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[ERROR] No.25892487 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

As a GM, have you ever done something purposefully odd to your PCs, such as random transformations, sudden political dickery, or even weirder things? Let's hear your stories.

>> No.25892532

Don't we already have a stealth fetish thread in gaming thread going?

>> No.25892600

This is more intended as a sort of thread for stories about you being an ass to your PCs for no reason. Stealth fetishes are probably just coincidentally related, as they certainly weren't my entire intention, even if I meant them o be discussed peripherally (see OP pic)

>> No.25892955

Rolled 1, 2, 1, 1, 3 = 8

I've given my old group a love potion once. It was the only save made in the game.

>> No.25892980

I once gave my players a deck of many things.

I have learned my lesson, given two retired as rich nobility and the other two ended up completely beyond dead, so we had to scrap the campaign.

>> No.25893222

I once had a warforged artificer who thought it'd be funny to roll a sense motive check on an old temple, cus he wanted to be a smart ass. He rolled his highest, and then I told him that he trusted these ruins so much that he never wanted to leave. So inevitably when the party had to leave the place his character went into a deep state of despair that caused some negligible minuses to stats he didn't use, but since my players hate having any sort of debuff, he decided he was going to stay right there and send homunculi out to adventure with his party. The game broke due to RL reasons.

>> No.25893419

That is either a very very sad case of.... stat obsession I guess. Or an awesome case of roleplaying.

>> No.25893452

Mind if a slip my sword in your armors gaps? if you know what I mean.

>> No.25893453

It was the first time they seriously roleplayed in depth. Theyve gotten better as time has gone by but they used to be terrible roleplayers.

>> No.25893948

I had my group once in a sleep state where they found themselves in a field of grey grass.

The grass where actually eyelashes, which all parted, showing several different eyes, in all shapes and sizes, and causing the ground under their feat to change to a strange, fleshy texture that rooted them to the "ground".

The field then changed and turned in a giant shaft, with them "sliding" to the bottom, where from the fleshy substance a sketetal form emerged, eyes forming, popping open, closing and dissapearing on it's "skin". It's "head" was covered with a cloth, which depicted all kinds of crayon-drawn eyes, with one largely dominant.

>> No.25894054


It talked in different voices, some sweet, some rasping, some loud, some soft, some small.

It claimed itself the Collector of Eyes, who claimed the "right" eye from the dead, and with it, their memories.

that's the jist of it. After that, some shenanigans happened and the campaign died.

But the Collector did not.

>> No.25895277

Story time?

>> No.25895471

I gave my players a portal that kept spewing salt, just to fuck around with them as the salt elementals dried up all their water and honestly I wanted them to see struggle with resources for once (the thing was several days into the desert).

They bastards created a business empire out of it.

I never again saw my original campaign.

On the good side, all that unused campaign material has helped me greatly reduce preptime afterward!

>> No.25895517

You never finished the story if I recall.

Link to those who dont know

>> No.25895569


But I did, my man. That one you linked has the full story I posted in late 2012 (some months after the campaign was finished).

Some time ago I uploaded an easier to read (and with slighly less spelling errors) to 1d4chan if you'd like the full transcript: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Tale_of_an_Industrious_Rogue,_Part_I

Worst part? We recently finished the campaign we started after that one, and the next one (set to start in August) will take care in Planescape... and the party wants to start with a business venture from the beggining.

>> No.25895599

The BBEG of my campaign cursed all the PCs with a gender change spell.

The were all men paying women, who now had to play as men playing women, turned into men.

>> No.25895671

>and the party wants to start with a business venture from the beggining.
Then this is your hook. The bbeg is head of a rival business ruthlessly outcompeting them, if they're prone to hold grudges a thief lifts their best/most valuable merch, etc.
If they start with a business, they can't expect you to not fuck with it for the plot, now can they?
I almost want to run a game like this now. Well, prepping for a rogue trader campaig anyways, so basically the same idea anyways.

>> No.25895718


I don't know really where to begin, but I'll try.

It begins with a birth.

A birth of two, a birth of twins. One was noble, righteous and spoke no lie, and the Light of truth streamed forth from it's heart.

The other was a thing of guile, dublicious and self-serving, and Darkness enveloped it like a cloak.

Althought so radically different, both loved each other dearly, and would often fight, but never to kill.

For beigns like these, endless eternity does become boring after a time.

And so,

Their grand Game began.

>> No.25895793

Yeah, recently actually. My DM enforced some bullshit that made me re-roll my stats and now I'm pretty irrelevant. We're level 5 and up until now I've been a Sorcerer, but now that I can't cast anything beyond level 1 spells I'm not sure where to go from here.

New stats:
str 14
dex 16
con 14
int 16
wis 12
cha 11

>> No.25895847


Yeah, they pretty much gave me the hooks in a silver platter.

Since we're aiming for a more modular campaign (one which we can play in short 2-3 session plots, as we don't get to play as often as we previously did, and long-winded campaigns are harder to keep running that way), they decided that having an organization run by them from the very start would be the ideal setup, and I agreed.

The campaign starts just after they have formed this thing, which is essentially "Adventurers Incorporated: We Take Care of Your Nasty Shit", with their HQs set in Sigil and open for the most bewildering requests, for a generous fee, of course.

Everyone, myself included, was pretty pumped with the whole business venture in our Katapesh campaign, but due to the way things ended it was impossible to continue. So this will give them a fresh start, and perhaps this time they'll be more careful about golems and the Negative Plane (though I doubt it).

I absolutely intend to have them visit what was left of Saltspit, and maybe meet with what became of Hassan. It's Planescape, after all.

>> No.25895897

God I am so down for this

>> No.25895946


>> No.25896039

One time my group of adventurers were sent to guard a Queen from being possessed by an evil and perverted spirit at a gala.

Prior to that session, I made sure that I had a one-on-one conversation to each member of the group and made sure that they wouldn't speak about what I talked to them about (it was mostly about innocent things, and to instill distrust).

Let's just say that everyone began accusing everyone else of being possessed while the spirit was getting closer to the Queen.

>> No.25896084


The first to play was Darkness, who shrouded all that is in it's cloak.

Light countered by piercing it several times with it's sword, which formed the stars.

Darkness did like this, and for only once, twin fought twin.

Light was a mighty warrior, but Darkness was not. Hiding in it's shredded cloak, Darkness hid from it's twin, stabbing in the gaps of it's armour, and beign all out annoying about it.

Light, fuming with rage, struck at it's dark twin with a searing sword, which cut out it's good eye. In turn, Darkness slided a dagger of shadow between it's brighter twin's ribs.

Both backed away, blood streaming from their wounds.

>> No.25896322


Nobody probably cares, but I'm finishing this (didn't write this in full before)

The blood of creation intermingled, and formed something else, something more;

The 7 Realms.

As light and darkness looked down upon the newly formed realms, forming the first Eclipse, they laughed.

They laughed until tears ran from their eyes, beams of pure light and deepest dark, which filled the realms with Oceans and Rivers and Lakes.

>> No.25896432

See if your DM allows retraining. Your stats would be excellent if you were, say, a wizard or rogue.

>> No.25896980

>My DM enforced some bullshit that made me re-roll my stats and now I'm pretty irrelevant.
That is seriously hardcore bullshit.

>> No.25897119

Sicked a cleaning servitor on the illiterate Krieg Guardsman in my group after he rolled an untrained tech-use test to turn it on so it could clean up some blood before a security team showed up.

Five degrees of failure later the servitor attacks him thinking the guardsman is a walking mess and rolls fury. I don't normally allow fury for minor NPCs, but I made an exception and allowed the rage of the great clean one to manifest in this servitor's power mop. The guardsman had never been wounded once before and suddenly he gets crit wounded by a servitor wielding a blessed powermop.

A couple of grapple turns later and the servitor has been destroyed by him and the rest of the party , creating a bigger mess and getting the party deeper in trouble with the law. Not to mention invoking the party techpriests' ire.

>> No.25897166

I once opened a one-shot with gender-bending. It's not my fetish, but everyone felt like it was weird and I'll never do it again.

>> No.25897208

>be GM
>hot female player rejects advances
>respect it and be OK with it
>said female player decides she wants to have a prostitute for a character
>instantly decide that it's time to fuck with her
>said prostitute character goes to a bathhouse
>gets filled in every hole
>her boyfriend is there
>is the only one who didn't get a hole to fuck
>laugh harder
>prostitute doesn't get paid
>the only person mad at GM is the boyfriend

>> No.25897241

How many other players are there? That shit sounds awkward.

>> No.25897272

I was running a game set in a pseudo-cyberpunk alternate near future and for some reason my players completely forgot that I was running it in the same universe as the last two games where it turned out beyond just future tech there was also magic and psionics and shit that the Illuminati is trying to hide. Then they ended up in the Hollow Earth and it was hilarious. They thought they were going to be fighting ChiCom commandos in the Antarctic.

>> No.25897290

>dare you step into my magical forest
Dude, christ

Part of me doesn't even want to go to Gen-Con. Its going to be full of people like you, sweaty fat grognards who make sexual advances at anything they think might be physically compatible.

>> No.25897319

The funny part is we hooked up a few months afterwards, and she later admitted to enjoying herself during the session.

>> No.25897357

How the hell do you even run a campaign based on fetishes? Like, does one guy always sit there with his hand under the table or something?

>> No.25897366

My group was beeing harassed by a bard. He followed them around, singing about what they do during that moment or what they are up to.

He wasn't always there. He just popped up at the most inconvenient moments (sneaking, information gathering, ect).

They got rid of him eventually. By showing him another group of young adventurers.

>> No.25897380

I would say I hit them with seemingly random political dickery as well, but that's par for the course. My games inevitably rail off into them buying out towns and then getting in trouble with the fuzz and talking their way out. My players are kind of weird. I think in reality it is sudden large bouts of combat and action oriented gaming that would weird them out, it's all intrigue all the time here. Or the horror. The horror comes out of left field sometimes.

>> No.25897402

Both hands.

>> No.25897436

>have you ever done something purposefully odd to your PCs
that's actually the theme of my campaign.

>> No.25897446

Have your guy realize how useless he is and retire in order to save himself from a meaningless death. That or make him die a meaningless death.

>> No.25897470

We play oWoD mage.
The rules say I HAVE to fuck with my players with paradox.
Once, the paradox spirits caused a guy to stub his toe when ever he took three steps. For six hours.

God forbid they take dark fate. That's like asking the rocks to fall.

>> No.25897555

I love this.

>> No.25897692

Alright. I'm not sure if any of these actually count, but I'll bite.

- As a prank, and to sort of punish them for greedily grabbing everything of value they felt they could get away with, I rolled up some cursed items for a dungeon encounter. They only found one, but took the bait - they'd no sooner seen the belt than the berserker had put it on, whereapon it changed him into a woman and bound itself. He loved it, and I was horrified.

- I gave my players a primary school level puzzle the other day. It was cruel of me, since they're complete idiots who can summon creativity during fights, but in no other situations (eg. they skullfucked a gigantic dragon so hard that it was paralysed and broke its neck gliding into a mountain). A simple sequential Lights On puzzle. It took them THREE HOURS TO SOLVE.

- It was particularly cruel considering the fact that, the last time I was mean enough to put an obstacle in front of them that required prudence to pass, one of the players showed what could easily be interpreted as suicidal tendencies, but was genuinely shocked by the negative outcome - specifically, a forest path beset with traps. He declared that he wanted to run forward, and due to a very lucky roll, avoided being pounded by two wooden logs swinging into each other; he declared that he would run forward again, and due to a very lucky roll, avoided being impaled on the sewage-covered spikes of the pit he fell into; he declared that he would run forward AGAIN, and due to an only slightly lucky roll, only lost his right arm and left leg to the crushing log trap. All whilst wearing this stupid grin, which didn't go away when, ten minutes after getting pulled out of the trap, he FINALLY reacts to his injuries with a mild "What?".

One more coming.

>> No.25897707


Any GM who doesn't let the party roll Intelligence is a bad GM.

>> No.25897718

- Probably the most dickish - my Warforged player was getting complacent, so I sent a puzzle monster at him. It would corrode any metallic substance - including magical - into brown dust on contact, which would instantly dissipate into a harmless cloud of nothing. It was also near to (but not actually) immortal, being about as hard to kill as other amorphous creatures in the setting, like elementals (electricity-based attacks would've kicked its arse, but the party never bothered despite having access to them).

The important piece of the puzzle? It never left the area, and was slow enough to move around.

The result? The smart Warforged player kept his distance and wandered on to the next town with the other smart player, the Dwarf. Oh, and the Demon, despite seeing it eat magical metal like it was nothing, decided to slash at it with his sword. The entire party begged him not to, but he wouldn't listen; taking pity on his stupidity, I fudged the roll so that it only reduced his sword to dagger-length instead of destroying all of it. He then told me how he committed suicide by plunging it into his throat, again to the party's concern - when asked why, he looked at me and said "Because you broke my sword."

I'm not sure I really have it in me to be particularly dickish. Despite my players.

>> No.25897724

>He declared that he wanted to run forward,


>> No.25897725

Rolled 37




>> No.25897788


What possible explanation could he give to force mental stat rerolls? The idea is absurd.

>> No.25897815


No anon, you are the grognard.

>> No.25897838

i had a player assassinate another player's father, unknowingly.
when I revealed to the player that his father had been murdered in his sleep, the look of shock on our rogue was amazing.
10/10 storyline

>> No.25897878

Think what you like - puzzles were thematically appropriate for the temple they were in, and it was such a simple puzzle oh my god.

My mistake in that post - it's known as Lights Out, not Lights On. A version of it can be found here.


Now, imagine a version of that where there are four circles in a row. Four circles. In a row. Just four. Four.

They never asked to try and find more information. Never considered looking around the rooms more than the basic, non-perception based description of the area they were in.

They just ran between the rooms, pulled the light switches, and smacked the shadows which would occasionally appear from the dark rooms.

Ran and pulled. Ran and pulled.

It became a game to try catching their fellows in dark rooms where the weak shadows would appear.

Then, in the beginning of the third hour, they began to get anxious. They wondered why there were lights that could be turned on and off, why they toggled the lights in the connected room(s). Despite being told by an NPC beforehand that puzzles were in this temple, I'm convinced that they didn't know that it was a puzzle.

They solved it by accident.

>> No.25898571

Cursed artifact helmet. I put it on and I was transformed. I'm kind of upset about it, but I'm not gonna be disruptive because it's otherwise a very good game.
It's worth a shot. I don't really want to be either one of those classes, but it's better than being useless.

>> No.25898945


A cursed polymorph effect that alters your mind and body, turning you into a completely different person... but not your learned skills and abilities?

That's just silly.

>> No.25899076


The helmet could just be affecting his prowess without taking away his training; the fact his ability modifiers went down would account for his less apt capacity to actually use that training.

Still a dick move, but it can make sense.

>> No.25899140

Is it possibly a bicycle helmet, perhaps?

>> No.25899171


Make it one of those pointed Dunce Hats for extra dickness.

>> No.25899196

I was thinking more like a tard-helm that actually causes retardation instead of just protecting one.

>> No.25899318

To be fair, I'm actually more intelligent than I was before, just far less charismatic. Helm of Social Awkwardness?

>> No.25899342

That sounds like a helm of autism, actually.
Impaired social skills, higher functioning brain (in certain ways.)

>> No.25899608

Both the puzzle and forest should have been relatively easy, but as stated before, there comes to a point when you just have to let the stats speak for themselves and let a character roll for Intelligence, especially after experiencing something like that forest a time or two.

As for this, the Demon player is a fucking blight on humankind, one for his stupidity and two for his pettiness. As if a sword can't be replaced, jesus fucking christ.

I'm sorry that you have to GM for that group.

>> No.25900000

Wait, I remember you. Wasn't the demon player a total weaboo or something? The sword was specifically a katana, no?

>> No.25900193

>He loved it, and I was horrified.
That's the hidden trap (no pun intended) of the girdle of masculinity/femininity: you may think you're playing a big joke on the party, but what you're really doing is inserting one of the player's fetishes into the game for him.

>> No.25900451

I don't want to jump to conclusions about how you presented this puzzle to them, but I've had GMs implement pattern puzzles before without any sort of visual aid to let people see the pattern, forcing the players to try to create a mental image just from verbal description. Which is hard enough on your own, but becomes virtually impossible when you have a group of people unless someone has the wherewithal to start drawing a diagram.

Maybe you handled it better than that yourself, but I felt it was worth bringing up since I've seen several GMs fall into this pitfall before, and watch it stall their game for half a night.

>> No.25900589

I'm trapped playing this puzzle. It's fine at first but then I get down to one dot and I just can't figure out what to do.

>> No.25900910

I had a GM who tried to do a similar puzzle. It was a "every time you walk into a room the lights change" puzzle where we had to get them all to match. We ended up mapping the rooms in such a way that it threw us off completely. We assumed it had to do with some sort of teleportation, as another GM (me) had done a non-euclid thing recently. It didn't help that monsters were showing up in specific amounts in each room that we took as some sort of code.

>> No.25901430

Well, I'm the DM from OP's pic.

In a side mission the party was fighting a sea giant in the sewer system of their city who was fucking with the city's trading by sinking ships he didn't like. They killed it and its cohorts fairly easily and found among its things a chest with "danger" written on it in goblin and giant. While none of the PCs could speak either of them (which sort of surprised me because several of had like 10 ranks in linguistics), they also didn't take the chest anywhere to be examine, which was also odd because they had a lot of power and friends within the city. So they pop open the chest and find a rod of wonder and a belt of gender flipping disguised as a belt of strength, which I put in because the party was joking about it earlier in the week and I figured they'd have a bit of fun using it on someone. Somehow the party's magic item crafter guy failed his roll to identify what it was, despite having both a huge modifier and the DC being fairly low for their level. So he gives it to the swordsage, and pic related happens after the swordsage fails a DC 15 fort save on a level 11 PC with a decent con score and a cloak of resistance +4.
Things eventually got cleared up and the PC became a dude again through a magical god potion that could cure any ailment, though he sat on that bitch for like 5 levels.

>> No.25902193

I care. I want you to finish that coffee. Because I care.

>> No.25902448


This just reminded me of another pic he did for a play by post thing I did years ago, based on one of the dungeons /tg/ created, it was very silly. too bad that he used an upload service that's dead by now

I'm not even active on that place any more, but I had some good laffs rereading it. Thank you anon.

>> No.25902477

One rather dickish move of mine during any dungeon expedition is to hide at least one chest that had a magical trap in it. So my players pretty much hacked and slashed their way past all the undead, and the Wizard and the Rogue failed their skill check to disarm the trap. I look at my random magic effects sheet and rolled for an effect.
The Wizard and Rogue swap bodies for 1 hour before turning back to normal. At first we all thought that it wasn't too bad because none of us died or got hurt in a way.
Then the Rogue's player revealed that the Rogue was actually a woman disguised as a man.
Let's just say I had to find more "creative" ways to stop the Wizard from doing something too depraved.

>> No.25903056

In an online game, I once played an overly macho-man, super-uptight paladin of a religion whose morals were so strict they made the Victorians look like hedonistic sluts. After some long and convoluted shenanigans, I would up with a pretty-boy incubus falling in love with my character and turning away from the path of evil to pledge his eternal devotion and loyalty to me. Normally, my character would've been enough of a Lawful Stupid dick to kill a demon even if he was reformed, but the DM managed to engineer things such that it wasn't possible.

So, the party ended up with an extremely useful NPC minion (we were missing a rogue type character) who constant engineering ridiculously over-the-top romantic displays in an attempt to woo my paladin, like a demonic gay Pepe le Pew relentlessly pursuing a flustered Mormon knight. It was fucking hilarious.

Eventually me and the DM decided to just go all-in on this; I let the incubus finally seduce my character, who promptly lost his powers (due to breaking his vow of chastity) and had a freakout about his sexuality. That lead to a fun soul-searching subplot where he eventually did a complete 180, regained his powers as the devotee of a hippy free-love fertility goddess, and got gay-married to the incubus. By far the most fun character development I've ever had; later the DM sent me this picture and said it was his original inspiration for the whole plot.

>> No.25903503


Now that that is out of the way, that's adorable.

>> No.25903527

>a demonic gay Pepe le Pew relentlessly pursuing a flustered Mormon knight
This is the best image ever.

I want to play a character in this situation now, on either side.

>> No.25904711

Seriously, why don't experienced adventurers just Disjunction the damn thing on sight?

>> No.25904751


Disjunction is a 9th level spell man.

Somewhere like 90% of games won't even be near that level.

>> No.25904964

Online. Type with one hand.

Although varies too, I'm perfectly capable of rping out a full sex scene without actually fapping in process.

>> No.25905077

Get a decurse and take it off?

>> No.25905098

>Implying the Victorians /weren't/ hedonistic sluts

>> No.25905182

Get it to a wizard guild, explain what it is. Brace for disjunctions coming your way.

>> No.25906371

I made a Reincarnation table for familiars in a 3.5 campaign I was running, mainly due to the sorcerer sending his familiar off to die 'because I can always resummon it'. I packed it full of oddball stuff.

First time he rolled on it, his Raven came back as an imp.

Second time, he got Lamirez.

>> No.25906420

I gave them all stand powers after they crossed the boarder into Mexico. They reacted to it better than I thought.

Endgame had one of my players teleport another player into the heart of the sun.

>> No.25906641

Hey guys, could any of yall help me? I want to run a depressing as fuck campaign. I need it to be angsty and have no win scenarios but I can only think up 3 quests or so, do you have any ideas?

>> No.25906710

I've run multiple (one off) game sessions where I essentially catered to the players' fetishes - though made them earn their 'payoff' - and I didn't masturbate. Hell, it didn't even come to mind, since I was in my usual DM state of mind. I.e. "Work as fast as I can to keep up with all their crazy ideas." Was pretty funny, since one of them asked if I got off after the fact, and I couldn't stop myself from laughing, before explaining, no, didn't happen.

Naturally, it was online. I'd probably hide behind a couch and curl into a ball if I had to run that sort of thing in person.

Though I did have a rather long shower after the fact. The secret is, I have a fetish for satisfying my partners. They were all quite happy and spent so, uh... I ran off to finish up the adventure, as it were.

To be fair, I was a teenager at the time and my hormones were going crazy. I think the entire session amounted to "Random sex based plot twist!" being thrown in every five minutes.

These days I doubt I could run a game like that even if I wanted to. Now, a 'normal' campaign with sexual hijinks as a secondary aspect of the campaign, that's something more my speed these days.

>> No.25906762

Familiar reincarnation table? I may just implement that idea.

I've also thrown together a few custom reincarnation tables, including sub tables for sex, hair color, etc. I was going to run a campaign where Raise Dead wasn't an option, but reincarnation was all over the place. Mostly as a way of having a light hearted, quirky game instead of my usual. Never got off the ground.

>> No.25906776

Don't. If you want to run a campaign just to be depressing and shit all over the players, then just save the waste of time and have them watch fuck I don't know, Requiem for a Dream.

>> No.25906782 [SPOILER] 

Part 1
The female rogue ofthe group I ran, wantonly grabbed a jewel from inside a collosal skeletons eye socket. I gave her two Fort saves and he failed them both.
It cursed her and slowly sh transformed into glass. See through & Fully functioning for awhile before finally freezing in place. She couldn't talk or move and the others lashed her to A mount with plans to sell her. Stating simply "she shouldn't have touched it"

>> No.25906837

Because to become an expierenced adventurer you need to be a greedy, reckless fuck? Ergo, they are compelled by their very nature to use it

>> No.25906897

Disjunctioning artifacts is a terrible idea.

>> No.25906909

Thinking she was stuck as a statue forever and about to be sold, the player was prepared to reroll a character. However the party had a change of heart and decided to pay for a dispel magic. However they were cheap and payed the town clock maker , who dabbled in magic, to do the deed. The result freed her body and allowed her to move but she was still glass. Her waist also cinched inward to a ridiculous degree, o the point one could wrapt their hand around it. and her midsection also started to filled with sand. She had began slowly turning into a living hourglass.

>> No.25906953

>As a GM, have you ever done something purposefully odd to your PCs, such as having them enter your magical realm? Let's hear your stories.


>> No.25906990

As a side note she'll gain time powers to opens ate any inconvenience

>> No.25907066

I once made the BBEG gender swap all the PCs, but I only gave them enough elixir to reverse it for one of them. Long story short, the barbarian murdered the bard for the potion.

>> No.25907079

make the story long.

>> No.25907102

Well I mean not depressing but really morally grey, and harsh on them, I know they would really like it because they like that kind of thing I just need some more quests ya know?

>> No.25907108

I ooonceee maaade theee BBEG geeendeeer swaaap aaall theee PCS, buuut I ooonly gaaave theeem eeenouuugh eliiixiiir tooo reeeverse iiit fooor ooone ooof theeem. Looong stooory looong, theee baaarbaaariaaan muuurdeeereeed theee baaard fooor theee poootiooon.

>> No.25907131


>> No.25907185

Okie doke artichoke
>DMing group of first timers
>We have a Barbarian, Bard, and a Rogue
>Kept the story simple for them, basically these ancient masks hold all this power, end the world if all of them are brought together, etc
>BBEG is the typical wizard trying to end the world
>They encounter him in the second town they visit and try to attack him
>They do no damage to him and he simply laughs at them and gender swaps all of them for his own entertainment
>He then throws a small vial of the reversal potion in the middle of them to turn them against each other
>Bard quickly grabs it, attempting to be the voice of reason
>Barbarian sees this as an attempt for the bard to steal it for himself and stabs him
Not really that interesting, but the Barbarian is an extreme case of That Guy. He even caused him and the rogue to die later on since he was a murder everything without second thought kinda player.
>In my setting Kobolds are more civilized and peaceful
>Set up a few important kobold npcs in a kobold settlement/mine
>Hint that they're gonna be important to talk too
>Barbarian decides to attack the Kobold children for whatever reason
>Whole kobold army attacks and kills them
>They throw their bodies down a ravine

>> No.25907207

>misunderstood kobolds
>gender swapping

Yeah. The barbarian was That Guy.

>> No.25907208

Huh, was he roleplaying a racist asshole, who'd been living under a rock?

>> No.25907217

In Dark heresy I gave one character a beak, and the other a beard made of skin, like a chicken's.

>> No.25907911


Thanks anon, that's really sweet.

Their anger faded, and the twins continued their game.

Light showered the realms with Fire, burning it's lands and boiling it's Oceans.

From the heart of the Inferno, a creature arose, a thing of fire and flame. He was the first Elemental, the Lord of Embers. From him where the Fire elementals formed.

Darkness, in turn, covered them in Frost, creating great mountains ranges.

In the Cold another Lord rose, one of ice and snow. He was the Lord of Frost, and from him formed the Ice Elementals.

This began the First War, where Fire and Ice fought for dominance.

The Twins looked down at their creations with delight, enjoying the wanton destruction that the elementals wrought upon the realms.

But soon, the Twins grew bored again. The Elementals where powerfull, but predictable and most of all, Immortal beigns, not beign able to learn or change, their war was beginning to show the same patterns, repeating past conflicts over and over again.

Wishing to end the conflict, Darkness and Light bundled their powers, and created a third Lord, one chains and gates, The Lord of Thorns.

From this lord, formed from rock and mineral, the first Dragons arose, things with a soul of an elemental, but with the hide formed from Iron and Gold and Bronze.

And so the Lord of Thorns imprisoned it's brothers, bound then to the highest and Lowest of 7 realms, which would be forever known as Koraz, where Ice reigns eternal, and Karika, where life smoulders.

>> No.25907926

You like the works of Simon R. Green?

>> No.25908057


who's that? *search google* oh ok, well I haven't read anything from him, so I wouldn't know.

>> No.25908111

ah, and here I thought the lord of thorns was original. although, that was(is) just my ignorance speaking

>> No.25908115


although now I found some stuff from him, I'm ashamed I haven't.

>> No.25908138

I reccomend the nightside books, I found them good.

>> No.25908299

I once had a trap that would randomly polymorph you into a random race if you grabbed the alluring treasure.

Our Gnome Bard ended up as a Sylph for the rest of the campaign, just using a hat of disguise to make himself look like he used to.

Otherwise, no.

>> No.25911645

>sub tables for sex
Why would you need a subtable for sex? I mean, there's only two options, so you could just flip a coin, right? Unless...?

>> No.25911698

No, but I've had them encounter cyborg t-rex... what the fuck is the plural of t-rex? Whatever, there was like 3 of them. Mole men, genetically altered cats wearing powered armor, and other encounters that were weird.

We were playing a superhero game and I wanted to capture the essence of the weirder aspects of comics.

>> No.25912580

Haha, what idiots, they can't...solve....

>25 minutes later



>> No.25912728

Yeah, how about you go watch Grave of the Fireflies and masturbate tearfully, rather than drag a group of your friends with you on Everything is Shit, the campaign.

Seriously, what part of that premise sounds like fun? Why would your group want to dedicate hours of liesure time to something that's not fun?

>> No.25912737

why did i laugh

>> No.25912762

Aha, my MMOs have taught me something useful!

This is used in a few quests in DDO. Which uses a lot of puzzles and shit, now that I think about it. One of which is solved by performing the knight's tour on an irregular board, with teleporters to throw you off, while the rest of the party inevitably fucks the whole thing up for the one who knows what to do. Like the tabletop!

>> No.25912802

When one of the characters in my current game died, he was immediately reincarnated by the druid with the Last Breath spell. Then I showed him the table and asked to roll for race and gender. He came back as a young female elf.

At first the character was shocked, but for several days the party didn't really had time for anything except survival (they ended up on the Paraelemental Plane of Magma). Now, after several months of time, both IRL and in game, the character is quite content with his new body. And when he absolutely needs to become male again he simply casts Alter Self - this spell was learned at the first opportunity.

>> No.25913240

I had a combined list of sex and build/body shape, since I was going to roll for general build anyway and didn't want to add a coin flip onto a process that can already take an unusual amount of rolling and reading.

None of the material I have laying around delves into /d/ territory, besides the obvious 'and now the former guy is an attractive nymph' possibility. And you can see why I never got around to running a game with it.

>> No.25913418

I don't see, actually.

I'd play it.

>> No.25914917

What are these powers she gained exactly? Like control of time or something?

>> No.25917024

Probably haste, time stop, etc as spell-like abilities.

>> No.25917085

I'm guessing she would be limited somehow, right?

>> No.25919069

>Give players a neverending portal of anything
>expect them not to exploit the fuck out of it
if you open a portal to the nth deadworld and cause an infinite number of skeletons to spew forth, they'll start a business harvesting bonemeal.

>> No.25919126

Skeletons, you say?

>> No.25919690

I told my players about a closed, magically runed sealed door and let them keep failing at rolling various skill checks to open it.

Never in that about half a session of failures did any of them think to try the doorknob

>> No.25919756

You would not describe a door as sealed unless the players knew the door would not open.

You're a dick.

>> No.25919877

Awww, c'mon that is no fun

>> No.25919965


>have a transgender tf fetish
>played in two games ever
>both times character got changed from female to male

>> No.25920177

Aw, poor baby.

I've only ever changed the gender of one of my players' characters, and he reversed it as soon as possible. It was funny though.

>> No.25920403

I did word it fairly poorly, I admit. I meant to imply it was "airtight".

That campaign was doomed from the start, anyway. I specifically told people before I accepted their character sheets that it'd be a political/religious conspiracy espionage campaign. The only person actually roleplaying seemed to be expecting to turn the whole campaign into "running a merchant's guild".
>he spent all the starting gold on random shit to trade with NPCs

>> No.25920440


I've had ideas for gender-switching characters that take it beyond just fetish material, but I know I can never play them because I'd be too distracted, so to speak.

>> No.25920497

Any stories that you could share with us?

>> No.25920515

I have ideas for gender switched characters that are beyond fetish material as well.

But I can't play them because no one will let me.
I don't even fap to genderswap, I just love it.

>> No.25920526


Well, I definitely fap to it. Better if I wasn't distracted overall.

>> No.25920551

>Play first real D&D game
>Character gets enslaved and turned into a halfdragon in epilogue

>Play second D&D game
>Dice (open roll) accidentally turn my character into a halfdragon. (Random chance makes him even more speshul snowflake as the game progresses)

>Play third game (PF now)
>very briefly and bloodily temporarily implant a dragonscale into myself so I can pass a warded gate, enter an ancient dragon-tomb, and save someone

>Play fourth game (more PF)
>mad biologist/alchemist/augmentisist tries to turn my lizardfolk druid into essentially a half dragon (forcibly vivisecting and implanting dragon scales/claws/bits)

Fuck it. Next game I'm just playing a goddamn halfdragon.
>inb4 "No escape."

>> No.25920564

>hippy free-love fertility goddess,
If it's a fertility goddess why did it allow you to fuck a man?>

>> No.25920570

I set up the James Bond style confrontation with the BBEG to take place over breakfast once.

It's pretty funny watching PCs mix their "We will stop your evil plan!" posturing with eating delicious waffles.

>> No.25920588

Maybe haste 1/day, time stop 1/week.

>> No.25920602

>to become an expierenced adventurer you need to be a greedy, reckless fuck

>> No.25920618

Nothing like some games and food

>> No.25920717

Sounds like a fun character to play as

>> No.25920764


Do you have to flip her on her head to activate her abilities?

>> No.25920955

But playing while distracted is the most immersive of all!

I try to make all my characters a bit of both. Now if only I could find a group where that was encouraged...

>> No.25920966

>was running CP2020
>this dude was street samurai
>total dick to rest of party
>decided to charge a Bozo
>face full of chest bomb
>is on verge of death
>makes deal with Face DMPC
>decides to go with the most expensive medical care possible: nanites + speedheal + special MiliTech hospital
>is ~21K creds in debt
>signs away ownership of all worldly possessions as collateral
>no longer owns sword, motorcycle, internal organs or implants
>agrees to 15% compound interest rate
>owes monthly payment of approximately 730 creds
>context: an healthy heart or lung is worth 700 creds

>> No.25921000


This character idea has them flip gender all the time, I doubt my ability to concentrate in those circumstances. I should find some appropriate outlet for it though.

>> No.25921039


I like the permanent ones where it's a catalyst for character development.

>> No.25921062

Did you just GM fiat how much a heart or lung was worth?

>> No.25921067


I just like torture, I guess.

>> No.25921120

Oh, no.

There's a table for how much internal organs are worth.

>> No.25921134

Lame. Come back when you've gone four for five, then we'll talk.

>> No.25921220

This happened just recently actually.
>running group through sunless citadel
>find the white dragon wyrmling the kobolds are looking for
>party alignment, LG, NG, CN
>decide that they shouldn't put the dragon back to slavery, but to kill it instead.
>bring corpse back to kobolds
>huh, none of this is covered in the supplement book, time to be creative
>upon delivering the corpse the dragon keeper meepo is distrought and crying
>queen orders meepo killed
>meepo gets skewered by two other kobolds
>LG member is fucking pissed
>surprise round flurry of blows, rolling two natural 1's
>put kobolds on guard, javelins at the party's throats
>LG character attempt to defensive cast a color spray
>rolls another natural one
>he is super depressed OOC
>laugh uncontrollably

>> No.25921286

Nice get.
Also, yes. Yes he was, and yes it was.
Fun fact - the player rolled a character who was exactly the same, but an angel instead of a demon. He redeemed himself with the single most metal death I've ever run, firing what was essentially an endurance-powered gun so hard that he tore himself to atoms and shredded a massive Leviathan sea serpent from the inside, crushed skull to scaly tail, with the exiting bolt leaving massive, straight-cut ribbons of untreated dragon leather.

With an iota of credit to the dwarf player, by the end of the first hour he'd drawn a series of four circles, connected by lines, which matched the simple layout of the area they were in. Not that it served any use, so it seemed.

Here's a slightly more complicated "map" of the puzzle rooms. Green is the forking entrance corridor, which leads into two rooms; red is the forking corridor which would be revealed when they completed the puzzle, to continue downwards. Every room had a rope and a lantern.

It occurs to me that I didn't tell my players, in or out of character, to turn all the lights on (or off, though they managed this several times). I figured that they would think of this naturally, considering the fact that this temple was bigged up to be all about light & dark (there was a noticable change in the weak shadow creatures when all the rooms went dark, which I hoped would make them wonder what the polar opposite would do). Is this an oversight, or am I allowed to think that this would be easy to extrapolate?

>> No.25921366

I've always wanted my DM to slip a gender-bending belt into the loot for my guy to come across.

Mostly because my current character is basically Jaime Lannister, and playing an athletic, non-retarded Cersei might be oodles of fun.

>> No.25921551

Because the goddess was a fujoshi, obviously.

But seriously, read up on some of the crazy sex rituals ancient fertility cults used to get up to, especially the pagan Greeks. A whole lotta man-loving and sapphic passion going on. Besides, sowing seeds in a barren field is kinda symbolic, isn't it?

>> No.25921572

This thread is literally gayer than this flash. https://images.4channel.org/f/src/Baby_Boy.swf
I totally wasn't just looking for a place to post this gay thing.

>> No.25921681

Not as a GM, but as a player I had a GM allow the creation of sex-change potions by another player.

She used them for fetish purposes.

I used them as weapons.

>> No.25921707


>> No.25921756

It was simple, really.

I asked the GM if I could use them to demoralize anything I bombed.

Basically, it boiled down to a failed Save dropping them into a state of confusion and inaction, or entering a berserker-esque rage.

Fun times, until the Gnome decided to dump the bottles out.

In a town well.

>> No.25921802

>I used them as weapons.
You too, eh? Mine's a little bit of a /d/M but it's an online game and we're all enjoying ourselves so whatever. Getting back on track though: the ones in his setting had a saveless stun effect and he allowed me to have syringe arrows made. The rest is fairly obvious and was pretty enjoyable.

Shame the ingredients used were annoying to get.

>> No.25921825

I always like the braid of male elf and female dwarf hairs.

>> No.25921828

I did actually turn the male members of the party into females as part of a feud with a powerful wizard BBEG. I knew the group well enough to do it and make it entertaining rather than irritating. Overall it was good silly fun for a few sessions and then they defeated the bad guy and returned to normal.

Other than that I don't think I've ever done anything random or odd to my PCs. Continuity and consistency are hangups of mine, so I try not to violate them myself.

>> No.25921877

>I should find some appropriate outlet for it though.
ERP? Ero-lit?

What kind of development? Thought up any cool scenarios?

>> No.25921890


>In a town well

I like this guy

How long did it take until the town found out that it was the water?

>> No.25921910


I need to at least get it out in some kind of ERP and be done with it.

>> No.25921979

>braid of male elf and female dwarf hairs
Mother of god. He had the same thing but there was the added stipulation that they had to be willingly given and braided BEFORE being cut.

>> No.25922048

Not long.

Several nights later, we were ran out by a mob of angry villagers wielding the standard torch and pitchfork kind of deal.

Our exploits seem to have traveled faster than we did and we were embarked upon by several guardsmen as we crested the hill.

The gnome decided the best idea was to start throwing fireballs instead of talking, which led to a TPK

Was fun as long as it lasted, though.

>> No.25922577


>cool scenarios

Depends what you mean by cool, I guess.
I try not to think that far ahead in terms of tabletop characters but rather prepare the baseline and let the developments come from the roleplay. Plans never seem to work out.

I've been on a kick for giving the character a family or friend though. Someone they want to drop all contact with because of how awkward or uncomfortable they are with themselves. They kind of hang around too much and would eventually get ousted though. Daughters are my favorite along this line of thought. I've posted recently about one character who was turned into a girl of his daughter's age. His primary motivation is to live up to her standard of hero since he can't live up to what he thinks is her standard of father.

>> No.25923245

D'aww. Do you have a foolz link for those posts?

I agree with your baseline perspective: creating a character isn't making a work of art, but readying a palette, with the game and development as the masterpiece.

I'm eager to hear more concepts if you have any.

>> No.25923448


>> No.25923901

No, I just have >>25609325 one, which is a terrible post.

I'm trying to think of what other concepts I could post but I'm hesitant to. This really is just a bad time of the day to think. If I have time tomorrow I may resurrect the thread.

>> No.25924059

Bunnygirl too! This gets better and better! I'll be hoping the thread's still here tomorrow.

>> No.25924267

Was it all the same GM?

>> No.25924420

>I need to at least get it out in some kind of ERP and be done with it.
#mymagicalrealm on rizon.
f-list.net if you're not afraid of all the furries around.

>> No.25924439 [SPOILER] 


Yeah that comes from the character I would have taken the design from. It wouldn't be exactly like this because I've redesigned the character to divorce the two in my head, but I'd have to install the shitty game again to get a better screenshot, and that's not happening.

I'd also like to play the original character but "silver age teen titans" doesn't happen either.

>> No.25925206

What's the divorced bunnygirl character concept like now?

>> No.25925649

It was one of those occasions where I had a half dozen people lining up wanting to play, but interest quickly ebbed before the game could begin. Part of the issue may have been that I wanted to run it in Pathfinder and some of the players weren't familiar with it. I don't have a great deal of experience with PF, though.

Also, one of the players was trans and made it clear she couldn't handle her character becoming a guy. I had to point out that it's a risk -everyone- in the party would face equally and it's not like hunting down a high level wizard she could bargain with for a permanent polymorph effect would be such a stretch.

If you wanted male-to-female TFs, why didn't you make a male character? It would be like having a fetish for being dominated and beefing up your will defense and Intimidate skill: It's completely illogical.

>I try to make all my characters a bit of both. Now if only I could find a group where that was encouraged...
If you mean 'both' as in 'futa'... I don't encourage it, but as long as it's not a case of "I am blatantly getting off to this to the exclusion of actually playing the game", I wouldn't have an issue with it in my games.

Hell, I once let a player play a urinary incontinent character in a game. Though that ended poorly, because they clearly didn't want to -roleplay- the character in any logical way, they just wanted to get off. And were really obnoxious to the rest of the group without THAT element even coming up. And I mean obnoxious to the players, not the PCs.

I'm willing to let a lot of stuff fly if the player isn't a douche, basically.

>> No.25927196

>Hell, I once let a player play a urinary incontinent character in a game. Though that ended poorly, because they clearly didn't want to -roleplay- the character in any logical way, they just wanted to get off.
Okay, that? That is NEVER not getting off on a sick fetish.

>> No.25929982

I have campaign that's just chock full of odd things. Takes place in a forest being distorted by fey magic, and I have a whole bunch of non-combat random encounters just to illustrate the strange Alice in Wonderland-esque nature of the place. I originally intended to run it last year, though we only got two sessions in before it fell apart due to scheduling snafus. I'm going to be rebooting it soon with new players, but in those original two sessions the PCs encountered:
>a group of brownies sneaking into their camp at night to make them breakfast
>a grove of trees bearing assorted pastries rather than fruit
>a banana phone tree; the caller on the line was Rick Astley
And there's plenty more where that came from.

The forest is also a wild magic zone, using my own homebrewed wild magic tables. A goodly percentage of the time, the only thing out of place is a purely cosmetic temporary change to the caster or the target, like changing hair or skin color. In the dungeon crawl I ran beforehand to make sure that the wild magic wouldn't cripple spellcasters, by the end of the dungeon the party's beguiler had his hair grown down to his waist and changed some bizarre color, acquired a beard of some other strange color, his voice raised two octaves in pitch, and his nose and ears comically enlarged.

Result #63 on the "harmless effects" table is a temporary gender flip. Frankly, I hope it doesn't actually get rolled, but I couldn't resist putting it on there.

>> No.25930562


What, the design? I mean, I've not thought about it too much and I've actually debated switching back to fit a theme. Imagine his daughter's into the old tights and spandex designs (mostly because the guy probably has old comic books lying around he'd let her read. How she got into it.) so he sticks to it despite most heroes having much more modern street designs. Another way for him to not quite fit in and another opportunity for other characters to ask him things he might not want to answer 100% honestly.

Otherwise I would probably make it look like normal clothes altered to fit a theme, at least to start with. He's pretty poor after all, he's not touching his own money for fear of it coming back to him but I don't want it to be a bunch of random clothes he picked up from a goodwill or something. I'm still up in the air on the padding and dark muted tones of movie adaptations. It fits Cap and the Bat, sure, but Spiderman? I don't think the harlequin design would survive the transition to it either, I know Harley Quinn's been struggling to keep hers in. It's probably something I wouldn't be able to decide on until I knew the theme of the game.

I know that's not really answer but really I have something in my head but it isn't nailed down enough to be described.

>> No.25930668

They assured me before the game - and seemed quite sincere - that it was going to be about a physically challenged person overcoming hardship to be a hero. The campaign was essentially about B and C list superheroes, so I went along with it.

Then I saw them in action. Suffice to say they got thrown out before the end of the first session. To be fair, it was before I'd come to /tg/ and subsequently learned of /d/. I know better now.

I once had a player in a campaign (related to that one, but at a different date) make plans for installing sex toys into their power armor as part of an exhibitionism and bondage fetish. In character and out, I'm assuming. They weren't even 10% as creepy as the diaper twat.

Actually, it was pretty hilarious, since it was a super villain campaign. The PA character tried corrupting a hero by tempting them with sex. The hero essentially foil every evil scheme they came up with by distracting the PA character with sex. I kind of have mixed feelings about it, since the campaign wound up ending because the PA character was the only one with any MOTIVATION, but eh, it was actually a pretty organic progression for the character and I'm fine with sex in my campaigns as long as everyone else is, and no one complained.

Another fun story: I once played a character in a friend's game that had a colossal fetish for guns. A running joke among the party was that she had weapon specs and blueprints instead of porn and it was only treated in a comedic fashion. The twist? I don't have a gun fetish myself. Was pretty fun pretending, though I'll admit I probably came off as a giggly 13 year old to the group.

>> No.25930750

As a player, I was playing a bard who instead of wooing every wench he laid eyes on had an insanely specific and over romanticized idealization of beauty he was searching for. Just, super high standards that no one could ever meet, looking for that one girl who was as beautiful as they are in the stories. It was a pretty big deal for him, and he wrote a lot of awful poetry on the subject.

We unleash some powerful spirit late in the game, who as a reward gives each of us one wish.

The gnome wizard, the responsible one, wishes for the info we need to continue the quest chain.

The Half orc fighter wishes for a set of magic armor that is as durable as adamantine but as light as Mithril, and he gets it. That was pretty sweet.

My dude, obviously, wishes that he knew someone who was as beautiful as the girl in his poems. Wish gets granted... and the gnome turns into the spitting image of the girl I described. So not only turned into a girl, but into a heart-stoppingly, unrealistically beautiful one.

The cleric, who was the last one with a wish, had one chance to reverse the situation. He took one look at the situation and wishes that my bard and the new girl would be happy together until the end of our days. Because he hated that goddamn gnome.

Obviously, my bard and the cleric immediately high-fived. Wizard was... less than pleased.

>> No.25930782

last night's session actually. I has turned into a woman. I was playing a gladiator basically only wearing a skirt like object and a helmet. It was pretty lewd.
(pic unrelated)

>> No.25930831

>If you mean 'both' as in 'futa'...
Anon! I meant 'both' as in 'fap fuel and roleplayable character'!

Futa have never even occurred to me! Now traps on the other hand...

>> No.25930852

Ah. Well. That's good!

Traps are fine, too.

>> No.25930920


How did that happen? Did you lose a fight or something?

>> No.25931795

Huh, normally it's wizards and elves that accomplish such feats of magnificent dickery.

Bravo sir, bravo.

>> No.25931863

Now I just need to find a game where that's okay!

Know any GMs who'd like to run an RP that's slightly E with a female character (perhaps secretly/formerly male) trying to avoid bad ends?

>> No.25931922


It was the cleric who did the dick move there, since it sounds like the Bard didn't expect it to just transform someone nearby. The cleric was the only one who knew what the score was when they made their wish.

Even so, the high five makes me laugh.

>> No.25932171

>otherwise you wouldn't know how much disruption your actions did to that body harvesting Ghoul gang.

The cost of ambulances rose after a recent string of arsons and shootouts.

>> No.25932249

>allowing a wish to make someone fall in love with someone else
Your DM is potato.

>> No.25932269

All the players in the game I'm DMing were new when we first started. Perception checks were flying everywhere, and at one point the alchemist with a high perception bonus rolled a 1, so I took advantage.

"You're not sure, but you think you might have just be transported to Atlantis."

The same player also later blindly read a scroll he found on a desk, that I'd planned from the beginning to be skinsend. All of them started freaking out when I described his skin crawling off his body.

And then next session, they're going to finally read a scroll they found 2 sessions ago, but haven't read yet due to a missing player for the last session, and be teleported in to a section of the city's sewers inhabited by a dude who's been heavily fucked with by the current bbeg to the point that he's gone insane.

>> No.25932303


Nah. They just have to be happy and together.

Whats love got to do, got to do with it?

>> No.25932324

>bard and cleric high-five
Neutral evil bros4life

>> No.25932347

>euphemisms as an attempt at rules lawyering
I would light your character sheet on fire, in front of you.

>> No.25932426


>If you wanted male-to-female TFs, why didn't you make a male character? It would be like having a fetish for being dominated and beefing up your will defense and Intimidate skill: It's completely illogical.

I didn't want my character to get transformed either time (I don't want to bring my fetishes into the game), it just happened randomly. Literally; first time was a reincarnate spell, second was a trap of random character-changing which included gender. It was just kind of dumb how my fetish happened completely accidentally twice, but the wrong way around.

>> No.25932529


>not allowing things that are cute

>> No.25932591

>thinks pissing off one of the players for no better reason than amusing two other players is cute
>thinks having someone sit at the table, being pissy, is cute

We shall have to agree to disagree, friend Potato.

>> No.25932672


>pissing off a player
Sure, if you're a potato you might get pissed off.
Perhaps you should stop playing self inserts.

>> No.25932752

>you potato
>no you
Seriously, guys.

>> No.25932781


>> No.25932796


Stay out of this, cucumber!

>> No.25932836

Not wanting to play a character who is someone's magical realm bait is now a self-insert?

Wanting more for your character than for them to be fetish fuel is a self-insert?

That is outlandish.

>> No.25932875


We're talking about wishes revolving around love here. It's not even love, it's about being happy together and whatever form that would take. That's adorable.

>> No.25932880


I am going to break this to you real gentle.

There is no character you have ever played, no character you can even conceive of, that has not been well within the bounds of someone's magical realm. Yes, even if you considered them ugly or even asexual.

>> No.25932889


>maximum trolling

>> No.25932904

I'd still like to know what the plural of T-rex is.

>> No.25932938

Wait. I thought that the whole "using wishes to make people fall in love" shitstorm was an Aladdin genie rules reference.

Is this for serious something you get mad about? You realize there is a dirt cheap potion that does the same, right? It would honestly be bullshit if a wish COULDNT do it in DnD.

>> No.25932961



Not even joking.

>> No.25932982

Fucking Latin, maan.

>> No.25932987

>Tyrannosaurus rex, Tyrannosauruses rex
>T-rex, Ts-rex

>> No.25932999

I once bound a player to an alcoholic wizard who couldn't properly cast his spells. The PC was coasting through some scenarios with good Charisma checks, so when he rolled a 20 while asking for a second in a barfight, I took the chance to give him a powerful wizard that considered the player a God. The wizard would cast the proper spell, but usually to exaggerated or opposite effects. One particular moment was when the player wised up and decided to request spells from the wizard, figuring that as long as the party stayed behind the wizard, the errant spells wouldn't be a threat. He requested a Fire Spell and the casting roll was particularly good, so the wizard cast a spell I called "Fireball of the Solar God". The resulting ball incinerated the enemy mob, but the spell caused blindness in the user, turning the drunken wizard from a semi-competent screw-up into a walking death-trap. I remember the looks on the other players' faces whenever the wizard's master requested him to "cast a spell in a random direction".

>> No.25933090

Nobody said you have to be their "magical realm bait" all you have to do is love the wisher/other subject of the wish. How character reacts to his new feelings are completely up to you. You could be the cool suave lover who doesn't let any shit happen to the target of your affections or you could be so obsessed that you kidnap them and lock them away so that only you will love them and they will love only you, and anywhere inbetween those two.

>> No.25933122

Uh, well... Me. Though I'm pretty burnt out on DMing lately, so that won't help...

"Avoid bad ends" is pretty much my signature style. I run games under the assumption that the party will eventually succeed in their ultimate goal and I make sure that ultimate goal is actually doable, at least upfront. May not be easy, horrible luck or dumb decisions may kill one or two, but as long as they don't -royally- fuck shit up, they can still pull through.

The journey is the main focus, generally. My last campaign ended with a grand total of about a half dozen dead NPCs... total. Across the entire campaign. Party seriously took the "you are the defenders of the peace" to heart. Though two of those NPCs got resurrected. Mostly. Both were pretty traumatized by the experience, one was still comatose in the epilogue. They did manage to get their asses cursed, which was partly a sequel hook. Though the curse was more 'inconvenience' than anything overly harmful. God of time aged them down into kids. Except, ironically, the youngest party member. The dice had a sense of humor that night, since I rolled for who got hit with it...

Nah, sounds more chaotic neutral to me. Selfish, assholish, but not strictly hurting anybody. Depending on the degree of mind alteration involved. If the wish interpreted it as "make 'her' love him instant and forever", pretty fucking bad. If it was "Just can't turn back", not so bad... So it's a dangerous fence to be on, but not strictly evil. Neutral-leaning-evil.

>> No.25933274


>> No.25933282

Ah, guess I misinterpreted what you meant. Sorry.

>There is no character you have ever played, no character you can even conceive of, that has not been well within the bounds of someone's magical realm.
This is most definitely true. Also slightly awkward when you have to explain that, no, your young female wizard was not intended as pedo paid, she was supposed to -creep the party out- by being an emotionally stunted sociopath with a brutal streak. I was hoping they'd work to redeem her. Campaign died, though.

Though the first session was hilarious. DM decides that the bugbears are going to bypass the entire front line to single out the little girl who hadn't even looked angry, let alone attacked anything. Ignore the paladin in plate, the archer, etc. They hit the wizard. Wizard's turn comes up right after, followed by some well fluffed (That isn't ego stroking: The other players complimented my writing) attack, rolling amazingly high and damage and pretty much winning the battle in one shot, as the rest was mopping up the wounded.

The rest of the group instantly voted her party leader. It was a surprise, but kind of a warm, fuzzy feeling, looking back.

>> No.25933331

Could be neutral good depending on your interpretation of who really did the mind alteration. The cleric only wished for happiness, whatever perversion of that the wish caused isn't really a part of that.

>> No.25933547

That's nothing. I once gave my players Many Decks of Many Things.

In a playing card tornado.

Originating from a portal in space and time.

>> No.25933570

But you won't be DM burnt forever, eh? We should make plans!

How on earth did the players manage to keep s many NPCs alive? Got any plans to follow up on that sequel hook?

The god of time scenario could come up in our plans, what with being part of reincarnation's effects.

>> No.25933571

So what the wizard should have done would be to ask if 'happiness' included wealth, status, perfect health...

I'm not even sure how a wish for 'happiness' would even work without fundamentally altering the target's mind, since it's my understanding - and correct me if I'm wrong - that Wish is a one-off effect. It does what it does instantly, changing whatever, then stops. It doesn't persist, so it really -can't- guarantee life long happiness without making the target incapable of not being happy.

>> No.25933639


>> No.25933715

It was a much more optimistic campaign than my usual. I don't run GRIMDARK campaigns, but they usually aren't so... pleasant.

But the short version is: Against anything sentient they would only use non-lethal attacks. The party also worked their asses off to rescue anyone the villains captured, which led to about a third of the campaign consisting of rescue missions. Another major factor was that, besides the god and one completely unhinged villain, most of the antagonists were acting in a misguided attempt at helping the world. Short version: They felt neglected and forgotten by the current government and wanted to usurp it. By setting up the revived god as their god queen. Well, one major villain was planning to take the god's power for his own, but was still working with the rest of the villains to further their plans. It was a kind of 'may the best man win' rivalry. Unfortunately, they were tricked about the god's true nature.

And I do have plans to run a sequel in the relatively near future, but it wouldn't work for what you want. It was an MLP campaign, okay? And no force on earth is getting me to mix ERP and pastel ponies. That being said, I have at least a dozen campaign ideas floating around my brain and at least four could work. I'll probably make a thread on /tg/ if I ever get around to running one.

>> No.25933750

I'm not aware of such a stipulation as a "one-off effect.

Most of the rules around it revolve around the wish duplicating other spell effects.

But I don't know

>> No.25933801


So one of my players' characters have become undead, through defiling a temple, and has acquired a baby ghoul. She also has ghoul fever, but she's unaffected, since she's undead.

Does that count?

They're all having fun. That's what counts, right?

>> No.25933862

>They're all having fun. That's what counts, right?
Aye. Proveed.

>> No.25933866

As I said, I'm not certain myself, that's just what my brain is telling me.

Though for context: I've not played 2e in ten years and I've not even looked at 3e/PF book in many, many months.

>> No.25933905

In 3.5 I gave the half-elf barbarian an amulet that basically let him get 2 rounds in a row because, come on he's a half-elf barbarian and there's no way he's going to be relevant in combat. What I didn't count on was the fighter/druid investing much more heavily in the fighter side over the druid side, the wizard being extremely stingy with spell casts because components don't grow on trees you know, and the bard not making use of any of support-y uses of perform, diplomacy, or intimidate in favor of trying to increase his kill count despite almost all the enemies being humans or elves.

Needless to say, as the only person who wasn't terribly optimized for combat who participated, the barbarian killed everything all of the time. Amulet did have some interesting side effects. It was cursed, so he couldn't not experience every moment of his life in slow motion. He had to sleep in the middle of the day or risk being fatigued as per going without sleep, spoke fast to others, and had to sit and listen for people to finish their sentences. The player was great at roleplaying the impatience.

>> No.25933922

Ah, it makes sense in a nonlethal, villains on the same side really, kind of game.

I wasn't suggesting I play in a sequel; that would feel intrusive and I wouldn't know all the background. Just the basic concept of messing with time as well as gender, like reincarnation. I like MLP, but I couldn't ERP in it. In fact, it'd need changes, like being at least a bit darker, for me to have much interest in roleplaying in its setting at all. But if you make a thread on /tg/ later, how will I find it?!

>> No.25934051

I should note that she didn't birth it or anything, it's just one of the ghouls they were fighting (Rise of the Runelords) were a little girl in the AP, so I decided that since she was undead, and had ghoul fever, it would think that it was it's mommy.

So now an undead catfolk ninja runs around with a 9 year old human ghoul girl on her shoulders.

>> No.25934155

The campaign was a bit darker than the source material. The deaths, for example. Also the fact that many of the cultists trying to revive the god were either explicitly orphans or had been bullied, outcast or in rare cases physically abused/assaulted. It wasn't portrayed as a -common- occurrence, as the game was still high on optimism, but there were a few more real world issues. One of the main 'villains' was a guy who had been ostracized by his community as a child and was actually tortured, leaving him with a lot of scars. And it was portrayed as one of the most vile acts that could be done. Was also meant to be tragic, since it deeply effected him: When the party confronted him and asked if he was going to be the one to become the god's host and rule the nation, he was quite clear the fact he didn't feel he was worthy. And this was a man whose sole motivation was ensuring no one suffered like he did. It... got a little -too- dark at times. Had to keep reminding myself not to fall into old habits.

But yeah, I've been meaning to run a campaign where normal Raise Dead spells aren't available and Reincarnation is frequent, with a lot of cursed magic items and traps for transformative effects and such... Which I'd be completely up front about with the players, since it is veering hard into /d/M territory.

>But if you make a thread on /tg/ later, how will I find it?!
By my excessive use of spoiler tags, of course. And possibly my semi-frequent apologizing to people on the internet.

>> No.25934534

The campaign ended with the players planning how to storm (pun very much intended) the Cloud Castle of the Storm King that one of them had 'inherited'. Good times.

>> No.25934601

That's... a lot darker. That was less dark than your usual campaigns?! I'm scared of asking about your 'old habits'...

Ahh, for that reincarnation campaign...

But everyone uses spoilers! And I don't see ever OP, let alone later posts in threads! That's a wholly insufficient answer to the question! I demand you apologise! :P

>> No.25934909

Not the other Anon, but your campaigns sound very interesting. So, should you make another campaign and miss a player... you can shoot me a mail.

No obligation of course, but you know...if you remember it, and need somebody, I'll be there

>> No.25934961

Well, to be fair, it was ONE guy in the entire campaign that got disfigured by ONE other person. It was an anomaly.

The orphan thing was just realism: Sometimes kids are orphaned. It happens. And the party actually managed to turn it into an advantage, in a way. One of the major antagonists decided she didn't want to go through the whole 'resurrect a possibly insane god' plan, but stuck with the cult to look out for the orphaned kids that got dragged into the mess. The party secured her amnesty for any crimes she was involved in, guaranteed they'd build an orphanage for the kids and thus secured her support. She was a welcome source of information. I like it when players try the diplomatic approach, rather than "I'm just going to keep punching them until they stop being a problem, okay?"

The 'old habit' is just that my campaigns start out with the tone I'm going for, but get progressively darker unless I keep an eye on them. Sometimes I need to take a few weeks off to relax. I'm not going to get into why that is.

>I demand you apologise! :P
I am so sorry. Do I deserve a spanking? Nein. :|[/spoil][/spoil]

>> No.25935032

>If you wanted male-to-female TFs, why didn't you make a male character?
Anon probably didn't expect genderswaps to come into the game, and would presumably have played a male character if he'd known. But failing becoming a girl in-game, he'd decided to just play a girl from the start.

>> No.25935625

It happens, but for a game to focus on it, that's dark. I don't object to that darkness on the contrary!, but it is an option and a game without it can still be realistic.

I share your fondness for diplomatic solutions. Subtlety + more people thankful to you + fewer people seeking revenge on you = good, imo.

See, now we're talking about spankings! This is what should be coming up in the context of a new campaign!

>> No.25936060

My BBEG was an Illusionist who transformed the party, one at a time, to the opposite sex, some to other races. Had an in game ability that let him keep up the Illusion, all in their minds, for a couple of days. Much angst, drama, sex jokes, etc. Best part? I managed to set it up so that each player was told that they were the only one affected, but they all believed everyone was. Remember, all of this was an Illusion!

>> No.25936422

>It happens, but for a game to focus on it, that's dark.
Oh, you have no idea... But it was fun to tease the party with a line here or there, the occasional rumor, so they had to piece it all together for themselves... And then they ask orphan woman they convinced to help them about what she knows... They really weren't prepared to hear the blunt truth. It was quite different from the other major villain at the time, who was just a royal guard that abandoned his position to pursue personal power. Notably, ALL THREE of the cult leaders went turncoat in their own ways. A shame the scarred guy's lieutenant was completely insane, knew the truth about the god of time and backstabbed everyone so she could resurrect the god.

The party did have some problems on the diplomacy side, because the party Bard was run by an idiot. The player didn't understand how his abilities worked, assumed he was the party leader and got offended when he was told he wasn't (he was the party FACE, key difference...) and played his character as a complete asshole despite it not fitting the character's biography at all. Other players took issue with it, so I talked to him. On multiple occasions.

"Look, I don't think you mean to make your character such an asshole, but it's how he's coming off. You may want to tone it down, if that's not how you want the PC to be viewed." He didn't listen. And he complained when his character got treated like an asshole. And he complained when he got a Diplomacy penalty for repeatedly insulting NPCs because the concept of "Calling a man a coward when he's holding his ground against you despite your six-against-one AND terrain advantages, will MAKE HIM NOT LIKE YOU." Which was apparently a foreign concept to the guy.

Bard's player isn't in my games anymore, since he does the same shit in every campaign: Don't understand the rules, feel entitled, be as dense as a brick.

Rest of the group is good, though. All three of them.

>> No.25936804

In hindsight, this is really off topic. Sorry about that.

On topic, in a superhero campaign, the party was trying to get a few opposing groups of supers to band together. The meeting got interrupted by aliens teleporting explosives into the foundation. But the aliens, teleporting and the alien's intent on fucking shit up were all previously established. Not all that odd, really...

Also, one of the factions consisted solely of one nutty scientist and his army of squirrel girls. Each of whom had a number... 'Noin' was their contact in the group, as I recall.

...It was sort of 'silver age meets dark age.'

>> No.25936845

As a GM no, but as a Player I recently was transformed into a wereshark during an opera.

Now me and my crew are in jail because I almost killed the captain of the guard, my husband, some of my crew, and also because I killed some normal civilians I guess. Fucking lycanthropy. Wasn't out of the bag, I got bit by a shark dude waaaay earlier back. Even though I lost control of my character, it was intense not knowing what was going to happen and not having any control over it, now I understand why it's a goddamn curse.

>> No.25940238

>squirrel girls
fuck yeah.

>> No.25942520


So I thought about it a bit today and realized there wasn't anything all that great about any of the other ideas, at least in my mind. Sorry I never really got on that.

>> No.25944108

...is potato some new lingo I've missed?

>> No.25944129

fuck yes

>> No.25944149

Obviously a portal 2 reference.

>> No.25944168

wizard captures all PCs at beginning of game, experiments on them. As they 'escape' they find, in a concealed alcove, potions of ...I forget how they were labeled, but it was in such a way that they'd expect it to reverse their experimented-upon-ness.

The bottles, when checked for magic, radiated Transmutation.

Instead, they caused them to sprout various additional arms, heads, tails, etc. (The transmutation of the *LABELS* wore off shortly after they drunk the potions, of course.) [No, I don't mean dicks. Come on.]

>> No.25944183

What, really? That's pretty dated to come out now.


>> No.25944498


No, not really, he's talking about autism because he's a terrible person.

You know, "I can count to potato!" How clever.

>> No.25945826

How bad did they all lesbians?

>> No.25945841

It probably says a lot about the setting that one of the major NPCs was a man calling himself Dr. Fluff, who had vat grown squirrel girl clones, some of whom could and would swing around miniguns. As I said: Silver age meets dark age.

What were the experiments?

>The bottles, when checked for magic, radiated Transmutation.
Unless they rolled well enough to identify the contents accurately (though using Identify would be preferable), that is... pretty stupid. At least test the potion on a rat or something first.

>> No.25945893

Shame, but thanks for mentioning it.

>> No.25948704

You're not alone. I had to shrink it to 3x3 to make it solvable.

>> No.25949818

Running a Dark Heresy campaign.

The party bookworm had his arm inadvertently mutated. This was due to contact with some nasty ass warp fluids. It turned into a horrific tentacle made of twisted and blackened bone...that he had no control over ofc.

Judicious use of a plasma cutter and a bionic arm solved that problem for now, but "Corruption of the flesh has its roots deep in the heart".

I often send him private messages about how he suffers from "Phantom Limb Syndrome" and that he can still "feel" the corrupted arm, as it tries to strangle party members/people he talks to.

Other than that? The last session involved the following scenario.

>Incapacitated party assassin lies in front of sadistic demon host
>Demon Host picks her up by the neck and stares into her eyes
>Demon Host: "Oooooh, those eyes. They have seen so much death...so beautiful..."
>Demon host leans right in and whispers in her ear..."I think I'll take one."
>Demon Host procedes to slowly tear at and pull out the sniper's right eye
>Party lost their shit
>Pic = MFW

Gotta love grimdark settings

>> No.25949953

>>party finds a headband of +cha
>>someone equips it
I tell them to make a will save, they fail. I hand them a note
>>headband of douchiness
>>you must say everything in a sarcastic and condescending voice
>>your character is not aware this is happening
>>if another character tells you what's happening you can make a will save to believe them, but only one save per person or group. Failing the save results in you thinking they're just being dicks
>>headband cannot be removed until decursed
>>until you believe you are cursed, the thought of having remove curse cast on you will always seem like a bad idea

>> No.25950735

This is why I can't play classical fantasy tabletop games, /tg/. I wouldn't be able to keep myself from becoming that guy. Not after all the shit I've read here.

Every Man and Woman in the story would be polymorphed into lusty Kobolds or Thrii-Kreen within a few days. Guaranteed.

Oh well, I'm safe in Sci-Fi.

>> No.25950878

Enjoy your cloning, body altering surgeries, nano-surgeries, genetic rewriting...

My superhero campaign here >>25936804 had alien-tech derived people jars that could be used to regrow limbs, repair nerve damage, rewrite genes, grant super powers... Half the PCs across two campaigns gained their powers from them. The squirrel girls were all grown in reverse engineered ones. Though it wasn't a strict "magically fix everything" devise, as each treatment had to be specifically customized for the individual and generally required -weeks- of repeated treatments at minimum. And there tended to be side effects.

Side effects may include headaches, migraines, flaking skin, pigmentation changes, growth of scales, fur, additional limbs and gender swapping. Even the mad scientist was smart enough to make everyone getting into one sign a waver and he was crazy enough to try building a flying headquarters in the shape of an acorn!

>> No.25951743

Okay, I remember another one: One session was running kind of slow, so I wanted to liven things up a bit. Party comes across some travelers that got attacked by bandits, one of the travelers got kidnapped during the ensuing fight, so the party had to follow the bandits' trail.

One guy got a natural 20, so just for a bit of randomness I ruled that he saw through time and space. I waved at him. The PC, that is. Then literally pointed him in the right direction. The character wasn't entirely sane to start with, to be fair.

On the other side of things: One of my players once wanted to use Diplomacy to convince an enemy to surrender. Specifically, she wanted to convince him to become her crossdressing boyfriend. Now, I'm the kind of DM that tries to say 'yes' when it's feasible, so I tell she can try, but it'll require spending the entire encounter doing nothing but talking, since rounds are so short. Then I joke "Now just watch, she's going to roll a natural 20..." She got a 19, but since she was playing a Sorcerer she had a huge Charisma modifier. Took us ten minutes to stop laughing.

She stopped coming to games soon after, though, since she went back to college. So I wrote her character out of the campaign by saying she decided to retire from adventuring with her boyfriend, since I wanted to leave open the possibility of her coming -back- if the player's schedule ever permitted it.

>> No.25951806

>not sure if BE or TG

Sort of my fetish either way.

>> No.25952855




Yeah, I've been spending all my time daydreaming about playing a supers game. I did come up with a high fantasy rogue idea after reading Gambit, involving the leaders of rival thieves guilds (which are also gender divided) but it's not very fleshed out.

>> No.25952890


Well, a TG naturally has some BE in it, doesn't it?

>> No.25953009


>> No.25953034

Female to male, rare as it is, still counts as TG.

>> No.25953045

>"Now just watch, she's going to roll a natural 20..." She got a 19, but since she was playing a Sorcerer she had a huge Charisma modifier. Took us ten minutes to stop laughing.
Why? Natural twenty isn't an instant auto win forever on a skill check. It's a 20+whatever. To change an attitude from Hostile to friendly is a 35 DC check that takes at least 1 minute of conversation. To make them devoted is a DC 50.
Assuming you just hand waved the rules aside, I still don't get what's so funny about this.

>> No.25953064

Even if a nat 20 doesn't actually mean anything for DnD-skill checks, it's still the best roll and somewhat, let's say, mystified.

>> No.25953135

Well, the situation was the funny part. And the enemy wasn't strictly "hostile" so much as pressed by circumstances into fighting.

As I said: Huge Charisma bonus, trained in Diplomacy, and I forgot to mention before: One of the party members assisted, since HE had previously been the target of the Sorc's fetish.

It was funny in the absurd "are we actually winning a fight with crossdressing?" way. Was probably funnier to us because we'd all experienced several session of her being the group's comedic relief, essentially, where she just kept topping herself each time...

Anyway, as for the 'automatic success' thing? It's something of a running gag with my group. They'll roll 20s on stupid things, like the bard getting a nat 20 on a check to follow a really easy trail (They were leaving in a hurry and carrying a hostage. I can't recall the numbers I used, but it couldn't have been more than a DC 12 check. Was level 2, though.) and roll nat 1s on dramatically important rolls, like making a big show of getting the final strike in on a recurring enemy. Hence my attempts to inject some humor into the rolls, since they won't feel like that nat 20 was wasted if they're laughing.

>> No.25953711


>> No.25954516

I kind of dislike changing things rapidly and significantly on my PCs.

On the other hand, certain things are hard to do incrementally.

>> No.25957408

>certain things are hard to do incrementally.
What sort of things?

>> No.25958137

Changing from a combat-focus to a social-focused game, evolving from a 'go place, kill things' manner to a more freeform or sandboxy setup, going from "it's just HP damage" to "you lose an arm", all sorts of things like that.

If things change to radically, I find my PCs often feel betrayed and suspicious.

>> No.25962173

True, but for practical purposes BE and TG always go together.

You could also have a trap turning into a flat girl. That needn't involve BE.

>> No.25964465

Ah, gotcha. Yeah, big/sudden changes are the kind that work best when arranged ahead of time OOC, or at least when you as a player are aware they might happen.

>> No.25965264

Not quite. In Latin it'd be _T. reges_.

>> No.25966476

This was more of another player's idea to fuck with a player than mine (I'm GM), but I went with it, so I suppose it counts. Also, sorry in advance for suckishness, this is my first storyteim.

Brand new group, very first session. Because things were decided on at the last minute, I ran a module for the first session, though I normally wouldn't. The module goes by the name A Dark and Stormy Knight. Basically, it let me bring the fuckers with completely disparate backgrounds together for a dungeon, under premise of a rough storm forcing them all into the same shelter, which was a crypt/tomb thingy.

The players were a Cleric, a Rogue, and a Monk. OOC, the Cleric is an absolute cock but he's an old friend of the Rouge and I. The Monk is the Cleric's little brother, and he's just goddamn dense, though the group just interprets his lack of roleplay as meditative silence/solemness.

Anyway, the Cleric managed to piss off the Rogue IC. He started ordering him around for trap checking and such, when the Rogue hadn't really even spoken to him. He didn't take kindly to being ordered around. IC, he came to the conclusion that the Cleric is a control freak, and he'd be doing him a lesson by showing him how to lighten up a bit. He did so soon.

The room this took place in was small, plain, and roughly square. However, it had a small stone chest built into the floor in the center of the room. This was where the arrangement between the rogue and I came in.

>> No.25966485

>Delicious flat chest
>In my TG?
I approve.

>> No.25966488

He was the first into the room, so he saw it all first. I had agreed to let him search for traps nonchalantly, such that the other players wouldn't notice what he was doing. He took a considerable penalty for it because he couldn't be thorough, but his roll was excellent and the trap was poorly hidden. So, he found it. It was a dart trap that fired when the chest was opened, and it hit people standing around the chest. Simple stuff. The rogue rolled well enough that he could surmise that the trap had very little chance of killing him if it did hit, and that he'd get a bonus to react/dodge the dart because he'd know it was coming, and from where.

Before I go further, let me explain the Rogue's motivations and why I was letting this shit slide on the first session. The characters were rolled without knowledge of who or what the others would be playing. This was intentional, because the characters were supposed to be of disparate backgrounds, they're not gonna know shit about one another when they're forced together. They might have a personality clash. I was kind of hoping for exactly that, because it could encourage interesting RP. Enter: The Rogue.

>> No.25966497

The Rogue was in a boy's orphanage in a large nearby town growing up. The local church offered the same deal to the orphan boys as they did to the homeless; every few days they could sit through a sermon, and if they behaved through the end of it, they could have a decent meal of bread and cheese. The orphanage made this compulsory to reduce food costs, so our young Rogue hadn't a choice in the matter. Eventually, the pastor doing the sermons started offering private sermons to individual boys, and the Rogue heard horrible rumors about what happened in those sermons. Sometimes, the boys didn't come back.

The Rogue panicked, the Rogue fucking dipped. at the age of 10 or so, he began making his living by stealing and skipping town when he got caught doing anything particularly bad. In short, he motherfucking hates the religious guy ordering him around..

Back to the room with the trap. The Rogue, already realizing that the Cleric was a control freak, figured he would lose his shit if his orders were disobeyed, especially meaningful ones. So, when the Cleric told the Rogue to look for traps, the Rogue waltzed right up to the chest to open it. The Cleric ran up right beside him to make sure he wouldn't be skimped on any of the loot. Trap goes off, Rogue successfully dodges the dart, the dart hits the Cleric doing max damage. Didn't kill him, but, it chunked him pretty good, and it turns out the rogue was right. He was flaming pissed, not only IC, but OOC.

>> No.25966518

He started bitching at the Rogue's player for not taking the game seriously (he's a control freak both IC and OOC,) and the Rogue responded IC simply stating that he did as he pleased.

The Cleric shat on the floor in rage and ran off alone. He got killed by a monstrous spider. The Rogue and the Monk proceeded to fly through the rest of the dungeon balanced for 3 people with just the 2 of them, and they looted it well.

The Cleric was too pissed to want to redo his character or take back the stuff he did, so that group ended on the very first session. I was absolutely flabbergasted.

I wouldn't be surprised if nobody cared enough to read these, but whatever, somebody might have enjoyed it. So ends my first storyteim, /tg/.

>> No.25966639


>> No.25966672

>that Cleric

>> No.25967046

Congratulations, Anon. You've found a player so incredibly buttmad that he reversed CoDzilla.

Seriously, I laughed. Not the best story time I've seen, but pretty good.

>> No.25967139

A-anons, you shouldn't have~

>> No.25970207

>be attracted to cute NPC
>get ring of wishes
>wish NPC was a girl
>tfw he hardly changes at all

>> No.25970533

If you're already attracted to them, what's the problem?

>> No.25971280

Once I put a door with runes on it that wasn't locked, but the runes spelled out a riddle that made it seem like a password lock like in LoTR. They spent 30 minutes trying to guess a password, each time a mini fireball (3d6) shooting at the space in front of the door

>> No.25971506

>The Cleric ran up right beside him to make sure he wouldn't be skimped on any of the loot.
So that asshole gives orders to everyone, and then sits on his ass to get the loot?

>> No.25972006

Not wanting to bother with reacharounds.

>> No.25972052

Wanting him/her to do reach arounds wasn't part of the wish.

That's a special quality.

>> No.25973642

It means you don't have to give him/her reacharounds.

>> No.25973731

Manuvered two players (One male, one female) who played female characters into agreeing to serve as monster breeding stock in order to have their support for an upcoming war.

>> No.25974081

I was only expecting the Rogue to be the one to be potentially hit and that the Cleric would get mad about recklessness. His shameless greed just made it all even better.

That's absolutely brilliant. I think I'm gonna steal that.

>> No.25974102

Those are some dumbshit or fetishistic players.

>> No.25974182

They popped out the monsters and surprise, surprise, they're now secretly intent on keeping them as well as any other women they find since they're so wonderfully fertile and quick to produce results. It's brewing up to be a war on two fronts now.

>> No.25974235

>muh fetish

>> No.25974699

I was once GMming a homebrew zombie survival/apocalypse setting where my characters ended up killing each other in a fight over an emerald they found. To reverse this and get the game back on track, using the emerald tore open portal to another dimension through which Sonic the Hedgehog came. He then ran around the world Superman style to reverse the damage, but somehow remained as an NPC because it was funny.

He was murdered by my whole party. They force fed him laxatives and then shot him to death while he was on the can.

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