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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.24909579 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

In celebration of my first tattoo, Προμηθεύς (Prometheus), I propose a HFY thread.

>> No.24909656

200,000 years of modern humanity and we've just barely made it to the moon, are wrecking our ecosystem, and use an economy based on boom-and-bust cycles.

Oh yeah, go humanity. Wooo.

>> No.24909667

Here's something I picked up over on Space Battles awhile back.

Our first contact was with a race of aquatics, they call themselves Mlgmgn. We can hum their language, but it always transliterates into a string of consonants. In English they are the Melgogen.

They are considered the best farmers in this part of the galaxy, they can cultivate entire oceans and export the fish to everybody that shares our biochemisty. They are so good at it that many civilizations are willing to share a planet with them, letting them have all the oceans. Once we realized just how contested garden worlds like ours are, we struck the same deal for a protectorate status.

They didn't just hand over technologies, but let us have what helped them the best. They didn't just give us fusion or space flight. Once they realized just how big our fission bomb stock pile was, they gave fallout-free pure fusion bombs to anyone who would clear up their stockpiles. The Melgogen certainly didn't expect what came next. The United States turned over their uranium bomb stock pile, started fusion bomb production, and dusted off the Orion project in under a year. Once US started building a moon dome, everybody but N. Korea traded dirty nukes fore fallout free fusion bomb technology.


>> No.24909685

Xenos-lover plz go

>> No.24909705

The Melgogen were quite surprised at nuclear pulse propulsion. What nobody else would consider possible until their sciences had already surpassed the fusion torch, we have made practical before we had the clean fusion to use it. Our first colonies on the moon and in orbital habitats were purely solar powered, it took us most of the decade to turn pure fusion bombs into sustained fusion powerplants. Until then the Melgogen were quite happy selling us electricity. That was when our industry really started to grow, as we could send habitats into the asteroid belt and Saturn's rings to mine continuously. In those days the habitats used solar sails and a few pusher plates for maneuvering, but the Melgogen were actually impressed that we could move something at over a dozen kilometers.

It was three decades after First contact when we asked the Melgogen for FTL. By then 3 billion out of 11 of us were living off planet. They waffled a bit before selling us some text books that showed the principles of a few FTL different forms of FTL that were non competitive. The Melgogen did something that resonated with water, but no else has been able to pry it from them.

All of the FTL technologies were impractical. Some had a finite maximum size. Most had a power requirement per unit volume that exceeded that of our fusion reactors by multiple orders of magnitude. It took as five years just to go through the books before we could find one that we could run with. Finally a graduate student at Purdue university found our answer. The Engine was fairly energy efficient, but required exotic particles on start-up and shut down which just don't exist outside of a nova. He did the math and figured we could generate enough of the particles by running some iron through a particle accelerator thirty kilometers in diameter.


>> No.24909728

Thirty six years after first contact we sent our first FTL vessel, a retrofitted mining habitat with a solar sail, fusion torches, and pusher plates. The FTL engine was actually built into the solar sail, which has set the pattern for our ships ever since. It took a most of the day to get to Alpha Centauri. The Melgogen said that there was nothing of interest there, so we considered it safe enough for a test. We found two suns, a gas giant in a cometary orbit and more asteroids than you can shake a stick at. It was perfect for mining as far as we were concerned. Our astronomers figured that the gas giant was captured a few dozen milenia ago and would stick around about as long.

It was fifty thee years after first contact when we decided that we were ready for open trade. We had about twenty billion spread about twelve systems that the Melgogan told us were uninteresting, and had an economy that processed cubic kilometers of material every month. When we started trading with other races we found we actually had one of the strongest economies in the area because we strip mined so many asteroids.

Pirates left us alone since we didn't have a ship under thirty kilometers in every direction. We started off with raw resources, jump in a factory city with billions of tons in its holds, sell them as much refined ores as they want and jump out. After they stopped getting really jumpy when our oversize ships jumped in, we sold an asteroid towing services as well. Our boat frames, space craft frames too small for our FTL, also became fairly popular for our reliable designs. over the next few decades we collected quite a few material technologies by building ships for other races. Every one was much more trusting when once they realized we didn't want their planets any more than they wanted our asteroid fields.

>> No.24909758

>In celebration of my tattoo devoted to a story wherein humanity was a useless little shit who whined at every given opportunity to the man leading them to literal enlightenment, lets have a thread devoted to humanity acting like complete dicks and solving things on their own!

>> No.24909776

>fallout-free pure fusion

Someone needs to read up a bit on the effects of neutron radiation.

>> No.24909825

pretty good. its nice to see some OC hfy stories

>> No.24909886

...nigga what? Prometheus gave man the literal (and figurative) fire, shaped us in the image of the gods, and was one of the few gods of antiquity that actually gave two shits about humanity.

>> No.24909891

>humanity is the only species smart enough to mine asteroids
>nobody else ever thought that big metal rocks in space could contain metal

>> No.24909926

I imagine itd be more trouble for aquatic species to that terrestrial

>> No.24909935

He also led us out of the cave that the gods had crammed humanity into. Which is what I was saying. Prometheus basically held the hand of humanity and dragged us kicking and screaming into enlightenment, so a thread where humans are a dick to everything, rape planets, and never get help from anyone is kinda contradictory to celebrating the guy.

>> No.24909939

>> No.24909955

From what I remember of the thread, it wasn't so much that nobody else ever mined asteroids. It's just that nobody ever did it on anything close to the same scale as us

>> No.24909960

>> No.24910007

The beauty of humanity is the ability to go "fuck it" and set fire to an entire forest to smoke those fugitives out. We get things done, and we may be the precursor race in the galaxy.

>> No.24910025

its all a matter of perspective. you see it as planet rape, I see it as creating the means to produce more human souls. I bet you don't like 40k either.

>> No.24910028

More of this concept please. Nature is sort of the ur-asshole and has fought humanity every goddamn step of the way to where we are now, and we're still not free.

>> No.24910040

>> No.24910042

>precursor race
good, fucking god, man, I feel sorry for the races who come after us

"hey, I wonder what this does"
>It's a nuke

>> No.24910057

How is that any different than another race being a precursor race?

"hey, I wonder what this does"
>It blows up the sun

>> No.24910069

Oh, you like 40. No fucking wonder.

>> No.24910085

Not all forms of Nuclear Fusion produce neutron radiation, for example Helium-3 fusion.

>> No.24910104

worst kind of HFY

can somebody recount the story of the legendary "Level with me."?

>> No.24910117


Can you chill out? I want to enjoy humanity in piece and your oh-so edgy pessimism is stopping me.

>> No.24910119

>find human superweapon

wonder what this red botton does?

DONT TOUCH IT YOU FOOL! dont you know the old ones where psychopathic airbreathers?

>> No.24910126

>hurr we are speshul because we cock things up and our planet sucks! Check your privilege, xenos scum!
Great, humanity is the equivalent of tumblr

>> No.24910141

>> No.24910143

every HFY thread has someone like him in it. someone who isnt smart enought to use the hide button.

also fuck grammer idc if mine is screwy

>> No.24910157

You can like it all you want, but being a selfish cunt and bragging about it is in no way living up to the memory of the guy who got his liver pecked out daily just to give a bunch of shmucks a campfire.

>> No.24910161


> Precursor race

"And lo, this great temple shows the great many forms that our lords took shape, they dances they performed to create us today.
> Its an old porn shop.

>> No.24910213

my god the bdsm section must be their inspiration for hell

>> No.24910218

Sorry that some of us want to become pastorialists and farmers, instead of going "hnng. No more mammoth. We go to next valley, more mammoth there. No next valley? hnng. Look for moon mammoth."

>> No.24910242

Watch yourself mate, don't wanna cut yourself on that edge

>> No.24910249

then right a story about it or stfu. btw I am not op but you bother me.

>> No.24910259

right/write damn auto correct

>> No.24910261


What are you even talking about? Are you complaining about the content of this thread, or the idea of HFY threads in general?

>> No.24910290

anyone have anny about humans coming to the rescue? like the one where human pirates stopped raiding the other civilizations to send aid to them during a war? then picked up raiding them after war ended?

>> No.24910294

>precursor race

these phallic objects represented the legendary human fertility

>> No.24910304

I think I did, once, about easter islanders taking over the world because they were so tough, since they cut down all the trees and smashed all the bird eggs on their island.

>> No.24910317

your tattoo is stupid and so are HFY threads, barring a few stories where it isnt us being barbaric morons.

>> No.24910348

Not the idea about it in general. Hell, I love Traveller Interstellar Wars, and that's HFY as anything (except that the "aliens" are genetically human). I just get pissed off at the people who apparently think the reason the british empire collapsed is they stopped shitting in their drinking water

>> No.24910352

THIS. In the meantime, one of my personal favorites.

>> No.24910383

>That Guy

Jesus Christ, came here for a nice HFY thread, and get you asspained autists arguing hurr humanity deserves to die bullshit.

>> No.24910400

>they dry hump each other to worship us

>> No.24910410


>> No.24910418

Ever read Dinosaurs?
That was a great story of humans as the ancient enigmatic alien race.

>> No.24910442

if it helps the one Im thinking of ends with the aliens asking who the other aliens think they will side with in an upcoming war.

>> No.24910454

dinosaurs by who?

>> No.24910464


I only got one response for reptoscum.

>> No.24910495

>> No.24910511

1984 by George Orwell - is it a HFY? Because the proles aren't really human, they're like chavs or trailer trash.

>> No.24910516

Walter Jon Williams.

>> No.24910532

>cite the worst and most destructive aspects of humanity as proof of its "greatness"

All of you, kill yourselves. Just...god, I hate you all so much.

>> No.24910544

There are no dinosaurs.
The "dinosaurs" are the ancient humans.

>> No.24910555

Someone mad a youtube version.
It's... chilling.

>> No.24910560

Define "worst".

>> No.24910564

goddamn, im gonna have to get some stitches from that one.

>> No.24910574

say what you want, the worst aspects as you call them are quiet often extremely useful. why do you think we train soldiers to fight and kill? because its useful

why do we make nukes when we already have enough to killeveryone on earth? because humans are paranoid and if we dont someone else will.

why do we fight wars against each other all the time? because we cant get along.

basically humanity lives by the slogan carry a big stick. you dont like it get religion and go die so you can try again later.

>> No.24910704


You have such a fucking skewed version of man.

Mankind is not and never will be about a singular concept. We are a collection of concepts and the destructive ones are not the most shining aspects.

Mankind almost totally destroyed itself a mere twenty years after we invented the Atomic Bomb with the Cuban Missile Crisis. We also renovated the whole of our society in a period of a century or so with the Industrial Revolution.

Humanity is amazing, but not for the reasons you find it.

>> No.24910724

Why not?

>> No.24910756

I know humanity is amazing, I can just appreciate the values which you cant seem to understand.

>> No.24910759

don't bother with him, the best you can do is hide his comments.

>> No.24910778

Too many 40Kids in this thread. All the unsaid Fortheemprah! hovering in the background noise. Such a waste.

>> No.24910782

see, THATS cool. not the ones hurrr we pollute the air and cut down all the trees cause we are too hardcore for the planet

>> No.24910807

the values of pointless short sightedness and idiocy?

>> No.24910825

name one thing that we have today that didnt first get developed for war.

>> No.24910829


>> No.24910842

The lightbulb. There's literally tons of shit. Gunpowder is one of them funnily enough.

>> No.24910847

cable TV.
the stove.

>> No.24910848

windshield wipers.

>> No.24910854

Pizza. And pizza will be around forever.

>> No.24910857

computers (First ones were not meant for war.)

Thats just off the top of my head, but two pretty important discoveries.

>> No.24910861


>> No.24910863

I imagine you are in a house right now. probably in America, but I could be wrong, doesn't really matter. at one point in time, that land belonged to someone else. doesn't matter if it was the british empire or the American Indians. but you wouldn't be there if they hadn't fought for it, spilt blood for it either taking or defending it.

>> No.24910865

wow look at that sonny, you got owned.

>> No.24910870

Dynamite. Cars. Porn.

>> No.24910874

The telephone.

>> No.24910881

Fertilizers. Antibiotics. The car. The airplane.

>> No.24910883


The automobile, the dog, the printing press, and the motherfucking whole of the modern electrical system we use.

You idiots seem to think man is by nature, warlike. This is no more true than saying man is intrinsically peaceful.

>> No.24910884

im OP, but that's a pretty stupid statement

>> No.24910887

granted on tacos, but every other one on there was used in war. or developed to help in war, cable tv was brought about with technology used to make weapons, the stove was at first just fire which we used to kill since we learnedd to use it. windshield wipers (honestly?) where always used on war vehicles.

>> No.24910897

I'd be somewhere else. I don't consider that all that terrible.

>> No.24910903

never said there wernt things worth fighting for. but half of the HFY things are about how awesome we are because our planet is polluted and our ecosystems are fucked

>> No.24910906

Hydroelectric power.
Peanut butter.
Jump rope.
Spears, axes, and bows were for hunting before they were used for war.
Fishing nets

>> No.24910919

granted, I meant name something that hasnt been implemented for war but screwed up. still, almost all the TECHNOLOGY today was developed for war or using grants from the military. we develop for war and adapt it for nonwartime uses.

>> No.24910924

Being used in war is different from being developed for war. We use oxygen during wars, so by your logic oxygen was "developed for war."

>> No.24910929

What the fuck are you attempting to argue here? That because something has been used in war it's bad?

Gunpowder was not "developed" for war it was created by Chinese alchemists and used for centuries in fireworks before it was ever used to actively kill.

>> No.24910938

I feel myself losing IQ points reading this. Reread the post that started this dumbass.

>developed FOR war

>> No.24910940

actually no all hfy is NOT about that, only some of it is. you want to focus on that part and shit up a good thread.

>> No.24910942

except you said examples of things developed for war. not things used in wars. and all of the things on that list were not made for war.

>> No.24910944

Used for is not the same as made for.

Or you do really believe in cave man seting each other on fire as a mean of war?

>> No.24910963

no Im arguing that even the things we use exclusively to kill are can be good. I cant stand how somebody wants to say humans arent warlike is all.

>> No.24910968

Only you're wrong. Are things modified for use in wartime? Sure. Same as they're constantly being modified and refined in peace time.

Was isn't what refines technology. Time does. Wartime or peacetime, we improve things. We tinker with them. We make new things to replace old things. Etc. Humanity doesn't just do that for war, it does that all the time.

>> No.24910970

i want the opposite friend, i want to encourage the cool ones where humans do cool shit, not the ones where we brag about being barbarians.

>> No.24910988

I like the part where everyone stopped posting HFY.

That was my favorite part of the thread.

>> No.24910995

When are humans ever space barbarians?
I actually find that pretty much unique to HFY.

>> No.24910996

so, going to try and rectify this thread. You are all welcome.

>> No.24911006

Wartime is generally perceived as a time of great duress with incredibly high stakes. It can be tough to think that some of the most important scientific advances in human were born in the throes of war. But if war (ideally) is the ultimate expression of necessity, and necessity is the mother of invention, this point may find greater traction. Historically, in times of war, production goes up, spending goes down, the nation is mobilized and focused toward progress and supportive of innovation. What does than mean? Consider the list below and decide for yourself.
1. Atomic Energy – Absurdly efficient energy source capable of powering (or obliterating ) a large city. Used widely throughout the world. WWII

2. Anesthesia – the use of Chloroform began in the Civil War to aid Battlefield Surgeons efforts to cleanly and humanely process the injured soldiers. Shortly thereafter the movement began to gain traction in the private sector, improving medical care by cleaner surgeries and fewer infections. US Civil War.

3. Computer – We live in a wired society. Computers are part of the fabric of our daily lives at work, in the car or at home. Originally conceived and designed during WWII as a code breaking aid. WWII

4. Internet – Conceived and designed in the late 1970’s during the height of the cold war as a defense against nuclear war. The thought was that if vital government information could be stored in a virtual environment, it would be impossible to take out communications at one location. The effect of this advancement is obvious to anyone reading this. Cold War

>> No.24911011

Well that wasn't really the point of that conversation but you're probably correct.

Granted, we have no other sentient species to compare ourselves too so it's impossible say how "warlike" we really are. I think a good point is that war is almost always waged for purposes beyond the perpetuation of war.

>> No.24911014

> story celebrates humans triumphing over nature
> brag about being barbarians
This is what liberals actually think.

>> No.24911016

5. Satellite Technology – The “Space Race” fueled by the underlying Cold War gave rise to an invention that facilitated better, safer, and more meaningful intelligence gathering activities. Modern day commercial applications have expanded to include the advent of GPS, and of course cable television and wireless internet. Cold War

6. Penicillin – Discovered around the turn of the 20th century, this simple drug which came to prominence during WWII has saved Billions of lives from previously deadly bacterial infections. WWI and WWII

7. Rubber – As the Allied forces scrambled to produce the equipment that would facilitate victory against the Axis powers, a major breakthrough came with the invention of synthetic rubber. Prior to this rubber was harvested via “rubber trees” in the South Pacific and Latin/South America. The invention allowed commercial ventures to explode and grow the American economy to the world’s leading economic power. The most obvious application? Automobile tires. WWII

8. Jet Engine – Aeronautic technologies were able to “take off” in WWII & the Korean War Conflict with the invention of higher octane, more efficient super fuels, stronger and lighter engines and advances in aerodynamic engineering. Howard Hughes, the filmmaker, billionaire industrialist and international playboy pioneered many technologies which ensured unrivaled American Air superiority to this very day. WWII & Korean Conflict

9. Submarine – Incredibly, while the notion of maritime submersible vehicles have been “floating” around since the early 1600’s, the first rudimentary (yet viable) submarine was launched in 1775. American Revolutionary War

10. Pepto Bismol – Pink Bismuth may not mean much to most, but for those of us this summer who suffer with the occasional post-hot dog heartburn this is a lifesaver. Originally conceived during WWII, this product was introduced commercially directly after the war.

>> No.24911027

>> No.24911037

>> No.24911042


Here you go.

>Apparently there's a short story out there where Humans finally enter the galactic community. Every new space-traveling species is expected to add some kind of unique contribution to the community. Humans? Contributed popsicles.

>> No.24911057

good, keep posting those. sadly i have none.

>> No.24911080


Anyone have the sequel to this one?

>> No.24911086

the concept of triumph over nature is retarded, so we fuck up where we live and instead of maybe not being idiots we just build stuff to replace it? fuck that

>> No.24911090

>> No.24911096

>Dynamite. Cars. Porn.
Mr. Torgue pls go. This is by far the best list, though.

>> No.24911117

either contribute or get the fuck out.

>> No.24911120


>> No.24911123

I think you ought to have said: name one thing that wasn't affected, and made possible by the weapons of war. the answer to that question is what has been invented in a time of relative peace, and hasn't been used in some way as a weapon: the answer to that is damn near nothing but drinking instruments, and even they could be used in a pinch in a camp hospital.

>> No.24911124

>6. Penicillin – Discovered around the turn of the 20th century, this simple drug which came to prominence during WWII has saved Billions of lives from previously deadly bacterial infections. WWI and WWII

Youre confusing "Beginning of mass production." With "Discovered."

>> No.24911126

>the things we use exclusively to kill are can be good
If we are using them for things other than killing, than they are not being used EXCLUSIVELY to kill, dipshit.

>> No.24911139

>only most of it is

>> No.24911163

By your logic, the frying pan was created exclusively for war since someone somewhere has killed someone else with a frying pan.

Conversely, this also means that vacuum cleaners were created exclusively for sucking on your dick since someone has done that before, too.

>> No.24911170

The idea of wiping out an entire alien race over a simple misunderstanding is barbaric as fuck.

>> No.24911198

>Originally conceived and designed during WWII as a code breaking aid. WWII
Actually, the personal computer was developed much later in a garage and the original computer was developed in ancient Greece, also known as the abacus.

>> No.24911205

And yet its almost commonplace in human history.

>> No.24911213

Everyone knows those crazy greeks only devised the abacus to count the number of dead Persians after a battle.

>> No.24911225

While the dude arguing that "everything is developed for war first!" is retarded, its true that we wouldnt have many of the things we have today if it wasnt for wars and the funds we pour into its research.

Theres no other field of research that would grant you tons and tons of money to TRY to build something that can walk on uneven surfaces/walls or become invisible.

>> No.24911226

>Satellite Technology
Nobody argued this, though it could be argued that satellite and space technology all came from the desire to NOT fight in a war and instead compete and assert dominance through works of science and discovery.
>Jet Engine
Not an airplane, just an engine.
Confusing rubber with synthetic rubber.

>> No.24911236

No, we usually mean to wipe people out when we perform an ethnic cleansing.

>> No.24911237

I'm fond of this one.

>> No.24911243

More like the number of whores Secundus went through in a night.

>> No.24911246


>> No.24911249

> implying what it is over matters
Wiping out an entire alien race is a good thing by default. Aliens are not human, and if you don't destroy them, then you are denying actual human beings the benefits of all the resources that those aliens possess. By not destroying them, you are killing human beings for the sake of aliens. There is a word for that, it's "traitor."

>> No.24911254


>> No.24911272

>Howard Hughes

mah nigga

>> No.24911277

I didn't know we wiped out any alien races. Damn, I really need to catch up on my history.

>> No.24911284

We did the human genome project without a war-related application in mind.

>> No.24911296

I said almost. whenever we find a place we want we tend to screw the indigenous people over pretty badly to get it.

talking about other humans here man, give me a little leeway.

>> No.24911316

IM pretty sure that someone has something in mind for it, id would be foolish not to.

>> No.24911324

I dont see you out killing blacks and asians in order to protect the resources of the white man, anon. By not killing every black and asian individual you see, you are killing white men for the sake of the impure.

If you aren't practicing what you preach, you are nothing more than a limp-dicked hypocrite.

>> No.24911333

fuck you, you dont know if i did or didnt. shit i might not even be the person you linked to.

>> No.24911335

1969 was a crazy year.

>> No.24911344


First artificial heart was made to save a life.

Basically, inventor's buddy was gonna die because his heart sucked. His solution? Make him a new heart.

>Are there any inventions that we made "simply because we could"? I can't think of any off the top of my head.

>> No.24911359

Of those, about only 10.000 count.
We did spend an ungodly amount of time aping around but once we managed to set up shop, we boosted up.

>> No.24911366

Large Hadron Collider
>this might destroy the universe, or maybe piss off God, hell if we know
>Fire her up, boys!

>> No.24911379

I like how you see races. We should hang out. CLEANSE THE BLOODLINES!

>> No.24911398

> image
Well then it's not humanity's first military victory, because our species didn't win it. Whatever bug the aliens were running from one it.

Which would be hilarious when you think about it.
> First Earth species to win an interstellar war?
> Not humans.
> Bees.

>> No.24911421

bees are ok man, its wasps you got to worry about. fuckers sting you just to be stinging you and KEEP ON stinging you.

>> No.24911432

Goddamn bees, stealing our thunder.

>> No.24911442

I thought it was cockroaches. These death beetles just so happening to be cockroaches in everything but name would be pretty hilarious.

>> No.24911443

I believe you got bees mixed up with wasps anon.

>> No.24911451

The first Earth victory is won not by humans, but by the continent of Australia.

>> No.24911457

You first, faggot, so put your money where your fucking mouth is and kill everyone different from you.

>> No.24911469

And then we weaponized Australia.

>> No.24911482

I'm trying but I got fucked up arms, man.

>> No.24911495

Then you are impure and should kill yourself, traitor.

>> No.24911500

I wish all the gaia loving fags would leave.
People don't shit up your earth-loving threads over at /an/ so don't shit up ours.

Sheesh, it's like people forget how to be civic, these days.

>> No.24911511

I assure you, my bloodlines are pure. Family breeding all the way.

>> No.24911528

I prefer hyundai, I assure you.

>> No.24911533

faggots faggoting faggots up in this faggot filled labrynth of faggotude.

>> No.24911537

>Sheesh, it's like people forget how to be civic
Whenever I forget how to be a car, I just watch the Utena movie again.

>> No.24911548

Apparently wanting to avoid this makes me a "gaia loving fag."

>> No.24911564

>that picture

>> No.24911572

What a faggot. I bet you don't even drink gasoline.

>> No.24911578

wanting to say humans cant fight wars and bawwing about aliens getting hurt and the planet getting hurt makes you a gaia loving faggot

>> No.24911579

> implying that isn't the result of state control
> the same state control that envirofags want

>> No.24911602

>One bad thing instantly invalidates everything else.

>> No.24911618

you fucking idiot, no one is trying to shit up the thread, most of us fucking like it. but fucking up the planet because you need more fucking cars is retarded.

>> No.24911621

oh boy, here we gooooooooo!!!!!

>> No.24911652

Attack the argument, not the argue-er.

>> No.24911656

> wanting to say humans cant fight wars
No one says this. At most, people have been saying that we've been too quick to fight wars for horrible reasons.

> bawwing about aliens getting hurt
The main objection here has been to the idea that being quick to exterminate others for again rather poor reasons is not something to celebrate.

> and the planet getting hurt
We live on this planet. If bad things happen to it, bad things happen to us.

>> No.24911666

Oh, right.
As if HUMANITY couldn't keep up the "FUCK YEAH" part of space exploration and expansion while not advancing towards other - cleaner - types of energy.

Come on! Just stop trying to hide your intentions, here.
You're just full of self-loathing.

>> No.24911677

Fuck your face, I just want to make jokes about turning into cars.

>> No.24911684


>> No.24911689

that would be awesome and exactly everyone would love things like that, mr satan.

>> No.24911692

>The main objection here has been to the idea that being quick to exterminate others for again rather poor reasons is not something to celebrate.

generally we are exterminating them for something they have done. like blowing up a colony. hell a human got other hums to blow up two buildings and 12 years later we are still killing his people. its how people are in reality.

>> No.24911693

No. Just that is is a bad thing. Not something to be all proud of. Not something to trumpet as a great strength of humanity.

What is in that picture is the result of human beings making some pretty serious mistakes. Mistakes that we should recognize and learn from instead of scrambling to pretend that it was our plan all along to avoid confronting our own fallibility.

>> No.24911695

"More cars" isn't wrong by itself. What we need is "More CLEAN cars".
If you think we can't do it without fucking up the planet then, ha-hah!

>> No.24911701

This guy >>24911249 straight up said kill everything remotely different from you.

>> No.24911705

>People saying humanity is good.
>People saying humanity is bad.

In comparison to what?

This is like arguing whether our universe is good or bad.

>> No.24911720


Speaking of bees...

>> No.24911722

I don't think anyone has been saying that humanity is bad, just that humanity is capable of making mistakes, as is mentioned here >>24911693

>> No.24911727

That's exactly the issue. People that say that Humans are instantly awful and BAD are assuming that the Aliens would be better at it.

They're just as bad as the non-sensical writefags that write cheesy HFY without any sort of catch.

>> No.24911732

exactly, that would be awesome. lets have HFY's where we still expand and be badass, but we also dont fuck up everywhere we go like a bunch of locusts.

>> No.24911738

> humanity is capable of making mistakes

>> No.24911741

Ok. But that's not the point of this thread and nobody has been trumpeting it as a great strength of humanity.

>> No.24911746

>People that say that Humans are instantly awful and BAD are assuming that the Aliens would be better at it.
Nobody is saying that, though. Theyre just saying that making humans into the ultimate mary sues such that even our failings make us superior makes for shitty narrative.

>> No.24911767


Read this:

>> No.24911770

Oh, no! The Gaia loving tyrants are going to force me to lay down and die in the name of Mother Earth and the Whales and the Bees and the little flowers, noooooo!

Admit it, gaiafag, if you could you'd force humans to live by your petty and self-serving standards.
If you did that, what'd make you any different from an absolutist king?

>> No.24911773

>nobody has been trumpeting it as a great strength of humanity.
see >>24909579

>> No.24911790

And how about everybody else?

>> No.24911792

Except, you know, the OP.

>> No.24911801

So what if in some fiction, the Human race are THAT badass and dangerous?
Sure, it's childish but it's not as if there's no counterpoint where Humanity is weak and frail and incapable of competing in any regard.

Read Lovecraft, man. It's the opposite of HFY. And it's LOVED worldwide.

God, it's as if we HAVE to hate ourselves and any "achievements", fictional or not, we attain.

>> No.24911802

Do you know how goddamn annoying it is when authors name their book something so generic that it's impossible to find.

>> No.24911814

Even Cthulu had a weakness, anon.

>> No.24911822

"Dinosaurs Walter Jon Williams"

>> No.24911831

better yet the weakness was a boat to the head.

granted that only stopped him long enough for his head to reform.

>> No.24911838

It's not that "we" hate "ourselves."
It's that we're a bunch of individuals. A bunch of individuals who hate each other.
The entire zombie apocalypse genre is incredibly popular because there's a large number of people who absolutely despise the rest of human society and want to see them all die horribly.

>> No.24911861

heh! imho, those're the real manchildren that are to be despised. it's agreeable, right?

>> No.24911872

>The entire zombie apocalypse genre is incredibly popular because there's a large number of people who absolutely despise the rest of human society and want a guilt-free reason to kill them all horribly.

>> No.24911884

And HFY is the guilt-free jingoist equivalent to zombies.

>> No.24911905

So if one loves both zombies and HFY.....what does it mean?

>> No.24911935


Nope. You're confusing "Living in harmony with mother earth man" with "Not killing ourselves through stupidity".

The key point in the China event is that given their continued actions they will doom themselves. This point is entirely absent in the other instances you showed unless you can somehow convincingly show me that the humans action will somehow result in their downfall. The key point of the HFY stories is that they aren't bound by bullshit idealisms "Earth is a living being!" they approach it rationally.

>> No.24911936

Extreme narcissism.

>> No.24911940

It means that the person likes HFY and zombies.

>> No.24911965

But the whole "hate plague" thing like The Crazies or The Crossed has pretty much replaced zombies in terms of popularity.

>> No.24911967

This nigga right here.
This man.

>> No.24911991


Y'know nobody ACTUALLY thinks that HFY threads are a model for future human development, right?

Or at least I always took it as a thought experiment kind of thing. Write something from the "Asshole Imperialist" point of view and try to make it such that you can actually in some way relate to it.

The ones where humans are self-sacrificing are neat, though it's weird that it seems like the idea is that other races come to know us for it. I mean self-sacrifice does happen but unless it's a concept entirely unknown to every other race in the galaxy I wouldn't think it would crop up often enough to be a defining characteristic in their eyes.

Nobody really feels like making humans the smartest race in the galaxy, but they'll sometimes go for a whole "Human Intuition/Creativity" thing that somehow lets us do things technologically that nobody else though of. Kinda' a cop-out if you ask me.

The only HFY that I've ever really liked a lot was the veil of madness one. Everyone thought of humans as fucking terrifying reavers when really they were just the only people who could live in a certain region of space without going insane. Humans leveraged the whole thing a bit and lived well but weren't really assholes.

>> No.24912002

come on, you're just rusing by now.

>> No.24912032

> they approach it rationally.

Right, because this >>24911249 sort of things is "rational."

People seem to confuse "egotistical" and "rational" a lot.

>> No.24912050

> Y'know nobody ACTUALLY thinks that HFY threads are a model for future human development, right?

Except for the HFY fans who want it to be.

>> No.24912056

Does one person's statement invalidate the entire genre's worth?

>> No.24912068

What? I wasn't even discussing that.

>> No.24912078

So, gentlemen, what kind of HFY YOU like?

>> No.24912087

Thank you anon, I try. We all benefit through discussion.

>> No.24912111

If it is the general undertone of the entire genre, yes.

>> No.24912120

>the races who come after us

There will be no races after us. We are the Before. We Are. And we are the Forever.

>> No.24912126

It's during these discussions that I think how interesting it is that each of us is his/her own person, with his/her own way of being and his/her own history and life.
God. I wish I could just ask you guys out for a cup of coffee/tea/beverage and discuss these things face to face.
It'd be interesting to get to know all of you.

>> No.24912127

I've never seen a better example of such an amazing story ruined by a VA.

>> No.24912157

The kind where we're not inherently physicly or mentally superior to other sentient species, but the ones where we're just some crazy motherfuckers willing to try anything once and highfive Death when we pass him in the hallway.

>> No.24912161


I like the ones where Humans are bros.

I also like the ones where Humans win/succeed due to some really ass-backwards thinking that seems complete genius in hindsight.

I also enjoy ones that portray Human(s) fucking around and being trolls and/or bros.

>> No.24912190

I do this in public all the time, imagining how truly human we all are. I think it's interesting that we spend a lot of time dehumanizing one another.

>> No.24912211

>I also like the ones where Humans win/succeed due to some really ass-backwards thinking that seems complete genius in hindsight.

Hell, I like the sound of that too.

>> No.24912212

it actually would, and there would probably be much less animocity. we have all seen things we hate on here, someone say something so stupid you just start shaking, and seeing as we are all anonymous somewhere in the back of your mind we all think "this is that motherfucker"

>> No.24912243

It's kinda hardcoded into us, sadly.

>> No.24912247

I like us being crazy psychopaths of the universe

I like us being clever

I like us being warriors who are better than everyone else.

I like it when humanity is the best of te best for no reason other than being human.

I like it when humans are huge trolls on everyone.

I like the ones where humans are the great warriors of the universe.

pretty much all I dont like is when humans are wimpy pathetic whiny pussies that so man ypeople in this thread want.

>> No.24912252

the ones where we do noble shit that other species dont consider. like sacrificing themselves or showing mercy on defeated folks. like that one with the gwin or whatever they are called

>> No.24912290

I've always taken it that most of the people who go "Rape the earth kill every other alien fuck year!" are just fucking around and rolling with a theme. I mean come on the thread picture depicts a character designed to be a villain as a hero.

Maybe I'm wrong, I dunno.

>> No.24912298

Yeah, but.
Imagine a campus, right? A calm one. We could just get together to discuss fiction and math for our systems, tinker with rules, spend some time at the bar discussing this kind of fictional dilemmas over a drink.

It'd be interesting

>> No.24912306

oh, come on. You can do better than that.

>> No.24912318

Fuck that.

I'd rather we just gather in some underground basement and beat each other up. 'Fight Club'-style.

>> No.24912327

Would we get visits from the local /k/ armory or the /d/ porn shop?

>> No.24912336

that would be awesome and i would suggest a place if i A) didnt live in the middle of nowhere and b) was one year older and could drink

>> No.24912338

For now, yes. We're pretty flexible I think, the vast majority being nurture rather than nature. And even then we're getting close to making the nature whatever we want.

>> No.24912342


>Implying they're two distinct entities.
>Implying there's a board that isn't a little /d/
>Implying we all aren't a little /d/ inside
>Goddamnit 4chan look what you did to me

>> No.24912354

Im serious, I actually like not hearing someone say humans should be destroyed because of how weak we are, its nice to be the big dog in the universe once in a while.

>> No.24912357

Fund some robotics, advance technology to the point where poverty is meaningless.

We'll get there, maybe.

>> No.24912359


The belief that war is somehow required for technological advancement, which has been expressed in this thread, is something that will result in the downfall of humanity if it remains prominent. As our ability to destroy each other increases, war becomes a larger and larger risk. If people insist on taking that risk more often than is actually necessary out of the mistaken belief that it is a fundamental requirement for advancement, then eventually humanity will destroy itself.

Being too willing to kill for flimsy or outright flawed reasons will result in humanity killing itself unless we can grow beyond that.

Being unable to admit that what we are doing might be wrong is another potentially self-destructive behavior. If a person or group of people is doing something harmful to itself, yet hides from that realization and pretends that the harm is in fact good for it, then it will continue harming itself. If it is unable to break free from that need to feel good about itself, then its mistakes will accumulate, until eventually it harms itself so severely that it dies.

Being unable to admit that we have made mistakes will result in humanity killing itself unless we can grow beyond that.

If anything, the mindless acceptance of the idea that humans will inevitably triumph is the real bullshit idealism here. It would be very easy for humanity to fail. It would be very easy for humanity to die. That is why we must be careful, because there are any number of ways that we could end up destroying ourselves.

>> No.24912375

>Tfw /d/ is your main board.

>> No.24912400

you can fight instinct, but you cannot win. Even in future, we will lump into convenient groups. Maybe without even noticing it.
Thats sort of depressing, but that's how it just is.
"Our dudes" and 'them" are a thing to stay.

>> No.24912423


Why not both?

A perfectly calm campus could easily have a dingy basement. Just watch out for that door marked /d/. That guy, well he's Sally now, was never really the same after he accidentally went in there.

>> No.24912429

At least until we all turn into LCL goo.

>> No.24912431

>everyone must like what I like


>> No.24912437

how? they hardly talk. you cant mastubate THAT much anon, your dick skin would come off silly!

>> No.24912442

> to the point where poverty is meaningless.
Having worked with the poor, this is a lot harder than a lot of people think. Advancements on the cutting edge have a way of staying amongst those with wealth, power, and connections. We talk a lot about revolutionary advancements, but it is the refinement of old ideas into something that can be made widely available that will solve poverty.

And by old ideas, I mean basic stuff. Ideas like having a roof over your head, clean drinking water, access to medicine that actually does more good than harm, that sort of thing.

>> No.24912443


>> No.24912455

That's a pretty wide swing, no? And i dunno what you're reading, but i encountered
>humans should be destroyed because of how weak we are
once or twice, with every time it being the villain.
Turning humanity itself into a villain is a pretty shitty solution to non-existing problem.

>> No.24912460

There's always a discussion thread or two roaming about. I don't spend that much time on 4chan as is.

>> No.24912466

>Implying implications

>> No.24912469

Sometimes I pull on it so hard, I rip the skin.

>> No.24912478

I agree which is why I dont like how people try to make humanity actually being awesome just by being humans out to be some form of sick depravity.

>> No.24912495

It's not an issue of like.
It's an issue of "we really need to realize that we're fallible, or we're all going to die."

Claiming after the fact that our mistakes were really all just as planned doesn't make the harm they cause magically go away.

>> No.24912506

Why? What insurmountable obstacle is there?

>> No.24912522

That's not what we were discussing but okay.

You are largely correct, but I don't think you're debating anyone.

>> No.24912532

i masturbate in waves, like every day for 2 weeks, and then i dont for a few months. which leaves lots of chafing.

>> No.24912554


I'll bring the dice, what system are we using?

>> No.24912556

I thinks it's possible but it will be very difficult requiring a combination of familiar material advances and unheard of immaterial ones. But we're on the way I think, this thread is a prime example of it in my mind.

>> No.24912559

let me put this in a way you might possibly understand.


for fucks sake if you dont like it leave. there are any number of stories about things that I dont agree with but I dont try to stop them from being written I just dont read them myself. the nazis thought like you do, "I dont agree with this books message we must burn them all."

>> No.24912581

LARP. Put em up.

>> No.24912606

Sometimes I have a really long session of like four hours and it's sore afterwards. Never torn anything though.

>> No.24912711

Those two points are essentially HFY in a nutshell.

Glorification of war as a means of solving problems and advancing human society, as has been expressed in this thread, is a problem in the real world that has resulted in a lot of people dying for, in some cases, very stupid reasons. It's the school of thought that led to WW1.

And then the idea that humanity hurting itself and subjecting itself to horrific conditions is really a good thing is also a big point of HFY. It is also something that perpetuates that very behavior, and the harm that comes from it.

Essentially, the Social Darwinist ideology behind HFY has had its mark on the real world, and a horrifying one at that.

>> No.24912737

If I were a future-human.

I'd genocide anything I couldn't procreate with to further my bloodline, or couldn't be eaten. This may or may not include colonists on my planet after space prom.

>> No.24912751

I'm not seeing the same essentiality honestly.

I've seen stories about human beings sacrificing themselves as HFY.

It's an aspect I guess.

>> No.24912797

dont argue hes one of those fags who over analyzes everything. The main character ate a turkey sandwhich the sandwhich symbolises his basic hatred for the world.

he doesnt like something so he must convince everyone of a reason for it to be shit.

>> No.24912824

The "human sacrifice" element in HFY usually gets played up as a dramatic element. It's more like "look at how determined humanity is, willing to throw millions into the meat grinder in order to crush those aliens and advance human civilization, see how glorious their sacrifice is."

>> No.24912862

can you possibly not belittle everything you narcissistic hippy faggot?

>> No.24912893

was waiting for this one

>> No.24912897

Not really a message issue that these treehugging faggots seem to be going on about.

But a disappointing amount of these short stories feature repeated phrases either ad naseum or first+last. There was one where they kept saying 'we should have been concerned' with such repetition that it was practically a period. Then there were at least 2 others(I can't be asked to read every story right now) that started with a line in the first three sentences and, as mentioned, ended with the exact same sentence for 'dramatic effect'.


Also the story about first contact being a mess hall was just fucking bad.

>> No.24913018

Read this >>24909579

Now tell me there isn't an ideology behind it.

When you want to write fiction, that's fine. Great even. But if you make it a really blatant argument for a particular ideology, it stops being just a work of fiction, and because more of a personal monologue, arguing for a particular belief.

There is the difference between War of the Worlds and most of the HFY OC that you see posted here. War of the Worlds was a story in its own right. Did it also have a message about the endurance of humanity? Yes, but that wasn't all it was. You can talk about it without talking about that particular message.

The OC posted in most HFY threads don't have that. They have all of the subtlety of a modern political cartoon. There isn't a story that can stand on its own, just a message with some story like trimmings. Or, in some cases, an outright monologue, like the OP.

>> No.24913087

> not belittle everything
> you narcissistic hippy faggot

>> No.24913186

remember that in the movie that picture and the writing in it are about an event where humans needed a particular rare element, only available in one place, humans tried to trade for it but the natives would not trade, they tried to build schools and teach them but they wanted none of that either. the navi worshipped the plants on their world and would have been destroyed rather easily using any number of orbital weapons but the humans (as far as we know) decided to not use them because they didnt want to wipe them out.

its not about humanities ideology (although it is mentioned) its about how we have done so much without some mother gaia, how we are better than them because of what we have DONE and created.

there is no denying which race accomplished more in that movie, the only reason the navi survived period was because the director was a pansy liberal fucktard.

>> No.24913277

Is there a third one to this?

>> No.24913288

It'd be silly to assume we didn't make a second pass and blow the commies outa the sky.

But really the general/commander was my favorite character.

>> No.24913324

actually Im sorry I was side tracked let me find it

>> No.24913341

So let me get this straight.

You actually think that the thread image is serious?

>> No.24913344

I already found it by doing a reverse image search and going to an archive of an old HFY thread.

Thanks though.

>> No.24913355

stop with your faggot arguing and post more screencaps of writefaggotry

>> No.24913386

He thinks it pushes a message or something apparently.

The more pressing matter is that he seems to think people are lapping the message up.

>> No.24913388

And that movie was terrible because its message was that there is a simple solution to a very complex problem. Which is outright not true. It was also terribly written and directed, but that's another issue entirely.

Yeah, Avatar was bad. You'll get no argument from me there. But in many respects it is bad for the same reasons that HFY is bad. It's a message with story-like trimmings, and the message isn't even any good.

>> No.24913409

sorry, that guy is getting on my nerves. I should let him but my god does it bother me.

>> No.24913513


>> No.24913568

posting anyway

>> No.24913574

>Find living human
>"Your worship is... Acceptable. Continue."

>> No.24913588

Scroll up. A lot of people do take it seriously.


>> No.24913632

>people are this stupid and somehow still can use a computer.

I fear for the future if you ever reproduce

>> No.24913796

You... You're kidding me right?

Is this one of those "Trolls trolling trolls" situations?

How can you possibly take people throwing out phrases like "gaia loving hippie faggot" seriously? It's like they're doing their best to sound like a right-winger from the later '60s.

People want to make a thread where sometimes humanity does genuinely awesome things, but sometimes humanity IS the evil empire and doesn't even realize it. In both situations, humanity wins. That's all.

>> No.24913842

you, I like you.

>> No.24913963

> It's like they're doing their best to sound like a right-winger from the later '60s.

Or /pol/. Which is pretty much the same thing.

>> No.24914034


Holy shit. That's fucking awesome.

>tfw you will not live to see the empire of Earth conquer the galaxy, and turn its thirst for conquest to the universe

>> No.24914037

> How can you possibly take people throwing out phrases like "gaia loving hippie faggot" seriously? It's like they're doing their best to sound like a right-winger from the later '60s.

I envy you. You honestly believe that such people can't possibly be serious. That's some serious faith in humanity.

You'd be surprised at some of the things people say completely seriously.

>> No.24914168

If you avoid 90% of the posts itt, you find some great short stories. Thanks OP, your thread made my night.

>> No.24914201

>Black text on blue background
My eyes.

>> No.24914214


I love this thread.

>> No.24914260

sorry, the weird part is it was actually much lighter and easier to read before I saved it, paintbrush is shit nowdays.

>> No.24914337

I don't suppose we can get some HFY's like this one?

>Not about Humanity as a whole, but rather individuals/small groups being total bros
>Interspecies sex is not required, but will not be rejected

>> No.24914352


I think its dumb. Prometheus gave humans Fire because they were to dumb to do it themselves in that legend. HFY as a response is fucking retarded.

>> No.24914356

>only about a third still adhere to religion
(assuming I read that correctly and didn't overlook a word, which is entirely possible)
>on his way back from a lawyer to regain visitation rights
>more civilized part of the world

This has some serious implications, or just sloppy writing with a pointed agenda. Apparently being part of the civilized world means living in the bible belt(or his equivalent), and not being part of the civilized world is full of godless hippies. He also makes it sound like his parents/guardians, despite apologizing for them, are rallying to take his property and probably against his contact with his children. There are certainly asshole families full of assholes, but to claim only a third of the planet still adheres to religion, and that he's from a better area, where they happen to value religion that much, is just absurd.

Sounds more like the author hates religion, and has no concept of paradigms independent of the paranormal existing.

Chapter 1 was kind of silly as well. It'd be a reasonable assumption that he's former military considering a sane person, and even trained military, do not dumbfuck at an enemy unarmed. ESPECIALLY one you've never encountered personally. Just wow. I hope chapter 3 can reconcile some of this.

>> No.24914370

Why didn't they just destroy the planet from orbit?
Why didn't they just destroy it from the comfort of their solar system?
Why didn't they just send robots, or nano bots to do the dirty work?
Why didn't they do psychological profiling on the people they sent into the field?
Why didn't they nuke the planet when the first human casualties were reported?
Why did they name the element they wanted such a stupid name?

>> No.24914372

>give kid box of legos
>be shocked by the intricate designs and forms the shape it into independent of your involvement.

>> No.24914405

Its more like
>In honor of the guy who gave us legos, lets devote a thread to stories of how we used those legos to knock over the sandcastles of other kids and say how we did it all by ourselves without anyones help.

>> No.24914409

Pan-Humanity Fuck Yeah

>> No.24914439

Oh I know.

Most stuff in this thread has just struck me as caricature though.

I guess Poe's law is in full effect. It's just my default stance to take everything effected by said law as parody so long as I'm on 4chan. It makes things significantly more pleasant.

>> No.24914442

1. They wanted the resources.
2. Resources
3. Good question
4. Sounds expensive
5. Resources
6. Why the hell did you ask those other three questions if you remembered they wanted this element Fucking Frodo.

>> No.24914454

>Why did they name the element they wanted such a stupid name?
actually its not a stupid name, unobtainium is a scientific term for "the perfect element for our needs" something that works perfectly to do what you want with no downsides.

its a real term.

>> No.24914478

Yea. Pretty much. Was that not what I said?

Pretty sure in most of these stories, the other kids sandcastles got started long before we did, and being presumptuous of our development or their territory spurred a retaliation, which admittedly is extreme seemingly every time, no less than genocide.

>> No.24914495


I like ones like this. Ones that give an alien's view on two near polar opposite human behaviors (and not quite understand it, either) that also punch you right in the feels.

Also the humorous ones involving Aliens completely misunderstanding (or shedding light on the absurdity) of things we do.

>There was one where some kind of insectoid alien was watching a youth football game, and mistook it for humans training their "larvae" for war.

>> No.24914501

You're not wrong, but taken as a whole I thought it was a very entertaining short story.
I wish I knew who wrote it and if there was any more, I think the author has a lot of potential.

>> No.24914532

>There was one where some kind of insectoid alien was watching a youth football game, and mistook it for humans training their "larvae" for war.
Dear god, imagine what it would have thought if it watched a good hockey game

>> No.24914550

Unless it breaks down, you should be able to slag the planed and mine the broken husk.

I don't remember them mentioning anything like that.

>> No.24914557

Yeah, fuck trees, what did they ever do for me?

>> No.24914594

even more Fuck trees on other planets, what have they ever done for humans?

>> No.24914627

Mining in an atmosphere, even one at least partially toxic, is cheaper than mining in a vacuum. You only need those masks, not a full suit. The fact that they can walk around with bare skin is incredibly fortunate on its own.

>> No.24914655

watch the world burn with a few tons or napalm

>> No.24914666


Oh man.

I also want to see how it would view American Gladiator.

>Watches a rap battle
>Oh by X'thychik, the Humans use verbal incantations to battle each other! They must have developed some kind of psychic power!

Or has some human explain what mustard is.
>Wait, so you get the seeds from these flowers, and grind them up into paste?
>And we smear it on our food, yup.
>And you pick these flowers, because the seeds release chemicals that make them unpleasant to consume?
>And you find the pain caused by this enjoyable?
>Yeah. Want some?

>> No.24914694

But isn't that easier than dealing with casualties, and one could use mining ships or those exosuits they had available.

>> No.24914703

The ability to grow edible food outside in just a simple garden also probably helps. And then there's the fact that a human being can walk around even without a mask for as long as they can hold their breath, so accidents aren't as hilarious lethal.

>> No.24914733

better idea, engineer a virus to whipe out the navi.

then put them in forced labor camps to earn vaccines mining.

>> No.24914752

Casualties are avoidable if you're not stupid. Environmental hazards like radiation of a vacuum are something you must deal with using equipment no matter how clever you are.

The problem was the entire story was terribly written, and the characters were made as hostile as possible in order to create a dramatic confrontation in the time span of a movie.

>> No.24914793

Except they have machines built for mining to do the mining, machines that they already brought with them, so they might as well use.

This is the problem with slave labor, it makes people think in small, per-industrial terms.

>> No.24914809

That should probably be "or a vacuum."

>> No.24914830

yeah but while your maachines mine on one side you can make the navi mine the other side and increase production.

>> No.24914847

> better idea, engineer a virus to whipe out the navi.

That's actually a lot harder than you seem to think. We can come up with bio weapons to kill humans relatively easily because nature has already done most of the work for us. We just improve upon already existing viruses to make them even more devastating. Putting together a new organism from scratch that will kill an alien species (without killing you) is beyond the abilities of a mining company.

>> No.24914855

Not to be rude, but I'm guessing you're also athiest. I am too, but this kind of 'religion is prime-evil-numero-uno' kinda stuff in a short story is very annoying. My parents taught me religion because they wanted to do what they believed was right or best for me. I decided for myself it wasn't, but that didn't make them assholes. I just don't believe what they believe. Chapter 3 doesn't let up on the religion crap, and then he decides to do his little wrap up with:
>their firearms couldn't penetrate modern shielding
>water cannons would pulverize our bones
Assuming that juxtaposition was supposed to say 'we're so advanced, yet compared to them weak' however it just throws a redflag of 'wait, our guns can't penetrate your shields, but water could?' Although I'm sure someone would be quick to point out he didn't say water cannons could penetrate shields, but by virtue of both being a kinetic force, the gun would have to be even more effective. I'm sure an ordinary bullet would rip right through whatever shields the hunters had since pulse rifles seem to be no stronger than fucking punches and three shots burst a bubble.

The constant ominous cues from the human about 'being ready' would also put any sentient being, I'd assume, on red alert considering that was a threat in every way but name.

Then all that bullshit about Saturn and the stealth field was just unnecessary and felt like filler.

Overall, I've read shorter and better.

>> No.24914870


Oh damn. That's a good one.

>> No.24914877

Our first contact with an alien race was minor. They were primitives, barely advancing beyond stone spears and axes, building primitive wooden constructions. A few tribes fought us, but they were easily crushed by even the limited technology the early settles had at their disposal. The remaining tribes kowtowed to our strength and our benevolence in letting them live.

Soon, they were introduced into the greater glory of panhumanity, another member of the growing Empire of Earth.
Then came Second Contact.
It was...more eventful, shall we say.

It happened above a small world known as Adriat III. Three human craft encountered an alien one, ugly and functional. Our ships tried to hail, but the only response we received was gunfire. All of our ships were destroyed with all hands lost.

And so, we declared war upon them. We tracked their signals across space, and began to hunt their ships and colonies down. We took prisoners, inflicted losses, tried to construct interspecies dictionaries.
They retaliated in kind. They were more prepared for war than us, it seemed. Better weapons, better tactics. They were horrible to look at. Large things, sort of reptilian. Six limb bones, four limbs. Vaguely dinosaurian stance. Difficult to kill, regrew things. Used robots sometimes, primitive things, not like our ship AIs. Took no prisoners, never broke or fled, only ever retreated to safe locations, never surrendered.

>> No.24914889

That's not how it works. You've got spots that you want to mine. You put the machines to work in those spots. Putting slave laborers there means that there are squishy people in the way of the machines. Squishy people who don't know a thing about mining.

>> No.24914897


But humanity adapts, and we adapted fast. Outthought them, outfought them. Each encounter was desperate, each battle hard-fought. But slowly, but surely, we were winning.

And then we found their homeworld. A relatively packed star system, two habitable worlds next to each other, one covered in cities, the other in jungle. Other little outposts around the other planets, on moons and in orbit. Fair bit of wreckage surrounding most of them.

We launched a massive last-ditch assault across all the colonies we'd found that we hadn't touched yet. A feint, something they'd never seemed any good at spotting. We drew them out to defend their worlds, then pulled into the gnarl and struck at their homeworld and threw everything we had at it. It burned under our guns, relativistic weapons tore it to shreds, comets were pulled from the sky and hurled towards it.

Their colonies were out of operation. The homeworld was dead. Humanity was superior over the aliens.

Humanity had won. It had been a desperate fight, but the sweetest victories come from the most desperate struggles.

>> No.24914909

humans can survive in the vacuum of space for a bit as well. Not happy in the slightest and scrambling to get back inside instantly, but still capable of doing it. Long enough to survive leaping from one open latch to another less than a couple meters away.

With serious damage of course.

>> No.24914938

Is this supposed to be a parody? It reeks of the worst things that came out of the Avatar Crusade.

>> No.24914942

we made puppet bodies of them why cant we make something to kill them?

>> No.24914955

And as far as we can tell, on Pandora, as long as you don't breathe in, you're fine. You can walk around, walk back inside, and be fine. If you're exposed to a hard vacuum, even if you survive, you're not going to be anything approaching "fine."

1 atmosphere that you can't breathe is better than none at all.

>> No.24914959

was thinking more drop them off and come back later to pick up shipments out of the way from the mining machines,

>> No.24914961

To be real, a gallon of water sprayed out of a cannon has a lot more kinetic force then a bullet.

I think the idea of their guns is that it's concentrated kinetic energy, focused at a point. A bullet is much along the same lines, though if their guns are only slightly more powerful then paintball guns, I'd be worried for them.

>> No.24914962

That was really boring. The same old stuff, repeated again.

>> No.24914963

Capture them, figure out a substance that is harmful to their biology but not to ours, spray the planet with it.

Though I must say it is silly to argue fiction in something that is so unrealistic as that movie.

>> No.24914980

>a navi is sickly
>a doctor(which they have plenty of) does multiple cultures of navi cells
>isolates infected cells
>propogates virulant strains

>> No.24914991

Because that's not just a question of expertise in terms of, say, growing/cloning/whatevering one. It's also a question of creating an entirely new organism that in many respects has nothing to do with them, except for killing them and only them.

That's hard. We can't even do that for humans very easily, and we know human beings pretty well.

>> No.24915032

Except one of the terribly written plot points is that they don't give a fuck about any sort of medicine that we could give them, because it isn't really an issue for them. Which is in turn because the entire planet's ecosystem is actually managed by a tree hive mind.

>> No.24915070

Then the aliens stopped fucking around. Within a month, we were totally defenceless. Every spaceport, every star station, every ship in our navy was destroyed. They came to Earth and tore through our ramshackle defences within an hour. Those of us on Mars could only watch as our homeworld died. We'd barely destroyed a quarter of their forces. We'd only been a thorn in their sides until they got complacent.

They offered us the hand of friendship. It was customary, apparently. Letting a defeated enemy join the pack. We accepted. What else could we do? We'd lost. We found out later that they'd been involved in another war at the time.
We're proud one again, as we were before. We proved ourselves to them later, when the Neptirae swept into our portion of the galaxy. But we never forgot how humanity only existed due to the benevolence of the Garars.

Mostly. Also, I'm very tired right now and just wrote as I went along.

>> No.24915079

So it can control what proteins bind to what, and manage each and every cell's biology?

Well then what if we bombarded the surface with high energy gamma rays?

>> No.24915109

As a blob/stream a half dozen yards away, sure. Which was about the range they were firing those pulse rifles if I imagined the halls of that office reasonably. Probably less.

But a bullet is far more precise, range capable, and has much much higher penetrating power, although as the bullets get even moderately larger their overall kinetic force, or stopping power, escalates largely.

It sounds like you could fire water balloons from a potato gun into their shields and obliterate a target.

>> No.24915124

Or what if we blocked most of the light getting cast on the world and let it freeze for a while, though some creatures have been known to survive water freezing temperatures I don't know if anything could survive near 0K.

>> No.24915142

planet tree becomes braindead and now lives on as a world spanning vegitable

>> No.24915143 [SPOILER] 

You'll make it angry.
You won't like it when it's angry.

>> No.24915145

Did the world tree have to be alive for humans to mine the Aeris-rocks?

I'm just thinking radiation from a high orbit nuclear device would suffice if the lifestreamrock doesn't go inert when all the blue cats are dead.

>> No.24915180

What about stuff we can learn from the wildlife? Seriously, the amount of medical discoveries possible from an entire new alien ecosystem would be huge.

>> No.24915202

The amount of sigourney weaver you're secreting right now sickens me, Mr. Scientist.

>> No.24915208

Well, there is the issue that the company higher ups didn't believe the scientists when they said that the trees are a big hive mind, so they probably wouldn't be taking it into account in their decision making.

And really, this is all pointless anyway. In reality, a native group would simply not be able to resist a group armed with modern weapons. The entire climax is absurd because it requires that bows be able to bring down attack helicopters. So all of this "kill all life on the planet" bit is a complete waste of resources solving a problem that only exists due to bad writing.

>> No.24915221

And we can find the cure for that sickness if we dissect a shitload of this stuff!

>> No.24915229

The idea that they had to mine through the tree in the first place was absurd. You don't have to mine straight down.

>> No.24915235

She killed tougher aliens before, and was equipped with even worse quality gear. Show here some respect.

>> No.24915243

hell just blow up the glowtrees and they lose all social coherence

>> No.24915244

No, we nuke the entire planet from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

>> No.24915245

True, but it still is fun isn't it?

>> No.24915253

Again, the people in charge of the company refused to believe that the trees were anything but trees. So they wouldn't know to do anything like that.

>> No.24915267

Water cannons mounted on trucks can knock you down over a hundred or so feet away. And I'm pretty sure their shields are more geared towards spike damage rather then sustained.

So while yes a bullet may have more KE then water at a thousand yards, it's not going to measure up to a few gallons flying at you from a hundred feet away. The water just simply weighs more and has a larger surface area.

>> No.24915278

What if a facehugger/navi spawn interfaced with the tree?

Oh god it would be a giant planet spanning hivemind that wants nothing more than to destroy

>> No.24915289

Replace Pandora with a planet of an actual deathworld where the world tree is reanimating corpses with bacteria and roots and everything runs on acid instead of blood and pretty colors and happy feelings. Better movie?

>> No.24915297

Please tell me I'm not the only one who found her extremely attractive in that movie.

>> No.24915306

Not really. It strikes me more as some kids saying "well MY arrows can go through bulletproof glass," followed by "well MY guys don't even go at you in helicopters, we use a virus," and then "well MY guys don't have to worry about viruses, because of the trees," and "well MY guys use gamma rays to..." And so on.

I don't find it terribly fun, considering the starting point was really horrible to begin with.

>> No.24915334

You really want to argue the water point?

We're not fighting these pussywillow aliens with water. We're bringing artillery shells and atomic payloads to bear on their candy asses.

And an artillery shell is denser, weighs more, and has more kinetic force.

>> No.24915343


>> No.24915348

I don't think there is any ill will here, or anyone with a real stake in this. We are simply discussing a poorly written piece that was obviously geared to making one side win and attempting to poke theoretical holes in it.

>> No.24915349

While I'm tempted to say "it's Sigourney Weaver, you're fine," she's also getting, well, old. So for her in Avatar? You're probably not the only one, but your numbers are dwindling.

>> No.24915357

Yes, please.

You're not alone. She's a very attractive woman. Looked like shit during the aliens trilogy, imo. But I didn't like the look of the time.

>> No.24915360

Well she is moot's mom.

>> No.24915369

Thats why Aqua Blue, a comic with a lot of very same themes to Avatar, from hot naked blue chicks to a human eventually becoming chief of the aliens to a corrupt corporation trying to exploit them for lodsa emone to even a psychic connection with the planet, is so much better. The aliens actually fall prey to alcohol and other tricks, die by guns, and then proceed to arm themselves with the very guns that strike them down. Its also rad as hell.

>> No.24915371

No, no, just human female Sigourney Weaver in Avatar. Nothing wrong with older women. More experienced.

>> No.24915387

And I always hated Frodo, so I guess that's just not my thing.

When the entire conflict only exists in the first place because of terrible writing, I'm really tempted to just nip the whole thing in the bud and not even bother with what could be done if you accepted the base premise. I'm just not willing to let the initial problems go in order to get to all the what ifs that come after that.

>> No.24915400

Well you're no fun, mister. Don't have to be a party pooper.

>> No.24915401

I'm not saying we would fight them with water, I'm simply saying that it wouldn't be too out there for someone to say that a sustained force would more easily go through a shield built to stop kinetic energy then a bullet would.

When you get down to the Kinetic Energy in a bullet, it really isn't that high. It's more the fact that the bullet is a hardened piece of metal that pierces through flesh and releases it's energy inside your body. The bullet itself isn't going to have anymore power then the recoil of the gun. It's just focused at one point.

>> No.24915441

Almost anything that is not the simplest of stories has at lest a few plot holes, yes Avatar has more than most but that is because it attempts to entertain.

And as far as I am aware the whole "frodo and the eagles thing" actually has more than a few plausible explanations

>> No.24915450

Well, if I'm no fun, THEN THERE WILL BE NO FUN.


>> No.24915466

>This is how BBEG's get started.

Kill them, kill them all Anon

>> No.24915487

I think it's been solidly established that the eagles were not a plot hole in the Lord of the Rings.

You can't just fly into Mordor, you'd be swarmed by thousands of orcs when you landed not to mention the possible Anti-air resistance.

>> No.24915501

Use their bodies for twisted experiments! Rape a few, just to see how it feels! Spill a child's ice cream over them and laugh maniacally!

>> No.24915503

If that chilling you feel is due to the horrible voice acting, then yes I agree it's chilling.

>> No.24915506

That largely depends on the type of round used, and by extension which gun. A bullet is a very broad term.

While a smaller caliber may not destroy their shields(obviously can't test, but I believe they still would), some larger caliber handguns have enough punch to knock a 250lb man on his ass when hit at short-medium range.

But I feel like we're not really arguing anything here so w/e.

>> No.24915543

>Humanity walks into Mordor.
>Fuck year.

>> No.24915546

>Overall, I've read shorter and better.
Of course you have, as have I, I never said or meant to imply it was a masterpiece. I'm just saying I saw potential, somebody who could use the written word to entertain me and keep me reading. Every one of your critiques has merit, I'm just saying that the guy can write an entertaining short. You sound like you expect a master work from a random story posted on /tg/

>> No.24915580

Hah, had that exact same thought. The VA for that was absolutely terrible.

>> No.24915581

Actually a better plot hole now that I think of it is why fucking Mount Doom was just open to the public.

You think Sauron, Master of Metals and Creator of the Ring would know that's the only way to destroy it and would keep it under lock and key. Hell, I'd have atleast one Nazgul on patrol outside it at all times.

>> No.24915582

That tends to be movie magic a lot of the time. Even if you shoot someone with a .44 magnum at close range, it's not going to fling them. Shotguns wont knock people off their feet and through a window. The rounds you fire don't gain energy after they leave the barrel. The only time you have less recoil then what you fire is when you have some form of muzzle break or recoil compensation.

The force pushing against you is equal to the bullet pushing against him, though slightly less due to air resistance.

I'm just trying to say this theoretical shield was probably designed to handle spike loads, as in massive increases in energy over a short time and in one location. I'm well aware it's not something worth arguing about, and I apologize to have dragged it out so far.

>> No.24915639

He'd been defeated in the past. Stands to reason he's not above misjudging his enemies.

Maybe Mordor is really hard to get into 9.9 times out of 10.

>> No.24915648


/k/ here, no they fucking don't. Anyone falling due to a bullet does so due to their nervous and muscular systems reacting to the newly created hole in their body. Even a 20mm anti-materiel rifle will only cause me, someone with below average strength and weight to move backwards at less than 2m/s, even this is nowhere near enough to "knock a 250lb man on his ass when hit at short-medium range". Bullets are destructive not due to extreme energy, but because they focus there energy on an extremely small area which allows them to destroy vital organs and other objects that they can penetrate.

>> No.24915676


*"their energy", my bad.

>> No.24915770

I was hoping for something more like this.


>> No.24915827

A 20 mm autocanon shot has about 50 k joules, assuming a pointed tip that would mostly go thorough you, assuming the energy was delivered using a flat surface do you know how much momentum would be imparted?'

I am afraid I don't know the calculations myself.

>> No.24915883

The whole "war as a driver of scientific advancement" generally resembles a sort of divide between what the lay public thinks of as important scientific advances, meaning discoveries that people can immediately turn into weapons, industrial tools or household goods, and what real scientists consider to be important scientific advances, well-developed theories that lead to further areas of studies and experimental results that have important consequences for further study. It's usually the second dumbest part of a HFY story.

>> No.24915931

The problem is that even with a perfectly flat surface, you're still going to have the body break and absorb the energy. I've actually got a book around here somewhere with some info that might help, if I can find the table it has in it, I'll give better info. But it'll probably knock you over, not off your feet and cave in your ribcage.

>> No.24915937

I personally would say that war leads less to scientific achievement, and more to engineering achievement.

>> No.24915944

Yeah, something like that would have worked much better

>> No.24915959

Fine war leads to technological advancement, which is the just applied science.

>> No.24916119

*I mean this as knocking you over and caving in your ribcage. Not that it would just knock you over.

Also a 20mm round can be more then just a solid projectile. Some of them can be explosive.

>> No.24917071

I'll always love the Rifftrax comment for her in Avatar
"Where's my God damned cigarette?"
"Love her already"

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