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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.31060251 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!!
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!!

>> No.31060280

>> No.31060319

>>31060251
WATER FOR THE WATER NYMPH!

>> No.31060326

Milk for the Khorne Flakes!

>> No.31060336

DRINKS FOR THE FIESTA!!!

>> No.31060339

>>31060251
HARRIERS FOR THE CUP!

Naw but seriously you guys are okay, let's head over to the Tengaren Sector and order fifty thousand cheeseburgers.

>> No.31060347

PILLOWS FOR THE NAPPIES!

>> No.31060375

HAIL CHAOS

>> No.31060399

>>31060251
Harriers for the cup

>> No.31060403

>>31060326

Lame jokes for the faggot god

>> No.31060406

>>31060251

Stool hardner for the lord of plague!

Because, it literally just will not stop on its own and its sort of hard to really plan anything being hip deep in Nurgle shits.

>> No.31060426

>>31060326

I tried these, and they did make bloody war on my gastro intestinal regions.

>> No.31060441 [DELETED] 

Goats for the truck god!

>> No.31060459

TITS FOR THE TIT GOD

>> No.31060468

>>31060406
In the grimdarkness of the far future, is it bright enough that they do not have MREs?

I have 11 of these if anybody wants me to dump them.

>> No.31060479

>>31060459
Enjoy that ban buddy.

>> No.31060490

Khorne is having a fucking giggle, m8. The faithful r twat him 1.

>> No.31060522

>>31060459
>he actually got banned
>for only tits

>> No.31060529

>>31060468

You forgot to eat the 'gum' that comes with them MREs didn't you? They used to put a cancerous petrol chemical in it as an artificial sweetener. When an infantry man was able to shit in safety (cause tactical shitting is never any fun and largely a wasted effort) you'd just pop those, chew them for a bit, then about an hour later you'd shit the length of your large intestine, at least. Also, you need to drink about two gallons a water a day if consuming just a MRE per day.

>> No.31060549

>>31060529
Oh, no. I just collected these from /k/. Was that a yes, no, or neutral to posting the rest?

>> No.31060575

>>31060479
w-what did they post...?

>> No.31060590

>>31060575
just a blue, slaaneshi girl, laying upside down. Only tits could be seen as "naughty"

>> No.31060622

>>31060468
MOAR

>> No.31060628

>>31060622

>> No.31060657

>>31060628

>> No.31060663

>>31060251
does khorne care from where the blood flow and from who the skulls are taken?
I mean, are there things like khorne's favourite skulls and blood?

>> No.31060673

>>31060657

>> No.31060684

>>31060673

>> No.31060694

>>31060684

>> No.31060697

These are glorious.
FUCK HERESY. HAIL MRE.

>> No.31060712

>>31060694

>> No.31060717

>MRE stories
Now I'm really curious and want to try one.

>> No.31060735

>>31060712

>>31060717
Go for the vegetable omelet.

I'm joking. Don't even touch it.

>> No.31060746

>>31060717
They are good if you plan to go camping or need to prep for a worst case scenario

for standard consumption I would advise against

>> No.31060760

>>31060735

>> No.31060776

>>31060760

>>31060746
Yeah. If you do want to eat one, eat lots of fibre before and after and drink lots of water.

>> No.31060788

>>31060776
MRE story shit done.

>> No.31060822

>>31060717
MREs are normally good, depending on the country though. Or if it's a quick ration MRE or a full lunch type.
A buddy of mine got a shitload of them and I took some when I went camping/hiking a few times, just for teh lulz.
Stories like that are exagarated and happen because you only eat that for a prolonged period of time, probably too much than regulated and not mixing them up too. Otherwise they are completely harmless

>> No.31060874

>>31060822
Yeah. Different countries have different rations.

>> No.31060879

>>31060822
Shit, I forgot how to English with the sentences. Oh well, it's still readable.

>> No.31060926

>>31060874
Ye. I've eaten Slovene (my country), German (got them from some joint ops exercises) and American (got them from USA officers stationed here).
All 3 were good, couldn't really pick a favorite one.

>> No.31060958

>>31060926
Fuck, just realized this is my last SFW board Khorne pic

>> No.31060968

>>31060926
I personally find the history behind military rations, tv dinners, and other preserved foods like that to be fascinating. It really is something to see how far we have come with just this stuff.

>> No.31061012

>>31060694
>>31060712
Holy fuck my brother is looking at me like I'm a retard but I can't stop laughing.

>> No.31061018

>>31060968

I'm wondering if it's worth joining the Army just so I can become a DI and fuck with people as my job.

>> No.31061035

>>31060879
>thinks chaos if good guys, imperium is bad guys
>makes mary-sue khornate human
>uses fucking AMERICAN ICONOGRAPHY to advertise how good and noble these glorious chaos footsoldiers are
My sides. Every time I see that.

>> No.31061046

>>31061018
I don't know the process on that but if you make it, share stories with /k/.

>> No.31061052

>>31060874

I'm Singaporean, and let me tell you - MREs get old fast. They all end up universally having the texture of vomit.

When I was in NS, my first time on field camp, I literally ate nothing except biscuits for five days. I was light-headed and groggy by the end of it...AND I STILL COULDN'T SHIT.

>> No.31061073

>>31061046

I'd be the guy /k/ommandos would make stories about.

Though I myself am an out of shape wimp. I am a pretty good shot though.

>> No.31061100

>>31061035
I like Imperium and think serving Chaos is stupid.
But if I'd have to choose, I'd choose Khorn.
Not a fan of the Iwo Jima pose myself, but I liked the picture nonetheless

>> No.31061120

At this office I worked at, I was unfortunate enough to have a front row seat of the corridor of the toilets for a few months before I got an office.

The funniest thing I ever saw was this little Paki engineer from another department come tearing around the corner at the opposite end from me, clutching his arse, stomach and making faces best described as HNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGNNNNGGG!
He's not going to make it
But he will make it to the handicapped toilet, so he lays his shoulder into the door and there's a clattering of the seat.
>Well done bro

Some 20-30min later he staggers out, sweating like a pig with a much relieved look on his face just as one of our accountants comes around the corner, pegging it along on his crutches in a hurry.
Don't like the guy, sure, he's a cripple, but he's an angry cripple that's hard to deal with that made my reporting girl cry once and in this case, he's an angry cripple in need of a shit.
He gives the engineer an angry look on the way past coming out of the handicapped shitter.
>This will be good

He flings open the door with a crutch
>BAM
A mix of curry, rotten meat and beans punches him in the face, to the point he gags
Then he falls over trying to simultaneously swear, vomit and avoid shitting himself at the same time.
"FUCKENCUUUUN RAAAALLGGGG NT, FILTHY NIGG AAAAARRRROOOGH"
>Pretend to work

It was at the point he shat himself, that I also lost my shit and had to duck down under the desk, pretending to pick something up and biting my thumb so hard that I cried.

>> No.31061143

>>31061073
Well, at least we'd have both sides of the story.

>> No.31061156

>>31060874
Those Dutch ones don't look too bad.

And Canadians get fuckin' kit-kats?

>> No.31061194

>>31060874
All of those look pretty good all things considered, except the Russian and Chinese ones.

>> No.31061221

>>31061156
Yeah, some MREs come with candy. One I had had these small, hard cinnamon bites. Can't remember what they were called exactly.

>> No.31061290

>>31061221
I love it when /k/ and /tg/ come together.

It's fuckin' hilarious

>> No.31061299

My dad used to work with the Army Cadets in the UK, and he'd bring home those MREs all the time. That stuff wasn't all bad, and you got those Yorkie chocolate bars with them, which were my favourite sweets as a lad. I hated the Toffee Pudding, because that shit was so fucking heavy in your stomach after eating it. I also ate that stuff you mix with water to make fruit juice, which probably wasn't that smart of an idea at the time. That shit tasted like battery acid, and was probably why I ended up with several fillings by the time I was 11.

Good memories, though.

>> No.31061308

>>31061035
>to advertise how good and noble these chaos footsoldiers are
I'm not sure how you came to that conclusion considering they're hideous scarred Khornate soldiers.

And why is using AMERICAN ICONOGRAPHY such a big deal? Nothing's sacred.

>> No.31061445

>>31061299
Ex Air Cadet here, the Yorkie bars were the best. I seem to remember the MRE's being pretty good, although seeing as we only ate them as part of fieldcraft lessons I never got to experience the full horror described by other anons.

>>31060529

British MRE's come with two types of crackers. Allegedly, one of the biscuits (which comes in a brown package) is designed to induce constipation to prevent the aforementioned tactical shitting, and the other (which comes in a purple one) is supposed to loosen you up once it's safe to take a dump.
I take it with a pinch of salt, however, as the staff at my Air Cadet Squadron fed us some serious bullshit over the years, and I've never signed up to find out for myself.

>> No.31061466

>>31061290
It is.

>> No.31061609

>>31061221
[Laughter Intensifies]

>> No.31061672

oh god I'm dying
>be reading this thread, laughing like a retard because fuck it, I live alone
>knock on the door
>neighbor asking what the noise is
>crack up on the spot, I'm fucking crying
>explain it was some story about a guy taking a monster shit that scared off a bear
>guy nods
>says "sounds like some serious shit" and heads back to his condo
>I'm back here, lungs gone

>> No.31062241

>>31061672
>MFW

>> No.31063052

Oh god I cannot stop laughing. What the fuck? fa/tg/uys diverting from Khorne worship to shit stories.

fa/tg/uys seriously what the fuck?

>> No.31063101

>>31063052
/tg/ and /k/ have a lot of crossboard interaction.

>> No.31063157

>>31063052
/tg/ is a beautiful place.

>> No.31063740

>>31060958
Is that a bullpup AK? horrifing

>> No.31063754

>>31063157
Rationalism is a very, very old game.

>> No.31063766

>>31063740
No, it is a bullpup bolter.

>> No.31063824

>>31063766
I was in that thread, yet I think this gif is stupid.
Stupid ameri/k/unts changing it from bull pup

>> No.31063857

>>31063824
You do realize that in the default configuration, it's physically impossible for the shells to reach the firing chamber?
Just asking.

>> No.31063908

>>31063857
Yeah, I know that. Just saying that they could have kept it a bull pup.

>> No.31067443

Just gonna bump dis in here then

What is the difference between to fights who love nothing more than to kill and cause death; their only difference is that one worships Khorne while the other worships Slaanesh.

It is said that many of Khorne's followers not only kill out of hatred but out of the joy of battle and death; were as a warrior of slaanesh would pretty much have the same motivations.(Assuming taking life is their vice and they feel sensation from it just as a noise marine would while booming away with his sonic blaster). The between worship would blur between the two as they would be empowering both gods. Yet BECAUSE they're empowering both, it would enrage them both most likely since Khorne and Slaanesh fucking hate each other.

>>
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