/tg/ - Traditional Games

Purge the unclean.

>>29904337
Taking Slaan for one with tounge (because that is just fun as fuck)

Nurglette for 2 since Unclean Ones are really nice to be around, especially with out pain

Tzeech for the cool power

Slaan if full daemon and I'll take the tentical

>Saying no to Tzeench

It bothers me that the slaaneshi demon is least attractive.

I have to pick the Tzeentch gril, though the Bloodletter is a very close second.

>>29904337
No thanks OP, I already got my waifu Isha

>>29904337

Anyone who doesn't pick Tzeentch is an idiot.

Why?

Each dollar can be converted into 100 pennies. Each penny weighs about 2.5g. So now you have 250g of matter as opposed to a single gram. With enough money and time, you can violate entropy to the point where you're able to create anything from an endless supply of ammo to an actual black hole.

Yeah that's right. You're basically able to reshape the universe to your will via gravitational constants.

>>29904337
Tzeentch even though the bonus sucks compared to the others. Tzeentch has the rule of cool on his side, so I'll take my feathery waifu

>>29904523
>dem jugs
>dem qt glasses
>getting a super long tongue
You seeing ok bro?

Does she come with a penis?
This is important.

Nurglette
No longer getting depressed and having a waifu

>>29904546
Well fuck. I knew my faith would be rewarded someday

>>29904581
Slaaneshi girls come to order, of course
Dicks in this case would be the second (full chaos) form

>>29904546
You
I like you.

>>29904609
What about the khorne girl? She is the cutest.
The slaaneshi one looks like an alien ginger.

>No qt conservative GF who doesn't get worried about everything

>>29904575
I think I've got a personal problem, is all, Anon. Taking away proper noses is a huge turn-off for me...

It's pretty fucked up.

>>29904647
Get help, son
Ask your local Word Bearer

>>29904546
Brilliant.

I wonder what the conversion rate from copper to gold is?

Say 1 dollar equals 250g of copper, which you can then convert to 250g of gold, which then converts back to a significantly bigger pile of dollars.

>>29904715
>>29904598
>>29904612
>>29904546
Turns out the girl saw this coming and turn the pennies into an equivilant into a single diamond just to fuck with you

>>29904337
As long as qt Slaneeshi waifu doesn't have a dick that's my choice.

and those glasses better come with her.

Nurglette will smell like an unholy abomination, Khornette will either be extremely abusive or into super BDSM shit, and Tzentch will be a crazy bitch who you will never get a straight answer from.

With Slaneeshi chick, you're still getting a crazy bitch, but you both know where you stand (crazy excess chick) so I can live with that. Especially if I can get this >>29904392

>>29904337
>Not Choosing the Daemonette
Best girl and power
Tongue me up

>>29904769
>Nurglette will smell like an unholy abomination
1-She is an unholy abomination
2-So she can't complain about my neckbeard musk

>no one for Khorne
That power alone is pretty dam good

>>29904359
So you want to bang the Nurgal girl?

>>29904337
A) Slaanesh- lewd waifu and a glorious tongue; who wouldn't?
B) Nurgle is the only choice I'd consider making; I don't want to get murdered, rapemurdered or planmurdered.

Tzeentch gets an honourable mention because exploitable boon, however I'd probably get justasplanned pretty fast, especially if she's actually a fucking chaos spawn.

>>29904879
Some of us actual know how to take a shower m8

>>29904337

nurgle just so i can start shit and not feel pain

>>29905003
>Not chosing not to shower
>Not priding in your musk
You don't get the plaugefather

A) Khornette because -4STR
B) Tzeentchette because shenanigans

>implying i want heretical filth

Can't we have a Be'lakorette and have all the boons?

>>29904392
>>29904593
>>29904575
>>29904609
>>29904656
>>29904769
>>29904774
My nigs

>>29905213
I'm actually going to go with Khorne here. I'm slightly into Dominant BDSM, so yeah. I think I'm set. (Also, Super Endurance. Build those natural muscles baby)

>Nurgle
Would be nice to just let go and accept life for what it is.

Plus, I'm 100% Grandpapa Nugle anyway. Basically a foregone conclusion that the Nurglet is mine.

>>29905363
For those saying nurgle: Why can't you do that already?

>>29904337
WHERE IS MY IVORY MALAL DAEMONETTE CHAOS

>>29905394
Because I've been depressed in my lifetime and it sometimes comes back
I've also become stressed and rather critical of other people, so it'd be nice to just accept people and things for what they are

>>29905394
For whatever reason it is difficult for me to accept life as it is. I chafe under its constraints and am depressed by the state of things in the world today.

Not to mention my underlying psychological disorders that I am not getting treatment for. But that is a whole other conversation.

And really, Nurgle is the closest God to achieving true Zen. And I like that. Near-Zen and passive victory.

>>29905398
Because no one cares about your redunant non-god

>>29905394
I do, but the fact I can't feel pain is great
and everybody gets a little sad

>>29905575
You're just afraid that my demonwife will kill your demonwife.

>>29904656
>you will never suck out rotten milk from her bloated motherly breasts
Oh who am I kidding, it would be creamchease considering how rotten it would be

>>29905611
Fear is for the loyalist scum.

>>29905646
Blue creamchease.
>c.: retitab noun

>>29905650
And yet traitors don't know no fear.

Pic related

>>29905646

Khorne waifu. With the mega endurance, we can lift and squat together for fucking hours, and get ripped to fuck.

>>29905646
+1 Curruption

Tzeench, that power isn't useful but it's convenient and cool

>>29905838
>we can lift and squat together for fucking hours
read as
>we can lift a squat together for fucking hours

Nurgle forever, may the blessed Plaguefather watch over our union until the end of time.

>>29904337
>Khorne: Mega endurance, you can run, fight for hours on end
>you can fuck for hours on end
Fixed that for you

Now it's time for me and my waifu to get drunk as hell and arm wrestle

>>29906523
Why would you want to fuck a Bloodletteret for hours on end?

>How'd you end up

>Khorne: Mega endurance, you can run, fight for hours on end
I become a professional MMA fighter with the blessing of Khorne, and get rich as fuck.

Then I go home and fuck my delicious khornette waifu all night long.

>>29906582
But muh mega endurance

If I drink lots of milk, it'll be okay, right?

>>29906611
Who told you works?

>>29906649
*Who told you that works?

>>29906673
If I'm not bound by human limits I can train to be tougher than a spess muhreen. If I drink loads of milk I'll have the strongest bones.

Thinking about it, wouldn't a daemon of violence and strengths breast milk turn your bones into steel or some shit?

Khorne / endurance
Slannesh / I want to molest her with my tentacle.

>>29906795
It might. But at the same time, its "milk" from a Bloodletteret. There's no telling what affect it'll have on you.

She might not even lactate.

>>29906582
We all die eventually, anon. Can you imagine a better end than succumbing to fatigue and injuries after hours of continuously fucking a beautiful daemon?

>>29906827
>She might not even lactate
Then how is babby fed?

>>29906795
She's a Khornate daemon; her "breast milk" is probably blood.

>>29906846
BLOOD OF KHORNE'S ENEMIES

>>29906856
Works for me

>>29906846
>implying daemons have offsrping

>>29906925
How is daemon formed?

How warp get preggant?

NO
I MUST RESIST THIS TAINT
THE EMPEROR PROTECTS

>>29906958
From the souls of the god's dead followers.

>>29904337
>Nurgle
>Super busty
>Never depressed
Easy choice for me

>>29906987
And don't forget, Brother Nurglite, the annual Grandpapa Nurgle family picnic in his garden.

See you there!

>>29907016
>annual Grandpapa Nurgle family picnic in his garden.
I am concerned as to what this entails

>>29906980
>papa nurgle
>papa
Checkmate atheists

>>29907060
Normal family picnic stuff.

Sack race, bobbing for plague-apples, pin the feathers on the Lord of Change, food, drink, fun.

>>29906958
They need to way instain gods who kill their daemons because these daemon can't frigth back? It was sent through the warp this mroing, a god in the Ream of Brass and Blod who had kill his own dameons. My pary are with the prince, who had lots his minions. I am truly sorry for your lots.

>>29907094
I meant more the contents of the food and drink.
Although that doesn't sound too bad
Assuming my crippling social anxiety will be gone

>>29904337
>Khorne: Mega endurance, you can run, fight for hours on end
> not picking this
> not fucking your at demon bride for days on end

Is this even a choice?

Tzeentch babe all the way.

>>29907147
>the contents of the food and drink
Mostly the leftovers from last year. Sure it's been sitting out for a while, but I'm sure it's still good.

>>29907147
Depends on what Grandpapa is feeling for this year. Last year it was a Luau of sorts. Just gotta watch for the Nurglings trying to make off with your food.

As for your social anxiety, everyone is welcome. Just come and you'll have a good time.

Can I get a Tzeentchette more like this?

Dem soft black wings, dat translucent skirt, dem eyes, etc.

>>29907201
Ya papa Nurgle and the boys are nice as all hell

Khorne, Khornette is my waifu.

>>29904337
I want to shove my tent oval into my slaaneshi wife

>>29907277
Tenticale fucking auto correct
Tounge is fine too

QUESTION FOR TZEENCHITES
Can I turn air (no value) to fire (no value)? Can I turn heluim atoms (no value) to alpha rays (no value)? Can I turn dick to cunt?

>>29907319
No, no and no
Stop being a fag

>>29905787
Is that some sort of mutant bobby/hank hill hybrid?

>>29907343
You're just upset because of your small mundane object.

>>29907319
No, but you can probably heat things
No
Not unless you also pick slaanesh

With the Tzeentch power, is there anything stopping me from turning simple things into complex things of equal size and volume? Like, could I turn ingredients directly into delicious food?

Because I have a pork shoulder sitting in the freezer and I really want some barbecue, but I don't feel like waiting a whole day to smoke it.

>>29907556
probably not, but I'd assume the smoked pork shoulder would be cold, probably tasty, but cold.

>>29904337
>Tzeench- Can break the laws of physics
>Slaanesh- Can't even become the girl

>>29907556
Delicious food has more market value than ingridients. ...Reversal can work though: turn cooked meat into more uncooked, cook, repeat. World hunger solved!

>>29907607
why on earth would slaanesh let you pick just one gender? if he wanted to he'd probably wind up making you both, but with only one tit.

>>29904337
What if you tried to force the Nurglette to take a shower?

what if it was shower sex?

>>29907607
That's what "experts choice" option B) is for, isn't it?

>>29907644
That's not pleasurable. Or anything close to perfect. A proper slaneeshi transformation would give you two sets of fully functional genitalia.

>>29907653
Enjoy your golden shower

>>29907679
why'd you just rewrite what I said?

>>29907644
Ugh, the split down the middle thing is fucking lame.

I miss old daemonettes.

>>29907653
I don't see why the Nurlette wouldn't shower.

But the water would be hazardous waste afterwards.

>>29907702
That's slaanesh

>>29907704
I DON'T KNOW ANON! I DON'T KNOW!

>>29904337
Khornette
>So many hate sex marathons
Slaane
>For the tongue, and then go on the road with a K.I.S.S. tribute band, and become sex god to match her when I come home

I don't know shit else except what I learned from here. Which is not much really but I want to make y'all proud.

Whichever one of them is most favorable towards /pol/ stuff.

Can the Slaaneshi daemonette have both a dick and a vagina?

>>29907877
Stay edgy.

>>29907894
Yes, but only one at a time.

>>29907915

Where do I sign?

>>29907948
The daemonette's tits

Khornette is qt as fug, but my day to day actions are more in line with nurgle. I don't know what to choose.

>>29907679
>only 2 sets of genitals
>not 5 dicks that all ejaculate cocaine

>>29908105
>five dicks that ejaculate cocaine
why not just modular genetalia?

>>29907964
I'll sign with my new Tenti-dick

>>29908151
can they still jizz crack?

>>29904337
>Take Tzneech.
>Walk into a parking lot.
>Find that one asshole who is double parked.
>Convert my car key (which cost me a ridiculous amount, seriously, never lose a modern car key, it cost me half as much as my smartphone) into their car key.
>Drive their car to a completely different part of the parking lot.
>Park it correctly.
>Walk away.

"FOHR KAY-OSS!"

Seriously, i would do so much random harmless bullshit in the name of Tzneech, purely in accordance with his plan...

Of course, the downside to having a Tzneech-ian bride? Sex is so complicated that you may need a scorecard to tell what fetishes she needs you to fulfill now.

>>29904492
If you refuse Tzneech, you'll spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been...

it's all according to his plan.

>>29908420
Scorecard? You'll need a quantum chart in four dimensions in the bedroom telling you which holes need to be filled with what.

>>29906856

Finally all those mornings where my weak gums started profusely bleeding at the touch of my toothbrush every morning have finally come to use!

A: Nurgle-bride. Chubby, possibly poor hygiene but I can remedy that by getting her to let me give her regular sponge-baths, and I'm never depressed. This is by far the best gift.

B:Khorne bride. With that kind of endurance I could get ripped enough to keep up with her and mitigate some of the downsides of a psychotic, murderous, violent girlfriend who lives for the chance to kill people.

>>29904337
interesting..

Khorne: i would become a great runner and could probably make some money in track probably con: would wake up one day with her cutting my head off.

Nurgle: Wouldn't be bad. but not much of a change. con: would end up getting some kind of std from her but wouldn't care.

slanesh: 3' moist soft tentacle means i could make it big in porn. Con: she's going to scar the shit out of me during sex with her claws.

Tzench: usless power for the most part might be decent to become a famous magician. con: sooner or later she's going to screw you over and/or sacrafice you to summon demons.

>>29908420
Car key for car key
That is a non-overkill way of using the power
well done

>>29904337
Tzeench girl obviusly. Our valetine would be try to out troll the other

>>29905646
That is actually pretty awesome

>>29908918
The real fun is figuring out how many small, palm sized things it would take to result in a complete change on a planetary level...

You know that old Franklin story... "for want of a nail?"

Tiny... cheap... an an entire (metaphorical) war was lost because of one.

Give me the time, and her help, and ill find the one nail... to cause... change!

>>29904337
Slaanesh is the best option by far
>futa wife and ultra tongue
I assume she has a Claw/tounge/tentical too?

Nurgle is a close second

>>29909098
Agreed I'll be happy to hold claws

> Tzeentch gf
> Go to local convenience store
> Change all condoms to broken Condoms
Change all disinfectant, lube, and liquids to capsaicin
Wait.

>>29909278
Just as planned

>>29904337
Her or the Slaaneshi

>>29904337
Sorry guys, I'll be at Nagash's right when we plow through the Warp and into 40k for conquest, and at my left will be my skelly waifu.

>>29909581
if the plague gods waifu gives her gifts of healing through the warp, does that mean that there are Warp Deamons Of Isha floating around being homely?

>>29906831
Dying of old age after having fucked said beautiful daemon too many times to count.

>>29909721
Nah, Isha doesn't have daemonettes, just eldar

>>29909765
In Fantasy, she has the Wood Elves.
Alarielle the Radiant is the Everqueen, AKA God Emprah of Fantasy (so is Sigmar, but he's only that thematically for the most part).

Alarielle has a psychic battle with Slaanesh and won.

The Wood Elves are so feral, Alarielle is afraid of them. Alarielle is the Avatar of Isha. But Elves believe in a duality of all things (except the Dark Elves, who are willfully ignorant). Ariel, queen of the Wood Elves, is also an avatar of Isha.
Alarielle is more frightened of Ariel than of Chaos as a whole.

So in a way...

I choose tzeentch-waifu. She'll never let me lose hope ever again. And will allow me to do some silly shenanigans depending on how i can twist the power to my own ends.

For example trading cards. "I'll just convert these useless commons into money cards because they cost the same amount of ink and cardstock to make." Followed by seeing if i can change the cards themselves into much moolah by converting the cards directly into cash, as determined by their going market price.
So 10 guild gates turned into 10 Jace, the Mind sculptor, which are turned into however much jace sells for on star city. All without leaving my home.

Or otherwise just experimenting with my magic to see how far i can take it.

Slaanesh, then I can act out everything Ive ERP... mostly. 3' tounge btw, I reckon it can be hidden.

I was going to pick Khorne just for the powers but reading this thread convinced me to pick Tzeench instead. While endless endurance to kick people's asses forever would be cool, there is a good chance that I will never need that while the Tzeench power is as good as your imagination makes it.

Now, would I be able to chance a one dollar bill into a hundred? They are both made out of the same material so technically I won't be chancing anything but the design. It should work unless this power takes into account the value that a person puts on the item that is completely unrelated to the make up of the item.

>>29909956
>>29909867
OP made it clear you could do neither of those things

Stop trying to exploit shit to stupid levels instead of being clever like >>29909278
>>29908420

>>29905394
why can't poor people just go look for jobs in their yachts?

this isn't a fucking traditional game

>>29904337

Jesus fucking Christ, Tzeentch all the way. I mean, I don't think Tzeentch daemons are supposed to look that good, but I'm not complaining.

>>29910048
Go to bed Nurgle. Your canary is calling you.

>>29910048
It's from the lore of 2 traditional games and two genres of traditional
Go complain about quests and Elderscroll threads

>>29907877
That'd be Khorne (for the /pol/ack's unbridled rage) or Tzeentch (for supporting your belief in the jew-spiracy).

Remember, Slaanesh is into more than just sex and drugs.

Warhammer Fantasy, Slaanesh sometimes blesses artists (even non-devotees, even the faithful he has no plan on even trying to corrupt) with talents just to see what they make.
The Sistine Chapel in the Warhammer world is entirely Daemonettes. This was entirely unintentional, and Michelangelo's equivalent was exiled for it.
Warhammer Fantasy Beethoven's symphony played backwards is a children's rhyme about Slaanesh apparently.
Warhammer Fantasy Napoleon was made tall and sexy by Slaanesh, causing him to retire to a humble life.

>>29904337
>pick tzeench
>proceed to go full chaos god through bullshit plans and shenanigans
>make my god proud.
i'm entirely alright with this.

What would a Malice daemon be?

>>29910248
Yes, but sex and drugs are a big part
>Have a waifu who is also a beautiful singer and poet
I was already sold but sold more now

>>29910268
None because he's a retconed god of redundancy

>>29910248

It's a shame most seem to forget this. Though I would still probably pick Khornette, but it's a close race between the two.

>>29904337
>Nurgle: You have accepted life for what it is, and have moved on. You care little for pain as it's just apart of life, and don't get depressed
>Not being depressed, hating myself, and in mortal dread of my own inevitable demise
If you put that in a bottle I would crawl inside, sold.

>>29910315
Not to mention that if you buy her some art supplies, she's paint porn of the two of you that would put Rembrandt to shame.

>>29910369
>mortal dread of my own inevitable demise
Followers of Nurgle don't die though. They just hang out, diseased as all hell, for all time.

>>29910434
They kinda do die/rot but nurgle is also about rebirth and survival

Nurgle is probably the nicest gods, he's about coming to peace with the inevitable, which is why his followers and daemons are happy

>>29910434
That might just be a bonus then.

>>29904337
>changing apples to oranges
But you can't do that! They're not comparable!

How soft do you think she is?

Khornettes need more love.

Hot red skin
High endurance
Fun to fight with
Doesn't complain about your knifes or guns collection
Horny as fuck

>>29910537
All I know is how hard my dick is

>>29910537
Sickeningly soft

>>29904337
Khorne, cause goddamn that girl is adorable.

>all these people not picking Tzeench

Forget the powers, man! The tail feathers! THE TAIL FEATHERS!!

>>29910687
>tail feathers
But I'm ticklish. Like, really ticklish.

If I was trying to bang her from behind, I would end up convulsing with laughter and losing my boner.

>>29910268
Manic Depressive Bipolar tsundere girl.

>>29910687
C'mon, shake your tail-feather!

>>29909586
YEEEESSSSSS

>>29905257
Indeed, especially going for DAT TONGUE!

The Tentacle would be a good choice too, but if it's always moist it might be a hassle...

>>29906925
...WE'LL ADOPT!!!
...Or use surrogate, I think we've got some Crone World Eldar around just for that...

>>29910248
INDEED!
Mother is the Goddess of Excess and Perfection after all!
Whatever your Daemonette Waifu is into, she'll be INHUMANLY good at it.
She a Chef?
Enjoy eating the best damn cuisine until your gut burst!
She a Tailor?
You're always going to be wearing the most fashionable swag!

>>29904337
I was about to post some supportive artwork for Khorne but... old /tg/ images are just not safe for blue boards.

>>29910828
Post it in an imgur link

>>29905646
umf

>>29910723
Just as planned.

Just imagine like eating out the Nurgle deamonette. Hasn't cleaned herself down there for like, several centuries.

>>29910687
You had to remind me that Oglaf comic again.

>>29904337
The Khorne power seems to outclass the others completely.

The slaanesh+nurgle powers are useless. The Tzeentchian power is interesting/useful but ultimately 'mega' endurance sounds far more handy.

>>29911057
>Slaanesh and nurgle powers are useless
Son you aren't very realistic are you?

>>29910974
>Implying eating out is normally pleasant in taste/smell
I'll have her buffet anyday

A) Tzeentchette would be the most fun to play D&D with, even with only minor traits she'd be a god tier GM. Also dat boon
B) Tough. I wanna say the Nurglette but holy hell that smell, and it'd be an unconsummated marriage because of all the STIs so I'd probably feel guilty about it since she'd be so nice. So maybe I'd go with Khornette and team up with Tzeentchette to manage her anger? Could make a fun slice of life anime.

>>29910992

Always relevant.

>>29911057
Eh it's not that great, I would have had the current boons for the A choice and some more revved up powers for the B choice.

>Khorne
>Endurance
>Pro:Girl to go shooting on the weekends with.
>Con:Violent personality.

>Tzneetch
>Transmutation
>Pro: Girl to craft stuff with and make nefarious plots with.
>Con:Probably kinda frigid/distant.

>Slaneesh
>Extra manipulators
>Pro: All of the freaky sex, looks cute.
>Cons: So much sex; possibly an airhead/cheater.

>Nurgle
>Immune to pain/depression
>Pro: Cute girl.
>Con: Hello AIDS.

Tzneetch if she isn't an ice queen or a pansy. Manic mad scientest with a bit of a propensity for hyperbole is a good zone.

Khorne if she's in for being crafty AND destructive, and isn't needlessly violent. Individualistic, strong body and mind.

Slaanesh if she's dead loyal and clever. Freaky sex and naughty in-jokes.

Nurgle.....nah. Fuck nurgle.

Slaanesh is the best wife all around
Best boon
Prettiest girl
Always into your fetish
Might have a futa cock if your into that

>>29911123
>>Con: Hello AIDS.
>implying Nurglites care about being infected with <insert disease here>

Do they have to be girls or futa?

>>29911225
Implying Aids would phase you as a nurgle champ

Tzeench

I use the power to take any car I want

does the deamon have its own power too?

>>29911225
The OP said they were loyal
Slaanesh and Nurgle are great choices

>>29910336
Naw, he still exists. He just won't ever get new fluff (although there IS a rumor he'll be retooled back into Fantasy).

Malice is the option to modify your daemon waifu.

Obsessively clean two-eyed chubby Nurglette. By the time you wake up, she's cleaned everything in the house (including you!) and made breakfast because she just wants to be productive.

Tzeentchette who's perfectly curved and angled, has no fucking care in the world or plan in life and is totally okay with whatever you want to do today.

Khornette that has fun and is into shenanigans because she's not competitive and really just wants to sit back and laugh.

Prim and proper Daemonette with tact and reservations...which she'll drop quickly, since you're such a bad boy and bring out the wildness in her.

so do the deamons have their own powers?

>>29911859
Probably

>>29911859
I'd assume so, they are daemons after all.

>>29910537
Soft as puss filled diseased flesh.
So pretty soft probably.

>>29911910
>>29911918

awesome

I have the tzeench deamon use her powers for money and power

>>29912072
>it backfires and brings you to rack and ruin

>>29911259
whatever floats your boat

>>29910248
that's hilarious, got any references for this?

>>29912135

> Rack

what

also why ruin she's loyal to me

>>29912250
She does love you, she planned poverty so you stay loyal to her

Also Slaanesh is best waifu if loyal

>>29912250
She wouldn't Just as Planned you. You would fuck yourself over.

>>29912286

no tzeench is best girl

>>29912296

I disagree

all these people not pickign sexy deamonette waifu.

ishygddt

>>29904337
I pick none because I have an autistically large hatred towards daemonettes.

>>29912620
Word

>>29913274
>>29912620

acting like they all ain't sexy

>>29904337
I was tempted by Tzeench with his change ability, it could be useful for a lot of mundane utility

But I'm going with Khorne
>Khornate Daemonette
So is she always "blooming red"
blood makes for awesome lube, I'm in, I love my steaks raw

>Mega endurance
-Be able to work out for hours, thus accelerating any physical fitness regimen, never be out of shape again
-Better physical relationships with Daemonette bride

>>29913366
Ya, but you can do really lewd things to a Nurglette, like hold claws or kiss with our long tongues or even make love in the missionary postision with the lights ON

>>29913441
Plus with the 3' long tongue you can be a champ at oral sex, ditto with the tentical, the claw lets you open soda/beer super easy too

>>29912142
>MFW I have those exact boyshorts
I'm a guy

>>29913366
>acting like they all ain't sexy

they all may be but only one of them knows how to please someone properly

>>29912142
>>29912142
This...we need more of this

>>29909098
Wow, thats actually very well painted/sculpted
Company/Edition?

>>29913534
>Wow, thats actually very well painted/sculpted
>Company/Edition?

GW 5th edition i think

>>29913441
You will never get her pregnant

>>29913534
i was wrong i think they are 3rd or 4th edition

>>29904337
>Pick Tzeench
>Buy Wii U
>Buy gaems
>Turn Wii U into XBone when I'm bored of Wii U
>Turn XBone into Wii U when I'm bored of XBone
>Transform gaems
>Tzeenchette waifu cleans muh house

winna winna chicken dinna

>>29913711
You would not be able to turn a WiiU into an xbone

>>29913746
Too big?
They are of equal value
This one seems fair, it's not like he's trying to get more like other douches

>>29913776
>thinking the WiiU is as good as Xbone
You crazy son

>>29904337
If I pick Nurgle, I can basically float through life however I want.

In ten years, I'll be dying in the streets after the Crips attack, my cardboard sign soaked with blood. I'll have a smile on my face as I bleed out. Paramedics will run up, like "oh man, please! Stay with me! We'll get you to a hospital!"

"Nah man, I'm cool here."

And I'd have lived a shitty life, but through virtue of not giving a shit, I would've been the happiest man on Earth. And isn't that what life is really all about?

>>29913630
With enough love, warp magic and semon I'll figure it out

>>29913776
the xbone is a LOT bigger than the wii U. And why would you want an xbone anyways?

>>29913812
>Thinking the XBone is as good as the Wii U

>>29913630
>uh uh uh
>you didn't say the magic word

>>29913825
what's the sign got on it
"i'm pretty much fine with everything going on right now"?

>>29913915
Probably something like that. Maybe like "how are you doing?" or maybe "if you could give me a dollar that'd be great since I need some lunch please".

>>29913915

... I'd go with a Slaaneshy waifu, and talk her into having a threesome with the Nurglette.

... I'll have more unimaginable STDs than you can imagine, but IT'LL BE WORTH!

... and I'd go with the crab claw... but only if it comes with an extra arm. Otherwise, I'd take the tongue.

Does the slaneeshite have a penis?
Cause if not forget it

Otherwise, I'd have to say khorne, cause it would be nice to be all healthy and filled with murderous rage.

>>29913995
It's been asked and agreed that she does only if you are into it so mine will

>>29913995
also, i'll take the forked tongue.

I don't want to look like a weirdo or anything.

>People complain about that /tg/ doesn't love /d/
>In this thread the biggest and most frequently asked question is if the slaaneshi comes in futa

>>29910974
eeeeewwww!

Rolled 3376

>>29914084
man, /d/ is /tg/'s playground. one cannot exist without the other

>>29914112
Go home loyalist

>>29914084
How else are we supposed to post explicit W40k fanart? Speaking of which somebody should start a thread on /d/ so we can post lewd things.

>>29913630

I'll still try. A lot. One could say excessively. Slaanesh may smile upon me.

>>29914193
Posting them on imgur and linking in thread
Duh, just make sure to spoiler the links

>>29914019
I want to pick tzeneech but it would be like, no sex, all the time...

(or if not, you wouldn't enjoy it...)

>>29913479
i found that idea entertaining. the gorgon effect. but with love instead of statues. and just blinking in and out of reality just to try and trick some one into looking at you

There has to be some way to exploit that tzeenich power...

does it count if I buy in bulk? Oh, i know, you could take something that is really, really expensive, and turn it into lots of little things that are heavy, bulky, or hard to distribute!

You'd save a ton of money on shipping!

>>29913979
>... I'll have more unimaginable STDs than you can imagine, but IT'LL BE WORTH!
Not unless you're a Nurgle worshiper
Also trying to take more than one is poor form

>>29910974
And to think, you wont care

How "mundane" are we talking here?

I mean, not to diss the mail order bride or anything, but you really have no idea what your getting with that, and they all sound lovely...

>>29914225
i just finished rolling up the factions for a black crusade game. i used deathwatch to make a chapter and creation tables pulled from 14dchan. so far i created an ultramarine chaos warband that specializes in diplomacy and terror tactics. former fleet base now on a fortress world with wasteland terrain and a massive pirate fleet ally. also aligned to slaanesh. oh man. im finding dialog combat entertaining.

the enemies. ork freebootas who excel at raiding tactics. and eldar trying to stop the chapter at every turn. also specializing in raiding/drop tactics. its gunna be full of fire fights

No Nurgle Chicks

>>29914338
just dont think about it. let it guide you on its own. where ever you are. it was ordained to be so

>Anything but Khornette

>>29907711
Raging Heroes has some pretty good Daemonette counts-ases, and a lot of other good female models.

>>29914393
Things that aren't overpoweredly stupid
Changing a snickers to a babyruth
Or your master card to your visa

Convenience mainly

>>29914449
>says Khorne girls are better
>Post slaaneshi juggs and lingerie

>>29914452
that sounds like it has a "no fun" clause written in.

>>29907711
Chinese metal recast diaz-nettes~
http://www.yoymart.com/en/games-toys/warhammer/warhammer-40k-model/warhammer-40k-chaos-daemonettes-of-slaanesh.html

>>29914452
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wj4Qk1AwIos

you mean this?

>>29914449
>Eternal period
>Eternal super horniness, combined with mega endurance
Fuck it I'll take the anger

>>29914506
Dose hips, and braids doe.

Plus, flat is just as fine for me.

>>29914084
I know that artist. She draws penises.

Khorne and Tzeentch

They're the hot ones too.

>>29914538
No just a "no abuse, must be creative" clause
>DURF I TURN 1$ NOTES TO 100$ NOTES BECAUSE SAME INK AND PAPER
That shit is cheep and boring, as well as breaks balance

The guys who use it to change games and car keys are at least original and clever

>>29914449
RAAAAAAGGGEE FUUUUUUUCCCKKK!!!!!!!

>>29914576
Yes and?
>she
Really?

>>29914587
But that power doesn't really DO anything unless you exploit it somehow, its just kinda useless.

>>29914564
>implying daemonettes don't have hips

>>29914564
>>29914506
>Not wanting Khornate DFC

Rolled 7473

>>29914627
actually is really practical in a mundane sense.

need exact change, turn big bill into change.

forgot keys? turn any other key into your key. or the key of a person you want to stalk

>>29914627
You aren't thinking like a true Tzeenchian

>>29914587
oh hey, thats true! you'd only ever need one video game, and you could play them all!

But how much would keys be worth that don't belong to you? Priceless, probably...

>>29914637
But no braids, and you can't play-wressle a Slaaneshi!

>no Chaos Undivided waifu

>>29914725
That's cultist-chan.

>>29904337
I'm way too far into Tzeentch, the choice has been made for me, and I'm okay with that

>>29914725
Chaos undivided members get their pick of the 4
Abandon I'm sure has one of each, sadly he can't hold them because he lacks the necessary requirements

>>29914751
A pretty good deal

>>29914751
>Cultist with anything but DFC
no, get those oversized udders out of here

>>29914789
Some of us like WOMEN (and futas) not little girls/boys (or at least little boys not dressed as little girls)

>>29914714
>>29914684

yup

if you think just a little bit your good

>>29914755
>sadly he can't hold them because he lacks the necessary requirements

What are you talking about?

>>29914806
Female chests in nearly all their forms are to be loved, mate.

>>29914789
It depends on how long it's been since she's last died.

Also on who fucked up during her last resurrection.

and which god really likes her right now

>>29914806
Dude, I'm okay with reasonably sized breasts

>>29914751
This pic is a fucking back problem on steroids

I am surprised that no one has thought of one of the best uses of the tzench one.


convert army A into army b. convert old outdated rulebooks to new ones.

YOU WOULD NEVER AGAIN HAVE TO SPEND A DIME AGAIN ON GW STUFF TO PLAY THE GAMES EVER.

as others noted changing consoles ect.. your pc will never be outdated. touch it and now it's got the latest hardware you want.

the possibility is endless.

>>29914858
>Depends on which god really likes her
And how!

>>29914642
>>29914789
The "D" stands for "disgusting" right?

>>29914868
It has to be small mundane objects, so while you COULD alter individual minis, YOu could not alter an entire PC ( or likely even parts of it) and not a rulebook either

>>29914886

>>29914907
stahp, those all are really shitty in drawing

>>29914751
>tfw gf would probably be cool with dressing up as cultist-chan
>she's really pale
>cultist-chan is tan

It just wouldn't work.

>>29914907

>>29914886
She's a grab bag of potential.

Eventually her faith will pay off in the end and like how the SoB's occasionally do paladiny things, Cultist-chan will ascend to greatness and dippose Abbadon and lead a Crusade that will finally topple the Imperium

>>29914930
Can't expect it to be perfect mate, roll with it, she probably also doesn't have teeth like a set of keys

>also see what she would want you to dress up as, this becomes a new ship

Rolled 9847

>>29914930
well, she has to do the voice

>>29914904

how small is small?

1 inch 2 4 6 8 10?

a foot? 2?

>>29914904
>It has to be small mundane objects, so while you COULD alter individual minis, YOu could not alter an entire PC ( or likely even parts of it) and not a rulebook either

Actually with the rulebooks being available in e-book format thorugh black libarary you could easly convert a dvd to have it on there.

hence you would never need to buy the books again

on another note.. why did we never get a greater deamon of tznench looking similar to this?

>>29915010
I imagine what can be held in hand
With the PC/rule books thing it's more VALUE, not size.
Old PC parts are near worthless, books arguably less so (it might work there but probably not)

>>29905100
Great minds think alike my brethren of dark complexion.

>>29915023
Boy howdy I need to go to sleep.

Didn't read the file name and just opened the picture. Thought it was slaneesh because it's knee looked like a giant cock at first glance.

>Come home from a long hard day at work
>As you enter the door Khornette waifu tackles you
>Play fight until you're reinvigorated
>In bed

Slaanesh > Nurgle = Tzeech > Khorne
It's hard to chose between Cheerful chubby qt3.12 and Touch feathery tail (and convineace powers)

>>29915089
that nosebleed

Actually if we do say chaos undivided gets us cultist-chan, what boon do we get?

>>29915113
Agreed

>>29915055

so anything you can hold with one hand?

not bad

as for the replacing computers just hold something valuable in the same hand like money or gold

>>29915183
A fancy set of steak knives

Thus the Emperor's light was lost on /tg/.

>>29915223
Fancy enough to kill loyalists with?

>>29914587
Really, you could take it to vegas and clean house very, very briefly.

>mortgage everything
>bet it all on one hand of black jack
>constantly change your face down card to whatever you need to win.

>>29915231
I (The OP) am the best Cultist Apostate ever

>>29915244
No, the kind you see on infomercials

>>29915251
or take a losing lottery ticket, and change it to the winning numbers. this one might be more difficult, but you could probably make a living manipulating scratch off lottery tickets.

>>29915251
That too is clever, though I imagine you might get kicked out for winning too much

>>29915264
I'll take it.

>>29915292
That's why you have to do it quick. Most of the cases where they kick people out are where they suspect you of card counting, which isn't a system for quick gains, but sustained, gradual gains. They can't really kick someone out for getting lucky.

Rolled 3907

>>29915279
dont they all have fixed serials? you would need to know the right serial for the right prize. Very difficult i think. I think you can make a decent amount of money by playing card games at fairs or informal poker matches

>>29915349
I'm not sure. Back when I actually bought scratch offs (or rather, my parents bought them for me), you turned them in at the store you got them from, and they gave you the money. Maybe the check over a certain amount.

Best thread on /tg/ today

>>29915251

wouldn't they check the deck and realize something is wrong

>>29915346
They use new decks for their matches right?

Changing the card might work out if you do it sparingly enough for it to look like the manufacturer fucked up.

>>29915023
its got taint on its taint

Rolled 708

>>29915389
I am pretty sure they scratch the "not scratch" section. Well, I am from south america dunno how it is in the US or Europe

>>29915413
the pic is from the old rt book Lost and the damned.. it's tzench not slanesh .. you need slaves to the darkness to find the one with taint on the taint

>>29915396
Just tap it real quick when the dealer pulls it back or something.

>>29915411
Short sleeves are a must

Building on the changing cards idea, Use it to fuck with a "Magician" when he pulls the "is THIS your card" trick.
Only just change the face value of the card, not the marking he has on the back of it.


Also
>buy bargain brand hazelnut spread
>change to nutella
>save much money

>>29916012
>eating nutella

It's like you want to build up your insulin resistance.

Rolled 4814

>>29916012
could you change water into alcohol?
in order to become the modern Jesus. The fellow present in every party?

>>29916124
No cuz alchohol is a serious step up
I guess maybe a really shitty beer like coors, but thats stretching it

>>29916099
It was more an example than anything else.

I would've personally gone "buy cheap rotgut Scotch, turn into the Macallan 18yr."

>>29905646
Dammit boner, we talked about this!

>>29916281
>>29916195

if what been posted before is right
value seems to matter so that doesn't work

>>29910553
Cannot agree more to this

>>29904337
>Tzeench: Limited Magic of Change: You can change small/mundane objects into small mundane objects of similar value, I.e. A pen to pencil. 1 dollar to 4 quarters, apples to oranges
Coke into Pepsi?

>>29907644
>>29908151
I'd just go with the Tentacle Vagina myself...
All the lewdness of Handholding in genitalia form!

>>29913630
QUIT RUBBING IT IN!!!

>>29914836
My Goddess... Abandon really IS a Potato, isn't he?

>>29914954
Nah, Cultist LIKE being the little guy...
If she really wanted power, she would have taken up her position as the most powerful of the Sensei!

>>29917588
It's not like cultist could say no if the big 4 told her to do it.

>>29917616
But that's the thing...
The Big 4 are frightened by her potential to surpass the Emperor, and at the same time genuinely adore her because they all took turns raising her.

>>29917695
If what I've read is true, Slaanesh as actually fucked her at least once. Something about wanting an army with her "unique" outlook or something.

I didn't catch as it turns out living like cultist does is not good for your fertility.

>>29917761
...Where was that from?

>>29917831
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9352629/1/Cultist-Chan-and-the-Girls-Night-Out

It's linked on the 1d4chan page but I'm not sure how many people have actually read it, or it's relative canon status