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29714363 No.29714363 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

You know it's funny that this question is never really asked on this board:
If you were transported to the 40k universe and given the option, what faction would you belong to?

Notes: You would be roughly mid-rank of your faction (Specialty officer of IG, Lesser Commissar, Standard Marine/CSM, Preacher of Chaos, Second level tau of your caste, etc)
Your body would be equal to the standard of your faction, Your memory would be altered but your personality would stay the same

>> No.29714446
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I'll be the kindest Commissar

>> No.29714514
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I gotta roll Eldar man.

>Craftworlds are comfy tier
>Women are god tier beautiful
>Enjoy the finer things in life
>Be heroic aspect warrior and sweep maiden world girls off their feet

Aside from all the horrific war there is alot of nice times to be had as an Eldar. Path novels has them chilling in bars and attending art shows.

>> No.29714537

Bit repetitive.

Consider making the qualifiers dumber.

"Such stronk"

"very loyalty"

could be a good start.

>> No.29714547
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Whats the downside to being an Ork Boi?
There isn't any ya git

>> No.29714576
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I'll keep the faith and fondle my underling cultists

>> No.29714605
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It's all about dat eldar ass

>> No.29714644
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>> No.29714653
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Dat sweet, sweet sylph ass.

>> No.29714716


>> No.29714745

Do sisters of battle get maternity leave if they get pregnant?

>> No.29714785


I'd imagine they're abstinent. Dat ass is for the Emprah only.

>> No.29714805

some are, some aren't

>> No.29714844
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I wanna be a pirate in tight leather pants

>> No.29714882

So yeah, you totally could be an inquisition attache to the Sisters.

>> No.29714894

Depends on the order. I imagine that getting knocked up while deployed would be frowned upon, though.

>> No.29714978

My girlfriend and I figured that they would, but that there would be stiff penalties for the neglect of duty that would come with maternity leave and advancing pregnancy, especially from one of the orders militant. When born the child would be given over to the schola and the mother suitably disciplined (many hours of prayer and penitence duties but probably not a full reduction to repentia except in the harshest circumstances).

>> No.29715079
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Just be ok with your soul being nommed by hot-succubi-elves

>> No.29715107
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>> No.29715197

the only imperial choice i can think of where you aren't completely fucked would be inquisition or rogue trader.

the only other sensible choice i can think of would be orks. has the advantage that their mindset will keep you more happy than anything else in the entire setting.

unless jokaero a bunch of jolly tinkerers and inventors. but nobody understands them so nobody knows what they are like.
but having a second pair of hands would be pretty funky.

>> No.29715373
File: 132 KB, 600x848, raege.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Become Commissar
>Shoot Boone because pskyer
>Few troubles because Commissar
>Get Raege waifu

>> No.29715587
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Yummy Yummy blueberry juice as a human

>> No.29715823
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Zap everything into nonexistence.

>> No.29715851
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would be sweet to be a unique hive tyrant or something, whenever you die you just have to wait a bit and you get a nice shiny new body...

also everything is edible!

>> No.29716002
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Noise Marines: When you can bang sex monsters, do cocaine and never stop partying, they really are the most sound option

>> No.29716217

Literally the only thing Noise Marines are able to enjoy is noise.

>> No.29716250

Tau don't even allow inter-caste relations.

>> No.29716285
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World Eater, plz go

>> No.29716312
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He won't even get THAT far dude

>> No.29716320

Learn your fucking lore. Their brains are wired so they find everything boring but the cacophony of battle.

>> No.29716325
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>Not worshiping Khorne and becoming the lord of war

>> No.29716351
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Pfft I don't want to be a menstruating little sperglord

Keep angry pure

>> No.29716373

>noise marines
>the most sound option
>sound option
was that intended or not?

>> No.29716377

>literally 1984

>> No.29716399
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[Screams of rage]

>> No.29716415
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Yes it was
I thought I was being clever

>> No.29716473
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I'll stick to the protection of my "Ward" as a Grey Knight

>> No.29716476

you were, very subtle, i liked it.

>> No.29716579

Oi, quit ya foolin' 'round and get back ta werk, I'z in need of extra DAKKA, I want some'ting shooty dat shoot choppy tings AND I WANT IT BY YESTERDAY

>> No.29716615


>> No.29716622
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An Ultramarine, the pinnacle of mankind's defenders.

>> No.29716662

Can I be in the Deathwatch? I want to be in the Deathwatch. Preferably as a Novamarine.

>> No.29716671
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No I mean the Ward that would really keep me safe as a GK

>> No.29716712
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Blood Raven or BT

>> No.29716773

im pretty sure their armor and Aegis would still very decently protect them from a nerf bat

am I the only one that has this fantasy about skinning this fucker and feeding his flesh to pigs and then hose him with lemon juice, salt, pepper spray and alcohol and then trap him in a giant microwave with 15 pounds of aluminium and let the fucker die?

I mean, I dont play the game, but I've seen, heard and been told about all this fucker's done. tell me im not the only one.

>> No.29716811

>Doesn't even play
>Hate'n on da Mat-ster
I'm not even sure if it's crowded on the bang wagon anymore

>> No.29716817

>I mean, I dont play the game
Are we /v/ now?

>> No.29716864
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>I mean, I dont play the game, but I've seen, heard and been told about all this fucker's done. tell me im not the only one.

>> No.29716898
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>I hate Ward because other people told me to

>> No.29716943


>> No.29716968

Is canon, yes.

>> No.29716980


The Farsight Enclaves probably allow it.

>> No.29716991

Prove it.

>> No.29717001

I don't know shit about 40k. But Kroot are fucking cool. What's a mid-rank Kroot? If that sucks, I'll just be IG and get laid all the time, just like real-life mid rank soldiers.

>> No.29717005

We have the endless supply of lurkers who contribute only by trolling. Constant shitposting when it isn't needed and so on.

It happens. Boards seep across.

>> No.29717008


Official policy is only GW, FW, and BL are canon.

>> No.29717021

Inquisitor of course.

>Middle of road is Inquisitor (between Interrogator and Inquisitor Lord)
>Strong enough to not be killed easily.
>Weak enough to not have too many enemies yet.
>Can do whatever the hell I want, hook up with Eldar, private slaaneshi cult, destroy a planet as long as I don't do it too much or too often, and still be considered loyal to the Imperium.

>> No.29717022

A mid-tier Inquisitor on a backwater. Important enough to get minor life extension, some cool toys, a nice house and the ability to pull local bitches and have their meddling fathers thrown in the dungeon, but not so important that I'm expected to do anything.

It'd be a sweet, sweet life.

>> No.29717025

/tg/ can be more cannon than the books sometimes (Goto being an exsample)
Why can't one of the books for the games

>> No.29717034




>> No.29717058
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Which is why the Achilus Crusade and Hammers of Dorn are mentioned in the 6e Space Marine codex.
And why the Slaugth show up in the FW Horus Heresy book.

>> No.29717060

oh, so I need to spend 1 fucking grand on a game that i wont ever be able to play with anyone ever that i cant share and understand the pain of fellow Elegen/tg/entlemans
>biggest pleb
excuse me, but is it a private and closed club to hate on someone because i nobody sent me the memo. Do we all hate Nickleback? yes. Do we all hate Miley Cyrus, Bieber, Minaj, Jonas Brothers, 1D? yes. do we absolutely need to have their entire collection to do so? NO!
fuck off and be happy I understand and feel your rage. cant be a good guy on the internet anymore?

>> No.29717063

The policy is enforced by the Ethereals.

FE don't follow the Ethereals anymore and they live in a democracy.

>> No.29717072

No, the game books themselves ENCOURAGE fannon.
You're blueberry waifu can't hear you online

>> No.29717081

You are the biggest pleb I've ever met.

>> No.29717097
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>> No.29717120

>"good guy"
>Not a pleb

That aside, only people who read the fluff and play the games have reason to be mad at him (and they aren't even anymore)

I play the RPGs and only really join the jokes. You dumbass pleb

>> No.29717127

Each caste lives on a different planet, and the gue'vesa have their own separate planet.

I find this doubtful.

>> No.29717128

Pretty sure GW policy is that everything is canon, even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff.

>> No.29717151

>Let's put it another way: anything with a 40K logo on it is as official as any Codex... and at least as crammed full of rumours, distorted legends and half-truths.

>> No.29717172
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Trolling, Pleb, retarded or 12?

>> No.29717176

If you weren't new you'd realize /tg/'s hate towards Ward has mellowed out a lot. It's ok to criticize his lore decisions, but his balance honestly isn't too bad anymore and mindless hate towards him is silly. Your post was pure sadism towards a man you only know from hearing people on the internet talk about.
>Do we all hate Nickleback? yes. Do we all hate Miley Cyrus, Bieber, Minaj, Jonas Brothers, 1D?
Are you 16? It's like reading Ultimate Guitar forums all over again.

>> No.29717181

Only a pleb would write such a post.

>> No.29717183

>Note: An even more recent addition is Fantasy Flight Games, who produce the 40K roleplaying game, but even now, I’m not sure just where they stand. Like I said, this is a complicated hellhole of treachery, madness and deceit. As it stands, the official line is that there are three factions empowered to “create IP” (an exact quote), and that’s GW, BL and FW.

-From the Loose Canon article

Hammers of Dorn first featured in a card game way before FFG. Also GW can pick and choose what they want from Third Party sources but it doesn't mean that the rest of it is worth anything.

Because dats the rules.

>> No.29717250

according to GW, Grechen and Orks fuck

Goto wrote that eldar prefer IG armor

Are you really telling me that only they can be cannon?

>> No.29717259

>Note: An even more recent addition is Fantasy Flight Games, who produce the 40K roleplaying game, but even now, I’m not sure just where they stand. Like I said, this is a complicated hellhole of treachery, madness and deceit. As it stands, the official line is that there are three factions empowered to “create IP” (an exact quote), and that’s GW, BL and FW. Given that the 40K RPG is mostly made by folks working in or around the main three companies, I think it’s fair to say that its lore counts as canon, too.

You disingenuous motherfucker.

>> No.29717268

Did they come from the holy trinity?

Then, yes.

>> No.29717276

More like 12 look at his overly done details of violence. He may as well shop at hot-topic

>> No.29717301

You must be like one of those guys who insists that Alignments MUST be objective, (dispite others saying they don't treat them that way) just to say "DUR D&D IS BAD"

>> No.29717307

>Given that the 40K RPG is mostly made by folks working in or around the main three companies, I think it’s fair to say that its lore counts as canon, too.

From the Loose Canon article.

Fuck off you lying nigger.

>> No.29717346

>Given that the 40K RPG is mostly made by folks working in or around the main three companies, I think it’s fair to say that its lore counts as canon, too.

The writer/interviewer personal opinion on the canon standing of FFG is irrelevant.

What matters is what he was told (As it stands, the official line is that there are three factions empowered to “create IP” (an exact quote), and that’s GW, BL and FW).

>> No.29717348
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I was going to make a post about what I do aside from playing the your unbalanced and overpriced game, but no. this is what i have to say to you /tg/
>pic related
You used to be nice /tg/, you changed

>> No.29717372
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Cultist Apostate, unaligned
All the pretty traps like heretics

>> No.29717380

You're a fucking liar. What he's saying is he's not been told on the canon standing of FFG because it wasn't commented on, but he thinks it's canon because it's closely affiliated.

Suck my cock.

>> No.29717423

Confirmed for 14-year-old.

>> No.29717442

>Write a sadistic post about torturing a guy you don't know about
>claim to be a good guy
>say we're mean for not hating someone hard enough
Grow up dude.

>> No.29717444
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Good retort, I'm sure you needed to hear me say that to feel good, because you can't think for your self, pleb

>> No.29717450
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>style on everyone
>they love you for it
truly, no greater choice

>> No.29717552
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Nids. Nothling like the closest comrades in the universe. Mid-rank means I'm at least synapse.

My personality remains the same? I would be a portion of the hivemind that wants to be a little girl? I'm not sure how that would work.

>> No.29717565
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expect, ya know... Chaos

>> No.29717591

You mean they each caste dominates a planet like they did in the empire.

It doesn't mean they aren't members of other castes or aliens on the planet.

>> No.29717622

Yes, it does. Very much so.

>> No.29717650
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Pathetic compared to the Greatest of them All.

>> No.29717666

Orkk seems like the beat option

>> No.29717685

It doesn't.

Other members of the castes must be present for the planets to function.

>> No.29717712

Aspiring Sorcer of The Thousand Sons, or I'd be a Heretech, looking to blend sorcery and technology, and an aspiring Magos.

Honestly, with my studies and current job, I'd be closer to the Admech side in practice, Thousand Son in spirit.

>> No.29717733
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air case flies all the ships.
earth caste build all the settlements and other tech.

so by your logic members of the fire caste would not be able to live in houses or use air transportation on the entire planet...

>> No.29717770

You're a genestealer.

>> No.29717780

Don't forget that the water dudes are the bureaucrats and traders.

>> No.29718045

Fightin' and chillin' with buddies when they're home.
Shit I bet they're cool. Has anyone read Nick Kymes stuff?

>> No.29718128

I'd rather be a serf than a nigger

>> No.29718170
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They also have slow reflexes, little Fast Attack, slow replenishment, and eternally low numbers.

>> No.29718172

Grey Knights obviously

>> No.29718176

no other sentence truly encapsulates the progress of 10000 years of human civilization.

>> No.29718215
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Dark Angels, so that I can have a cute little alien waiting on me.

>> No.29718272
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>They also have slow reflexes, little Fast Attack, slow replenishment, and eternally low numbers.

thinking about it now, GW might have been inspired by certain elements of the rasta culture. i never made the connection before. sneaky.

>> No.29718308

Except they're just white men in blackface.

>> No.29718411
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my nig

>> No.29718437

yeah... not sure why they went with the whole "jet black skin, red eyed dragon-men" thing. seems kinda naff.

And it's not like they have a problem with introducing other ethnicities either, there are severeal other examples of that.

>> No.29718450

>implying i'm not a PDF kill squad member
Never leave home. Hellgun. Carapace armor. Get laid. Defend shit I actually care about. Actually have an off-duty life.

>> No.29718465


The only sensible option is first mate to a rogue trader.

>> No.29718473
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the dark age of technology seems nice

>> No.29718499

Congratulations you're effectively dead.

>> No.29718545


Chaos. Only chance of immortality.

>> No.29718550
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That it does.

>> No.29718637

The idea of a Rogue Trader sounds good, but wouldn't a middle-tier Rogue Trader not be the actual trader himself but in fact one of his flunkies stuck slaving away in the bowels of a giant ship? I am reminded of the freedmen on the Inquisition prison ship from the Ragnar/Space Wolf novels.

>> No.29718703


Middle tier on a Trader ship would likely be one of their lesser officers, not a crate-mover.

>> No.29718719

Ward is a trolly bastard, and has written some decent rules. His fluff is meh, so neckbeards rage (although a dex done by Ward generally stands the test of time).

>> No.29718819
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Probably either Eldar or Dark Eldar. I'd love to see Commorragh but I'd probably get sick of playing the political intrigue game after awhile and I'm not all that into hedonistic pain and suffering and stuff.

So I think Eldar would be cool. Maybe a Ranger or Warlock.

>> No.29718839
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Lighting insence on a Forge World since forever ago.

>> No.29718901
File: 90 KB, 656x596, Triarch_Praetorian2b.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I will be a Warden of Eternity, Protector of the Kingdoms of old, Keeper of the ancient laws and codes, Preserver of Honour and nobility, and Lawbringer to a savage and lawless galaxy.

I am a Triarch Praetorian. The sorrow of ages and an eternity of service are mine, such is the duty of the Praetorian.

>> No.29718940

>>His fluff is meh

>Newcron fluff

>Iyanden fluff

No taste confirmed.

>> No.29718945

Dibs on being a Machine Spirit.

>> No.29718986

Even better. A little girl genestealer.

Perhaps a strain that was created to look harmless and confuse the target?

>> No.29719078

Lolis cannot be controlled, even by the hive mind
They have their own hive mind, full of butterflies and onii-chans
The moment a race creates Loli, they are doomed

>> No.29719156

I would, if I could, chose to be a psyker in the services of the inquisition, or a rogue trader. Of course I would prefer not to enter into the universe of 40k in the first place, its not friendly there.

>> No.29719170
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>> No.29719189

>Of course I would prefer not to enter into the universe of 40k in the first place, its not friendly there.

Don't get turned away by the ''grimdark''. Canonically the worlds are 40K aren't so different from our current day earth.

>> No.29719228
File: 140 KB, 963x580, imperial life.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Canonically the worlds are 40K aren't so different from our current day earth.
Prove it.

>> No.29719247

Cain novels.

>> No.29719275

Cain thinks Soylens Veridians is delicious. He is not an unbiased source.

>> No.29719289

Damn, I was just joking
lolis truly are the most powerful force in the universe

>> No.29719291

Don't have a such a bitch fit when reality comes into play that everything can't be grimderp

>> No.29719318
File: 169 KB, 580x481, laughing necron whores.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>when reality comes into play

Fanon =/= canon, faggot. The Imperium is a horrific shithole.

>> No.29719321


I'm talking more about the entire, your soul is eternally doomed, and you are always going to be under the influence of the chaos gods even if only partially, even more so should you do the things you desire. Also your entire planet can get wiped out, without there being anything you can do about it.

>> No.29719340
File: 73 KB, 751x862, 1390457415192.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Might as well embrace the Chaos to begin with, right?

>> No.29719344

1- Cain isn't fannon
2- GW encourges Fannon because the Universe is kinda huge, and anything goes

>> No.29719348

Well, shit. Immortal psyker lolis. Twins, to boot. Urge to throw them at my RT group rising.

Is there anything 40k diesn't have?

>> No.29719374

>Cain isn't fannon
Cain is an unreliable narrator.

>> No.29719377


>Is there anything 40k doesn't have?


>> No.29719415

I'd say he is
and an Inquisitor even corrects him when he's wrong in the books

He's Black Library cannon and the setting isn't as retarded as the wargames like to make it

>> No.29719418

The chances of any of that happening are very low. It's a big galaxy.

You might as well not get outside because you might get hit by lightening.

>> No.29719425

>Is there anything 40k doesn't have?
Nice things.

>> No.29719464 [SPOILER] 
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>> No.29719489

>an Inquisitor even corrects him when he's wrong in the books
Yeah, Inquisitors are even MORE reliable narrators! I mean, when Jaq Draco was creaming himself over Arbitrators shooting rioters, I totally got the feeling that this was a good thing because he said so.

The third person objective narrator paints the Imperium as a bleak place devoid of hope. Deal with it.

>> No.29719611
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>People who live in the setting who describe it other than hell are lieing to an in-world audience, because I want it grimdark

>> No.29719662

chaos space marines fo sho. Cuz freedom.

>> No.29719692

No, they just have a different perspective. One incompatible with ours.

"Nice" by Imperial standards is "Liberia" by ours.

>> No.29719713

>Most sound option
10/10 I sharted a little

>> No.29719728

Also, have a look at most of the world; ie, the second and third world combined. Real life isnt too far from grimdark a lot of the time.

>> No.29719762

>paradise worlds, argi-worlds, shrine worlds

Nah, the standard of living in Imperials worlds that's not hive worlds are pretty high.

Hive worlds are a minority by the way.

>> No.29719790

Only if we lose the rocks!

I for one would like to be an Ork Nob
lotza boyz
Lotza loot
Lotza fightin


>> No.29719812

>the second and third world combined
Yeah, hardly nice places.
>paradise worlds
Are places where nobles hunt the native populace for fun
A lifetime of superstitious fear and backbreaking labor. Only depiction of one I can think of involved psykers being broken on the wheel.
>shrine worlds
>the standard of living in Imperials worlds that's not hive worlds are pretty high
Picture I posted was CIVILIZED worlds. As in, the most common type of all.

>> No.29719813
File: 170 KB, 800x600, 1389059988967.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

> spending $1000 on 40k

thats cute

>> No.29719833

Should also link to

>> No.29719847
File: 44 KB, 586x387, 40K Characters 477.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

For me?
Any faction of a mid rank?

Rogue Trader.
I would be a mid ranking officer, maybe a good deck commander, raid leader, minor navigator or minor bridge crew. But you know what, i would follow my Lord Captain to death, as my father and grandfather had before me, and my children and grandchildren will after me.

I will explore the skies, see untold riches and face unknown foes. And hey, the boss man/or woman, gets themselves a new ship? Lotta new openings up the ladder.

>> No.29719875

But don't hive world hold the majority of the population?

>> No.29719893

>A lifetime of superstitious fear and backbreaking labor. Only depiction of one I can think of involved psykers being broken on the wheel.
No, many of them have large machines doing most of the work as per Cain books

>Picture I posted was CIVILIZED worlds. As in, the most common type of all.
Civilized worlds are described as earth-like today

Everytime you bring up that shitty piece of cannon and ignore everone else's

>> No.29719943

>many of them have large machines doing most of the work as per Cain books
Never worked on a farm, huh. Still backbreaking labor.
>Civilized worlds are described as earth-like today

>Everytime you bring up that shitty piece of cannon and ignore everone[sic] else's

>> No.29719987

>Never worked on a farm, huh. Still backbreaking labor.
Nice backpedaling faggot. Modern Farm work isn't anywhere near 40k bad and agro worlds are nice to live on

>> No.29719999


Nazi Germany was like that and it was a nice place.


you were given but refuse to accept it.

>> No.29720008

The great thing about the 40k setting is you can make it your own. Marginal lore is easy to disregard and change to your own liking. Its a big galaxy covering 10,000+ years of action, plenty of room for everything.

>> No.29720047

>Modern Farm work isn't anywhere near 40k bad
You're right. The oppressive government is what does that.
>Nazi Germany was like that
Dude what? Are you a retard?
>you were given but refuse to accept it.
Give me an objective source on the Imperium being a nice place. Give me a single source on civilized worlds being "like modern-day Earth". Give me ANYTHING.

>> No.29720054

That is true, but some asspies need there lore exact and constant throughout an entire galaxy

>> No.29720057

Aww that poor robot wants a friend, maybe he'll be able to convince it to do some weird butt stuff.

>> No.29720064

>some asspies need there lore exact and constant throughout an entire galaxy
Yeah, like the asspies who go "THE WHOLE IMPERIUM IS GENERALLY NICE".

>> No.29720075

>Give me a single source on civilized worlds being "like modern-day Earth". Give me ANYTHING.
Serendipidus from The Emporer's Finest
Suck a dick faggot

>> No.29720103

Autistic for thinking that not every single place in the galaxy is is hell?
Thats just a logical assumption, because it couldn't work if it was 100% as in the lore.

You just spert lore and expect everything to be terrible and can't have any variation. Thus autismal

>> No.29720104
File: 9 KB, 208x272, Cain.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

It IS nice.

>> No.29720140

Is a place Cain, an Imperial subject, thinks might have been nice if it wasn't engulfed in war.
Yeah, and logically the Imperium wouldn't function at all. What the fuck is your point?
>You just spert lore
You just spurt fanon.
Go away, Cain.

>> No.29720163

It wasn't in the book
and he was there, it was nice
Read a book nigger

>> No.29720172

The Zombie Plague is a Warp-disease, and it can only infect those who have no hope or faith in their hearts. In the uncaring grind of Imperial life, the vast majority of the populace can be counted amongst that number.

-Typhus WotM, Index Chaotica

The Imperium is a great place to live, dawg.

>> No.29720189

*It wasn't engulfed in war in the book
to clairfy
Don't just cherry pick cannon

>> No.29720202

>he was there, it was nice
He thinks it was nice.
>Signs of laxity were everywhere: in the continuing beautification of the cities with mosaics and fountains, in charity towards beggars, in the peace and prosperity of the planet, in regulations for the benevolent conduct of brothels, in the ever-rising standard of cuisine, in the abolition of laws allowing the torture of suspects, even in the pronunciation of the local dialect of Imperial Gothic.
The Imperium is such a great place.

>> No.29720225
File: 12 KB, 251x201, heretek.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Consider for a moment what life would be like as a Heretek of the Dark Mechanicus. You get to work on your own little projects free from the watchful eyes of the AM, and all you need to do to return is keep some of the old tech from the forces of chaos in working order. In all logical sense Chaos could probably have Tau and Nercron weaponry going for it what with all the tech heresy going on in its ranks, but no, those traitor legions evidently just looove their old toys too much.

Kornite DMHs probably spend their time fixing guns that were used as clubs a few too many times. The ones with Nurgle's or Tzeentch's forces probably don't need to do much at all- plans are just as they are, flesh is still disgusting, status quo maintained. As for those working with Slannesh, well, they've probably got it the hardest.

"Hey Heretek, Heretek!"

"I drew these plans for- "

"I don't care how many times you show me, dick missiles will never work."


>> No.29720236
File: 25 KB, 177x188, Garithos_portrait.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

These inhuman dogs must be purged.

We HUMANS have to stick together.

>> No.29720264

Does that inculde undead humans?

>> No.29720302
File: 607 KB, 457x393, 1381385468847.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Part of me wants to say Gray Knight, because what they fundamentally are... they're the most badass. Go out gloriously telling daemons to FUCK OFF and it works for them 75% of the time.

But to be honest, Imperial Guard. I prefer staying human, and if I get lucky and end up in Gaunt's Ghosts I'll stay ali- da fuck am I saying?

PDF fucker. On the most lovely planet out there.

If I must be IG though, stick me on Basilisk duty. Hopefully being mid-tier allows me proper ear-guards. Few years shelling heretics and xenos and I'll be kicking back at my own resort from all the promotions I get from indiscriminately turning a lush jungle into western-front WW1

>> No.29720315


>> No.29720353

Image switch right?

>> No.29720380 [DELETED] 







>> No.29720387

Wrong. Notice how the image is labeled with the proper dimensions (paste it into Paint and you'll see it is 457x393).

Real shitposting.

>> No.29720448 [DELETED] 
File: 290 KB, 1126x1192, 1381385542693.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Your reactions are making my night.

>> No.29720669

Wait, couldn't you just be a rogue trader of lesser reknown, or not from a family that's a thousand years old or something?

I mean, shit, there's people here that justified being inquistors just because they aren't inquisitor LORDS.

>> No.29720736
File: 232 KB, 620x877, 1390020066502.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I'd like to serve in the Admech.

Though I'd want to avoid the most rigid and dogmatic of oversight. Perhaps I'll serve as an explorator, or aboard a rogue trader's vessel if possible.

I will fix the galaxy with SCIENCE.

And make sure my bionics look good. Really, there's no excuse for looking like the bastard offspring of a forklift and a box of tangled christmas lights.

>> No.29720794

>This is Khorne Tech Support
>I see, you have fragments of an Ultramarine skull stuck in your Bolter Receiver?
>I see, can you tell me if you're having any other issues
>What do you mean the magazine won't stay in? I JUST FIXED THAT LAST WEEK
>Every call, every cubicle, every day... Forever.

>> No.29720858

10/10 my sides

>> No.29720982 [DELETED] 

/sp/ pls go

>> No.29721040

Earth cast sounds a lot like what I'll do once I'm done with engineering school.

>> No.29721207


That describes just about everything I would want if I were stuck in 40k.

Go for the Adam Jensen look with the augs.

I would probably never get to the point where I'd want to do the Rite of Pure Thought though, because I like my fleshly desires too much.

>> No.29721595

Orks are the only race that is guaranteed to enjoy their lives in the 40K setting.
Grots don't count.

>> No.29721868
File: 236 KB, 600x1584, Tzeentch_Symbol_by_MeanKitty13.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Chaos under the banner of Tzeentch, of course.

>fucking magic shit everywhere
>mutations fuck yeah, give 'em and receive 'em
>danger of turning into a spawn? who fucking cares

>> No.29721876

What about Chaos cultists? I'm sure they'd have a pretty good time.

>> No.29722183

Minor Rogue Trader. Fuck yeah, flying around in my flying space cathedral, having awesome adventures, fucking my harem of bitches.

>> No.29722212

Inquisition, Ordo Xenos.

>> No.29722284

/d/ark eldar, easy.

>> No.29722300

Orks because they are carefree as fuck.

>> No.29724208

>You know it's funny that this question is never really asked on this board:
Are you sure you didn't mean to type "this question is asked at least once per day"?

>> No.29725315

Mechanicus or Ecclesiarchy.

>> No.29725944
File: 257 KB, 875x1200, A great bargain.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

3 reasons I shouldn't join Chaos?

>> No.29727065
File: 102 KB, 340x496, Adeptus Mechanicus.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Dark Mechanicus of Slaanesh

>Being a creepycool cyborg
>doing mad science
>designing weaponized guitars for Noise Marines
>creating machines to summon the qt-est deamonettes from the Warp

>> No.29727760

Speaking of the FE, are there do they have Gue'vessa in there?

>> No.29728486
File: 483 KB, 500x714, 1390502168547.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Black Templars or IG

>> No.29728713
File: 129 KB, 960x720, 1380099320980.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

thinking newcrons are in any way well written or the concept was even in the vincinity of original or interesting.

12-year-old illiterate confirmed


>> No.29729465

Yes, but considering both her AND the Banshee got knocked up by Warp Magic, they're probably better off going full Heretic...

Yeah, because Raege SO isn't going to fuck you up for that...

Slaanesh's arse, how horrifying!

>Dick Missiles...
Please Anon, OPPAI MISSILES are clearly more Slaaneshi!

Muh Rigger!
Would you summon your qt Daemonette GF into a Tank?

>> No.29729553

No one's mentioned Tau. I'd say Tau. And not Fire Caste either. I'd go Water or Air Caste, civilian, but still with some authority. Oh, and I'd live on a world that's as far as possible away from any and all warfronts.

A comfy life with a comfy wife and a couple of kids with Tau technology to back it up? Hell yeah.

>> No.29730096
File: 121 KB, 540x386, Armorcast_Ork_Great_Gargant.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>clearly more Slaaneshi!

ya'll niggas don't know 'bout orkses.

>> No.29730199
File: 132 KB, 500x400, Tau_Weeaboo.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Por'Ui or Fio'Ui.

>> No.29730286

Any long, hard object can be a phallic stand-in...
...But what about Breasts you can fire from your chest that makes your enemy grow Breasts?
Nothing is more Slaaneshi than rending your enemy little more than a mass of titflesh for groping!

>> No.29730312

Or rather Aun'Ui, considering philosophy studies.

>> No.29730399

>Raege will fuck me up
with what? -4 str?

>> No.29730460
File: 244 KB, 627x866, ss (2014-01-02 at 09.32.56).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Live in ignorance and purchase your happiness when blood and sweat is the real cost
>Thinking ceases, the truth is lost
>Don't you worry, you'll be told exactly what to do.
>I give my people the lives they need. The righteous will succeed.
>The fires of greed will burn the weak, so we'll make freedom obsolete

>> No.29730480

What Sept?

>> No.29730483
File: 2.39 MB, 953x1292, Necrons.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Scaring the shit out of planetary governors everyday.

>> No.29730523

Most awkward dinner party ever.

>> No.29730589
File: 32 KB, 400x292, tauulater.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I'd go as close as I can to easy "civilian" 9-5 doing paperwork or programming, having office shenanigans, and talking back to my witty drone sidekick...

My drone would also include a built in laugh track and puns.

>> No.29730721
File: 35 KB, 589x561, Bao-Dur.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

kinda reminds me

>> No.29730751

whoops meant

though bao dur would be earth caste probably.

>> No.29730900

Raege lifts like a boss, doubly so if this is when she has an Ork Power Klaw...

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