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[ERROR] No.30642711 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Wood Elves > Dark Elves > shit > all other elves

>> No.30642744


High/Dark/Wood Elf females > shit > elf males

>> No.30642868

Wood elves are only cool when they're savage and tribal, and like to eat their fallen enemies and have massive fertility festival orgies that are also barbecues in which delicious grilled orc flesh is served.

>> No.30646955

Everything >>> /d/row.

Fuck Drow and their entire fucking Mary Sue race.
Not in the sexual way either.

>> No.30647070

Balkan elves.

>> No.30647084


>> No.30647117

my nigga. Dorf stronk.

>> No.30647164

You forgot tropical island elves. But otherwise not bad.

>> No.30647668

I hate this copy pasta.

>> No.30647816


>> No.30648733

Wood elves are the absolute worst kind of elves. Dark elves are also fairly boring, but they at least are done interesting some of the time.

>> No.30648752

I could kill that guar. These boots are ruined!

>> No.30648757

I like the High Elves when they are knightly and bad ass like pic related

>> No.30649111

But that's a dwarfs weapon!

>> No.30649266

if by Dwarf you mean bad ass lion slaying Elf then yes

>> No.30649409

I don't play warhammer but the chariot drawn by lions is badass.

>> No.30649526

So much yes!

>> No.30650854

Dead elf is best elf.

Fucking buncha prissy wankers prancing around in nature, could do science in their nearly endless life-spans, but instead they bitch and fuck trees for centuries.

>> No.30650997

What about sea elves?

Also why all the hate on Drow? I understand the Mary Sue thing, but what makes High Elves unlike the Mary Sue stuff?

>> No.30651046

What about Scottish elves with large beards taht think armor is for pussies?

>> No.30651088

There are a lot of faggot dorw out there, but they are basically intelligent niggers that back stab you with poisoned daggers. They can be done good, as a race, if the writer is not an elf fag.
Drizzt. Faggot writer ruined Drow wit his bullshit.

>> No.30651126

Drow typically draw all the sues. They're still an interesting race, they just require the exact opposite of the actual roleplayer they need. Any good drow, or non-evil drow for that matter should just be purged from existence, and the people who play them have their hands broken.

>> No.30651141

>That dress

>> No.30651145

>require the exact opposite of the actual roleplayer they

*get, rather.

>> No.30651150


>> No.30651174


>> No.30651238

Axes really make little sense as a dwarf weapon. Warhammer, war picks, spears and shortswords make far more sense.

>> No.30651341

I don't want to derail this thread into another dorf wank but does the association of dwarfs with axes solely come from Gimli? It certainly wouldn't really be usefull for dwarfs.

>> No.30651477

Would female wood elves have delicious armpits like patti smith and be high all the time on shrooms and plants ?

>> No.30651604


>Would kill orcs and make junkie elf ska with

>> No.30651620

I thought that's how all wood elves were like...

>> No.30651640


In WH fnatasy they are exactly like high elves but in a forest.

>> No.30651656

>nerds still believing that elves don't belong in grand cities crafted by their own skilled hands
>degenerates still insisting that elves don't spend their spare time battling demons, beasts, and the vast legions of Evil commanded by a Dark God.

Shiggy diggy, teeg. Shiggy diggy.

>> No.30651659

Pfeh, dwarves are flat, overused and boring. I'm not saying that elves are good. But there are more possible personalities than "short, angry, alcoholic, bearded."

>> No.30651675

Eh. Didn't Salvatore pretty much come up with the Drow?
If so, he didn't exactly ruin them, as they were bad from the start.

>> No.30651676

Yeah well it's too bad 90% of all fantasy stories and games depict elves as complete and utter faggots who just love to stroke their dicks off at how AMAZING AND AWESOME they are.

>> No.30651700

And because of it, the dwarfs of the Hobbit use them too.

I just hope the dwarfs of the third film will be armed with polearms, just like in the book. Because organised legions of dwarf pikemen is an awesome idea.

>> No.30651711

Orcs>ogres>humans>anything else

>> No.30651719

Pff. Nargothrond > Gondolin

But yeah, I agree. Ultracivilized or savage. Those are the two choices.

>> No.30651729

>Pfeh, dwarves are flat, overused and boring. I'm not saying that elves are good. But there are more possible personalities than "short, angry, alcoholic, bearded."

I have yet to read a single fantasy novel or RPG setting where that is the case. You people complaining about dwarves have no idea what you are talking about.

>> No.30651734

Guys... Guys... What about... MONGOL ELVES ?!

>> No.30651738

>Most stories are bad
>ergo, the concepts used in those stories are bad

Anon, doesn't that mean that all grains are shit because legions of low-quality desserts exist, though?
I feel like it's a little unfair to condemn ingredients for the failings of the cooks, ya dig?

>> No.30651741

>Ultracivilized or savage
>Not both

>> No.30651757

Umm. Lord of the Rings? And all that derive from it.
Admittedly, the alcohol part came later. But flat, short and angry was there. Oh. And I forgot greedy.

>> No.30651759

Dark elves aren't savage at all. They're fucking evil, but not savage. They torture children, rape babies and slaughter innocents with class.

>> No.30651769

Hmm. Yes. I phrased it badly, didn't mean to imply that those were mutually exclusive.

>> No.30651772

>Nargothrond vs Gondolin

My take on it? Finrod Felagund > Turgon, but Gondolin > Nargothrond, imo.

Finrod is Best Elfking, but Gondolin just seemed like a superior grand city.

Finrod was definitely great, though.

>> No.30651779

I don't like it because the Gondolin elves were just shutting themselves away from the world, trying to ignore it.

>> No.30651785


And they have sexy witches wandering in the nude. THE NUDE.

>> No.30651787

I totally homebrewed a race of nomadic horse archer elves.

>They torture children, rape babies and slaughter innocents with class.
That's my point

>> No.30651790


>wood elves
>better than dark elves

get a load of this n'wah

>> No.30651837

>wood elf
>using fire
Wouldn't they abhor it?

>> No.30651872

Raped Elves>Dead Elves>All other elves

>> No.30651875

Sometimes they have to set the woods aflame to blame the humans.

>> No.30651879

He ruined perfectly cool concept. Concept was good, just he twisted it into shit. Same with my little pony, they have fucking immortal rulers who body graft parts from all races on them, to show their superiority and control celestial bodies, to scorch the earth, or bring eternal night, and imprisons her enemies in stone, wile keeping their conscience, or banishing relatives to moon, but what they do with it? Make her read letters about dumb asperger's wizard. Original is meh, but the idea can be good.
If you can take shit out from other media, and make it better, just do it.

>> No.30651910

>high all the time on shrooms and plants
This is actually a really good idea for Wood Elves all around.

>> No.30651918

Oh for fucks sake. It's a kid's story.

If you want to play with the concepts, write a story yourself. Or commission it from someone, if you can't.

>> No.30651925

And you can totally bang your sister/cousin and nobody would mind.

Also Insomnia's a hell of a drug.

>> No.30651932

>Hillbilly Elves
>Above Anything

>> No.30651937

Umm I am doing it? I am just explaining how concept can be good, even if main character is fucking Drizzt.

>> No.30651955

So. If I get this right, you are complaining that someone else wrote a kids story instead of making it for adults?

>> No.30651968

In the Hobbit the dwarves have distinct personalities. You cannot use Lord of the Rings as an example because you only see one of them for most of the book. And even in LOTR there was more to Gimli than that.

>> No.30651979


At least I won't betray the empire for chaos.

>> No.30651981

It's a kid's story, yes.

Does it mean it has to be shit, though?

>> No.30651986

Dwemer > Orsimer > shit > all other elves

>> No.30651992

Snow elves are pretty cool though.

>> No.30651995

No. In the Hobbit Thorin had a personality, which was "is a noble", Dvalin also had the personality "second in command", and Bombur had "fat and whiny."

>> No.30652003

No, but it doesn't need to play up all of the horrifying consequences of how it all is. It evidentially works in-setting.

>> No.30652035

Dullaelf are better.

>> No.30652044

This, very much. Hobbit is so short there isn't really time to establish personalities.

>> No.30652045


You talking shit about Thurin m8 ?!

>> No.30652097

Still patently absurd to claim the typical fantasy dwarf is nothing but beards, drinking and being angry.

>> No.30652109

Fili and Kili are young and cheery.

>> No.30652115

Bitch, please.

>> No.30652122

Young, I admit. Although I think loyal is closer than cheery.

>> No.30652123

Tolkien elves could be cool if they didn't look like faggots and dress like women.

Sorry, but I can't take even Glorfindel seriously as he's fighting the balrog wearing a fucking skirt. I wouldn't be surprised if he had high heels under it, maybe some cotton panties and a garter? What a bunch of faggots, Jesus H Christ.

>> No.30652131

No, I'm talking shit about the novelette format. Doesn't really allow for characterization except for one or two characters, if you still want a story.

>> No.30652140

I've seen enough hentai...

>> No.30652155

>Didn't Salvatore pretty much come up with the Drow?
No, he fucking well didn't. Gygax did. They were introduced in 1e modules he wrote. Salvatore just wrote a book with a good drow in it.

>> No.30652178

The Hobbit is not a 'novelette', its 300 pages long.

>> No.30652206

Tolkien wasn't trying to fucking write a character driven story. He was trying to write an ADVENTURE story, where the THINGS THAT HAPPEN are more important than the people involved.

>> No.30652233

The fuck he didn't. He wrote a story about how a lazy-ass hobbit became a great adventurer.

>> No.30652246

Dude. My paperback version is 260, and those are usually thicker, due to the smaller size of each page.

>> No.30652255

Dark elves are way better than wood elves

>> No.30652347

I really wish elves weren't so goddamn gay. It'd be nice to be able to play a magically attuned race that wasn't so fucking cock-hungry and cum-thirsty.

>> No.30652350

He was trying to write a fairy tale. He succeeded. Fairy tales are all meandering and have flat or archetypal characters. The fact that the dwarves mostly lack any defining features and are hard to tell apart is a running gag.

>> No.30652376

Bilbo's the main character, of course he's going to have some personality. DOES ANYONE ELSE IN THE STORY HAVE ANY? No, they don't.

>> No.30652437

Savage wood elf is best elf.


>> No.30652487

Why not both?

>> No.30652489

You actually can. You just have not to be gay ass elf. I know everyone thinks, that you need to be pompos cok hungry bitch to play elf, but you can play it however you want.Look up information on fey. Same ting, but less fag.(man I just realized fairies are less gay than elves).

>> No.30652500

Too bad with the retarded weapon he uses. Otherwise it'd be a cool picture.

>> No.30652505

One word: Fëanor.

>> No.30652527

I am not disagreeing with you. It looks bette ron the model though. Then again, the avatar of the god of hunting can afford some extravagant god-given gear.

>> No.30652547

Night Elves are pretty cool. Too bad they completely ruined Tyrande in MoP.

>> No.30652578

Same reason jellybeans and fried liver don't go together either.

>> No.30652597

They were better as fighters and druids were seperated by sex.

>> No.30652614


the OP is seriously lacking in references to high elves

>dat calaquendi

>> No.30652628

Agreed. They were great in WC3, the WoW version is... Lacking.

Here's to hoping to the new models being good.

>> No.30652647

it's not a fucking skirt


>> No.30652650

They are both wearing dresses. And as far I remember Fëanor was the master mcguffin maker.

>> No.30652652


>> No.30652665

see >>30652647

>> No.30652678

The artist also completely fucked up the perspective on the spear.

>> No.30652704

It would have gap in middle then. Also feathers and boa.

>> No.30652707

I'm sorry, I can't imagine someone who is consistently described as hugely muscular, broad-shouldered and fire-scarred as feminine.

>> No.30652736


>> No.30652754


>> No.30652776

pictured here: feanor cleaving his way through some balrogs


>> No.30652812

Musclegirl hijack?

>> No.30652828

Jeanne d'Arc looking manlier than he is.

>> No.30652852

Well we do need more elf muscle girls. Playing female elf bodybuilder could be fun.

>> No.30652882

Jagárhí > Wood Elves > all other Elves > shit > Dark Elves

>> No.30652884


>> No.30652913

Problem is that even elves who try to look manly fail at it.

>> No.30652922

anybody who doesn't understand how superior high elves are needs to read the silmarillion

and stop posting your shit posts until you do

>> No.30652931

>Dark elves
>Picture of an elf who has been dipped in tea

>> No.30652933

But its boring as fuck. And yes I have red some of it.

>> No.30652941

Nice try, Anons. Go back to...I dunno, wherever you hail from, I guess.

>> No.30652956

That' because Japan cannot into drow.

>> No.30652963

see >>30652941

also, >>30652941
here's my favorite pic of mablung
>flipped it so he's right handed, lefty swords always look weird to me

>> No.30652968

No one is arguing that it isn't boring.
It's like a history textbook that puts extra emphasis on trees and stars and radiant beauty.

>> No.30652997 [SPOILER] 

>not so clever samefagging
please leave

>> No.30653001

Pretty cool, Anon

>> No.30653014

>epic battles


I'd accuse you of being a child, but even children like stories.

>> No.30653017

Don't elves have muscles of steel and the reflexes of a jungle cat? They can look as gay as they want, they will still fuck you up.

>> No.30653023

Good. They gave us brown elves instead.

>> No.30653025

>What about sea elves?
Dividing elves up in subraces based on the environment they live in is one of the things I hate the most about elves in today's fantasy. Like, I can understand having something like light elves, grey elves and dark elves, but not if that is indicative of their skin color. Dark elves actually being dark and ligth elves being pale and all glowy is so fucking dumb and unimaginative. There are so many other things that could be the case for terms like that, but ever since D&D it's been all huurr dark elf has dark skin huuhhhhhuuu.

That said, elves that sail alot are much better than elves that climb trees alot.

>> No.30653028

Whiner works.

And the will of a minor god. That's really the most important one.

>> No.30653059

In fairness, the Edain also had pretty superhuman physical stats. They all fucked up orcs and dark things left and right

>> No.30653081

How big is an elf dick?

>> No.30653082 [SPOILER] 

the problem is you're confusing being graceful and precise with being effeminate

the reason elves are precise is because they practice doing shit for hundreds and hundreds of years.
they're so good at some things that the results they're able to produce look like magic to the mortal races

they are also concretely magic, like being able to walk on top of snow without crushing it, or tanking balrog hits (or making silmarils, but this gets away from my first point)

>> No.30653100

Since they are supposed to be perfect? Probably pretty big.

>> No.30653103

Hoping for those claw hands on Tyrande and Illidan.

>> No.30653109

Big enough to shatter orc skulls

>> No.30653112


Elves have duck dicks.

They look like micropenises until they're actually inserted, whereupon they explode to fully fill the vagina.

>> No.30653117

>Elves are supposed to be perfect
>Huge dicks on the men
>Tight pussies on the women
>You now know why they have so much trouble breeding

>> No.30653124

They're long and curved, made for stimulating multiple elf g-spots.

>> No.30653127

>tanking balrog hits

I'll rek u m8 i sware on me mum

>> No.30653135

I just hope for warblades. There are quite a few of them around, and I'd really like a set that isn't as humongous as the warglaives of Azzinoth.

>> No.30653152

Also ribbed and vibrating.

>> No.30653155

true, and the numenorians even more so (granted longer life and greater stature/lore/magic)

>> No.30653159


>> No.30653163


Elven women as a result have multi-passage vaginas, which means sex between a female Elf and male non-Elf is only possible when the Elf is aroused enough to straighten her passage.

This gave rise to the old adage, "It's not rape if it's an Elf," as the very act of penetration means the encounter is consensual.

>> No.30653167

I like the Eldar physiological explanation in that elf couples need to have multiple insemination sessions over several months to successfully conceive.

>> No.30653172

There are plenty of fantasy settings where the dark/evil elves have light skin like regular elves. And sea elves are elves that live underwater and have gills a lot of the time.

>> No.30653176

God, glaives would be fucking awesome, as well. I'm still waiting for fucking totems for tauren though. :I

>> No.30653177

>clearly has never read the silmarillion
just stop

>> No.30653180

>multiple elf g-spots

>> No.30653184


>> No.30653197

>being a dick
>on the internet

How could you, Anon?!

>> No.30653198

Too bad they scrapped the idea they had back in Alpha, when shamans would be carrying their totems around when deployed. Would've been really cool.

>> No.30653199

>casuals talking about elf dicks

>> No.30653219

Stand up. You were dreaming. What's your name?

>> No.30653224

But anons... Brown elves have existed since the earliest days of D&D.
In fact in some of the 1e books it describes a nation founded by evil moon elves and drow, and how now the elves from that region have brown skin.

Then there's also the fact that "Green elves" or "savage elves" also have dark brown skin.

>> No.30653229

>Poor Little Elf Boy

>> No.30653235

>And sea elves are elves that live underwater and have gills a lot of the time.
So mermaids? Then no. Call them mermaids in that case.

>> No.30653242

Why aren't there any deliciously brown male elves with perfectly aesthetic, efficiently muscular bodies, long, flowing silvery blonde hair and fat brown cocks?

>> No.30653246

When's Almasexia?

>> No.30653250

>thinks being on the internet gives you the right to be an ass

/tg/ is going the way of /co/

I'm trying to enjoy what little time we have left

>> No.30653254


I've always seen a difference between scary half-feral brown elves from DnD and the hyper-sexual, idealized-pacific-islander style brown elves of anime.

>> No.30653255

So where is the porn of them?

>> No.30653262

Oh. Sure. But 90+% of all brown elf porn is because Japan doesn't seem to like the idea of purple-black drow.

>> No.30653272

I wasn't being sarcastic; I genuinely frown upon Anon's being jerks, Anon.

>> No.30653274


Anal Thunder.

>> No.30653283

No, elves with legs who live underwater, often in the same setting as mermaids but distinct from them.

>> No.30653288


Same reason why they gave all their Elves massive ears; cultural inclinations.

It is telling then of Japan's influence on nerd culture that both their portrayal of Brown Elves and of how big Elven ears should be has become more or less the majority opinion.

Unless you're going to tell me more people see Brown Elves as wild elves or Elven ears should be, oh I don't know, classical Tolkien-sized.

>> No.30653289

underage b8 leave now

>> No.30653294

>obsessed with jewelry
>led astray over drama involving a tall, dark, powerful demigod
>prone to emotional outbursts, holding grudges, and general bitchiness

Pretty sure the Feanster is the biggest faggot of all, son.

>> No.30653297

They're busy raiding orc warcamps and feasting on delicious orc brains and hearts to gain the courage and wisdom of their foes.

>> No.30653302

No, those are still mermaids, anon.

>> No.30653311


Where are you trying to go with this.

Are you suggesting that the brown elves of 1e have the same inclinations of your average Japanese brown elf?

>> No.30653315

>implying Tolkien isn't far and away Best Elves

>> No.30653332

I don't need to be on the internet to have the right to be an ass.

But it certaintly helps.

>> No.30653334


Um...I've got awful news, buddy...

>> No.30653336

Yes, elves in western fantasy RPG's and stories still have Tolkein/DnD style elf ears not huge ones most of the time. And 'wild elves' are just as likely to be various shades of tanned/yellow or various shades of green as brown depending on where you look.

>> No.30653345

Are you being an idiot on purpose?

>> No.30653350

There is a huge difference there, that is true.
They are very good at avoiding detection until they go in for the death strike
They don't like the idea because it takes skill to make charcoal skin look good.

I truly wish japan's influence was far lessened in the realms of elf/dwarf fantasy. There are moments where I suspect the fact we often see those races as mono-cultures is because that is how japanese pop-culture tends to treat them regardless of appearance.

He never said Tolkien's weren't the best, only that most people are too dumb to even realize there's a difference, and those who do realize the difference don't care.

>> No.30653355

I don't think you understand just how many brains and hearts they consume.

>> No.30653371

You know, if you had manage to create fucking cold fusion in a rock, you'd be pretty proud of it too, I suspect.

>> No.30653393

Spoken like a true faggot who knows nothing of pride and honor.

>> No.30653441

>slaying kin for self-aggrandizement

Feanor is not a good person, Anon.

>> No.30653474

That's the pride part, moron. I never said it was benevolent.

>> No.30653476

oh good, I see you can look things up on google

go read a book douche-nozzle

>> No.30653706

>implying anyone ever disputed that

>> No.30653727


>It's a mermaid ! A cute mermaid with big tits and a round ass !
>Sir McAnon it is a deep one you shouldn't get too close it might prove dang...

>> No.30653738

OP, elves are supposed to be advanced and cool. They're not supposed to live in the woods unless they're bumpkins or simpletons.
Using Legolas as a template for your default elf is like using West Virginia as your template for First World countries.

>> No.30653856

>Appalachian, moonshine-drinkin', tax evadin', rifle totin' elves

I could fap to that

>> No.30654081

What makes you think living in harmony with nature prevents a society from being advanced? Magic motherfucker

>> No.30654103

What makes you think using magic prevents a society from building mighty citadels and great cities? Calaquendi motherfucker

>> No.30654140 [SPOILER] 

golly gee I wonder who is behind this post

>> No.30654154

I am impressed by how realistically you managed to portray me with only that comment to go on. You also made me chuckle a little.

>> No.30654167

Japan has lots of influence on that shit because no one else does anything interest in with it. While they make tons of animation and comics some western game developer is just making stupid or otherwise uninspired variations ob the same shit.

>> No.30654171

>implying Fëanor isn't a steady source of comedic relief and laughable antics

>> No.30654202

>>It's a mermaid ! A cute mermaid with big tits and a round ass !

Prove it

>> No.30654255

So apparently Morgoth is Russian...

>> No.30654291

>Anon doesn't know about gay Russian Morgoth and Sauron

On topic, I prefer snow elves to wood elves, OP.

>> No.30654310

Wasn't it obvious?

>> No.30654698

>tfw no qt3.14 Dwemer gf

>> No.30655226

I actually have a drow wizard in my game. He hates Lolth and is rather nice compared to epother members of his race, Probably because he is NE and sees violence as a tool, not as an end.

>> No.30656548


>dwarves should use picks, hammers, tools and weapons efficient to fight in tunnels when they are above ground in the woods pissing off some elves by cutting down a bunch of tree trunks for the furnace, hurr durr

>> No.30656769

Wood axes and war axes are not the same thing. Cultures who make weapons based on tools make ones based on what they tend to use and the majority of a fantasy dwarven population lives underground. Hence warhammers and picks.

>> No.30656831

Also spears and warhammers are still very effective above ground.

>> No.30656851

And you can combine them! Lucerne hammers. Yum.

>> No.30657056

The idea of a unit of heavily armoured dwarves carving their way through goblins with warhammers never gets old.

>> No.30657080

Your opinion is feces. The Aboleth are the best race. Your opinion is compost. All hail the Aboleth.

>> No.30657124

I like the idea of 13 badass dwarfs holding their own against an entire bloody army of Goblins more.

But then again, I'm more impressed by shows of resistance, than shows of force.

>> No.30657380

Now that is a manly elf!

>> No.30657637

I like elves when they're first age awesome, erecting glorious cities and beating the shit out of evil gods and demon princes, and not a depressing dying race telling Man to stop having fun and join them for salad eating and harp playing.

>> No.30657713

> salad eating

The idea of elves, a race of people normally associated with great skill in archery and an attunement with nature being vegetarians is fucking stupid.

>> No.30657887

That's just reinforcing the idea that Drow are a terrible race that shouldn't exist.

>> No.30657921

They're good at archery because of all those carrots that they eat.

You honestly think they use archery for hunting? Why would they ever harm an animal?

>> No.30657956

Remember, being 'attuned with nature' means you are a vegan hippy who would never harm a living thing.

>> No.30658012

Because killing and eating animals is natural.

Just so you know, Tolkiens elves hunted (because Tolkien wasn't a fucking idiot and knew it would make ZERO SENSE for a culture of vegetarians to even come up with the idea of bows).

>> No.30658531

I don't know. Tolkien Elves aren't exactly a step up from what current elves have become...

Either way, I think Dark Sun handles Elves the best.

>> No.30658885

>slap demons so hard they drop their swords, then tackle those niggas, and start whaling on 'em while holding them steady by their chain-collar things

Living the dream, Glorfy.

>> No.30658929

>Build majestic cities
>craft mighty artifacts and legendary weapons
>battle monstrous demons and terrible dragons
>not several dozen steps up from current elves

Seriously, bro?

>> No.30658974

That is what High Elves do in pretty much all settings they exist in. Not all elves are hippies in the woods.

>> No.30659007

Then obviously folks are complaining for nothing, aren't they?

>> No.30659014

"immortal" "Perfect" and "Achieving Everything" aren't good character traits, and especially not good traits for the cultural aspect of an entire species.

>> No.30659050

People who dislike Tolkien elves also tend to dislike high elves.

>> No.30659085

Well the Noldor get the first. The second two, definitely not. They were cruel, hot blooded, tempestuous, and vengeful. And failed pretty hard to do much more than cry at Morgoth and interrupt his plans. They might have broken his foot, but they certainly didn't crush him. The Valar had to do that.

>> No.30659106

Why would you hold a sword like that?

>> No.30659124

>Tolkien elves
>Achieving Everything

Someone didn't read this thread's assigned reading

>> No.30659192

Most people who dislike Tolkein elves seem to think DnD copied them well.

>> No.30659211

It looks like a broken stone relic sword.
Shit like that seems to be all over the regions the Night Elves inhabit.
In fact the place is an archeological gold mine considering there's an adamantine great sword of the titan's themselves imbedded into the skull of a great old one in plain sight in Darkshore.

Chances are, that's just a Night Elf scout searching the area, given the garb, and the fact that Night Elves rarely use swords, and when they do, they don't look like that.

>> No.30659284

>Dark elves
>Anything but the best

>> No.30659289

By the intended portrayal of DnD elves? Of course not.

But a lot of games house traditional Tolkien style elves anyways for whatever reason.

Shit, I mean Eladrin handle High Elves better the Tolkien's original depiction, but I mean, his elves are basically a prototype or Patient zero for modern elves anyways.

>> No.30659321


You guys are strangely persistent little devils, aren't you? Was it really that fun?

>> No.30659379

I love TES 3-5, don't really have a favorite (maybe Skyrim?). But yeah, it's that great.

>> No.30659401

Huh. That's fair, I guess.

>> No.30659417

At the time, yes.

But it's mostly the characterization and lore of the Summer that make them total fucking bro-tier.
Not to mention that the scenery is absolutely glorious.

Keep in mind that if you want to play it start out with speed and athletics bonuses or your character is going to move at a snails pace.
If you're rolling a fighting class, invest into agility for hitting things more accurately and stamina regeneration, since running will eat all of your stamina.

And that if you're a mage have magic primaries and a magic attuned race, as spells can and will fail.

>> No.30659623

Why arent there any video games in which I can play as a god tier elf like glorfindel or feanor, fucking up demons and dragons in a glorious first age setting

>> No.30659664

You mean like Skyrim?

>> No.30659769

No, absolutely nothing like Skyrim. That game has some of the most pathetic fucking dragons every and the elves are hideous and stupid looking.

>> No.30659911

>glorious first age setting

>> No.30659968


Angband et al.

>> No.30659972

Noldor strong.

>> No.30659984

I like the way they look. They don't look "pretty" humans with pointed ears like in other settings, they look non-human humanoid creatures. They look better than everyone in Oblivion anyway.

>Dragons are weak
Change the difficulty setting.

>> No.30660011

>hideous and stupid looking

God forbid a game make elves look distinctly elven.

>> No.30660022

Whatever helps you sleep at night, little boy

>> No.30660044

Come out here and say that to my face, motherfucker, not online. See what happens.

>> No.30660068

No they're not. They're introverted assholes who steal Britonian children. The girls get to become wizards, and the boys become they're boy servants.

>> No.30660074

Yeah Oblivions potato people elves just didn't look good.

>> No.30660160


>> No.30660189

>the boys become they're boy servants.

Do they ever employ them for...intimate purposes?

>> No.30660215

>you will never have a qt Altmer waifu who gently but firmly dominates the relationship

>> No.30660306

It's telling that the best of Tolkien's elven sub-races are the ones based on the dwarves.

>> No.30660376

>he thinks Tolkien's dwarves aren't based on his Noldor

>> No.30660418

You sicken me, n'wah.

>> No.30660421

But the Teleri aren't based on dwarves at all, Anon

>> No.30660465

>Pathetic Dragons
Deadly Dragons and/or Dragon Combat Overhaul.
>Stupid elves
Ethereal Elven Overhaul by itself. Makes them pretty but still distinctly inhuman.

>> No.30660482


>> No.30660559

>Drow hate

>> No.30660573

Pah, what did they ever do besides build some boats and get kinslayed.

>> No.30660610

How is your limp?

>> No.30660618


>you will never have a qt Altmer waifu who gently but firmly dominates the relationship
>You will never have a qt Altmer waifu who dominates the relationship, but has a thing for being the bottom in the bedroom.

>> No.30660622

Conducted sea commerce, Anon! A most noble pursuit indeed.

>> No.30660635


>keep those n'wahs out of my town

>> No.30660642


You know what's nobler?

Not kinslaying.

>> No.30660661

You know, she probably would, wouldn't she? After a hard day's work stifling the faith of savages, she'd probably crave your...Dominion, I bet.

>> No.30660662

Vanyar have the best hair.

>> No.30660715


It's generally a good rule of thumb that dominant people tend to enjoy submissive sexual activities, and vice versa.

So yes, she would handle the household business while I oversee finances, and after a hard day's labor she wants nothing more than to get on her back/stomach and let me give her the ole Red Ring Assault.

>> No.30660745

It's been worse. I have Sauron rub some analgesics Glaurung pilfered from that wily dog Felagund's stash each night, and it helps ease the pain.

Certainly hurts less than being the dead king of a dead line from a dying race.

>> No.30660821

In Diaz' defense, that's some rocking hair.

Now try to imagine Diaz-Aule and Diaz-Yavanna getting frisky, teeg. I dare ya.

>> No.30660860

>Master of Evil, sought the domination of all creation
>Demented Superrapist

Not sure I buy that hypothesis, Anon.

>> No.30660898

>implying Morgoth wasn't at peak historical arousal when he was bound and held at Ungoliant's mercy

>> No.30660919

>let me give her the ole Red Ring Assault.

>> No.30660928

He does spend a lot of time in chains.

>> No.30660935

>let me give her the ole Red Ring Assault.

Sounds painful, I'm sure she expected you to enter through the golden road.

>> No.30660973

What's he doing with his hands.

>> No.30661040

Please don't start this shit. No one cares about "the role of PoC and women" in the Silmarillion (beyond what Tolkien wrote) except for tumblr. The premise that Tolkien misrecorded the history of his own invented world is just a means of a) injecting modern ideology into a mid-20th century work and/or b) kissing up to SJWs.

>> No.30661083


But anon!

If a story has nothing but women or non-whites, it's celebrated.

If a story has nothing but white guys it's a gross example of white privilege, racism and misogyny.

>> No.30661206

Nobody said shit about his admittedly odious political views until you did.

>> No.30661228

I like his art, you insufferable cunt.

>> No.30661326

No son, they're kidnap and they get Peter Panned up in Athel Loren. Then their peters get panned.

>> No.30661767

dwarf fortress.post

>> No.30662027

It was my favorite variation of elves way before I even knew what dorf fort was.

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