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[ERROR] No.22310376 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Can we get another everything eldar thread going?

>Pics, costumes, novels, fan-fiction, exc.

I'm actually looking for some decent Eldar fan-fiction.

Also, even though Dark Eldar and Craftworlders are at eachother's throats often, would a DE attack an eldar who is obviously and outcast on sight?

>> No.22310503

How do you guys imagine the Crone Worlders look like? I was thinking they're covered pr even encased in wraithbone that has weird outgrowths and generally Chaotic shit going on. The wraithbone looks a bit withered and is almost carrying the bodies of the Eldar. They look more like wraithbone Dryads with bling, weird deformations and heresy all over the place. It'd set them apart from the other Eldar factions and give them a more eldritch feel.

>> No.22310513

>> No.22310533

That redhead's got a nice ass.

>> No.22310571

Can someone give me some recommendations for novels featuring Eldar? Good ones? They don't even need to star. I have heard about the Path series, but it is skub from what I understand.

>> No.22310605

Well, the Fall killed off all the crone worlders. The only reason to go back to those plantes is to get the soul stones.

>> No.22310630

Really? I loved them. Warrior was a little rough, Seer was WONDERFUL and Outcast was not bad.

I mostly enjoyed them because it explored everyday eldar lives.

>> No.22310631


Actually Path of the Renegade turns out to pretty entertaining about halfway into it. The build up is SO boring though.

>> No.22310633

>would a DE attack an eldar who is obviously and outcast on sight?

It's impossible to really give any sort of answer to a question like this. Because the Dark Eldar are so ruled by their whims and emotions, each one is likely to act differently depending on their own tastes and opinions. One might try and kill him as a way of demonstrating the 'superiority' of the Commorite philosophy. Another might try and kill him because he wants his stuff. Or seduce him. Or try and work with him. Or tempt him into joining a Kabal. Or whatever.

>> No.22310660


>> No.22310676

>> No.22310681

Why is so much Eldar stuff named after 'Terra' animals?

>> No.22310683


Part of the plot of Path of the Renegade was that a Ranger 'outcast' made contact with a scheming Archon, and was brought into the Kabal in exchange for his betrayal. So it has a precedent at any rate.

>> No.22310688

>> No.22310690

> it is skub from what I understand

Depends on what you want from the books. They're very character driven and focus quite strongly on the Eldar culture and mindset. If that's what you want, then they're pretty good, though far from perfect and with a bit of a lame ending.

>> No.22310697

>> No.22310720

OP's pic looks like that sister is about to blow off that eldar's tit

I imagine that would hurt a lot

>> No.22310724

>> No.22310726

Deathleaper! Darling! Good to see you again! I knew I'd find you in this thread.

>Contibuting to costumes. I've got a DE costume to share in a moment. It is not mine and I have to go dig it up.

>> No.22310743

>> No.22310757

Loved the culture in it! But the ending was a bit sigh worthy.

>> No.22310769

> Well, the Fall killed off all the crone worlders.
Actually they're still a thing in the EoT. They're bound to serve Chaos, but they have bodies and can move around, though it is all kinda vague. Some Chaos champions have thwm as slaves, IIRC. I also think it was implied somewhere that Slaanesh gave them back their bodies to toy with them, but there really isn't much fluff about them whatsoever. Just a handful of paragraphs outside the Black Library, but that's it.

>> No.22310772

>> No.22310778

Well, keep in mind that the general rule in regards to codices is that they're written from the Imperial perspective. Since they likely have names that are in the Eldar's native tongue, which don't have a direct translation, it's possible that they simply substitute in the name of an animal that is similar enough in form to convey the right idea. Striking Scorpions or Wave Serpents sound much cooler than an almost impossible to pronounce Eldar pronoun.

>> No.22310779

>> No.22310789

>I've got a DE costume to share in a moment.

Awesome, sounds pretty

Unfortunately it's gone 5am here, so I don't have a lot of time to contribute much.

>> No.22310831

> One of the gals from the cosplay group I am in did this. She looked amazing. I'm trying to get up the balls to do a DE myself.

>> No.22310852

>> No.22310861

>dark eldar

>> No.22310877

Oh, that is nice. You should go for it - I've been half tempted to try something similar myself one day, but don't have anywhere near the sort of skill needed to make one of these costumes.

>> No.22310885

I'll accept that.

>> No.22310887

>Also, even though Dark Eldar and Craftworlders are at eachother's throats often, would a DE attack an eldar who is obviously and outcast on sight?

If they felt like it, yes.

Dark Eldar attack other Dark Eldar on sight all the time. For being in the wrong turf, for being in a different faction, for owning something the attacker wants, for fun, for their soul, for the sake of show off their badassery, etc.

So it's not like an outcast Craftworldfag is going to get an easier time of it. Just the opposite. That bright shiny soul is always gonna be a temptation to their Dark brethren.

>How do you guys imagine the Crone Worlders look like?

Older fluff described some of them as being among the mightiest champions of Chaos. I don't know how many are around apart from a handful of champions though - probably very few.

Honestly I'd expect their appearance to vary a lot between groups. Some would likely be the average spike/sigil/skull/daemonface covered Chaos groupies. Others may look more refined or bizarre. Pick a concept and go with it, the one you came up with was good.

>> No.22310901

Metaphorical balls, I guess I should say.

>> No.22310907

also you're a massive sack of fat.

>> No.22310931

cybergoth wear. That's the way to go.

>> No.22310937

>> No.22310971

>> No.22310977

I did the Farseer that I posted earlier

I just got to get up the guts to show the skin. The most I've ever shown was a bit of cleavage before. I'm slowly working on it, the time will come eventually.

>> No.22310992

>> No.22311018

So I'm working on a DE with Eldar allied force that will be modeled as Exodites. How do you all see the Exodites as being? Gone native? Not much different from Craftworlders? I'm kinda thinking about shooting for "have the tech, but not the production". So, simple, somewhat tribal clothing, using the wildlife to help them out, but also wielding glowing crazy magitech weaponry.

>> No.22311022

>> No.22311029

>my life is incomplete unless I'm mean to strangers on the internet

Edgy stuff, kid.

>> No.22311043

Well that is just peachy. I've got an Eldar PC in our RT game and we are going to start the DE module soon.

>> No.22311045

Well, check out the Wych models. They're mostly fully clad, albeit in tight-fitting bodysuits, so showing a lot of skin isn't essential.

>> No.22311050

Should I keep dumping what few Eldar pictures I have?

>> No.22311062

Or literal...you never really know with the Dark Eldar, do you?

If I might ask a quick tabletop question though:
Is it better to take Guardians or Dire Avengers in low point games? I can see that Guardians would give more Heavy weapons, but since it is lower points I would think the Avengers would be a better bet for most stuff I'd expect to see at the 1000 point level or so(I'm new to Eldar, so my army is still small, just a few Warlocks, a Farseer, and a unit of Avengers).

>> No.22311090

Of the two, Dire Avengers. As much as I love them, Guardians aren't very good at all. If you want a unit to hang back on an objective and provide a little fire support, get Rangers/Pathfinders. They're really quite good - their AP1 on a 6 to hit synergises wonderfully with the Directed Shots rule sniper rifles get now.

>> No.22311105

By the Emperor, no!

>> No.22311128

By Eldanesh, Yes!

>> No.22311132

I mean yes of course. keep going.

>> No.22311147


That would be worth looking into! Thanks!

>> No.22311155

Ulthanash >>>>>>> Eldanesh

>> No.22311184

Go for it! I'd do it myself, but I've got to go and sleep now.

>> No.22311192

>my life is incomplete unless I gratuitously patronize strangers on the internet

sooo mature, old bugs

>> No.22311197

I'll second that. Diversifying your firepower is always nice, but guardians are just not good. Meanwhile Dire Avengers are one of the few Aspects that still do what they are supposed to correctly.

>> No.22311209

Anyone got a link to that writefaggotry that was mentioned in the last Eldar thread? "The Soldier and The Guardian"?

>> No.22311228

Since we are on the topic.
I hear a lot about the DE "eating souls" but do they actually do so?

I've always figured that they cause suffering so that Slaanesh eats the suffering instead of their souls.

>> No.22311243

they eat souls

>> No.22311247

Anyone got anytype of writefaggotry for Eldar?

>> No.22311248

I really need to organize my Warhammer folder.

>> No.22311260

>> No.22311264

I imagine you can read any prattle on the internet, and just pretend.

>> No.22311267

As far as I can tell, they don't literally eat the soul. However, they do feed of its suffering and pain which revitalizes them in a real, literal way. To the point where they can basically be brought back from the dead.

I don't remember that ability ever really being explained, I'm assuming its basically the last of their atrophied psychic power.

>> No.22311279

Altharius, which meant in the ancient inscrutible eldar tongue THe Most Elegant of Nobility in The Arts of Graceful Warfare and Majestic Pottery pointed his elegant weapon at the apish space marines, the squad ripped apart by a graceful hail of deadly shuriken fire, the advanced psycho reactive monomolecular wraithbone edges ripped apart their crude armor like a swarm of vengeful wraithbees defending their spirithoney from the starbears of ancient eldar mythology.

Still for every crudely clad clunky stupid clumsy monkey marine killed, a dozen swarmed in to take its place. Their clumsy boxcars puttered slowly towards the elegant firing lines of the most ancient eldritch elegant Eldar, blown away by graceful deadly brilliant lances of energy from the vengeful lances of the glorious guardian squad Thethaliusomis which meant in the ancient Eldar tongue The Squad of Most Righteous Invincible Unwavering Noble Craftsmen Who Craft Death as Elegantly As Their Earthenware.

Altharius danced gracefully through the clumsy bolts belched by the marine's crude gun, if such a clumsy device could even be called a weapon, dispatching one after another with elegant sweeps of his monomolecular finely crafted gem encrusted graceful blade made from the psychoreactive wraithbone, testament to the Eldar psychic and technological mastery.

A stray bolt shell farted through the air and struck Altharius upon his noble chest, but the amazing psycho reactive wraithbone armor of the Eldar which was as flexible as the most sheer silk elegantly shifted and hardened harder than the hardest of hardturtles of ancient Eldar mythology to deflect the crude monkeyshot, veering it into the face of another clumsy marine standing beside him.

>> No.22311293

I don't know if the soul eating is like 'lets crack open his chest and take a deep breath'. As people are slain/dealt pain, it seems they lose something that the Dark Eldar just absorb and use.

How/Why, I dunno. I don't know if its ever explained why this happens, since they don't carry objects that do it, and it doesn't seem to be an Eldar power in general.

So maybe someone else knows.

>> No.22311304

Altharius then somersaulted through the air dancing across the sky like the great elegant hunting falcons of Eldar mythology and in his descent his elegant heel caved in the helmet of one of the crude armor clad monkeys and used the building momentum to spin cartwheeling towards the leader of the marines, a great ugly brute with crooked teeth and a lazy eye and pasty wrinkly skin his crude armor garishly covered in seals and with the crudely banged out symbol of his clumsy god emperor scrawled upon his crude armor. The simple creature's dumb farm animal eyes widened in fear as the spinning whirlwind of eldritch ancient elegant destruction spun towards him and in a graceful flash of majestic advanced wraithbone he was cut cleanly in two by the elegant gem encrusted monomolecular edge.

Their leader dead, the marines hopped back into their boxes and puttered away, but there would be no escape for the crude monkeys as their clumsy retreat was cut apart by an elegant hail of deadly monomolecular shuriken discs and graceful lances of light that cut through the air like the legendary glowwyrms of eldar mythology which once aided The Ancient Mythological Eldar God Vaul as he got lost in the spiritwoods in the legendary mythologies of the eldar's ancient past.

Altharius was glad the war was over and looked forward to returning to walking the graceful path of the potter which staved off the temptations of slaanesh but he walked a razor's edge between indulgence and the trappings of the path which the brilliant eldar mind could fall to such was the tragedy of his people.

>> No.22311309

>> No.22311311

They feed off of the portions of the soul which are torn off by putting a sentient being under amazing amounts of pain and anguish.

Keep in mind the Dark Eldar still hate Slaanesh since he brought down the old Eldar Empire, which they see themselves as the rightful heirs to.

>> No.22311321

>> No.22311335

They also fear Slaneesh, since it seems assumed that Slaneesh could still lap them up at any time if she wanted to.

>> No.22311350

>> No.22311354

I'm not a great writer but if you want an Eldar Fanfic I've got one in progress. (Warning: MP is seriously not a great writefag)

>> No.22311359

>> No.22311370

>> No.22311377


Eldar cosplayers - I'm not surprised in the slightest.

Also, I would do the Low Commoragh rut with her, if you catch my meaning.

>> No.22311383

Well, technically that's what Slaanesh is doing; the reason they feed on the anguish of other beings is because their souls are slowly withering away, most likely being slowly siphoned off for food by the Prince of Pleasure.

>> No.22311404

>> No.22311411

grab her, strangle her and eat her with your bare teeth? That's what low-commorrites do.

>> No.22311416

>> No.22311428

>emo Sliscus with hipster cunts

>> No.22311434


I thought they shit wratihbone.
Kind of explains why they're so cranky about everything.

>> No.22311464

I dunno. I'm trying to organize my folder so I'm dumping what I find.

I don't find much Edlar art during my travels. Mostly Tech-Priest art.

>> No.22311466


Eh. Sure, why not.
Still better than what the nobles would do to you.

>> No.22311469

What manner of fan fiction would please you, anon?

>> No.22311494

fetish fapfic. That includes diapers and ears and lesbians.

>> No.22311495


>> No.22311501

>> No.22311507

Anything Eldar. Seriously. From bloody battles to love can bloom.

>> No.22311515

Blue Striking Scorpion?
I think not.

>> No.22311530

What, no titans?

>> No.22311573

>> No.22311581


Do they actually poop crystals? I need to know for something I'm writing.

>> No.22311586

New to 40k. Why do Elder look human?

>> No.22311608

"odorless, crystalline dejections"

>> No.22311626

Crystal poop was an entire thread a little while back. There is no fluff that actually says either way.

>> No.22311628

Because space elves

>> No.22311642

They were created by mayan ancient astronaut frogmen out of primates.

>> No.22311649

>> No.22311650

I know most Craftworld Eldar walk the path of the Guardian at some point in their lives, but is it usually the first path they walk? If not, what is? Does it vary? I'm mostly wondering what Eldar do for the early portions of their lives- Is it general education analogous to elementary/middle school/high school? Is there martial training involved? Something in between, like Scouts?

>> No.22311683

Path of not shitting yourself would be the first one, I reckon.
Some eldars never master it fully, unfortunately (looking at you, Macha).

>> No.22311693

Guardians are civilians who are defending the Craftworld. It is not really its own path.

>> No.22311705

Similar to the Star Trek explanation, an ancient race made a lot of the current races, with different things in mind. Many of them to fight off ancient space douchebags.

>> No.22311717

Anything, you say?

>> No.22311720

I some how have less pictures than I thought I did.

>> No.22311723

nonono. I say this

>> No.22311725


>> No.22311747

The exception is Tau.

>> No.22311750

I can't find anything that suggests they do.

They were evolved by the Old Ones(ancient, possibly Lizardlike, highly psychc alens) from either an avian or reptile analogue. YOu would have to ask them exactly why they look the way they do, but the Eldar have clear body/facial differences that alude to a different ancestry than primates.

This also explains why they refer to humans as "Mon-keigh"(Monkeys), and do so derisively.

Path of the Guardian doesn't really exist. Guardians are reservists who spend most of the time doing whatever trade it is they perform in the Craftworld

>> No.22311757


It's strange, because I'm playing STO right now.

>> No.22311760

Are diapers necessary?

>> No.22311767


>> No.22311770

Don't the Tau vehicles have Terra animal names too? Like Hammerheads.

>> No.22311772

>> No.22311783

That they do.

>> No.22311785

>I can't find anything that suggests they do.
"odorless crystalline dejections".

>> No.22311791

I don't think there's a set "first path". It's pretty much down to whatever call the individual feels. There are some really basic paths like "dreamer", and some paths like Seer are apparently harder than others. War paths are also looked at with fear/mistrust.

>> No.22311795

>> No.22311805

OP here.

Anything without diapers?

>> No.22311814

Nothing is without diapers.

>> No.22311816

>possibly lizardlike
Officially froglike.

Mon'keigh is not supposed to refer to monkeys at all, it's an eldar word that means "vermin" in general.

>> No.22311830

Again, Imperial designation, they have their own terms for them.

>> No.22311831

Both Humans and Eldar are a spawn of the Old Ones.

The difference between them is that the humans were left to evolve on their own when the Old Ones perished at the hands of the C'tan.

>> No.22311853

true but at least they have:

>> No.22311855


>> No.22311860

>> No.22311872

Thanks for answering my question about the paths.

Kind of brings a new light to things when all of those images of various factions kicking Guardians' asses are saying "LOOK AT US, WE CAN BEAT UP A PEASANT MILITIA."

>> No.22311876

But >>22311747 said that Tau was the exception, which I took to mean that the Tau codex was written from the Tau view and therefore would have their names for their vehicles.

>> No.22311880


Why would the Tau call their vehicles with the names the Imperials have given them?

>> No.22311891

they don't
which is why they have their own terms for them.

>> No.22311898

It does.

>> No.22311919

It doesn't mean that they're untrained at all, though, they follow the Warrior path, just not enough to become aspect warriors.

>> No.22311921

>> No.22311923

>> No.22311926

>Tau Fluff

''Send in the Tigersharks, the Titan must go down''
''Hammerhead on the move, Shas'El''

Where are those terms? I don't see the Tau using them,

>> No.22311936

Yes. Should I start posting here, or would you prefer a pastebin or a google document?

>> No.22311946

>> No.22311958

they don't
they use their own terms
which are in the codex

>> No.22311973

Why do you care so much about that silly OP and his sick fetish for girls that are not wearing diapers?

>> No.22311989

Here is fine, bro.

>> No.22311997

But the similarity in pronunciation, and the fact that they primarily use it to refer to humanity, is hardly a coincidence(Out of Universe I mean, I know t refers to some sort of weird race that enslaved the Eldar long ago).

Those are the ranks of the Tau Military though. Using those is little different than using the term Exarch, Farseer, Warlock, etc. for the Eldar.

Again, because the person reading it is a human, and know them by the Imperial designations, they use the name the codex utilizes rather than a bizarre, indecipherable Tau pronoun.

>> No.22312012

>> No.22312016

you weren't talking about out-of-universe.

>> No.22312018

>It doesn't mean that they're untrained at all, though, they follow the Warrior path, just not enough to become aspect warriors.
Guardians are butchers, bakers and candlestick makers. if they have previously trod the path of a close combat aspect they are often organized into storm guardian units.
but they are not treading the path of the warrior if they are guardians.

>> No.22312027

Every anon deserves compassion, anon.

>> No.22312029

>> No.22312038

A pronoun is not a substantive per se.

>> No.22312041

An awesome drawfag took up my request to do a young Eldar defending his sister from a space marine, but disappeared after the initial rough outline was done. He mentioned he had a deviantart in the thread but I couldn't find it. After asking around I was unable to hunt him down. I hope he's alright, wherever he is.

>> No.22312061

Don't diaper fetishist deserve fapfics? There aren't any 40k-related ones yet.

>> No.22312079

I tried to add "ed" to "follow" but flood control said no

>> No.22312091


In Dow and Fire Warrior the Tau use the supposedly ''Imperial terms'' for their vehicles. How does this make any sense?

>> No.22312093


1: No they don't. 2: Yes there are.

>> No.22312098

It was the same argument again.

"He'll be back, you know." The warlock nearly spat into the dust, examining the field with narrowed eyes, carrying herself with none of the lithe grace of her people. She had removed her helmet some time earlier, and eventually shifted her eyes almost accusingly towards the Farseer, who offered her an almost tired shrug in return. The air between the two of them briefly crackled with eldritch power, providing an interesting but entirely superfluous show for the casual observer.

Eventually, as her partner offered her no further conversation, Idranel developed a sour expression and, deliberately, shifted her weight to one leg.

"You are being optimistic." She ventured, barbing her words with mocking. The warlock heavily kicked a rock in response, sending it several feet before it came to a stop in the nearest ditch.

"You mean I'm being correct. He'll be back, the dick."

"...Paranoid, then."

>> No.22312108

>Yes there are.

>> No.22312120


It would only not make sense if all the dialogue was in the T'au language.

>> No.22312122

Which particular Craftworld is this? That red robe, man. That robe.

>> No.22312126


>> No.22312133

because those are video games...

>> No.22312139

The farseer often found Q'sandria a difficult personality to be around. She was certainly talented and skilled, but she possessed little of Eldar discipline and subtlety, more akin to a mon'keigh in personality and body language than any of her peers; It was difficult to believe that she had been the protege of the late Eldrad Ulthran.

...Speaking of her mentor...

"Perhaps your hostility is a repressed form of longing for a lost teacher?" Idranel offered hopefully, scanning the far horizon, searching for another topic; she knew none were coming for at least four minutes, yet it was the vain hope that kept her pushing relentlessly forward.

The warlock snorted derisively.

"...Necron in my shower... And that stupid hat of his..."

The tone could have been mistaken for remorseful, if it were not coming from such a venomous tongue. The farseer had personally witnessed Q'sandria give an entire squad of Rangers such a verbal flaying that the group had simply disappeared for four years into a forest rather than risk another conversation with her. Her experiences with the venerable Farseer Eldrad had apparently left her with irreparable damage to her psyche. Leaving her bouncing between various warhosts until Idranel had simply accepted her, reasoning that her personality would provide a useful view of cynicism in any campaign.

This had, at least, been what she had said to Caerys, who had raised an eyebrow in response.

The other Farseers of Ulthwe had always viewed Idranel as far too compassionate.

>> No.22312145


I keep seeing pictures of slutified Tau in diapers. I'm sure there's writefaggotry out there to accompany them.

>> No.22312147


>> No.22312150

Meant proper noun. Sorry, my mind derped.

>> No.22312173

probbaly Saim'han

>> No.22312178

You better stop being so sure because you're wrong.

>> No.22312197


>> No.22312200

"Well," She finally responded changing tactics. "If what you say is true, then you are letting him win."

This gave the warlock reason to pause, and she peered over questioningly, raised foot hovering over a flower which, in some seconds, would be crushed.


"Consider it; you insist that Eldrad is a..." Idranel paused, forming her lips into the graceless word. "...'dick'... Yet you let him consume your every thought and action, essentially ruining your life. He has, evidently, set you upon a self-defeating cycle of loathing, incapable of doing anything meaningful for yourself."

The foot came down, and the life of a flower was brutally extinguished.

"...Yeah?" Q'sandria inhaled, baring her teeth in a scowl. "Well he'll be back one day, and every moment I spend hating him, is another moment I know not to let myself get-"

Idranel waved a hand dismissively, cutting the warlock off; Another topic of conversation had finally presented itself.

"Do you know where the path of self defeat brings you? Consider this; what do you suppose Farseer Macha of Biel-Tan is doing right this moment?"

There was a lengthy pause while Q'sandria shifted mental gears, lamely attempted to probe the cosmos for an exact answer, and then finally surrendered to her superior's trap.


A smile stained the Farseer's face.

"Sleeping. Alone. Again."

>> No.22312209

Running very very low here.
Next time make a Tech-Priest thread. Or a Chaos thread.

>> No.22312232


>> No.22312245

>> No.22312250

The lips were sweet but rough, strong but gentle arms pinning her against a bed of indescribable comfort. They were entwined, heart and soul, and their souls danced in joyful celebration at their union, she surrendered herself completely, uttering a name in a soft exhalation of pleasure and joy. The entire world seemed to shake, and everything was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

Then Macha opened her eyes and was alone.

She rose, sitting up in her bed, within a dark chamber with crystalline walls and a cold floor. Reacting instantly to her movement, the chamber hummed to life, filling her vision with a gentle light.

Slowly, Macha looked down at her bed, hoping to find something new.

Her empty love life provided her with an empty bed to stare back at her. Emptily.

Macha watched the spot beside her bed, waiting for it to spontaneously produce... Something.


Eventually, in frustration, she began to beat the empty spot in her bed with her own pillow, savagely thrashing at the space as though it was somehow its fault.

Macha settled on the idea that she had given her absent and entirely mythological lover enough abuse, and laid back down, pulling the pillow over her own face with a weary sigh.

Farseer Macha was a virgin.

She wasn't even certain that her dream had been an accurate depiction of sex.

>> No.22312253

>> No.22312260

Again, Nonsense.

The Tau in those games use Tau terms mixed to describe distances, time, and other races etcetc. If the vehicles had Tau names they would have used them

>> No.22312264

Ossim, symbol seems pretty close.

>> No.22312271

Any interest in half-eldar in this thread?

>> No.22312272

>> No.22312287


>> No.22312296

We have sisters, necrons, tau, and daemons in diapers.

How come we haven't seen any Eldar in diapers? That's unacceptable.

>> No.22312300


>> No.22312312

GW came up with vehicle names in the late 4th edition. they're rarely used and sound gay.

>> No.22312322

anyone want to lend me a pass so i can dump...

>> No.22312344

You must admit- it's a pretty nice color for Eldar.

>> No.22312345

Kin and cousins, please.

Remember the the Blood Feud!

>> No.22312360

also taking requests

>> No.22312379

well at least you aren't Mon'keigh

>> No.22312380

The Tau terms for distance, time, etc., when used in that context, are simple enough to understand as such, due to context. However, since we ONLY know the Tau vehicles by the Imperial designation, and referring to them by Tau names would only serve to confuse the reader. The terms for distance and time are likely used because they don't readily match up to Imperial measures, unless they did it for "artistic flair", which fails because of the obvious lack of consistency

2,955 Aincent

>> No.22312389

The only thing I hate about the Eldar are those stupid helmets.

>> No.22312393

I do have a drawing by Miko with a photoshopped diaper added to it.

>> No.22312424

I'm debating how much to go into the romance in my eldarfic. Is that something people are interested in reading?

>> No.22312430

Mon...Mon'k.... Monkey scum!?

You calling me scum after I dumped all the pictures that I could find!?

Why I outta *shakes fist*

>> No.22312442


>> No.22312452


Eldar do not work that way. At least the only ones that matter

>> No.22312454

Man I bet Eldar sex is amazing. With that psychic connection on top of the physical.

>> No.22312460


I've seen it, and it disgusts me. If you want it so bad you can go comb the archives yourself. I'm not going to deliver your creepy baby fetish to you on a silver platter.

>> No.22312472

So, we going loud Boss?

>> No.22312476

Exclusively if it's really extreme and fucked up (not in a sexual way), otherwise it's not worth it. I'm talking about severe OCD, hysteric and maniac-depressive stuff. Eldar stuff.

>> No.22312480

run off home Mon'keigh

>> No.22312497

If you're talking about the one in which a battle sister regresses, it's an age-regression fic, not a diaper fic.

>> No.22312510

Go for it.

>> No.22312548

You have 2 mins to tell what makes the Eldar better than the Necron.

>> No.22312566

Cities, Macha had been to human cities, like everything else their people built, they were both massive and tactless, structure upon structure built upon ruins of previous edifices which had undoubtedly themselves been structures built upon structures.

In these dizzying, smelly monuments to the ape's achievements, their people scrabbled over one another and stood on the backs of their fellows to glimpse nothing.

Honestly, there was no wonder they referred to them with the terms for insects.

The Farseer thought this as she was passing by a striking scorpion, and presented to them a graceful but ugly nod, which in the language of the eldar indicated that their presence here was ironic.

The warrior returned to her a look that clearly said that they thought she was crazy, and that they didn't appreciate being the subject of a seer's humor.

Bringing herself back to her original line of thought, Macha considered the enormous, glittering spires of her people, adrift in an ocean of stars and streams of light. Eldar had been known to sing songs that could be summed up as 'Our cities are so great, humans are ugly and smell. Life is unfair, I have sex every month.'

Macha always found them annoying.

>> No.22312571

they don't sound as ridiculous

>> No.22312572

Not quite ye-


>> No.22312587

Go on...

>> No.22312589

Right now it is kind of a background thing with a tragic end, of course. I was just wondering about how much it should come to the foreground. I get the impression that the answer is: Very little.

>> No.22312621

tragic end =/= bad end
LCB ends badly but it's not tragic, it's just mildly sad.

>> No.22312649

They are sort of opposites, the same deal but on opposite sides of the same war. Ancient races used as a tool by even more ancient races to try to conquer everything.

>> No.22312652

Thought you'd never ask...

>> No.22312702

I'm digging that color scheme. Makes me want to start Eldar.

>> No.22312884

I'm currently converting this reaper mini in a warlock for my Eldar war host.

>> No.22312937

OP here.

I am reading, my toilet overflowed thought so I'm not posting as much. Too much shit to deal with.

>> No.22312959

Womp womp

>> No.22312967

I could post some of the more exciting bits from my writefagging if anyone is interested. If not I shall keep lurking.

>> No.22312990

Feel free

>> No.22313006

Also one was exclusively made to fight the other ( and sucked at it).

One was made to be able to predict the future (also sucked at it)

And one was too stupid to smother the other while they just decided to sleep off the fight.

I'll give you a hint: it's all the same race.

>> No.22313021

In the Emperor's name let none survive!

>> No.22313026

If there is only one constant in the galaxy it is the absolute incompetence of the Eldar.

>> No.22313057

I made a Chaos thread, Dude. >>22312980

>> No.22313072

So I play Space Marines, but I am working on an Eldar army, I have been thinking about adding Dark Eldar Reavers to my army instead of Eldar bikes. Fluff wise is there any reason this would happen ever?

>> No.22313091



>> No.22313105

Eldar don't look like the things you keep posting.

Eldar look like this:

>> No.22313143



>> No.22313148

I did a fic with a half-eldar sister candidate that ended up getting tortured, right up to having the tip of one of her ears cut off.

That kind of fucked up?

>> No.22313166

> Kinda shy about doing this, but here goes nothing.

- Lost Child -
Alaitoc maiden world hunting ship is looking for Maiden Worlds!
- Cast
(Just to catch you up)
* Aledel Silverwing - Third coms officer. Just barely not an Eldar Teenager. Mum and Dad are Mariners and raised their child on the ship. Dad is the primary coms officer. Mum is a biologist.
* Sereklain - Youngish love intrest. Second coms officer.

And that's really the important ones. Next post shall be story.

>> No.22313191

that's literal torture, I'm talking about eldars being in love in an insane, scary way because that's how eldars do everything.

>> No.22313232

Every morning the farseers of Biel-Tan held a meeting.

Now, unfortunately, there were several things to explain about this; The first is that 'morning' was a difficult thing to properly determine in a city floating adrift in the stars, nevermind that their craftworld, being of an especially militant variety, often sent their warhosts off to the far ends of the galaxy, who often returned after long campaigns around distant stars with some wildly varying daylight hours, which meant that 'morning' was loosely defined as 'whenever more than three farseers happened to be awake at the same time.'

The second was that the closest human word for what the farseers did during this time was 'meeting', but a more literal translation would be 'harvest of ideas in a post dance period wherein one or more knives will be thrown.' 'Knives' in this case being barbs, as insults were fairly common in eldar conversation, 'throwing' meaning they tended to be mean-spirited in nature, and 'dance' of course, indicating that eldars liked dancing.

Macha currently sat on a crystalline protrusion within a largely empty antechamber alongside several others of her kind, none of whom were speaking for a variety of different reasons, and while the lights danced around them and spiders made of strange alien glass scurried about on the warm strands of color over their heads, she looked the lot of them over.

There was Brimlorthian, who had a rather poor vocabulary and insisted that the doom of all races would come in the form of 'silvery globs from beyond.'

Beside him was Nimrondilathialan, who at one point had spent the better part of a year in the everforest battling the skullbrood and had emerged carrying the chalice of starbrosia, and took any chance he possibly could to tell the story over and over again, which is likely why so many seers in his apprenticeship had left after a mere century.

Past them was a female Macha didn't recognize.

>> No.22313239

((Having just relived Sereklain and him being a handsome bastard.))

With a longing sigh Aledel slumped down into the chair and connected with the systems. She slowly made her way through the mental checklist of systems. By the time she was almost done the rest of the third shift arrived in trickles and relieved the rest of the second crew. But no sooner than the last member sat down and completely checked in did the scanners alert her to something.

Although there was no need for words, as they were all mentally linked with one another, they frequently spoke out loud as well as send the messages across the matrix. "I….. think I've got something." She said, trying to focus on it.

"Do not tell me that it is another Khaine damned rock." One of the other men said.

"I cannot tell yet. I am having trouble focusing on it." She said, puzzled.

"Use your mind, not just your hand, Child." He grunted.

"I know how to do my job." She snorted. "I am working on it."

Slowly the blips began to take shape into three small and quick crafts. "Eldar in make." She hollered out of her well.

She could feel the Third Lt shift in his command throne. "What symbols do they bare?" he asked, calmly.

>> No.22313255


>> No.22313272

After a few more moments of focusing, she could not make out the exact symbols but it was enough to know one thing. "Corsairs. Headed towards us but not on a collision course."

"Corsairs?" One of the others asked. "What do they want with us?" The Lt hushed him with a gentle wave of his hand.

"Shall I hail them, Lt?" Aledel asked, getting a positive mental nod from the commander in response

With a deep breath to calm the fire of adrenaline in her veins she connected the two ship's comm systems. "Corsair ship, this is the Alaitocii vessel Valainthir , please state your business."

"This is Rainstealer. Halt your engines and prepare to be boarded." Replied a voice that made her blood run cold with fear.

"Please wait while I retrieve the captain." She said evenly, unsure if she was able to keep her anxiety out of her voice. Her mind flew across the matrix of the ship and brushed the alarm in the captain's room. Now all they could do was wait.

Aledel watched the corsairs through the eyes of her ship. The name of their primary ship did not go without notice. Her name, Aledel, was a form of the word 'rain' when it was produced by the natural ecosystem of a planet. The ship before them used the same form of the word 'rain' in its name.

>> No.22313306

It felt like only heartbeats later that the captain stormed on board. "What is it?" he growled, his platinum hair loose around his shoulders and his uniform only mostly fastened into place.

"Corsairs are threatening to board our ship." The third Lt informed him, sweeping out of the command throne for the captain. "Shall we connect you?"

"Do it!" he snapped perching in is throne, violet eyes shining with determination as the channel reopened and waited for him to speak. "Who is it that threatens to board my ship?" the captain asked calmly despite the anger barely hidden under his features.

"We do, the Rainstealers." The corsair replied coolly.

"We are Maiden Explorers. We have no gold or jewels or anything else of interest to you." The captain said, leaning back into his throne. "Just science and knowledge."

The corsair laughed. "Ah, but it is knowledge that we want."

"We are happy to share knowledge with our kin there is no need for hostile actions-"

"It is not your kin who want it." The corsair cut in.

The captain made a shape gesture and mental slash to cut the link. "All crew: Battle stations!" The message cut into every mind across the ship and the Valainthir became alive with activity in seconds.

>> No.22313377

Is there interest for me to continue? I don't want to be annoying and flood the thread if not.

>> No.22313378

Well it's good to have Eldar threads when they're not related to absurd pig disgusting fan-fics and 'people-that-don't-know-any-fluff-and-instantly-say-that-eldar-are-more-weeaboo-than-tau' and their ilk shitting up the thread.

>> No.22313403

Writefaggotry is always welcome.

>> No.22313453

((Then I shall!))

Aledel grabbed her bag and put it in her lap, setting up the comms well for two occupants. She could not leave until at least Sereklain or her father arrived.

Almost as soon as the second chair rose into place, her father slid into the well, fastening his dark hair back and out of the way. He grabbed her by her shoulders and met her eyes, his concern for her well-being at the foreground of his mind, yet still he urged. "Go, my child!" He let go and heaved her out of the well. "Go!"

Just as she left the bridge, Sereklain seized her into his arms and embraced her for half a second. "Be safe." He whispered before breaking apart and flying to join her father.

With a deep breath Aledel ran down the halls to join the others who would take up the role of guardians.

It was at times like these that the discipline of the eldar crew shown. With little direction once the alarms rang the crew moved seamlessly from one station to another securing what needed securing and going to various stations to defend the ship. Despite the amount of traffic and speed at which the eldar moved, not one person ran into another.

>> No.22313553

Aledel slid into the armory and up to her locker. The wraithbone recognized that the owner was beside it and opened as she tore off her uniform down to her skin and pulled out the body suit that sat below the blue and gold armor. She tugged it on with haste and waited impatiently as the suit shifted to fit her small form. Perhaps it was due to growing up on ship rations, or maybe it just destined to be ,but the child of the Valainthir was about a head, sometimes two shorter than the others around her. No one ever made comment of it, but she figured she would not grow much more and would just remain a smaller eldar even into her full adulthood. Because of this her armor always took a few extra moments to adjust to her figure.

Once all of the body pieces were on, Aledel picked up the helm and stared into the dark eyes. With a deep breath she lifted it over her head and resisted the panic of the final tightening and the semi-sentient armor attuning to her mind and body. Finally the helm's air started to flow and she was able to breathe again. She had heard rumor that the armor of the aspect warriors was even more sentient and felt like flesh to them, but the thought of such a thing made her shudder.

Within moments she was at the door fully armed and armored, waiting for the guardian commander to direct her to the proper area. "You two!" he said, pointing to her and another. "Aft cargo guard!"

>> No.22313594

Eldar are more Weeabo than the Tau.

It's a known fact.

>> No.22313662

With a nod, the crewman ran ahead with Aledel right on his heels. "You two! Go guard the toilet paper." She grumbled, not happy about being sent to guard the most basic supplies. At least they would be mostly safe. Now that she thought about it, she had never been in life or death combat before.

Apparently her companion overheard and turned, even behind his helm she knew he was casting her a questioning glance. Aledel shook her head. "Nothing, I am muttering."

It took them a short while to reach the aft cargo hold where the other crewman checked the lock then took up a sentry position on one side of the door. Aledel mirrored him on the other and waited.

>> No.22313680

After several minutes her mind started to wander. She was vividly imaging her father and Sereklain sitting beside each other calling out status updates and assisting the targeting teams. Despite the obvious danger of the situation, she could help but wonder what the glory of being on the bridge in the middle of combat felt like. A sad thought struck her; the corsairs were Eldar just like them and their race was dying. Why were they shedding each other's blood? It was sickening to think about.

In the back of her mind she felt the ship weapons about to fire, but had completely forgotten how much it made the ship shutter. Suddenly the ship bucked as something stuck them and Aledel was forced to rapidly adjust her footing not to fall. Trying to play it off as normal and not as a lack of attention, she straightened and re-shouldered her weapon.

>> No.22313720

"You should be back on the craftworld." The crewman snorted. "Following the Path of the Dreamer."

"Everyone stumbles on occasion." She said evenly, trying not to take the insult too personally.

"I bet you are the only one not engaged in active combat that stumbled." He said, looking over at her.

Aledel bit her tongue, trying to think past her aggravation to come up with a witty retort, but by the time anything came to mind, it was too late to respond and still save face. The ship bucked again, more violently this time and caused the entire ship to rock.

Gripping her gun more tightly, she looked over at the crewman. "What do you think that was?" she asked, looking around.

"If I knew. I would tell you." He said shortly.

"Is there a particular reason why you are being over curt with me?" she asked with a scowl.

"You mean other than the fact that you are daydreaming while in the middle of a battle? That could get us killed." He grunted.

"You assume I was daydreaming." She snorted.

He stared at her for a long moment before she turned away with another snort. "I refuse to argue about it. We need to focus on the matter at hand." She said curtly.

>> No.22313749

Before he could respond, the sound of combat echoed down the halls with cries of pain and the hiss of firearms. Aledel couldn't tell exactly how close it was and put a foot forward to go peek around the corner up ahead.

"Do not even think about." He said hissed, but she could hear in is tone that he was as nervous as she.

"Says you." She snapped. "You look like you are about to run into the cargo room for cover."

"There is a difference between feeling far and acting on it." He said, with surprisingly soft despite the rest of their exchange.

With a deep breath Aledel glanced over at him. "I apologize. I spoke out of spite."

"You need to get better hold of your emotions and mind. Do so quickly." He said calmly.

The fighting continued for a long while both in and out of the ship. At one point it sounded like the fighting was coming straight for them, but then moved away once more.

"I am going to go see how close it is." She said and started moving up the hall. The crewman protested but she crept up to the corner none the less and poked her nose around it. The hall had several shurikens in the wall and drops of blood scattered about, but no life was visible.

With a shrug she turned at signaled that it was all clear as he was furiously motioning for her to come back. As she re-took up her position she was confident that the worst had past and the rest would be a waiting game.

>> No.22313835

The next buck of the ship was even harder than the last. Both of them had to take a step to prevent from stumbling. Before she could even ask, her com jewel started flashing. "Aft cargo guard." She answered.

Her father's voice answered, firm and commanding. "They are in the cargo hold! Get in there and rout them out!"

"Yes, Father… Sir!" she stammered and turned to the other who not only rolled his eyes at her slip of the tongue but also gestured for her to open the door.

She punched the jewel and the iris door whirled open and they dove into the darkness.

Slowly she crept in, leading the other crewman into the dark cargo hold and listening closely to his footsteps. Her heart was pounding so hard that her chest piece was twitching in response. As she focused for a second to calm herself she realized that the crewman's footsteps had stopped. With the night vision of her helm reacting to her looking wildly around she did not see him.

>> No.22313874

None of them spoke, not with their voices, because all of them were tired either because they had just woken up, or were looking forward to some rest. This combination of tired and irate meant that while their wit was rusty, it was made up for in volume.

Sloppy, sloppy volume.

"You will understand if this is brief." Brimlorthian explained in the way he leaned back and rubbed his eyes with two long fingers. "I have an appointment." He said with his mind, the words hanging tired in the air around them. "That appointment is with my bed." He said by crossing his arms and promptly nodding off.

"Surely even someone with your..." Nimrondilathialan's thought hesitated, which was bad; This tended to mean he was about to break into war stories and start talking about Forever Gates and Neverbooks. Thankfully for everyone, he gathered his thoughts. "...your limited... Your limited..." Nimrodilathialan had not slept in thirty years, having been lambasting his latest apprentice with tales of his exploits for the entirety of that time. Naturally, he shifted gears to a subject he was more comfortable discussing. "...have I ever spoken to you of the Invisible Dragon of the Silver Temple of the Dark valley?"

Everyone audibly groaned.

Macha almost opened her mouth to speak, but the other woman in the room managed to win initiative and waved a hand.

"If this is all, can we finish it? I have nothing to do this year and I am very eager to get to it."

Macha decided right there that she liked her.

>> No.22313883

Carefully she reached her mind out through the room. There were sixteen other minds in the large room, her companion was next to the lights and turned them on. Slowly the lights flicked on, reveling the enormous labyrinth of large crates and containers. "See anything?" he asked over the com-jewel.

"Fifteen in the room." She whispered planting her back against a crate.

"I'll call for backup." He said, switching to call the bridge.

Although Aledel could feel him not far from her, she felt oddly alone against the invaders. She readied her gun and slowly peeked around her hiding spot to spy on the enemy. There were two corsairs creeping towards them and hauling some sort of carbine weapon and sweeping left to right.

"I have got two over here." She whispered she hands shaking as she checked her gun once more.

"Then take them out."

>> No.22313908

It's the ears

>> No.22313922


>> No.22313965

Hands shaking she leveled her gun and stepped around the corner. Her weapon spat a volley of shurikens before making a horrible whining sound before clicking a few times and stopped working all together. One of the corsairs was grabbing his shoulder, obviously hit and trying to stop the bleeding. Aledel managed to duck back behind the crate just in time for their weapons to fly past and impact the crate behind her. The sound different from shurikens, but she was not able to guess exactly what they were.

"My gun is broken." She hissed into the jewel and drew her knife, unable to run without getting filled with holes. She waited for them to come around the corner and she waited for her companion to answer.

>> No.22313974

Eldar are weeaboo as fuck

>> No.22313988

There were more shots from further down the rows. There was silence from both her jewel as well as the rest of the room. The lack of sound was so thick she could have choked on it. Heartbeats past and the shooting started to pound into her crate again.

Handing shaking so hard that she could barely activate the jewel on her helm, she tightened her grip on her knife and sent another transmission. "B-bridge. This is aft cargo…. There are fifteen invaders in here. My crewmate is not responding…." She swallowed, wondering if her voice was filling the entire bridge or just her father's well. "…. And my gun is broken." She swallowed the lump in her throat and resisted the urge to say good-bye. "Some back up would be appreciated."

The shoots paused and her father's voice filled her ears. "…is on its way. Sta—"

At that moment someone grabbed her by the collar and pinned her back against the crate by her shoulder, tearing off her helm with so much force that it pulled one of her earrings from her ear, leaving the rest of the message unheard.

>> No.22314052

As she instinctively reached to assess the damage of her burning ear, a hand closed around her throat. As her vision refocused, two corsairs came into view. One was holding her by the shoulder, the other by her throat. She gagged at the pressure on her throat.

"Well, look what we have here." The one at her throat said softly. His face was smooth and young with a wild look that twinkled a little too much at her pain.

"Who are you, little girl?" He said, looking her up and down. "You've obviously never been in combat, I'm not even holding you that tightly and you are acting like you are dying." He laughed.

"A guardian. What else?" she sneered grabbing is wrist in her free hand. The other tightened its grip around her knife and held it as inconspicuously as possible. At the moment, it was best to leave it as back up.

>> No.22314088

He bared his teeth and tightened his grip. "Your name, Child." He snarled in her face.

"A-Aledel." She grunted.

"How long have you been on this ship."

"Almost my whole life." She answered after a pause.

"Good." He said with a smile. "Then you know the way to the bridge."

Her eyebrows knitted, the urge to protect almost flaring over logic. She shook her head as best she could. "N-no."

He laughed. "Oh yes, once we take out the bridge the rest will be a breeze."

She howled in rage and drove the knife into her captors belly. He grunted and took several steps back. After the half moment it took for everyone to realize what happened someone twisted her wrist until she dropped the knife and slammed her face first into the crate and pulled her sword and pistol off. They spoke back and forth in a dialect of the eldar tongue that was beyond her understanding.

>> No.22314114

>"After the half moment it took for everyone to realize what happened someone twisted her wrist until she dropped the knife and slammed her face first into the crate and pulled her sword and pistol off."

Bit heavy on the ands, there. Liking it so far though.

>> No.22314119

"Let me go!" she demanded, trying to get free. If there was one bonus of being as small as she was, it was that she was tricky to hold on to.

"Why should we?" The one who had her laughed.

At least he laughed until she slipped free from his pin and threw a punch at his face. He slid out of the way like a breath of wind and grabbed her wrist which she twisted out of like water and dove for her knife.

The corsair with a knife in his belly snarled a curse and shot a single shot at her. It buried itself deep into her thigh. She howled in pain and landed on the floor. Her fingers around her knife and slowly pushed herself into a sitting position, almost getting sick at the sight of the long shard sticking out of her flesh. Her armor tried to tighten around it to slow the bleeding. She gasped, trying to breathe through the agony, eyes locking in sheer hate on the leader who had shot her.

>> No.22314145

Rolled 47


>> No.22314151

Seriously thanks for the feedback. (Esp without being unkind about it. My main editor is on strike at the moment.) I'll take a look at it, when I re-edit what I've done so far and go back to writing tomorrow. I'm glad you are enjoying it! That brings be great joy to hear!

>> No.22314212

"Throw it away." Ordered the second corsair who was now also point his gun at her.

Nothing but sheer hate and stupidly motivated how Aledel obeyed the order. The knife flew from her fingers. The leader tried to dodge but only managed to maneuver into a position where the knife cut right through a part of his side with nothing but a body glove. A cry of pain escaped him and he dropped his gun. Aledel's lucky victory was brutally short lived as the uninjured turned his gun and struck her across the temple.

>> No.22314222

With a grunt that did not quite match the force by which she was stuck, Aledel collapsed into a heap on the ground. Her vision swam and she was barely able to stay conscience much less keep fighting. As she blinked to concentrate on the world around her she saw two more corsairs stomp up, dragging the other crewman behind her. She watched as the jewel in her helm flashed repeatedly with incoming messages.

"Fetch the commander." One of them barked and she watched one of them turn and stomp away. Aledel shut her eyes for just a moment, having trouble remembering exactly how she ended up on the floor. She didn't fight as all of her senses shut down and her mind retreated away from the world of the conscious and dipping her into darkness.

>> No.22314233

That is actually the end of that chapter. Shall I leave it there or continue into the next part?

>> No.22314267

Are there any 40k equivalents to the High Elf heroes?

>> No.22314269

If you have more you may as well post it- I can't be the only person reading this thread.

>> No.22314291

Alright, on to chapter three: Just An Opportunist.

>> No.22314307

Chapter Three: Just an Opportunist.

Someone's hand slapped down over Aledel's forehead, slamming her back into consciousness. She groaned as the touch send waves of hot, wet, pain shooting through her head. When she tried to pull away the touch turned into a grip. She gasped in pain and protest as cold tendrils of psychic cut into the heat of her mind.

She tried to mutter something in protest but her voice never managed to form words as the invader grabbed at recent memories. As she tried to process what had happened she found herself remembering the first thing she was sure of…

/////Rainstealer wanting to board. Her father sliding down into the well, urging her to go despite his concern for her safety. Running out of the bridge and coming across Sereklain. His fear at the situation but desire to do his duty. Running down the halls to the armory. Getting in her gear. Being sent with another to guard the cargo bay. The attack. The fear. Their desire to harm her father and Sereklain. Her brash moves to get free….////

>> No.22314339

She could feel the intruder mentally map out the way to the bridge and a feeling of satisfaction. As he started to withdraw she decided that she could probably just lay here until her mother came to find her.

Her mother. The invader grabbed onto the thought like striking prey. Aledel tried to resist, to pull it back but he mercilessly dragged an image of her mother to the forefront of her mind.

///////Graceful, beautiful, intelligent. Her eyes and hair changed day by day depending on her mood, but they were always sad. Especially when they looked upon her daughter. Where they sad because she was disappointed in her daughter's lack of interest in the sciences? Was she shamed that they had not raised someone with better discipline? Or perhaps she was just sad that they had not discovered a Maiden World.//////

She could feel his smile and satisfaction that he had also discovered one of the scientists. With glee he clawed for a route to the lab. Aledel's fear flared followed quickly by anger. With every ounce of her will she kicked back at the man's mind, shoving him out just enough to realize that he was the commander of the corsairs.

>> No.22314356

She found strength growing back to her. "No." she managed to get out. The word was quiet but filled with venom.

The moment of rest was barely two heartbeats before the commander seized her head again, gripping tighter than ever but having trouble holding on to her blood slick head. She tried to turn away but he decided to grab her throat for extra traction. "Let go!" she croaked, it was almost… almost a plea.

The same low, cold voice that had answered the original hail replied to her. "Stop struggling and it won't hurt so much." He threatened. Aledel felt something under her scalp shift under his grip. It was a sickening feeling, almost enough to make her vomit if she wasn't so desperate to escape.

>> No.22314362


I'd totally do some writefagging of my own.
Don't know shit about Eldar though. Carry on!

>> No.22314398

You realize all your doing is posting your stories so they will get stolen and used to get money by people other than you, right?

>> No.22314404

When it really comes down to it, they are psychic space elves. Summarizes everything pretty well.

>> No.22314419

I am very flattered that this is being enjoyed so much. This motivates me to write more chapters tomorrow.

"What do you WANT!" she yelped, trying with her whole body to squirm away as life returned to her limbs. By Isha's tears her leg hurt! The shard in her leg had almost been forgotten.

"It does not concern you, Child." He growled and rammed through her weakening attempts to keep him out. Aledel cried out in shock and pain while struggling relentlessly as he dragged the route of her mind.

Finally he let go, standing up with a grin of victory. "Thank you, Aledel…." He said, his voice as slick as oil. "…for your co-operation. I must say, I am rather fond of your name."

"You are a pig…." She whispered, trying to roll over but felt too heavy. "… for turning your blade on your own people like this."

"Pig?" He smirked. "No, just an opportunist." As he past his subordinates he ordered. "Tie her up with the other!"

Rough hands dragged her away on her knees and dumped her on her face once again and tied her hands behind her back before leaving the cargo hold unceremoniously.

>> No.22314424

Fuck DE armor is so cool.

I like to think that all my Kabalite Warriors on skimmers shooting select targets that seriously need to die while getting passionately high off of violence is one of the best things about playing DE.

>> No.22314438

Aledel was not sure hold long it took for her to focus her eyes and mind enough to completely take in and remember her situation. A stray thought wondered how back her head was if it was so difficult just to see straight. Her eyes feel on the other crewman who was slumped beside her against the grate with his hands tied in front of him. His ash blonde hair was almost stained black with blood.

Fear and anger gripped her again as she thought of the corsairs heading to her mother. Khaine, she had to get out of this mess. She had nothing to cut the robes with and would try to squirm her way to the door if the pain of the shard moving in her leg did make her dizzy every time she move it.

The shard…

The world suddenly focused into a point. The shard was her ticket out of this mess, if she could get it from her leg to her hands she could cut herself free, yes? Curling up into a ball she grabbed the shard with her teeth. Fighting the urge to vomit she tried to wiggle it free but her bodyglove had sealing too tightly around it. She stopped with a scowl, disgusted with herself for acting like an animal when she was a child of Isha. There were more options, she would just have to think of them.

>> No.22314458

The pain in her leg was actually helping her keep focus. After a couple of moments looking around she located the knife. Slowly, inch by inch she heaved herself to her feet and stumbled over to the knife. Plopping down beside it, she started to cut herself free, allowing herself to shudder as she realized it was still wet with blood.

The knife was sharp and the rope was flimsy, soon she was free and she crawled her way over to her helm. Yanking the com jewel free she slowly stood up and headed for the door. "Bridge." She called but only silence answered. "Father?" she asked, willing to take whatever punishment for the breech of etiquette later.

She almost made it to the door when her stomach finally stopped trying to keep hold of its contents. It took her a few moments to recover before she swallowed the rest of the acid down she whipped her mouth. This was when she became aware that an odd clear fluid was dripping slowly from her nose. Not completely sure what it was she did not spare the time think on it and moved into the corridor.

>> No.22314500

Just as she was about to turn off towards the bridge, a screaming from the path to the lab reached her ears. "Bridge! They are in the lab!" she cried over the jewel and started pushing herself along the hall. "I'm going to that location!" she insisted. Their lack of responses made her blood run cold with fear, but talking to them was better than admitting that she was alone.

At the next corridor a large Eldar turned the corner at first not looking at her. He would have towered even over the captain and his clothing looked more like a performer than an officer or corsair with the stripes and other patterns. On his arms were two sharp, pointed tubes that almost brought a sense of recognition to her fuzzy mind but just looking at him made her head spin, and for some reason her heart heavy. When he turned to face her, a mirrored mask reflected her sorry image. In the corner of the mask was a small but definite ace of spades.

>> No.22314510

That was the end of tiny chapter three. More?

>> No.22314535

Read everything you can get yours hands on about Eldar and ask teegee questions when there are Eldar threads.

>> No.22314558



>> No.22314566

Really don't think you need to ask. Onwards!

>> No.22314567

>> No.22314608

Just in case people lose interest! I don't want to clog the thread if they get bored!

For the record the guy who taught me a lot of 40k was a bit old fashioned about the lore of the faction that is about to appear. (aka, the fluff is not completely from the most recent codex)

>> No.22314645

Chapter 4: Arebennian

The young eldar froze, consumed by raw, unconquerable fear. Arebennian… the Solitaire. Doomed to wander alone across the galaxy without a soul, choosing those who could become Harlequins while maintaining the dancers' tradition of assisting the survival of the Eldar race as a whole. It was said that those who heard Arebennian speak were doomed to a pitiful death. As she watched him, every ounce of joy that might have been left in her intended skull was drained from her.

"Arebennian…" She started to tremble, for a moment forgetting the screams of her mother and fighting the urge to run. Aledel could feel his eyes on her. The silence was so full of expectation that nothing dared to penetrate it put a drop of blood falling from her chin to the cold deck at their feet.

After a long moment, the Solitaire slowly raised a finger to where his lips were behind his mask. Even such a simple gesture was filled with more grace than she had ever witnessed. With a single crook of his finger, he beckoned her to follow before moving down the hall towards the lab with the calm, power and serenity of an ancient river.

>> No.22314684

>The silence was so full of expectation that nothing dared to penetrate it ***but** a drop of blood falling from her chin to the cold deck at their feet.


>> No.22314697

Unsure of why her feet were obeying when her mind was in such turmoil, the young one crept after him, keeping back several paces. Their progress was slow and she used the wall for much support. She wondered why he was moving without any urgency, surely he was not keeping pace with her. In fact, she wondered why he was here in the first place. Not once did he glance over his shoulder to see if she was still following, but her heavy steps and breaths was probably all he needed.

Another cry came from the lab, without a doubt it was her mother's voice, but it did nothing to increase the Solitaire's pace. By instinct Aledel dashed forward by two clumsy steps before the Solitaire's mask turned on her. She froze and looked away like a child in trouble, for some reason shame filled her cheeks.

Without a word he moved forward again until they reached the iris door of the lab, he reached for the activation jewel then paused and gestured for her to go ahead of him. Bewildered but not daring to argue she stepped in front of him and took a deep breath. She gripped her knife in her fist and glanced once more at Arebennian. He nodded and hit the jewel.

>> No.22314736

"Moma?" she asked as the door whirled open before her.

Allena Silverwing was on her knees. The commander of the corsairs had her by the hair and a knife to her throat. In her mother's eyes was a rage that she had never seen before as the scientist snarled curses at the others who were tearing the lab apart. At the sound of the door opening, or perhaps she felt the presence of her child through her rage, Allena turned, eyes wide in horror and yelled. "Run, Child!"

The young eldar did not hear her words. The sight of her mother in such a disgraceful position lit a fire of Khaine in her and she threw herself into the room with a shriek, caring nothing for her injuries or well-being. In a blind frenzy she charged at the commander with every intention of making sure his life would end.

The commander was forced to throw Allena away to successfully dodge the frenzied child's wild swing. "I thought I dealt with you in the hold!" he snarled.

>> No.22314755

This gave the scientist the half second she needed to pulled her child down and restrain her. Before the commander could strike back at the glaring scientist he froze and his eyes raised just over her shoulder. He froze, and this caused the others to pause and glance over to the door. In turn each one of their faces turned to masks of horror.

Aledel by instinct stopped fighting as her mother encased her in a maternal blanket of safety. Gasping to calm down the scent of cut plants and fresh soil filled her senses and slowly calmed her from her frenzy, though anger still pounded like fire through her veins.

The Solitaire looked upon each of the corsairs one by one before turning his mask on the commander and beckoned him forwards with a single finger. The smell of urine filled the air as the commander started to take slow steps towards the Solitaire, knowing his death was heartbeats away. The moment he was within arm's reach, the doomed one reached out and grabbed the commander by the collar and yanked him close. Sounds of whispers filled the room.

>> No.22314778

Watching with grim curiosity behind the shield of her mother's arms, Aledel tried to find some sort of pity for the man, but found very little of it. Fingers searching, she found her mother's hand and squeezed it. This only made Allena's embrace tighter and gently rubbed her face in her child's blood slick hair.

The Solitaire dropped the commander into a whimpering ball of tears and urine. He looked at the two women on the ground. Aledel found just enough courage behind her mother's shield to mouth 'Thank you' to him. He bowed slightly and disappeared out of sight. The second he was gone the others dropped their weapons and scampered out of the room like fleeing cats, leaping heartlessly over the commander.

There was silence for a long moment in the lab before Aledel wiggled out of her mother's arms. "We need to go make sure Popa is alright." Standing up was easier than before, but her veins were still hot with anger.

>> No.22314805

She limped over to the commander and grabbed his pistol. "Get up." She snarled. "Don't be so pathetic, if you pull yourself together and get your men out now I am sure our ship will show mercy, unlike you." Her voice was low and full of venom. If her leg moved right she would have kicked him.

"Come on, Mother." Aledel said, holding the pistol out for her.

"Aledel, you are too driven by emotion right now." Her mother said softly, getting to her feet. "Do not fall to Khaine's curse."

"He raped my mind to find you and Father, then put a knife to your throat." She said coldly, leaning against the wall of the door and folding her arms in front of her chest. Her soulstone was hot with warning against her chest and she rubbed it gingerly.

"Aledel." Her mother said once more. "You need to calm yourself and rebalance your mind. The doomed one AND the great enemy exist because of our emotions."

>> No.22314828

The young eldar locked her jaw which threatened to quiver and took a deep, shuddering breath. "I know. I am trying. I will meditate a whole day after this but… let us make sure the rest of the ship is alright! I know the others were headed to the bridge to take it over!" she urged.

"The bridge will be fine, Raindrop." Her mother said gently. "For now we need to get this one to the brig."

"We?" Aledel asked, looking pointedly at her leg.

"I will carry him but you are not leaving my sight." Allena said stepping forward and taking the pistol and putting it in her coat pocket.

"But…" she started to protest.

"Aledel!" her mother said with a raised voice. "You have been beaten until you can barely stand AND you frenzied! Do you really think for a second that as your mother that I am letting you out of my sight?"

>> No.22314838

Commentary is welcome, by the way.

>> No.22314862

As her mother lifted to commander into a standing position and started walking him to the brig, which thankfully was not too far away. Aledel pressed the com jewel. "Bridge, lab is secure. I see no casualties in here. We have the commander and are taking him to the brig."

They moved in otherwise silence before depositing the man in a cell. He crawled under the bench and started sobbing uncontrollably. As the two women moved into a guard station Aledel immediately slid down onto the bench with no small help from her mother. She gulped for air, breathing heavily. "The bridge still has not answered…" she muttered.

"They are probably co-ordaining the rest of the ship." Mother replied, grabbing Aledel's chin and moving it up some to get a better look at it.

>> No.22314877

There was a small split in the skin, but in just the right light there was a small indent. "But what if they are trying to defend the bridge?" she asked softly, her eyes shining with barely held tears.

"The bridge is one of the safest places on the ship. Far more secure than the lab or even the cargo bay." Her mother comforted and started looking around for the med-kit.

Aledel looked down at her thigh and rubbed above it, the tightness of the bodyglove was uncomfortable. "I have never been shot before…" she said quietly.

Allena pulled out a med-kit from a storage crate and sat down beside her daughter. "I doubt it will be your last." She said sadly.

The young one looked her mother over up and down as she looked through the contents of the kit. "Are you hurt, Moma?" she whispered.

"I'm a little roughed up, but I am fine." Mother pulled out a silk cloth and a bandage.


"I promise, now hold still, Child." She said putting the cloth against her head.

"Ow… you do not have to do this." Aledel grumbled. "The healers can."

"I'm just stopping the bleeding. You can go to the medbay afterwards but I want you to look presentable." Her mother assured.

"Presentable?" Aledel asked in wonder. "To go to the medbay?"

Mother smiled at the small joke. "I can get you feeling well enough to walk there. Unless you'd rather keep walking around with blood in your eyes."

>> No.22314892

Threads getting closer to autosaging, so I've been waiting to comment. Enjoying the story quite a bit, though. Really nicely written- can tell that it could use a few proof-reads but still quite enjoyable.

Here, does a great job of changing the feel of the story from concerned panic to just sheer fright and pause. Middle paragraph was a nice touch- thought that was well done.

Might be worth it to throw this up on 1d4chan, if you feel like it. That site could always use more story content.

>> No.22314907

As her mother fussed with her head, Aledel let her mind wander to a whole new set of daydreams. Some of them she did not doubt would become nightmares. Eerie as it was, the Solitaire had saved them. Why?

The prickle of the medicine in the cloth brought her back to the room. Looking her mother over, she noted her messed hair, bruises and torn sleeve, but seemed mostly intact. She winced slightly as her mother started wrapping her head. She would have pulled back if she wasn't sure her mother would smack her for squirming.

"What will happen to the commander, Moma?" she asked.

"Only time will tell. The curse is slightly different for each, but rumor has it that we will have the same fate as the doomed one."

"Really?" Aledel asked, wide eyed.

Mother simply nodded slowly and tied off the bandage.

"Alright." Aledel said, starting to stand up. "Where to next?"

"Ah!" her mother barked. "Sit! I am not through with you yet."

>> No.22314952

It is embarrassing but I have forgotten down to archive things there.

Thank you for the complement. I really appreciate it. I don't actually have a whole lot more left. This chapter is almost done and the next one is very short.

At this point I might was well finish posting the rest of it.

>> No.22314965

With a sigh, the young one sat back down onto the bench. "Lecture or leg?" she groaned.

"Leg. But fear not, a lecture will come later unless you want it now." Mother grunted.

"I am alright without it for now or forever if you please." Aledel said, ignoring the dirty look the cheek got her.

"I could pull it out here. If it had been a major vein you would have likely bled to death even without your armor." She observed. "But to be safe I will just wrap it." She muttered and started doing just that.

Aledel winced and made sure the com jewel was well within her ear before leaning her head back against the bulkhead. Things started to dull again and before long she realized she was cradled in her mother's arms and they were moving through the halls. In her ear during brief moments of clarity she heard reports that the corsairs were fleeing and the ship was secure.

>> No.22314986

Lost Child - Chapter 5 - Recovery

Consciousness slowly crept back into Aledel's limbs bringing warmth back to her mind and body. In a sudden moment of clarity, her eyes snapped open and she pushed herself into a sitting position. Her fingers found her head and started to explore her scalp. She found a line of harder skin, but it was no longer tender. Throwing back the sheets she looked over her leg which was completely healed over expect a small scar.

"I have scars…." She whispered in awe before making sure her light robe covered her and pushing to her feet. "And I am alive."

She did not wander far before a pair of hands seized her shoulders. "Where do you think you are going, young lady?" her mother said, turning her around. Despite her firm words, she was looking Aledel over very carefully.

"Moma." Aledel said grabbing her mother's arm. "I am glad you are alright. I was not sure if you were just trying to be brave for me or not."

"I am fine. You, however, were not. Back into bed, I insist on the staff checking you out." Her mother said, betraying nothing of a response to her daughter's last statement.

"I am fine too, I am healed." Aledel responded, pulling her leg out of the robe and showing the scientist.

Her mother scowled at the display of flesh and ushered her back to bed before summoning one of the staff. The med officer walked in moments later nodding to each of them. "I see you are awake, Aledel, and I see you finally got some sleep, Allena."

Neither of the women responded and he started looking both of the injury sites over. "I am not surprised that these scarred, Child, this was quite a traumatic experience. Isha's gift can heal our bodies only as far as our minds will allow it. As you recover from the trauma of the event these scars will fade. Overall you too this very well." His eye cast up to the scientist. "You too Allena."

>> No.22314998

Allena smiled slightly. "Thank you."

He nodded and motioned for them to leave. "Be safe you two, and stay out of my office."

Aledel thanked him and dove for the door. Allena was right behind her, sighing. "This isn't a prison, Aledel."

"It is when I try to leave and get thrown back in." the young on protested.

"Oh do not be melodramatic. You were just getting looked over before you were released. Now let us get back to the apartment so we can get you into something more decent." Allena sighed.

Aledel looked her mother over for a long moment before tearing off down the hall. Her feet pounded into the floor, trying to make up for every step that she couldn't run when she had needed to the most. Even as she ran, paranoia licked at her and her daemons felt like they were around every corner. As the fear grew she only ran faster, her leg aching from the sudden abuse but refusing to stop until she slammed through the apartment door and into her small living room.

She stood in the middle of the floor, leaning over on her knees and panting for breath. As she looked around the room, she noticed her father staring at her over a bowl of food with a raised eyebrow. "Oh…." She said, straighten and trying to act like nothing unusual happened. "… hello, Father."

He looked her up and down. "You ran?"

She rolled her shoulders and shrugged. "I wanted to make sure my leg was alright."

"Right." He said slowly, obviously seeing through her fib. He jerked his head towards her room. "Now go change before you embarrass yourself, or worse, your mother."

Aledel snorted. "I am feeling much better, Father. Thank you for asking."

Eleleri's eyes twinkled with humor. "I figured since you ran that you were feeling well. Now go change."

>> No.22315034

>>>Error: Our system thinks your post is spam. Please reformat and try again.


>> No.22315071

Can add gibberish to the start or end of the paragraph, re-write the entire post (heh), or throw it onto an image. Otherwise you run the risk of an automatic ban by trying to evade the spam filter.

>> No.22315097

I have no idea what forbidden phrase I am using. This is a completely tame scene....

>> No.22315135

Pic it is!

>> No.22315142

Eleleri motioned for her to continue.

Skipping the part where she had frenzied out of embarrassment, she continued. "So then he came in and beckoned the commander to him and..." she swallowed and tapped her fingers on the table.

"… and he spoke to him." Eleleri finished for her calmly.

Aledel paused for a long moment. "Is he still down there?"

He looked her over for a moment then cast his eye down to the bowl of food before him and shook his head.

"Tell me what happened." she urged, suddenly taking on an intensity that would have given her mother a run for her money.

"It is not pleasant…." He said quietly.

"Tell me!" she insisted.

"He hung himself with his clothing." He said slowly.

She nodded slowly. "For a second I thought you were going to say something more gruesome... but still..." Aledel touched her head, twisting a strand of hair in her fingers. "How long have I been asleep?"

"About a week." He said, looking her over carefully and eyes pausing on her head.

She froze for half a second as his statement sunk in. "Really?"

He nodded. "Not only were you fairly injured, it was also your first time needing Isha's gift for a wound. No one is surprised that it look you a little while to heal."

Aledel nodded. "So what did the healer mean when he told Moma that she 'handled it well'? Was she more injured than she let on?"

"All mothers fret when their children are injured." He replied simply.

"Ah, I guess I thought there was more to it." she said standing up. "I'm famished."

"There is some food in the cabinet. But be swift, I am sure your mother will be here soon and will want to… mother you."

>> No.22315167

As Aledel started pulling down a dish, her father spoke again. "In fact here she is with…" he paused.

The door opened and her mother stepped in, followed immediately by the captain. Aledel and Eleleri both stopped what they were doing and stood at attention.

"Aledel." Her mother said, motioning to the leader of the ship. "The captain wishes to speak with you alone. Your father and I will go and take care of a couple of things in the meantime."

Aledel nodded as her father walked past, giving her arm a reassuring brush. With that she was alone with the captain. He motioned for her to sit down. "Please."

There was a couch and a love seat that were not too far from the small dining table. "You are my guest, Sir." she said, trying to stand straight. "Please have a seat where ever you would like. Is there anything that I can offer you to drink or eat?" The young one nodded respectfully, slightly nervous around the captain who she had very little contact with.

"Unfortunately I am not here as a guest, Silverwing. Please have a seat." He said firmly and motioned to a chair again.

Blood turning cold with fear she nodded and perched on the edge of the love seat, folding her hands in her lap. "Am I in trouble, Sir?" she asked, finally finding the nerve to raise her eyes to his face.

His features were sharp even for an eldar and he stood half a head higher than all of the others. A smile spread across his thin lips. "If you were, you would be in the brig already, I can assure you."

The smile did not escape her notice and she relaxed some. "Then what do I owe this honor? You always come for Father or Mother, but not me."

"This is true and I have already spoken to your mother about it, but I wanted to discuss your encounter with the Solitaire." The captain said, standing tall.

Aledel nodded.

>> No.22315182

For the next hour the captain asked her question after question in a similar but much more formal manner than her father. He squeeze her memory for every little detail about the incident. Eventually, the questioning drew to a close.

"Do you know what the Solitaire and the Harlequins do, Aledel?" the captain asked.

"They protect the eldar race as a whole and manipulate us for overall survival. And they perform pieces of our history." She answered, almost from a text book.

The captain's violet eyes rested on her forehead. "With that in mind, do you have any theories on why he was here?"

"I have not been awake for very long to give it great thought, I figured that it must have something to do with this ship. Perhaps this ship's survival will be important in the future." She guessed.

The captain nodded. "It is all theory and speculation at this point. None of us will ever know but the dancer himself."

"The action saved Mother." She guessed again. "Maybe she was the important factor."

"Or perhaps you are." He said frankly.

Her lips parted slightly to speak but was quiet for a moment. "I... I do not know. We were moving to rescue mother so..."

"You were headed to the lab either way, yes?"

She stood up, suddenly filled with an odd feeling of foreboding. "I was… because I didn't think anyone else was. Mother was screaming. Where else was I to go?"The question was rhetorical.

Captain motioned for her to sit back down. "If Arebennian had not been with you, the Corsairs would have likely killed you for being a nuisance."

She sat back down and slowly looked up at him. "I guess you are right."

"Like I said, though, we will never know the answer. It is not something you need to worry about. It may have been as simple as stopping eldar from fighting one another." He said simply.

>> No.22315192

Aledel frowned. "I think we would see a lot less violence between factions if that was the case. I still can't believe that it happened. It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I truly do not understand why it all happened in the first place."

"Neither do I, the commander killed himself before I could interrogate him." The Captain snorted.

"I just..." she took a deep breath and swallowed, trying not to show weakness. "I know a piece of me died the other night. I feel so much older in such a short time." Aledel rubbed her leg, feeling the knit of the scar tissue.

"Because we were boarded or because you saw the Doomed One?"

Her lips parted and she actually had to think about it. "Just the cruelty of the entire thing... I was so naive. I never imagined our kin turning on another like that."

The captain nodded sadly. "It is, unfortunately, the way of things now and there is little we can do to avoid it."

"It is like I've gotten a taste of the world outside this little paradise of a ship, my home since I was an infant. I know how foolish this sounds but... is there anything I should know? Anything else I should know if one day I leave this path for another?"

The captain paused. "The world is a much crueler place than you can imagine. What happened last week was just a small taste of it. Meditate and recover, Aledel. We will see you on duty again in two days. Thank you for your time."

>> No.22315281


This is all I have written. Since the craziness at work has died down I will actually not be too drained to write again.

If you feel like it:

Please tell me which characters you like and what aspects of the story that you enjoyed.

I've got a LOT of material for this story and not all of it is going to make the final cut.

I've got romance, more family interaction, more stuff with the captain, exploration, exc. But what would you enjoying seeing more of?

What about this was good so that I can bring more of that aspect to the story as I pull it together.

>> No.22315316

I wanna see her 'grow up' to be a harlequin.

>> No.22315327

This is the link to the whole story. I basically posted most of here though except for the first chapter and part of the second. The rest shall go here too.

>> No.22315368

MAIN nitpicking: Much of the dialogue felt rather human, compared to some novels like Path of the Warrior, and so on. I'm constantly expecting the Eldar to scrutinize each and every spoken word, get irked at the littlest body posture. Given, they've been kind of shooting/stabbing eachother, but that's what mostly threw me off. And it's prolly just nitpicking anyways.

Gotta love crazy space clowns. Aledel and mother were both likable enough. Mostly would like to see some exploran, family interactioning, and romance. All of the above, then. Glad to see you made a static page for it too.

>> No.22315388

Maybe eventually. I've got the next 3000 years of this poor girl's life worked out. (It might sound fussy, but you will see much later why it is so long.) But I just don't know, she is still young. I will not rule it out.

>> No.22315407

No time to comment . . . too busy enjoying the read.

Wait a minute . . .

>> No.22315453

>Much of the dialogue felt rather human
This is actually something that has been brought to my attention before. So I made an effort to eldar it out a little more (while re-read the path series for the feel) when they were not stabbing. I will continue to work on it, but any advice on how to do it would be appreciated.

I have yet to decide exactly where Part I will become Part II but it will be in the next chapter or two. Part II will be a whole different ball game and get a little... odd.... you could say? They find a planet with many mysteries.

Aledel and her little BF well.... I have lots of snogging scenes to weed through and need to decide how much to keep and cut. Young, wild eldar kids, ya know?

>> No.22315566

An easy fix might be to try and slip on some 'Ye old english in there. Anything that might give them a more cultured, archaic feel. Quickly skimming through the writing much of the later bits seem to hit this nicely. Perhaps just read a sentence and think 'Would I ever choose to use these words?' or 'Would this sound natural if I said it in that circumstance?' Regrettably I'm more of a reader then a writer, so I can't really think of much else that might help.

>> No.22315570

Um... so it turns out that I have started the next chapter.

I won't officially publish it yet but....

.... do you want to see it so far?

>> No.22315592

*nod* Thank you. Also trying to keep those freaking contractions out! I have much to edit...

>> No.22315606

I'm personally going to pass out (very soon and very fast), but go ahead and post it. I'll happily read it on the foolz archive.

>> No.22315637

Quiet settled over the ship in the weeks after pirate attack. Although life was not different than before, a certain calm had blanketed the crew. The soul stones and bodies of the departed were gently stored in suspension until they could be returned to the craftworld and the injured were healed and returned to duty.
Other than her various duties Aledel had been busying herself with her drawings and visits with Sereklain. Slowly the fear of the attack became just painful memories and were not invading her thoughts every moment. That had been replaced with the handsome young eldar who had taken a deep interest in her company. They would talk late into cycles about life, joy and the future.
It was on such a night that the general alarm went off. It was a proximity bell that indicated when they were approaching a large structure. The two young eldar paused in their giggles to listen.
“You don’t think….” Sereklain began.
“It would explain why father has been in a particular good mood lately. If he knew we were approaching one.” Aledel said quickly sizing his hand and pulling him out into the hall.
The two of them tore off through the veins on the ship until they burst onto the bridge. Sereklain dropped her hand and slid off towards the com well.
The bridge was absolutely silent, and all eyes were locked on the main view screen which was filled by a large blue and green sphere dotted with sweeping patches of white.
“Is it…..” Aledel whispered, unable to form the word.

>> No.22315652

A gentle pair of hands fell on her shoulders and gave them a comforting squeeze and filled her mind with pride and comfort. “Yes, My Daughter, it is a Maiden World.”
Eyes hot with pride and accomplishment, Aledel let a tear slip onto her cheek. “Praise Isha…”
Allena wrapped her arms around her daughter, her own face speckled with tears. “We found one.”
Aledel grinned up at her mother. “You are going to have a lot of plants to look at.”
A laugh was the scientist’s first response. “Indeed I am, child.”
“Captain?” Aledel asked, unable to contain her excitement. “When do we go down?”
The captain turned in his throne and looked at the women, his features soft with greatly contained joy. “A day or so. We must make sure it is safe first.”
Aledel slipped from her mother’s grasp and slid down into the comm’s well, feeling that her mother was not far behind. “Popa? Did your scanning find this?”
Eleleri looked over at her with a soft smile. “I believe so, Child. I have been tracking it for a few days now. I did not say anything just in case it was not what we hoped for.”
Aledel kissed the side of his head. "I'm proud of you." her eyes raised over her father's dark head and looked at Sereklain who occupied the secondary com seat. Sereklain must have felt her eyes on him, because he looked up at her and smiled, treating her to a wink before going back to work.
The young eldar was forced to allow herself a less than pure thought about him until someone grabbed her by the elbow and hauled her out of the well. “Be careful, Raindrop.” Her mother scolded quietly with a smirk. “I think the whole bridge felt that.”

>> No.22315669

Ok! That was all of it! A preview in exchange for you all hanging in there and reading all of it! It is a rough draft though!

>> No.22315708

Hanging in, barely. Sleep beckons.

Enjoyable read so far. Always great to see well written 40k fiction, or fiction in general. No doubt a handful of other people had fun reading this too. Keep at it!

>> No.22315810

Sleep beckons me too. I think I shall fall to it soon as well. I might lurk a little longer.

You honestly make me blush telling me it is well written and that you enjoy it. This encourages me to continue it after putting it off for a month. (Even if I had a good reason)

>> No.22316190


>> No.22316743

Hot-damn, can anyone who knows how to archive archive this thread? Eldar writefagging is rare enough as it is without it being lost in the 404's.

>> No.22318689

Crone World Eldar (aka. Chaos Eldar) do still exist, but in very small numbers. They tend to be very powerful servants of Chaos (since you need to be pretty powerful for the Gods to bother keeping your soul safe/not eating it).

>> No.22318966

Eldar (and Tau) vehicle and unit names are supposed to be Imperial translations/designations. For example, the actual Eldar name for the Falcon tank is Faolchu, a bird in Eldar mythology that delivered to the legendary hero Eldanesh Anaeris, the Sword of Dawnlight, for him to do battle against Khaine with.

Tau vehicle names seem more arbitary, as they're for some reason all named after fish, which doesn't really make much sense (while T'au does have seas, the climate is largely arid and the Tau originally evolved on savannash and never really engaged in ocean-faring). Fire Warrior is a direct translation of the Tau term (Shas'la, where shas means fire and la is a term for a low rank in an organisation; in the case of the army it means soldier).

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