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[ERROR] No.25001324 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Eldar thread?

>> No.25001401

Tits are too big. Not a real eldar, clearly a calidus assassin in disguise.

>> No.25001449

You mean chest-ass...

>> No.25001465

I like that the jaw thing makes it look like she has a beard.

>> No.25001521

The fuck did you just say, mon-keigh?

>> No.25001527


>> No.25001539


>> No.25001555

this makes me extremely uncomfortable.

>> No.25001574

You should wear looser underpants

>> No.25001593

Ba-dum TSH!

>> No.25001629

You heard me

>> No.25001703

>> No.25001922

in before thread devolves into cancerous porn swap and circle jerk

>> No.25002496

And that would be bad because...?

>> No.25002532

>porn swap
I don't understand.

>> No.25002557


>> No.25002613

Whats it like to fuck an Eldar?

>> No.25002628

That's because cancer cells are incapable of higher function.

>> No.25002652

I felt disturbed, then i read to the Ork Ending
fucking full win

>> No.25002671

>> No.25002692

>full of win

>> No.25002756

Fun Fact: An Eldar woman requires several fucks in a period of years to produce an eldar baby.

>> No.25002764

This is why we can't have nice things.

Any news on Striking Scorpions updates?

>> No.25002781


The Deldar have all but automated this process.

>> No.25002789


>> No.25002795


>> No.25002805

Shyeah, that's why the Dark Eldar value the Trueborn, rather than their vat grown masses.

>> No.25002901

Not again!

>> No.25003208

Nothing directly about Scorpions, but there is a farseer power designed to help assault squads get into combat. Still not addressing the core problem though. Aspects need to be able to do their one job without having to be baby sitted by farseers and exarchs.

That said, I think they'll only get better with Quicken and if the Autarch rumour is true we'll be able to get hose bad boys as troops.

>> No.25005439

That post is my favorite post ever on /tg/. Thank you for sharing.

>> No.25005679

Hey man, you know how it works with 40k.

Until they replace it, the old cannon is still valid, no matter how old.

>> No.25005871

Xenology is intentionally full of lies and misrepresentations because the Inquisitor is actually a necron

>> No.25005936


Orks make everything better.

>> No.25006346

As part of ongoing diplomatic efforts with a minor Craftworld, you have been ordered to live with an Eldar Titan crew. These orders come from the Fabricator-General himself. Your hosts are twins, who happen to be powerful psykers.

Their quarters have only one bed.

Are you a bad enough dude to carry out your mission?

>> No.25006392

Quick someone post that "drawing beards on elves" picture

>> No.25006411


Thank the Omnissiah I brought a lawn chair.

>> No.25006431


>> No.25006456

Kill them both and then defect to the Tau.

Bitches ain't got SHIT on Greater Good.

>> No.25006469

>> No.25006472


Wakfu. Riiiight.

As if Cras haven't been called "humans." Or Sadidas. Or Iops. Or frigging Eliatropes.

>> No.25006502


>> No.25006517

>Eldar Titan crew

Looks like someone's gonna be a Wraithknight pilot soon.

>> No.25006555

Autarchs are huge assholes

>> No.25006562

So, which one of them gets destroyed for this?

>> No.25006602

thats the one

>> No.25006608

You are decorated for unusual forethought.
You are accused of Heresy for willfully disobeying an order from the High Lords of Terra. Assassination follows not long after.
I don't know what the fuck?
Can humans even do that?

>> No.25006633

That is some funny shit man.

>> No.25006736

sleep while hanging from ceiling thanks to servo arm

>> No.25006763

>having an Imperial assassin step into the octagon with literally a gorillion Tau and hope to last 5 rounds

>> No.25006787

I am imagining a techpriest with clawed feet hanging from the ceiling like a bat, wires and shit everywhere. It is some funny-ass shit.

>> No.25006823

>implying if it was a Vindicare they'd even know he was there
>implying if it was a Callidus the Tau force you joined isn't commanded by an assassin
>implying if it was an Eversor they wouldn't maul their way through a whole goddamn Tau army with their bare hands, laughing in a drug fueled rage, before jizzing themselves as they yank your skull off your spine

>> No.25006826

>player defects to nippontau for the protection money
You're bretty shitty, sis.

>> No.25006841

>The tau behind you was actually a callidus.
>The tau behind her/him/it was actually an Alpha Legionnaire.
>The tau behind him was really the changeling.
>The tau behind it was a deciever shard.
>The tau behind that is just a tau and is now very confused.

>> No.25006849

that giant ass arm mounted on his back, the one that can lift a tank, it also allows them to hang from rafters and stuff to work from gantrys

>> No.25006865

Your typical SPASE MUREENERS fanboy kid in her natural habitat.

>> No.25006886

And then they were all Alpharius, except for Omegon.

>> No.25006890


>> No.25006904

>The tau behind it was a genestealer

>> No.25006926

Tau assassins are MULTIPLE ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE better than IMPURRIAL assassins anyway.

>> No.25006961

Speaking of the Tau....

It's more or less confirmed that the Eldar had a hand in their uplifting. But the question remain, for what reason did they do that?

>> No.25006974

Do the tau even HAvE assassins?

>> No.25006979

>The tau behind it was also just a tau, but was a spy for Farsight

>> No.25006983

The tau don't need assassins, they just get the water caste to talk you to death

>> No.25006991

Necron assassins (Deathmarks) are the apex of their field.

Don't argue with me. It's a fact that the Necrons are the best.

>> No.25007025


They do political assassination all the time when they want to assimilate/subjugate a planet.

I think they use Drones.

>> No.25007027

Well, when people don't have kids, they usually have a pet. A blue, small-souled genius pet.

>> No.25007031

So eldrad would have another young race to "Guide and Advise."

>> No.25007038

EVERYTHING IS ASSASSINS IN TAU. The basic Fyre Warrior is pretty much a diet Vindicare.
Why do you think Tau are so obsessed with MAXIMUM RANGE?

>> No.25007057

A Cadre of the best assassins in the Imperium were sent to kill Abaddon.

They got butchered. If they can't even kill Failaddon.....

>> No.25007059

...this makes too much sense. Seems more DE on the surface, though.

>> No.25007075

To compensate for their small combat knives

>> No.25007077

Shits and giggles?

>> No.25007110

An army that isn't going to kill everything, but can fight chaos without a bajillion forms of defence?

Seems like a good idea for a race desperately trying to keep chaos away

>> No.25007115

Craftworlders don't do ''Shits and giggles''.

Everything is a part of a grand plan fabricated by the threads of fate and tempered by the masterful design of the Eldar.

>> No.25007135

And the Tactical Genius of Abaddon

>> No.25007163

So much about this post.

>> No.25007180

Abaddon did beat Creed and burn Cadia in the retconned 13th Crusade.The despairing Creed cursed Abaddon name as he retreated while his men and people were being butchered.

Creed should hand over his tactical genius title and quit!

>> No.25007182

... so, if I'm one of those faggy campaign-RP-over-e-mail people... How the hell do I act toward the tau?

(LGS has campaigns with bad justifications for the various forces to be teaming up, I play eldar, it's us and Tau against a pair of smurf players.)

>> No.25007235

Eldtau think the Ultrasmurfs are KAYOSS in disguise or some shit.
I don't know.

>> No.25007257

Use them as tools but treat them well and honorably if you can. This is to open a door for more alliances in the future.

Try to endure their preaching and remember despite being a nagging and annoying bunch, they are one of the few races that will listen to what you say and consider it. Also they are naive, so try to exploit that.

>> No.25007304

Ultramarines are marines and they will hate Xenos scum.

Tau and Eldar join forces to beat them back.

Or the Ultramarine captain may cause or become something that will threaten the Eldar. So the Eldar joined forces with the Tau to end his threat before it has begun.


>> No.25007329


so funny maymay

>> No.25007377

Because the Eldar themselves had failed as the galaxies dominant species.
They could not master the the darkness within their minds and their souls and so they were swept away by their own hubris.

In their wake came the Imperium of man, a dynamic force of conquest and unification (for humans) and for a time it seemed that galactic rule was humanities manifest destimy.
Untill the cracks began to appear.
Humanity tried, it truly did, but in the end they too were unable to conquer the darkness within, and so brother fought against brother and all that could have been was unmade.

But the universe works in cycles. Empires form, they rise and, inevitaby, they fall.
The time of the Old Ones, the Necrontyr, the Eldar and even of the Humans has passed. The universe is ready to try again with a new species and a new empire.

And maybe they'll get it right this time around.

>> No.25007497

wait how did an eldar thread turn into a tau thread anyway?

>> No.25007510

Jesus Christ, Summer's coming earlier every year, isn't it?

>> No.25007512


Fucking Greatergoodstealers, man...

>> No.25007572

Yeah, man. Failbaddon? 40kids, man.

>> No.25007596

Greatergoodstealers man.
>they give you a pamphlet that alters your DNA. After that any pamphlet you print becomes a greatergoodstealer hybrid. after three editions of hybrid pamphlets you start printing purestrain pamphlets. after that point the only way to contain the spread is by ordering in an exterminatus and praying that your exterminatus requisition forms haven't been compromised.

>> No.25007626

Dude. Do what I do. Pay some ratlings to blow the heads off any Water Cast that gets to a computer.

>> No.25007635

Inquisitor stares at a Greater Good pamphlet. A single tear slides from his eye. He knows why this was sent, and the loyalty of the people of the empire touches him.

It'd touch him a lot more if the maibox wasn't stuffed with the things.

>> No.25007668

no anon you are the summer forever

>> No.25007690


Failaddon is only trotted out by people who have a superficial knowledge of the fluff.

>> No.25007706

>you will never rim an eldar girl until she poops butt-opals into your mouth

>> No.25007773

Throne of terra! They've already infected the postal service? We have to quarentine the entire subsector. Noone gets in, noone gets out, astropathic communication only for the duration of the emergency.
Let us only pray that they haven't infiltrated the sector administratum.

>> No.25007802

It's almost winter down here in Australia. I even saw a cloud in the distance yesterday.

>> No.25007833

I really hate the whole inverted seasons thing in the southern hemisphere. I'm so used to them that whenever your american news talks about things in the summer, I have to remind myself that they're talking about June to August (I think? Probably not the exact duration of the seasons) instead of December to February.

>> No.25007857

Also, eldar can produce offspring with humans

atleast with an eldar father and human mother

also a half eldar is the ultramarine's chief astropath

>> No.25007892

I know that feel too but let's face it, between China, India, Europe, North America and large parts of africa most of the worlds population lives in the northern hemisphere. Frankly on most days we're lucky anyone even remembers that the southern hemisphere exists.

>> No.25007911

Are you implying Nastase isn't the most awesome ultramarine ever?

>> No.25007913

>also a half eldar is the ultramarine's chief astropath

>> No.25007918

I just hate that in every fantasy universe ever south is warm and north is cold.

They're just always set midways up the northern hemisphere, always

>> No.25007959

I kind of wish I knew the story behind this model

>> No.25007973

>arguable deficiency
Orky as fuck

>> No.25007981

>Frankly on most days we're lucky anyone even remembers that the southern hemisphere exists.

I hate to admit this, but I had forgotten until a few days ago. You guys just don't come up that often and it's easy to forget when the temperature reaches triple digits.

>> No.25007988

follow the link to find out

>> No.25007998

They make cute families at that.

>> No.25007999

He's not an ultra.
He's an astropath.

>> No.25008009

No, I've read the writefaggotry, I mean ''I want to know what circumstances lead to one fellow neckbeard to go ''I'm going to make an intricate diorama of some Eldar chick getting raped, then post pics online'' ''

>> No.25008013

>I hate to admit this, but I had forgotten until a few days ago. You guys just don't come up that often and it's easy to forget when the temperature reaches triple digits.

I use the Celsius system, and to me, triple digits means that you'll be literally burned alive. What is that, like 30 or 40 centigrade?

>> No.25008023

Perfectly understandable. Interesting note, ice cream gets more mention in American news papers than Australia does. Probably because ice cream tastes delicious whereas Australia tastes like spiders.

>> No.25008024

100 Fahrenheit would be 37.77 Celsius.

>> No.25008026

I hate how drawfags always go crazy with elf ears.

>> No.25008047

What about elves whose ears are as long as their bodies? They fight using their razor sharp ears instead of swords.

>> No.25008052

Chief Librarian Astropath according to the pic

>> No.25008058

Every now and then we get an article reminding us how you guys live in terror of the wildlife and import costs.

>> No.25008109

Probably boredom, people can do some pretty crazy/horrible things when bored. How crazy/horrible? Look up rat kings.
These things are real, some of them have been preserved in spirits.

>> No.25008210

Knife ears is an insult to them as it implies that their ears aren't long enough for proper combat.

>> No.25008251

What really happens in that Eldar rape diorama is that she grabs the sword she's reaching for and slaughters all the Guardsmen.

>> No.25008387

Yeah, but he's not a marine.

He was too old for the process when he was assigned to the Dark Angels, let alone the Ultra Marines.

>> No.25008527

True but I would consider that any member of the Ultramarines support staff distinguished enough to be allowed to wear power armor and the chapter symbol to be an honorary Ultramarine. Even if they aren't actually astartes.

>> No.25008549

gah! sorry about the poor sentence structure, it's late and i'm tired.

>> No.25008618

Fair enough, that also includes the Navigator, who had to get specially made power armour since he's a mutant freak.

>> No.25008691


>> No.25008709

Well Space Wolves give their navigators an honor guard so I'd say Ultramarines allowing their navigators to be honorary Ultramarines seems reasonable.

>> No.25008890


A slave race created by the old ones, later rendered obsolete by their successors, the Krork

>> No.25009308

Context for pic, please.

>> No.25009373

Sure, unless you can come up with a better explanation for why so many people ar never heard from again.

>> No.25009387


It's in this thread, you git.


>> No.25009394

She does stuff like that from time to time. Not sure why, but she's good at it.

>> No.25009400

Later my ass.

The Eldar kicked the Necrons butt to their Tombs. What did the Krok do? Nothing. They aren't even mentioned because they aren't that important.

>> No.25009423

>rape fantasy
I like it

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