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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.31617722 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Hiya fa/tg/uys, let's have /tg/ humor thread

>> No.31618130

Man, it's hard being of asian descent. The only thing that grows on your face is a bloody Fu Man Chu

>> No.31618177

>> No.31618225

>> No.31618264 [SPOILER] 

you say that as if it is a bad thing

>> No.31618315

facial hair is (usually) stupid looking anyway

>> No.31618340

count your blessings. my face looks weird without a mustache.

>> No.31618351

pubic-hair face detected

>> No.31618364


>> No.31618461

>> No.31618482

>> No.31618993

>tfw you only grow hair where a fumanchu wouldn't grow

Jesus christ what's wrong with me?

>> No.31619012

Do /tg/ filenames count?

>> No.31619034

You're a Double Asian

>> No.31619066

>A derogatory term for a mentally retarded person.
>Did you guys see that mongoloid look at me? Let's beat him up.

>> No.31619214

>mongoloid can only refer to asiatic inlanders
Image is funny but whoever made it is dense as fuck

>> No.31619234

Probably tumblrfags, honestly.

>> No.31619271

Man, I wish I was a mongol. Shit would be so cash.

>> No.31619700

Emphasis on *usually* I guess?
'cause that level of beard is definitively not common.

ah, it's way older. Refer to the eyes of Down-syndrome people being asian-like IIRC.
It's insulting to the asiatic inlanders tho.

>> No.31619743


I have a full beard, including redneck high cheekbone beard and neckbeard that joins up with my chest hair...

...except on my upper lip, where there is a negative image of a hitlerstache where hair won't grow.

It's like my german jewish genes still carry a grudge and they've integrated it into my anatomy.

>> No.31619777


Anyone have the pic in that thread?

>> No.31619787

This was a fun thread that produced this.

>> No.31619839


>> No.31619910

Same here, full beard and a Cantinflas mustache. It sucks balls, I want to have a full dwarven beard.

>> No.31620086

Holy fuck this is mortifying

>> No.31620294

>> No.31620321

> screencap doesn't contain the sound

>> No.31620336


>> No.31620512


>not having a neck-goatee

>> No.31620555

> looking like the turbonerd you are
No. Always hide powerlevel.

>> No.31620623

I laughed way too hard at this.

>> No.31620672


>> No.31620759


>> No.31620763

I have a large curly moustachio. It looks fucking retarded. However, I grow the worst 5 o'clock shadow on my upper lip, and will go from looking like a respectable citizen to a pedophile in about ten hours.
It's the lesser of two evils.

>> No.31620805


>grows a curly moustache with no effort
>shaves it

Not even once, your upper lip is sending you a message with that pedostubble anon. Own that fucking moustachio like a boss.

>> No.31620851

>> No.31620852

>> No.31620880

>> No.31620900

No /tg/, but funny.

>> No.31620907

I remember that thread.
Good one, that.

>> No.31620913

I saw the last panel yesterday and was all "wat" but NOW I get it.

>> No.31620916

>> No.31620925


>> No.31620938

more-over, there is nothing about arrows to 'fore' either

Bows aren't firearms!

>> No.31620973


Firing an arrow is when you light the end on fire isn't it?

So when he fires a bow he lights it on fire... which is actually kinda metal.

>> No.31620981

You, my friend, are the second coming of Harcourt Fenton Mudd.

>> No.31621014


You win at moustaches.

Wear it with pride, wear it in peace (or invasions of belgium).

>> No.31621032

My honest-to-God hero.

>> No.31621104


>> No.31621136


>> No.31621139

>> No.31621157


>> No.31621160

Fuck everything

>> No.31621211

why is this not in .webm?

>> No.31621284

>> No.31621300

>> No.31621312


>> No.31621330


>> No.31621337


>> No.31621399


What a bitch.

>> No.31621415


>> No.31621428


>> No.31621499


>> No.31621508


>> No.31621509

>> No.31621538


This group needs a Henderson.

>> No.31621554


Someone's going to have to explain this one to me, I can't see the benefit of discarding your hand.

>> No.31621565


I'd rather say it needs 1.5 Hendersons. Possibly more.

>> No.31621573

Oscar would be more appropriate IMO.

>> No.31621575

Because not everyone is a trendy faggot that cares enough about MUH NEW FORMAT to go around converting all the gifs on the internet.

>> No.31621582


...you don't really get the appeal of playing Black, do you?

>> No.31621592


I guess not.

>> No.31621601

I am sorely tempted to fill this in. Do I need to paste over FF?

>> No.31621614

You destroy your one land and discard your entire hand. Its the wporst possible opener in magic

>> No.31621624

No, just open the image in a new tab and fill it directly on your screen with a permanent marker.
A stone chisel could work too.

>> No.31621625



>> No.31621626

Fuck that, there's no humor in that. Oh god the feels

>> No.31621634


Deep down in his heart of hearts, every Black player wants to live out that scene in The Princess Bride where Vizzini shouts NEVER GO AGAINST A SICILIAN WHEN DEATH IS ON THE LINE!, laughs his ass off, and keels over dead.

>> No.31621636


I get that. I just feel that I'm not getting something, namely the filename.

>> No.31621657

I think I'm out

>> No.31621687

it's 6.44 MB for a badger running and some text
seems like a prime candidate.

>> No.31621698

>playing at your local flgs
>playin' a little casual at the FNM
>some guy opens by destroying his one land and discarding his hand
>his graveyard shows nothing else but chimney imps
>he screams
>you concede
>you don't want to play whatever game that guy is playing.

>> No.31621708

>> No.31621723

Here's the template

>> No.31621740


Why do you use the Tomorrow style? It looks awful.

>> No.31621741

Low blow, anon.
I hope you got your kicks. This is a HUMOUR thread, you sadist.

>> No.31621767


>> No.31621831


That is the most glorious of things.

>> No.31621840

Do note there are other group-generated charsheets besides this one. Lemme see if I've still got a copy of my favorite (it's the one with the line for Max von Sydow, if anyone can find it before me).

>> No.31621885


>> No.31621946

Did you get the dwarf and the orc too?

>> No.31621977


>> No.31621995


>> No.31621996

I really wish I hadn't missed this thread the other day. I didn't expect it to be so . . . interesting.

>> No.31622022


>> No.31622024

It doesn't burn my retinas with whitespace, nor waste battery with the same.
Also fuck you, I like it.

>> No.31622044

It was pretty damn great.
Also included some snippets from other minor writefags for... Kharne and... else.

>> No.31622083

From the last draw thread

>> No.31622103

halfarsed cut&paste together epilogue Kharne

>> No.31622119

Holy fuck my sides

>> No.31622184


>> No.31622214

I think I have the collected Brogan files laying about, too.

>> No.31622254


>Didn't finish

The greatest of dishonors.

>> No.31622279

Maybe it's intended for someone else to come along and solve it?

>> No.31622372

The true best opener in all of Magic

>Dark Ritual
>Dark Ritual
>Dark Ritual
>Tormond's Crypt
>Respond With Kaervek's Spite targeting yourself
>Activate Tormond's Crypt targeting yourself.

You are now truly One with Nothing. You have no field, no hand, no graveyard, and no library.

>> No.31622440

>Do your worst, I've already won

>> No.31622485

Makes sense, that's what the samurai's second is for.

>> No.31622494

If some had that as an actual starting hand and did it, I would worship them.

>> No.31622496

B-but chimney imp doesn't trigger from hand to graveyard.

Or is that the joke?

>> No.31622544

Are you badass enough to play against a deck made of nothing but Chimney Imps, Wood Elementals, Storm Ravens and One with Nothing?

No you're not.

>> No.31622571

>Not knowing the name of our glorious patron Saint Storm Crow

>> No.31622581


>> No.31622604

I done goofed. I'm going to whip myself with a dozen Sherazade as redemption.

>> No.31622646

>this entire thread

Thanks for convincing me that /tg/ is truly dead, and its corpse is now infested with unfunny faggots, most of them who do not even give a shit about traditional games.

A sincere fuck you, but I still thank you for removing any doubt.

>> No.31622672

why are you still here?

>> No.31622692

Uh, this is only ONE thread. You'll generalize /tg/ based on one edgy thread?

>> No.31622705


Mongoloid (East Asian, Polynesian, Indigenous American) is one of the four biological anthropological racial classifications alongside Caucasoid (European, Caucasian, West Asian, Central Asian, South Asian, North African, Horn of African), Negroid (Sub-Saharan) possibly and Australoid (Aboriginal Australian, Negrito, Fuegian, Melanesian, Micronesian). Dravidian, Capoid and Ceyloni are also possible classifications if you're a twat.

Mongoloid as a slur word for people with Down's Syndrome is utterly ridiculous. "Oh look, our baby's asian despite us being brythonic celts." What the fuck kind of sense does that make? None at all.

>> No.31622711

Wait, thought I was in another thread. I like this one.

Also, "hurr durr my sense of humor is different and things I don't find funny are shit"

>> No.31622722

I think that's because of their distinctive eye shape.

>> No.31622725

Say that to my face motherfucker. And not online.

>> No.31622739

Wait a minute, Leveler + Kaervek's Spite is 8 mana, 3 rituals ain't gonna cut it.

>> No.31622759

Out of curiosity, which thread were you intending to passive-aggressively call out?

>> No.31622792

>> No.31622794

>He was a mongoloid
>and nobody was aware

>> No.31622799


Here I was thinking you'd be used to that, you unfunny cockmunch.

>> No.31622800


This. Well, I didn't know what to call it but edgy is the most descriptive for the most of it.

>> No.31622810

>> No.31622816

Dali that shit.

>> No.31622851


He didn't check to make sure that the spiders weren't full of spiders.

>> No.31622852

>> No.31622863

The hell is this nigger talking about? Is /tg/ infested with pedophiles or something?

>> No.31622867

>> No.31622884 [DELETED] 

>> No.31622910

I like it. I have a similar method though.
>dark ritual
>lotus petal
>sinkhole your swamp
>tormod's crypt
>demonic consultation naming a card not in your deck
>one with nothing
>activate tormod's crypt targeting yourself

>> No.31622916

This one isn't the best, but meh.

>> No.31622920

Please! PLEASE! Someone must have the Sharks are Dark Elves screencapped!

I'm typing on my knees here as I beg,

>> No.31622934

>> No.31622951

Meanwhile in another thread, a shitstorm of butthurt is going on about OP and someone posting SFW'ish loli pictures. It's really sad.

>> No.31623084

>> No.31623098

>> No.31623105

>> No.31623112

>people not getting the reference

>> No.31623117

>> No.31623138

Anyone got the one where the guy talks his group into rolling up the Animorphs, all druids?

>> No.31623159

>> No.31623165





>> No.31623173

Casemods?? Why are you on /tg/? Where have you been??

>> No.31623177

Problem is that the anon fucked up the mass. Conservation of momentum only results in equal velocity if the mass of both objects is the same. Meaning that unless the human weighs 1,500 pounds, he's not getting that shit moving at 15m/s. Now if he carried the back with him and ran, then suddenly stopped with the top open on the other hand...

>> No.31623202

A classic.

>> No.31623213

It's good if you sit in mommy's dark basement.

>> No.31623214

>> No.31623219

>> No.31623225

But do you have the all-barbarian party?

>> No.31623232

Does anyone have the screencap for playing Mage as clowns?

>> No.31623254


Does any one else ever wonder what it'd feel like to get bitten on the dick by a brown recluse? Like, does the necrotism burn or sting, and how would that feel when parsed through some of the most sensitive clusters of nerves on your body?

>> No.31623274

the second ending is still shit

>> No.31623298

Stop. Never think that again.
Stand up. Walk outside.
Stare into the sun. Regret your life up to this point.
Praise the sun. Embrace your new life a blind, enlightened seer.

>> No.31623303

Well, considering how painful and deadly that bite already is, I'd imagine it would first feel like you stuck your dick into molten steel and were denied the sweet release of it being burned off. Then, as your boner quickly recedes, it would rapidly spread the venom all over your body.

In short, don't do it.

>> No.31623335

>Palinka effect
I don't get it, Palinka is basically Romunian (I think) rakia

>> No.31623336

>it puts the butter on the skin or gets stuck in the door again

>> No.31623345

>yfw people save your thread

I still say it's a good idea

>> No.31623349

I know exactly what you're talking about, but I don't seem to have it, only this

>> No.31623365

Nah it's mostly known as a Hungarian specialty, but Romanians have it too afaik. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P%C3%A1linka

>> No.31623387

While I'm at it I'll post a couple more

>> No.31623394

>> No.31623409

>you will never have a game with Captain Dicebeard

feels bad, man

>> No.31623410

> not understanding that this is all a fucking reference
I hate you sometimes, /tg/


>> No.31623430

>> No.31623437

It's a magical bag of holding you god damn moron. It empties as fast as the anon manages to flip it inside out.

>> No.31623438

Well that makes it even more confusing. Hungarians were never a part of Yugoslavia and they are basically European Asians, not Slavs

>> No.31623443

>> No.31623459

>> No.31623468

actually pálinka could be a very wide term depending on who you ask.
Vodka for example is basically potato pálinka.
Also you can brew pálinka from anything.

>> No.31623473

>> No.31623476

It's not rape if it's an elf.

>> No.31623478

A recent one.

>> No.31623488

Anyone got the one about the bard who pretends to be a paladin?

like he was staring in a play and got roped into a whole adventure

>> No.31623489

>> No.31623510

>> No.31623527

>> No.31623538

>> No.31623542


>> No.31623546

Oh my gods, I did this man in history A-level. This is the best thing I've seen all day.
Law revision is suffering

>> No.31623547

oh no.. someone didn't get a reference from a shitty show...

>> No.31623554

Not /tg/ but fuck it.

>> No.31623556

>> No.31623566

>> No.31623568


>RED sniper

Get the fuck out

>> No.31623577

Turns out I do have the one with a WoD Clown mage

>> No.31623584

>> No.31623594

>> No.31623603

>> No.31623607

I actually really like that last one as the plot for an ERP.

>> No.31623610

This convinced me to play Gamma World.

>> No.31623612

You mean this?

>> No.31623625

>> No.31623628


Ant more like this?

>> No.31623642

>> No.31623656

>> No.31623659

Fuck, I was in that thread. It was glorious.

>> No.31623665


>> No.31623685

Would've been funnier without the last elf line. Just leave it to the imagination.

>> No.31623686

>> No.31623687

>> No.31623698

>> No.31623701

Are you guys really entertained by les epic maymays like this?
Jesus stop revering these shitty posts you screencap and get out there and make good posts yourself.

>> No.31623709

>> No.31623712


>> No.31623719

And that's all from me.

>> No.31623744

What is sauce on the manga?

>> No.31623745

>Rogue Trader
>Saving throw

>> No.31623746

I don't believe this. In my entire time on WoW I NEVER saw any good RPers.

>> No.31623750


Got to Foolz archive, find it. Screencap it yourself.

>> No.31623772


I can only imagine how they reacted to FFXIII-3.

>> No.31623799


>> No.31623810

Pretty sure it's Voynich Hotel from Dowman Sayman. Be advised it has a very slow release schedule, made worse for non-Japanese speakers by the fact that the only translator only has access to collected volumes (of which #2 should come out next year, iirc).

>> No.31623888

Well this is sad. But still, I want to know why (s)he wears a "fuck me" t-shirt.

>> No.31623908

Reasonably sure that one's been confirmed as a fake subtitle job to stir up 4chan.

>> No.31623935

It's not that bad, the series is still being released, just slowly. If you don't mind spoilers, she's wearing the shirt because she's a centuries-old witch who needs an heir to perpetuate herself, and she likes that guy, and her older sister gives terrible relationship advice.

>> No.31623972


Well now I have to read it to justify not reading your spoiler.

>> No.31624032

It's a really good series if you like weird shit (to give you an example of how this writer rolls, he made a one-shot about teenage zombie girls gushing over the cute guys they want to eat), and it seems you're in luck, I just checked after this reminded me and the total number of scanlated chapters has doubled since I last read it.

>> No.31624058

... You mean this guy directly pander to my fetishes. Alright, reading. Thank you very much.

>> No.31624170

This is the truth.

>> No.31624171


I love that MtG started as a mornington crescent style "make up rules and cards as you go along" type of thing on /tg/ taking the piss out of pokemon and yugioh style tcgs, and has some how blossomed into this thing where people can legitimately assert that there's best plays and card set ups and openers.

>> No.31624202

For me, posts like this are in the same category as intentionally-mislabeled images, I'm just not amused.

>> No.31624256

>First chapter
Well, kinda usual start, but not necessarily bad.
>Second chapter
Oh hey, this is getting good! Kinda channel a Deadman Wonderland feeli-

>> No.31624426


>> No.31624463

But this is like, the shittiest I've ever seen /tg/ being. I'll agree, never change /tg/, but never change because this doesn't happen here most of the time.

>> No.31624472

Keep going, it gets even better

>> No.31624503

I always die when I read this.

>> No.31624557

>> No.31624558

Well, I know what my paladin will be doing first thing he can.

>> No.31624564

>/tg/- Fags patting themselves on the back.

Holy fuck this thread is terrible.

>> No.31624588


>> No.31624611

Nobody forces you to sit and watch though.

>> No.31624670

is jerkcity /tg/ humor

>> No.31624805

Not at all

>> No.31624812

I think we saw all the Irwin stuff earlier, but I don't believe this has yet appeared.

>> No.31624839

Just dump your folder, so this shitty thread dies.
Works 10/10 times on /mu/.

>> No.31624843


Nor this, on the matter of unconventional chapters.

>> No.31624941


>> No.31624955

What the fuck am I reading?

>> No.31624979


>> No.31624984

Jerk City, an internet web comic

>> No.31624997

This better be some kinda art or shit, because I don't get this at all.

>> No.31625000

It's made with that Microsoft IRC client, isn't it?

>> No.31625007

not too much to get
post-modern absurdist humor by internet nerds for internet nerds

>> No.31625023

aaahh. Jerkcity.

>> No.31625033




>> No.31625042

let's see if this is funny or a bad screencap.

>> No.31625045

yeah, a bunch of dudes import all of their irc chat transcripts into some old comic making program which randomly generates the comic

>> No.31625046

Oh god I remember the thread the girl came as asked, It gave me a reason to post Queens Blade girls.

This one starts off talking about balls.

>> No.31625082

it's probably my second or third favorite webcomic

>> No.31625086


> 73. Not allowed to name my cudgel Ceremonial Whoopass Stick.

> 420. "For the King" is an example of a good battle cry. "Smoke the Mother" is not.

> 510. After a bloody battle, I will not celebrate by lying down and making carnage angels.

> 843. It doesn't matter how high his hit points or damage reduction are, we aren't sending the dwarf into battle via catapult.

> 1867. Can't have a gun that reduces people to Rorschach tests.

I will do everything to break each of these rules.

>> No.31625092

>> No.31625108

>> No.31625119

>> No.31625122 [DELETED] 


Speaking of balls...

>> No.31625135


>> No.31625139

>this garbage

Probably one of the worst stories that keeps getting reposted.

>> No.31625155

Sorry about that.

>> No.31625182

You Mongoloid Downs people are called mongoloids because of the distinct shape of their eyes, which makes them look like mongoloid people. It is no longer used precisely because it is offensive to Asian people.

>> No.31625204


I recognise those balls. Artist is InCase, right?

>> No.31625254


No it's some japanese artist not incase. Don't ask me who

but incase's balls are quite similar.hue hue hue

>> No.31625275

They all have.

>> No.31625346


Doesn't change the fact he probably meant everything he typed. Ironic shitposting and all that.

>> No.31625428


>> No.31625518


I hope all of you are glad that haven't bought a WiiU now.

Also, don't fuck horses, kids.

>> No.31625618

I would say that I don't do consoles and that I'm a PC mustardrace, but I'm not an asshole.
Though, I only play PC, too poor to upgrade my PC AND buy a console.

>> No.31625698


The name you're looking for is Uno Makoto. Hope you like dicks

>> No.31625819

>TFW on that image
I keep being surprised by that.

>> No.31626289

kill yourself

>> No.31626502


>> No.31627133

>Lich on a Bulette
I KNOW I saw some sort of ridiculous off the wall campaign generator that that was part of.

>> No.31627180

don't be sorry, there's nothing wrong with it outside the obnoxious twats it inevitably summons.

>> No.31627185

It's like they're us. But with squinty eyes.

>> No.31627227

Yeah, clearly their DM has read the Doc Aquatic table

>> No.31627252

I suppose that's like how 4chan makes you lonely and gay.

>> No.31627256

Like yourself?

>> No.31627462


>> No.31627481


>> No.31627499


>> No.31627598

>"you can't leave yet you didn't roleplay the kiss"
Literally facepalmed in front of my computer, this is the first time in my life something made me cringe THIS hard, and I used to browse /r9k/

>> No.31627645

>Ancient Lich seeks new thrills by becoming ramp-jumping daredevil, succeeds in jumping bulette over 27 ill-tempered kythons
>Forget what a bulette is
>Look it up
>Big armored crocodile-armadillo thing
>Has fucking +17 to jump

How the fuck can something like that even jump, let alone get that big a modifier to it?

>> No.31627673

Probably the same way a dolphin would, except with burrowing instead of swimming?

>> No.31627708

>Use this as a joke for a relatively low level group
>tell someone to roll the d100
>he rolls 100

>> No.31627734

>Dark Ritual
>Dark Ritual
>Dark Ritual
>Dark Ritual
>Lightning Greaves

watched it happen to someone and felt nothing. have i lost my soul, teej?

>> No.31627841

Ignore him, its just one fag being buttmad

>> No.31628011

Yer a fucking dingus. Play the swamp and Dark Ritual. Sink hole your own Swamp, and use the last bit of mana to play One with Nothingness. Now you have absolutley nothing.

"what now" is humorous. You're humor-less. Jeez louise.

>> No.31628416

Something small and recent. I don't know how to improve the font

>> No.31628426

Dirt daubers have lived in my area for years, I always thought they were the nicer kind of wasp. They don't sting people and just build their little houses in out of the way places.

>> No.31628502

Lost it at Pigley.

>> No.31628823


>Krod choose surprise!

Every fucking time.

>> No.31629179

Fucking you again? I thought we drove you back the last time... and the time before that....

>> No.31629396

>I believe this is appropriate.

>> No.31629577

>pedophile defense force ITT

>> No.31629740

>"I need you to help me fix the economy."
i am about to reach maximum lol

>> No.31629964

Do you guys have the one about guy playing a bear with high bluff and charisma?

>> No.31630611


>> No.31630627

>That dick-rock part
It's fucking Chickentown

>> No.31630695


>> No.31630956

>dat sound compression
it's not a good pain

>> No.31631636

He has a point.

>> No.31632162

>shitty show

Bitch Network was a motherfucking PROPHECY about what TV was turning into.

>> No.31632229

It's actually more of a land shark. With teeth.

And it's Huge.

>> No.31632883


>> No.31633381


>> No.31634321

Better version.

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