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[ERROR] No.25698850 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Seriously, why does this guy even exists ?

> Emperor's Children are getting royally buttfucked by Imperial Fists
> "Hey, let's all make a ritual and summon the mightiest champion of Slaanesh, he'll get us out of here."
> "Who do we call ? Lucius the Eternal ?"
> "Not enough mana! Hurry, call Doomrider."
> Warp gate opens in the horizon, Judas Priest's Painkiller starts playing out of it.
> The battle stops as all stop to watch the comming of the mighty Champion of Slaanesh
> Music gets louder, reaches a peak with a guitar solo just as sounds of an engine revving start to come out of the gate
> Suddently a massive assault bike burst out of the Warp gate, red-white incandescent metal wheels that leave a fiery path where it passes.
> It's rider a massive Chaos Space Marine in appearance, muscular broad shouldered, using Heresy Pattern Power-Armour but with spikes instead of rivets. His boots have high-heels and his entire armor has spiky sharp ends, his face is pale-white and his hair is a fiery inferno of red, purple and pink. His face is long, his chin square but poity, his eyes glow red. His chest plate is drapped with chains and barbed wire, and slung across his back, a mighty two-handed sword that glows a bright green with the colors of evil. His lips are curled in an evil smile and his mouth is filled with teeth that are sharp and filled to a point with a lizard like tongue, which he thrusts out of his mouth, like a clown of Doom.
> The rider extends his fist in the air and does a horn hand, his finger tips long replaced by short tallons.
> The Emperor Children stare in disbelief, for their Champion has arrived bringing doom to their foes.
> "HELP US, OH MIGHTY DAEMON OF SLAANESH!" Screams a nearby Noise Marine.
> The Doomrider accelerates, and starts rapidly approaching the battle line between Loyalist and Traitor legions.
> "YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

>> No.25698877


> The Doomrider then rides past the Traitors and Loyalists and dissapears into another warp gate that opens in the Horizon.
> The only sign of his presence is a sentence left in the air as the Daemon Prince dissapears.
> The Imperial Firsts proceed to destroy the Emperor's Children to a man afterwrds.

>> No.25698882

considering GW's "No fun allowed, 40k is serious business" policy a better question would be why he still exists

>> No.25698908

Everyone knows that this is what plays when he is summoned

>> No.25698911

>"No fun allowed, 40k is serious business"

I cant wait for the new apocalypse book

>> No.25698915


> This post


>> No.25698943


> mfw

>> No.25698955

Doomrider is just a reminder that Slaanesh is insane and will reward anyone that takes joy to the extreme with his favor.

Even if that champion doesn't even care who's favoring him.

>> No.25698957

Is there anything about him pre-Heresy? It would be hilarious if he was the main character in an Emperor's Children book.

>> No.25698970



Doomrider is probably and inside joke the dudes at GW thought was funny.

> Let's make the favorite of Slaanesh a guy that just rides his bike really fast past people when he's summoned and then dissapears afterwards.

>> No.25698988

>forge world panel
>We are proud to announce that for our 30k series we are bringing back a fan favorite character from 3rd edition

>> No.25699007


> Fulgrim: "Did anyone see that bike Ferrus made for me ?"
> Suddently a Space Marine burst through the wall riding Fulgrim's bike to the sound of ACDC
> He then proceeds to crash through the opposite wall.

>> No.25699015

>"Who do we call ? Lucius the Eternal ?"
Pffft, not back in the ay they didn't.
Lucius the faggot is a relatively new invention. Doom Rider, like Comedy Orks is a reminder of when 40K used to be good.

Back in my day, get off my lawn, etc etc.

>> No.25699046

>Manus "Brother I will not build you another bike, you should be more careful leaving your things around like that"
>and so it was that on that day Fulgrim vowed to take vengeance on his brother for not building him a new awesome bike.

>> No.25699053


> "Brother Clay ? Sure, he's a nice fellow, loyal to the Emperor and does his duties very well. But he has a bit of a cocaine habit, if you know what I mean... Well, "a bit" if you don't consider that kilometer long line he snorted yesterday

>> No.25699868


Nobody wants Doomrider the normal, we want Doomrider the cocaine fueled rocket that walks like a man.

>> No.25700091

Looking up the YouTube video for the above song, I get the advert in pic related. Either someone messed up assigning adverts to videos, or Google has determined I need to see boring adverts due to my pathetic web-browsing habits.

>> No.25700533


>> No.25700634


> Seriously, why does this guy even exists?

>> No.25703903

Holy shit this is wonderful.

Shame you didn't manage to fit it all in to one post, but god damn that glorious build up.

>> No.25704063

>From the yawning Maw of Warpspace come the blazing wail of an Electric Guitar.
>It is quickly accompanied by the crash of drums as lighting flashes forth and the Maelstrom begins to spin violently.
>The enemies of Slaanesh cower when a daemonic scream ululates over the battlefield.
>From the sky a fiery missile hurtles to earth, issuing a cry that sounds akin to "OHHH YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!"
>Just before he plummets into the midst of their ranks, another portal opens just beneath this hellspawned projectile, leaving only the faintest echo in the air as a reminder of his presence.


>> No.25704088


>> No.25704098

The guy on the album art likes them, at least.


>> No.25707908


>Samaritans in search bar
>Suicide tabs
6/10 would chuckle again.

>> No.25714387

Faster than a Las-bolt, terrifying scream
Fueled by coke and Metal, he is daemon and machine
He's a daemon biker - breathing coke and fire
Summoned by the cultists he is ni-igh

He. Is. The Doomrider This. Is. The Doomrider

Planets devastated - mankind's on its knees
A daemon comes from out the Warp because a psyker sneezed
Drowning out the thunder, brandishing his steel
Evil is now riding deadly whe-eels

He. Is. The Doomrider This. Is. The Doomrider AAAH! *Instrumental*

Faster than a Bolter Rocket, louder than a Noise Marine
Chromium plated daemon metal, brighter than a thousand suns


Riding high on cocaine, wreathed in eldritch fire
Armed with daemon weapons, he lights their funeral pyres
Firing Plasma weapons - Forever he will ride
He's bringing Armageddon to them a-all

He. Is. The Doomrider This. Is. The Doomrider
Bane. Of. Man. Doomrider Dead - Ly. Wheels. Doomrider *Instrumental*

He. Is. The Doomrider This. Is. The Doomrider
He. Is. The Doomrider This. Is. The Doomrider

Doom. Doom. Rider. Rider, Doom. Doom. Rider. Rider.
Can't. Stop. The Doomri-der-errrrrrrrr ... DOOOMMM!

>> No.25714763


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