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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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23741066 No.23741066 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Have you ever seen a party self-destruct when confronted with the Orc Baby dilemma?

>> No.23741114

Still evil aligned.

>> No.23741140

wait! there is a dilemma about it?

>> No.23741163

Have seen the kids moved to an orphanage though, even though OOC the players acknowledged that the church who runs the orphanage will probably abuse the shit out of those kids, the chars had little reason to believe the people devoted to a good-aligned deity would see orc kids in anyway separate from human kids.

>> No.23741170

Sure. What seasoning do you use?

>> No.23741172

Left the babies and the women behind, along with the rogue guy.

>> No.23741174

Yes, who's the Orc baby's daddy.

>> No.23741186


Hope you have an hour to waste.

>> No.23741192

Groak Half-Orc! Groak will be new warchief and make sure that kids and women safe and not make problems.

>> No.23741205


No, my players always just kill 'em all.

>> No.23741213

don't worry, I don't watch shit

>> No.23741226

You can not play the game without accepting the rules in their entirety. Orcs are always evil.

If you homebrew that they aren't you have introduced contradicting elements and it's no wonder glitches show up.

>> No.23741235

This makes me think of a fantasy version of Springer.

>> No.23741252
File: 1.08 MB, 850x945, kobold smoke.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Wouldn't necessarily work in the setting I'm using at the moment. There are no arbitrarily evil or good races. Everyone is neutral by default, their actions afterwards define their alignment.

>> No.23741279

>a fantasy version of Springer

There's a comic that did a fantasy version of Oprah.


>> No.23741283
File: 141 KB, 900x900, Smite hunger.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I would still eat the kobold eggs.

You gotta smite ALL the evil, boy.

>> No.23741289

That's no fun. You can't commit genocide because you will fear that you might kill some good guys.

>> No.23741323

But it's for the greater good.

>> No.23741335


>> No.23741347

Shows what you know.

>> No.23741372

>can't commit genocide
>no fun
You're one of those Chaotic Evil players, aren't you?

>> No.23741408

To be fair, Lawful Evil can also commit genocide, and often far more efficiently.

>> No.23741412


... that's not how RPGs work, broseph.

besides, the orc baby problem is so dependent on what the PCs know about the world, and what work they have been contracted to do.

>> No.23741415

Lawful good all the way. Smite the evil all the day!

>> No.23741420 [DELETED] 

This. Alignment is still a thing in my PF setting. But no one pays it any real attention. Action defines alignment. The party won't kill an orc tribe unless said tribe is legit pillaging and raping across the countryside instead of trading/hunting game/etc.

>> No.23741516


What rules? Certainly not D&D rules, as they make it very clear that orcs are not always evil.

>> No.23741517
File: 111 KB, 896x504, 1357226697904.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Tell the Paladin that the babies have already tortured and burned alive a kitten in their free time.

>> No.23741571

>tortured and burned alive a kitten in their free time
then we should call the internet hate machine. They will hunt them down and we can go back to do adventurer stuff.

>> No.23741594

no my players arnt shit, we have 3 orc babys, and 4 kobolds following our party being useful as hell.

captcha ledgmbil strengthened

yes captcha, my ledgmbil is much strenghtened

>> No.23741607

>Fantasy Leejun
The mental image of a bunch of wannabe wizards in doofy masks telling each other stupid jokes over a scrying pool network and avenging kittens across the realm made me giggle.

>> No.23741617

But you did murder pregnant orc women?

>> No.23741640



besides, most of them don't actually know how to make new magic.

If you can't hack out a spell, you aren't a true WIZARD.

>> No.23741652


You know, in my game, my players genocided the Orc race in a lawful good way. What they did is that they turned ALL of the prisoners-of-war into innocuous forms via Baleful Polymorph, then simply released them.

Basically, while the warriors were executed, the others were permanently transformed into birds, deer, fish and cut loose. This was later known as a act of divine mercy, and the day became a holiday called 'The Ceremony of Ascension'.

>> No.23741679
File: 129 KB, 703x666, thrones1lh01.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


That's a good question. Should we spare or execute the female villain of the campaign if she's pregnant?

>> No.23741682


>implying that's not as bad as bad as execution, if not worse

>> No.23741685

Yeah that was horrible. Some wanted to fry them and other to cook them.

>> No.23741710

My next BBEG.

>> No.23741738

Let her carry to term, then execute her.

>> No.23741751


This is a glorious and evil idea. In 24 hours, you've effectively destroyed a species.

And saved the environment! This is one of the things that seem benevolent on the surface, and only gets really horrifying if you think about it.

>> No.23741767

>You have lost all your intelligence
>You are now an animal
>Your soul is forever that of an animal
>Your god won't take you to the afterlife with your ancestors because you are an animal
>You'll just cease to exist

>> No.23741769

nope, they also follow us

which is good, all 5 of us are bards. so its the aquabats being followed by orc woman and babys helping fight stuff, and kobolds stealing stuff from locals

>> No.23741777


What if she's about to unleash her spell of armagedom, or whatever, should the Paladin fall for killing an inocent even if it was absolutely necessary?

>> No.23741810

He will do this because it's necessary. And then fall because it was evil.

>> No.23741831


>killing an innocent
>implying an unborn child counts as an intelligent creature

>> No.23741832

not unless he loses faith in himself

>> No.23741835

Oh boy here we go. Only took 42 replies.

>> No.23741843


Then he'll have to go on a quest or something, and they'll cast the Atonement spell on him. He'll be fine. Sometimes, you have to take one for the team.



>> No.23741848

Doesn't he need some kind of permission from VanCanto to use that song? Okay, it's a cover, but I can't imagine there is no kind of copyright friction there.

>> No.23741871
File: 187 KB, 1200x839, anti-anti-heroism2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

5 bards? Hey, I remember something like that.... Is this you guys, or is it just a coincidence?

>> No.23741880

Does this mean that abortion is evil within d&d?

If it isn't, then there is no problem with executing the evil pregnant bad guy.

>> No.23741894


In all fairness, we really fucking hating orcs by that point. We couldn't recommend a mass slaughter, so this was a merciful solution.

Also, whenever we found noncombatants? BALEFUL POLYMORPH, SUCKERS. I just love the idea of explaining, calmly and with utmost reasonableness:

> "No, we didn't wipe out your race. We just...changed them. Not one was harmed; They'll live out their natural lives as...not-Orcs."

>> No.23741899
File: 116 KB, 500x561, Paladin_button.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23741956
File: 178 KB, 566x677, 1357830291411.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>That feel when little magic would made you a good guy.

>> No.23741988


Is it really such a big deal? There's Atonement, isn't there? As long as you have a genuinely good reason, you can't truly fall.

> "Yes, I killed a pregnant woman. However, she was about to unleash horrors that would cast all the lands of Middle-Earth into darkness, and bring about an age of suffering."
> "Also, she killed two of my friends. I tend to take things like that personally."

>> No.23741995

is that so? *push button*

>> No.23742014


Even the Paladin survives the adventures, he must fall (even off-camera).

>> No.23742074

Personally, I'd only give him Atonement if he arranged for the resurrection of the woman. In fact, I'll make that a prerequisite for every paladin who kills someone they shouldn't.

>> No.23742096
File: 431 KB, 555x764, ondonti.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Orcs are always evil.
This wasn't even true in Grog Edition.

>> No.23742118

Whatever. They are orcs. They don't deserve to live.

>> No.23742133


Why shouldn't he have killed her? I mean, it needed to be done. She was about to unleash the SPELL OF ARMAGEDDON.

>> No.23742202

Our DM did this to us, once.

My Ranger had a wicked awesome tree fort, though, and I made the orc ladies move in and take care of the place. As it turns out, orc slaves stop hating humans when you let them roll around in giant piles of treasure and give them fine furs and fresh game.

Also we made lots of half-orcs.

>> No.23742239

That's why he gets a shot at simple atonement at all.

>> No.23742293
File: 270 KB, 900x1273, yoi.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

And by what authority do you determine our right to live or die? Zarus? The Burning Hate? The God-Emperor? Your xenophobia and hatred will make enemies of the entire world, and it's a fight you cannot win.

>> No.23742300

As long they don't attack, or brandish weapons even murder hobos tend to leave them alone.

>> No.23742353


>> No.23742402

Agree with the guy who wants to spare them and then kill them all or doom them to starvation when he isn't looking.

>> No.23742440

I may be a human, but I agree with you. Instead, Orcs, Humans, Elves, and beast races alike should be a part of a glorious, unified empire.

>> No.23742594

What if someone tricks the Paladin with a spell that allows him to fake the "voice" of the Paladin's God or his church?

>> No.23742610

They left them for exposure

I pulled a twist where it turns out one of them managed to survive and grew up to be a bloodthirsty warchief whose only mission was to hunt down the people that killed his family. He lured them into a trap he set up. Basically he was sending small raiding teams to harass trains on the frontier. This fucked up the local economy and caused all the frontier towns to furn on each other because lolcitystatepolitiks. In the ensuing chaos the Warchief decimated the countryside (unbeknownst to the party it was him) and attacked a large mercenary compound hub. Killed all of the extremely skilled soldiers/wizards/sorcerers/berserkers and made off with all the records an after capturing a few half elves and making them teach him how to read, he tracked down the party wizard to one of the wizard guilds frontier outposts where the party was staying. The party had no idea it was rampaging orcs causing all the chaos and thought that it was an invading nation state to the south that they had previously had trouble with and knew had wanted to colonize the frontier.

He managed to kill everyone just by himself with his massive battle axe, including decapitating the paladin that killed his mother and twin brother. He also eviscerated the wizard who had started the fire that burned down his village and strangled the rogue who had arranged the deal to clear Orc enclave from the land for railroad development.

Everybody except the half Orc ranger who he was killed by after a climatic struggle on top of a burning/collapsing wizards tower

One of the best fuckings I have ever DM'd.

>> No.23742639

what about an illithid baby
mind you it's probably still smarter than your average PC

>> No.23742640

My axe, my ancestors and my beard you dirty greenskin!

>> No.23742718

Illithid babies don't really exist. They have nonsapient tadpoles that eventually infest the skulls of captured humanoids and transform them into full illithids.

Unless the elder brain is killed, the city is abandoned, and the tadpoles are as well. In which case the tadpoles start eating each other until only one is left, at which point it eventually crawls out of the pool and starts preying on the brains of whatever it can catch, growing bigger all the while. When it eventually eats a sapient being, it suddenly gains sapience and psionic powers itself, becoming a neothelid. They're very rare, but also quite terrifying when they're met; they can spray acid out of their tentacles that dissolves all organic material except for brains (which they then eat), among other powers.

>> No.23742768

so "kill it" is the answer

>> No.23742787

In theory, but since the tadpoles live in the same pool that the elder brain lives in, you'll have far, far bigger problems to consider.

>> No.23742795

How would you handle a religious war between the churches of two gods + the king with every side having their own Paladins and holly warriors?

>> No.23742836

Kill in the name of your god, the other god is evil and needs to be smiten

>> No.23742851

>I killed my players using an overpowered NPC
Cool story bro.

>> No.23742869

nonono the correct answer is to ascend to godhood yourself and destroy the other two gods, unifying the country

>> No.23742886

Oh thats easy. A true paladin, when faced with a command by his god that defies his personal moral code, tells the god to go fuck himself, and switches religions.

My LG Cleric once served a demigod of sunlight. When I met her, and figured out she had done something extremely Evil (Willingly turning people into undead as part of an experiment), I bitch slapped her.

As in, I walked up to her throne, took out my bitch hand, and slapped her divine bitch face.

Do you even Justice?

>> No.23742906

The orcs are evil are evil because the gods say so. End of story.

>> No.23742923

The party loved every minute of it, especially being chased up the collapsing building onto the roof.

It was fun and they all agreed they had a great time. I also did it to teach them that sometimes actions have consequences and I even warned them about wiping out the village.

>> No.23742929

True Lawful Good never kills evil, only converts it to good. So, make sure the Orc babies grow up to be good.

>> No.23742938

>I killed my party using an overpowered NPC to teach them a lesson

>> No.23742941
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>> No.23742959

>Alignment: Orcs tend toward lawful evil, half-orcs tend toward true neutral, PC orcs and half-orcs may be of any alignment.

Straight from the Complete Book of Humanoids, AD&D 2nd. ed.

>> No.23742967


Aren't they abominations even from the Illithid's point of view?

>> No.23742974
File: 82 KB, 420x450, 62f628fc7a64eb2f7382c2b2c51b6033.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Heheheeheh no.

Sometimes beings aren't redeemable. Murderers. Rapists. Daemons.

You kill those fuckers.

Baby orcs?

I take "Usually CE" as a challenge.

>> No.23742981

The answer's obvious; dash the baby's heads against the nearest wall and rape/impregnate every fertile Orc woman you encounter.

Keep this up and you'll eventually breed out the Orcishness of that tribe, assuming they continue to live in the general area. Granted, you'll be dealing with Half-Orcs eventually, but rape THEM and you'll get quarter-Orcs, which are more or less hairy, muscular Humans.

>> No.23743006

You there.

Why aren't you smiting >>23742981 ?

>> No.23743007

The moral of the story is to never leave a job half-finished!

>> No.23743009

If you can't even redeem a daemon, you're not trying hard enough.

Don't worry though. Even though you've lost your way, you can also be redeemed.

>> No.23743011

You kill them. All of them. Then put their heads on pikes all over the land.

>> No.23743034

Yeah this guy falls. And is Evil. And he smells.

Fuck this guy.


>> No.23743054

>not killing the orc women after you finish

Where did you learn to genocide?

>> No.23743062

Beings who souls have been entirely consumed by raw elemental Evil, and you say they can be redeemed? Maybe a few, in rare circumstances, but by and large, if something has hit the evil event horizon, they CAN. NOT. BE. SAVED.

You naive fucker. I white knight and look up to Superman, but you've crossed the line seperating Lawful Good from Lawful Stupid.

What's next? Teaching pacifism to Bloodthirsters?

>> No.23743095
File: 840 KB, 960x1360, 1361517174019.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Oh noooo, I'm totally helpless, I bet any big, strong Paladin could penetrate my defenses easily with his Holy Avenger

>> No.23743120

Kind of, but then, not really. We burn a lot of villages, but we don't kill kids. It's not a mercy thing, it's a lack of interest. Children deprived of their parents will either find new tribes, or starve to death. As our mission is destroying all of the local tribes, sooner or later they'll run out of places to flee to, and die. They're a problem that resolves itself.

I don't know what we'd do if they tried to attack us with little kid-swords or something, but it hasn't happened yet. Until it does, let the knits make lice, that just means we stay employed longer.

>> No.23743121

Probably. However, you are helpless, and striking you down now would be wrong. Let's get you cleaned up and into some more... dignified clothing.

>> No.23743124


Wait what? I thought this was a general dilemma that any PC could be faced with, not something just for Paladins.

Besides it makes sense from a logical standpoint; remove the growing generation and replace it with increasingly placid ones, it's not my fault the method is extremely fun.

>> No.23743145

Try harder. Anyone can be saved. If they have freedom of choice, then they can choose good. If they don't have freedom of choice, then you give it to them.

And it would be Stupid Good.

And good isn't necessarily pacifism. Bloodthirsters can use their martial skill to entertain the masses. And teach children how to stay in shape.

>> No.23743152


Why would you kill the Orc women? You need them to have (Human) kids.

>> No.23743159

No. Fuck No. As I heard from my french teacher, You Play, You Pay.

>> No.23743180
File: 170 KB, 850x966, 8760465c20fc2b7edf5392ba402dd59d.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Mmm, yes, I love to dress up.

But the best part is taking it all off at the end~

>> No.23743182
File: 26 KB, 488x366, AngryMob.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Should one kill the angry mob of peasants after they learn that the Paladin left the orc babies alive? Who do you react if you are cornered and the peasants are clearly a danger to your PC?

>> No.23743183
File: 304 KB, 564x800, 1356940172903.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Some people have more fun converting than they do killing.

>> No.23743186

They'd always be part orc, not human.

SOMEONE needs to go back to genocide school.

>> No.23743208


>> No.23743214


That's what round 2 of the Rapin' is for.

>> No.23743218

So you're saying they should have killed EVERYONE in the village?

>> No.23743230
File: 724 KB, 1056x1047, 30493224606e6dc29470eba09e552687.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Ooh, I've died so many little deaths. And if you want, I can help you do it too. <3

>> No.23743239


Why do sweaters make boobs so much better?

>> No.23743246
File: 380 KB, 800x1131, 1337622630582.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Darling, I've died so many little deaths... and I can help you do it too, if you like~!

>> No.23743265
File: 139 KB, 580x800, 6266396b57925323d0aae3e18f4be9e94d26ae92.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I don't know, why don't you take a closer look?

I certainly do.

>> No.23743270


Why are their wings on the middle of their backs instead of the shoulders.

>> No.23743278
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>> No.23743290

See? This is one of the reasons you redeem instead of killing. These ladies would be much better on the side of good.

>> No.23743298

It's like wrapping presents in blankets.

>> No.23743299
File: 106 KB, 336x360, 1339057255067.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23743311
File: 789 KB, 686x1143, 1361164147613.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

It's true. I was one of them, once.

>> No.23743314

Help Me? Die? What?

>> No.23743322

Aerodynamics. The center of balance for a horizontal humanoid body is around the lower back; thus, the wings are placed where they will provide the most direct lift. Putting the wings on the shoulder blades is like lifting a bus by one end.

>> No.23743329
File: 328 KB, 769x1000, cb90692c29706e3d73cea8115debe2bee40d1c08[1].png_67.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23743337


AKA, she wants to fuck you so hard, your heart stop for a moment when you orgasm.

repeat this several times.

>> No.23743343

Can a succubus drain your life if you use protection?

Oh, no reason I ask in particular. Just curiosity.

>> No.23743344


But it looks stupid.

>> No.23743357

"Petite noir," or "Little death," is french slang for orgasm. She's saying she fucks a lot.

>> No.23743361
File: 699 KB, 850x1133, 1360585411217.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Would you like to unwrap your presents~?

>> No.23743364
File: 232 KB, 863x752, 1337114944518.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.23743384

You're lying. We all know you used to be an incubus.

>> No.23743394

Wow, what dicks.

>> No.23743403

Likely, they found a way to by pass that.

But Succubus don't drain your life away.

Otherwise, them having sex with any male will result in the male running away or killing self most of the time.

>> No.23743406


It's great that they had a good time and all, but it still sounds like you set them up against an impossible-to-defeat foe just because you didn't like how they handled that orc camp.

>> No.23743407
File: 261 KB, 455x527, 1360773848697.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

What's going on in here?

>> No.23743409

>implying they aren't the same being
Learn 2 mythology, anon.

>> No.23743425
File: 237 KB, 1024x576, 1361169703630.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Sigh. Yes, it's true, I was an incubus before I was redeemed. But neither gender of Fiend is beyond redemption.

>> No.23743433

Where are those hearts coming from. Do they have mass. If they do this is shitting all over relativity.

>> No.23743437
File: 67 KB, 426x341, 1347390395408.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>large breasts under clothing
>bare shoulders
>long hair
>painted nails

>> No.23743439

Dilemma? Why would anyone argue for the murder of children?

>> No.23743464
File: 229 KB, 500x316, awesomeboner.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>black-and-gold eyes
>just barely visible panties

>> No.23743466

Why did turning you good turn you female? Are dicks evil or something?

Or did they have to remove the tools of lust from you?

>> No.23743467

you have children you should be taking care of. seriously lotte would be so much less messed up if you gave her more attention

also, why isn't everyone making helms of opposite alignment en mass
also, why aren't angels breeding with absolutely everything to turn the entire planet into half angels and aasimars, ensuring almost every soul born after is Good

>> No.23743468
File: 118 KB, 654x1000, eb71b6caae0b5dee6ce71abd8b7a3fc9ee1d34f9.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I have a Master's Degree in Magic. Don't have to explain shit.

>> No.23743480


Eh, GM forcing Consenquences like that due to morals is a bad GM.

Some Actions don't have an Consenquence otherwise, Evil would never win and Good will always win.

You Know. Middle Ages, Empires, Christianity during the dark ages and other shit. They lived and die without suffering from their actions.

>> No.23743484
File: 24 KB, 854x480, bighead2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Are dicks evil or something?

>> No.23743507
File: 217 KB, 600x572, e4a6b028c58f5581b33ea78d1ca04a58057f2026.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]



Hand in your GMing license, fucking now.

>> No.23743513


Everyone knows that children are the most pure and cruel creatures on the face of the planet. That's why children soldiers are so effective.

>> No.23743530

Speak for yourself, I personally deliver Smite Evils to the succubi...

...With mah penis.

>> No.23743549


There are always consequences, somewhere. Somehow.

>> No.23743573

>also, why isn't everyone making helms of opposite alignment en mass also, why aren't angels breeding with absolutely everything to turn the entire planet into half angels and aasimars, ensuring almost every soul born after is Good

Opposite alignment helms are expensive compared to killing people and using the money on stuff. Besides, that shit doesn't stick.

Second, fucking and leaving kids without parents is pretty bad, and if angels stuck around they would not be able to perform their other duties.

>> No.23743595
File: 192 KB, 995x745, zardoz3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

The penis is evil! The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life to poison the Earth with a plague of men, as once it was. So speaks Zardoz.

>> No.23743602

So, if the objective of evil is to corrupt all creation, why don't devils and demons use child agents to not only corrupt the children of the mortals but also to slowly drill and erode the morality of the common people until people lose their instintive barriers and morals towards the act of killing younglinks?

>> No.23743613

leave the kid with the mortal parent. or hell, just act as a womb/seed for couples that want to have kids

>> No.23743621
File: 195 KB, 1024x576, 1361169981010.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

They thought it might provide me a lesson in humility. It's sort of like turning a hawk into a rabbit.

>> No.23743643

...now I kind of feel like a dick for outing you like that.

Is there any way to perform penance?

>> No.23743646
File: 29 KB, 305x278, half orc.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


If they had gone against the will of their gods, maybe divine powers saved one so he could later get revenge.

If they had been rolling dice to root out hiding children to slaughter them, and missed one of them, sure that's acceptable also.

Okay Sean Connery

>> No.23743652


I cannot imagine a greater insult than having my predatory nature stripped from me. How do you live?

>> No.23743684

Turnabout is fair play. Hold still.

>> No.23743706
File: 330 KB, 643x1000, 1356455128262.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Yes. By redeeming other Fiends, thus do we repay the debt we owe to the celestials that saved us.

I'm working on redeeming a succubus at the moment. We're... close.

>> No.23743730
File: 78 KB, 600x836, memory_by_a6a7-d42afwp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>Despite being banned by the Laws of the High Kingdoms, the forcible recruitment of Child Clerics are a serious problem in some kingdoms on the edge of the undead wastes where lawless theocracies and mercenary churchs will abduct children from defenceless villages and induct them into their clerical orders, using them as low level skeleton fodder to aid in the ongoing wars with, and raids upon the dark kingdoms.

>> No.23743731

So what you are saying is you are being punished by being made into a female form?

That to have a female form is a punishment by the forces of good?

>> No.23743762
File: 58 KB, 480x555, birth of a supervillian.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

And so anon became a serial killer in hopes of becoming the little girl.

Nice job, Good!

>> No.23743765
File: 345 KB, 1279x1354, 1331718929541.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Oh, it hurt... Sometimes it still does. But you learn to see things from another angle.

>> No.23743770
File: 840 KB, 833x1570, Warforged_Grappler_WIP_by_volrathxp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Self does not see the reason if they are orcs or not matters, they are flesh, as are the humans, the dwarves, and even the elves.

>> No.23743771

That's not what she's saying at all. Stop trying to start something unpleasant.

>> No.23743781

Oh, I know exactly what you mean, I love looking at all the angles.
Speaking of which, could you turn around a little bit?

>> No.23743785

There is no dilemma anymore.

Shit was cleared up by 3.0, killing orc babies is vile tier. Even most always evil races have infanticide as a vile act.

The only exception is if the evil is not of society or temperament but cosmology, like a devil baby. Otherwise you must respect the potential of an innocent, even one of always evil, to become a less harmful version of evil (There is a reason priests of say, Tiatmat, are permitted to exist in society, they make good bankers!) or even overcome its always evil nature.

Orcs are "often chaotic evil." Do you know what that means? It means that roughly half of all orcs are chaotic evil, meaning that it clearly is not required or even likely genetic for orcs to be evil. Hell, in canon the PCs surely know about half orcs (Who usually are not byproducts of rape) and non-evil orc tribes, which are moderately common. The idea of having to kill an orc infant on principle should make a paladin vomit a bit in his or her helm. It should make the chaotic neutral rogue fucking shout at you and call you a sick fuck and throw sand in your eyes. It should make the city guard, if not arrest you for your actions in a cold war, be terrified of you and think ill of you. Killing a child explicitly to commit genocide in 3.5 is vile, an action abhorrent even to evil characters.

>> No.23743827

Actually, >>23743762 had it head on.

The wages of good is more labour and a pat on the head.

To be redeemed, it seems, is far more... Rewarding.

>> No.23743902


>Killing a child explicitly to commit genocide in 3.5 is vile, an action abhorrent even to evil characters.

Projecting much? I'm sure the people of the town who gets raped every generation by orcs would agree with that. Orcs are not real people, they are monsters that must be destroyed at all cost.

>> No.23743929


Too bad, it's RAW. The second you argue, you're house-ruling and thus your point is invalid.

>> No.23743965


I'm going to need sources, page scans, or some other form of official documentation to support pretty much everything in your post.

>> No.23743984

New minor bad guy character concept; person who was neglected so attempts atrocity to draw a celestial, in order to surrender and be redeemed by it.

>> No.23743993


Excelent. Now I will corrupt all reality with my evil force of possessed babies. Son all reality will sucumb to evil because killing babies is an evil act. Nobody can stop me now!

>> No.23744026
File: 1.81 MB, 344x402, 1363309359185.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

PTSD is a hell of a bitch

>> No.23744051

I'll unpossess your babies.

Then turn you to the side of good.

>> No.23744085


>turn babies

>> No.23744155

My usual methods won't work here. Can I just stick with the succubi?

>> No.23744166

>Orcs are not real people, they are monsters that must be destroyed at all cost.
Go fuck yourself.

Orcs are just another sentient race, and end up stuck with the "hurr evil villain" shtick. There are numerous cases in Fantasy genres where Orcs (or even Goblins) are not the go to bad-guy fodder, and actually good, or at least Neutral. Kingdom of Many Arrows is a good example from Forgotten Realms. As is Discworld, where Pratchett's viewpoint has been "If Humans can fall, then Orcs can rise (to good)"

>> No.23744208

Sure. But they only hang out with good people.

>> No.23744269

The right course of action is to sell them into slavery. You get money and they have the oportunity to prove their worthiness to their new masters.

>> No.23744345


What is the angle of prey aside from the predator's talons?

>> No.23744421

Usually about 30 degrees from the zenith.

>> No.23744681

Atonement doesn't work unless you are actually sorry and apologetic for what you did.

>> No.23744791

This. It is a divine forgiveness that restores your powers and abilities granted by external powers. You still need to be sorry and atonement isn't required for traditional guilt.

Wow you can't even be bothered to read the monster manual explanations for what "Always, usually, often" means? Or book of vile darkness, which was directly referenced?

You shouldn't ask for other people to do research when you clearly can't even be assed to open a book.

RAW disagrees and explicitly mentions "real people" orcs.

>> No.23744939

>Be GM
>Dark Heresy
>Ordo Xenos
>Inquisitor has sent them to investigate a planet that's lost contact despite an utter lack of Warp Storms.
>Players arrive to find Kroot there, setting up a colony.
>Fightan time happens
>Afterwards, players encounter a weird sort of nest thing with a hatchling Kroot in it.
>Tech priest finds it utterly adorable for some reason and wants to keep it.
>Other players want to kill it.
>Tech priest argues.
>Blammed for Heresy.
>Kroot hatchling killed and eaten.

>> No.23745027

Eating Xeno Flesh is HERESY!

>> No.23745059

The players agreed that Kroot are no more than animals, and thus eating them is no different from eating any other animal that didn't originate on Holy Terra.

No one was around to disagree with them.

>> No.23745079


Wouldn't eating kroot flesh probably mess with your genetics?

Also how did you kill it? Go into detail.

>> No.23745125

Kroot adapt genetic traits from stuff they eat, but there's no reason to think the other way around works too.

They gave it a laspistol bolt through the head. Killed it, skinned/plucked it, cooked it over an open flame, served it up.

>> No.23745164


Yes, sweet death of the innocent. Such casual cruelty. And to consume the flesh afterwards is divine. I certainly hope it wailed for its mother upon the eve of its death.

I would quite like to meet your players.

>> No.23745214

function over form is how nature does it

>> No.23745226


>> No.23745234
File: 169 KB, 550x594, 1357480452337.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Whelp. But I liked being a guy!

>> No.23745304

Sadly I moved away from that group a few months back and lost contact with most of them.

Haven't gotten a chance to play Dark Heresy since

>> No.23745309


What if there was a sexy Lich, who had cast some great evil death spell

and the only way to save the world was for the paladin to fuck the Lich

Could he fall for giving the Lich the D?

>> No.23745376

Has the Paladin specifically taken an Oath of celibacy/evil-celibacy/necrocelibacy?

If not, then no.

I just had reason to use the word "Necrocelibacy."

I have shamed my family. I'm gonna go commit sudoku.

>> No.23745380

Lawful hot dickings, anon. Always within alignment.

>> No.23745390


Unfortunate. I do enjoy such stories.

>> No.23745473

Here, have a story.

>Players are your usual assortment of adventurers.
>Exploring the woods because they're weird and thought the enchanted woods might have loot.
>They come across a large, circular fort; the wall itself is fifteen feet tall, solid smooth granite. The fort is shaped like a massive skull. A sign is posted outside a gate.
>"Welcome to the FORTRESS OF SKELETUDE, home to the NECRODANCER. All who enter, bring grand music or beware!"
>Players decide to infiltrate it.
>After several failed Climb checks, the party's Barbarian gets frustrated and simply throws the Rogue over the wall.
>"Roll a strength check to throw him."
>Rogue smacks his head on the wall, takes about half his health in damage, rolls over the wall and takes fall damage, leaving him at about four HP.
>Wizard realizes he has Spider Climb and Levitate prepared.

>> No.23745490


But that has no infanticide at all.

>> No.23745516

No, since I have no qualms on killing Orcs.

>> No.23745550

Sadly. It's still funny though.

>> No.23745552

>Orc Baby dilemma
mercy killings are best killings

>> No.23745745

That's...that's kinda creepy.

>> No.23745776


>> No.23745882

>Killing orcs ever
Why? I just march into orc encampments, demand to see their leader, and beat the shit out of the first one to challenge my authority, then roll intimidate. When I get my meeting with the leader, I use diplomacy to explain to him why their actions are not acceptable, and lay out their options for becoming contributing members of society. I then offer them the contact information of the nonprofit organization I've created to help bandits, orcs, and other groups judged to be menaces to society get their footing and helpful, contributing people. And then before I leave I intimidate the leader again and remind him that if their liaison judges that they haven't made significant progress after six months, I will personally and publicly execute him and replace him with someone of my choosing.

That said, I don't often deal with this problem. It generally takes the threat of a nearly unavoidable apocalypse to get my character out of bed.

>> No.23745900


You are a good man.

>> No.23745998

Do you even Catan, Plouton?

>> No.23746057
File: 27 KB, 325x265, challenge_accepted.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>teaching pacifism to Bloodthirsters

>> No.23746095
File: 602 KB, 248x212, 1340339718539.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

....so what would happen if an Illithid tadpole was placed in an Aboleth....?

>> No.23746122

Doesn't work on non-humanoids.

>> No.23746143

Wow. I just got reminded of a string of threads from years ago. Get a load of this.


This is a thread from a player asking how to exterminate orcs because his campaign is some sort of colonial race war thing, and his character got killed by orcs during a riot. He talks about the shit that's happening, how much he hates the orcs who are super-unlikeable Dominic Deegan style noble savages. He gets some advice, it's all pretty grim, but funny in a sociopathic sort of way. This wouldn't be worth writing home about by itself, but then....

Then this happens:

In this thread, the DM comes in a few days later, and asks for advice on what to do to his players, when they've now followed /tg/'s advice and executed a bunch of orcish priestesses. Turns out he had made the orcs to be totally unlikable so that the players wouldn't side with them, because he's an asshole. Someone tells him that one of his players asked for advice on /tg/, resulting in him getting guidance for being as much of an axe-murderer as possible in-game.

But THEN it turns out that the DM is John Galt, the Riddle of Steel guy, (at least I think it is,) and that not only isn't this kind of dog-raping unusual for his players, but it's happened within the last couple of weeks, which leads to this thread being linked:
Wherein the players fight the Hobgoblin Mongols by sending human wave attacks at them until they shut down like Killbots. (Figuratively speaking, that is.)

I just... I can't even. This is what happens when you get every HFY nut in /tg/ into one group and let them play a campaign.

>> No.23746214


You get a half illithid, which is really just a failed illithid. Only humans produce true mindflayers.

>> No.23746272

TL;DR x3

>> No.23746338

I forget what they're called, but I know illithid tadpoles can be placed in Ropers to produce half-illithids, so the humanoid rule is out.
And there's different kinds of half-illithids with different abilities based on what the host was. If an Aboleth could be used as a host, it would probably be the scariest thing in the D&D world.

>> No.23746942

Orc baby dilemma is downright retarded.
>Sure, those people killed my father, mother, all of my clan (for HONORABRU types) but in the end they gave me to an orphanage and everything was okay!
i mean, really, you expect something other than revenge plot in this situation?

>> No.23748756

coincidence. none of us knew the others were going to be bards also until our DM started laughing

>> No.23748788

ooooh, so you get to descide who deserves to live and who doesnt? and i bet the world would be way better if you were in control. and that people just dont GET your mind.


>> No.23748825

murderers and rapists arnt babys though. you can raise babys to do cool stuff instead of dick stuff

>> No.23748845

if there trying to kill you then there being evil

smite there cocks off

>> No.23748846


Does Gentle Repose work on a fetus? Alternatively, what are the statistical reasons for a baby dying when its mother dies? It hasn't been reduced to -10 HP, so it must be Con drain. Can you Greater Restoration an embryo every turn for 9 months until its self-viable?

>> No.23748869

Wouldn't that be "Petit Mort"? Petit Noir should mean "little black".

>> No.23748902


Not once. I prefer to not be a faggot and not play with faggots, so PCs tend to have a general idea, whether stock enemies are a blight on the world that cannot be reasoned with, or just pawns of the true evil/savages doing usual savage stuff.

>> No.23748915

>OP makes a thread about the prisoner dilemma
>Thread devolves into arguments over what is right/wrong/evil etc

I think this is the most meta I've seen /tg/ be...

>> No.23748933
File: 80 KB, 750x600, 1287894558565.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Better to be slain by one you thought a friend than to slay one might be.
>If good was safe or easy, you and I would be out of jobs.
>Thy faithfulness has been rewarded brother! For tomorrow, thou art a father with thine vows of chastity upheld!
>The sisters of Seawatch Convent raised an elf over a few hundred years, how hard can this be?
>Oy laddie, I'll bet ye tewn'y silvers an a keg o'me father's brew I kin teach this lil' bugger te hammer blades like a true son o'Boatmurdered!

>> No.23748940

You must be new here...

>> No.23748951
File: 146 KB, 648x480, 1350756877415.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>pushing your own ideas of what is good and evil on others
>forcibly converting others into your religion's tenets or have them face death
>trying to justify your actions by saying it was for the greater good

>> No.23748962


6 years actually, maybe I just don't come on at the right times.

>> No.23748972

Guys. Really. I wanna know.

One cradle.

Two of these.
One with Greater Restoration, one with Cure Critical Wounds.

Then one of these on the fetus' finger.

Can you Jerry-rig an incubator?

>> No.23748990

Nope because as a DM I do my best to avoid it and when Daemin (the only other DM in my group/area worth hanging out with) lines it up I'm always ahead of the party and I just hide the bodies or burn them quickly so it won't affect the party's mentality.

>> No.23749015
File: 3 KB, 300x57, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Sell them as slaves.
They live, they are punished for teh crimes of their people, they have a chance to make up for the crimes of their forebears.

We've got one DM who pushed us into the situation and he did not like us when we came up with the aforementioned solution. I thought that he was going to cry when one of the the black guys in our group said it was a fantastic idea.

Oh, Captcha, the DM's name wasn't Todescr, but damn close guess, skippy.

>> No.23749050


Well, there might be a few reasons for killing orcs in my campaign. Maybe PCs just were in a village after an average orc raid, and are a bit pissed after burying most of the villagers. Particularly as almost no one of them died easily. Maybe PCs realize are even more pissed, because they tried to make a treaty with orcs just the last year before said raid, and now found that younger orc warriors just don't give a fuck about treaties, and there's no one in the orc society who can reign them in. Maybe PCs known for a fact, that orcs are hardwired to enjoy violence.

>> No.23749070

Naw. Chaotic Good is more likely to be like "fuck preconceived notions" and try to raise intrinsically evil creatures as good.

>> No.23749085

I wish Sanctify the Wicked wasn't so balls-impossible to afford regularly. I'd leave a wake of Sanctified Chromatic Dragons in my path,

>> No.23749099

>The right course of action is to sell them into slavery.

Actually in the sort of settings where orcs aren't likely to be biological killdrones, this is probably not only the most viable, but also the most humane option.

>> No.23749159

>one of the the black guys in our group said it was a fantastic idea
Confirmed for Uncle Tom.

>> No.23749166
File: 28 KB, 198x180, skullknight.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I had a lawful evil knight that chopped off our assassin's hand for trying to kill some.

Might makes right, but to prey on children proves you are worthless. Let them grow stronger, when they can try to prove their beliefs with a strong arm and matured mind.

>> No.23749176

>True Lawful Good never kills evil, only converts it to good.

Paladin's signature ability is "Smite Evil", not "Convert Evil".

>> No.23749200

Yeah mate. Adult orcs are a better game than the little ones!

>> No.23749219

>all these fucking wannabe roleplayers who can only think in D&D alignment or western suburbanite morality

Have you ever considered that characters completely different from current society would have completely different morals and you should try roleplaying along those instead of appeasing some naggling feeling of political correctnes? No?

Your worldview is limited as fuck, for the lack of better words /tg/. Read up on some history, how different cultures can be even without bringing races into it.

>> No.23749278

>What's next? Teaching pacifism to Bloodthirsters?
Holy Fucks, you can do that?!?!

>Why did turning you good turn you female? Are dicks evil or something?
Yes, yes they are.

We shall save these babies with delicious Sororitas Breast Milk!

>> No.23749311

Moral relativism in any form other than justification for total amorality is inherently self-contradictory. And truly different cultures cannot coexist until the dominant one forces the weaker one into accepting its core values.

>> No.23749313


>> No.23749345


The problem is that the Orc Baby dilemma ONLY works in those contexts.

For the players to be blindsided, it would imply that there's a gamist assumption that every orc they meet is evil for convenience and that they'll only encounter fully grown combatants, logic be damned. The players by default can't think about where the enemy comes from or what kind of motives they have.

This only really works in a system like DND where even if how they work is described, you only ever meet them as enemies and they all have a convenient tag of "evil" so no measure of complexity ever factors in.

A character with simplistic morals being forcedto meet a situation they aren't mentally ready to handle is the ENTIRE PREMISE.

>> No.23749378

I stood idly by and watched helplessly as my party slaughtered a tribe of kobolds, women and children included. My objections were duly noted.

Its okay though, cause they all got eaten by a dragon while I ran away.

>> No.23749400

And then different tribe of kobolds capture and eat you.

>> No.23749435


Different morality systems exist. On earth. Right now. And fuck no, morals are relative to the culture.


Sheltered idiot.


This only really works in a system like DND where even if how they work is described, you only ever meet them as enemies and they all have a convenient tag of "evil" so no measure of complexity ever factors in.

Then.. dont do it? Every single game I DMd was without a moral system and guess what, PCs were able to discern the morals and motives of NPCs even in different cultures without any dice throws, just DMing.

>The problem is that the Orc Baby dilemma ONLY works in those contexts.

Then there is no dilemma because the orc baby is automatically evil under game rules. You arent roleplaying, you are rollplaying and you are trying to pass it as extremely deep moral choices.

>> No.23749449


Sounds like it. They would have lived had they slaughtered them all da wa.

>> No.23750432

>Favorite character is a half-orc knight.
>Was forced to take an oath making not only him, but his children vassals of a noble.
>Refuses to have children because they would be born into servitude.
>Would totally take an orc baby, raise it as his own giving it a life and teaching it honor and nobility.

>> No.23750594

Alignment is crap in dnd anyway. Good aligned characters run around destroying hundreds upon hundreds of creatures but it's ok because we are good and they are evil. Morality does not compute with that world.

>> No.23750607

My first party self-destructed when confronted with the baby dragon dilemma. Good times.

>> No.23750670

Leave a male, the female and the babies.
let them repopulate and get hired again later to slaughter them again!
fuck yea for neutral

>> No.23751164

First thought

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