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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.22975490 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Tell me about your romances.

>> No.22975499

Do you mean in games, with other players, or just in general?

>> No.22975521

A scarred-up ranger who has a crush on the elven bard.

He doesn't know she's a girl.

>> No.22975533

Rolled 36

>>22975499
first one, then the other, and if it applies both at once.

>> No.22975535

>>22975521
>elven
>doesn't know she's a girl
How would you even tell?

>> No.22975557

I've never roleplayed romance. I'll let you know when I get my gf to play.

>> No.22975579

>>22975521
It's an elf, so it's not like that really matters.

>> No.22975587

>>22975535
pay close attention to the lips.

>> No.22975592

thats a pretty funny picture, what's it from?

>> No.22975599

>>22975535

The bard's the guy. The ranger is the girl. The bard is very confused.

>> No.22975614

>>22975599
And now it makes sense. Okay, that's a cool twist on the usual effeminate elf scenario.

>> No.22975636

>>22975490
I love that box. It comes from Hen Zemi, right?

>> No.22975651

I personally don't have any in-game romances, but in my Weird West game another player's character has supernatural luck and friendliness and charisma. He once boned a ghoul that was in the form of a middle-aged prostitute, and he seems to have gained the affections of one of my character's Frankensteinian bodyguards, a Haitian reanimated corpse woman with the voice and internal organs of a man.

He also took a special ability on a recent level up that nets him gifts and other advantages from an unknown friend. My GM interpreted this as giving him an anonymous sugar daddy.

>> No.22975652

>>22975533
>in games
He's a middle-aged wizard who inspires irrational feelings of mistrust, loathing and disgust in pretty much everyone he meets, despite not always having offended those people. He's pretty much forever alone.
>other players
I think I might be involved in a triangle drama with two of my friends who just broke up, but so far it's not clear what the hell is going on.

>> No.22975658

the girl i love lives 300 km away from me

h-hold me, /tg/

>> No.22975672

>>22975652
Triangle drama is best drama.


>>22975658
The girl I love is currently in a mental institution. You can wait, asshole.

>> No.22975710

>>22975658

T-the boy /I/ love lives 300km from /me/!

>> No.22975733

>>22975710

... Crindy?

>> No.22975745

>>22975733

GRYAN?

>> No.22975750

>>22975658
>>22975710
I might find a person I love somewhere 300km away from me.

>> No.22975757

The girl I've loved for 5 years doesn't love me back.

I don't even want to care about her like that. It's too damn painful.
But I can't stop. And it feels like it will never get better.

Fuck.

>> No.22975762

The man I love lives in the exact coordinates I do.
I share him with my gf.

>> No.22975766

>>22975745
MOM?!

>> No.22975776

In my current Mutants & Masterminds Marvel-teen game, I play a shy and timid boy, who can't control his superstrength and is constantly at risk of breaking things/people if his attention lapses. He has a crush on an NPC, who's covered in a shiny, chrome coating of grey goo, and is also constantly at risk of dissolving things/people if her attention lapses.

She is, however, rather stoic about it and generally takes no guff, and my character is not her type at all.

;___;

>> No.22975777

>>22975658
Mine is on a different continent, you have to deal with such things.

>> No.22975778

>>22975766
MOM?!

>> No.22975788

>>22975778
Donkey!

>> No.22975791

>>22975757
Not many options for that. Don't stop caring about her, just work on caring for other people too, and move from there.

>> No.22975794

>>22975778
ESMERALDA?!

>> No.22975802

>>22975778

Donkey!

>> No.22975805

>>22975794
STEVE?!

>> No.22975811

>>22975658
Mine lives nearby, but she disappears for days at a time. Sometimes I am convinced she was a cat in a past life.

>> No.22975821

>>22975811
...Is that really a bad thing?

>> No.22975823

>>22975794
I swear to God, Roberto, this >>22975778 >>22975788 isn't what it looks like!

>> No.22975895

>>22975658
Are you me...?

>> No.22975923

>>22975757
As hard as this may be to hear, you need to completely cut yourself off from her, or you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

>> No.22975932

Honorabu, compromised knight being stalked by a ultra-powerful, army destroying daemonic doppelganger that could wipe out the party in a single turn that wants his dick.

I will not ellaborate.

>> No.22975940

>>22975762
This is complicated.

>> No.22975948

Take this to /r9k/, guys.

>> No.22975983

>>22975923
No, I know I need to.
Kind of hard right now, should happen in at least 2 years.

Fuck, it's gotten to point where I've started to avoid her, just so that I don't have to deal with it.

>> No.22975999

>>22975940
How is it complicated?

>> No.22976003

>>22975802
DOCTOR SCOTT!

>> No.22976018

>>22976003
JANET!

>> No.22976026

>>22976018
BRAD!

>> No.22976027

>>22975983
I'm quite literally living the same thing, she has a boyfriend though, that's what put the point home for me. She's happy and loved, she doesn't need me in her life and I don't need her in mine.

>> No.22976046

>>22976026
ROCKY!

>> No.22976052

>>22976018
There is no Janet! Only Zuul!

>> No.22976057

>>22976046
...

>> No.22976068

>>22976046

>> No.22976071

>>22976057
Janet!

>> No.22976078

>>22976018
SLUT!

>> No.22976082

>>22976071
DOCTOR SCOTT!

>> No.22976102

>>22976071
SLUT!

>> No.22976105

>>22976082
See >>22976018

>> No.22976107

>>22975533
>In Games
Dwarf Bard: Did the typical bard "sex them up" solution to negotiation with some fey, rolled a 30 on his "Perform (Cunnilingus)" check. Now is known extraplanarly for his sex skills and word has spread. Mostly to men who now seek his advice.

My DM has informed me that he will allow me to take a feat similar to Leadership or what have you, called "Monstergirl Girlfriend". I'll effectively have a succubus (or some shit) following me around hitting on me. I'm afraid to do this, because he's a sadist.

Dwarf Rogue: Only one person on the ship is aware that she's actually female, and she's pretty resolute that he's a close friend and not a romantic partner. But that might change if things continue and she doesn't decide to trust anyone else with the truth. It's hard to say.

>with other players
Met a guy through D&D, became friends with him outside of it, developed some feelings towards him and we ended up going out.

Later turned out that he was only interested in getting fucked and was using me for sex. We don't talk much anymore.

>in general
>pic

>> No.22976123

>>22975999
Polyamory is always complicated.

>> No.22976134

>>22976027
She has one too.

I think the worst part about this whole thing is that, no matter how much I hate the term, I fit almost perfectly into the "Nice Guy" stereotype.

Even worse than that?

I was legitimately a nice person before all this.
Now I hate myself and her.
Not because she doesn't love me, but because she represents the fact that I will never be good enough. I'm not even good enough to get over her.

>> No.22976157

>>22976134
Bad road you're going down. Be wary.

>> No.22976165

>>22976003
>>22976018
>>22976026
>>22976046
>>22976057
>>22976068
>>22976071
>>22976078
>>22976082
>>22976102
>>22976105
10/10

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saupN9pUM

>> No.22976174

I've dated a girl for two years who I thought was my one and only, my soulmate, my all and everything, my sun, my stars, my moon, my life. She ditched me a little over a year ago. She lived on the other side of the continent and only met her twice in all that time. The breakup pretty much traumatised me and to this day the thought of her being happy disgusts me.

Right now, I'm in a rather uncomfortable situation where I have a crush on my best friend who had a crush on me when I was in my previous relationship but who is now in a relationship with another guy who she tells me about all the time which makes me uncomfortable while she knows my feelings.

I hate this bullcrap. Why can't it be simple.

>> No.22976181

>>22976123
Clearly the man I love is me. My gf is pretty cool, but I don't love her. All my love is for me.

>> No.22976190

>>22975658
My girl lives about 3000km away.

I'm jealous of you.

>> No.22976203

>>22976181
o hai

>> No.22976240

>>22976157
I think once she moves away (or I move away or whatever) it'll get better.

I hate to be bitter, but the guy she is dating is seriously an idiot.
Somehow she only manages to date prettyboys with no brains whatsoever.

I better stop; it's a lot easier if I don't think about it.

>> No.22976248

>>22976174
>I've dated a girl for two years who I thought was my one and only, my soulmate, my all and everything, my sun, my stars, my moon, my life.

hahgay.com

>> No.22976266

Love is dead to me.

>> No.22976296

>tfw gf openform roleplays
Disgusting.
>tfw can't find group to show her tabletop rping
Going to take her to Gencon this year.

>> No.22976315

>>22976174
I used to think my romantic situation was pathetic, but that...

>> No.22976318

>>22976248

I was young and foolish. I'm slightly less young and foolish now.

>> No.22976374

The only thing i look for in romance is serious love

>> No.22976400

>>22975895
we are both anons, yes we are the same person

we might have spoken before
we might speak in future again
we are closer than you think

>> No.22976523

I just get lost in his eyes.

>> No.22976540

>>22975672
small world, happened to me to, what flavour of crazy is she?

>> No.22976560

>>22976540
Nothing super serious, mostly depression, body issues, etc.

This being the second one, I'm thinking I'm attracting an odd sort of person though.

>> No.22976573

>>22976540
Were they crazy before or after you guys dated them ?

>> No.22976594

>>22976573
Yeah. Childhood issues with dad, especially after he killed himself.

>> No.22976607

>>22976540
are you that guy with romanian crazy girl?

>> No.22976629

>>22976607
The one that was really violent?

>> No.22976662

my butt hurts.
the cucumber is natures perfect dildo.

>> No.22976675

>>22976629
the one that stared down on you sleep
the one that made a campfire inside your house
the one that threatened you with a knife several times
the one that accused you of rape and STD after break up

you were in that "random encounters in real life" thread

>> No.22976708

>>22976675
Oh, no. I thought you meant the incredibly violent girl.

>> No.22976717

>>22976708
oh damn, would love to hear from that guy

>> No.22976733

>>22976675
yeah, when i made werewolf the apocalypse, I never really gave any consideration towards their personal lives.

I guess I always pictured it somewhere between mtv's "real world" and "Homers Odyssey"

>> No.22976758

>>22976733
wat?

>> No.22976765

like that deleted episode that lead to a hostage situation. 2 dead, 3 injured, highest ratings EVER

>> No.22976777

Another question anons.

What are you going to buy for your waifu at february 14 ?

>> No.22976783

>>22976758
i dunno. What are YOU talking about?

>> No.22976791

>>22976777
>>>/a/

>> No.22976795

>>22976777
cucumber.

>> No.22976809

>>22976777
A brand new bottle of silicon-based lube.

>> No.22976810

>>22976777
Gb2/a/. Didn't Molester Man teach you anything?

>> No.22976817

>>22976783
read my posts?

>> No.22976844

>>22976795
it even has the little bumps. you know how hard those are to find in ye old porno shoppe? I spent an hour looking online and i couldn't find one that big with the right kind of bumps.

Then i do a facepalm, head to the grocery store, and load up on disposables for less than 9.99.

You can use them more than once, but I wouldn't recommend it.

>> No.22976853

>>22976810
There is but only one man I'm willing to learn from.

>> No.22976868

>>22976853
OMK teaches you the same thing as MM.

>> No.22976873

>>22976844
it even comes with a starter set. You can buy an entire bag of carrots for less than five bucks.
Nature provides.

>> No.22976955

>>22976777
Pandora thinks I should buy my gf lingerie. I'm instead going to ask a friend to a "date" before I leave the country for study abroad.

>> No.22977108

the only problem is you can't mount them on a harness.

>> No.22977347

>tfw no one took me seriously.

>> No.22977358

>>22977347
Who are you quoting

>> No.22977437

>>22975490
>That bondage rope on the box.

>> No.22977633

The pain in my anus has abated. I'm still sore, but I think I'll be alright. Damn cucumbers hurt.

>> No.22977698

>>22977358
this.>>22976777

>> No.22977737

This is an epic thread

IN REAL LIFE
Mostly just short term relationships that only last a few months, mostly physical.

Currently dating awesome girl who likes RPGs

Currently long distance thing with girl I used to date now lives in other state

IN CHARACTER
Had my character who is a stand in for Ash from evil dead date Franken Fran stand in the DM made

It all started with him being stitched back together...then it got weird

>> No.22977846

>>22975490
A fanatical Moritat assassin and an irreverent Arbitrator who loves sex, booze, and lhos.

They're both women.

>> No.22977851

>>22977737
>epic thread
no

>> No.22978023

>>22976174
>but who is now in a relationship with another guy who she tells me about all the time which makes me uncomfortable while she knows my feelings.

Okay, while you don't have any room to make a move now since you missed the chance there and all...that's still a dick move on her part. Seriously? I'm shit at social interaction and I know when to not needle at feelings with people.

>> No.22978252

>>22978023
Let me shed some light on this from the perspective of someone whose situation is more akin to anon's love interest's than to anon's:

Regardless of how often she talks about the person she is in a relationship with to anon, anon will feel it is too often. If she mentions the guy once a month, that will be the conversation anon fixates on for the next month.

"Well, that's easy then. She just shouldn't mention him at all while speaking to anon", you might say.

But then at that point, it's anon fucking with her emotions by effectively forcing her not to talk about something (presumably) important to her. If you love someone and are told you can't talk about that person, that will frustrate you. And eventually might lead to you just not talking to the person who has implicitly forbade you from speaking on this subject, because the person you love is probably pretty important to you. Not being allowed to talk about them is effectively denying part of yourself.

It's like anon said. These things aren't simple.

>> No.22978334

>>22976777
I'm gonna give my cartoon wife a box of cartoon smokes. Cherry flavor.

>> No.22978398

>>22977851
Mostly due to the "Rocky" back and forth

>> No.22978406

My very first serious relationship was basically of /ss/ flavor. And odd as it might seem it was the best one I've had so far.
>inb4: someone implying that it's because there weren't any others

>> No.22978442

obligatory

>> No.22978496

>>22978252
Dude take my advice on this.
Never..ever talk with someone you are interested romanticly about her boyfriends and stuff.

I have seen this happen to another guy and she totally acts to him like a friend and nothing else, and it wont change.

If you say , i am ncomfortable with talking about this matter and provide evasive answers she will see that you are interested seriously about her.

>> No.22978507

My girlfriend and soon to wife will finally be moving to live with me in the states this year, only a few short months, /tg/ is a very big reason that we met and eventually fell in love.

Without this board I wouldn't have the love of my life in my life.

>> No.22978512

>>22978442
Dude, I cried.
Fuck, why can't I do romances like that?

>> No.22978529

>>22978507
Go fuck yourself, your happiness hurts me.

Nah, just messing with you, good for you man. I hope the story is as mushy and heartfelt as Japanon's was a few days ago... Dojobabes all around

>> No.22978560

>>22978529
Japanon was awesome.

I wish I had a Dojobabe so much.

>> No.22978643

I gave one of my players who had a female character a love interest at the start of the campaign. She got pretty attached to him, they were in love, all that shit.

Of course, I did this just so I could kill him off when the bad guy presented himself to the party.

>> No.22978704

>VtM
>playing with 2 new people
>attractive looking couple met on the lightrail
>evident they are going out
>I make male vampire
>chick made male vampire
>points out that he is bi
>has Attractive perk
>mid-game, asked if my character was attracted to hers
>I decided to make my character gay

Never developed to anything in-game cuz the game fell apart (too hard to get people together) and she may have been just doing it for future roll/manipulation stuff but it was definitely interesting

>> No.22978730

>>22978560
We all do... that man created a waifu for us. Normally I would hate him for having a waifu I could not, but I don't know. All I can do is salute the man and wish him luck.

God speed Japanon, god speed.

>> No.22978735

>relationship with gf is pretty much just sex and hanging out
>begin to feel hollow inside
>begin to check out other women
>realize that I'm just going to have an affair eventually
>tear-filled breakup

not too bad for my first foray.

>> No.22978762

>>22978735
>tear-filled
Gay.

>> No.22978766

>>22978529
Thanks man.

It's been great so far and it's only going to get better.

It was tg and streaming channels that we both found on tg.

>> No.22978804 [SPOILER] 

>>22978643
>playing female PC
>GM pushing me into romance
>at first I was like ewww
>but then I was like

>> No.22978861

>>22978512
becouse you arent superior gender.

>> No.22978865

>Join ongoing campaign in new group for my first 3.5 game
>Make Velma but a wizard
>Halfway into first game be told "Oh by the way, your character is dating the mayor of the town you met the group in"
>The mayor is literally the Sniper from TF2
>Eventually find out every other character has some form of waifu girlfriend
>One of them has a succubus and erinyes (who are twin sisters) fighting for his affections
>Two games later GM has forgotten about the Sniper and has a lesbian witch continuously hit on my character

>> No.22978897

>>22978730
Dear elegant gentleman, might i enquire about this japanon fellow you are talking about ?

Any screen captures or internet links you can provide will satisfy my curiosity greatly.

Thanks for your time spent reading my comment and hopefully you will provide me with much required information regarding this matter.

>> No.22978924

>>22978865

Anon...why havent you got up and leave the moment you were forced into a releationship by DM ?
Clearly that was bad sign of things coming.

>> No.22978936

>>22978924
I was young and stupid and hadn't gamed in a year, but yeah I should have got out of there.

>> No.22978949

>>22978735
You are worst neckbeard, you are neckbeard idiot you are neckbeard smell. Return to sex land.
You arent wanted here.

>> No.22978971

>>22978949

Nah, I can't live a lie.

>> No.22978982

>>22978897
Japanon, some dude from this IRL adventure thread who apparently leads an international life of wonder and amazement. He won himself a dojobabe, got involved in the mafia, and a fight club. His stories are fun.

I'll find the thread for you.

>> No.22978990

Oh yeah! valentines day happens this month! Thanks /tg/ you saved my marriage!

>Objective Zebra playset for Fiasco (ww2 submarine+eldrich horror)
>Power dead, most of the crew skewered on ill-planned decorative spikes, tentacle god-baby loose in the sub
>love at first sight
>The captain of the sub marries them
>horrible eldritch beast-in law brings sub to the surface.
>The tentace-groom is kebabbed by a nazi
>momma goes on a rampage killing everyone

>> No.22979087

Oh sure.
You can pretend like you never saw it.
You pretend like you never heard the word cucumber.
But there it is.
Staring you in the face.

The stinky cucumber in the room...

>> No.22979147

>>22979087
I bequeeth upon you this ancient bit of feminine lore, to you, my male brethren, and what do you do? You throw it back in my face.

Have you ever wondered, where have all the cucumbers gone? I really wanted to make a salad, but now all the cucumbers are missing.

Ever found a perfectly good cucumber sitting in the garbage?

Well, now you know.

Don't shoot the messenger.

>> No.22979160

>>22978982
Found it!

http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/954231/#22957940

Just read from here, there are more stories, but this is the dojobabe one we are referring to.

>> No.22979162

>>22978982
It looks like a glorious life-story.
Certainly a stuff of great IRl adventure.
Thank you in advance.

>> No.22979175

>>22979160
Thank you kind sir.

>> No.22979219

>>22978496
I'm sorry, you misunderstood me.

I am in a relationship.

There is another girl who I know has feelings towards me.

I am not going to refuse to speak about my girlfriend to this girl just because she has feelings towards me. I am in love with this woman and intend to stay with her. My love for her is a part of me. I refuse to disassociate myself from that, and I do not approve of those who would suggest someone in a similar situation to my own should.

>> No.22979322

I have meet someone that lives in another country over the net, at first we were just friends playing and admining the same game server but once I have broken up with my current girlfriend we started a strange but happy relationship on my dears birthday. My love is easily depressed, went trough hard times and he tells me I am the only reason he's still alive.

At moment my love's internet is having problems and I fear for his happiness, I hope my Tomichu is fine. I feel a pain on my chest if I stay without contact with T for too long and my school day starts soon, hopefully Toto will be back soon.

>> No.22979323

>>22979219

You..are That guy.
Stop giving her false hopes than !

>> No.22979333

Its literally as if nature intended it to be used as a dildo. I mean, what else is it used for? Sure, you can eat it, but its mostly water. Why would nature create something like this unless it was MEANT to be used as a dildo?

Now, i may be perverting nature by using it on my ass, but nature blessed me with a penis, not a vagina. I'm sure cucumbers were not meant to be used on the ass the same way as the vagina, but somewhere, out there, there has to be a smaller, less bumpy vegetable, possibly with a nub to stimulate the prostate.

I can't be alone on this. I won't. This is the biggest secret to hit mankind in a thousand years. If we control the worlds cucumber supply, women won't be able to masturbate effectively, and it could shift the balance of power. I'm telling you /tg. I'm on to something HUGE.

>> No.22979387

>>22979333
Dude, there are plants with the shape of penis or vaginas and threes with shape of naked people on the world. Nature is scary and horny. She's crazy.

>> No.22979409

>>22975658
Mine is currently nearly 20,000km away, she gets back next week though.

>> No.22979446

>In game
Played a male half-elf rogue who developed feelings for for the human female bard who was the younger sister of the male bard who died earlier in the campaign (the male bard also saved the rogue from slavery in the past). She gains feelings for him as well, but goes through a mental breakdown after the party goes through some horrifying shit. She is subsequently kidnapped by werewolves and is turned, furthering her insanity.

Rogue murders his way through them and takes down the alpha, getting infected along the way. Rolls nat 20 to resist losing his mind when he turns. (Yes, I know you think I'm bullshitting, but it really happened. The whole party went apeshit).

Saves bard girl, who becomes yandere for the rogue. She's obsessively clingy while he's desperate to keep her shattered mind together.

>with other players
Current gf is a hardcore 2nd ed player, but we haven't gotten into a game together.

>in general
above

>> No.22979451

I'd tell you but then I'd have to jump off a bridge.

>> No.22979493

>>22979451
No one to love? Someone far too crazy to tell us about? Tell us in riddles anon, we can help you.

>> No.22979540

>>22979446
Enjoying your forever thac0 anon ?

>> No.22979564

>>22979493

Far too many people to love and all far too heterosexual.

>> No.22979642

>>22979564

By people you mean women or men ?

>> No.22979655

>>22979642

The ones with cocks.

>> No.22979756

>>22979655

Get out /d/

>> No.22979774

>>22979564
We really shoulden't restrict ourselfs to love only the opposite gender, this is why I hate humanity some times, hunting and making the different feel shame they are different. Wish you a happy live.

>> No.22979811

Made a succubus.
Married a paladin (hiding alignment feats)
Succubus dies at wedding
Paladins kills self out of shame for marrying a demon.
The end.

>> No.22979860

Well, if ordinary people could change their shapes, I don't think it would be such a big deal.

>> No.22979871

>>22979811
Paladin was an idiot if they really loved each other.

>> No.22979908

Obviously you need to lie and commit violence towards other men. Don't you know anything about mating?

>> No.22979918

>>22979811
You are not aware of the FACTS my friend.
If a man ever truly loves a succubus, she turns to sand.
FACT

>> No.22979950

>>22979918
Of course, this may have just been fanciful legend, because how could anyone truly love a demon?

Unless, say, they were an ultimate expression of gods unfathomable will?

>> No.22979956

>>22975535
Noi no, you read that wrong(Not OP btw). The elven bard doesn't realize that hte scarred ranger is really a girl

>> No.22979958

>>22979774

Not that anon, i am a heterosexual but i wish to be the little girl and enjoy womenly love. But i also fear that i may just slightly enjoy and hate and get sick more by the act of sex between a man and my little girl self.

But i think i will never ever have romantic thoughts even if i were a girl. Although sometimes i fear very much if that proves untrue and hate the idea of it.

Oh and also i have absolutely no thought nor any inclanation towards male to male sex, or thinkng any kind of pleasure can achived from that.

Where does that put me into /tg/ ?
Am i seriously mentally sick?

>> No.22980026

>>22979958
gaze not upon the buffness, the hairy man, the machismo, stare only at their cocks, for such is the will of hermaphrodite' the greek goddess of non-cis privilege.

yea, do not question my sexuality, for in so doing i will bring to light yours, and nobody, not even the faithful, wants that.

>> No.22980084

>>22979958
your not sick. its just mild braindamage, incurable, but treatable with the proper therapy. Protip: if you're going to pay 150 bucks to get reamed, do it properly.

>> No.22980133

I once had a crush on a bro friend, but he had a girlfriend, who i had of febuary of last week. Its not confidential, I have potential, now let me in before I'm forced to beg.

>> No.22980139

>>22979958
Correction - i will never have romantic thoughts with men if i were a girl.

I want womenly love.

>> No.22980144

the first rule of not-gay club is that you do not talk about not-gay club.

>> No.22980170

>>22980133
there once was a man from nantucket...
can we make that into a whiny emo song too?

>> No.22980173

>>22980144
Gay

>> No.22980196

>>22980139
oh god, i'm revolting. wallowing in my own filth, like some sort of diseased animal...

I feel like Howard Stern.

>> No.22980229

>>22980139
me too bro. I just don't know what to do. I'm like grandpappy nurgle, all alone in his armchair, trying to discern which of his many orifices he stuffed his snacks into.

>> No.22980249

>>22980229
the anus is not a beer cozy

>> No.22980281

>>22975757
>cut all ties with her
>don't text her
>don't message her on AIM or Facebook
>drink a LOT of alcohol

No seriously, drink a fucking lot. Try and down a handle of Vodka a week.

Right not your facing the brunt of it, this is the absolute toughest part of having your heart broken. Just detach yourself. I know you think it's impossible right now, but it isn't. You can't remain friends with her unfortunately. You took the ballsy risk of revealing your feelings and that simple act changed the dynamic of the relationship forever. Unless you want to mope around with her for the rest of your life as her "friend" then I suggest cutting all ties with her. She's friends with all your friends? Make new ones.

Alcohol helps a lot to forget heart breaks. It's medicine designed for emotions.

Stick in their Champ. I know you can do this

>> No.22980288

I could be with a dude, if he were like all femme and you couldn't tell him apart from a girl. And hell, in the dark, you can hardly tell your cousin from you're sister.

>> No.22980312

>>22980196
>>22980229

Dafuk? , i am pretty healthy good looking and go to gym frequently.
Just becouse i love female body so much that i want to become one and despising and fearing that male sex may even slightly pleasure my girl self does not mean i am an obese shit.

>> No.22980340

>>22979323
What, you think I tried to make her fall in love with me?

The fuck are you smoking?

>> No.22980341

If your penis gives you trouble
cut it off
cut it off
while i sing this song

>> No.22980367

> My first ever relationship
> She's super cute and hot
> Just left a long unhappy relationship with a friend
> I'm a sadist; she's a masochist
> Never thought that would happen
> She's into chocking, slapping etc.
> I'd like to try but nervous cause its my first time
> What do /tg/? We're planning on meeting in a week for sexy fun torture time.

>> No.22980397

How do i get my icy cockhammer of righteousness back from that troll-frost-ogre fembeast that keeps stomping on my heartballs?

>> No.22980414

>>22980367
bring body bag.
no witnesses.

>> No.22980417

>>22975490

My character got forced to marry at gunpoint. I had some trinket thing that acted as the ring, and it transmitted the woman's emotions over to my priest.

He had failed a will save before and lost his V-card, which kind of frustrated me, but when your guy has a double-barrelled shotgun and is being mind-fucked by a happy angel, it's kinda... what the fuck are you supposed to do?

Also, my first character ever got drugged with a love potion. Mhm. "Consent" isn't a thing with my IRL group, apparently.

>> No.22980428

>>22980367
go slow.
keep up the pace but don't overdo it.

>> No.22980435

>>22980281
I refuse to drink, but soon I will be cutting all ties with her.

I can hardly stand her as a person, too. She's a hipstercunt.

Fuck, why do I even like her?

>> No.22980439

>>22980417
>has a double-barrelled shotgun AIMED AT HIS BACK

Forgot that part, kinda important.

>> No.22980441

>>22980340
The fact that you know that she has feelings and do nothing to help her not get hurt shows you are a THAT GUY.

You are one of the most useless and shit tripfags in this board and now a that guy. This low ...

>> No.22980452

>>22980367
Make sure she knows you're nervous. Just smile and tell her you want her to be happy. Then slap her.

>> No.22980459

>>22980367
Read shinez...lots of shinez.

>> No.22980461

>>22980435
>refuse to drink

Don't. I'm serious.

You need that alcohol. It's liquid confidence. It will help you get through the next few weeks.

>> No.22980464

>>22980435

>I refuse to drink

Not even a liiiittle?

>Fuck, why do I even like her?

That's why you like her. Because cupid is a fucking asshole.

>> No.22980500

>>22980461
I can't drink like i used to.
Honest, its not the taste, it is the aftereffect.

>> No.22980510

>>22980459
Shinez? I searched it up, but all that's coming up is tire rims.

>> No.22980519

>>22980441
>This low ...
I didn't think anybody could go lower from drunkenly admitting he blows Cody.

>> No.22980523

>>22980452
That's how I deal with every woman.

>> No.22980526

>>22980367
Don't get ahead of yourself, but have fun.

Fellow sadomasochist; You will learn the difference between good crying and bad crying, the happy ouch and the sad ouch, the good cringe and the bad cringe, and the difference between "no" and "no." This comes from experience, and reading body language, not something easily described in text. The internet will, to the greater extent, fail you in this domain.

>> No.22980546

>>22980510
Sorry wrong typing.

You will love this.
http://shiniez.deviantart.com/

>> No.22980550

>>22980526
>the difference between "no" and "no."
Isn't this what safewords are for? Different anon.

>> No.22980551

>>22979333
Fuck you, I love eating cucumbers.

>> No.22980572

>>22980441
Who said I do nothing to help her not get hurt?

I said that I'm not going to abstain from talking about my relationship just because of her feelings for me. That's unfair to her because I'm misleading her and it's unfair to me to insist that I can't talk about the person I love, regardless of the reason.

You can call me useless and shit all you want, but fuck you for calling me a "that guy" just because you're a faggot beta who can't process that the chick you're pining over loves someone else. Go fist yourself until you bleed to death.

>> No.22980573

>>22980367
Safewords:
They exist for a reason, kiddos!

Also, find out just how into torture she is.
Maybe it's just me, but I've had girls say "Yeah, I like being submissive, punished, slapped, whatever" and then had things be really awkward because we didn't communicate our desires properly.

Maybe it's because I suck at talking.

>> No.22980578

>>22980526

Not that anon but
How to find and understand if someone will be a god female dom, you seem to be a sage guy about this stuff.

>> No.22980589

>>22980550
Also not that anon but i think if you reach that point you pretty much fucked up the mood already.

>> No.22980600

>>22980572
Hey, I'm sad pining guy, not the guy you were talking to.

Although, if I could fist myself to death I would.

>> No.22980607

>>22980573
Like, from her last guy she got brined with a cigarette on an area several times in quick succession (still leaving a mark months later) and really, really liked it.

Her previous Dom is this insanely big guy, I'm tall but skinny.

>> No.22980612

>>22980572
Lol no, that was my idiot friend being beta pointless trip-fag

Seriously what the hell with the trip? what have you contributed to this board to walk around tripping? What is your excuse to seperate yourself from the anon ?

>> No.22980620

Its easy, anon. just picture all the violent, inflammitory hate speech coming from a feminine, female voice. A head on a body.

stop picturing lord ubermensch, hate troll neo nazi, and picture some sour faced fish crotched cutie from down the way saying all those nasty things to you.

>> No.22980623

>>22980607
Oh.

Jesus Christ, lucky you.

Godspeed, SadistAnon.

>> No.22980631

>>22980589
Have different safewords, so you can say "slow down", "take a break" without all-out stopping and without needing to use "no"

>> No.22980636

meta sadism is not sadism. its a cop out.

>> No.22980668

>>22980612
>What is your excuse to separate yourself from the anon?

Attention whoring, duh

>> No.22980676

>>22980578
Need some advice here anons.

>> No.22980710

>>22980668
I respect those trips that contribute something to this board with content, downloads new stuff art, drawings , quests , tutorials etc.

But i hate faggots like this that just come up and contribute nothing and only trip becouse they are so special and different and want special treatment.

>> No.22980721

>>22980676
I dont want my manhoood burned or crushed by an amateur or a crazy.

>> No.22980722

See, we all tend to think that every guy on 4chan is actually a "guy". But we don't know that. We can never be sure. its the perfect disguise. Pretend to be a dude, call guys names, humiliate them, get your perverted kicks and go back to being mary jane, perverted good girl who likes bobby socks and trolling men and herself into believing she is a guy.

is it really so hard to believe? I'm sure you have, or know somebody who has, pretended to be a girl online before. So just picture some ballbusting lesbian psychobitch who swears like a sailor but looks like a cute little nerd who wears kicks instead of high heels and male briefs under her jeans. Not in a nasty way, not a , egads, look at what escaped from the zoo kinda way, in a how could a girl with that nice a face and that cute a body be saying all these god awful things?

>> No.22980726

I'm in love with this girl from my college, /tg/.
She's into Lord of the Rings and all that kind of stuff.
I believe she sees me as nothing but a friend, though.

>> No.22980739

>>22980721

You might not want to get your advice off 4chan then.

>> No.22980754

>>22980578
>>22980676
>>22980721
How much they charge.

I'm serious, you don't find female doms. If you don't find the one in a million woman who doesn't expect you to be the man in the relationship, you're going to keep to fork over money to a professional if you're so attached to your heterosexuality you refuse to go bi.

>> No.22980759

>>22980721
she said if i told anyone, she'd come back for the rest.

>> No.22980848

>>22980612
>>22980668
I used to just namefag, then some people started using my name to be faggots, so I started using a trip.

I write sometimes. I like to have my name associated with my writing, even if it's not directly. If that makes me an attention whore in your eyes, good for you.

I just never bother taking it off because I'm lazy.

>> No.22980849

>>22980754
if you don't think there are chicks out there who don't dig getting their kicks off of hurting other human beings, you are more naive than anyone else on this or any other board.

And for every 10 that feel guilty about it, there is one that wants to channel that energy in a positive constructive manner.

That or she is so batshit crazy she is afraid of hurting someone or forcing someone to do something that they don't want to do.

Men think about rape all the time. You don't think women think about rape too? What it be like raping other guys, because they are so frustrated and horny and they won't give it to them. "why aren't my tits big enough? Isn't my ass wide enough? why won't anybody FUCK me? I see him looking at me, I KNOW he wants me, why won't he make a move? Dickhead! I'd like to punt that shithead right in the fucking crotch! (why won't he go out with me? :.("

>> No.22980890

>>22980754
That is ..depressing.
It is not a matter of just sex to me. I dont know pretty weird but i hate the idea of sex or stuff like that for money.

It should either be made with passion or for fun.

The moment i even a little bit hinted that i may like this kind of stuff girl i was going out with got freaked a bit and after a while stopeed seeing me.
Damn....

What about local forums or such for this..hobby, arent there people looking for this kind of stuff for fun or most of them looking to get peoples money?

>> No.22980913

>>22980849
advice here ?>>22980890

>> No.22980971

>>22980726
Ask her out. The worst thing that could happen is you get rejected.

Just don't ask her out like "I LIKE YOUR FACE I WANT TO FUCK YOU" and the friendship shouldn't crumble.

>> No.22981005

>>22980849

When am I not thinking about rape?

>> No.22981043

>>22980971
Dude dont do this, if you are already at the friendzone area you are fucked already.
If you ask her out she will probably decline and you will sink worse into the friendy lane.

You may want to go out with anotehr girl for a few months just for the sake of it and show that you are alpha and dont need one bitch. After that break up with that other girl and after sometime ask her.
if you go out and ask, you are screwed big time.

>> No.22981082

>>22980849
>And for every 10 that feel guilty about it, there is one
You're just making up numbers now, right?

>Men think about rape all the time. You don't think women think about rape too?
Rape is a bigger female fantasy than it is a male one.

But they think about getting raped.

>> No.22981117

>>22981043
>being a beta faggot
No, look. I'm using ad hominem because you're advising never making a move, ever. Women appreciate confidence in a mate- they don't want a child to take care of, they want a partner.

This shit isn't that complex. Get over yourself. And furthermore, if you don't like yourself, why would any woman like you?

>> No.22981251

>>22981117
Dude did you even raed the entire text?

To sum it for you
>Dont go for it now becouse you are in friendzone and will be rejected
>Go out of the friendzone by going out with another girl for a few months to show the eowny you arent begging for her love
>after that dump the few month girl and wait for sometime, than ask her out

See it now ?

It is a pretty alpha move to get out of this tricky situation he is in now. But it is the only way.

>> No.22981526

>>22980848
I'm sorry, I only ever used your name because Cody was hilt-deep in your mouth :3

On the upside, I have a tripfag on my filter list though.

>> No.22981624

>>22981526

Who are the others ?

>> No.22981676

>>22979160

Wow, did the girl and the her father discover his connections with the yakusa?

>> No.22981802

I'm trying to convince myself that I don't give a fuck and don't need anyone.

It's not working. It never works. But what is a socially awkward guy with literally no friends going to do?

Kill themselves like the betas they are.

>> No.22981826

>>22981043
>Dude dont do this, if you are already at the friendzone area you are fucked already.
If he's in the friendzone, he's got nothing to lose because he's in there already.
You do not get out of the friendzone by being nice to her and do everything she asks you to. You get out of the friendzone by taking some goddamn initiative.

>> No.22981850

He's a polite and naive runaway noble, from the nation of devils and has been on the run for ten years and is 24 now. He was wizard and recently discovered that he has a sorcereous bloodline(destined).

She was a Kitsune Trickster/Alchemist that left home from parent issues and has been stealing for years.

It started when the party monk/cleric tricked him into think the trickster liked him and gave him a very basic explanation in how to pick up women and that is how the ball started rolling.

Pic related; it's who the monk's player gets a little inspiration from. He also took Profession: Matchmaker.

He literally knows nothing of relationships with women and how they work

He has 19 Charisma.

>> No.22981874

>>22981826
>If he's in the friendzone, he's got nothing to lose because he's in there already.
He could lose her friendship entirely.
But what are female friends good for, if you can't stick your dick in them, right?

>> No.22981902

>>22981874

Uh.

Um.

>> No.22981914

>>22981874

>But what are female friends good for, if you can't stick your dick in them, right?

I agree with this unironically.

>> No.22981944

>>22981874

...What ARE they good for other than that, anon?

>> No.22981962

>>22981802

Go join an am-dram company.

>> No.22981987

>>22981944
Being friends with.

My best friend is a chick and I am fine with not porking her.

>> No.22982023

>>22981874
Right now, they're friends, and he wants to put his dick in her. Whether or not she wants him to put his dick in her is uncertain at this time. By asking her out, this fact can become clear. Either she says yes and all will be well, or she says no and at least anon will know for sure where he stands. He'll be able to move on with his life. Things between him and the girl might be awkward for a bit, but if they're really friends this should pass eventually.

>> No.22982051

>In Game 1
He's uninterested in anyone, though he might slightly have the hots for an NPC scientist lady.

>In Game 2
He's close to asexual- though he's slept with a few women to get things from them, mostly drugs, and he might be getting interested in another character- but said other character is in lesbians with a third character.

>In Game 3
She doesn't quite understand romance, being born in a lab.

>In real life
Nope. Not since my ex dumped me a few years back.

>> No.22982086

>>22982051

>Not since my ex dumped me a few years back.

Are you me, anon?

>> No.22982165

>>22981802
That is true anon, in the end it is just another human being that is not higher being than you.

You dont need thier fake social interaction.

>> No.22982171

>>22981962

Theatre? That's, like, the exact opposite of my personality man.

Or is that the point?

>> No.22982274

>>22980546
Holy shit this is actually just amazing.

>> No.22982345

>>22982165

>fake social interaction
>fake

wut

>> No.22982926

In Game:
>Married to a fae who literally stole his heart. She keeps it in a wooden box lined with velvet.
>Poisoned by her lover because she was a better swordsman than he was.
>Fell in love with her primary enemy in disguise, a Bogart who wants revenge on the world for scorning him.

IRL:
>First left me for another guy, then tried to tell me about how she banged three more guys at the same time.
>Second had a crush on me, but was a sadist and slightly crazy.
>Decided I'm not in a good enough place socially or financially to start up a new relationship for the time being.

>> No.22983770

My CP2020 techie had a thing going with a hacker that helped the group out once in a while. Which was surprising considering that his face was basically mincemeat due to a horrible accident involving a lathe. He didn't get it fixed because he was wanted and the authorities only had his undamaged face and old name.

One of my HtV characters was married, but it didn't come up very much in game.

There's a lot of flirting going on in one of the games I'm in right now, but I'm not going to post details because I know my group is on /tg/

>> No.22984364

I had a fairly high level Dwarf Priest of Moradin (This being AD&D 2nd edition, I was nearing the limit for Dwarven Priests and was a high priest at a major temple in the citadel) who was constantly bugged by priestesses of the [mother diety] trying to make him get married soon. Once the goddess herself showed up and bothered him about it. It was pretty funny.

>> No.22986594

>>22980849
>"why aren't my tits big enough? Isn't my ass wide enough? why won't anybody FUCK me? I see him looking at me, I KNOW he wants me, why won't he make a move?
I'm dragging this terribly out of context, but ... just get one of these. It wll get the message across.

>> No.22986630

>>22981676
>Japanon
The guy didn't say. Hopefully someday he will return with more stories or to just answer questions.

Some day...

>> No.22986719

>>22982926
>tried to tell me about how she banged three guys at the same time
What you do there is laugh at her and ask her if she was seeking approval.

>> No.22987094

>>22976203
>Narcissus
Most of my attraction to girls is also envy, so I can see how this would apply.

>> No.22989056

>>22986594
Yeah, there's no way a girl can fail to get sex if she wants it.

>> No.22989072

>>22986594
If she wants it that badly, why not just... ask him?

I dunno, I can't see the issue here. If she's certain, she should make a move.

Unless she still firmly believes all men should make the move, in which case the problem presents itself.

>> No.22989114

>>22975750
>300 km
>Does mental half-assed math
>Figure 180-ish miles

Oh for fuck's sake. I drive (mental math, mental maaathhh!) 145 kilometers per day to go to / from work!

>In Europe, 100 miles is a long distance.
>In America, 100 years is a long time.
>In Soviet Union, we stand in line for bread.

>> No.22989116

>>22980849
>Men think about rape all the time
Stopped reading here. Rape culture hurr durr go back to /v/.
Women can initiate aswell, fuck.

>> No.22989126

>>22989114
You get paid to drive there, also, roads in EU aren't straight bits where you can just lock the steering wheel, put cruise control for cool and sleep during the journey.

>> No.22989129

There is no time for romance on the battlefield

>> No.22991006

>>22989126
They aren't that way in the US, either. Straight stretches generally only last for the requisite quarter-mile.

>> No.22991028

>>22991006
Depends where you are. The flat "All of this was intentionally and somewhat intelligently planned" parts in the middle are basically just perfectly straight, even grids.

>> No.22991142

>>22975490
None.
>tfw

>> No.22991143 [SPOILER] 

>>22989072
To give the situation some context. It's Elena's (eyepatch girl) first date after a long while. Her sister (in maid outfit) wanted to make sure everything goes smoothly, so she dressed her up for it. Here's what follows (better put under spoiler so it doesn't hurt some people's believes).
>>22989056
If it's just sex they are after, it should work most of the times. Most of the times.

>> No.22991190

>>22989056
A lot of girls post-25 or so, don't just want sex. They'd like something of substance tacked on with it.

>> No.22991208

>>22991028
While you are correct... that involves actually living out in the middle. That's the part of the country that's like fucking Mad Max. It's all religious psychopaths and farmers.

>> No.22991260

>>22991190
It might depend on your local social enviroment, but locally most girls want to get attached once and for all from 19 years on. And fail horribly because most guys don't care for anything like that before early 30's.
In (post) soviet Europe, relationships have you.

>> No.22991851

There are at least two girls interested in me, where I'm clearly interested in one of them.

I'm a coward and can't open up to her directly, so we're stuck beating around the bush. In few months she'll move out to study in other city. So BAD END in 4 or so months.

>> No.22991885

Never been romantically involved in games or in real life.

>> No.22991895

>>22991190
And by substance he means cold, hard cash.

>> No.22991907

My shepherd character has something of a fling going on with the Goddess of sheep. She's totally tsundere for him, and says he isn't a good shepherd (he isn't), but he tries to please her. Also she turns him into a lamb when she is displeased.

>> No.22991925

>>22991907
Are you from Wales?

>> No.22991934

>>22978252

Original anon here. Things are pretty complex, and I know I'm a bit of a scumbag for not wanting her to talk about her bf all that much, but I suck it up when she just talks about him being sweet and all, but draw the line when she talks about what they do sexually. She keeps forgetting I told her it makes me uncomfortable and, well, last night I broke down when she told me he taught her how to cyber.

I don't know what to do anymore.

>> No.22991964

>>22991925

No, we just did a commoner game, and in a small village on the borders, shepherd made sense to make.

At least, after everyone else picked the cool jobs, and it wasn't like I was going to choose the same as them.

>> No.22992037

>>22991895
This.

>> No.22992224

>>22979446
You know lycanthropism, at least in 3.5, can be cured, right?

>> No.22992259

He's a grizzled war-wizard turned wetwork agent. She's a deposed drow baroness with an illithid assassin cadre. Together, every have sex.

>> No.22992280

EVERYONE HATES ME AND THEY WANT ME TO SUFFER AND DIE SO I MUST HATE THEM ALL BACK AND WANT THEM TO SUFFER AND DIE BECAUSE I DON"T WANT TO SUFFER AND DIE AND ITS EITHER ME OR THEM ONE OF MUST SUFFER AND DIE AND ITS NOT GOING TO BE ME!!!!!!!!

and that's how I talk to women.

>> No.22992318

An anthro wolf Fighter dude and a little anthro Possum Cleric whom act like big brother and little sister but are slowly falling for one another as they adventure on. (inb4 "furries". they are anthros like you'd see in a cartoon setting)

>> No.22992366

Is a dragon. Didn't know she was a dragon. Ran screaming away forever.

>> No.22992390

>>22992318
>implying cartoon setting furries are not furries
>implying you're not a furry

>> No.22992631

In game, I've been on a recent kick with characters that are horrific looking but are working on it through magic/good deeds, so no relationships blossoming there.

IRL I haven't had much of anything going on for about two years. I just don't really go out and meet women, since I'm in a mostly male dominated major and not much of a party guy after my first blackout experience last Halloween. Online dating hasn't really worked out either, since I'm either finding hambeasts or retarded chicks. I don't really feel like I'm in a crushing pit of loneliness or anything, but I really do miss just cuddling next to some one and falling asleep together watching a movie.

>> No.22992662

I was with this girl for 2 years. Then I got seriously ill and had to move to the hospital for 3 months. She visited me everyday. I became really depressed when I left the hospital, hurting anyone around me, including her. I needed a pause from everything.
So I proposed a pause from the relationship. She agreed.
Then she went to a different town for 2 months because of work. Where she met a someone new.
She dumped me.
That was half a year ago. They broke up. She is coming back to me. She misses me and I miss her. What do, /tg/?

>> No.22992728

>In game.
Not really, no. There's plenty of barmaids being shagged in the basements and visits to the local whorehouse, but I've never taken part in anything resembling inter-party romance.

>Players.
Started a relationship with one of the players in a game i used to DM. She...might have been in a relationship with someone else at the time. It got pretty ugly. Anyway, I moved away, and she went back to her ex. jesus christ i miss her so much

Another amusing pseudo-example. I used to have this other game running with a couple I know. They're engaged. It was the three of us as players, plus a forth friend as the DM. Anyway, one time, while the couple in question are having sex, she accidentally screams out the wrong name. My name. What followed was a series how highly amusing phone calls, with various allegations flying everywhere. We're all still friends, though.

>Otherwise
I am now spend every night with my one true love, J&B Scotch. You won't leave me, will you? Nah. You're there for me. I can depend on you, J&B. You're always there for me.

>> No.22992782

I think one of the other players is interested in me, but I can't be sure. I'm usually wrong about... well everything, always. Plus I don't know if I like her either. Now that she's living in my room though, at least it's easier to get to the game as we only need one carpool now.

>> No.22992901

>>22992782
ask her out to some coffee. If she refuses, play it cool and be like "oh okay. damn shame. thought you were cute." and leave it like that. don't show any remorse or guilt. She will either get back to you or you will live happily together.

>> No.22992967

>>22992901

Well that might work, except that I'm pretty meh about here. She's super introverted and weird, not really someone I'd want to be in a relationship with.

That, and she won't give back the bed, so she's kind of selfish.

>> No.22993001

>>22992662
Take her back. She cares a lot about you. You care to much about her to truly succeed at other relationships.

>>22992782
Start flirting, son. Show your sexual/romantic interest with a certain level of ironic detachment.

>>22992967
>she won't give back the bed
lolwat

>> No.22993033

>>22992967
well then give her the dick.

>> No.22993067

>>22993001

After she started living in my room she took the bed. Now I have to sleep on a chair because she won't give it back. I'm like;

"Can you get out of the bed, I want to sleep there tonight. Also the cabinet is next to the bed so I can put my water there rather than on the floor (keep knocking it over)."

"I'll move over. It's a king sized bed, there's room. Also just put the water under the chair."

And then obviously I have to sleep on the chair. Or the floor, sometimes the chair hurts my back.

>> No.22993095

>>22993067
Son, I think she wants the dick.

>> No.22993096

>>22993001
Are you sure? I mean she dumped me for a reason. I don't think I can trust her enought to start another go with her.

>> No.22993119

>>22993033
>>22993095

Well I don't want to give it. I just want to be able to not keep knocking my water over in the night. Also my pillows, but I probably could just grab them from her, I'm definitely stronger than she is.

>> No.22993124

>>22993067
I think, my friend, that you are missing quite the hint there.

>> No.22993127

>>22993067
Just sleep with her in the same room. If she advances on you be like
"BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL! ARE YOU TRYING TO SEDUCE ME, FOUL WOMAN?!"
If she finds it funny, go for her. If she is disgusted, give her the dick and throw her out of the room the next day.

>> No.22993134

>>22993096

Don't. Jesus, do you even dignity? She's already been with another guy, the very thought of banging sloppy seconds is disgusting.

>> No.22993147

>>22993119
Stop focusing on the goddamn water, son. She wants your dick. Give it to her. After you finished cumming all over her, declare "THIS IS MY KINGDOM NOW! YOU HAVE TO PAY TAXES TO SLEEP HERE!"

>> No.22993163

>>22993134
Well she was over this last weekend and we fucked several times. I don't mind "sloppy seconds" because I was first anyway. It's more about trust and if the relationship could go well again or if it would be a total desaster and a waste of my time and ressources.

>> No.22993199

>IRL
I used to be a womanizing asshole. Then fell in love and lost her for good. It's a long and painful story, but needless to say I'd fight to get her back if such a thing was possible - it isn't.
I've since become more or less asexual. I truly don't have any fucks to give.

>In-games
As a direct parallel, I tend to make characters who don't lend themselves well to the idea of romance. Idiots, mutants, evil bullywugs, talking plants, asshole aliens, and so on.

>> No.22993203

>>22993134
>wanting virgins
>not wanting girls that know how to fuck
Nigga you gay. This shit about "oh no she fucked other dudes"? Yeah, she has a better sex life than you. Don't be a cunt.

>> No.22993214

>>22980281

>Handle a week
>Heavy drinking

For a board that loves dorfs so much you fa/tg/uys cannot handle your liquor.

>> No.22993231

>>22993163

A wiser man than I once said you can always double back on pussy, but never double back on a relationship.

I miss you Magic Fat Negro.

>> No.22993261

>>22993231
And why is that. I need convincing proof to let go. I truly miss her, but I'm afraid I might end up alone like all the /v/irgins or that I make a mistake by taking her back.

>> No.22993277

>>22993067
She is literally asking you to join her in bed, son. What more signal do you want, an embossed invitation?

>>22993096
Of course I'm not fucking sure, I'm an anonymous stranger on the internet. I'm also slightly drunk. However, she obviously cares about you. You also obviously care about her, otherwise you wouldn't be feeling so conflicted. Talk to her about your trust issues, about why she left. I imagine it is because she felt pushed away, and thus sought solace elsewhere.

Here's the thing. You fucked up by being a cunt to her and everyone else. She fucked up by leaving you. It's up to you to know if it's worth another shot.

>> No.22993279

>In Games
Im the DM, so...

>With players
I don't think so, it's a sausagefest here.

>In General
Well shit, you got me.
Recently been rejected by a friend, but it's cool, we just do like nothing happened, or something like that.
My latest relationship was... Well, it wasn't a bad one but it wasn't that good.
I live in this archipelago, and met this girl, who lived in the nearest island, you still have to get on a 30-60 minute ferry, but yeah, she came here very weekend or so since her mother was in a relationship with a man from here.
We ended up being boyfriend & girlfriend, good times, we met almost every weekend, when I had free time and all that...
Till one day, two days before we were supposed to meet, she tells me that her mother's partner is moving with them, and that she wouldn't make it this time.
By that time, since I am fucking poor, I was getting my internet cut, along with my mobile phone service, so I couldn't pay a ticket to go to her island and meet up, and less as often as she used to come here.
And that was the last person with which I shared love... it doesn't feel that bad anyway.

>> No.22993320

>>22993277
That... actually sounds like a good tip. I shall try once more then, reinstating the relationship with new rules and boundaries.
She is definetly worth the shot, because she is the only woman I met so far that can handle my weirdness/awesomeness.

>> No.22993328

>>22993261

Because you have lost the power in the relationship, and any new relationship will start on unfavorable terrain. When she comes back she knows she has you stuck in love, and that's not a good state of being.

The perfect form of a non-married relationship is where the man likes the woman, and the woman loves the man. Strongest possible bonds are there.

Go listen to the Black Phillip Show on Youtube and learn the ways of man.

>> No.22993356

>>22993328
>power
>ways of man
Wait wat. Are you from the 40s?

>> No.22993371

>>22993163
>It's more about trust and if the relationship could go well again or if it would be a total desaster and a waste of my time and ressources.
>a waste of my time and resources.
Well, then just don't invest what you can't get right back. Equal exchange ain't the best base for long term relationship but it works fine if you're not sure about getting serious about it.

>> No.22993411

>>22993356

>Believing relationships are a form of power struggle
>1940s

You do realize that power struggles in relationships are covered extensively in Foucault, probably the most recognizable figurehead of the postmodernist movement?

But stay beta if you believe power struggles don't exist in relationships.

>> No.22993420

>>22993371
what do you mean by equal exchange?

>> No.22993481

>>22993411
I don't believe they do not exist. It just looked like you were trying to give me a "alpha male" lecture, which I don't need. Like I need to be a pimp or something to feel loved. This is not about who has the upper hand. It's about whether the relationship I would get myself into again would have any chance of working properly in the long term. Or if there is something to be considered since we already had 2 years together

>> No.22993514

>>22993481

I'm not giving you an alpha male lecture. I'm telling you what will happen when you go back. She will fuck around on you, she will not respect you, and you will be miserable. The success rate for returns to a relationship are abysmal.

Go listen and learn. It will help you.

>> No.22993540

>>22993514
Since you're insisting I will do so.

>> No.22993707

>>22993514
I have listened for 10 minutes already and I'm not so sure this was exactly a good idea. But for your sake I will "watch" the first episode completly.

>> No.22993735

>>22993707

Just listen, learn, take in ideas. It may be against your ideology, but you need to see what makes it work.

>> No.22993960

>>22993735
I'm starting to laugh at this. In a positive way. But so far it's all pretty superficial. I hope it's getting deeper.

>> No.22993983

>>22993960

There's 13 episodes. I don't recall the entire series that well, but it will help you and gets you to understand more. Be open minded, and if you laugh and enjoy it keep listening... That's the beauty of it.

>> No.22994034

>>22993983
I'm the most open minded person I know. And I know people. Also for information I studied psychology for a couple of semesters. So I'm hoping to find something more realistic than just theorems. I'm just saying I know about this stuff, but I need a new perspective. That's why I'm asking random strangers about truth.

>> No.22994843

>>22993277
>>22993147

I don't want a signal, I'm not interested in her. I just want to be able to live comfortably in my own room again.

>>22993127

We do sleep in the same room, I just sleep on the chair at the desk. Plus, if she wanted to make a move, I think she would have done so by now. Or maybe not, she's weird. After nine days it's not any less weird.

>> No.22994873

>>22994034
>I'm the most open minded person I know. And I know people.

You sound arrogant for no good reason. A few psych courses and some light reading do not make you a master of the human mind.

>> No.22994947

>>22994873
Sorry. That was not intended. Just felt like I'm treated like I know nothing and that I'm a stubborn guy.

>> No.22994970

>>22994947

Well, when you attempt to act like a know it all when people give you knowledge you're not helping that cause.

>> No.22994979

>>22994843
Why is she staying in your room in the first place? Why don't you throw her out and let her rule you in your territory?

>> No.22995006

>>22994970
I didn't say I know it all. I was saying I have a bigger perspective on the matter than most people. I just wanted to progress the conversation faster to get faster results out of it.

>> No.22995012

>>22994843

So you have let a woman take your bed without any sort of recompense?

You need to go and lie in your own bed, and see what happens.

>> No.22995060

>>22994979

She followed me inside after getting dropped of after a game. Didn't say anything about it and I didn't really care. Again though that was nine days ago, I've asked her to get out but she just goes into the living room.

>>22995012

I've done that, she just moves over. Most of the time I usually just sit on my bed (much of the room is taken up by it), but obviously I'm not gonna sleep there, that'd be creepy.

>> No.22995077

>>22995060

No, you sleep in your bed if you wish to maintain any semblance of masculinity. If she wants to sleep elsewhere? That's on her.

>> No.22995097

>>22995060
Sleep in your bed, enjoy the extra warm bed, and don't sex her. This isn't hard.

Also, ask her what the fuck is wrong with her normal sleeping place that's preventing her from staying there. Something's seriously up.

>> No.22995101

>>22995060
"Why are you here? Don't you have elsewhere to sleep? Why can't I sleep in my own bed?"

>> No.22995177

>>22995097

Her place is fine to my knowledge, I think she was just bored and wanted someone to hang out with. Or she's interested in me, I have no fucking clue. Maybe I'll sleep in the bed, or at least on it, though if it feels weird I'm out.

>>22995101

She said she's here because there's nothing to do at her place, and I *can* sleep in my bed, she's not stopping me.

>> No.22995216

>>22995177

Yep. She wants you to sleep in bed with her, cuddle up, be cozy.

Then in the middle of the night she will grind herself against you, softly at first then a little harder as you grow. Ever so gently she'll start touching herself while she slowly moves herself against you, then she'll very softly lift herself up off of the bed, slide down her panties, and grind against your hard cock.

So you better stay out of that bed if you don't want sexual bliss.

>> No.22995220

>>22995177
nobody is just crashing someone's place for 9 days because she is bored. She's lying to you. Sorry bro, but something is definetly up with her.

>> No.22995261

>>22995220
Yeah, something is up with either her life, her head or her ovaries.

>>22995177
You can always just sleep above the sheet but under the covers if you're really that gynophobic.

>> No.22995299

>>22995216

Thanks for the advice, will do.

>>22995261

Well no shit something is up with her, like I said, she's one of those super introverted types. Never talks, and if the DM didn't do the game, I bet she'd never leave her room. Again, I'm not all that taken with her, so I'm not about to get freaky.

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