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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.31369832 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

>You will never be a Warrior of Chaos
>You will never have a badass Chaos Warhorse
>You will never visit the fun-derful warp-zone where the North pole was
>You will never plow a cultist so hard her hips break

>> No.31369869

>Never get to have her fight along side you against the gay Empire
Feels bad mad

>> No.31369900

Looking good, Cultist.

>> No.31370032

It does seem like a fun place

>> No.31370192

When you want it
How you want it"

>> No.31370224

What's in the Mountains of Questioning?

>> No.31370235

>You'll never have your mind and soul consumed by Chaos and gradually forget everything until you're just a mindless husk of the Chaos Gods

Gee, I'm sure missing out.

>> No.31370261


Maybe you should find out?

>> No.31370296

But you get a loyal daemon bride, each with it's own boon!
K: Great stamina
S: Either a 3 foot long tongue, claw or tentical
N: Free from pain and depression
T: 50lb telekinesis

>> No.31370299

Wouldn't that be dangerous?

>> No.31370321

How do you know?

>> No.31370349

Isn't that what the Ecclesiarchy tells us?

>> No.31370352

Fantasy chaos feels somehow less "evil" than in 40k

The opposite for Orcs imo

>> No.31370383

What do they know?

>> No.31370404

Going Slaanesh because that daemonette is too cute

>> No.31370420

Don't they say the Warp is an abominable place?

>> No.31370427

Excellent choice!

>> No.31370470


>> No.31370503

That's because it stays more true to what Chaos originally was: a mix of good and bad. Since Chaos isnt meant to be inherently evil.

>> No.31370527

Ya 40k's chaos gets stupid

This is more Fantasy based, but cultist are welcomed

>> No.31370539

So many fetishes!

Indeed, we're not all hyper murder-rapist over here...

>> No.31370550

Hey whats going on in...

>> No.31370575

I don't know, what are YOU doing here?
This isn't even the same universe (though same multi-verse)

>> No.31370576

>Ya 40k's chaos gets stupid
It's not our fault 40kiddie writers can't into gray on grey conflict...

>> No.31370652

I don't get this, why the questions?

>> No.31370665

I'd rather be a psyker than a warrior


>> No.31370701

Isn't this the only safe way to get an answer from someone who knows what's in the Mountains of Questioning?

>> No.31370706

>dat sweedish cultist
Muh dick...

>> No.31370771


Sorry OP but all I can see is a Chaos Anna from Frozen.

"Do you wanna raise a daemon?"

>> No.31370850

>Elsa was a sorceress of tzneech
Suddenly the lord of change sounds fun

>> No.31370875


All Disney stories are set on worlds lost during the DAoT. Walt Disney told me during the ritual to attach his head to a new body.

>> No.31370933


Same here but I didn't want to say anything

Fucking Frozen

>> No.31370986


>the sleigh-ride never ends

>> No.31371009


I am making it end, for me

>> No.31371127

I wish the drawfag who drew this namefag'd. Its a good piece.

>> No.31371167


>> No.31371171


Congratulations! You passed the test! You win a Blu-Ray copy of Frozen!

>> No.31371220

>all these heretics

>> No.31371245

>Getting into warhammer
>read up on other armies
If 1d4chans tactics page is anything to go off, I'm fucked against these guys...

>> No.31371263

Alright, I've never seen the movie, but it shred seems to create responses. Is it that good/bad?
Also, what is it even about?

>> No.31371280

If only these things could be true. It would truly be the best of life...

>> No.31371296

Says the psyker posing as a commissar.

>> No.31371315

Can I be a psyker working for Nurgle? Spreading diseases via mind bullet sounds fun.

If yes, I'm totally switching to Chaos.

>> No.31371324

Is there even anything that says psykers can't be commissars?

Also time for heresy

>> No.31371331

its good but vastly overrated (mostly by reddit) so many people are confused as to wheather they should like it or not.

>> No.31371374

I just know that people flipped their shit over it. Also that a bunch of porn got made of it.

>> No.31371402


You can. Pretty much every Chaos God except Khorne has sorcerors.

>> No.31371412



>> No.31371458

Precisely. Also, are you sure those are mountains? Maybe it's a perspective trick, one of them optical delusions.

>> No.31371483

you can't go in with "high" expectations
You really really can't

Before I watched the movie I was browing a /co/ thread of animation clipping errors in Frozen

ruined the goddamn fucking movie for me

>> No.31371499

khorne has sorcerors, they mainly summon daemons, what he doesn't like is combat sorcery.

>> No.31371517

>[citation needed]

>> No.31371539

i thought there was a source for this

I remember reading a 9358483294823 replies thread on /tg/ about how it wasn't or was canon or not. Dont remember the details

was a bad thread

>> No.31371549


>> No.31371561

Fuck this gay earth.

>> No.31371568

>tfw never be judged by the Gorequeen

>> No.31371573

How fun.

Oh god poor katia would be scared shitless of the Emps

>> No.31371583

>taking /tg/ at face value
Not even once, people just echo shit

If you want to learn about chaos especially fantasy's chaos, You MUST read the Liber Chaotica. It is arguably the highest ranking cannon for chaos

>> No.31371607

>you will never embrace her, bleeding from the spikes and thus please the blood god with your love

>> No.31371629

>tfw never feel her wrath because I ran away from a fight
>dat feeru wen neva feeru skull sacrificido to khorno

>> No.31371665

It's between Nurgle and Slaan on this one
Slaanesh would probably be easier to take into public

>> No.31371697

>> No.31371711

>stacked katia with hair

>> No.31371712

I'd assume the Commissar's mandate to put a bolt into the head of the Psyker at the first hint of trouble might cause some sort of conflict of interest if they're the same guy.
Psyker suffers a Perils of the Warp while manifesting a power? Blam! Daemon can possess a body without a head!
Psyker pulls a face while manifesting a power? BLAM! Probably he was suffering a Perils of the Warp.
Psyker in the vicinity when you realize your recaf is cold and you're sure you just poured it like, a minute ago? BLAM! Probably the Psyker was possessed by a daemon and attempting to sow discontent among the army's leadership.

>> No.31371732

[x] Touch feathery tail

>> No.31371798


Tzeentch if she gives me magic powers, Slaanesh if she has a dick and warp dust

>> No.31371819

>Chaos Warriors best life
>Not a Brett knight
You know our god might possibly be an elf, but at least she cares and reliably helps us

>> No.31371826


That basset hound is so fat

>> No.31371841

Yes both have those
Also Nurgle knows how to cook and clean (ironically)
Khornate is always up for sports

>> No.31371878

Tzeentch, I like that smirk

>> No.31371892

When a spell caster smirks that generally a sign to be worried

>> No.31371896


Damn it I'm caught between my two loves, power and drugs

Which one do you think has more money

>> No.31371920

*Khornate is a great personal trainer
Sorry wanted to make it more fair

>> No.31371993

>See Chaos version of Frozen character

Now I can't stop imagining a version of Let it Go in which Elsa transforms into a Chaos Spawn as she sings.

>> No.31372036

That would be perfect.

>> No.31372372

Or ascending into deamonhood.

>> No.31372416

Someone did a version starring Horus, but I lost the Vocaroo link.

>> No.31372513

Xeno >>> Cultist-chan

>> No.31372518

Is that available online anywhere?

>> No.31372992

Some manchild /co/ / tumblr / reddit disney shit that's spreading its way over the other boards. It's a fucking disney movie, for fucking children, christ. This will be the new MLP, calling it now.

>> No.31373023

You seem to have fallen through a portal from bizarro-world. Are you alright? Do you need help returning?

>> No.31373046

>You will never get every human and xeno in the galaxy to write a strongly worded letter to Chaos telling it to fuck off, which might actually work if enough emotion was put into it.

>> No.31373294

Actually... It's a Felinid from the world Carlos McConell. I'm not making this shit up.

>> No.31373325

We know about Felinids, what we were talking about was if Pyskers could be commissars.

>> No.31373342


>> No.31373365


It's true that Khornates do use 'magic' to summon Daemons or bind them into Daemon Engines and Daemon Weapons.

I wouldn't say it's the same as having sorcerors though, because that implies that there are Khorne worshippers who do nothing but work with magic. It's more like there are some warriors who do a bit of summoning or warpsmithery on the side.

>> No.31373384

So Khorne only likes battlemages?

>> No.31373477


I love that catgirls are a thing in 40k now. Almost as much as I love the semantic gymnastics the grognards pull to try to deny it. mfw

>> No.31373504


>> No.31373520

What are you talking about? This is the bizarro/tg/.

>> No.31373523


If they use magic to fight, or piss around with divination, or any other Tzeentch-tier bullshit, they'll probably end up Spawned into a writhing pile of smelly limp dicks and used as cannon fodder.

>> No.31373565

Katia is a beastman, not a felinid.

This is a felinid.

>> No.31373601

No, those are Abominable Intelligences dressed up as felinids.

>> No.31373637

Chaos is for cowards. Stand firm and give them no quarter and you will prevail.

>> No.31373685

I know what you mean. I'm going to make me some Enforcers for the guard army I'm building.

>> No.31373692

Actually, they are Schrödinger's catgirls.
While they cannot be observed (that is, they remain just one line of fluff with no description of what they actually look like), we only know they are something about cat and person. Probably hairy/furry, too.
They will only collapse into one canonic state when observed (that is, actually described/depicted).

So right now there is no right or wrong. So they are at th same time to be assumed to be all possible representations.

>> No.31373873


.Schrodinger's Catgirls

Great, now they're in everything and nothing at the same time, by default.

>> No.31373937

>You will never plow a cultist so hard her hips break
Would she like that?

>> No.31374208

As a Guardsman, never have I been tempted so badly to try and bring a Cultist to the light of the Emperor.

Usually it is by Lasgun, but this... This is different.

>Compelled to do writefaggotry

>> No.31374264

Dooooooo iiiiiiiiit.

>> No.31374481

Chaos Gods of Order exist in Fantasy.

One is a Snow White Malice stole, one helps Sigmar reincarnate to kill Everchosens and guides Witch Hunters to heretics, and one out ALL ACCORDING TO PLANs Tzeentch Morai-Heg and Loec all at the same time.

>> No.31374529

Fetch muh' crossbow junior.

There's Vampuhres about.

>> No.31374589

Would she be afraid of Karl Franz?
He's hard to tell apart from the guys around him other than having a wreath on his helmet.

>> No.31374625

High Elves here, Bretonnians are battle brothers.

Eldar are losers. Ultramarines are wannabe High Elves.

>> No.31374716

Khorne has a Blood Bowl team, so Fantasy Bloodletterchan is a sporty chick.

Carnival of Chaos means that Unclean Onechan is an actress.

Since Fantasy Chinese worship Tzeentch, Tzeentchchan will cook for you and provide a massage with a happy infinite time loop.

Slaanesh is worshipped by Dark Elves, so it's an open marriage with doms and slaves for all.

>> No.31374819

Xeno is Khalida's adopted daughter in Fantasy.

Rather than robotics, she's a skeleton encased in magic moving porcelain like the girl from the Wizard of Oz prequel.

>> No.31374853

It was a bad movie. That's it

The animation was shoddy, the songs were terrible, and it was boring.

Watch Tangled and Princess and the Frog, skip Frozen entirely.

>> No.31374856

>Unclean Onechan
>not Unclean Onee-chan

>> No.31374892

Lore of Fire or Metal spellcasters should be acceptable as blacksmiths channeling Khorne's more creative side.

>> No.31374937

Beastmen are mutated humans, Khajit are born of the moon.

Chaos Khajit are born under Morrsleib, regular Khajit under Mannsleib.

>> No.31375044


I always figured it would be done by people who don't cast spells directly, but use rituals and daemonic implements instead.

In fact it wouldn't surprise me if they made Daemon weapons the hard way - beating the shit out of a Daemon and brute-forcing it into a blade.

>> No.31375072

I like it.

Incidentally, she is still a tau thanks to Warp fuckery.

>> No.31375118

>Since Fantasy Chinese worship Tzeentch, Tzeentchchan will cook for you and provide a massage with a happy infinite time loop.
>no naked apron

I bet Khornette would do the naked apron.
Dammit, now I need pictures of naked apron Khornette

>> No.31375149

Or Fantasy Tau are the Chinese.
Giant terracotta battlesuits, legions of archers, monks, very controlling ruling class, Chinese traded with Egypt in real life, etc
That way the two could meet.

>> No.31375260

Terracotta? That works, that allows for hips.

>> No.31375851

K: Period All day
T: She be playing you dog
S: may or maynot be a Trap

>> No.31375962

>S: may or maynot be a Trap
More like is a strung out whore who you only think is good because she is hooking you on all the same drugs that burned her out into the hollow shell she is now.

>> No.31375963

She can detect nobility by instinct.

She's scared speechless by martin in the kvatch walkaround

>> No.31376027

>S: may or maynot be a Trap
>This is bad

>> No.31376055

>S: may or maynot be a Trap

>> No.31376082


>> No.31376089

That's just it. She's the one you want less, and it can change depending on your current desire.

>> No.31376099

see >>31375962
Slaanyfags dont even know their own god I swear.

>> No.31376104

In another thread, dear anon


>> No.31376164

>this guy again
The lore states the major ones are anrdoyginist and beautiful. I swear you need to get over your transphobia and exept people like that stuff

>inb4 that same (outdated) image of slaanesh

>> No.31376192

I don't think you do. Read the Tome of Excess or Liber Chaotica and get over your weird beef with trans/futa

>> No.31376317

They're Gods of Order, not Chaos Gods of Order. They're the exact opposite of Chaos.

>> No.31376334

Both of which state Slaanesh is all about addiction and excess. Yeah, the daemonette will have that dick you crave so much, but it'll also turn you into a hollow shell of a man who cant stop committing more and more depraved acts of debauchery.

>> No.31376352

Indeed, and what's wrong with feminine Daemonettes anyways?
Personally, I prefer tentacle vagina to plain old penises anyday...

>> No.31376358

Why not both?

>> No.31376388

>Both of which state Slaanesh is all about addiction and excess
You clearly didn't read it if you think sex is irrelivant. Ritcher Kless describes very well the Palion of Desires where daemonettes bang guys forever with lewd acts in a plane of pillows, and how he got REALLY turned on by it.

Don't act you know what your are talking about dumbass

>> No.31376394

So, /tg/, what's your favourite method of suicide?

>> No.31376415

A slow but sure deadly intake of Life

>> No.31376417

*Pavilion of the Sublime

>> No.31376429

Insulting a dwarf's beard.

>> No.31376439


>> No.31376463

>You clearly didn't read it if you think sex is irrelivant.
>committing more and more depraved acts of debauchery.
I already covered that, dumbass. All I was saying that claiming the absolute worst a daemonette could do is have a dick is whitewashing Slaanesh entirely. Much like how Nurglefags try to downplay Nurgle as a kindly ol grandpa who just wants what's best for his children, Slaaneshfags always try to downplay Slaanesh as just a little kinky and misunderstood.

>> No.31376480

Surfing a baneblade from orbit into a Chaos Titan's cockpit and killing everyone involved while balls deep in a canoness

>> No.31376493

>implying I'm not
>implying I don't
>alright you've got me one that one
>implying I even let them take the cast off after the first time

>> No.31376495

That one where you find a tall building next to a basketball court, go to the top, tie steel wire around your neck and to the building, superglue your hands to the sides of your head, jump off and aim for a hoop. The steel wire severs your neck and it looks like you tried to dunk your head.

>> No.31376497

>I already covered that, dumbass. All I was saying that claiming the absolute worst a daemonette could do is have a dick is whitewashing Slaanesh entirely. Much like how Nurglefags try to downplay Nurgle as a kindly ol grandpa who just wants what's best for his children, Slaaneshfags always try to downplay Slaanesh as just a little kinky and misunderstood.

>Not getting that Chaos is made of positive AND negative aspects

I'll get you two tickets to retard town

>> No.31376503

Step 1. Obtain a long length of razor wire.
Step 2. Go to the top of a tall building.
Step 3. Tie a noose out of the razor wire around your neck.
Step 4. Jump off. Get decapitated.
Alternatively, shotgun mouthwash. Very hard to fuck up.

>> No.31376505


>Tzeentch just likes a few pranks now and then
>Khorne just has a bit of an anger problem

>> No.31376520

Six Circle of Seduction:
-Carnality (fan-fave)

>> No.31376532


>> No.31376537

>trying to up play the positive aspects of one while emphasizing the negative aspects of the others
Gonna be a long trip to retard town, sitting beside yourself with your own idiocy like that.

>> No.31376554

And it's impossible to take the positive without the negative, so ignoring the negatives is folly.

>> No.31376576

>The Shattered Causeway
I bet Khorne has some real radicool road race riots there. Imagine that one escort mission in Brutal Legend, but with less escorting and more exploding demon bikers.

>> No.31376580

>1 image > A whole book

>> No.31376625

>Don't act you know what your are talking about dumbass
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

>> No.31376706

Oxygen poisoning.

>> No.31376779

I could see it going either way: Chaos is on the defensive much more often in 40k than in WHFB.

>> No.31376824

Wouldn't that be exploding?

>> No.31376830

What exactly is a tentacle vagina?

>> No.31376869

Or scuba diving too deep.

>> No.31376891

A tentacle you can penetrate

>> No.31376899

Well that's the beauty of Vagina Anemone; almost anything a plain penis can do, a Tentacle can do BETTER!

And when both parties have a set, it's like frenching with your nethers!

To be fair, the Plane of Pillows is fucking AWESOME!

But we just want you to feel ALIVE anon...

>> No.31376900


>> No.31376916

No, it's called old age.
Cellular degeneration is the result of damage to the telomeres that cap each strand of DNA inflicted by oxygen free radicals, an occasional byproduct of cellular respiration.Every breath brings you closer to the grave.

>> No.31376944

Actually, it's mostly tentacles surrounding the lips of a vagina...

Orifices on tentacles is a bit more of an advanced gift, since you need more and larger tentacles.

>> No.31376958

Ah, foolish daemonette, trying to convince me that physical pleasures are worth anything when I can shoot lightning out of my fingers.

Fuck you, successful wealthy people who bullied me in high school and married superstars! Zappy magicks!

>> No.31376965

Don't humor him, anon.

>> No.31376990

What is the point of electrical discharge if you don't have someone to share it with?

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