, however he still is a man of his own desire.

And you don't think that would make him want to do something about that? You don't really think he'd be satisfied in the shadows all but forgotten? No that crazy fuck would be out carving the world or at least a city into his own image.

>> No.32284871

If only I gave a shit, right?

My actual problem is its presence in media. It's so boring. That's what bores me to no end.

>> No.32284892

No, instead you want spellcasters.... for some reason thinking mythology is just like an RPG and everyone chooses a class.... or you want tactical soldiers... whom exist in every mythology ever but I guess they can't also loom for glory

Heroism bores you, please, do tell us, Why do you hate the heroic warrior fighting his way to victory with tenacity and cunning?

>> No.32284895

Then that's your fault for being a superficial dumb fuck.

>> No.32284920


He was probably planning on it until he realized how shitty the earth became while he was away.

Now he's just on a sort of insane crusade to try and make everybody awesome again.

>> No.32284925

I'm sure it is. Stay smug.

>> No.32284934


Now, see. Just butting in the conversation to say this

People might joke calling you a fag for opinions here but with enough reasoning you would certainly be able to carry an argument

The problem here is that you're being an asshole, phrasing like an asshole, and started name calling and angry spewing at very little provocation.

So stop being an asshole and maybe the discussion can end in a better way

>> No.32284935

For whose benefit?

Modern man is a pale imitation of even his subjects. He only cares to gather those actually worthy of him which is why the only people he bothers to associate with are the other two Great Kings, Alexander and Arthur. And even then he sees them as entirely subordinate - Alexander is almost good enough to hang, and Arthur is only good as his waifu.

Also he actually is - I forget where it's stated but his plan if he ever actually got the Grail is basically to kickstart humanity back to Awesome Demigod status so that he has proper subjects to rule over and remake the world.

>> No.32284951

Jesus fuck, can you take your obsession with being the poor, oppressed lone voice of reason somewhere else?

>> No.32284967

And still all he really did was get drunk and enable other losers in zero and then sit on his ass for 10 years in the shadows with his thumb up his ass. Waiting for someone else to do the heavy lifting.

Gilgamesh fucked up monsters and started wars because he was bored.

>> No.32284987

His own. It never seemed like he gave that much of a shit about his subjects other then making sure that they knew he was there and better then them.

>> No.32285003

I can't even deal with /tg/ being butthurt over all this, it's too much.

>> No.32285006

Who are:
Utgard Loki (evilness questionable)

Who is Tyr?

I literally told I you haven't read this (because it's a visual novel, not a game. Think "Choose Your Own Adventure")

Personally, I don't know why they made Arthur a woman, and do think it's more than a little silly. On the other hand, given the overwhelming masculinity of ancient heroes, and the lack of heroines, I can see why they'd change a couple for purely visual reasons.

The point you're responding to is my first entry into this discussion.

I just decided to talk to you like you've been talking to everyone else in the thread.

It's more /tg/ just like to argue. Hell, you're arguing with at least two posters who are arguing with each other.

Native Americans wouldn't free you of "muh honor, muh glory", as I pointed out earlier. They still definitely raided other tribes for glory, and possessed codes of honor that you could be exiled for failing.

The same is true of the Aztecs.

I'm fine with you not liking the aesthetics of the VIkings, but your initial complaint was:
> I'm sick of Muh honor and muh glory
And there's practically NO culture that doesn't care about that at least a little.

IN his, and Norse mythology's defense, being a spellcaster in Norse myth typically made one suspect as a warrior. This is more because, given the lower lifespans, you could really only train as one thing, so if you spent years studying Odin's seidr, you probably hadn't spent too much time on your stabbin'.

>> No.32285052

IN other news, all this talk has made me wish Scion wasn't a mechanical nightmare, so I could run a couple games of "demigod adventures"

>> No.32285054

>mfw I used reversed Magic's stack rules to get it

Essentially, with a stack of First-In-First-Resolved, she cast a spell that supposedly go under the first spell in the stack. But the spear has an effect that ALREADY do damage as soon as it is added to the stack. Then the damage happen outside of the stack, damage and kill her, and hamper before she can have her spell put itself above the first spell that was the spearman's attack.

Seriously though, japanese have too much time on their hands.

>> No.32285097

>all he really did was get drunk and enable other losers in zero
You can't leave the Holy Grail War.
>and then sit on his ass for 10 years in the shadows with his thumb up his ass
Staking out the modern era and learning just how shitty it is.
>Gilgamesh fucked up monsters and started wars because he was bored.
He's not that bored, he's more pissed off than anything. He has a plan and something to do, and there are no monsters left to kill (except vampires, but who wants to bother with those).

>> No.32285180

What really pisses me off about Fate is how people attempt to apply their characterization retroactively when talking about them. The mythological Gilgamesh is treated as if he had already participated in all the games and novels, as with Arthur and Alexander and all the other popular characters who had taken a sudden left turn in the games and anime.

Why can't we just talk about old folk heroes without sinking to the level of a Japanese anime's interpretations?

>> No.32285230

>and there are no monsters left to kill (except vampires, but who wants to bother with those).
But he never went out monster hunting or doing anything to rebuild his own fame, for example wasting Squidzilla.

In the epic the three most important things to him were, his FUN FAME and LIFE. In fate the only thing he kinda focused on was fun and it wasn't his own. And when he hung out with Enkidu back in the day or whatever other nameless pleb he might have brought around he always focused on his own fun which usually brokered him more fame. Hell even his personality felt wrong.

>> No.32285278

In the prototype (and prequel) Arthur was a man and your pov character was a woman, but then they switched it around for the main character to be a man (as the majority of the audience would be men anyway),so they switched Arthur to being female to avoid having him outshine shirou in front of the Vn's waifus

>> No.32285303

>Still wearing a bright blue dress

>> No.32285336


Arkantos here. Trojans a shit. Achaeans a shit. Atlantis rules the waves.

>> No.32285337

>and prequel
Not a prequel, not at all.

>> No.32285406

>MFW I discovered Arkantos wasn't a real Greek hero

Childhood me was very sad to find that out. At least the Atlanteans were kick-ass OP in the expansion

>> No.32285412

the prequel was refering to the prequel to prototype.

>> No.32285479

oh, I forgot that even existed
translation never

>> No.32285510

>At least the Atlanteans were kick-ass OP in the expansion
>mfw regenerating Titans
>my enemies face when regenerating Titans

>> No.32285517

I'd really like a mod that makes the Atlanteans from the campaign use the Titans Atlantean civ. Although it might make the first level a complete cakewalk with hero Arcus.

>> No.32285525


I don't like the new Gilgamesh

>> No.32285564

Somone on Bl translated the first cha[ter when it came out, but i haven't heard of it since.

Fate/fake got a full translation a while back, and most of the first book of Apoc is translated as well (1/5)

>> No.32285588

He's surprisingly non dickish

>> No.32285617

Why did this thread become about a visual novel? That's not even close to traditional games OR mythology.

>> No.32285644

>why did a thread on /tg/ get derailed
well gee wiz, I wonder

>> No.32285700

It's a visual novel about mythology.

>> No.32285704

To be fair though this is only one or two degrees separation from the origenal topic and traditional gaming.

>> No.32285721

No, it's a visual novel about a game-like war involving characters FROM mythology.

>> No.32285799

Let's see the original topic...
>roleplaying as famous warriors from mythology
Let's see what it is now
>discussing the merits of a visual novel/anime/manga series about a war waged using modern interpretations of famous warriors from mythology
I'd say it's more 45 degrees of separation.

>> No.32285852

>Shakespearean English
I've read Macbeth and Othello and that shit's still just gibberish to me.

I'd have an easier time comprehending Middle English

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