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[ERROR] No.29582485 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Can an Explorator I design for 40K be a sexy and relatively attractive human female despite her machine parts?

Because I kind of want to have my tech and eat dicks too.

>> No.29582513


>> No.29582516

Best-quality cybernetics?

>> No.29582564

Dare to enter my forge world?

>> No.29582569


>> No.29582604

>not shoving dicks into your food intake port
>not being able to commit peristalsis down the full length of the dick
>not touching the foreskin of the dick with your inbuilt food blender

you must be some kind of faggot techpriest

>> No.29582656

Probably only if you're a genetor

>> No.29582708

B-but that's HERESY

>> No.29582754

What? You're saying the melding of man and machine is HERESY?!



>> No.29582932

Word Bearers omnibus. Female explorator, described as being fairly attractive, wearing make-up and having most of her bionics internal.
She's also described as bald, but fuck it, bald women deserve love too.

>> No.29582999

Always when I'm on lunch, so I can't post for more then a few minutes.
I have TONS of hot techpriestesses.

>> No.29583028

You are aware that your picture is Trapguard kissing the Cute Commissar, right?

>> No.29583036

>> No.29583192

It is entirely possible both under RAW for best quality implants and fluff given there is an entire section of the adeptus mechanicus devoted to looking human for the purposes of smoother dealings with the rest of humanity while still being augmented as fuck and properly praising the machine

One being an explorator is far from surprising, especially if they have need of dealing with people to find archeotech, knowledge, trade agreements or anything else that could aid themselves or the mechanicus

>> No.29584215


Problem, tripfriend?

>> No.29584729


Is there a sourcebook that talks more about the part of the Adeptus Mechanicus that tries to look more human>

>> No.29585178

Try The Lathe Worlds supplement for Dark Heresy

>> No.29585394

>implying girls can be cute with machine parts.
shy then rapist mech priest shota\twink a bestie

>> No.29587120

In the books priests/lords of mars, there is a father/daughter techpriest duo, and the daughter is augmented in a way to seem mostly organic, so much so that a rogue trader makes advances towards her.
She is also one of my favorite characters in that series.
Or she was, Fucking Galatea

>> No.29587339

You asked for this.

>> No.29588057

The second is probably Just a case of personal taste. The high quality human looking implants are probably actially available too most mechanicus priests. Most just don't bother because they're probably more expensive and may bee seen as vain (one of those silly emotions).

>> No.29588097

The novel Titanicus also has a bit about the social tech priests.

>> No.29588557

No, the usual aesthetic is simply the easier way. And more marketable to the kiddies and their patents.

>> No.29588671

How come no one's ever drawn the Major like that?

>> No.29588696

>FemJensen x Malik
all my money

>> No.29589238

You can, but the higher you get in the hierarchy of the Mechanicus, the more your insistence on keeping your augmetics non-obtrusive will mark you as rather unusual.

As for examples, Graham McNeill had a character not unlike how you describe in Lords of Mars.

As for in-game...yeah, what the other folks said. You'll have to get best-quality augmetics for the non-obtrusive touch. Expect it to be really expensive.

>> No.29589266

Yeah. No kidding on that one. I'd love to say I didn't see it coming, but its foreshadowing was as huge as the Speranza itself.

>> No.29589518

some of the characters in Titanicus and Mechanicum have those types of augs

>> No.29589628

That depends on your definition of sexy.

>> No.29592018


>sexualizing my Jensen


>> No.29592464

There is also that one female techpriest ciaphas cain fucks for a while in that one book.

>> No.29592523


>Implying he wasnt incredibly sexual to those of the dong-mongling persuasion

Seriously, most girls and gay dudes I know who played HR splooshed all over the place for him.

>> No.29592714

According to Dark Heresy, good quality augments can be made to look just like normal body parts, best quality get covered in bling and shit. Also in the lathe worlds book, they have a techpriest alternate rank focused around being the techpriest's connection to normal people, who all have the least intrusive augments and social skills and crap.

>> No.29593869

>> No.29594280


Yeah, but a Rogue Trader Explorator can get away with being a weirdo.

Until they're heretical and must be killed.

>> No.29594428


drawn how? Isn't that a photo? Are you talking about cosplay?

>> No.29594770

>> No.29596869


>> No.29598305

As in, drawn in parody of Adam Jensen.

>> No.29601331

You mean like this

>> No.29601445

They are. Good and Best quality implants can for the most part be made to look perfectly normal. Sure it'll be fire-resistant 'dragonskin' style materials instead of usual flesh, and you'd be showing quite differently on sensors, but you're fine for face-to-face.

The Mechanicus doesn't generally go for it because they don't WANT to look like normal humans.

The handful that do aren't necessarily heretical but they are non-standard; the 'PR'/recruitment guys keep it looking normal to attract folks, knowing most won't care anymore by the time they get their potentia coil anyways, not that there's anything wrong with wanting to keep your looks if you really do want that, and a Genetor Magos is only still flesh in the most technical of senses, having grown new organic systems with that same definition of organic we're giving carbon nanotube assemblies and the like.

>> No.29601481

I'm pretty sure there's a quote from a Magos in one of the Dark Heresy books to the effect of "Make nothing with your hands that is not useful, beautiful, or deadly." It's something I've kept in mind for a couple of my DH/RT Mechanicus characters.

Picture related; it was my character for a very short-lived Ascension game.

>> No.29601507

Great. Because what I do with my hands is either of those things, depending on who you ask.

>> No.29601547

The lathe worlds book has a carrer path that is exactly what you are looking for, Tech Priests who look and act like normal humans who are used as diplomats.

You can even have shit like massive servo harnesses, integral weapons, huge powerplants and nests of mechadendrites, they simply are modular and can be removed to interact withg people.

>> No.29601613


>> No.29601670


Holy shit, you're still on /tg/.

I got a question for you, somewhat related to the topic at hand, or rather a request for an image. It's a drawrequest that was fulfilled by Technomancer, three years ago now, and I just thought you, of all people, might have it saved in its full size rather than the thumbnail available here:


>> No.29601675

>mfw that gun

>> No.29601708

Do pullpups not exist in your world? What a terrible place that must be.

>> No.29601710

I don't think I saved that one. I'll take a look through my folders, but don't remember having seen it before.

>> No.29601719

That's based on a real gun, moron.

>> No.29601741


God damn it.

I had it before, but I lost it in one HDD wipe, and I asked the artist via his DA if he still had it, but he hasn't responded so far and I doubt he will. It's not on the /tg/ booru either, so /tg/ itself is my only hope though that's not much either.

Anyway, I appreciate the effort.

>> No.29601761

fudd detectored

>> No.29601774

I was going to call him an idiot but you beat me to it.

Trying to figure out which gun it is though. Reminds me of a FAMAS without the empty space.

>> No.29601785

Nah, he didn't say anything about .30-30 or .30-06 or wood or even asking why you'd need a rifle you can't hunt deer with.

>> No.29601803

Most certainly not.

>> No.29601898

What about style? Does the AdMech do sleek implants that meld better with the human form than your standard machinal arm that looks like it was ripped from a tank?

>> No.29601929

They do both. Depends on where you're from. I mean, a Potentia Coil in Dark Heresy is stated to be a representation of anything from a sleek super-high-tech almost-magic power cell to a crude electrical generator hooked up to a small combustion engine.

>> No.29601983

Qbz or somesuch chinaman assault rifle. Or alternatively, a Tavor AR. Or just any generic bullpup.

>> No.29601998

But not the L85A1. Presumably it does not explode into spaghetti every time you try to use it.

>> No.29602033


>> No.29602039

It's not the fact it's a Bullpup, it's the fact that the mechanism is completely misaligned. The ejection port is situated above the barrel and is not aligned with the magazine.
The lack of any sights, a grip and heat shield can be forgiven, but that shit can't be.
So before you call someone a moron, take a second and think if you know shitall or not on the subject at hand. And you faggots obviously don't.

A horrible FAMAS and TAR mix up.

>> No.29602055

Also the ejection port seems to be on the wrong side.

>> No.29602066

>what is caseless

Go back to 5,56 cockmuncher.

>> No.29602121

It's like I'm really on /k/!

>> No.29602161

Of course

>> No.29602163

It's on the wrong everything

Bullshit. Caseless wouldn't be put in banana magz.
And if they are put in the future, what the fuck is that line then? It's obviously not a cocking handle.

>> No.29602202


>> No.29602212

Furthermore, what the fuck is with all those holes in it? Even on the magazine.
And I just noticed, but it looks like it's missing the fucking trigger too

>> No.29602220


>> No.29602246

>The ejection port is situated above the barrel and is not aligned with the magazine.

How do you know that's an ejection port. It doesn't even look like an ejection port; combined with the fact that it's on the left side of the gun tells me it's not an ejection port.

>The lack of any sights

There is clearly some sort of optics device on the front top of the gun.

I'm seriously suspecting that you never heard of bullpup guns before, so you had to quickly Google search it and then enact damage control.

>> No.29602261

I don't think that's the ejection port.

>> No.29602287

Those are rivets or something of the sort most likely.

>> No.29602296

/k/riegers laying down an ass-whuppin' in here.

>> No.29602316

1 ejection port would be on the right side not the left
2 the slot you see is the slot for the charging handle which is on the left side (but no handle is drawn which is a mistake).
3 it has a laser above barrel and in the show they sync with their weapons which have built in range finders. no sights needed.

anime makes allot of mistakes on firearms but this isn't really one of them (save the charging handle not being drawn). You are seeing more wrong than what there really is.

>> No.29602340

If there is one thing shirow knows, it's his guns. True, this pic isn't by him, but at least the person who drew it isn't a complete ignoramus.

>> No.29602403

reminds me of a bullpup stg-44 because of the handle

>> No.29602413

>Anons don't think ejection ports can be on the left side of firearms

>> No.29602431

Look up some damn ergonomics, jackass. Ejection port on the left means casings are going to be ejected right into your arm, if the weapons is being used properly.

>> No.29602433

They aren't on right handed guns.

>> No.29602444


>> No.29602447

More like your face.


>> No.29602449


Yes. First, its your fucking character, so fuck everyone else's opinions. Just claim your character is a special diplomat whose enhancements are designed to not freak those meat bags out or anything.

>> No.29602468

Which is, as was stated earlier in the thread, Cannonical. Lathe worlds even has an alternate career path for DH techpriests to be like that.

>> No.29602575

Because it lacks the cocking handle. And ejection ports can be on the left side. The bullets can be kicked out forward for instance.
And it lacks any sights. That dot can be anything.
My country uses a bullpup rifle as it's official assault rifle, just so you know.

Possibly on the gun yes. Altough it seems counter productive to slap so much rivets on a gun designed to be as light weight as possible. Still doesn't explain why they are in the middle of the mag though.

1. again not necesarily
2. in both cases it's a mistake
3.anime logic lol

I love it how weaboo faggots get all worked over when you insult their shit

>> No.29602658

I actually laugh at how people are overanalysing the gun, when the perspective on it is warped anyway.

as to the right left ejection part - maybe she pilfered a the gun from a lefthanded person.

>> No.29602712


>And ejection ports can be on the left side.

Yes, in left handed guns.

>And it lacks any sights.
>That dot can be anything.

It could be a sight.

If we're going to accept that ejection ports can be on the left side, we should also be able to accept that dot is a sight.

>3.anime logic lol

I don't know what you're trying to imply here, but I currently have the capabilities to add a bore-sighted laser range finder and CCD with magnification optics on my gun. It's not impossible.

>> No.29602742

>cliche weeaboo hate
>can't even spell weeaboo

Just let it go, anon.

>> No.29602758

>The ejection port is situated above the barrel and is not aligned with the magazine.

Assuming that it's an ejection port to begin with. There's also a thing called forward-ejection, where the brass is inserted into a tube through which they're pushed out of the gun, usually somewhere at the front of the weapon. The gun could have a similar system, except the tube opens up before the end, allowing casings to drop to the side.

>The lack of any sights

That's assuming the block at the front doesn't contain a built in sight and flip-up iron sights.

>"That dot can be anything."
>"again not necesarily"
>it's not clear, so I assume I'm right and everyone else is wrong

Top marks, hot-shot.

>anime logic lol

Right, camera sight hooked to goggles is so animu. Remember when Robocop-san just pulled accurate hits from the hip in all directions without aiming one bit? So kawaii!

>> No.29602773 [DELETED] 

>> No.29602829



>> No.29602846

>> No.29602859

Are those Mechanicus-approved implants?

>> No.29602904

>he thinks everyone on Earth is right-handed
>he also thinks firearms can't be custom-made for southpaws


>> No.29602939

Firearms actually aren't custom made these days, but have conversion parts or sometimes the bits are flippable

>> No.29602951

I'll flip your bits, m8

>> No.29602967

Your wish is my command.

>> No.29603004

I was happier before i noticed her left leg is oddly aligned.

>> No.29603027

Am I the only one to notice the padlock on the panties?

>> No.29603046

Of course you can. good quality bionics can look alike the replaced parts, and best quality one can be jewels of craftsmanship in precious materials, so...
> pic related. Augmenticist Rogue Trader. the only visible artificial thing on her is the fact she has no longer any hair, thus use wigs and false eyebrows.

>> No.29603052

Purpose of moustaches: finally discovered.

>> No.29603075

I too noticed it, and lament its presence

>> No.29603100

It's not like that would actually do anything to keep them on
Unless it's more of a symbolic thing to say "This Warp Gate belongs to The Emperor."

>> No.29603112

What the hell was she thinking when she put on those earrings?

>> No.29603123

>implying that isn't a trap

>> No.29603126

"These don't match my eyes or outfit at all, but they were a gift from the captain so I'll wear them today to keep him happy and so I can chastise him if he doesn't notice that I'm wearing them."

>> No.29603153

I want to fug a hot, practically entirely robotic gurl with a short white wig.
what's she called?

>> No.29603166


>> No.29603222

If she has to impress anyone, that one's either, a major noble, governor, inquisitor or admiral.
I don't see either of those positions really handing out earrings to her kind.
Especially not ones that don't match with the uniform at all.

Which leaves only one reason to want those terrible things around. They're digital weapons or some other invaluable piece of equipment, like a teleport homer.

>> No.29603254

Fuck that noise, Warp travel is allready dangerous enough.

>> No.29603289

She is not.
force-field generator in one of the earing, the second one is a matching gemstone. A wedding gift as well.
Lonallyn Victrix IV Anastasia Von Razgriz, 256th Bearer of the Razgriz Warrant of Trade. As for dickings, she is married, mother of twins, and currently too busy doing Miracles in His Name, making the Koronus Expanses the Koronus Sector, and right now rampaging inside the Nexus of Shadows with a Rhino as an improvised flail to think of this.
Do you want lewd picts ? vox-picts ? The Seneschal already got your need covered. Adult section of the Razgriz gift shop. Retails in Footfall, Port Wander, Damaris, Scintilla, Sinophia.

>> No.29603311

Alternatively - she has no actual taste. Or earing styles like this are all the rage

>> No.29603325

yes pls
I might actually draw some porn of her

>> No.29603326

This doesn't shock me at all. He's so brooding.

I'm sarcastic and brooding and miserable, too, but I don't have sunglasses built in to my head, so it doesn't do me any good.

>> No.29603334

I cannot possibly be the only one who thinks he looks a bit like Gordon Freeman.

>> No.29603347

Excellent taste, anon. Excellent taste.

>> No.29603392

He has a goatee and glasses. That's it.

>> No.29603395

They are still horrible.
All lewdness available is appreciated.

>> No.29603414

"I'm a fucking Rogue Trader. Let's see who's got the balls to criticize me so I can have a competent First Mate."

>> No.29603453

Its a really common face among nerd heroes/nerds in general. Dark hair that's spiky or just cut short because they don't care, beard/goatee, sharp features that aren't classically uber-handsome and technically look slightly villainous. Its as cool as a nerd can hope to look while still being a nerd and not selling out to the mainstream, or whatever.

At this point, Gordon Freeman is the Nickolas Cage of video games; everyone looks like gordon freeman. House and Walter White have both been mocked up in HEV suits.

>> No.29603482

That's the sort of thing you say if you want to get killed by her, or her flock of cherubs, or the forty-man marching band always following her around...
>the true reason in fact : just that the guy I asked for colorizing the portrait was uninspired for
both jewels, and I considered that detail minor.
go forth. I don't care.
If you really do, don't forget to share.

>> No.29603537

So you want a impulsive and rude aesthete for a first mate?
Someone who would publicly speak out against you based on your dress?
She'll have to appoint that hair dresser, I guess.

Heh. Me too. Glasses, beard.
I was even accused of looking like a politician and a specific insuffrable pathologist..

>> No.29603645

>those eyes
she looks stoned

>> No.29603658

Funny, that's almost exactly how I pictured Neith. I mean Weaver disguised as a human.

>> No.29603660

Gordon Freeman was kind of supposed to be an Everyman hero (well, an everyman for 90s video game players, who were all intelligent white males, or thought they were); like Diehard, but with more Science.

Inside Freeman's Mind actually still maintains that; his profoundly selfish and neurotic internal dialog might be uncomfortably familiar, and he LOVES overthinking an absurd idea and treating it as a puzzle; that defines so many of us and our arguments.

What I've always wanted to see, after playing The Last Of Us, is that first crowbar kill (the metrocops in the tunnel with the dead guy and the woman being arrested), but done with full desperate rage, Last Of Us style. You've been shoved around and chased and shot at all day by fascist thugs. Now you have a crowbar and a bulletproof suit.

Oh, and now a gun, too! This day might have started crappy, but it just keeps getting better, Met hot blasian chick, got suit back, slaked my bloodthirst...

>> No.29603786

>reference sheet
you mean you commissioned those two pictures above of your special snowflake instead of paying for something that would look better?

>> No.29603932

Anyone got any pics of decent looking voidborn? Having a hard time trying to picture them.

>> No.29603960

let me tell how she chose her husband.
note : I'm French. My English might be broken. Deals with it.

>team on Scintilla, on their way from Sinophia where the flagship was stored on top of a ruined hive to the Expanse.
> the RT is the last of her lineage.
> Said lineage just got back the Warrant of trade after one millenia worth of inheritance trials.
> wants to get married and to sir an heir ASAP before going to the Expanse.
> contact the Famulous.
> got a bunch of potential husbands, all of lower station than her.
>gather them all on her ship so they try to woo her.
> wealthy merchants, princes, high command officers, chartist captains... and a Munitorium officer from an obscure data-citadel from Prol IX.
> all of them brought gifts : implants, exotic pets, including those ugly earings.
> this guy came in in his everyday robe, armed with his standard Munitorium pattern shotgun, with a flower bouquet and a data slate.
> his gift ? the data slate and the bouquet.
> On the data slate, 1 profit factor worth of taxe refunds, "losses" recovered, and stolen goods by the corrupt official in charge of the dynasty goods during the trials.
> Inside the bouquet, a jar with the pickled head of said corrupted administrator.
>that's how "Munitorium adept with Shotgun" became her spouse.

pic related : that's him.

>> No.29603962

A pale skinny person with minimal body hair? What's so hard to picture?

Everyone in 40K looks like they don't get enough sun; just think of someone naturally olive-skinned who never goes outside, so they come off a greyish.

>> No.29603988

they basically look like eldars but less pretty, or dark eldars but less edgy

>> No.29604008

She is.

On life.

>> No.29604058

But at that point Freeman was already a hardened killer who'd been put on ice by powers we can not comprehend because of his insane talent for killing.

He put down that metro cop like you swat at a fly. Post-Half Life Gordon Freeman isn't the everyman scientist hero, he's a grizzled veteran who'd be suffering from PTSS if he actually had a real world to return to. But there is no real world anymore, not even one he tragically can't be a part of. He'll keep wading kneedeep through the remains of the armies that are sent against him until he can just sit quietly in the rubble and have the five minutes he needs to remember that he misses normal shit, like having to ask the dude in the other stall for some extra toilet paper. Until then, killing is as easy as breathing.

>> No.29604086

I got it done from the guy who has done most of the Deathwatch illustrations.
I like the end result. You don't. That's fine.

>special snowflake
A high powered character among high powered other powered characters in a high powered game ?

>> No.29604111

But she's practically dead.

>> No.29604138

I also like the result, but you could have asked something better from one of the very few FFG illustrators who isn't a hack.
I said special snowflake because obviously you care more about it than about the numerous cooler-looking things 40k is filled with. Maybe I should have just said waifu.

>> No.29604206


Un français qui a créé sa waifu Libre-Marchande sur /tg/

hue hue hue

>> No.29604234

c'est quoi la blague?
c'est sensé avoir un rapport avec les sistas?

>> No.29604258


French surrender mon-keighs, pls go.

>> No.29604261

>That seemingly fleshy face.
>Those unoptimized hands.
>Those puny mechadendrites.
Mars above, she probably only has two legs, too!


>> No.29604275

It's almost like I'm on /ic/

>> No.29604282

Fair point. It's more like I tend to be very nitpicky on how my characters should like, and she's my favorite.

My Waifu is the battlecruiser by the way.

>> No.29604285

Va d'abord sucer un million de bites et on considèrera ton offre.

>> No.29604306

But I didn't mention Loomis or comment on how anime-inspired it looked.

>> No.29604345


No, you cheese-cunt of a frog-fucking dilly-daddle arsewipe. Do what your genes compel you to. I bet you carry spare white underwear so you can just hoist it up on a stick whenever a fight ensues.

>> No.29604390


>> No.29604450

Actually, the firearms in GITS are well researched and well drawn, if you're a gun guy, you'd probably like the stand alone complex series

the artist of that one picture is just a fucking retard

>> No.29604457


Aucune, je trouve ça juste marrant de trouver d'autres FR sur /tg/ mec, relax


Let's not turn this into an /ic/, /k/, /v/ or /pol/ thread please. I'll just keep posting 40k cuties

>> No.29604473

wait shit, I'm on /tg/?

>> No.29604489


get out of here russel, go back to /a/

>> No.29604499



>> No.29604542

If I had to spend 10 000+ years plugged to a golden throne on life-support I wouldn't mind her on my lap for a few of those years.

>> No.29604642

>> No.29604655

Does anyone have some Cuddles stuff?
She turns me on for some reason. I wanna cuddle her on the couch and brush her hair.

>> No.29604679


> cuddle her on the couch and brush her hair.

You sick fuck, there's +18 boards for that kind of shit

>> No.29604910

At least he's not holding her by her dick.

>> No.29604958



>> No.29605315


>> No.29605330

>> No.29605342

>> No.29605359

>> No.29605385

>> No.29605401

>> No.29605412

>> No.29605431

That's all I've got.

>> No.29605435

>a lady in that gaudy 18thcentury-esque uniform

excuse me while I go change my pants

>> No.29605496

>Because I kind of want to have my tech and eat dicks too.
I like you OP.

>> No.29605534

Since it's not motivated by a desire to make an interesting character, no.

>> No.29605606

Thank you, based DF. Now I can fap, sleep and hopefully die a happy man.

>> No.29605629


I bet you don't even fap to the characters you create, you normalfaggot

>> No.29605644

Look at the way it pinches the fabric and where it's situated. This thing is piercing her clitories so you'd actually rip out part of her vag trying to take it off.

>> No.29605673

itt ASFR

>> No.29605680

>this thread

Dammit /tg/, If I wanted to get horny I would have gone to /d/.

>> No.29605805


>> No.29605818

I'm sorry lads. Seems like that the special private exchange I got between the RT and her Master of Ordnance - a Vostroyan PDF officer from the 69th Artillery gone mercenary- is lost. I dunno if some lewd in French would have pleased you. oh well...

>> No.29605982


>> No.29606074


That japanese female ain't attractive brah

>> No.29606127

True shit nigga. Gimme a nice, warm, muscular Vostroyan to huddle in an Ushanka with, any day.

>> No.29606219


True dat, but every human girl is a gift from the Emperor

>> No.29606268

What about a Commissar? 100% Schola grown human.

>> No.29606311

Especially redheads.

>> No.29606322

>Those ears and xenos features
>100% Human

I'm not falling for your heresy bait TG

>> No.29606332


I'm not sure that commissar is human. You wouldn't lie to the Emperor, now, matey?

>> No.29606369

I don't envy the person who has to use that rifle. Fuck me, that looks awful.
These allegations and dubs are quite hurtful. I'll have you know that, despite the sexual tendencies, casual sadomasochism and nudity, and inability to pray without laughing that may indicate otherwise, Commissar Dra'zail is a human through and through.

>> No.29606386


This sounds 100% legit. Let's trust that guy.

>> No.29606425


Is that Marcia?

>> No.29606437


Why, yes, I agree. Now, let's fight heresy together my friends

>> No.29606443

That's a great little story.

Nothing turns a RT on like profit Factpr

>> No.29606456

How the hell do her finger-guns even work? Wouldn't it make more sense to have a single barrel in her palm instead?

>> No.29606509 [SPOILER] 

Huzzah! Super-Best-Not-Xenos-Friends, Assemble!
>"Madam, I can bring a woman to orgasm using only my little toe. I will show you pleasure beyond imagining."
>"Hmm, that's a bit overdone. And you, young Adept? What can you do."
>"Every tax system and its loopholes from here to Segmentum Solar"
>"I have quite literally never been this moist. We need children. Now."

>> No.29606513

>The lack of any sights
You do realize that she is a full-bodied cyborg and that her gun links directly with her brain, right? She doesn't need sights because she sees a crosshair on her fucking retinas. They had a whole episode about that.

>> No.29606574

>> No.29608025

Almost like that. there was a raid happening at that momenton board with Slaughts, two starships hijacked by pirates, and some Inquisitorial Hijincks, but the intent was there.

A word concerning the children : they are now three year old, and have already captured a cruiser. Alone, with 2 cherubs and bluff. Shall I tell the story on how, if people are interessted ?

>> No.29608097


That ship is very ... Fabulous

>> No.29608212


/tg/ always wants storys.

>> No.29608221

3 year olds taking over a cruiser? Do tell

Reminds me of the Blood Gorgons book, where one of the most guarded prisoners is a 5 year old psyker who calls himself Death.
Let's just say his name is quite fitting

>> No.29608561

If you aren't trying to make your ship the gaudiest thing in Imperial space, then you're playing Rogue Trader wrong.

>> No.29608637


Make sense, I guess

>> No.29608696

it's a long ladder to climb

>> No.29609086

Gilded Hull, best quality Ostentatious Display of Wealth and Vaulted Ceilings, etc... Nicknammed "His Majesty" by the crew. Yes, the ship is a He.

Anyway, story time ! Again, sorry for the broken english.

>First twin : Castor Gilgamesh VI Romulus
>Second one : Miles Enkidu II Tyrion.
> both are tenfold worse then Denis the Menace.
>born from an artificial womb
> Mom RT is in a Ressuriatrix Chamber.
> in the RT family, children are knwon to be... difficult.
>when they started to walk, each PC and bridge officer carved a I NEED THIS MUCH recaf cup in a Earthshacker shell. Direly needed.
>pranksters, tenfold worse then Dennis the Menace.
> the ship is currently in orbit above Quppa Psi XII under colonisation.
>Lord Admiral bastille the Seventh with his flotilla warp jumped and threaten the whole system.


>> No.29609247

>when they started to walk, each PC and bridge officer carved a I NEED THIS MUCH recaf cup in a Earthshacker shell. Direly needed.
What? Do you mean they converted an Earthshaker round into a coffee cup each?

>> No.29609405

He's translating, but I think he's saying they need an Earthshaker shell full of recaf due to needing to deal with the children, running about and being havoc

>> No.29609435

(by the way, both twins are PC)

>One of the PCs, Hereticus Interrogator, wants to dissuade Bastille to attack, and get allowed to come on board alone with a single smallcraft.
>the two children sneak inside the craft in a crate, after pillaging their mom coffer of arms, including her thunder hammer and her weaponised bicorn.
> two of the RT cherubs are with them, as usual.
> while the Interrogator is escorted to the bridge, the twins and cherubs infiltrate the COLOSSUS.
> managed to sneak into the bridge, thanks to being so small, and being able to be swooped in by the cherubs.
> saw Bastille and the Interrogator having words.
> they saw Bastille Lord Captain Baton in his hand.
>among the thing they have stolen from mom, a grapnel.
> they stole the freacking baton with it, and run away.
> tried to use the baton at the nearest cogitator.
>fight together to know who willuse it and how.
>create mayhem by disconnecting this way the gravity plates inside the cruiser bridge at random.
> Miles, with the oversized hat of his mom, shoot Bastille to death with the laser hidden in it meanwhile.
>Bastille armsmen arrives...
> following dialog ensues.

>> No.29609916

yes. get the explosives out, add an handle, get an oversized cup.
And I'm translating and typing, thus I'm a bit slow.

>Armsmen : "DROP YOUR WEAPONS AND SURRENDER !" ( after all, valuable hostages).
>Miles : "NO, YOU'd better surrender.
>Castor : "Oh yes. because Uncle Novus [the Interrogator] got angry because of you.
> "And because Aunt Aleksia [the Master of Ordnance, knwon with her 30 kill ship-tally] gonna kick your butt with macro-lead.
> And Mum gonna wake up and be reaaaalllyy angry at you.
> And besides, we have hidden viral bombs all accross your ship.
> If you don't obey us, they blew up !
> We do not care, we are inu.. immu ... we will not fall sick!
> Oh yeah, but YOU will ! You'll have a lot of poxes and cotties and you'll vomit and got fevers !
> And we will put you in bed with suppositories and very bad soup to drink.
An explosion get heard at this moment, shacking a bit the ship.
The thing is, they were not playing pranks just for fun.
But in order to learn how to go full" Home Alone" against boarders.
And that they have, for shit and giggles, played a bit on their way to the bridge.
> You were think we were lying, weren't you ?
> Of course they were ! But You heard that !
> We only put your ship on fire to begin with.
> You'd better surrender."
And on that, they surrendered.

And that's how they manage to capture a cruiser

>> No.29610629

My ship cheats. Chameleon cloaking device, for when I need to look like a deadly pirate, or a realativly well off minor rogue trader. Good old dark elder tech.

>> No.29614117

The regular guns use back-up iron sights in case the smartlink fails.

>> No.29615240

Zut alors. My French could use the practice.

>> No.29615265

Are you new? Blackheart is a shameless cockfiend, I doubt he has a problem.

>> No.29615303

Jensen is implied to be sexually impotent and/or disfigured.

>> No.29615899


Yeah, I was thinking of the guy from Emperor's gift when I wrote that, but w/e. Alternatively you're an 'eccentric' Magos, which is why you were quietly shuffled off to the entourage of a Rogue Trader.

>> No.29616164

Is that a space marine on the bridge, or just a statue of a space marine on the bridge? And is that a lightsaber?

>> No.29619790

bump for robot girls

>> No.29623715

It is a chryselephantine statue of the God-Emperor, with his flaming sword. about 100 meters high.
I told you, we have pimped our flagship to the max.

>pic related : how the PC travels on board, on their own gold plated armoured steam train, with a special track on the very hull in order to show off the ship to visistors.

>> No.29624516

I'll build sunglasses into your head, m8

>> No.29627638

>Jensen is implied to be sexually impotent and/or disfigured.
How is it implied?

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