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23870709 No.23870709 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

The 40K setting depresses me so much. It's just such a lost Universe. Every race is so horrible. Everything is so miserable. Everything is just geared towards war and death. I'm sure at times the races fought for things, but now it just seems to be endless combat for the sake of combat.

Is there even a potential happy ending? Is there anything that could happen that would result in any sense of goodness for the people who live in the Galaxy?

Are there any worlds, or even cities where civilians live happily?

>> No.23870744

>Is there even a potential happy ending?

Get married, grow old, die knowing your wife and kids loved you. Not every planet in 40k is a complete shithole. There's agriworlds that might never see anything worse than a crop blight. There's Imperial Worlds that might only know war as something that happens far away. The galaxy is a big place and while there's a fight going on almost everywhere, it's not every planet fighting tooth and nail. There's a lot of crapsack planets and the general situation in the galaxy is fubar, but it's not 100% bleak and dark all the time, everywhere.

>> No.23870762

Yes, lots. The Imperium is vast, and so usually so long as you're not living in a Hive or Death world you're doing okay.

>> No.23870772


Depends on the faction. For mankind the happy ending has all of mankind evolving into a psychic race at which point they will probably just continue happily eradicating all other forms of sentient life.

>> No.23870778

Yes. The galaxy is vast- not every world is besieged by awful and terrible horrors. Not every guardsman drawn from his home dies in screaming agony. Not every planetary governor is a corrupt tyrant. Not every life has to end so terribly.

It wouldn't be grimdark otherwise. You need those scant few candles in the dark to give tragedy meaning.

>> No.23870782

your post just recindled my love for the Warhammer setting.

>> No.23870786
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In the fluffy brightness of the 41st millennium, there is only Tau.

>> No.23870791

>Are there any worlds, or even cities where civilians live happily?

Yes, but they are destroyed for being rebels.

>> No.23870792
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>> No.23870797

The best case scenario is the Emperor finally being allowed to die, and hopefully reincarnating in time to save some remnants of mankind and just hit the big RESET button on the Galaxy with his mind.

>> No.23870800


Least worst, and a home to happy civilians, which I think answers the OP's question in a satisfactory manner.

>> No.23870801
File: 56 KB, 180x180, 180px-Heresy_vein-popping.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


Enjoy your plot armor while it lasts, xeno... Soon, your pathetic fistful of worlds will burn in the cleansing fire of Exterminatus, as they should have long ago!

>> No.23870818


OP, this should answer your question. 40k fans love them some grimdark, and the Tau are such good guys that the mere mention of them sends the neckbeards flying into a rage.

>> No.23870823


TIDF please leave.

>> No.23870837

>Are there any worlds, or even cities where civilians live happily?
Yes. The 40k setting is deliberately vast and varied.

>> No.23870841


Like, this is how bad it is. It's to the point that they can't even take a joke. This is /tg/, the ultimate master among 4chan boards when it comes to deflecting troll attempts into genuine discussions, and the mere mention of Tau in the most neutral manner possible is still enough to cause a shitfit.

>> No.23870845
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obvious xeno is obvious

>> No.23870847

Yeah, /tg/'s inability to get the entertaining extended joke that was TIDF was kind of a low point.

>> No.23870848

>they can't even take a joke

The irony is palpable.

>> No.23870852


It's not that they're such good guys, it's the fact that they suddenly appear out of nowhere, armored in layer after layer of plot armor as to why no-one ever gave 'em the trashing they deserved (and still don't. Surprising how both the Imperium and Chaos hand coincidentally something better to do than whack them during the 13th BC, and how Tyranids got out-evolutioned!)

Sorry, but a deus ex machina race meant to pamper 12 yo animu mecha loving retards is retarded. The fact that they're also too good and kind to be credible is just the far too sugared icing on an already extremely disgusting cake!

>> No.23870858


The Necrons have out deus ex machina'd the Tau. The Tau are now nicely grim derp, and it's just the fanboys that can't see them as anything other than the pure race that are annoying as all get out.

>> No.23870859


>joke's on them I was just pretending to be retarded

>> No.23870867


>They see me trolling, they hating, trying to catch me posting dirty

>> No.23870874

>meant to pamper 12 yo animu mecha loving retards

Behind all of your hollow criticisms is this core grievance. Everything else is just a smokescreen for the persistent thought that "this will let all the weeaboos into my hobby!" If it weren't for this single complaint, you would maintain none of the others.

>> No.23870881

WH40K is to /tg/ as far right nutbaggery is to /pol/.

>> No.23870886

But it's a perfectly valid point irregardless, Tau do not, in any fashion, form or being belong in the 40k universe. This is so apparently obvious by the facts that >>23870852 pointed out
>it's the fact that they suddenly appear out of nowhere, armored in layer after layer of plot armor as to why no-one ever gave 'em the trashing they deserved (and still don't. Surprising how both the Imperium and Chaos hand coincidentally something better to do than whack them during the 13th BC, and how Tyranids got out-evolutioned!)
That shit is ridiculous. If anything, the Tau should've been stomped out of existence the moment they became space-faring.

>> No.23870896


You are the worst kind of person.

>> No.23870906

>But it's a perfectly valid point

Except that it isn't.

>> No.23870907


And your point would be? Or will you also deny that in the last 10 years, the game has evolved from a "play to have fun" to a WAAC mentality, primarily due to the target public becoming younger and younger and it's inability to tajke a beating like an adult?

Seriously, whenever I see a Space Marine army today, with more Terminators than Tactical Marines, I want to club the player to death with his Codex in an attempt to get the fluff into the mess that is supposed to pass of for its brains...

>> No.23870930


I didn't know Tau were responsible for the relationship between Terminators and Tactical Marines.

>> No.23870940
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>the game has evolved from a "play to have fun" to a WAAC mentality

It depends on who you play with. I met people back in 3rd ed that found any way they could to make sure their list was the best. All the newer editions did was give people different models to make beardy lists with.

>> No.23870943
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There is hope in the greater good.

>> No.23870976

Necrons gain their souls back, finally leave their metal prisons and ascend to Necron heaven.

Chaos finally leave the Eldar alone, Eldar peacefully settle on a small system and carry out their lives, creating new baby Eldar without fear and loving parenthood.

The emporer finally dies and becomes a god, saving humans from death and destruction and removing the corruption in the empirium, teaching love and allowing all imperials to live together in harmony.

Chaos realize that they can solve their problems by making peace with the imperials, they are allowed to practice whatever they desire on certain planets allocated to them, demons start to be powered by happiness and love rather than hate and fear, and go about spreading cheer and goodwill.

The tau and their allies live peacefully with the Imperials, learning more and more about themselves and what they mean as individuals in this huge galaxy.

Tyranid hive mind is finally contacted somehow and reasoned with, realizing the harm it is causing it downsizes and goes about eating garbage of the imperials and others, loving every moment.

And the orks? Well, the orks are given the chance to discover what Gork and Mork intended for them, but for that they must travel to another galaxy, and they set off on an amazing and magical adventure, making sure to krump some ead's on the way.

>> No.23870997


You mean regardless.

>> No.23871012

My little spacemarine : happyending is magic the story

>> No.23871027

Or was it a joke?

He seemed like a genuine Tau fan to me.

>> No.23871031

what? the Ork have mythical adventures that you must follow, crushing every galaxy in their wake.

>> No.23871072

Part of me thinks they could still pull the "hopeless perpetual war" schtick even if there was a grand alliance of the three saner empires. Plus it would be good fluff for counter crusades inside the eye. Not that I want chaos completely neutered but chaos on partial defensive could also mean shit like battles in the bowels of hell itself.

>> No.23871168

>could also mean shit like battles in the bowels of hell itself.
And we all want more heavy metal battles like that.

>> No.23871220

Probably a genuine Tau fan, but he noticed the anti-Tau feeling and decided to role-play as their noble defender. Tongue was definitely in cheek. If he was deadly serious and not having fun with it, he would have just been constantly angry. From what I saw he did the opposite- provoked rage in others by being polite and nice. I found it amusing, at least.

>> No.23871284

So question about the concept of Xenos and heresy.

So, the Imperium fleets are out exploring, and they find a random planet with non-human sentient life on it.


>> No.23871310


They usually try to see if the species is worth enslaving, wiping out or ignoring for the time being. If there's good resources and the locals aren't a particular risk they can be forced into labour camps to be worked to death. If the locals are a risk they can potentially be culled in a variety of ways, and if they are a risk and actually can fight back in some meaningful way they're usually left alone until such time that a proper warfleet and invasion force can be bought to bare.

>> No.23871312

No, that's just how dumb bros joke about it. The empire is a lot saner in the fluff than 40k fans portray it (that's not that significant an improvement but they're still not Khornates with nicer gear)

>> No.23871315


Depends on who's doing the exploring, but that's the general eventual outcome: xenocide or exterminatus.

A Rogue Trader will generally attempt to exploit them as much as he can before the Imperium gets wind of their existence and purge them.

An AdMech explorator fleet MIGHT enslave them if the world is rich enough in base materials and it's efficienter to enslave the xenos rather than build an army of servitors to do the Work.

Any other Imperial instance will result in BURN, XENO SCUM! BURN!

I suggest reading the "Horus Heresy" novels if you want more information on Mankind's general attitude toward abhumans and xenos!

>> No.23871330

So pretty much humans are viewed by other races in the Galaxy as just as horrible, evil and awful as the Orks, Tyranids, etc

>> No.23871351


Yes! There are reasons why the Emperor is depicted as "Space Hitler", you know... Basically, for the humans, Humanity is the Über-race, and all others need to be purified from the Galaxy by force of arms in order for Humanity to achieve its potential.

>> No.23871353

yes sadly. This is why, at least I, like the Tao.

Imperium: KILL THE XENO (or burn if it is sisters), for our thousands of years of doctrine tells us to do so! also good chance of them turning into chaos monstrosities

Eldar: ignore them, maybe manipulate them into doing something we want.


Orks: Smash dem gits! (their even handed approach to all things is appealing all things considered)

Necrons: ...

Chaos: Sacrifice them to a chaos god! Always need more sacrifices!


Tao: Lets see if we can use them, if so, lets turn them into second class, but alive and capable of leading a decent life, citizens!

And what I love about the tao is that shit has backfired on them before! but they keep trying it because its much better to have a small war to bring someone under you than a small enemy floating about ready to stab your back when your vulnerable. They are the only empire progressing in the fluff, the only ones who, if given enough time, could win the whole galaxy. Shit only them and the empire could make a livable galaxy but the empire is way to stagnant to ever do it.

>> No.23871359

Of course there's worlds where people are happy. People have an amazing power to be happy almost anywhere.

Look at Hive cities, massive edifices filled with more people than any earthly city, many approaching full nations of their own in population.

Does that make them unhappy? Oh god no, they like life that way.

The idea that there's people out there living without artficial light 24/7, without being in a crowd of people constantly, without their entire family in one hab block.

That's freaky to them.

>> No.23871366


Necrons are "get off ma lawn you damn kids". They want their empire back and to get rid of all the usurping kids that have spread their crap around.

>> No.23871388

The impression I got is that Necrons are fine with the kids on their lawn if they are mowing it for them.

>> No.23871406

But would they provide lemonade after a day's work?

>> No.23871410

well, see, that is if they wake up. If the kids don't go freggen knocking on their door, they can play on the lawn all they want.

Also don't necron not really leave the planet they are on? I haven't heard much about necron star ships, I head they were just already there whenever they show up. Just sleeping underground.

>> No.23871411


Pretty much, and they're not wrong to view the Imperium that way. 40k doesn't really have good guys.

>> No.23871413

Not really.

Necrons will either enslave them or just wipe them out.

>> No.23871432

No. Back in our day, we showed our elders some respect! We worked for them for free, not for the promises of fizzy drinks you kids are always guzzling down! Too much sugar these days, that's what I say!
Slaves can mow lawns.

>> No.23871435

Nah bra, 6th ed specifically stated that some xeno races are adopted as slave labour/vassal states by the imperium.

Imperiums a diverse setting, People paint it all with teh same nazi brush. Deffinite nazi tones, dont get me wrong, but also worlds or cat people and tundra slogging abhumans and industrial worlds that cure all disease (and tick of nurgle in the process)

>> No.23871438

>don't necron not really leave the planet they are on?

Necrons can move between worlds, but it's somewhat limited. During the War in Heaven, they took over a small portion of the Webway that's now been sealed off from the rest of the network, but still allows them to move between Tomb Worlds and launch attacks on territory they don't claim.

>> No.23871460

Not really.

The Necrons have machines to do that. The slaves will be fodder to experiments and horrible stuff.

>> No.23871475

Or you can become a living history exhibit.

>> No.23871481

I remember something about the C'tan and Necrons wiping out the Old Ones in the Webway. It doesn't seem like small part, if they can reach into the depths of the Webway and kill everything there.

There is also a little piece of the fluff that says the current Newcrons have conquered a crucial spar in the Webway.

>> No.23871482

>Heretics actually believe this

>> No.23871484


Don't mess up xenos and abhumans. Xenos are aliens (ie. Orks, 'nids & all the things that never ever were remotely human to begin with). Abhumans are "xenos" that have (d)evolved from human stock (Ogryns, Ratlings, catboys &-girls, Dworfs, some stable "beastmen"). Those are given vassal status in the Imperium.

Also, there are AN EXTREME FEW fully xenos races who have enjoyed better treatment from the Imperium, mostly because they are more useful alive, and no particular threat. For instance, Jokaeros. But they are the exception and not the rule!

>> No.23871490

Jokaero and Grox get a free pass because they aren't even sapient.

>> No.23871495

They are non-sentient. Which makes them just animals.

No different than a Grox....well except that they can somehow create Technology.

>> No.23871497

Jokaero might be, it's hard to tell with them.

>> No.23871512

Can they even create new Dolmen Gates?

>> No.23871513

At the end of the War in Heaven, yea, the C'tan were able to breach the webway, which allowed them to reach the last of the Old One's fortresses. However, the Necrons then revolted against the C'tan - when the ensuring war was over, the remaining Necrons weren't strong enough to hold off the wrathful Eldar. This is what forced the Necrons to go into stasis, and in that time, the Eldar would have reclaimed large portions of the Webway taken from the Old Ones.

>> No.23871517

I think their already doing that. I think the suggestion is they made it to other galaxies, although obviously not in a united all crushing sense

>> No.23871529

I thought that was the Tyranids?

>> No.23871531


The Burning One gave them the knowhow, but it's not a sure thing that this information survived the Great Sleep.

>> No.23871536

The Eldar destroyed many of the Dolmen Gates and sealed off the parts of the Webway that they led to. The Necrons can still travel to pretty much anywhere in the galaxy, but they're denied access to places like Commoragh.

>> No.23871539

You are now imagining a hive world community banding together and gathering resources, then devoting them to a 'habs for feralworlders' foundation.

a year later, Chief Urstab is sitting infront of of a huge edifice of rockcrete, wandering what the shiny sky men wanted him to do with it

>> No.23871554


I think they should've fluffed it so that the same command protocols that kept the Necrons loyal to the Silent King kept them loyal to the C'tan, and they thought he wouldn't possibly destroy them because his race would destroy him for betraying them.

>> No.23871572

"Every time I snap my fingers, a death world child dies."

"'E's a Psyker! Get 'im!"

>> No.23871582

Tyranids are from other galaxies.

People suspect Orks have reached other galaxies, however it's hard to tell, and the main piece of evidence for it is innaccurate, as it relies on a probe which by the current era of 40k wouldn't have reached the edge of the galaxy.

>> No.23871597

There is no happy ending.

If the Orks, Eldar, Dark Eldar, Imperium, entire chaos forces, Necrons, and Tau all joined forces and had an immediate cease fire, there STILL wouldn't be enough bullets to kill of the Tyranids.

>> No.23871602

Chaos and whatnot seems to be really enjoying themselves. Orks are practically ecstatic about the fun filled ruckus that's causing all the W40K hullabaloo.

>> No.23871604

Actually, the Necrons are enough to stop the Tyranids, according to the Silent King.

Also the Necrons don't use bullets.

>> No.23871608

You could've fired it up the vertical plane. Or fired it at an orbiting dwarf galaxy from a nearby part of the galaxy. Or just put a warp drive and gellar field on it.

>> No.23871616

what about that fancy virus bomb?
How would Orks manage to get to inter-galatic travel while the Human's probe is still not even at the edge of their own?

>> No.23871627

>How would Orks manage to get to inter-galatic travel while the Human's probe is still not even at the edge of their own?

With grit, spit, and a Very Big Tin-Can.

>> No.23871629

Chaos is also Universal and have destroyed much of the Universe already.

About the Orks? A Necron Overlord comments that he isn't surprised when he discovered the Orks are still around since they have always infested the UNIVERSE!

Notice that he said Universe, not the Galaxy

>> No.23871631

>If the Orks, Eldar, Dark Eldar, Imperium, entire chaos forces, Necrons, and Tau all joined forces and had an immediate cease fire, there STILL wouldn't be enough bullets to kill of the Tyranids.
Eh, no. I know the fluff you're thinking off, and it only mentions that the Imperium doesn't have enough dakka to kill the Nids, but it doesn't mention any other faction.

>> No.23871640

The galaxy is a sphere sending it on a vertical path through the galaxy would achieve nothing

>> No.23871641
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>> No.23871664

The nearest Galaxy to Earth other than our own is the Canis Major Dwarf Galaxy.

It's 42000 Light Years away.

The Probe was sent out 14,000 Years ago, during the age of strife. At the speed of light, that probe wouldn't even be halfway there.

>> No.23871673

Actually, that's distance from the galactic centre. From Earth, it's 25,000 Light Years away.

>> No.23871677

Whoops sorry, was mistaken, it's 42,000 LYs from our galactic center. It's only 25,000 LY from Earth. So yeah, at the speed of light, it still wouldn't have reached it.

>> No.23871684


>> No.23871685

You just have to keep your fingers crossed that somewhere out there is a petting-zoo planet.

>> No.23871699


Such planet exist, they're called Pleasure World.


Problem is, you need a member card, and they tend to attract Slaanesh's attention, for some unkowable reason...

>> No.23871720

But it's undergoing accretion by the Milky Way. After 24,000-ish years, it could be closer to the galaxy. I don't know about astrophysics, though, and I am in no position to predict how it will move in 24 millennia.

>> No.23871728


That IS evil!!

>> No.23871758

They start as petting zoos, then move on to heavy petting zoos.

>> No.23871760
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E-evil? B-but I'm only allowing you to enjoy your petting even more, with better attuned senses, an extra pair of arms and an enlengthened tongue...

My feelings... You hurt them!

>> No.23871765
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More like a heavy-petting zoo.

>> No.23871767

Unless they fitted it with a warp drive to skip the parts of the galaxy they already knew about, in which case it could have...

>> No.23871772

Good thing Slaanesh probably gets off on hurt feelings

>> No.23871775


>> No.23871798

At least, until GW decided to fuck over the entire Scarus Sector with the Green Kroosade, destroying one of the best-developed sections of the entire setting.

>> No.23871807
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Uhuhu, I'll pencil it in for after lunch.

>> No.23871811

You only make people like that because you get off on watching them.

>> No.23871833

It would have needed a navigator for anything more than a jump of a few light years.

And I doubt a navigator would last 15,000 years adrift.

>> No.23871834

I don't think the Green Kroosade hit Gudrun, at least not that it mentioned in the fluff.

Also I think the Green Kroosade was done by Ork players in the Black Crusade campaign and wasn't GW's idea, at least not initially.

>> No.23871883
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If we're talking about peace, I've wondered why the other races don't just pack their bags and drive as far away from the Space Marines as possible. All the ones that can, anyway.

Eldar have no excuses. They have space cities they can pilot. Just fly away.

Tyranids should know better by now. It'snot worth sacrificing whole hive fleets just to crack a hundred space marines holed up in a fortress. There's only a million space marines and at least that many planets, though.

Dark Eldar are not compelled to give a fuck about anyone or anything. Just conduct raids on planets without Space Marines and there will be fewer Eldar causalities and more slaves.

The Tau have a problem. They're like a small kid in school, and Space Marines are insecure bullies who worry the Tau are actually smarter and have a better future.

The forces of Chaos should avoid Space Marines because Chaos should probably realize now that, for all their incredible powers, they're never going to win a direct conflict with a loyalist Space Marine. They need to focus on creating terror cells - floating, headless entities that Marines can't get a grip on.

Space Marines should get away from each other because:
1. They're the only faction people play anymore and they can't sit next to each other in a theater without getting in a fist fight.
2. Their strict non-combat training regiment doesn't leave much time for a shower. The drop pods must smell like salty rubber.

>> No.23871897

So it makes several short jumps?
Or, since 14,000 years before current era 40k puts it in 26M, at the end of the Dark Age of Technology, the technology could have been good enough to do without a navigator

>> No.23871909

Gudrun in Eisenhorn seems pretty peaceful. As everyone else said, not every planet is on the front line. Not everyone rebels.

Some planets are all Arabia, some are as varied as Earth in the present, and some are peaceful farm planets with Imperial citizens wishing to do their part.

>> No.23871914

>Tyranids should know better by now. It'snot worth sacrificing whole hive fleets just to crack a hundred space marines holed up in a fortress. There's only a million space marines and at least that many planets, though.

Unless the planet is vapourised, and all biomatter/useful materials destroyed, it IS worth the effort the nids.

Think on it this way - if they take a planet, and harvest everything from it, then they'll harvest all the nids that died to take it.

So even if they only gain a few grams of matter, they still come out on top.

The Impire would need to order an exterminatus on every planet as soon as the defenders finally fled/died.

>> No.23871919

>Also I think the Green Kroosade was done by Ork players in the Black Crusade campaign and wasn't GW's idea, at least not initially.

I don't honestly know the exact details of it. It did take out a lot of other worlds though IIRC, like Thracian Primaris and Lethe Eleven. The Lexicanum describes Gudrun as "on the brink of anarchy."

>> No.23871924

Inter-galactic travel is stupid writing even in a ridiculous setting like Warhammer.

Galaxies are essentially island Universes.

>> No.23871960

Craftworlds don't go that fast, but the Eldar are generally careful to avoid situations where Craftworlds are getting invaded. If they're fighting Space Marines there's usually a damn good reason for it, predicted by the farseers

Tyranids don't care about how many numbers it takes - So long as there is one hive ship left, all that juicy biomatter is gonna get recycled, their own as well as the space marines

Dark Eldar generally do avoid areas of heavy resistance, but no army gets to pick and choose every fight, eventually their luck runs out. Plus capturing Space Marines makes you a Big Deal in Commoragh.

Chaos Space Marines consider themselves better than the young whipper snapper Space Marines of the 41st Millenium and actively seek them out just for that purpose

>> No.23871963

The Imperial Guard would probably be safer if they were anywhere but near Space Marines. Imagine that their enemies did decide to die from their bad consciences. The Space Marines would still be around. Crazy, dogmatic superhumans trained to do nothing but fight wars, but Space Marines are still used to seizing and holding complete control over planetary governments. It's good having Space Marines around in case of disasters, but a whole other mess to keep them around forever.

Orkz never get a good fight from Space Marines. Never. The Orkz always think they will, but you have to remember that there will be six million Orkz on a planet at any given time, and only a hundred Marines show up. Yet the Marines still wreck the party and somehow topple the entire Waagh. For everyone who wasn't attacked by the Marines, the war must end in a disappointing fizzle.

The Necrons could take or leave Space Marines, I guess. I don't know much about their new fluff. Now that they're not on an eternal death march as per a programming loop, I suppose they can do whatever they want. I mean, they're robots. Why even engage in conquest? They'd be happy in a 2x2 room with a power charger. What do they need a planetary empire for, except for nostalgic reasons?

>> No.23871978

It puts it in the age of strife, when the tech priests were only just starting to think "hey, making copies of these STC printouts might be a good idea". And AI had proven disasterous.

And you'd probably need an AI to plot the warp jump course, activate the gellar field, jump, and then jump back at the end.

But let's say that's possible, you manage to make it to Canis Major by the current era. What that proves is that orks made it to the next galaxy over. Not that they're everywhere in the universe.

>> No.23871994

That assuming that the Prove wasn't looted by Orks or ended up on a Space Hulk infested with Orks.

>> No.23872009

Or it drifted into ork spores (one of the theories about ork space travel has space born spore panspermia) and there's now a grot living in it.

>> No.23872023

>Craftworlds do avoid situations that put the craftworld in danger.
I'm saying they should just completely leave the galaxy. The ships are self-sustaining. Why stay in the Milky Way with all the Space Marines running around, punching things with robot laser fists? I'm saying Eldar should go to a better neighborhood.

>Tyranids don't care how many numbers it takes. They recoup their losses.
While mostly true, energy is still lost in the form of heat. No matter how efficient they are, they still won't be 100% efficient. They've got to eat at least enough to replenish the energy they spend. Space Marines, on the other hand, miraculously, if anything, break the laws of physics by spontaneously creating energy. To survive as long as they do without establishing supply lines or traditional support, their over-hyped multi-organ bodies require suspiciously little food and rest. Space Marines are just a losing meal to the Tyranids.

>Dark Eldar can't choose their battles.
They totally can. I know it's a bragging note to enslave a Marine, but the webway and high technology warships they have let them choose their angles.

>Chaos Space Marines consider themselves better.
But we know they're anything but. Chaos Space Marines almost never win against loyalists. Head on conflicts turn into giant, hilarious SNAFUs for Chaos. They wind up like the Nazghul from the Lord of the Rings movie, where Aragorn shows up and kicks their asses in a ratio of six to one, despite the Nazghul being supernatural horrors. They're in the classic Cobra Commander situation. I know it would be unrealistic to expect them to realize that, but Chaos should at least step back and admit maybe they aren't better, and they should reevaluate their tactics.

>> No.23872032

The Craftworlders stay mostly because the craftworlds are limited to travelling in the Materium, because they're too big for webway gates.

And they kind of feel responsible for the whole Slaanesh thing, so they try and stop it.

>> No.23872047


>What do they need a planetary empire for, except for nostalgic reasons?
>a planetary empire for, except for nostalgic reasons
>for nostalgic reasons

Do you even Gauss?

>> No.23872048
File: 29 KB, 546x184, Tzeentch Lord of all..jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Chaos is out there in the Universe. They can escape Chaos, it's everywhere.

Slaanesh will forever be at their back and most of the Universe is in ruins anyways.

>> No.23872054


>> No.23872091

>The Eldar feel responsible for Slaanesh and want to stop it.
I know they do, but in virtually every appearance of the Eldar, a Space Marine shows up and throws a wrench in the carefully laid plans by just being, well, Space Marines! Space Marines don't give a fuck. They don't know what anyone is trying to accomplish. They just walk in a straight line through every enemy ahead of them, until they reach a destination where a VERY IMPORTANT enemy is waiting.

At which point the Space Marines either win by balls-out attrition, which tends to work because they have few if any losses during battles, or they fall into some really obvious trap, which they then walk right out of using the tried and true method of attrition.

I'm just saying. At some point, every other race in the universe should start thinking about their humiliating defeats, and they should start to feel humiliated.

I know the Space Marines borrow a lot from the heritage of the Romans. In fact, the 40k setting most resembles the Mithradadic era of Rome, where infighting, overtaxation, politics, and so forth were causing Rome to fall apart as they battled slave uprisings, enemies from Anatolia, Hannibal, revolutionaries from Spain, and so on. Rome really did kick ass left and right, and in the beginning, countries like Pontus and Carthage, among their greatest enemies, suffered humiliating defeats from head-on strategies.

People feel humiliation for a reason, though. It's so they feel bad about the dumb thing they did, and they start thinking about doing a newer, smarter thing. See?

It's time for the other races of the setting to feel humiliated so that they'll come up with better, more compelling strategies.

>> No.23872122

Also petting-zoo planets.

>> No.23872165


Have you ever considered what kind of universe you live in now?

Your mortal human existence is shorter than that of a sun, which is considered as less than a blink of an eye in universe-standards.

Since you are bound by physical boundaries and psychological barriers, you are unable to achieve anything truly grand in your time in this mortal coil.

Even with the constant turmoil of the cosmos, your end will be less than a quiet sigh. And the destruction of everything around you is hardly louder.

>> No.23872181

There are many reasons to get a planetary empire. Resources. Spreading your ideology. Neutralizing threats. Egotism.

>> No.23872183

Ah right then, we reach the crux of the matter.

The reason they don't leave is because they're not allowed to.

Space Marines are like that one kid who wants all the attention, gets violent, and doesn't know how to not be a jerkass, but parents feel sorry for him because he doesn't have any friends, so they tell everyone to include him.

So, if everyone just went "bugger this, we're out", the Space Marines would throw a hissy fit, and GW would demand everyone be nice and share their toys with Space Marine, and then blame them when Space Marine breaks them.

>> No.23872203

>Your mortal human existence is shorter than that of a sun, which is considered as less than a blink of an eye in universe-standards.

But there is a star that is 12 billion years old, IIRC. The universe is 13 billion years old.

>> No.23872221

Craftworlds aren't that slow. Altansar emerged from the Eye of Terror at the end of 999.M41 and is now rumored to be somewhere close to Terra, and that's quite a trip in a rematively short amount of time.

>> No.23872260

Just a little piece of information.

Craftworlds can use the Webway. There are Webway gates huge enough to allow huge vessels access.

>> No.23872272

The Necrons are pretty much compelled to conquer the galaxy. It's literally in their programming.

>> No.23872282

Huge vessels, but not craftworlds. If there were any craftworld gates big enough to let a craftworld in, they'd have been in major population centers. Which would kind of suck now.

>> No.23872292

That depends on the Crafteorld, though. The big ones, like Ulthwe, can't use the Webway.

>> No.23872304


No... No. No! NO! See, they're compelled to restore their ancient empire. They don't give a damn about the Galaxy of today, they want it back as it was when they left it. In a sense it's even worse, since it's basically impossible to restore the Galaxy the way it was all those million years ago. But still they'll try...

>> No.23872362

So they are compelled to conquer the galaxy.

>> No.23872367

Ok, so he was wrong about the stars being only a tiny fraction as old as the grand universe.
But, given that there are so many stars...
When one star blinks out here or there, it's largely an unimportant event.

>> No.23872388

>Is there even a potential happy ending?

Space Marines purge all the heretics and xenos.

>> No.23872418

They were going to exterminate the Tau when they were still a primitive culture, if there's no reason to leave intelligent xenos alive, then don't.

>> No.23872423

There have even been theories that the oldest stars might even predate the universe itself.

>> No.23872435


Well, I don't think the ancient Necrontyr empire encompassed the whole Galaxy, but you're missing my point. Conquering the Galaxy would be 'realistic', and some poor schmuck could get off the hook by swearing loyalty and fealty to the Necron Lord and be left alone as long as he doesn't mess up.

Restoring their empire is just impossible, and they'll go on murderhobo'ing everything in order to 'restore' their Empire, 'cause their batshit insane, and immortal robots. Baaaaaaaaad combinaison, mon!

>> No.23872444

>Is there even a potential happy ending?
Are there any worlds, or even cities where civilians live happily?
Such things are boring, though.

>> No.23872468

> ... a petting-zoo planet.
There is always the World of Quaddis in the Calixis Sector. Really nice place to visit, as long as you are very rich or your family has holdings there. Preferrably you should be both rich and have holdings. The great city of Xicarph can offer you just about any pleasure you can think of, and several which are unthinkable. I am sure that there is a petting zoo somewhere.

And for those who like the "heavy petting", the Beast House might be able to arrange a suitable form of entertainment, directly form the creature pits and slave pens of the Red Cages,

>> No.23872472

The Necrontyr Empire encompassed much of the galaxy.

>Restoring their empire is just impossible

Not really.

The Codex says that if the races of the galaxy don't stand against the Necrons united, the Necrons will conquer all and restore their ancient Empire.

Impossible? You got to be kidding.

>> No.23872486

They got taught how, so presumably they still know.

>> No.23872501

that theory can't be right. Don't be stupid.

Maybe older than the galaxy, but not the universe.

>> No.23872524

No I'm not kidding. Re-conquering their lost planets they won't have too much trouble with, it's the "restoring to the way it was before they went sleeping" who might be problematic, since

- Undoing a couple million years isn't easy
- Most of the Necrons don't even remember what their empire looked like.
- Some of 'em are so far gone their only goal in "life" is to purge the galaxy from every last living being.

As I sais, it's even worse: with a "regular" conqueror you could at least try to negotiate, wit a batshit insane immortal robot who barely knows what he wants, it's utterly impossible.

>> No.23872526

>Doesn't know about Humanity's new epoch of psionic mastery, a new age of wonderment and the dawning of a hitherto unseen golden age

>> No.23872559

>family comes from Noble House on Tarranias Prime
>finally get a chance to take wife and kids to Calixis Sector
>promise son to take him to galactic petting-zoo
>see sign for "animal water sports" and "donkey show"
>smile, thinking we've come to the right planet
>buy tickets
>stop in later that night
>leave after 3minutes with face a sickly shade of Nurgle green
>arrange for entire world to be eliminated due to 'false advertising'

>> No.23872571

>a new age of wonderment and the dawning of a hitherto unseen golden age
And also non-stop lawsuits from the guys that hold the copyrights on DUNE.

>> No.23872585

I don't think the Golden Path and the Scattering could be considered a golden age.

>> No.23872596

>As I sais, it's even worse: with a "regular" conqueror you could at least try to negotiate, wit a batshit insane immortal robot who barely knows what he wants, it's utterly impossible.


The majority of the Necrons leadership are not that crazy as to not remember their ancient Empire or to interact peacefully with the other races. Imotekh the STORMLORD fits the Conqueror type very well, having expanded his empire exponentially through hostile and peaceful methods.

Some Necron Dynasties share his methods. Often you would see Necron emissaries negotiating with alien races over the return of treasures and worlds of the ancient Empire.

>> No.23872617

i kind of like this ending

especially that ork bit

>> No.23872642

Amazing and magical ork adventure...
Oh, I like this one.

>> No.23872818

This. He was fun to toy with because he was in turn toying with /tg/. If you ever tried to legitimately debate him, I feel bad for you because that must have been infuriating as hell.

The only thing I hated about TIDF was the way he would so easily shit up the occasional civil tau thread merely by posting in it and turning it into a shitstorm of HURRESY fags trying to debate him.

>> No.23872829
File: 150 KB, 1318x1412, This is the end, my friend.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I liked this ending better.

>> No.23872836

But orks are already on an amazing and magical adventure called the WAAAGH

>> No.23872842

For the new people here around, could you possibly expand on who or what "TIDF" is/was?

>> No.23872855

>implying there ever was a civil tau thread on this board

As If...

>> No.23872877

Tau Internet Defense Force. He roleplayed a Water Caste and would always twist words and perform mental gymnastics to explain how tau were always good all the time and everything they did was the best possible thing ever. Fun to watch, but only sometimes. As amusing as he was, he wont be missed.
There were a few halves of one, but between spahss muhreens who cant make their own threads, that one guy who wants to argue about sterilization and ONLY about sterilization, and TIDF, they all get snuffed out about halfway down the thread.

>> No.23872885

Tau Internet Defense Force and the one redeeming feature the Tau fanbase on the board had.

I miss TIDF, anyone know where he went?

>> No.23872894

>We won't be missed
>I miss him

/tg/ everyone

>> No.23872902

I shouldve specified he wont be missed BY ME. Really, if he couldve reigned it in and only threw on the TIDF persona in threads that had already devolved into shit, I would have more respect for the guy.

>> No.23872914

Tau threads are born shit.

>> No.23872918


>But there is a star that is 12 billion years old, IIRC. The universe is 13 billion years old


>> No.23872936
File: 42 KB, 640x360, So this is nova reactor energy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Shoulda inb4d that, too, because I saw it coming from a mile away.

We had some nice ones with the Riptide leak, though, like when this got made in reference to the Nova Reactor fluff.

>> No.23872942

Story time: Happened to one of my players during "Tattered Fates".
Be a professional singer/musician/dancing girl.
Get high-paying contract for stage-shows in Quaddis.
Travel to Quaddis with manager and a supporting cast.
Make a few highly successful performances in Xicarph, and manager gets new contracts.
Amphitheatre stage show in a private holding, ~2000 nobles in audience.
Third performance is "blade dance"; acrobatic solo dance while wielding long-knives. A lot of jumping while spinning the blades.
At the end of blade dance, audience began to clap and call for main event.
Stage doors open, and a bear-sized war-beast is released.
Kill the war-beast. Two more war-beasts are released.
Audience begans to don night-vison masks and speak only on whispers.
Lights go out. War-beasts are blind and hunt by smell/hearing/touch.
Kill remaining war-beasts. Run towards audience, and jump over the wall with Parkour technique.
Jumo to the host's seat and stab both long-knives next to his head.
Shout "ARE YOU ENTERTAINED!!!". Audience loves it.
Get back to Xicarph alive. Go to hotel room. Talk with your manager about job security.
Manager says "Congratulations, girl, You just made me a lot of money."
Nail manager to wall with two long-knives.
Spend the rest of the evening by reading a book and watching manager to die slowly.

>> No.23872962

was that too Grimdark for Grimdark?

>> No.23872969

But he wasn't nice.

He was mean and rude to Xeno and any blueberry he ran across.

>> No.23872978
File: 651 KB, 1000x999, warhammer 40k Tau_Girl_Pile_by_Gannadene.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

MAybe this'll lure him back

>> No.23873008

Because people who like blueberries are faggots. So much so The Tau Internet Defense Force knows it.

>> No.23873167
File: 5.87 MB, 320x240, future.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23873176

I'm pretty sure this isn't entirely on topic, but seeing as this is the closest to a 40k lore discussion at the moment and I don't feel like making a new thread for just this question.

A friend of mine has it in his head that Dark Eldar can be corrupted by the Chaos Gods and that it is heavily implied that Vect is a follower of Tzeench (I have no citation for this). My immediate kneej erk reaction is that the Dark Eldar would not take to chaos corruption very kindly, almost like the Orks would. Could /tg/ maybe shed some light on the Dark Eldar and their relationship with Chaos?

>> No.23873192

They avoid it like the paugue because it takes them dangerously closer to having their souls OM NOM NOMED by slaanesh

>> No.23873206



>> No.23873212


Your friend is a retard. Vect expressly forbids magic in Commorragh because they are afraid of a demonic incursion.

Beat him with an agoniser.

>> No.23873221

>Vect is a follower of Tzeench
His fluff describes him as a mortal Tzeentch. It doesn't say he follows Tzeentch

>> No.23873239


Yes the idea of the two of them comparing notes on the fine points on how to make a extremely convoluted plan to bring low their opponents is... frightening... to say the least!

>> No.23873250

Arhra fell to Chaos, apparently.

>> No.23873258
File: 134 KB, 744x1072, dark_eldar_incubi_by_zahnib-d466fgt.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


He may or may not be Drazhar.

>> No.23873485

Thanks for the input.

>> No.23873498


Does he also burn with the dark flame of Chaos?

>> No.23873524

He kills anyone who tries to venerate him as Arhra though.

Of course, he kills anyone who doesn't as well.

Mainly, he likes to kill things.

Probably, it's hard to get his opinion when he never talks.

>> No.23873534

The Incubus mythology on this then has him torn apart by those loyal to him, to avoid his legacy becoming tainted. These then went on to become the Incubi.

>> No.23873546


Drazhar lives only to kill.

>> No.23873598

So do others across the stars. He is not special in that regard.

The real question is...for whom he kill for!?

>> No.23873623

Can a Dark Eldar become a Young King? These Incubus guys act like the Aspect dudes.

>> No.23873649

Theoretically, but unlikely. It would involve Incubi and Craftworlders to be allied, and for the Incubus to be the most worthwhile candidate.

>> No.23873684

Dark Eldar don't have access to Avatars at all? If not, can't they just steal one?

>> No.23873697


>> No.23873752

Well, Khaine's shards fell in the Materium, so they didn't reach Commoragh.

The Dark Eldar could try though, sneak into the core of the craftworld, into a chamber that's connected to the infinity circuit and attempt to open the door behind which the Statue of Khaine resides. Of course, anyone who ventures in there dies, which might be a bit of a problem.

>> No.23873792

So Avatar shards made it to Exodite Worlds?

Good they can take over an Exodite world and use its Avatar.

>> No.23873806

I'm not sure they did. The Exodites don't generally go in for human sacrifice. They tended just to end up on Craftworlds.

Still, if you found one on an Exodite world, enjoy being destroyed by the Bloody Handed God.

>> No.23873815

Newcrons aren't that bad depending on the Overlord

>> No.23873905

Means the same thing, dumbass.

>> No.23873950


Hmm... More like 50 shades of bad, starting at "get the fuck outta my lawn or die horribly!" to "Must... Kill... Everything..."

But yeah, its a MAJOR personality step up from the oldcrons!

>> No.23873958

no less regard.

Double negatives.

>> No.23874032

Irregardless is a word that is used by the undereducated to sound more intelligent than they actually are. Similar to expressing how little you care about a topic with the phrase "I could care less about..." when the phrase the person meant to say is "I couldn't care less".

>> No.23874039

Your friend really doesn't know what he's talking about.

>> No.23874069

Why do so many people think that Eldar can turn to any god they like? Slaanesh has dibs, so why would it matter?

>> No.23874174

There are instances where other Gods claimed Eldar souls.

>> No.23874205

Of course there are happy endings.

Like, for example, my current group is playing Rogue Trader and I rolled up a Treasure for them to find, using Stars of Inequity's treasure generator. Rolled 7 (Gear and Tools), 6 (Navis Prima), 8 (Xenos Technology), 1 (Ramshackle), 10 (Best Craftsmanship), 7 (Trusty).

Thus, the Explorers now have the privilege of discovering a priceless and completely accurate set of maps and starcharts... made by an Ork Wierdboy. with locations such as "DA PLACE WIT DA 'UMIE GITZ DAT GOT ALL DA GUBBINZ" for them to look forward to and "DA BIGGEST FIGHTZ EVA, ALL DA BOYZ KEN GET SOME" for them to avoid. It is carved out of solid rock and could easily be used as a bludgeoning weapon, and considering the bloodstains it probably already has been.

Now tell me that isn't a happy ending.

>> No.23874232

>Why do so many people think that Eldar can turn to any god they like?
Because the Laughing God already does it? And in fact can straight up swipe souls literally dedicated to Slaanesh already?

>> No.23874279

>All dat
I'm stealing this item.

>> No.23874419

May I suggest reading The Shape of the Nightmare to Come and The Age of Dusk, a couple of rather good fanfics based around the premise of 50k onwards.

>> No.23874428

Holy shit I thought I was the only one to read those two.
>all those epic as fuck moments in Age of Dusk that somehow make the fluff make sense

>> No.23874448

Then URL me.
It's not like I have anything better to do.

>> No.23874470


May also want to search around on the BL Bolthole for The Eridani Records.

>> No.23874524

A bunch of one-shots too, some are okay. Actually thought the Eridani Records was some weird Sci-Fi mary sue but I guess it was supposed to be like the Culture/Foundation. Interesting premise anyways, and its kinda noblebright (which I like).

>> No.23874684

Portmanteau of "irrespective" and "regardless". Check the etymology.

>> No.23876401

I'm loading up http://www.heresy-online.net/forums/showthread.php?t=51806&page=1 now. Let's take a look.

>> No.23876474


Ha, when was the last time you saw the use of the term 'beardy'?! I remember the Fat Bloke editions of White Dwarf - fucking halcyon days my friends!

>> No.23877334

Thing is, most Eldar can't just join up with him however or whenever they like. The Harlequins all have to go through a ritual that no other Eldar even knows about.

>> No.23877370
File: 75 KB, 351x378, BCMTankcommander2 Kopie Kopie.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23877386

Only Nurgle and Cegorach, IIRC. And, in the case of the former, the Eldar were all inside his realm when he turned them into trees. They didn't turn to him.

>> No.23877445

The Harlequins go through some sort of ritual to pledge their souls to Cegorach, and there's not even a guarantee that it would work with other gods, as Cegorach is an Eldar deity who could be argued to have a stake in their souls due to that fact. And the Solitaires are not dedicated to Slaanesh, they just don't enjoy the guarantee of having their souls go to the god they are dedicated to when they die.

>> No.23877470
File: 512 KB, 500x1291, Tau conversion process.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Just propaganda, Shas. Theres no way we would give those dirty guela the good stuff.

>> No.23877800

On the note of that: How do i convince my fellow DH player that psykers are not in fact looked up upon as gods or good helpful citizens?

Can't come up with anything and lexicanum just says they are weary around them but i know they are at least considered as some kind of mutant.

>> No.23877962

>How do i convince my fellow DH player that psykers are not in fact looked up upon as gods or good helpful citizens?

Show them accounts of witch burnings.

>> No.23878107

You know i tried to put that out but he simply said no to it, but next seession... i think i'll actually try again.

Thanks man

>> No.23878385


Policy towards psykers in the Imperium ranges anywhere from to complete and utter loathing to barely tolerated.

The only ones I've seen who act differently towards psykers are some Inquistors, but usually they turn out to either be psykers themselves or radicals.

>> No.23878445

>complain about plot armour in 40k

>> No.23878544

It dependfs. psykers are rare so most people dont get to know them. I imagine some guard regiments eventually get to like the guy who can flip tanks with his brain

>> No.23878568

>40k Galaxy
Pick one. Which is kind of the point, no one is happy, no one is a good guy, and really; the only difference is how honest each army is about their own personal flavor of being shitty.

>> No.23879974


is she supposed to be a "guesalva"?

>> No.23880609

I think you mean guevesa, though now I want to see a bunch of tau slavs squatting about in track suits.

>> No.23880676

good stuff!
)am continuing to read)

>> No.23880862 [DELETED] 

And then a daemon comes out of his brain.
Because grimdark.
>You know it would happen

>> No.23880878

And then a daemon comes out of his brain.
Because grimdark.
>You know it would happen

>> No.23881198

Head daemons killed Santa Claus

>> No.23881335

And the Easter Bunny.

>> No.23882152

Are you guys reading this WARHAMMER -- 50,000 stuff...? It takes the concept of "grimdark" and thrusts it forward with a fury!!

>> No.23882886

read nao!

>> No.23885678

The playerbase hasn't gotten any younger. You have grown older. 3rd fag here

>> No.23887937

Bumping this treasure trove of win.

>> No.23888982

seriously, guys, for all two of you that are reading this...
read the linked stories.
i think i'll post them to 1d4chan myself later they're so good!

>> No.23889340

I finished reading it.
There was even an amazing twist-ending.
Read up, boys.

>> No.23889734


You win. never have I seen a more corny and feelgood post when it comes to this subject. It's not overdone but it still completely inverts 40k.

10/10 made me cringe.

>> No.23889824


>> No.23890303


Yeah? Try the main course: http://www.heresy-online.net/forums/showthread.php?t=51806&page=1

>> No.23891056


>> No.23891084

There are paradise worlds that are practically heaven.

But yes, the canon says repeatedly that ideal end for the Imperium is that mankind evolves into a fully psychic race able to make the warp its bitch. Until then, the Emperor is riding it out until he can finally die.

>> No.23891135

Yes, and once humanity gains universal psychic capabilities... what will follow will become known as THE AEON OF MASS SUICIDE.
As no man in the Imperium of Man is ever able to get laid because women are now able to read their minds.
Conversely, every attempt by a man to read a woman's mind results in a brain hemorrhage.

>> No.23891186

>Psychic defences

>> No.23891211

And that's why there is no inter-galactic travel in 40K. Lurk moar.

40K actually does a really good job of portraying the sheer scale involved in anything to do with the entirety of the Milky Way galaxy. Even if the writers can't into numbers, the tone and implications are perfectly accurate.

>> No.23891312

>And that's why there is no inter-galactic travel in 40K.

Nids and the Old Ones.

>> No.23891394

40K's biggest problem is that the Imperium of a million star systems - give or take a few hundred thousand - was set in stone way back when star systems with planets in them were thought to be rare. Now, with thousands of exoplanets discovered, it looks like that planets are more like a norm than an exception.

In a galaxy with 100 billion star systems, most of them having planets, controlling one million of them makes you a regional power at the most, even if you exclude the most obviously uninhabitable regions (Eye of Terror, other Warp rifts, the galactic core due to the radiation, etc.).

On the other hand, if we stick to the ~1 million figure, it just proves that the Orkoid race really is the dominant lifeform in the galaxy.

>> No.23891410

The Old Ones originated in the Milky Way galaxy, and nobody knows if they really left or just all died.

As for Nids, their extragalactic origins are pretty much just a narrative tool to emphasize their fundamental alien-ness. The only thing that really matters is that they're now arriving at the Milky Way. Nobody is going to backtrack to their home galaxy and punch out the Hive Mind.

>> No.23891458

>when star systems with planets in them were thought to be rare
But they aren't necessarily inhabitable planets. Even considering how many were probably terraformed during the Dark Age of Technology, it's just not likely that we managed to colonize even half of them. And also considering the spottiness of the "map" of human control over the galaxy, and the fact that warp travel effectively allows you to skip over vast tracts of realspace, it is entirely probable that there are quite a few star systems and planets that nobody has even discovered yet.

>> No.23891675

>backtrace to their home galaxy

>> No.23891691
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Do you really think there's such a thing even in fiction as psychic defences sufficient to standup to a woman on a warpath?

>> No.23891823

>The Old Ones originated in the Milky Way galaxy, and nobody knows if they really left or just all died.

But they had an intergalactic network, so they could travel to other galaxies.

>> No.23891844

>40K's biggest problem is that the Imperium of a million star systems - give or take a few hundred thousand - was set in stone way back when star systems with planets in them were thought to be rare.

In 40k universe, canon has always said Imperium was always only controlling a small fraction of the galaxy's total volume.
Codex Imperialis from early 90's:
>The lmperium of Mankind is spread across almost the entire galaxy and consists of more than a million worlds. Although this is a huge number of planets it is as nothing when compared to the immense size of the galaxy. The Imperium is actually spread very thinly across space: its worlds are dotted through the void and divided by hundreds, if not thousands of light years. It is therefore wrong to think of the Imperium in terms of a territory which extends across the galaxy. The truth is far more complex. Within the galaxy are countless alien civilisations, many separate Ork empires, and vast areas occupied by the Tyranids or given over to Chaos. Most of the galaxy remains unexplored. Who knows what secrets lie undiscovered among the stars? Undoubtedly there are other advanced civilisations, lost human colonies, and the ruins of long dead races waiting to be explored.

>> No.23891905


>too good and kind to be credible

Someone needs to read their depiction in Deathwatch then.

>> No.23892031

I still play to have fun
I field khorne berzerkers
Seriously who wouldnt do that unless they want fun

>> No.23892071

The webway is not intergalactic. The Eldar would have up and left already if that were so.

>> No.23892091

It was, it got sundered during the War in Heaven.

>> No.23892165
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>"In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war."
>Bitches about constant war and hostility
Get out of here.

>> No.23893032

heh. it still would be nice for there to be an endgame where"where the good guys win". (though good guys would have to make an appearance first)

>> No.23893471

That's what head-canon is for. Don't like it? Play a different game.

>> No.23893549

What's "head-canon"?

>> No.23893581
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the canon you put in your head

>> No.23893634

it might be the 41st millennium before GW moves the plot forward

>> No.23893678
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Maailma anyone?

>> No.23893730
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Ja, is bloody good idea to me!

>> No.23893923

Im sure he has a heavy-petting zoo, too. And its filled to the brim with felinids.

>> No.23893962

... I am 12 and what is this, and namely why does it have a Finnish name?

>> No.23893978

I always thought the "greater good" meant they did everything for the benefit of the public, rather than religious dogma or some other grimdark way of life. Then I found out the "greater good" means being an ethereal drone, no questions asked. Laaaame

>> No.23894003
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D'hohohohoho, Maailma is some of the biggest troll-bait this side of 40k headcanon, here, let me get you a link.


>> No.23894036

The Ethereals know the Greater Good better than you, friend! Obey them, for the Greater Good!

>> No.23894041
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why do you fucking Founders keep bringing this shit up? Let it die unloved and unpraised like it should

>> No.23894320

Azariah Vidya claimed the souls of the Eldar would go to Khorne when he had Typhon Primaris blown up.

>> No.23894322

Hahahaha!! Bastard! I was going to make that joke!

>> No.23894330

But a Keeper of Secrets took a ride in one.

>> No.23894457

kind of surprised that Maailma doesn't get much hate anymore; I remember when Anon came out with his headcanon stats for first-world derived Expeditionary Regiments, all anyone could talk about was how there needs to be more Sino Line regiments and Afrikans Conscripts

>> No.23894529
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>tfw nobody even made the Sino and Afrikans Regiments, not even that Anon

>> No.23894572
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I only haven't made them yet because I need to buy the book in hard copy format; otherwise it's just not fun. Also, would anyone be averse to power armored (see Dark Heresy light power armor, not Deathwatch), over-equipped, under-trained, UN peacekeeper regiments?

>> No.23895087

And to think all of that asshatery started because somebody mentioned in another thread that the location of fictional Terra was off-kilter by a spiral arm or two.

>> No.23895518
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Eh, Boomer put it best:
>Aye, but sending a nuke at a titan of any type, without the titan noticing and using missile defense, is nearly impossible. And if that doesn't work, the imperial navy will not mind blasting our infrastructure and converting us into another fuedal medieval level agri-world.

>But the imperium is more subtle and we are a lot more set up to accept "Holy shit, WE'VE BEEN MEMBERS OF A GALACTIC EMPIRE THIS WHOLE TIME!? Here's your 'tithe' of millions willing to go anywhere else but this planet, and here's some prime barren locations to blast holes in we can fill with hive cities, and yes please gladly retro-fitting your space tech for things like underwater cities. Oh, and God of <Most Religions> is real and says I am right and is in charge? Fuck yes! But what about atheists? God was an atheist too!? This just gets better and better!"

>...the marketing capabilities of the Imperium are just too good. As nice as our western civilization is, the shitty, outdated, rusting Imperium technology is still far superior to our new shit.

Any Maailman unit would be the Scrappy youngster regardless of how much in-house veterancy they've got. We'd be the loner and loose cannon, not quite suited to the battlefield of the 42nd millenium, but capable of pulling a hat trick when we see the chance for it and occasionally not having enough experience to see when we're screwing ourselves with our own tactics. Arrogant, but mildly lovable for our grit and zeal.

>> No.23895631

Well the fact that you have the possibility of falling in love, raising a family, and passing information on to the future generations (shut up Snake) is a happy ending anywhere, in any 40k faction

Technically the happy ending is that during 13th black crusade, something will happen to the Emperor, and hopefully he'll return to life as himself or something more, thrash ALL the enemies of man ever (tau, chaos, eldar, etc.) and humanity will be able to go back to the ideals of the Great Crusade.

If you're Tau, humans are sterilized, conscripted or forced labor

If your eldar or chaos, everyone's dead or dying

If you're orks, you already got it

>> No.23895789


>the happy ending is one where you don't get eaten by tyranids

Do you even 40K?

>> No.23896156

Well that IS a bit anti-climactic...

>> No.23896221

>humans are sterilized

I'm an Orkfag, and I wish that trotting out this old hashed-over disinfo resulted in an immediate dick punching.

Tau engage in eugenics for the Greater Good, not mass sterilization of everyone for teh lulz.

>> No.23896245

It's outright stated in Deathwatch that populations are regularly sterilized so they don't grow too much. I'm sorry, but cutting your balls off for the Greater Good still means you got your balls cut off.

>> No.23896884

>implying we wouldn't be better off if we put that into practice in real life

>> No.23896964

No, we wouldn't. The world isn't even close to overpopulated.

>> No.23897145

Maybe not.

But if you spend just 5minutes on /b/...
it becomes hard to argue that the gene pool doesn't badly need to be chlorinated.

>> No.23897166

That's eugenics. A different thing.

>> No.23897222

that's not nature, that's nurture

all good breeding gets you is physical fitness and subjective attractiveness boosts, possibly some increases in pace of learning and application of concepts, but mental attributes are much harder to distil into distinguishable genetic lines

>> No.23897293

Except intelligence is objectively a thing that can be decided by good genetics.

>> No.23897325

[citation needed]

>> No.23897348


>> No.23897439

And you know what happens when you try to play geneticist with people? Insanity and ruin.

Maybe in a couple hundred years when we know what the fuck we're doing with the gene pool but we've just mapped the thing out.

>> No.23897707

>And you know what happens when you try to play geneticist with people? Insanity and ruin.

Except we've not really tried.

>> No.23897746

B-but we am play gods!

>> No.23898260


> The population of any given [hive] world approximately doubles every 100 years. With each hive housing between 10 to 100 billion people and 5 to 20 hives per planet, the sheer number of Imperial citizens on a Hive World is staggering

> Most Hive Worlds started out as relatively hospitable places to live but have become severely polluted, the areas outside the hives reduced to ash wastes or radioactive desert by the never-ceasing industry of the great cities.

>... each hive creates millions of metric tons of trash and industrial waste that is directly pumped out into the surrounding world's environment. Given the massive population of most Hive Worlds, this means that their surfaces are usually reduced to industrial wastelands covered in toxic deserts where nothing can live or grow ...


>> No.23898295 [SPOILER] 
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Just sterilize the /b/tards already...

The likelihood of a bad-side to doing so is... remote.

>> No.23898311
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>> No.23898333

>Enjoy your plot armor while it lasts, xeno

So forever?

>> No.23898352

No, no, some always survive any purging- and they are definitely going to give out your phone number to the entire internet if they survive.
How many crank call pizzas do you think you can take, anon?!

>> No.23898379

You're weakening your own position, here.

>> No.23898606
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Co-operate with us, citizen of the imperium. Your initial attempt to demonize the tau is understandable given your indoctrination, but to continue this intellectual defiance in the face of such evidence as >>23898260 would be foolhardy.

>> No.23898624

Two words my dear boy; ethnic cleansing.
Whilst purges of ethnic groups deemed undesireable by a government is often politically motivated, there is always an undercurrent of racial supremacism present; the idea that one people deserve to breed and propogate over another because they are naturally superior.

This is essentially an indirect form of genetic manipulation, though one that works via sociology rather than biology.

>> No.23898644


When the choice is between Hitler and Stalin it's better to look for a third option.

>> No.23898681

It's more similar to a choice between HitlerStalin and Big Brother.

>> No.23898696

Chaos is always hiring.

>> No.23899005

Better our evil empire than theirs.

>> No.23899083

I do not understand - "Hitler" and "Stalin"?
Come now, Gue'vesa - pledge yourself to the Greater Good, and live a life of peace and prosperity.

>> No.23899673

How do you figure that? We may not be "overpopulated," but there are still too many damn people on the planet as it is. What do we need seven billion people for? The species will survive just fine with only five billion.

>> No.23899753

Then rid the world of one human and kill yourself.

>> No.23899851

Its almost as bad as the whole ork tech is fueled entirely by orkish wishes and clapping rather the WAAAGH field being little more than psychic WD40 thing.

>> No.23899915


>> No.23899931

Why do you automatically assume I think genocide or mass-murder is a viable option? I just think that if we as a species intend to live solely on Earth without colonizing other planets, we need to ensure that overpopulation will never become a problem. "China already tried, it doesn't work!" I hear you say. Well, a one-child policy with added cultural preferences for one gender over another WOULD fail. A two-birth limit (but unlimited adoption options) per spousal pair would keep the global population stable. Obviously we'd need a world government and a baseline quality of life as prerequisites for such a limit, but if we could even arrive at that stage without destroying the species beforehand, we'd probably have recognized the need for population control anyway.

>> No.23899976

But the WD40 nonsense is bullshit.
An ork managed to fly a crashed, broken plane to the utter bafflement of the Tau Earth Caste.

>> No.23900011

It just looked crashed and broken because thats how ork architecture looks. Yes, there is totally some green fairy magics going on, but its power is so heavily exaggerated by /tg/ its ridiculous.

>> No.23900052

No, I mean he fucking crashed, was captured, broke out, then flew away his wrecked plane.

>> No.23900167
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Orks build em tough.

>> No.23900207

You're being willfully blind now.

>> No.23900474

Actually, what we should have is a one-son policy.
If society had a surplus of females...

The jealousy and misery that underpin the lives of men worldwide (neckbeards, very notably) might very well cease to exist!

>> No.23900562

I suppose. I would have to read the story youre referring to, but an ork crashing his plane, fighting for a bit, and then deciding to get the zog out of Dodge sounds like a totally orky thing to do, and most people seem to think ork tech runs on wishes even when its fully intact, so them confusing a functional ship for a broken one doesnt surprise me.

Secondly, a single ork wouldnt be mentally powerful enough to run an entire plane solely on WAAAAGH. Its a communal effort.

>> No.23900604

They examined it and confirmed it completely unable to fly.

>> No.23900678

>They examined it
Once again, that's precisely my point. Most engineers from other races cant tell a functioning piece of ork tech from a broken one, admittedly because the differences are slim. That one techpriest in Xenology declared the perfectly functioning ork shoota as pure magic, after all.

>> No.23900718

And the Earth Caste aren't dogmatic tech worshipers, they're scientists.
Further, you are confusing a piece of /tg/ fanfiction with actual canon, because I know exactly what you are talking about.

>> No.23900802

>Further, you are confusing a piece of /tg/ fanfiction with actual canon, because I know exactly what you are talking about.
Really? Because I coulda sworn the excerpt I saw was from Xenology where he basically says the whole damn thing is little more than a mess of wires that shouldn't work.

Either way, all I was saying is the WAAAGH isnt ALL ORKS THINK THE EMPRAH IS A WARBOSS NOW WAT DO like /tg/ sometimes acts like it is. The exact amount of influence it does actually have over their tech is obviously still up to debate.

>> No.23900870

It's a lot more than the "psychic WD-40" bullshit.
By all rights, most orkish tech DOESN'T WORK.

>> No.23901438

Yeah, except the goal isn't to create real-life Gor.

>> No.23902331

Galaxies are not spheres and specifically the 40k galaxy is not a sphere. There's not even much of a galactic bulge.

>> No.23903678

What is "Gor" and what would be a "real-life Gor"?

What I was describing would be paradise.
Even women would probably enjoy it more because they'd have that many more women to be in the company of.

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