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[ERROR] No.30015343 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

I don't like how comedic the orks are portrayed as in a lot of the 40K material. I think they should be darker and scarier to fit the universe better. Does anybody else agree with this?

>> No.30015354

No.

The reason 40k sucks so much shit is that it takes itself seriously when the whole setting's supposed to be one big joke.

>> No.30015358

>>30015343
hell no

>> No.30015377

The Orks take themselves seriously.
You are the problem.

>> No.30015385

>>30015343
No.

>> No.30015398

>>30015343
>I think they should be darker and scarier to fit the universe better.
GW please stop

>> No.30015404

Man, Orks are the only reason I even begin to pay attention to 40k threads. Otherwise I'm just here for edition wars and m:tg threads.

>> No.30015408

>>30015343
>Orks can make anything happen if they believe it should happen
>Orks love war.
>In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war.
How much MORE grimdark do you need?

>> No.30015413

OP, your problem is Black Library and how they (and GW) portrays the Orks in general.

With exception to Deff Skwadron. That shit was gold.

>> No.30015434

>>30015408
>>Orks can make anything happen if they believe it should happen

Oh look, it's this shit... AGAIN.
>psychic WD-40
>crackpot Adeptus Mechanicus 'biology specialist
>Mechanicus totally unbiased and trustworty on reports
>no you're wrong!
>no you're a Tau!
>I like ham!

There's your fucking argument, let's move on.

>> No.30015439

>>30015354
Wrong. Fucking idiot, it has always tryed to be semi serious, just because it looked fucking retarded in the 80s doesnt mean it was supposed to be a joke. That was serious in the 80s rediculous by modern standards but that was how it looked back then dumb fucking neck beard fedora paki cunt

>> No.30015464

>>30015439
You are correct but Imo the orks are better off after the style shift they experienced in 3rd ed.
Just the right amount of humor imo.

>> No.30015465

I like them how they are, they're entertaining and funny but they are also a huge threat and will fuck up your shit.

>> No.30015472

>>30015439
Yeah, and whenever it tries to be serious it sucks serious shit. If 40k went full parody it wouldn't be such an autism paradise.

>> No.30015489

>>30015439
>it has always tryed to be semi serious
You apparently do not understand satire very well.

The setting isn't even original, nor was it ever. It was primarily a copy-paste of several of the greatest sci-fi works. It went from tongue-in-cheek satire to "seriuz bizness" right around half-way through 3rd, and into 4th edition or so. 3rd still wasn't taking itself very seriously when you got down to it.

>> No.30015493

They can be serious enough when they want.

>> No.30015494

>>30015343

Orks are only comedic from the perspective of the players and the people who read the fluff.

>> No.30015520

>>30015493
>4th ed codex shit

Snikrot is serious in a way that it's a funny concept for an Ork to be a master of stealth who ambushes like a fucking ninja and cuts people down using only knives. That's the joke.

>> No.30015527

>>30015408

Their projected psychic field isn't that powerful you silly billy.

It's enough to make red ones go faster or make crude stub guns actually work, but it can't make things out of thin air.

>> No.30015530

>>30015439
qq more bro.

>> No.30015532

>>30015343
Nope. No-one would play orks if they were just dark'n'grim.

That's what Space Marines are for.

Orks are for players who're sick of the dark grimness and want some comic relief.

>> No.30015539

>>30015520
A lot of Orks are good at stealth.

That's sort of the Kommandos deal. Being good at Stealth.

Also, anyone who uses the whole purple camo color argument is a faggot.

>> No.30015551

>>30015527
Just stop. It was bait. Argument's been done to death.

>>30015532
>Orks are for players who're sick of the dark grimness and want some comic relief.
Or rather, the masochistic type who enjoys playing the perpetual underdog fashion, doomed to always be the 'bad guy punching bag'.

>> No.30015562

>>30015532
Spess Merians are serious, but they aren't particularly grimdark.

>> No.30015577

>>30015539
The amount who are good at stealth isn't the point. The point is, it's a fucking joke becuase the misconception is "orks can't into stealth or being sneaky". An Ork ninja is a silly concept, on par with 'ninja dwarves'. And one of the many jokes about orks. Hell the fact that Snikrot wears a goddamned splinter-cell helmet should tell you right there not to take it seriously.

>> No.30015578

>>30015562
Spruce Meridians.

>> No.30015579

Any fine chap got a pdf of 4th edition Orks?

>> No.30015586

>>30015551
Orkz iz made for fightan and winnin.

>> No.30015587

>>30015562
Nope. Just grey-derp, with a dose of shiny hero added in, and a heaping spoon-full of boring.

>> No.30015602

>>30015586
And that phrase, along with the 'Orks' is never beaten in battle' catch-phrase, just further emphasize the whole 'bad guy punching bag' role in the setting.

>> No.30015705

>>30015343
Orks are only comedic and funny to other Orks and in stories written from an orkish perspective. You read about a battle from the Ork's side, you'll get a story about goin fast in ya trukk, lots of shooting, banter and slapstick between boyz, and everybody having a great time playing wishbone with the bodies and trying to shoot the bits of the boyz that got blown up by artillery out of the air.
You read about the same battle from the IG's perspective and you get a terrified, miserable conscript cowering in a trench as he watches a screaming hoard of massive, fang-toothed monsters tear his friends to pieces before being brutally killed in an artillery barrage from his own side.

>> No.30015713

>>30015434
>>I like ham!

>> No.30015717

You only think they're funny because you're looking at them from a observer's perspective, because its not real for you.

You're not in any danger.

A seven foot tall, green, hairless Gorilla with teeth the size of railroad spikes and a cleaver the size of your coffee table isn't going to smash through your door at any minute and slaughter you, your family and everyone you care about, just for the FUN of it. Nor will he be followed by over a million of his friends, many of whom are even larger.

However this is a constant possibility for the ordinary human in 40k. The fact that the Ork spews some HILARIOUS dialogue whilst he rips your guts out through your open neckhole isn't going to change your perspective of them that much.

>> No.30015761

> 40k is meant to be grimdark !
> 40k is meant to be a joke !

Alternatively, why should 40k be limited to a single genre or theme ? If I want my 40k stuff to be super serious, it's fine. If I want to do something stupid and silly it's fine too.

>> No.30015786

>>30015761
Because spergs gonna sperg. Their way is always the ONE TRUE WAY.

>> No.30015796

>>30015717
It's not real dude.

>> No.30015837

>>30015786
But I'm sure we can find a way to all be happy and understanding of each other !

>> No.30015879

>>30015837
>we can find a way to all be happy and understanding of each other !

>> No.30015911

>>30015796
....I don't like you, Anon.

>> No.30015921

>>30015796
>It's not real dude

You browse /tg/. Stop trying to be cool.

>> No.30015941

>>30015837

>> No.30015949

>>30015911
>>30015921
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvTNyKIGXiI

>> No.30015950

>>30015796
I think that was exactly his point.

>> No.30015952

Why do you want Orkz to be darkier when we have plenty of grimdark shit as is?

I mean, we have fucking DARK eldar for crying out loud. They have DARK in their name.

>> No.30015985

>>30015761
The reason why it can't be both, is because 40k really isn't all that grim-dark.

>> No.30015989

>>30015949
I want to believe.

>> No.30016048

For what its worth op i 100% agree with you.

I started 40k in 2nd edition and the so funney randum orks did not appeal to me in the slightest. It didnt help all the models sucked shit back then but i always prefered it when they were portrayed as more threatening in the 3rd edition. They lost that sort of goofy weakling look and became larger and generally meaner looking. I started to collect them then and they are my favourite army. Favourite models in particular are the Nobz, they epitomise the whole huge green angry fucker built to fight. I don't mind that they are generally stupid and provide some comic relief but only when its done right. If their next edition goes full circle and they again become the goofy retard looking orks, i'd drop them.

>> No.30016100

>>30015354

This.

Seriously, this.

>> No.30016142

>>30015354

>> No.30016194

>>30016142

It screams of "am I grimndark enough to play with the older kids yet, dad?", sorry.

I dunno, maybe before 1995 or something could've been acceptable. Stupid and you'd have known it, but acceptable.

Now it is not. Let it be comedy.

>> No.30016229

Comic relief done right in 40k is Nemesor Zahndrekh/Vargard Obyron.

>> No.30016230

>>30016048
>goofy retard looking orks
I see many of them having rather malevolent look, like goblins. They worked for their time (and statline), but the current ones are indeed more orcy.

>>30015985
But the humor of 40K isn't light hearted and jolly good. It's dark and macabre (Imperial Guard suicide bombers), which essentially needs grimdark to work.

>> No.30016231

>>30016194
The phrase grimdark was coined about 40k. In the grim darkness, etc. 40k has always been grimdark. This does not mean it's always serious. 40k has always had jokes. This does not mean it is only jokes. It's almost as if the setting is used as the backdrop for a game and can be enjoyed differently.

>> No.30016281

The Orks is like the most original thing in the setting. Why would you want to shit on that?

>> No.30016301

>>30015551
They're for the kind of players who like rolling dice in quests and who will always choose the option that lets them roll dice no matter how many better options are available to them.

>> No.30016369

>>30015705
>>30015717
This.

Why can't you idiots get it?

>> No.30016386

>>30016231

I get it, but I honestly think only joke 40k would be way better. Hell, I could even play it: as it is now, my impression is such as I stated.

>> No.30016401

>>30015343
No

>> No.30016414

>>30015761
That's what I always figured.

The Dark Eldar are hilariously, pompous, sadistic, inventive and dramatic. I never got how some people don't get that a lot of their shenanigans are played for laughs.

>> No.30016416

Oh look, this circle fuck again.. who fucks the chicken this time?
You group of sick fucks.
You Emperor's finest.

>> No.30016456

I think the Orks is whatever I want them to be for my army and inner narrative.

Fuck canon autism.

>> No.30016531

>>30016281
>The Orks is like the most original thing in the setting
Which really isn't saying much...

>> No.30016611

Orks are next for codex release, right?

>> No.30016614

>>30015413

what about Blood and Thunder?

>> No.30016636

>>30016611
IG first

>> No.30016644

>>30016611
Yep.
Have been for years.

>> No.30016651

>>30016614
A pale shadow of Deff Skwadron's glory.

>> No.30016661

>>30016636
Like they even need a new one. They're top tier and everyone has a boner for the average joe who was given a flash light to fight.

>> No.30016665

>>30016644
And when they do get around to it, it's going to be a rush-job that sucks balls...

>> No.30016667

>>30016611
Most rumors say IG first, then a new starter with orks/BA. So next three codicies are:

>IG
>Orks
>BA
>probably Space Wolves

>> No.30016696

>>30016661
>top tier
>IG
That's not how you spell Tau.

IG haven't been 'top tier' since Eldar came out. And if it means a nerf to Vendetta spam, then it's a good thing.

>> No.30016709

>>30016661
I would like to see a new IG codex just because it might mean more model releases to patch up some of their gaps.

>> No.30016737

>>30016665
Worse.
They'll have been half-assedly spending just a little bit of time once in a while on the ork codex ever since the last one came out, writing it in bits and pieces by different people for different editions
When they finally slam out the last parts and publish, it's going to be mechanically impossible

>> No.30016744

>>30016696
Well top tier until 6th came out an introduced Tau, our new blue overlords. Before I used to get raped by five las cannons and three lemun russ tanks

>> No.30016752

>>30016737
>Stormboyz
>Still no Furious Charge
>moves 12+D6 inches, remove as many boyz as bonus inches rolled

>> No.30016759

Submitted to the Ordo Xenos, you filthy xeno-lover.

>> No.30016805

>>30016752
Ah, if only I could use storm boys as something other than deep strike vulcans boys

>> No.30016816

>wants to take away the heart and soul of 40k

>> No.30016864

>>30016805
>no charge after deep strike
>remove d3 boyz when you do charge
>his power klaws only activate the turn you charge

fucking worthless

>> No.30016874

>>30016864
>no deepstrike charge
Wait what? that's his only shtick

>> No.30016891

>>30016874
Wait, I think his rules allow him to still deep strike and charge

>> No.30016896

>>30016891

He can't shoot the turn he enters play from DS but he can charge, he just loses d3 boys on the charge if he does it the same turn he entered play.

>> No.30016920

>>30016896
Hence why I stick him with 14 other orks and pray I can make it with no rerolls.

>> No.30016935

>>30016864
>Get a load of this grot

Zagstrukk DOES charge after deep striking, and as one of the very few units that can this is excellent.

Obviously you're going to lose a few boyz on the dangerous landing, d3 is nothing for Orks, and if you're arguing against fluffy rules in an Ork codex, then you can just eat shit thank you very much.

Finally, Zag is better than a nob, improved commissar style boss pole, and as his POWER KLAWS are build into his legs, it's no surprise they can't activate without momentum. Not to mention they're fucking I3 klaws, which is brilliant for 85s pts.

>> No.30016945

>>30016667
A new starter?
Why?

>> No.30016946

>>30016920

I've actually yet to try him out, but 6 attacks at initiative 4 that are counted as power klaws must be pretty brutal to any MC's or tanks that are causing you issues. And for the cost of a few shitty boys that I couldn't care less about I feel that he earns his points back quickly.

>> No.30017017

What do you guys expect from the new Ork codex?

Here are my predictions:
Warboss: More expensive, bike is also more expensive, no longer makes a nob/meganob squad troops

Big Mek: KFF goes up in price by about 25 pts, provides stealth instead of obscured, mek's tools makes you roll on a table if you roll a 1, a 1-2 is an explosion, a 3-4 is immobiized, a 5-6 is weapon destroyed

Weirdboy: unchanged

Zogwort: unchanged

Grotsnik: Roll on a table if he joins a unit, any result 1-4 is detrimental, 5 is nothing and 6 is acute senses or fear or some such bullshit

Maggie Thatcher: 2+ invo on WAAAGH! becomes 3+, loses an attack, goes up in price by a metric shitton, gains fear

Wazdakka: bike guns lose a strength point, become ap-, he goes up in points, gains hit and run or skilled rider

Nobz: more expensive, painboy is 75 pts, cybork bodies are 10, waaagh banner gone, bikes are 40 pts each

Meganobz: get some heavy weapon and some teleport stuff, cheaper, new plastic kit

Kommandoz: Largely unchanged, now can only take 1 special per 5

Lootas: Str 6, 30' range, gets hot, 20 points a pop, limited ammo

Boyz: 2 points cheaper, shoota is 1 point, now direct buy only in units of 20

Gretchin: 1-2 points per grot, grot blastas are S4, new kit with 5 grots and a runtherd $30

You get the idea

>> No.30017032

>>30016946
Zag and the rest of the Stormboyz no longer get Furious Charge, so he's only hitting on 3. Still can get killed by a sarg with a powersword and lucky rolls.

>> No.30017082

>>30016945
Probably because the DA and CSM codexes are kinda weak and having two Space Marine factions in the same box might not appeal to everyone.

>> No.30017116

>>30016945
The new starter is for the relaunch of epic 40k

>> No.30017123

>>30017082
I guess. Orkz and marines again is kinda lame but whatever. Bread n butter will be bread n butter i guess.
Better to have blood angels rather than DA. Easier converted.
Orkz will be awesome.

>> No.30017138

>>30017017
>Weirdboy: unchanged

They overhaul the entire psyhic power system for 6th edition and you honestly think they're not going to do anything with it?

>> No.30017146

>>30017017
Ok, first part is stupid. The Warboss doesn't need to change unless he's getting cooler weapons. (Or ork relics)

The KFF is good, but mektools are already too random to make even more random.

Weirdboys need more powers along with Zogwort with a BS of 0 and can't shoot.

Grotsnik already has a good enough rule set and just needs to be able to assault out of reserves.

Ghaz keeps his rules and gain fearless.

Wazdakka stays the same with the added skilled rider skill and an even stronger gun and can transfer his shoot after driving to the bikes he's with.

Nobz can stay the same but with added weapons and such.

Meganobz lose SaP and have the ability to take cybork bodies for a bunch of points. And maybe a mega armored Dok.

Kommandoz need more options and able to take shootas thanks to unable to charge from reserves.

Lootas maybe get the ability to buy another point in BS like an aiming squig.

Boyz can stay the same.

Gretchen can stay the same.

Flash Gitz need longer ranged weapons and higher BS skill or buy it like Lootas.

Orks get a universal 6+ FNP

>> No.30017158

>>30017017
I think you're nowhere near as funny as you think you are.

>> No.30017167

>>30017116
>relaunch
>epic 40k
Oh god, my sides...

>> No.30017175

WHATZ DIZ UMIE MUCKIN' BOUT?
U WONT ORKZ TO BE SPIKY AN SPOKY?
U FIN DEY HAZ TO BE EDG..I MEAN, CHOPPY?

>> No.30017180

>>30017138
It's like you don't know GW, i fully expect to be screwed out of everything

>>30017146
That's what would be nice, but you know it's not what will happen

>>30017158
I wasn't really trying to be funny, just realistic

>> No.30017185

>>30015343

I wish I could say

>inb4 a million neckbeards tell you how wrong you are and how the Orks are awesome and the only good thing about 40K

but I think it's much too late for that.

I get what you're saying. To some, their lighter portrayal might seem a little at odds with the rest of the universe. But I'd suggest you keep reading, past the codexes and casual mentions. Maybe read "Rynn's World" by Steve Parker, about the fall of a Space Marine homeworld (Crimson Fists, specifically) to a fearsome WAAAGH!

Still, it's not much, and while I do APPRECIATE the goofy tone of the Orks, the homicidal rapscallions, I do agree they could handle some more serious fluff in ADDITION to the silly stuff, just so they don't ALWAYS look like cart-wheeling, slackjawed apes.

>> No.30017193

>>30017017
>limited ammo
>komadoz without LOTS spec wep? woot
>nobs more expensive
>wazdakka becomes squiggun
>Mag'Urk would lose anything or get more expenzive

wots this git mucking 'bout?

>> No.30017196

>>30017180
I'm not saying it will be good, I'm just saying they're do something with it.

>> No.30017202

Challenges out right destroy Ork characters, which is just ridiculous. I would like to see a benefit to their stat line or something similar to the Get I'm Boss, but specifically for Orks.

>> No.30017221

>>30017158
The sad thing is, I really don't think he's joking. After witnessing the very uninspiring changes the 4th ed codex had, I really wouldn't put it past GW to do something like this.

>> No.30017243

>>30017193
>>wazdakka becomes squiggun
>implying he isn't already worthless aside from troop warbikes...

>> No.30017249

>>30017193
Look at what happened to the bugs

There is precedent to my words

THE END IS NIGH

>> No.30017260

>>30017017
..Pls, Anon..It hurts..

Let's pretend everything will be roses and sunshine.

>Warboss: Options for Rokkit Pack and some kind of clan related army buffs, causes fear, slight point increase. - A Warboss with a Bike / Rokkit pack makes one Bikers/Stormboyz into troops

>Weirdboy: Completely rewritten psychic table, can manifest power weapons, can do cool shit, buffed up by having more boyz nearby

>KFF Will almost certainly provide Shrouded..Which is boring as fuck, but at least it's helpful

>Bikers: Smoke cloud removed, but replaced with an option to purchase skilled rider, granting a 4+ jink save if moving (Will not stack with KFF because of some rule saying so)

>Kommando's gain hit and run, shrouded, and fleet. Probably remain unchanged. Snikkrot's blades are now AP3. pts goes up for all of them.

>Wazdakka may gain an improved hammer of wrath and...Fuck all else.

>Trukks/Buggies: Gain Exhaust cloud OR no longer give up first blood, because that shit is mad gay.. Buggies/trakks gain scout

>Meganobz merge into Nob unit entry, can take Waaagh! banner and painboy

>> No.30017271

>>30017202
It doesn't help how every weapon under the sun effortlessly penetrates 'eavy armor when it's in a challenge. And with T4 being common, and 2W being a liability against S8... yeah. challenges are horrible for the Orks now. And sadly, knowing GW... that's not going to change.

>> No.30017273

>>30017167
You haven't heard?

it's coming back

>> No.30017277

>>30017221
Every codex released during that period of time got the same treatment. Orks, Eldar, Chaos Marines, and Dark Angels were all stuck with dull, stripped-down codexes because that was the design philosophy Jervis was forcing on the dev team at the time. There's absolutely no good reason to assume the 6th edition Ork codex will continue to be built around that philosophy when the Eldar, CSM, and DA ones weren't.

>> No.30017284

>>30017260
>Let's pretend everything will be roses and sunshine.

So you can be dissapointed?

>> No.30017286

>>30017202
Or make nobs toughness 5 because they're big burly angry fucks. And have Warbosses as toughness 6 for being even bigger and angrier.

>> No.30017297

>>30017273
Not as a 'starter set' it's won;t.

>> No.30017303

>>30017271
>and 2W being a liability against S8... yeah.

Who actually takes Powefists on their squad leaders any more? They're great at insti-killing Nobs if you're willing to sacrifice your Sergeant, but worthless, overpriced challenge-fodder against any other army.

>> No.30017312

>>30017260
>Trukks/Buggies: Gain Exhaust cloud OR no longer give up first blood, because that shit is mad gay.. Buggies/trakks gain scout


I'll let you have it if it means DE vehicles no longer count for first blood.

>> No.30017322

>>30017286

Agree with this too.

>> No.30017323

>>30017277
>There's absolutely no good reason to assume the 6th edition Ork codex will continue to be built around that philosophy when the Eldar, CSM, and DA ones weren't.

You are horrifically mistaken. There are no current devs that actually play and love the Orks, working for the design studio right now. And even sadder, is Nids and Chaos Marines are good examples of what's going to happen to a a punching-bag villain army.

>> No.30017324

>>30016935
>arguing that Zagstruck is actually worth it

one of two things will happen.

1. you obliterate a shitty unit and then get shot to pieces, there goes your 250+ point unit
2. you get bogged down with a killy unit and only have power klaws for 1 round. Congrats your 250 point unit is either getting wiped out, or tying something up all game. yay.

Losing d3 boyz is horrible when you roll a 5 or 6 and there goes 36 points, whoops now time for overwatch and there goes 36 more points.

>> No.30017337

>>30017260
Nope

DOOM COMES

RUN FOR THE HILLS

HIDE YER CHOPPA, HIDE YER DAKKA, HIDE YER GRETCHIN CUZ DEY'Z NERFIN' EVERYONE

>> No.30017356

>>30017324

>Not timing your charges and deep strikes perfectly so that your shitty boys tank the over watch and Zagstruck is free to Hammer of Wrath til there is no tomorrow.

Do you even pray to Mork?

>> No.30017361

>>30017303
Well, Orks do. Because they have nothing else to take.

It doesn't even need to be a fist, though. Even a generic GK sergeant will outright destroy a Nob.

>> No.30017363

>>30017017

>meganobz getting plastics

>laughingeldarbanshees.holo

>> No.30017365

>>30017312
Totally. NO transport or weak armored vehicle should give up first blood. It's so punishing and retarded. The entire concept of first blood is so heavily stacked in certain armies favor

It's even more bullshit when the transports themselves can't score linebreaker

>> No.30017369

>>30017297
Word is on the streets it be, mah boi

There will be a starter set, it will bring blood angels and orks

>> No.30017382

>>30017369
Word on the streets was also may 2013ish orks

>> No.30017383

>>30017356
>Taking shitty 'jump choppa boys' for 2x the cost with no improvement to armor, or weaponry.

>> No.30017386

>>30017365

I've just stopped taking Trukks out right because of first blood winning the game for my opponent so many times. 35 points for a vehicle that is guaranteed to explode the second someone looks at it...no thanks.

>> No.30017397

>>30017365
Especially Armored IG, fuck how the hell do they expect you to get First Blood on that? Fuck Leman Russ squadrons.

>> No.30017398

>>30017386

That's a feature not a bug

>> No.30017401

>>30017363
Rumor says it's a dual kit

With both meganobz and the funky tellyporta nob guys

>> No.30017402

>>30017369
Mark my words, a new box set of Epic 40k when GW is hurting for profits right now, is less likely than the third Hobbit movie being 'good'.

>> No.30017421

>>30017402
I just pass it along, brother

>> No.30017424

>>30017402

They'd be more likely to dump Bloodbowl or Necromunda on the market than redo Epic

>> No.30017425

>>30017398
Where 40k is concerned, and the design studio... yeah... it pretty much is a feature. Even had a regional manager tell me it was a 'great thing' for Orks to have easy to kill open-topped transports for the cost of a rhino.

>> No.30017434

>>30015439
>it has always tryed to be semi serious

>> No.30017437

>>30017421
No. I will not spread half-assed lies all to try to influence GW to rerelease Epic:A (unaltered).

>> No.30017439

>>30015439
I didn't know blatantly ripping off judge dredd was a sign of seriousness.

>> No.30017440

>>30017397
Yeah, it's either the tanks or all the Orders from Creed sitting back on top of a building giving him +4 cover and two dicks in camo cloaks soaking up the damage and a banner. Hey, it may have cost a lot of points, but you give a shit ton of killing orders THEN do your shooting and I'm 36 inches away from you and have crap vehicles or tuns of footslogging t-shirts.

>> No.30017441

>>30017386
>tfw I play dark eldar and my whole army is first blood bait.

>> No.30017442

>>30017398

I do have a fond memory of my brother exploding my trukk only to have it careen into his termagants that had just shot it to death, taking out 14 in the process. Clumping, not even once.

>> No.30017445

>>30017361
Well, yea, Orks are the exception. But even then, the only thing that is going to reliably kill a Nob in a challenge is something with that can inflict Instant Death, or something that throws out multiple st5-6 attacks at AP4 or better. Your average squad leader is only really going to stand a good chance of killing the Nob first if he's carrying a Power Maul, which most people don't take because they don't want to give up the AP3 of the Sword.

Nobs are extremely easy to kill in a Challenge, but only if the opponent has specifically kitted his characters to kill Orks. Otherwise, they'll maybe do a wound before being Klawed off the table. I'm not sure that's a problem; a general, all-purpose list isn't likely to be overflowing with Nob-killing Sergeants, and ideally if one player has specced his list to kill Orks, the Ork player will also have specced his list to kill his opponent's army.

>> No.30017450

>>30017441
And Ork armies aren't?

>> No.30017457

>>30017437
Who even gives two fucks about Epic?

It would be like the Dreadfleet of 40k. NO fucks given.

>Inb4 anyone tries to pretend Dreadfleet didn't suck major balls

Fucking GeeDubs. Give us Gorkamorka or Necronumdia you cheap niggers

>> No.30017461

>>30017450

Well you could play green tide

>> No.30017466

>>30017450

Depends on army list.

>> No.30017470

>>30017461
Which you're still going to give up First Blood with. It's just going to take a turn longer.

>> No.30017471

>>30017450
Foot blobs, bike squadrons, and battlewagons are all hard to kill 1st turn.

The only thing in my entire codex that isn't killed by looking at it is a talos pain engine, too bad they cant synergize with the rest of the book. Thanks for taking away my webway portals, GW design team.

>> No.30017476

>>30015343

NO! MO' DAKKA!! dakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakkadakka

>> No.30017500

>>30015439
You're either delusional or started looking into 40K in the past 10 years.

>> No.30017509

>>30017466
Cover negation everywhere, easily killed vehicles, and bulk weapon ranges of 24" do not a First Blood make.

>> No.30017524

>>30017445
That's what orks have boiled down to. Making specific lists to try and take on the dudes you play with. Grey Knights and Tau can just take a few of the cheese units and everything is alright. Everyone else needs to have a plan for what everything else needs to do. Fighting someone with tanks? Better bring Tankbustas! Fighting someone who likes closecombat? Take a bunch of boyz! I just hate having to tailor make my list like a special little scarf then have it stomped on because I couldn't get the knitting right and the Space Marine player thought it would be cool to have Nothing but Splitfire Devastators in a Skyshield.

>> No.30017530

>>30017471
Yeah, and at least you have the range to fire back on the first turn. All I have is a handful of loota-shots, likely without a target.

>> No.30017536

They should just remove first blood entirely.

>> No.30017553

>>30017536
Or make dedicated transports unable to give first blood all together.

>> No.30017558

>>30017445
>the Ork player will also have specced his list to kill his opponent's army.

I do hope you realize that Ork armies can't really 'spec' or be tailored to fight other armies. Other than just trading out say a Footslogger army for a Bike army, in an effort to trick your opponent.

>> No.30017576

>>30017530
Honestly I play both DE and orks. I know the pain, but it is probably worse for DE. I mean AV 10 open topped 2 HP, t3 everywhere. It's hard not to die if you didn't go first especially since most players are allergic to using terrain.

>> No.30017579

>>30017524

Being able to spam overpowered units has been ruining 40k for fucking ages.

Until they force people to take a fuck ton of troop choices the game is always going to suck shit

>> No.30017590

>>30017536
Agreed completely.

Stupidest fucking victory point they put into the game. Someone on the design studio was playing too much LoL.

>> No.30017602

>>30017576
>but it is probably worse for DE. I mean AV 10 open topped 2 HP, t3 everywhere
It's about the same, considering neither army is at all survivable.

>> No.30017604

>>30017558
>aspect boyz

>> No.30017612

Maybe they should make it so light transports like raiders and trukks don't count towards the reserve limit?

>> No.30017617

>>30017576
That's because terrain makes you too slow to ram your choppa in someone's face. Get thirty boyz up in one piece and it takes three turns to move out of it because you keep rolling ones for movement and charges.

>> No.30017628

>>30015717
So comedy movies like Monty Python and the Holy Grail (where a fluffy white bunny kill a few grown men) aren't supposed to be funny just because the viewers are in safe position and there won't be a fluffy white bunny waiting to maul me under my bed?

>> No.30017629 [SPOILER] 

Oh, I almost forgot

ANIMOSITY

>> No.30017633

>>30017590
Especially since one player gets to use ALL THEIR SHIT before the other player gets to play.

>> No.30017635

>>30017604
Which you're fielding anyways. Tankbustas? You'd better have a mob, even in a Bike list. Lootas? Oh god why are you not taking them, ever?

Orks do not spec to fight specific opponents, because all of their limited options or unit setups apply against everything they'll face.

>> No.30017658

Maybe Flash Gitz won't be completely shit in the new edition

>> No.30017671

>>30017635
like space marines?

>> No.30017692

>>30017658
Telling you man, better guns and high BS is what I'm hoping for so the custom made models don't get turned into nobs with cool guns.

>> No.30017714

>>30017671
Orks have 2 weapon upgrades. Big Shootas, and Rokkits. Guess which ones against space marines?

Fuck even taking Burna Boyz applies against Space Marines, because you're loading them into an open-topped Wagon and dumping 15 templates out the side, anyways. Even 3++ nurminators die to that.

>> No.30017721

>>30017017
They'll appropriate the SoB faith system, for a Waaagh! mechanic.

Generate d3+1 Waagh! points, +1 for each unit engaged in assault or that shot last turn, +1 for Warboss, etc.

Warboss can call for a Waaagh! once a game, gain additional d6 Waagh! that turn.

Boyz may spend a point, unit re-rolls any failed toHit roll of 1 in the shooting/assault phase. Roll a d6, On a roll of a 6, may re-roll any failed toHit roll. On a roll of a 1, instead of re-rolling a die, it instead inflicts an automatic hit on the unit of Boyz.

Big Mek, may spend a point to attempt to bring any destroyed vehicle back with d3 Hull points, 6+. May sacrifice 2d6 nearby gretchin to add +1 to their roll

Nobz, spend a point to increase their Feel No Pain roll by +1, until the start of next turn. Roll a d6, roll of a 6, increase is +2, roll of a 1, each model suffers a wound- saves allowed.

and so forth.

>> No.30017748

>>30017692
They just need 20pts a model, with Twin-Linked built-in, and Bosspoles.

Instead they'll make them 30pts a model, make them Str 6 base, and give them a plasma cannon option for +100 points while still refusing to give them a Bosspole.

>> No.30017755

>>30017721

Waaagh needs a complete rework. It's absolute shit at the moment.

>> No.30017756

>>30017721
Should just give them makrer squigs while we're at it.

>> No.30017758

What are the chances of cheap trukks, decent stormboyz, cheap kans, cheap deff dreads, lots of dakka?

>> No.30017761

>>30017755
Waagh's been shit since they removed it's ability to double your initiative.

>> No.30017768

>>30017628
>Implying there isn't

>> No.30017770

>>30017748
Guess all dreams come to an end. Flash Gitz will never have enough dakka.

>> No.30017800

>>30017761
What? All it did was give you fleet.

>> No.30017806

>>30017758
>What are the chances of cheap trukks
Cheaper than now? Not likely.
>decent stormboyz
Don't hold your breath. They've always been the lictors of the Ork codices.
>cheap kans
Already cheap. Not likely to change, and not likely to get more Hull Points, either.
>cheap deff dreads
Maybe. Will be better if they make Kustom Mega Blastas an Ork Plasma Cannon once again... but wouldn't be cheap.

>lots of dakka?
Likely. Whether or not it's good however...

>> No.30017836

>>30017800
Fleet and Furious Charge.

It used to give you 2x initiative when you charged, provided you rolled equal to or below your unit's model count on 2d6. That means Nobs swung at I 6, and Warbosses went at I 8.

>> No.30017847

>>30017836
We're talking about the current edition, right? I've only played with that one.

>> No.30017858

>>30017847

>Used to

What do you think son.

>> No.30017881

>>30017858

>> No.30017903

>>30017881

God I wanna eat Elizabeth's tasty farts.

>> No.30017930

>>30017903
I bet you're the guy who kept staring at her ass whenever she bent over to look at something.

God it looked so squeezable.

>> No.30017932

>>30017628
You know what he means, stop being a shit.

>> No.30017963

>>30017903
Dat's gross yo

>> No.30017968

Anyone got any new rumors to share about the codex at all?

>> No.30017977

>>30017903
>dats not how yer waaagh

>> No.30017982

>>30017968
No rumors yet. Other than it supposedly is due after IG.

>> No.30017995

>>30015434
>Ork wears camo that's out of place in the battle environment. They should stand out to their enemies
>yfw the camo works because they think it works

Orks are magic. Give up already.

>> No.30017998

>>30017977
Or is it?

>> No.30018025

>>30017968
Orks will be rolled into a single Xenos book, with several other races, titled: Enemies of the Space Marines.

>> No.30018026

>>30017995

>You've probably walked past a giant 7ft Ork wearing bright purple clothes and not even realised it.

>> No.30018032

>>30017968
Here's what's come out so far


New Racial Ability - get FnP 6+ as a race because they are basically tough and it takes a lot to kill and stop an ork.
Conditional AP - Most weapons will stay the same except choppas are ap6 but gain ap5 on charge and big choppers will be +2S and ap4 and ap3 on charge.
New Nob Upgrades - Nobz stay the same but are getting more characterful upgrades available to them, new kinds or grot assistants such as suicide grots (act a lot like bomb squigs but prone to blowing up in unit) and ammo runts and attack squigs also more weapon options like Big shootas and such.
New Meganob Upgrades - new nob mega armour unit with teleporting abilities but its teleporting works differently from conventional deepstrike bit more random.

>> No.30018041

>>30018025
Just like the Black Templar. Poor bastards.

>>30018026
Isn't there a guard regiment that use royal purple and pretty glass like armor? I remember reading it in Guant's Ghosts a long long time ago.

>> No.30018044

>>30018032
(Cont)
New Mek/BigMek(?) Ability - There is a special mek character that can bestow teleportation on D3 units.
New Bloodaxe Special Character - Special bloodaxe character with rules that can bring back boyz units once they are destroyed, much like an imperial guard special character.
New Monsterous Creature - A large multi wound squiggoth type creature, not ForgeWorld, it is always hungry and uses a hunger points system. If it doesn't fulfill the hunger points with enemies it will rampage nearest unit friend or foe in order to eat.
Psychic Power Tables - Two new ork psychic lists for weirdboys, Mork more offensive and Gork more strategic. Many powers in the lists get more powerful the more orks are around the weirdboy, although the more powerful they are the more dangerous they are if they are miscast as they will often misdirect or hit the weirdboy and unit.
Fortifications - New Ork Only Fortifications (including an ork rock)
Warlord Chart - Ork only warlord chart.
Matt Ward - Rumours of Matt Ward writing them have begun to circulate as well. Though you aren't an upcoming 6th edition codex until he is rumored as your author.
Mek Tank – Sporting a giant Shokk Attack Gun, firing Bomb Squigs. Tank can purchase a KFF.
Flashgits - Their Snazz guns roll for random range each turn (12+3d6). On a triple 1 they overheat like Gets Hot. The unit may purchase upgrades like +1 BS, +1A, blast, rapid fire, skyfire, ans others, several are mutually exclusive.
Boys - cheaper! (Why would they get cheaper with the addition of FnP?)
Meks - Look for ability to field an increased number of Deffdreads and Kanns than currently.

>> No.30018056

>>30018044
(cont)
Stormboyz - Gain a "Rocket boost" attack that can target flyers. They must move 18” and if they pass a flyer they each get 2 attacks on it as if assaulting a vehicle. Move as infantry during their next turn. Looks like the designers played a lot of THQ's Space Marine!
Buggys / Trakks - May tank shock if they are upgraded with spiked plates/wheels.
"Grot Boss" - Grot HQ with a stateline of a Ork Boy, but higher BS. Equipped with a nice kustom-mega-shoota as an option. Can also get a Buggy or take a Killa-kan as a transport/upgrade
"Da Crew" - An HQ unit of even bigger Nobs. They have odd LoS modifications, One Nob must be nominated as "Da Boss", and if Da Boss is killed, one of Da Crew is promoted. This interacts in some new way with "Kill the Warlord" victory conditions, and is effectively an entire "warlord unit".
Grot Whirlybird - Rotored transport: Capacity 20 Grots. They get dumped on the battlefield roughly from the Whirlybird taking a mandatory DT test, and cause mayhem if they fall atop another unit.
Whirlybird – looks like a Huey hit with ork hammer, bomb doors underneath to drop gretchin.

75% is likely bullshit, the other 25% unlikely

>> No.30018060

>>30018044

>Boys - cheaper! (Why would they get cheaper with the addition of FnP?)

Because FNP on a 6+ is still as shit as their current save.

>> No.30018070

>>30018025
And it will sell, too.

>> No.30018087

>>30018060
Plus insta kill negates FnP and anyone with str 8 and up can fuck that up.

>> No.30018102

>>30017995

>> No.30018114

>>30018056
I still think Da Crew is like the coolest shit ever even though you can do the same with a Warboss and Nobs.

>> No.30018138

>>30018102
>It they work because they think it does

Nice to see that finally gave up. I always win in the end!

>> No.30018165

>>30018138
you*

>> No.30018171

>>30018138

>> No.30018203

>>30015343

Wots yuz talkin' bout ya dum git? I shud smash ya' muckin' ead in.

NO

>> No.30018205

>>30018171

>> No.30018232

>>30018205

>> No.30018255

>>30018041
Vitrian dragoons, though theirs was more to do with reflecting the surrounding light in day or else absorbing it all for night. More practical than pretty, at least until you try relying on the armour to save you from anything shooty/smashy

>> No.30018273

>>30015439
>Serious.

The leader of the Orks, prophet of the Waagh Ghaazgkull Magaret Thatcher. (Sorry, "Mag Uruk Thraka")
Certainly not a joke
.
The Dark Angels are lead by Lion'El Johnson. "Dark Angel" is a poem by homosexual poet Lionel Johnson.
Clearly not a joke.

There's a blurb in one of the Imperial Guard Codices about a platoon being the FIRST to be posthumously sentenced to death. (So they sentenced a bunch of dead guys to death, and have done it enough that someone has the distinction of being the first.)
This is clearly serious business.

>> No.30018277

>>30017017
This made me scared and angry at first, until you got to "Boyz: 2 points cheaper, shoota is 1 point, now direct buy only in units of 20"

Admittedly, due to slot limitations it peters out at anything over 1000, but even so.

THE GREEN TIDE COMETH, MOTHERFUCKERS.

>> No.30018296

>>30018138
It's not about winning or losing, it's about not being stupid enough to play.

>> No.30018297

>>30018255
And the shit they fought against were traitors. If they have that much trouble with dudes just like them, then just wait till the daemons and marines show up.

>> No.30018314

>>30018296
Says the vanquished!

>> No.30018336

>>30018273
Don't forget Genestealers were Xenomorphs from Aliens.

>> No.30018337

>>30018297
Actually if you think about it, when you're fighting people armed with flashlights wearing a bloody mirror seems fairly smart.

>> No.30018341

Anyways, the Orks just started Ragnarork. Isn't that serious enough?

>> No.30018346

>>30018273
>The leader of the Orks, prophet of the Waagh Ghaazgkull Magaret Thatcher. (Sorry, "Mag Uruk Thraka")

Debunked by Andy Chambers himself. The name for Ghaz carried over from his LARPing days when he and a bunch of fellow orc players made up their own orc language. When he became a game dev for GW, his Warboss, who was named under the naming convention of the orc language he made up, became the 'big bad Ork' in 40k.

>> No.30018348

>>30018341

>Largest Waaagh! In 10,000 years.
>Stopped by a normal man with a power klaw for a fist.

>> No.30018350

>>30015551
>Orks are for the Masochistic type
I play Orks because I like modeling scrap heaps. My boyfriend is a huge masochist, and he plays Tau, what's that say?

>> No.30018360

>>30018314
Just accept that it's Orks all the way down.

>> No.30018364

>>30018314
>hurr maybe this'll get him to bite

>> No.30018367

>>30018337
I think we just solved a huge problem.

>Traitor Guardsmen! Quickly, flip your armor around!
>Can't pew pew this motha fucka!

Then they switch to Autoguns (that have no AP)

>> No.30018375

>>30018348
Saying Yarrick is a normal bloke is like saying Simo 'white death' Hayhah was a normal farmer. Some people are walking legends, the men who walk amongst the world of Achilles.

>> No.30018379

>>30018350
His day has come.

And Ork players are fucked.

>> No.30018385

>>30018375

Still just a man. Like Batman.

>> No.30018392

>>30018348
Don't forget the War of Dakka. Said to be the second biggest WAAAGH and yet Farsight kills off the boss and uses his ashes as some cool snowglobe.

>> No.30018402

>>30018367
Dragoons were loyalists m8
But yeah, the point still stands. Maybe GW should make their AP system a bit better. Not one armour fits all bullets/missiles/god lightning stuff. A kevlar vest can stop a bullet but not a knife e.t.c.

>> No.30018404

>>30018379
>And Ork Players are fucked
Actually, just me in particular.

>> No.30018416

>>30018375
White Death was also going against a conscripted Red Army with little to no military training or leadership, and using strategies like purposely shooting someone in the leg, shooting everyone who came to help the victim, and when people stopped coming, he'd shoot the fallen soldier in non-lethal areas to provoke more idiots to come help him.

Simo Hayah was good. He was also an evil fuck.

>> No.30018419

>>30018385
Not really. Ork logic has made Yarrik one of the scariest mother fuckers in the universe. Course if he switched to fighting Chaos he would probably get stomped on hard.

>> No.30018431

>>30018348
The Waaaagh hasn't stopped. It's on going and gaining momentum.

As for Yarrick, he is Tyranid food.

>550999.M41 The Crusader Thwarted

>High Marshal Helbrecht of the Black Templars, in pursuit of the Ork Warlord Ghazghkull Thraka, leads a fleet forged from fifteen Space Marine Chapters against a splinter tendril of Hive Fleet Leviathan which is barring his path. Despite employing every strategy and ploy at his disposal, Helbrecht’s fleet is continually forced to fall back before the Tyranid advance. His mounting ire matches the rising numbers of the Space Marines lost to the Leviathan.

>> No.30018432

>>30018404
You're just better adapted to it.

>> No.30018433

>>30016696
>Not going Melta Vet or Chimera board parking lot, or Arty Spam or Biomancy Blob or DA Allies for a 50 Man 4++ mob
Get gud.

>> No.30018441

>>30018402
I meant is as an alarm to the guardsmen opposite of them wearing eight pointed stars of rape on their faces.
>>30018404
By the tau guy who is your bf?

>> No.30018443

>>30018416
>evil
Can't call anyone evil in the centuries where development was measured in blood and iron.
>Inb4 Godwin

>> No.30018452

Nothing quite as fun as messing with the Tau. They are off trying to subjugate a world for the Greater Good, along comes WAAAGH! <ork name here> and the army gets sidetracked hunting them down. While they're gone, Orks strip mine their target planet and leave before Tau return.

>> No.30018456

>>30018432
>I'm the better adapted
>mfw when I'm bigger in the sack
>mfw when 90% of the time I'm on top.
>>30018441
That is the joke.

>> No.30018472

>>30015837
>wheredoyouthinkweare.gif

>> No.30018473

>>30018392
What? That's a lie. The War of Dakka wasn't said to be big or anything.

Compared to the Orkish Armada of 12 Waaaaghs! that Tau Empire faced, Ironteef's Waaaagh! shouldn't register at all.

>> No.30018476

>>30018404
Oh you.

>> No.30018484

>>30018443
Fine. Not evil. Cold hearted dick with no morality.

>> No.30018489

>>30018456
Thank you EDI, and I like your taste in pictures. Show me more.

>> No.30018491

>>30017386
>Not knowing how to deploy
>Not taking Big Meks with a KFF
>Not taking enough Lootas to secure a First Blood if you go first/deploy smart

>> No.30018494

>>30018360
Flawless logic.

>> No.30018500

>>30018484
>not doing your d00ty for homeland

>> No.30018511

>>30018456
Great. You play Orks and like the dick. What do you want? An award for doing what other people do, just with a vagina -or- a for being gay?

>> No.30018516

>>30018489
No idea who this EDI guy is, but sure.

>> No.30018518

>>30018473
Dakka was big because the Tau were too stupid to realize they got a facefull of CREEEEEEEED! by a stinkin Ork.

>> No.30018519

>>30018491

5+ invuln is nothing. Big mek gets shit on by anything.

And where did I say I didn't take Lootas? Stop being a faggot.

>> No.30018536

>>30018473
That's probably me getting my WAAAGHs mixed up. You would think with all the cool ass stories of Warbosses kicking shit over under their iron boots you think the codex would get more Special Characters.

>> No.30018549

>>30018519

Meant cover, which is even shitter.

>> No.30018564

>>30018519
>Stop being a faggot.
This is a 40k thread, and an Ork thread no less... Faggots are a diamond dozen, here.

>> No.30018573

>>30018516
Then go play Mass Effect 2 and 3. God, the orks need more bad ass art.

>> No.30018575

>>30018511
Nah, but I like to make people laugh. That's reward enough for me.
>>30018519
He gives a Vehicle Obscured anon. Deploy behind cover.

>> No.30018578

>>30018456
I bet you and your boyfriend are really cute together

>> No.30018598

>>30018518
Shut up and get back in ball, Grog.

>>30018536
Tuska the Daemon Killa Dataslate!

For Codex : Chaos Daemons

>> No.30018603

>>30018511
I play dick and like the orks.

>> No.30018604

>>30018564
I wont disagree there. I remember an ork player who was a bit...strange from my stand point. And I felt a bit embarrassed to be playing orks beside him.

>> No.30018618

>>30015354
It's shit because fucks like you take it seriously. Of course the setting itself takes itself seriously, the worst thing it could do is just wink at the camera every five seconds with a laugh track and be in on the joke. It's like the comedian laughing with you at the jokes and just explaining all the time how and why something is funny, instead of just straight-facedly delivering the joke.

>> No.30018631

>>30018573
I'll say, Orks are fucking awesome. Would be nice if we got some with a dataslate.
>>30018578
Thanks anon.

>> No.30018639

What's not scary about a species of massive shitfaced interstellar retards being the most successful race in the entire galaxy.
>In spite of not understanding science or technology in the empirical sense.
>In spite of being hardwired just to kick the shit out of stuff, including themselves.
>In spite of not having any aspirations, job skills, or overall goals that don't boil down to bludgeoning.
>In spite of every other race in the galaxy being considerably more evil, organized, twisted, and powerful.
>Despite not being able to form a plan that isn't just "win".
>Considering their major transport is essentially hitchiking on giant piles of space crap infested with genestealers.
>Even when they don't really understand which way to point the gun, which part of a grenade to throw, or half the controls in any of their vehicles.

Doesn't get much scarier or darker than that.

>> No.30018648

>>30015343
All the races are blatant "X fantasy race BUH IN SPEZZ!!!", 99% of the lore doesn't even make any sense if you think about it. What bothers me is that all the other races are all SRS BUSINESS in a setting that has absolutely no basis for that sort of thing and isn't well thought-out in any way and is more like how a child would make up an "awesome" setting as they went along. Like if Adventure Time tried to take itself seriously. That would just be straight out retarded. It's Dr. Who syndrome, basically. It can't decide if it wants to be serious or comedy, so it fails horribly at both, especially seeing as the setting is buttfuck retarded in every way.

>> No.30018652

>>30018604
What was his problem?
>>30018564
What army do you play then?

>> No.30018653

>>30018598
Or like the Overfiend or the Arch-Arsonist. Hell even some people don't know like Klawjaw.

>> No.30018657

>>30018575
Obscurred is pretty half-assed now. And Ork armies tend to eat up so much deployment that they spill out of cover. It also doesn't help that even the most "terrain cluttered 40k board" is sadly lacking in terrain.

>> No.30018670

>>30015343
it's a joke to us. it's serious in-universe.

that doesn't conflict.

>> No.30018675

>>30018631
>Would be nice if we got some with a dataslate.
You'll get a stupidly easy to represent clan with the only data-slate for Orks they'll make. Probably something like Goffs, with the only change-up being "here's some really shitty artifact weapons that aren't worth taking, and a new random warlord table..."

>> No.30018681

>>30018653
I've actually always wanted the Arch Arsonist. Has a S6 AP3 Torrent Flamer, can make Burna Boyz troops? Maybe a "Burny Dance!" rule, that forces multi wound models to run around 2d6 scatter that're lit on fire?

>> No.30018683

>>30015354
Fuck that.

>> No.30018690

>>30018631
Anything at all, feels like we're getting the short end of the stick here.

>> No.30018693

What are you guys hoping to see on the Warlord trait table then?

And what do you think we'll get instead.

>> No.30018695

>>30018657
>Tend to
I run all of my shit on Bikes, Trukks, or Battlewagons save for Lootas, a squad of backfeild sitting Grots and Big Gunz. I've never run into this problem.

>> No.30018696

>>30018653
The Overfield and his pet Avatar would be nice.

>The humans had betrayed them. He had deluded himself with the belief that it was possible to forge real links with some individuals of that species. He had hoped, to his eternal shame, that the humans would come to the planet and defeat the orks. He had been wrong. Even if he had the power to take this thing from the planet, what would he do except complete the humans’ victory?

>If he waited, the orks would return. They had no choice. They could not resist the siren call even if they were not conscious of it. And the humans had been weakened by this first conflict.

>Before him, he saw the contours of vengeance given physical shape.

>Rising from the chamber floor was a throne. Seated on it was an immense statue. Its form was distorted, vague, incomplete. It was a body without features. The Lileathan world had been abandoned too long, and what had been left behind had lost its essential connection to the eldar. Endlessly consumed by its fury, the shard of Kaela Mensha Khaine now poured energy into another race, one with an inexhaustible hunger for war.

>From this single point, far beneath the surface of Lepidus Prime, wrath called to the orks.

-Shadow Captain

The Orks got a new ally in their war against the nids.

>> No.30018702

>>30018652
>What army do you play then?
Which game? I *had* 6 Ork armies, 2 of which I still own and are collecting dust, 1 of which was donated to a local GW when the 4th ed codex was released.

>> No.30018716

>>30015434
>not eating the heart of a newborn child to become invisible and invulnerable to bullets
It's like you're not a proper Liberian warrior or something.

>> No.30018723

>>30018652
Uh, I shouldn't really say. But he had quite a big load on his chest and was once seen wearing a dress.

>> No.30018736

>>30018695
>fielding trukks
WTF is wrong with you!? Bikes, sure. Battlewagons, you bet. Lootas/Big-Gunz/Grots... No problem.

But why the fuck are wasting time/points on trukks? If you've got less than 6, then they're not worth it.

>> No.30018775

>>30018693
I would probably like to see something that add hatred to the army maybe once a game or just the area of the boss.

Maybe something for the dakka people like an added BS once per game.

I think orks need something that just straight fucks things over liek Orbital Bombardment so how about three large blast templates of falling roks.

Ork sneakiness?

>> No.30018809

>>30018696
Have him ride around on top of it and if the wounds runs out he just hops off. Or have them hand in hand while they murder shit.

>> No.30018835

>>30018693
1- Get 'em! - Can run after Shooting
2- Swamp 'em - If you have 5 more models than an enemy unit in Assault, each model gains one attack. This stacks with Charge.
3- Dakka dakka! - For one turn, The Warlord, and 1 unit within 6 inches of him, has Twin Linked shooting weapons.
4- WAAAAAGH! - Can call 2 WAAAAGH's this game.
5- Planetfall - 1 unit Boyz or Nobs can start the game in reserve. Treat the unit as being in a Rokk, (Counts as a Drop Pod). Place a Large Blast template over an area, and drop it. All models under the template take a S8 AP3 hit. Remove a total of boyz equal to the scatter ammount
6- Straifin' Run! - Once per game, nominate a starting point, and roll 3d6. A 2 inch wide, 3d6 long bar of Supa Shoota fire peppers this area. Each model under the bar takes a S5 wound.
>>30018736
>Not having ability to snatch any objective you want
>Not having ability to Tank Shock people off of objectives with your trukks
I also take Wagons full of 19 boys and a PK nob.

>> No.30018846

>>30018456
Krump the fish'ead, boss. Krump him real good like. Loot his shooty gubbinz.

>> No.30018867

>>30018775
I think WAAAGH's should cause Fear to all enemy units within 6 inches of an Ork unit. I also think every unit should have a different effect during a WAAAAGH. Like, Lootas are TL'd and Gets Hot! Nobs can Shoot, run, and Assualt, Storm Boyz can fly 3d6, Flash Gits are Twin Linked, and reroll all 1's to wound and hit. Shit like that.

>> No.30018881

>>30018723
>mfw when this can still apply to me.
Go on.

>> No.30018893

>>30015705
>>30015717
These men speak the truth.

>> No.30018895

>>30018846

>> No.30018928

>>30018835
>>Not having ability to snatch any objective you want
You can do that just fine with Bikes.
>>Not having ability to Tank Shock people off of objectives with your trukks
You can do that just fine with your Battlewagons, of which you can have up to 5 on.

>> No.30018953

>>30018881
Unless you're a big guy who walks with a cane and needs a support bra for your DD man knockers, I don't think that's you. I never witnessed him in a dress, but one of the guys I played with said he saw him. Plus the dude only showed up once to game with us and never returned.

>> No.30018968

>>30018928
>Can do that with Bikes
But using them with a Boss as a CC beatstick, then a Enemy Backfeild as Linebreaker, and a Point Capture is better.
>Can have up to five of
But my Trukk is smaller, and I can park it sideways, pour out 11 boys onto a point, and hide behind it without losing 90+ points when it wrecks.
>>30018953
It's not me then, thank god.

>> No.30018976

>>30018928
And run them over with d6 str 10 hits even if they run away!

>> No.30018994

>>30018976
>D6 S10
>No AP still
Still not shit if they have 2+/3+

>> No.30019017

>>30018968
I played against another ork guy with my Chaos army. I will admit that his three trukks and two Battle Wagons. (with KFF and filled to the brim with burnas) Had me sweating a bit with my mediocre Chaos dudes with no Helldrake support and he had three dakkajets.

>> No.30019037

Quick question about tank shocking, does it take up your entire movement phase, or can I move then declare a tank shock of 6" / or tank shock 6" then move another 6" afterwards. Or do I only get the Tank shock movement for that phase?

>> No.30019069

>>30019037
Tank Shock is done in place of standard movement.
>>30019017
Did you make Pinning checks when the Dakkajets shot you at their BS3 because of Strafing Run? And did he have his entire army in your face on the first turn?

>> No.30019074

>>30018968

>But using them with a Boss as a CC beatstick, then a Enemy Backfeild as Linebreaker, and a Point Capture is better.
Having Troop Warbikes (or Nob Bikes) beats the hell out of any other way you can field them. If Fail-Dakka isn't your fancy, then grab the (much better) FW bikerboss.

>But my Trukk is smaller, and I can park it sideways, pour out 11 boys onto a point, and hide behind it without losing 90+ points when it wrecks.
The trukk also is overpriced for how hideously frail it is. If you don't want your boyz packing around in a Battlewagon, at least grow a pair (of whatever) and run Big Trakks. They not only make Trukks even more unnecessary than they were already, they also give you even more DeathRollas.

>> No.30019092

>>30019069
Actually....yes he did have most of his army up in my grill. I managed to take out one of his wagons and make him engage my marines in battle. The dudes who were getting shot at here on the other side of the board trying to sneak behind his trukks and take an objective. Let's say that didn't go very well.

>> No.30019117

>>30018696
How does that work?
If you isolate an avatar long enough it stops being eldar?

>> No.30019126

>>30019074
Be advised that the FW Bikerboss Rules are now free on FW's site.
http://www.forgeworld.co.uk/fwDownloads
Ork Dread Mob Army List Update

That, Mekboy Junkaz, and Grot Tanks are several interesting additions that may be used in the standard Ork Codex. This PDF is a must-download.

>> No.30019141

>>30019126

I hope 6th doesn't force grots down our throats, because I can't stand them fluff wise, and I don't want to be forced to use them over boys in an army list.

>> No.30019143

>>30019117
I dunno myself, but before people argued about it a lot. Basically the Avatar was abandoned with no one around and Khaine actually hates Eldar with burning dick passion. So with no eldar souls in sight and only orks being close to him who like to fight, just like him, he calls out to them so they can claim him as their burning effigy of Gork and Mork.

>> No.30019195

>>30019141
4th did that. Best objective sitters in the game, bar none.

>> No.30019199

>>30016414
Like the "Tau Cultural Exchange".

>> No.30019240

>>30019199
You think red lights would flicker on when the Dark Eldar asked for only female tau with big tits and asses.

>> No.30019318

>>30019195
I just use them to man my big guns, which are just a bunch of toys I had from a long time ago.

>> No.30019353

>>30019195
You mean 5th. In 4th, Grots were pretty goddamned awful.

>> No.30019360

>>30015577
I don't know. If a purple covered ork just appeared seemingly out of thin air I'd take that ork pretty seriously.

most definitely void my bowels too
.

>> No.30019412

>>30017337
And when everybody's nerfed...
Noone will be

>> No.30019441

>>30019360
You would take any ork seriously. They're twice your size and have the strength to rip your arms out of your sockets.

>> No.30019442

>>30018431
I wouldn't put it past Ghazghkull to "protect" Yarrick from tyranids or team up the only way orks know how. with extra dakka.

They are best friends after all...at least from Ghazghkull perspective.

>> No.30019445

>>30015343
But Anon, Orks are scary from an in universe perspective. They only seem silly and funny to us, as third party, omniscient observers.

Consider this: You're a local PDF soldier. Suddenly you're mustered out, and made to dig defenses. The brass has even put the guard regiment that was being trained for the planetary tithe to work! They won't say what's happening, but your buddy who knows a guy who knows a guy who works at the deep void etherics array says an anomaly has appeared at the edge of the system. By the time night falls, you're snug in your trench. You're still on alert, and through the clear night sky you can see that the system monitor ships have pulled into orbit.

Without warning, the night sky erupts in a blaze of hellfire and macrocannon shells as dozens of streaking asteroids begin to fly at the the navy vessels above! they're too small to make out perfectly, but they're flashing as though they're discharging weapons! You tell Hawkins to give you his artillery auspex, and you use the electronic eye to peer up into the void. They are asteroids, but they're covered in guns and engines. And in the void beyond, you can see, slowly approaching, vast ships, hulking and rusted, bristling with guns and armor, dwarfing the navel vessels defending your world. And behind them; a twisted mass of metal and stone, cobbled together from a dozen starships and a hundred asteroids. The sky erupts with fire, and in an instant the navy vessels are reduced to scrap metal. Then the asteroids begin to fall.

>> No.30019458

>>30019445
All around, the asteroids begin to impact, leveling buildings, flattening fields of wheat, and even crashing into the trenches. For a moment there is silence, then the stones burst open. From within emerge monsters. Two meters tall, green, tusked, bulging with muscle and laden with guns and crude blades, these demons from the void boil out of their crude transports and surge without hesitation into the defensive lines. The sky erupts as an uncountable number of drop-ships and fighter bombers scream into the atmosphere, bearing machines of war and shrieking death from all directions. Great smoke belching machines roll forwards, jerking and shuddering and spitting death and fire. You can see from your artillery dugout as the forward defensive lines are literally washed over, like castles of sand on a beach. The well trained guardsmen had stood their ground with discipline, firing volleys of lasgun fire into the advancing green horde, but the xenos care not. Las bolts that would evaporate a man's torso sputter ineffectually upon their hide. They fall upon the guardsmen, hacking and screaming; and laughing. It's unmistakable; you can't make out their guttural alien language, but they're laughing as they slaughter the terrified men in their trench.

>> No.30019471

>>30019458
You're given the order to fire into the first trench-line, and you so without hesitation. Your griffon mortar roars as your crew loads shell after shell till the barrel glows red. You don't need to aim; the battlefield is so thick with green flesh and war machines that you can hardly miss; but no mater how many shells are fired it seems to make no difference. The mortar next to your vanishes in an instant; becoming a heap of flaming scrap as a thunderbolt hurled from the cannon of a war machine the size of an ore crawler lights upon it's hull. The machine rolls forwards into your trench and the Sargent orders you to seize your lasguns. The hatches on the tank open, the green tide pours out. These ones are larger; three meters tall, wielding blades bigger than yourself. Sarge valiantly charges at one bearing a large metal claw, swinging at the beast with his chainsword. The blade strikes green flesh and digs in about an inch before kicking back; the teeth unable to chew through it's hide. The monster laughs, and it's booming, guttural voice croaks out in croaks out in distorted Low Gothic, “Puny 'umie, can't hit no 'arder?” The beast punches forwards with his metal claw, and the blades snap together in one unnaturally quick motion. Sarges simply falls apart, his blood drenching the xenos and it continues to laugh. You loose your nerve; you can't die here, not like this. You dive under the griffon and let your comrades face the aliens alone.

>> No.30019477

>>30019445
>>30019458
Pretty sure we've had enough people go "They're scary to us, but not the person on the battlefield!"

>> No.30019479

>>30019441

>They're twice your size while squatting

Needed to be added.

>> No.30019487

>>30019471
The green beasts begin making their way through the artillery trench, slowly and deliberately. No longer surging forwards, they're enjoying themselves, making a game out of the slaughter. You see Hawkins emerge from the griffon's cab, holding a krack grenade. He whoops out a warcry, and jumping to the ground, hurls the device at the monster who killed sarge. The grenade impacts on green flesh, and blows the creatures arm off at the elbow. In two huge steps the monster is standing before Hawkins. It wraps is remaining hand around Hawkins waist and lifts him up to eye level. And it laughs. “Eh he he. Noice! Now dat's how ya WAUGHHHHHH!” The monster continues to laugh as he swings Hawkins body against the vehicles hull, dashing out his brains effortlessly. All around the green tide surges by, and you can sees them as they head towards the city.

>> No.30019502

>>30019487
You've been hiding in the ruins for days now. There are still some civilians and PDF troopers fighting back, but you know better. The city is lost. From the radio reports, the world is lost to. You'd managed to salvage the vox from your unit, out of some vain hope that you might be able to call for help. But there is no help left on this planet. All around you the greenskins loot and pillage. They round up those that don't fight to be slaves; they've taken over and adapted the planets manufactorums with frightening speed. The slaves are often killed or maimed; it almost seems on accident, these creatures, you think now they call themselves orks, they don't seem to understand the fragility of human beings, or even the concept of pain. Fear and stress are alien to them. You shudder as you remember what happened when the orks found the Schola. They were genuinely confused as to what the children were. When it became clear though that they'd be little good for work, however, most of them were eaten. A few lucky ones where thrown into pits with vicious little green monsters about the size of a child. The orks wanted to find out if the “pink grots” were any better than the green ones. You'd hear the screams in your sleep no doubt, if you still could sleep.

>> No.30019511

>>30019479
I would much rather be taken as a slave then have to get killed by a giant green man.

>> No.30019524

>>30019502
Hope! You can hear it over your vox; the planetary distress signal is going off! The Civil Defense Bulletin is playing over your vox, informing you that the Astropathic choir is sending out a distress call. If you can get to that building, maybe there's still one safe spot in this city. As you crawl through the sewers; you've come to know them very well these past few days; you almost can't believe that the choir could still be alive through all this. But they must be, there must still be one safe place on this world. Emerging in the basement of the Citidel Astropathica, all is dead quiet. There are no defenders, no sign of life at all as you make your way through the building. Could it all be for nothing? The building looks gutted, but you see no xenos either. Your hand trembling, you lay your hand upon the rune of opening controlling the door to the choir chamber. You depress it, and the portal opens. For a moment, you are filled with joy, as you see the choir is there, quite alive and chanting out their call of distress. Your heart sinks into your stomach though, when you see the figure in the center of the room. Four meters of green flesh, wearing smoke belching armor the whirs and clanks, as the beast within laughs and shouts and the frightened astropaths. The monster turns and faces you, “Ello there!” it jovially declares, “If you thought that last scrap wus fun, wait'll you see wut's comin'!”

>> No.30019545

>>30015343
Honestly OP, I think the orks are plenty grimdark as they are, possibly more so than most other races. Whilst humans fight by necessity and for conquest, able to show mercy at some extreme circumstances, we have the ork, a hulking mass of nigh unkillable green muscle and sinew with razor sharp teeth, who can create weapons of war so deadly that they defy the laws of physics; from scrap metal. Orks cannot show mercy, as it doesn't register as emotion, they only find joy in ending others lives and razing entire civilizations to the ground, using the rubble to fuel the never ending war effort. The entire ork culture is made for war, whilst humanity can find joy in other avenues, an ork lives to kill. And the most terrifying part? They have zero conscience about it. It is their hobby, not their day job, they thrive on it. You want them to be more grimdark? How, by making them less oblivious to the absoulute desolation they make? Their child-like nature is what makes them so terrifying, because they cannot be reasoned with under any circumstances. Hell, from memory, the reason the imperium has a 'fuck them all up' policy to xenos was due to the ork incursions in the early years of it. Don't even get me started on their gods of pure unadulterated rape. Orks are practically a race of khorne berserkers without the edgy blood shit, who answer to no-one. I think they are fine.

>> No.30019561

Alright sudden inspiration.

"I'll make a man out of you." from Mulan totally needs to be converted to "I'll make an Ork out of you."

If it really hasn't been done before, what is wrong with everyone?

>> No.30019608

>>30019561
You sir are a genius. Someone come up with lyrics!

>> No.30019708

>>30019608
Let's get down to business
To defeat the Humies.
Did they send me snotlings
When I asked for boyz?

You're the saddest gitz I ever met
But you can bet before we're through
Ya runtz, I'll make a Ork
Out of you.


all I got so far
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/mulan/illmakeamanoutofyou.htm

>> No.30019743

>>30019708
Tranquil as a burna
But on fire within.
Once you find your dakka
You are sure to win.

You're a spineless, teef-less pathetic lot
And you haven't got a clue.
Somehow I'll make a Ork
Out of you.

>> No.30019749

>>30019708
We'll finish the rest in the future. Maybe sing it when the new ork codex comes out.

>> No.30019841

>>30019743
oh don't know if I'm well versed enough in ork kulture to do this next part.

>Chien-po: I'm never gonna catch my breath
>Yao: Say goodbye to those who knew me
>Ling: Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym
>Mushu: This guy's got them scared to death
>Mulan: Hope he doesn't see right through me
>Chien-po: Now I really wish that I knew how to swim

[boyz] BE A ORK
We must be swift as a kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE A ORK
With all the force of a burtal Gork
[boyz] BE A ORK
With all the strength of a raging horde
>Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

ah can't think of a good line for the last part

>> No.30019880

>>30019841
>brutal Gork
ah fucked that up

last one for now. not much to change or I'm pooped out on my creative juices.

Time is racing toward us
'til the Humies arrive.
Heed my every order
And you might survive.

>> No.30019903

>>30019841
I ain't gonna catch dat squig
I fink dat grot can't see me
Boy was I a git for gettin stabbed
That boss is way to big!
Hope he doesn't krump me!
Now I really wish I knew how to fly!

Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!

>> No.30019904

>>30019880
oops forgot one before the chorus

You're unsuited for the rockin' of waaagh
So pack up, go home you're through
How could I make a Ork
Out of you?

x2
[boyz] BE A ORK
We must be swift as a kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE A ORK
With all the force of a burtal Gork
[boyz] BE A ORK
With all the strength of a raging horde
>Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

WAAAAAAAGGGGGHHH!!!

>> No.30019938

>>30018516
>BY THE OMNISSIAH! WHAT HAPPENED!?

>> No.30020006

>>30019938
>Who's dat git cryin' ovah dere?
>Dunno, but he'z been doin' it for four hours.

>> No.30020037

>>30019903
now just need some notAsian ork names to replace them.

>> No.30020081

>>30020037
That won't be too hard. Most names are a bunch of made up words and sounds or two kickass words together. Like Gormak or Grimklaw

>> No.30020119

>>30019545

>Don't even get me started on their gods of pure unadulterated rape.

Please do, I don't know many stories about Gork and/or Mork so I'd like to hear what you have.

>> No.30020208

>>30020119
I too would like to see this story.

>> No.30020246

Let's get down to biznezz'
To defeat the Humies.
Did they send me snotlings
When I asked for boyz?

You're the saddest gitz I ever met
But yah can bet before we're through
Ya runtz, I'll make an Ork
Out of yah.
Tranquil as da burna
But on fire within.
Once you find your dakka
Yah are sure to win.

You're a spineless, teef-less pathetic lot
And you haven't got ah clue.
Somehow I'll make an Ork
Out of yah.
I ain't gonna catch dat squig
I fink dat grot can't see me
Boy was I a git for gettin stabbed
That boss is way to big!
Hope he doesn't krump me!
Now I really wish I knew how to fly!
[boyz] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!
Time is racing toward us
'til the Humies arrive.
Heed my every order
And yah might survive.
You're unsuited for the rockin' of waaagh
So pack up, go home yer through
How could I make da Ork
Out of yah?
[boyz] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!
[Da ‘ole horde] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!
WAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!!!
>Needs a proof read

>> No.30020348

>>30020246
Someone save this for all eternity. We've created a master piece.

>> No.30020351

>>30019608
Here's one I wrote up a while back.

Let's git ta da foightin', ta defeatz dem gitz
Did dey send me Squig guts, when Oi asked, fer boyz

You'z da biggest gitz, Oi evah met
But you'z can betz a'fore we're troogh
Surely Oi'll make a Nob outta youz!

Cunning as da God Gork
Or was it God Mork?
Juss' load on more Dakka
Loike a proppa Ork!

You'z a tiny, small, pathetic Grot
You'z fergot da choppy too
Somezhow Oi'll make a' Ork outta you!

Ork boy 1:
I'm nevah gonna catch dat squig!

Ork boy 2:
Say good-byez ta moi Big Shoota!

Ork Boy 3:
Choppa on shoota or shoota on choppa?

Ork boy 4:
Dat Nob gotz dem scared ta death!

Ork boy 5:
Hope he doesn't want'a crump me

Ork Boy 6:
Now Oi really wish Oi hadz an Iron Gob!

BE A NOB!
We'z must be fast loike a red ve-hi-cle
BE A NOB!
Usin' force loike a yel-low Rokkit
BE A NOB!
Wit' all da strength of da gods Gork an' Mork!
Mys'terius as da powah of da WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Humies racin' toward us, we'z bettah showz dem
Lissen ta me ya gitz, an' shoot yer gubbinz

You'z not sooted fer, bein' a Nob
So'z pack up, line up, you're krumped
How'z couldz Oi, make a Nob, outta youz?

BE A NOB!
We'z must be fast loike a red ve-hi-cle
BE A NOB!
Usin' force loike a yel-low Rokkit
BE A NOB!
Wit' all da strength of da gods Gork an' Mork!
Mys'terius as da powah of da WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

BE A NOB!
We'z must be fast loike a red ve-hi-cle
BE A NOB!
Usin' force loike a yel-low Rokkit
BE A NOB!
Wit' all da strength of da gods Gork an' Mork!
Mys'terius as da powah of da WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

>> No.30020485

>>30020348
I made a pastbin just to post it
http://pastebin.com/eCXVmZnE

it could use some better formating for an image capture if someone wants to pass it around that way.

>>30019903
and thanks for those parts. I knew I couldn't do it alone.

>>30020351
I like this one too

>> No.30020488

>>30020351
Hm, I think I read this before.

>> No.30020506

>>30020485
See, orks can get along together and make great WAAAGH!s

>> No.30020545

>>30020488
That'd be unsurprising, since I've posted it before. I could do my orky version of "Greased Lightning" as well.

>> No.30020614

>>30020545
You're a crazy git. Next you're gonna roll out the orkafide Ducktales.

>> No.30020700

I’ll make an Ork out of yah.
By Fa/tg/uys

Let's get down to biznezz'
To defeat the Humies.
Did they send me snotlings
When I asked for boyz?

Yer the saddest gitz I ever met
But yah can bet before we're through
Ya runtz, I'll make an Ork
Out of yah.

Tranquil as da burna
But on fire within.
Once yah find yer dakka
Yah are sure to win.

Yer a spineless, teef-less pathetic lot
And yah haven't got ah clue.
Somehow I'll make an Ork
Out of yah.

I ain't gonna catch dat squig
I fink dat grot can't see me
Boy was I a git for gettin stabbed
That boss is way to big!
Hope he doesn't krump me!
Now I really wish I knew how to fly!

[boyz] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!

Time is racing toward us
'til the Humies arrive.
Heed my every order
And yah might survive.

You're unsuited for the rockin' of waaagh
So pack up, go home yer through
How could I make da Ork
Out of yah?

[boyz] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!

[Da ‘ole horde] BE DA ORK
We must be swift as da kunnin' Mork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the force of da brutal Gork
[boyz] BE DA ORK
With all the strength of da raging ‘orde
Mysterious as da dark side of da space hulk!
WAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!!!

>> No.30020763

>>30020700
man I hope I got all the errors out.

the pressure to do it right for the boss is krumping me

>> No.30020774

>>30020614
Don't tempt me. Too late.

Oh, and here's Squigged Loightning.

Well, dis trukk iz orky-matik, it'z dakka-matik, it'z waagh-o-matik
Woi, it'z Squigged Lightnin'!

We'll getz sum more dakka and more flashy bitz, oh yea
(Keep gabbin' WAAAAAAAAGH, keep gabbin')
Da useless roof cut off, so'z more boyz kin shoot, oh yea
(Oi'll git da teefs, Oi'll see ya'z getz da teefs)

Wit four big-shootas innit, An' as many boyz'll fit
Da beakeez will run, an' da boyz be hav'in sum fun
In Squigged Lightning

Go, Squigged Lightnin' you'ze burnin' gits wit ya skorchas
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
Go Squigged Lightnin' you'ze bashin' troo puny humies
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
You'ze supreem, da grots all scream, fer Squigged Lightnin'

We'ze put some red paint onnit an' a big scary face, oh yea
A Grot skin covered dashboard an' squig hide seeting, oh yea
Wit new bitz, bobz, an partz, an' add sum mekboy smartz
You'ze all will be a braggin, if you get in dis wagon
Squigged Lightnin'

Go, Squigged Lightnin' you'ze sheddin' gits offa yer sides
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
Go Squigged Lightnin' you'ze fastah' dan a grot on fire
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
You'ze supreem, da grots all scream, fer Squigged Lightnin'

(Da musik boyz be playin' here fer a long time, tink o' bashin' an' smashin' in such a orky ride)

Go, Squigged Lightnin' you'ze blastin' gits wit ya shootas
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
Go Squigged Lightnin' you'ze bashin' wit a wrecker ball
(Squigged Lightnin' go Squigged Lightnin')
You'ze supreem, da grots all scream, fer Squigged Lightnin'

>> No.30020803

>>30020774
while I'm at it...

>> No.30020860

>> No.30020866

Can't handle all the orkiness!

>> No.30020981

orks have always been the comic relief since RT. RT started off as a satire of the grim dark, then after 2e, it started getting way too cereal about itself.

>> No.30021092

>>30020981
>RT started off as a satire of the grim dark, then after 2e, it started getting [...] cereal about itself.
Yup.

>too
Nope.

>> No.30021231

>>30020614
'ere ya go, ya git.

Ork Tales!

Ork loife iz loike a 'urricane
'Ere in, da Waaaaaaagh!

wagons, shootas, dakka jets
We'z got, it aull!

Moight krump a 'umie
And den a Beakee!

Ork Tales! WAAA-AAAAGH!

Ever'day we'ze out dere makin' Ork Tales! WAAAA-AAAGH!
Tales of krumping dem gits and panzee tales!

D-d-d-danger lurks behindz ya
Deres Boss Snikrot out ta foindz ya

Whatta do? Just grab panzees by dere tails! WAAAA-AAAGH!

Ever'day we'ze out dere makin' Ork Tales! WAAAA-AAAGH!
Tales of krumping dem gits and panzee tales! WAAAA-AAAGH!

Not Puny Tales or 'Umie Tales, no ORK TALES! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

>> No.30021289

>>30021231
It's glorious

>> No.30021517

>>30015343

>iposteditagain.jpg

How is knocking the teeth out of corpses to use as currency not grimderp enough for you

>> No.30021565

>>30021517

It's about as grimdark as using leather for chairs.

>> No.30021622

>>30021565

If the leather was made from sentient beings, maybe.

>> No.30021711

>>30016644
You mean
Astrum Militarum (c)

>> No.30021750

>>30021622
>I don't know what "sentient" means.
Well, at least you're honest about it.

>>
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