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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.22306557 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

You are a fighter pilot of the 501st Joint Strike Wing and you've just been cornered by the aide to the chief of RAF Fighter Command and behind you stands Nicholas Mackintosh, XO of the Navy vessel you just tried to steal ice cream from.

This is the third ship you've visited this month, and all in all you prefer the Fitzgerald - you know, the one that was on fire and infested with aliens trying to kill you.

"Yeah," Mack says, holding his palms up to Maloney. "Yeah. So." He strokes his chin thoughtfully. "How...." he makes vague motions at you, then at Maloney and his pack of subgun-swinging goons. "Arrest? Care to explain this?"

"Constable?" Maloney says smugly, and a slightly portly man in a suit steps forward, looking a bit awkward. "Well. The American Army has declined to bring charges against this... pilot under the Uniform Code of Military Justice, and, ah, certain gentleman of high rank in the Royal Air Force have expressed disinterest in pursuing military-to-military complains. However, much of what this pilot has done is fully prosecutable under English civilian law."

Mack raises his eyebrow. "And you didn't collar him on the island because...?"

Maloney opens his mouth, but the portly little constable just raises his hand in a 'bitch, please' gesture and plows on. "The island is the private property of the Witch Sisterhood - not that there's a single legal entity like that, per-se, but in centuries past it was quite literally the sovereign territory of Witches, not just private property of Crown subjects. Much like Papal possessions. There's hundreds of years of history. The legalities are... complex."

"I think I get the picture," Mack mutters.

>> No.22306567

inb4 panzer

>> No.22306572

>> No.22306603

By the way, if you were hoping to find more Lewd Witches CYOA....check tofusaur.us

Good luck, Deme!

>> No.22306613

>mfw

Maloney, what the fuck are you doing.

>> No.22306621

ITS TIME

>> No.22306623

inb4 Panzer

>> No.22306652

>>22306557
>English civil law
the least intimidating civil law of all!

>> No.22306653 [SPOILER] 

TRUST IN PLANEFAG
BOUNCE FOR THE BOUNCE GOD

>> No.22306657

Inb4 bodily thrown from US jurisdiction to barin, bypassing British sovereign territory due to an airborne state

>> No.22306661

>>22306652
mm, delicious torts

>> No.22306666

British Authority + British Civil Law + US Vessel + US Serviceman = GREAT TERRIBLE MESS.

I can already see the clusterfuck storm rumbling on the horizon

>> No.22306679

where the fuck is panzer anyways

>> No.22306682

>>22306557
Storms 'ah brewing captain
>>22306666
nice quads

>> No.22306694

>>22306679
Eating, World of Tanks, beating his stoat, Who knows.

Inb4 Panzer

>> No.22306703

>>22306557
FU Maloney! We are US Serviceman on US vessel!

British Civil authority has nothing to do with this!

>> No.22306728

oh we must pay back the bitch who sent this man...

>> No.22306732

Yoshika frowns. "So how come we're all there?"

"The base is rented by the RAF," the constable tells her. "Much like many temporary airfields around England are rented from the farmers who's fields they're built in."

"The POINT is," Maloney says, "Is that we're in England, and this little shitbird can't hide behind the skirts anymore-" he sneers at Robin and Yoshika, but especially Robin, in her revealing tank-top - "no matter how he tries."

"Yeeeah," Mack says. He looks down at the deck of the California, then slowly scans the entirety of the battleship, turning in a full circle, as if amazed to suddenly find himself on the deck of his own vessel. "About that."

"Extradition procedures go through governments," Maloney says. "And you happen to be the highest-rank representative of the United States Government currently available, at this ungodly hour. Just turn him over, and I'll be out of your hair."

"... and if I don't?" Mack asks, very, very gently.

Maloney's eyes darken, and his expression sours. "Then things get very interesting for you, sir. Leigh-Malleroy is not without his friends in the Admiralty, among other places."

Mack's face is completely expressionless as he turns his one good eye to bore through you.

"Well?" he says. "Why shouldn't I just turn you over and get you the hell off my ship?"

>reasons?

>> No.22306751

>>22306732
because the witches were grimly depressed and in dire need of cheering up?

>> No.22306757

>>22306732
I can just see the headlines sir, "Congressional Medal of Honor Winner arrested by British Civil authority's for trying to get Ice-cream for young Witches."

>> No.22306764

[x] HE HAS SLIGHTED OUR HONOR
[x] DUEL

Maloney has no respect for our actions! And he has the audacity to openly challenge, nay, arrest us on unfathomable grounds! His claims are false, and we shall have satisfaction!

>> No.22306766

>>22306757
AHAAH THIS!!

>> No.22306773

>>22306757
Oh god, the publicity from this would be absolutely hilarious. Might even sink a career, you don't think?

>> No.22306774

>>22306732
"...Got anything you need fixed on the ship?"

>> No.22306775

>>22306732
Enjoy the press you'll get turning a MoH recipient over to the ENGLISH of all people...for trying to get little girls some ice cream. Also this guy's a cuntwaffle

>> No.22306780

>>22306732
Because we are a goddamn Medal of Honor awardee. If he turns us over, he's selling out a war hero who is VERY popular back home AND with the press.

Needless to say, his career will not be a very happy one after that.

>> No.22306781

>>22306732
Well we were trying to get icecream for the children fighting and winning the war for us, you know let them be kids for a few seconds.

>> No.22306794

>>22306757
>>22306757
This... so much this

>> No.22306795

>>22306757
BRILLIANT

>> No.22306806

>>22306774
I'd say to keep that one in our back pocket for now.

>> No.22306808

>>22306732
The media? They're still around as I recall.

>> No.22306809

>>22306728
I don't think Mio sent him. Rather it's something he's doing on his own. If anything she'd send another witch to do the retrieving.

>"Because I was just getting ice cream to cheer up some depressed witches and that guy's ideas would get more soldiers killed?"

I know it's not great, but it's better than some of the other votes.

>> No.22306815

I dunno guys, I'd much rather try to think up a carrot than a stick.

Though that's an excellent stick.

>> No.22306817

>>22306732
pic related?

Alternatively just let Robin wreck shit until the situation improves. She's good at that

>> No.22306818

>>22306757
this

>> No.22306833

>>22306815
We need both.

"And I hear there's a party on the base I might just be able to get you invited to~"

>> No.22306835

>>22306757
Do it. The last XO who tried to pull shit like this had the "Hero" card pulled on him, and now we have a much MUCH better version of that Hero card.

>> No.22306838

>>22306757
That'll do, pig. That'll do.

>> No.22306839

>Implying anything we say matters when Robin is just going to light this chucklefuck on fire in the next update.

>> No.22306842

>>22306728
Not like we didn't deserve it.
What, you can only dish the trolling out, and you can't take it?

>>22306732
Because, besides creating a very bad precedent for any US Sailor going ashore anywhere and the Big Wing idea doesn't work at all, the amount of press and PAPERWORK when news of a Medal of Honor recipient just trying to get ice cream for little girls is arrested gets out will rival the peak of Mount Everest.

>> No.22306859

>>22306732
Maloney may be suprised to know that, while he has friends in the admiralty, I am FAR more popular with the press.

and since i was carrying out this mission with and on behalf of two young girls who just wanted some ice cream, and given that I am a MoH recipient, the bad press from the media getting word might prove....problematic?

>> No.22306861

>>22306757
beautiful.

>> No.22306862

>>22306842

>> No.22306865

>>22306842
Lets not forget because the British dudes a fag.

>> No.22306866

>>22306732
Point to little sisters. "Look at these faces. Just look at them. All they wanted was some ice cream."

>> No.22306870

>>22306833
Now we're cooking with CHARCOAL.

>> No.22306876

>>22306732

We challenge the motherfucker to a duel. We are most assuredly NOT a shitbird, and he's insulting our family honor by giving Robin denigrating looks. Swords at dawn, you upper-class English fuck-face.

>> No.22306880

>>22306732

... didn't we do some sort of crazy flying to protect this ship from Alium torpedoes in a past episode?

>> No.22306887

>>22306757
In addition: "My girlfriend is a witch, you know. As my little sister, there. Do you REALLY think you can handle the damage that will happen to you and your career when they find out what you've done?"

>> No.22306893

>>22306880
oh yeah we did didn't we?

>> No.22306904

>>22306876
Pistola. We can fuck with pistols WITH OUR MIND

>> No.22306906

>>22306833
This seems workable.

>> No.22306908

>>22306880
Very good point

>> No.22306910

>>22306887
we might have more luck referencing "people he couldn't refuse", which in Mack's case is a nice French girl.

>> No.22306911

>>22306887
>Girlfriends a witch

need to keep this shit on the down low

>> No.22306921

>>22306732
this >>22306757
and this >>22306833

>> No.22306932

>>22306887
Dont say the "g" word, shit could happen
>>22306732
Hasn't he insulted Robin twice now? we must remember this for later.

>> No.22306933

>>22306887
I'd really prefer not to bring Minna into this. It would be awful if she got in trouble because of us.

>> No.22306941

>>22306887
Saying this is a horrid idea.

I don't even mean 'fun' horrible, just ordinary 'We and those we are about are all going to get killed by inches' horrible.

>> No.22306947

>>22306911
Why? Not like the entire fucking base doesn't know that by now.

>> No.22306964

>>22306947
Maloney doesn't.

>> No.22306966

>>22306947
Actually, probably not.

Or at the very least, they don't 'officially' know.

>> No.22306970

>>22306947
knowing that it's true and acknowledging it are two very different things

>> No.22306978

>>22306947
But Maloney doesn't. He's exactly the sort of fucker who would punish her to get to us. Minna stays out of this.

>> No.22306980

>>22306941
>horrid idea

So is dueling but aren't horrid ideas the norms here. It doesn't help some people read it just to be stupid.

>> No.22306985

>>22306880

samefag here:

"Revolutionary War, War of 1812, Coffee is better than Tea, this friendly little witch was crying and ice cream is the booze of women, and I fly a Widow.

Sir."

>> No.22306991

>>22306964
Actually, he probably does. I mean, why else would Minna be covering for Young like she does?

>> No.22306998

>>22306980
Dueling is 'fun' horrible. The G word is the 'Honestly truly bad' horrible

>> No.22307007

>>22306964
>>22306966
>>22306970
>>22306978
Fair enough.

>> No.22307011

>>22306985
The English and Canadians, bastards, burnt Washington, DC, to the ground during the War of 1812. But then an Act of God caused a tornado and raped their ships sitting in the harbor.

>> No.22307015

"Because I've..." you pause. Just THINKING about the medal still makes you queasy in the pit of your stomach, like you've done something genuinely horrible and gotten away with it, but you don't want to lose your wings, freedom, anal virginity, etc. "I've been awarded the Medal of Honor, Chief Boatswain Master of Deck...ings, and the media would be HELLA upset by me being arrested in front of kawaii squa- I mean, little girl witches. SIR!" You try to salute and miss your forehead completely.

Drunken concussions are a HELL of a drug.

"Medal of Honor..." Mack says thoughtfully. He digs in his pocket, and produces a Medal of Honor. "Does it look like this?"

You look at Macks MOH, and then, very, very slowly, you look up at him.

"yes," you say in a small voice - then snap your fingers. "But I'm a media darling and they've been stalking me with cameras and I'll be SURE to let them know who threw me to the fagwolves, you - you - you DOUBLE MARINE!"

Mack nods. "Annoying, isn't it? They follow you everywhere, 'oh Mr. War Hero with the dashing eyepatch and the gruff demeanor, why are you so humble?"

"Bullshit!" you cry, thrusting a finger at him. "Bullshit!"

He shrugs. "Ask anybody."

You turn to a nearby midshipman, then pause. "No. No. Unbiased audience." You whirl on one of the Marines, still coated in melting ice-cream, who escorted you to the deck. "Is he hip?"

"He..." the Marine frowns fiercely. "Kind of... beat a Martian marine to death... with a helmet."

You glance at the other Marine.

"He did," he confirms.

"Well, fuck," you conclude.

>> No.22307018

>>22306991
Maybe he just assumes she doesn't like him just like everyone else?

>> No.22307025

>>22306980
Bringing up that we're a MOH winner, we just saved his ship, we we're only trying to get some ice cream, and that Maloney is an asshole are good ideas.

>> No.22307026

>>22306991
She's been covering for Young?

>> No.22307029

>>22307011
>Canadians
canadians are no longer as bad, because they helped us fight off the aliums that tried to beat their high-score

>> No.22307032

>>22306985
>Coffee is better than Tea

Son, you just stepped over the line.

>> No.22307049

>>22307029
Fuck yeah Canadians. We bro-tier with Canada now.

>> No.22307051

I agree with leaving Minna out of this.

>> No.22307057

>>22306991
He might not. I'm personally not willing to risk it.

>> No.22307058

>>22307015
Drunken concussion? The last thing I remember is UNTZ UNTZ UNTZ

>> No.22307068

>>22307015
>"Kind of... beat a Martian marine to death... with a helmet."
That's so cool...

>> No.22307069

>>22307058
You missed a thread then

>> No.22307070

>>22307015

>> No.22307074

>>22306998
>'fun' horrible

Only people who enjoy seeing stupid/bad things happening at the expense of progress. Please, go back to /b/.

>>22307015
Navymen aren't best known for being arrogant jackasses

>>22307058
likely because you were suffering from a drunken concussion of your own.

>> No.22307089

Oh hey, when'd this start happening again? Last time I looked, we'd just made a light switch rave in the middle of a strategic meeting.

>> No.22307100

>>22307089
last week or so

>> No.22307105

>>22307089
Been about a week or so.

>> No.22307109

>>22307089
a week ago

>> No.22307110

>>22307015
OK, we got the MOH thing, now we move onto the "I saved your ass" thing and that "I just wanted to give my little sister some icecream" thing and the "Maloney is a know asshole" thing.

>> No.22307129

>>22307015
Well, that didn't work out.

This is why I wanted the carrot.

>> No.22307130

>>22307110
Agreed, though PF didn't give us a choice.

>> No.22307136

>>22307015
>Medal of Honor
>"He..." the Marine frowns fiercely. "Kind of... beat a Martian marine to death... with a helmet."

...well shit. When the fuck did this guy stop being a regular Navy faggot?

>> No.22307147

>>22307015
Shit, that's pretty metal.

I'd give a respect fist if he'd accept it.

>> No.22307159

>>22307015
"seriously, you have got to tell me that story at some point"

>> No.22307160

>>22307015

Ghostrider Mouth, anon says again


"Revolutionary War, War of 1812, Coffee is better than Tea, this friendly little witch was crying and ice cream is the booze of women, and I fly a Widow.

You magnificent son of a bitch, Sir."

>> No.22307182

>>22307136
Read Prune Barge Shuffle and find out more about him. For one there's a story behind his missing eye that's pretty badass.

>> No.22307186

>>22307015
save
>>22306774
for when nothing else works

>> No.22307195

>>22307130
We can still bring them up. There's also the "I can get you invited to a rocking party" thing too.

>> No.22307201

There is one last Kielbasa up your lederhosen. "My girlfirend..." you intone, "is a Witch. If you think you'll have political problems with Lord ButtMunch Von Twinkletoes there, wait till SHE gets in the act. Women, scorned, et cetera, yadda yadda, BOOM!" you demonstrate explosively.

Mack just reaches for his wallet, and flips it open to a small picture. You squint at it.

"You're married to a siamese twi-" you shake your head. "Who is that?"

"My girlfriend."

"So?"

Mack just snaps his wallet shut. "Her name is George Lemare."

"Oh!" Robin says. "She's a witch! I love the way she does her hair," she says, twirling her own pigtails. "One of my favor... ite... uh."

You slowly turn to look at Maloney, who is looking as smug as a pig in a pile of shit higher then the North Tower. Darkness closes in on you, and your booze-awareness dissipates, letting the cruel chill of English spring bite your flesh.

Your gambits have failed, and your luck has run out. Authority has found you, and is about to climb up your ass with a roto-tiller.

"So," Maloney says. "Will you turn him over?"

Mack sighs, turns to the English officer, and leans on his podium wearily. He adjusts his cap, straightens up, and prepares to announce your death sentence.

>your reaction

>> No.22307212

>>22307089
oh fuck there's two new threads in the archives
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=strike%20witches

>> No.22307216

>>22307160
I'll side with you.

>> No.22307218 [SPOILER] 

>>22307015
There is only one thing we can do. Try to upstage him infront of our LEETLE SISSTAH witches

>> No.22307243

>>22307218
YER LATE.

>> No.22307245

>>22307201
>"My girlfirend..." you intone, "is a Witch. If you think you'll have political problems with Lord ButtMunch Von Twinkletoes there, wait till SHE gets in the act. Women, scorned, et cetera, yadda yadda, BOOM!" you demonstrate explosively.

FUCK YOU PLANEFAG

>> No.22307248

Well.... this is going badly....

or it's normal for /tg/.

>Attempt to highlight trying to help cute witches and Malloney being an tactically retarded ass.

inb4 anon votes for something even more retarded.

>> No.22307250

>>22307201
>But what if my fist went around?

Oh no wait.

Uh...
>Find it in your heart?

>> No.22307252

>>22307201
Gentleman, Witch, Sister. It has been a privilege.

>> No.22307254

>>22307201
>Drunk
>first few things that come to mind are the first things that come out of our mouth.
Well played, sir.

>> No.22307257

>>22307201
>Going with the option that quite a few people did not want
It's like you never left!

>> No.22307264

>>22307201
I believe you mean "Georgette".

>reaction

"I save your ship, and this is how you repay me?!"

>> No.22307276

>>22307257
Hopefully it'll get the retards reading this to actually get their brains from home.

>> No.22307278

>>22307201

WE WAIT. We wait, and then tell Maloney that he's trying to help the ENGLISH, when they're still dicking over the Irish? The Hell is his Irish Pride?

>> No.22307279 [SPOILER] 

>>22307243
As if anyone cares about that faggot. I mean come on, who reads subwitches anyways?

>> No.22307286

>>22307201
And we brought up these stupid shit excuses instead of the fact that it would set a bad precedent for Navy sailors at foreign ports?

Stop digging the hole deeper and give some actually relevant reasons.

>> No.22307295

Is it strange that I miss Fronk and his logical ways?

>> No.22307301

>>22307286
This.

>> No.22307308

>>22307295
No

>> No.22307311

>>22307286
drunk, planefag
pick one

>> No.22307314

>>22307286
We're too drunk to come up with anything.

Fuck it, let's just jump over the side and swim for it.

>> No.22307326

>>22307264
This please

>> No.22307335

As good as it would be to not get arrested, part of me really wants to see how the others react to us being in prison.

>> No.22307336

>>22307201
>got anything on your ship you need fixed?

>> No.22307340

>>22307295
not exactly; even with the stupid outbreak in the last SW89 session, it's not as bad as this.

And with how excessively hijink heavy this has been, it's attracted a good number of exceptionally retarded people.

>> No.22307349

>>22307295
To be fair, Young is drunk as all hell right now.

>> No.22307350

>>22307201
"I just... I just wanted to get icecream. For my little sisters. They were sad and hugs weren't enough and there's no icecream on the island and you have an icecream MACHINE."

>> No.22307355

>>22307340
We had an outbreak of stupid?

I missed that.

>> No.22307368

>>22307350
Might as well this.

>> No.22307373

>>22307349
And concussed.
Thats always fun.

>> No.22307375

>>22307355
It's ongoing

>> No.22307399

>>22307355
It's like a boomerang, you have it briefly, then it goes away, only to come back and hit you upside the head

>> No.22307401

>>22307375
It's been "ongoing" from day one.
We PIOLIT

>> No.22307404

>>22307355
Yep, waifufagging, tin toil hat conspiracy theories, and near the end, some classic angling for hijinks.

And it should be in the archives.

>> No.22307421

>>22307201
"You can't arrest me if I'm dead!" dive mother fucker, dive!

>> No.22307428

Young is going to have some alarming PTSD when the war is over.

>> No.22307433

>>22307355
By the way I was referring to sw89, not this.

This is more akin to long term retardation.

>> No.22307439

>>22307295

Speaking of '89.

It's due tomorrow, isn't it? Or when is it?

>> No.22307441

>>22307404
No, I was in the thread. I just didn't see "Stupid"

Maybe it didn't seem stupid because I SWQ too much.

>> No.22307448

aw shit he pulled the Georgette card

>> No.22307476

>>22307433

Really?

Was it the Katya/Ice thingie or letting a hyper little sister stay overnight?

>> No.22307493

There is only one thing left to do - die with dignity. You pull together some stalwart last phrases for your girls, thins like "Mentlegen, Pitchers, Witchers, it has been a privilege," and, with these noble phrases on your tongue, stand up straight as possible and prepare to meet your doom.

"No." Mack says.

All assembled do a double take (or quadruple, in your case.)

"Pardon?" Maloney says.

Mack holds up a hand, and coughs a few times into his fist to clear his throat, then takes a deep breath, stands up straight, and enunciates.

"NO," he says, much louder.

".... what?" Maloney says, looking utterly baffled.

"I said NO," Mack snarls. "You want him, you go through proper channels. You certainly don't come storming onto MY deck, with armed men, without permission - after taking your sweet god-damned time with our docking paperwork and dumping an entire munitions dump of ammo and high-explosive shells so close to my dock that the FIRST Martian air-raid that visits will blow the superstructure clean off my ship's hull!" Mack's face isn't reddening with anger - in fact, it's getting pale, and his voice is only getting steadier as energy flows into his exhausted frame. "And you ESPECIALLY don't mouth off to ladies, or Witches, on my ship, especially when I'm DATING one!"

Maloney turns an interesting shade of orange and starts breathing funnily. "You have a representative of the English civil authority AND the English military demanding the immediate extradition of a WANTED CRIMINAL! THIS WILL NOT STAND, MAN!"

"It won't," Mack says. "We're going to try him right here, on the deck."

>> No.22307513

>>22307493

Oh fuck.

>> No.22307516

>>22307493
YARR MATEY WE BE WALKIN THE PLANK

>> No.22307523

>>22307493
>"It won't," Mack says. "We're going to try him right here, on the deck."

Fuck, just how much did we have to drink?

>> No.22307531

Win or lose, we should have a drink with Mack once quieter times come by.

>> No.22307536

>>22307493
Oh shit.

>> No.22307538

>>22307523
Too much to be sober, not enough to have no feels.

>> No.22307539

>>22307493
FOR THE CRIMES OF TRYING TO STEAL ICE CREAM FOR THESE LITTLE WITCHES! I SHALL SWAB THE DECK!

>> No.22307540

>>22307493
"Shall i go ahead and walk the plank, sir?"

>> No.22307545

>>22307439
tuesday, likely around 5pm central.

>>22307441
Very well likely as virtually anything pales compared to SWQ as of late, especially the last few pre-hiatus threads.

>>22307476
the hijinks relate to letting said little sister make things worse and the waifufagging was mainly on Katya's side; most of the Ice votes were more for having the most responsible witch making a nice impression.

>>22307523
A decent bit but Young didn't seem that drunk earlier. The anon voting on the other hand? likely 3-6 irish pubs' worth.

>> No.22307547

>>22307493
I hope we brought lube, because we're fucked

>> No.22307549

>>22307493
I request a trial by combat?

>> No.22307552

>>22307493
So after this we ask Mack if there really is anything on his ship he needs fixed.

>> No.22307565

>>22307493
>"We're going to try him right here, on the deck."
I don't know how to feel about this.

>> No.22307575

>>22307493
>"We're going to try him right here, on the deck."

Shit.

>> No.22307576

>>22307552
No, that's dumb.

>> No.22307578

>>22307545
Do the laws of the universe allow Irish pubs to run out of alcohol?

>> No.22307586

>>22307493
This is going to be hilarious.

>> No.22307593

Maloney blinks. "And just where do you get the aut-"

"He's illegally boarded my vessel and attempted to steal provisions," Mack says smoothly. "Therefore he's a pirate, and must be tried as one. You don't extradite anybody until your own nation has finished trying them for crimes in THEIR jurisdiction, don't you know?"

Maloney fumes. "Fine. Get on with it."

"What the hell is going on?" somebody says from the top of the gangplank. You turn to see two Minna's standing at the top, looking quite sober, and very perplexed.

>Play it cool, Minna
>MINNA HALP PLZ
>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

>> No.22307595

>>22307578
>Irish
There's your answer right there

>> No.22307597

>>22307493

this is going to get gay, isn't it?

>> No.22307598

>>22307493
did they still do the keelhauling thing during this time? because I bet were gonna get keelhauled

>> No.22307604

>>22307578

Yes, but only on the day after Saint Paddies day.

>> No.22307607

>>22307593

>Play it cool, Minna

>> No.22307609

>>22307593
"HI MINNA!"

>> No.22307611

>>22307593
>>Play it cool, Minna
"Oh nothing, but can you add piracy to my file? and get me a parrot"

>> No.22307612

>>22307493
it never ends

>> No.22307616

>>22307593
>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY
Little sisters first.

>> No.22307622

>>22307593
Play it cool, Minna

>> No.22307623

>>22307593
We be walking da plank mam.

>> No.22307624

>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY
"Your girls shouldn't be here for this. I'll set a bad example."

>> No.22307625

>>22307593
oh god this >>22307611

>> No.22307626

>>22307578

Then they run the tap from the urinal.

Which at that point is almost pure alcohol.

>> No.22307627

>>22307593
>>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY
fly, my witches!

>> No.22307628

>>22307593
>Play it cool, Minna

And if things start looking bad

>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

>> No.22307630

>>22307593
>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

SAVE THE LITTLE SISTERS

>> No.22307635

>>22307593
YAR, MINNA, YE NEED TO BE GETTIN THESE KAWAII SCALLYWAGS TO SAFETY.

>> No.22307636

>>22307593
"Stay cool, babe. I'm a pirate now."

>> No.22307641

>>22307593
>>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

>> No.22307645

>>22307593
>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

>> No.22307654

>>22307593
Okay, play it coo, Minna.

>> No.22307662

>>22307593
"Minna I've finally gone pirate."
>Play it cool, Minna
While everyones distracted with this trial, Robin steals more Icecream.

>> No.22307664

>>22307593
>Play it cool, Minna
>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY

OH THOR'S HAMMER! The California may just be sunk this night.

>> No.22307673

>GET THE KAWAII SQUAD TO SAFETY
>Play it cool, Minna

and then

>pray
>brace thy anus

>> No.22307674

>>22307593
Oh god, this is gonna hurt.

Play it cool, Minna

>> No.22307676

>>22307611
This

>> No.22307681

>>22307593
"Apparently i'm a pirate. D'you think Mio has a spare eyepatch? Also I need one of those hats."

>> No.22307690

>>22307493
>mfw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfAyEWr0004

>> No.22307695

>>22307593
>Play it cool, Minna

"Nothing much, about to be court martialed for piracy. Feeling better?"

>> No.22307708

>>22307598
KEELHAUL THAT FILTHY LANDLUBBER.
SEND HIM DOWN TO THE DEPTHS BELOW.
MAKE THAT BASTARD WALK THE PLANK WITH A BOTTLE OF RUM AND A YO HO HO!

>> No.22307726

>>22307611
DO EEEET

>> No.22307770

If we survive this we need to get.

>Eyepatch
>Cutlass to one up Sean
>Refer to Sean as the "Flying Irishman"

A hat wouldn't be too bad...

A really big one

>> No.22307792

>>22307593

Crazy Ivan to the tune of this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGyPuey-1Jw

>> No.22307800

"Minna, get these kids out of here," you say, strained. "They shouldn't get caught up in this."

"I'm afraid they have to, Miss," Mack says seriously. "They're witnesses for the trial, now."

Minna scans the deck, and her eyes narrow at Maloney. You can almost see the gears in her fine Teutonic mind spinning and smoking as she puts together a conclusion at high speed.

"I see," she says. "But the Uniform code of military justice allows for legal representation and counsel, doesn't it? In fact, it requires it!"

Mack (pretends) to think, looking very thoughtful, and then nods. "Indeed."

"Then I shall serve for all parties," Minna says brightly. "Permission to come aboard?"

"Granted," Mack says, and Minna steps onto the deck. Maloney's face has become impassive, but his eyes glitter with ill-concealed hatred for Minna's sudden intrusion.

"Right. So. We're convening here to try... drunkface here for piracy," Mack says. "Alright, for the first piece of testimony, I call...you!" Mack says, thrusting his finger at Yoshika, who hops back with a reflexive little 'eep!, covering her mouth with her hands.

' "She seems the most trustworthy. And since she likely only speaks English as a second language, I will interrogate her in her native Japanese, so her testimony is accurate. No problems, I assume, 'Air Marshal'?"

Maloney, who's only the Air Marshall's aide and knows Mack knows it, grinds his teeth. "None. At. All," he bites out with staccato hate. "AS LONG as as Ms. Miyafuji does her duty and answers the questions asked TRUTHFULLY," he snarls at Yoshika, who tries to retreat behind your legs, looking very, very scared. She risks a glance at Minna, who nods at her curtly.

"O-okay," Yoshika says, stepping before Mack, looking like an execution victim on the block. "I I-ll answer your questions."

>> No.22307801

Don't forget, people. He has to be CONVICTED of piracy first.

It's admittedly an almost sure thing at this point, but formalities are formalities.

>> No.22307802

>>22307770
"If", my friend. "If"

>> No.22307828

>>22307690
>>22307690

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=023XHmZieqc

SUPERIOR

>> No.22307834

>>22307800
>Minna as our lawyer

everythingwentbetterthanexpected.jpg

>> No.22307844

>>22307800
Give the girl a smile

Bit of a confidence boost

>> No.22307845

>>22307800
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZrQialji38

>> No.22307846

>>22307800

She is having wayy too much fun with this.

>> No.22307857

>>22307802
If is good.

>> No.22307860

>>22307800
>speaking in moon

He's preparing a bounce of historic proportions.

>> No.22307871

>>22307801
A good number of our flights are more like controlled descents but they still call us a pilot. I think we can take some leeway on the pirate title too.

>> No.22307876

>>22307800
Oh god.

>> No.22307881

>Not Drunken Whaler

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVlVyi9rKDo

>> No.22307895

>>22307800
inb4 "Gomenasai, my name is Mack-sama"

>> No.22307907

>>22307895
Mack was an attache in Japan, he knows real Japanese

>> No.22307912

>>22307844
A smile? When she gets us off this ship she'll be getting a whole lot more than that.

>> No.22307928

>>22307912
I'm talking, Yoshika

>> No.22307934

>>22307912
You're not suggesting we go all Descartes on Miyafuji are you?

>> No.22307941

>>22307907
Which would make it even funnier

>> No.22307950

>>22307934
She has enough problems as it is, teaching her philosophy is something we should do later.

>> No.22307961

>>22307934

No. Robin.

>> No.22307969

>her face when

>> No.22307988

>>22307934
beauty.

>> No.22308004

>>22307800

>> No.22308005

>>22307934
>>22307961
>>22307988
I was talking about Minna, you perverts. Can you not see the picture?

>> No.22308031

"Excellent," Mack says, and switches to Japanese. Soon he's engaged in the squeak-squeak dit-dah-dit-dit-dah pitch-code of the Japanese language. Almost immediately after she starts speaking, Yoshika's terrified visage relaxes, and she just looks apprehensive, but far, far calmer. Apparently having somebody to squealphrase with makes all the difference.

Mack asks Yoshika something and she objects strenuously. Mack snorts and paces a few steps away, still talking. To your surprise, a giggle manages to choke out between Yoshika's sniffles. Mack kneels to address Yoshika near her eye level, looking quite serious. He asks her one last, very grave-sounding squeal query.

Yoshika really tears up, crying. Mack presses his query, and eventually, she answers.

The XO of the California stands up, his face graven of ash. He looks at Robin. "Who are you?"

"HIS SISTER!" she replies proudly, crossing her arms and tossing her hair in a "SO THERE" gesture.

"Unsuitable witness, then," Mack says. He looks you dead in the eye. "Airman... after listening to Yoshika's testimony, I find you guilty of piracy."

Behind him, Maloney's face lights up with joy, and a horrible sinking feeling enters your stomach. With even twelve hours in the California's brig, Maloney will have time to really get gears in motion before you can get back on Witch-controlled soil.

Mack looks at his watch. "I sentence you to time served."

>Maloney's Face When

>> No.22308050

>>22308031
Mack is best pilot for battleship

>> No.22308052

>>22307800
>ofw

>> No.22308062

>>22308031
what?

>> No.22308071

>>22308031

Maloney is moe? Oh planefag.
YOU.

>> No.22308076 [DELETED] 

>>22308050
second

>> No.22308080

>>22308062

BELIEVE IN PLANEFAG.

>> No.22308081

>>22308062
I might be wrong, but I do believe Mack just trolled Maloney even harder.

>> No.22308082

>>22308031
>ofw

>> No.22308083

>>22308031
>do this to Maloney

>> No.22308087

>>22308031
I sense the need to de-ass this area ASAP

>> No.22308089

>>22308071
He does seem kinda tsundere for MC.

>> No.22308092

>>22308031
>WE PIRATE NOW
"Minna. Tell Lynette to put a skull and crossbones on the Widow, will you?

>> No.22308097

>>22308071
And now we know why he's so bitter.
He wanted to be a little magical pantsless girl all along.

>> No.22308100

BROFIST THE GUY

and probably fail at it

>> No.22308109

>>22307800
uh,, ,the ucmj doesn't exist for another 7 years, its a 1950 thing man, thats sort of ahistorical, he should be using the Navy Regulations which have plans JUST FOR THIS SORT OF THING. otherwise yeah, this entire thread,
>my sides are underway on nuclear power.

>> No.22308114

>>22308031
Mack is going to become Vice-President under us.
>mfw, its the food in the picture.

>> No.22308116

>>22308031
>time served

For anyone who doesn't legalese, the time spent in "trial" was our sentence. We're off scot-free.

>> No.22308128

>>22308109

Who gives a shit, RetaRd.

>> No.22308134

>>22308031
Get owned

>> No.22308140

>>22308116
oh, NICE

>> No.22308145

>>22308116

5 minutes making ice cream. :3

>> No.22308159

>>22308116
I wonder if Young is sober enough to get this.

>> No.22308168

>>22308159
Probably not

>> No.22308173

>>22308159
We should just jump overboard just in case. It has never failed us before.

>> No.22308177

"WELL," Maloney says, quite miffed. "Now that you've had your goddamn fun, and your rear end is properly covered from a paperwork standpoint, are you going to ex-tra-dite-" he enunciates every syllable -"this crook to me?"

Maloney tilts his head thoughtfully, and then, with slow deliberation, swivels on his heel to Minna.

And that's when Maloney realizes he's been played like a fiddle.

"NO!" he snarls. "NO!"

"Actually, the 501st Joint Wing has some charges we'd like to bring him up on," Minna says sweetly. "Won't you extradite him to US, first?"

The last remnants of the cultured and urbane social-climbing English Officer slip from Maloney's face in a heartbeat. In his savage, utterly mad face you see that it's personal for him. You can do anything to a career officer, a social climber - insult them, steal from them, wound their pride - but the thing you can never, ever do is make them look bad in front of high society and their superiors.

And you've humiliated this man in front of dozens of TV cameras and big-shot war correspondents.

Thrice.

"SEIZE THAT SON OF A BITCH!" Maloney snarls, and his attack dogs move in.

>wat do

>> No.22308185

>>22308159
Not sure if he would even understand if he was sober.

>> No.22308189

>>22308177
What do, you ask?

KICK ASS!

>> No.22308195

>>22308177
'HELP HELP I'M BEING REPRESSED!"

>> No.22308202

>>22308177
Jump overboard

>> No.22308205

>>22308177
KRAZY IVAN

>> No.22308209

>>22308177
"Help, help. I have a Medal of Honor and I'm being assaulted my Maloney, which is against several military regulations. Please save me, somebody."

>> No.22308214

>>22308177
Hide behind Marines and/or Minna. We're drunk.

>> No.22308218

>>22308109

I know.

>> No.22308219

>>22308177

absolutely nothing.
He's going to try to forcibly take an american serviceman on an american warship, and bring us up on british civil charges during a time of war? Good fucking luck.

>> No.22308224

>>22308177

"Mack, you think your Marines could take these faggot Brits? Maloney and I have a fist fight to take care of."

>> No.22308225

>>22308195
Shout this, and go hide behind the sailors and marines.

>> No.22308226

>>22308177
EJECT EJECT EJECT

Off the board we go.

>> No.22308227

>>22308177
"Hey, did you Limies ask permission to come aboard?"

>> No.22308228

>>22308177
"AVAST YE LANDLUBBERS!"

SUMMON THE HELLCOW

>> No.22308229

>>22308177
COME SEE THE VIOLENCE INHERENT IN THE SYSTEM.

>> No.22308234

>>22308177

>> No.22308240

>>22308195

This

>> No.22308241

>>22308219
Actually, on second thought...

This?

I like this.

>> No.22308243

>>22308177

Insult Maloney.

"FUCK YOU BIG WING SUCKS YOU'RE THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THE DEATHS OF BRAVE PILOTS"

>> No.22308244

>>22308177
OVER THE SIDE!

>> No.22308249

>>22308177
HEY, ARE THOSE CAMERAS STILL RUNNING?

BECAUSE I'M PRETTY SURE THE KIDNAPPING OF AN AMERICAN PILOT BY THE BRITS WILL BE PURE GOLD

>> No.22308254

>>22308177
"LOVELY EVENING FOR A SWIM WOT WOT?"

>> No.22308256

>>22308195
>>22308229
Yeah, got to.

>> No.22308263

>>22308243
Things about to get stupid no matter what, so why not this? It needs to be said?

>> No.22308265

>>22308177
>queue marines holding off the limeys while we battle Maloney with Fisticuffs

>> No.22308267

>>22308177
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNwbkPtDUU0
>run like fuck

>> No.22308271

>>22308177
HERE WE GO

>> No.22308273

>>22308229
This. changing to this

>> No.22308278

>>22308177
Well this seems to be one hell of a mistake on his part. No need to fight, he does not have jurisdiction here and is actively ignoring that fact. I pretty sure that's criminal

>> No.22308279

>>22308241
On the other hand, if we pull Minna overboard with us we'll get to see through her shirt.

>> No.22308283

>>22308195
>>22308229
Yes, these

>> No.22308284

>>22308243
THIS! WE SNAP ON HIS BITCH ASS!

>> No.22308292

>>22308177
Don't do a fucking thing, and let the Marines have fun wrestling with the Limeys.

>> No.22308307

>>22308279
Or you know we could be smart, not do anything and then get rewarded later by her screwing our brains out for not being a complete moron

>> No.22308318

>>22308177
>a Englishman pulling this shit on an American warship
>every marines face on that ship

>> No.22308322

>>22308279
...but we've already seen her naked. Today even.

And if we DON'T do that, we're likely to see her naked again VERY soon afterwards.

>> No.22308324

>>22308219
Seconding this.

The final nail in his coffin will be fucking himself over.

>> No.22308329

>>22308307
>>22308322

True. Consider the suggestion withdrawn.

>> No.22308332

>>22308307
You're asking this of /tg/, thus it's rather likely to be "failure is the only option"

>> No.22308342

>>22308177
Turn to the marines "The Redcoats are coming"

>> No.22308355

>>22308332
But if you look, there's actually a surprising amount of restraint being shown.

>> No.22308367

>>22308342
...This is really tempting.

>> No.22308377

>>22308355
Even /tg/ knows we're walking on knives today. Once we're on the island again, shenanigans tiem.

>> No.22308380

>>22308355
Yeah it's surprising the sudden upturn of COMMON SENSE.

>> No.22308384

>>22308177
Finnally, we've stripped him of his mask, BEHOLD the TRUE FACE of Britain!

>> No.22308385

SO MANY OPTIONS

>>22308342
but I like this one best

>> No.22308387

>>22308342
This!, start running in circles out of reach yelling "The british are coming! the british are coming, by sea! by sea!"

>> No.22308390

>>22308177
"awake! Awake! The British are coming! The British are coming!"

>> No.22308391

>>22308219
Supporting this.

>> No.22308392

>>22308355
don't kid yourself we have dumb asses wanting to jump overboard into English territory for no goddamn reason.

>> No.22308398

>>22308342

This absolutely. Remind them about the raid on the tavern in England during the Revolution, lead by John Paul Jones on the Ranger. "Care to relive a bit of history, gentlemen?

>> No.22308407

>>22308392
But it's different than EVERYONE voting for that, which is normally what happens.

>> No.22308408

>>22308398
>John Paul Jones
best commander

>> No.22308430

>>22308408

THE FATHER OF THE AMERICAN NAVY.

"Sir, I have not yet begun to fight!"

>> No.22308472

>>22308342
Fuck it, go for this.

>> No.22308478

>>22308408
John Paul Jones was an utter badass.

>> No.22308488

>>22308384
The english aren't all bad, "Little" sister No3, Lynette is descended from the english.

>> No.22308501

>>22308488
Ian's English too.

>> No.22308506

>>22308488

>> No.22308509

>>22308488
>Billy Bishop's kid
>English

You best chuck yourself 'fore you canuck yourself, ye hoser.

>> No.22308512

>>22308488
>mfw

Bitch, she's Canadian. Don't go sullying her name again if you know what's good for you.

>> No.22308519

>>22308488
>>22308501
And think, just below the surface they are the same.

>> No.22308529

You do the only thing you can think of.

"HELLCOW HELLCOW HELLCOW I SUMMON THEE!" you scream, and dive forward, trying to pancake the girls to the deck.

That doesn't work so well. You're just reaching for Robin when a blast of air knocks you flat on your ass. Yoshika's hands are held before her and a massive, glowing blow semi-circular shield has sprung into the air and a gigantic circle of blue light is flowing over the deck beneath you as her magic, raw and unfocused and mighty, flows out of her.

"STAY AWAY FROM HIM!" she's screaming, and that's about when Robin flattens YOU to the deck, flinging herself over you.

The RAF security men are just raising their sub-machine guns and skittering sideways to move around Yoshika's shield when you hear it.

If there's one thing more alarming then the sound of thirty cigarettes hitting the floor at once in a Navy bar, it's the sound of thirty rifle bolts being thrown home at once.

Oh, and the nice, satisfying KER-CHLACK! of a .30 cal Browning being racked.

Or two.

No, three.

Maloney and his men look up to see about thirty-odd Marines with Springfields, BARs, Thompsons and even three M1919 .30 cal Brownings being trained on them.

"You... dun... goof'd," Mack says calmly. "Especially since you didn't grant those poor Marines shore leave, they're feeling awfully testy right about now. Best drop your guns, gentlemen."

The RAF troopers look back at Maloney.

"DROP THEM!" Mack roars, a horrifying volume booming from his chest.

Better then half-a-dozen Sten guns clatter to the deck.

"If I'd tried to turn him over, those girls would've done the same thing," Mack snaps. "And people would've died. You blithering moron."

>> No.22308530

>>22308384
>Implying that one man represents an entire nation
Sweeping generalisations work both ways

>> No.22308533

>>22308501

Ian is a Scottish name. Granted, KENT is English.

So...
>>22308506

>> No.22308544

>>22308384
Behold indeed.

>> No.22308552

>>22308529

>> No.22308561

>>22308529
our face when

>> No.22308569

>>22308529

>> No.22308573

>>22308529
Minna. These marines. They get Shore leave.

>> No.22308577

>>22308530
Why yes, yes they do.

>> No.22308582

>>22308573
this

>> No.22308585

>>22308529
>Not granting Marines shore leave
>Attempting to take Young in while expecting them to idly stand by or help.

Wow.... he went 200% retard.

>> No.22308588

>>22308529
>dropping stens
>DROPPING
>FUCKING
>STENS

OH SHIT, STAY DOWN

>> No.22308596

>>22308529
Marine Corps to the rescue!

>> No.22308602

>>22308529
Wait, the limeys actually went as far to level their guns and didn't just try to pigpile us?

Ho man. These guys must be Maloney's personal goons, because there's NO WAY the average guys would be THAT EFFING STUPID.

>> No.22308605

>>22308588
oh fuck...

>> No.22308614

>>22308529
>Sten guns
Seriously? Those jamming pieces of shit?

>> No.22308617

>>22308588
The horror.

>> No.22308624

>>22308529
"After this can we make sure these guys get some shore leave I think they earned it."

>> No.22308631

>>22308605
Witches shields are up! we all good!

>> No.22308633

>>22308529
>Better then half-a-dozen Sten guns clatter to the deck.
And everyone on the boat dies horribly.
BAD END

>> No.22308654

>>22308529
Okay. Mack is the new best navy person.

Sorry Pappy, but you lose.

And we should ask for some ice cream before we leave. Because goddammit, Little Sisters need Ice Cream.

If challenged on why we didn't earlier, there's only one real option.

'Pilot'.

>> No.22308657

>>22308614
>Those jamming pieces of shit that go full auto own their own if you drop them, nudge them, or even look at them funny

>> No.22308669

Defeated, dejected, and demoralized, Maloney can only stare at you in utter, baffled disbelief.

"What the hell did you even come to the ship for?" he asks, with the plaintive expression of a man who's resigned to his fate, and now only wishes to know why.

You stagger to your feet, eyes ablaze, and ball your fist up before you, iron determination in your face.

"I'LL NEVER. STOP. LOOKING," you snap.

Maloney stares at you in utter, confused horror.

"That's nice," Mack says, then turns to Maloney. "NOW GET OFF MY FUCKING SHIP!"

"Bu-"

Thirty Marines leer down at Maloney, their faces lustful and flushed as they tighten their stocks to their shoulders and pick out their favorite faglord.

"GO GO GO" Maloney screams, and as one the pack of men flee for the gangplank. They crowd onto the narrow board, slipping and sliding, grabbing at each other to avoid falling over the edge in their mad panic.

Waiting for them on the dock is HellCow.

>> No.22308694

>>22308669

>> No.22308695

>>22308669
>Waiting for them on the dock is HellCow
well shit

>> No.22308699

>>22308669
>I'll never stop looking
I offer you manatee hugs.

>> No.22308701

>>22308669
>I'll never stop looking

>> No.22308709

>>22308669
>hellcow

GONDOR CALLED FOR AID, AND ROHAN ANSWERED

>> No.22308715

>>22308657
So basically, they are overall shit!
>>22308669
HA HA OH FUCK HELLCOW IS HASTUR

>> No.22308723

>>22308669
>Waiting for them on the dock is HellCow.

Oh Fuck yes!

>> No.22308733

>>22308669
Point and laugh, point and laugh!

>> No.22308734

>>22308669
>Waiting for them on the dock is HellCow.

those poor RAF troopers.

I mean Maloney is a total dick, but those guys are bound to his whims even more than us.

Still, this is gonna be good.

>"I'LL NEVER. STOP. LOOKING,"

Ahahahahahahah!

>> No.22308735

>>22308669
>Waiting for them on the dock is HellCow.

>> No.22308756

>Maloney's face if we invite him to the party at the castle

let's face it, he may fucking hate us, but he seriously needs to unwind

>> No.22308766

>>22308734
No, because normal RAFers wouldn't be as stupid to hang around him. These are his personal hangers-on.

They're implicit in his assholery. And they aimed guns at us and in the general direction of our little sisters.

Screw 'em.

>> No.22308772

>>22308669

>> No.22308774

>>22308529
Wait a minute. "Hellcow Hellcow Hellcow I summon thee" - did you just finish Cold Days?

>> No.22308813

>>22308756
are you suggesting we try and make Maloney a bro?

>> No.22308831

>>22308813
no, we reform him and make him OUR minion

>> No.22308837

Hellcow's silibant hiss has barely begun slicing through the air before the screams of the British company have begun. They go racing up the gangplank again, only to meet a phalanx of Marine rifleman and a .30 caliber Browning with fixed bayonets - including the Browning. Caught between Marines and the demonic, Martian robot, they do the only thing they can.

They jump.

"YOU'RE A DEAD MAN PILOT! I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF!" a man is screaming - Maloney, to be sure - as he's fished out of the water by his men, who are clamoring up onto the bank. A few minutes later, you hear their jeeps kicking up gravel as they tear out, with Hellcow loping after in lazy pursuit.

And then Mack starts laughing.

>> No.22308848

>>22308813
No, we can't make him bro.

But maybe if we pry that damn titanium rod out of his ass we can save some other people some trouble.

>> No.22308860

>>22308837
> phalanx of Marine rifleman and a .30 caliber Browning with fixed bayonets - including the Browning.
Chesty Puller would be proud

>> No.22308869

>>22308756
No, he needs to eat a bullet. Nothing we do will ever make him not like us. Only thing I hope is that we'll be there to watch the son of a bitch die.

>> No.22308872

>>22308837
And thus closes a new chapter in the Anglo-american saga.

Can we go to bed and sleep now?

>> No.22308875

>>22308837
Come to think of it.

Did we ever actually figure out who that guy who was trying to kill us was, or who he was working for?

>> No.22308886

>>22308869
so edgy

>> No.22308889

>>22308875
No idea who and Kathy did a really good shooting him so we couldn't find anything out.

>> No.22308894

>>22308875
No. Which Planefag will probably pull out on us at a horrible time.

>> No.22308895

>>22308875
I've asked Planefag that. We discussed it a bit and he said that he wants it kept quiet because it's not resolved yet.

TRUST IN PLANEFAG

>> No.22308901

>>22308875
It was Maloney, or the Soviets.

Maloney: We need to find set his desk on fire.

The Soviets: We need to assassinate their leader.

>> No.22308906

>>22308837
>Browning with bayonet

do they actually make those?

>> No.22308909

>>22308875
Nope.

>>22308837
Time to legally acquire some icecream, drop somewhere and sleep the drunk away.

>> No.22308912

>>22308875
I think we assumed mindwashed by Aliums. But might have been Maloney.

>> No.22308915

>>22308875

I don't think Maloney would go that far.

Well that far THEN now might be a different story

>> No.22308928

>>22308901

Not those SS fuckwits on the boat?

They might be out to kill us for boning their pure teutonic waifu.

>> No.22308936

>>22308837
water cooled brownings or air cooled?

>> No.22308943

>>22308906
You're talking about marines. Give them five minutes some scrap metal and some wire, and they'll make something that works.

>> No.22308956

>>22308928
>Not those SS fuckwits on the boat?
when the fuck did that happen?

>> No.22308961

>>22308936
>1919
It's air cooled

>> No.22308972

>>22308956
Recent PBS chapter

>> No.22308976

>>22308936
see >>22308943

It don't matter

>> No.22308983

>>22308928
>SS fuckwits on the boat?
when did this turn into Black Lagoon?

>> No.22308990

>>22308961
gaaaaaaay

>> No.22308998

>>22308906
this?

>> No.22309001

>>22308837
Now would be the time to ask them for some fucking ice cream.
And to politely ask Minna if the nice Marines can be allowed some shore leave. Even if it's only to Barin, the bath in the castle has to beat out the showers on the ship.

>> No.22309008

>>22308990
Not every marine is John Basilone.

>> No.22309012

>>22308972
PBS Chapter?

>> No.22309034

He collapses onto his podium as the laughter overtakes him, leeching the strength from his legs. Helpless, tears pouring from his eye, he laughs and laughs and laughs.

Finally, he calms down a bit, and manages to look at Minna. "Uniform Code of Military Justice?"

Minna giggles. "Pretty good, huh?"

"Yeah. The services actually agreeing on something-" that sets Mack off again for a few minutes, as he leans on the podium and slaps the side a bit. At long last, he manages to get his composure back. "Son," he says to you, "I'm glad you snuck aboard. I owed that little rat some grief. Especially after what he said about women of the Witching persuasion."

"Aye-aye Chiefswain Boathooker!" you say. "Thank you muchly." You sway a bit, and grab at a railing, missing it a few times before making contact. "I don't have sea-legs but, are ships supposed to rock this much in port?"

Mack squints at you. "Are you that drunk or did those Marines hit you that hard?"

"Yes."

"I can help!"
"I can help!"

Minna and Yoshika reach for you at almost the same time.

>> No.22309037

>>22309012
Prune Barge Shuffle

>> No.22309038

>>22309012
Prune Barge Shuffle

One of the after thread writefag things.

>> No.22309042

>>22308983

Right about here: >>22308177

>> No.22309044

>>22308998

>> No.22309073

>>22309012
Yeah; Prune Barge shuffle, one was posed on I think monday but the all the chapters are on Tofusaur. It hasn't been posted lately due to the ass who keeps on posting that incest chicken 2 stuff.

>> No.22309074

>>22309034
Can helicopters actually do that?

>> No.22309079

>>22309034
invite the marines to the party
ALL OF THEM

>> No.22309086

>>22309012
Prune Barge Shuffle. Where this ship and character came from.

>> No.22309088

>>22309044
Its the internet, everything exists, so yeah, its a navy custom I think if it even exists, since Wiki says only 1 experimental one was made.

>> No.22309089

>>22309034

Tear him.

In Halffff

>> No.22309093

>>22309074
Depends on the Helicopter.

>> No.22309097

>>22309073
It's the same ass who did the first one.

>> No.22309098

>>22309074
I'm going out on a limb and say no.

>> No.22309099

>>22309034
>"Yeah. The services actually agreeing on something-" that sets Mack off again for a few minutes, as he leans on the podium and slaps the side a bit. At long last, he manages to get his composure back. "Son," he says to you, "I'm glad you snuck aboard. I owed that little rat some grief. Especially after what he said about women of the Witching persuasion."

'Glad to be of service. Now, our little sisters deserve some ice cream.'

>> No.22309105

>>22309034
Yoshika, if you know what's good for you you'll let go RIGHT NOW

>> No.22309128

>>22309034
Can the girls have icecream now?

>> No.22309135

isn't there a cossack we need to find?

>> No.22309138

>>22309074
Only for short bursts according to google.

>> No.22309149

>>22308813
This isn't Ogres.

>> No.22309153

>>22309098

Off with your limb, then.

>> No.22309161

>>22309034
D'aaaaaaw.

Sisters before hoes?

>> No.22309169

>>22309135
MC can't keep track of more than three things at once.

>> No.22309189

>>22308889
>No idea who and Kathy did a really good job destroying all the evidence.

Fixed that for you.

>> No.22309208

>>22309135
maybe after we get some ice cream or whatever. Don't you remember how upset Yoshika was about everyone focusing on Sanya?

Hell that scene was likely a "take that" at us for overfocusing on her.

>>22309189
Same thing basically.

>> No.22309211

>>22309161
Pretty sure that's not an option. But a Minna is fine too.

>> No.22309245

>>22309161
Hmm....I think that's a bad idea.

>> No.22309252

Heys remember that Yoshika is the healer so she might magic away the drunk and the concussion.

>> No.22309258

In your experience, there are only three kinds of men - those who learn by reading, those who learn by observation, and the other eighty percent who have to stick their tongues in an electrical socket at the age of five. To that list you add yourself as the outlier, the man who knows Witches. After a few minutes of recovering, flat on your back, you're able to stagger upright, completely sober and unconcussed, with no lasting damage whatsoever.

But that's okay.

That can be fixed.

"Pilot," Mack asks you as he helps you to your feet, "how god-damned crazy are you, really?"

"Okay, sir," you say. "Are you familiar with gunnery, at all?"

For some reason, Mack grins a little at that, like it's funny only to himself. "You could say that."

"So you know that any moron can hit the ground, because of gravity, right?"

He nods.

"My job is literally to aim at the ground and miss. 'Screwball' is my job description, sir."

Mack chuckles, shaking his head. "Point taken. You've got to have a certain mindset to set sail in peacetime, much less war - and flying's more dangerous by half again, at least." He turns to his podium, and lifts the flat surface, revealing a small storage area crammed with paper and paperclips and dusty pens. "Here," he says. "Since you're a convicted pirate, all official-like, have this."

He hands you a gorgeous brass spyglass.

You accept it, appreciating the expensive heft. "Shoot, after what you did for me-"

"Sure you can," he says. "I figured it'd be perfect for a one-eyed sailor... until Admiral Lee smacked me upside my head and told me to look dashing on someone else's goddamned time." He chuckles, but looks sad at the memory.

>> No.22309264

>Finally, he calms down a bit, and manages to look at Minna. "Uniform Code of Military Justice?"
>Minna giggles. "Pretty good, huh?"

Bad, bad girl.

We taught her well.

>> No.22309273

>>22309252
But Minna can do that too.

>> No.22309276

>>22309208
Yeah, except mine implies implications!

>> No.22309288

>>22309208
>Hell that scene was likely a "take that" at us for overfocusing on her.

Come on you really think I'd do something like that?

>> No.22309304

>>22309258
I see what you did there, Gap an elf.

>> No.22309316

>>22309288
Yes

>> No.22309326

>>22309288
Do you really need to ask?

>> No.22309340

>>22309273
Sure but not quite as well, though I'm sure she could do another kind of healing that's done in a bed or closet without clothes.

>>22309288
I cannot say you would not. Look at all the other things you've taken shots at in this.

>> No.22309343

>>22309288
But she's so damn adorabl-

Okay, okay, we get it.

>> No.22309370

>>22309340
I was talking about her actual "Magic connection" with us that she used to fix us before we killed the Fitzgerald.

>> No.22309383

>>22309370
Oh there was a magic connection alright.

>> No.22309403

>>22309370
>implying we wouldn't mana transfer the fun way

>> No.22309412

>>22309383
If you know what I mean.

>> No.22309425

>>22309370
>>22309383
>>22309403
>>22309412
>J-J-J-JAM IT IN

>> No.22309434

"Sir," you tell Mack, "There IS a pretty good party going on at Barin as we speak."

"And you may consider your crew formally invited," Minna says sweetly.

"Thanks," Mack replies. "I should hit the rack, but my officers have nothing to do... nor the Marines, and I think they earned their keep tonight." Mack shakes his head. "But no party's complete without ice cream, don't you think?"

"No sir," you agree, smiling. "No sir."

As you walk back down the gangplank with Minna, Yoshika, and Robin, each of you carrying a big five-gallon container of fresh ice-cream, Wisdom slips through the surly clouds and strikes your head like a beam of pure moonlight.

Your military decorations were for nothing.

Your fame was insubstantial and abandoned you at the worst moment.

Even name-dropping your formidable connections left you with no traction.

But the moment Maloney stepped aboard the California and let his personal hatred of you rule his decision-making, he was doomed - and so instead of being court-martialed, you're walking away with twice the ice-cream you wanted and a new spyglass, to boot.

Where fame, connections and accolades failed, one thing cut through the chaos and flew in the face of logic, reason and probability to save your ass - your ability to piss people off.

Truly, you are the Bounce King.

>> No.22309450

>>22309340
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVTN5o9Kgu8

>> No.22309455

>>22309434

>inb4 NEXT TIME ON SWQ

>> No.22309459

>>22309434

>> No.22309468

>>22309434

>> No.22309473

>>22309434
Truly a valuable lesson.

>> No.22309475

>>22309434
We're Big Damn Heroes.

Also, this is gonna come bitting us somehow. This is too good an ending.

>> No.22309486

>>22309434
Well not quite a swing and a miss. Especially for us!

>> No.22309497

>>22309434

>> No.22309499

>>22309475
inb4 warning sirens

>> No.22309511

>>22309434
>Young actually calling Mack "sir"

Goddamn, he's the first Navy person we actually respect. That's some high praise.

>> No.22309513

>>22309499
inb4 enemies scuttling the ship while Mack's men attend the party

>> No.22309534

>>22309499
Oh fucking no. Cockblocking us is one thing, but icecream-blocking our sisters, this shall not pass.

>> No.22309553

>>22309511
And now that we've built this rapport, Mack is killed.

Spyglass memento all that is left!

>> No.22309556

>>22309434
And then Sanya sudoku'd. The End.

>> No.22309567

>>22309556
Nah, she found the wonder that is Vodka.

>> No.22309569

>>22309553
Nah, he can't die. He's in 89. So he's safe from eerything.

>> No.22309582

>>22309569
wait WHAT?

>> No.22309588

>>22309556
then how would katya come to be?

>> No.22309589

>>22309567
>drunk Sanya
My heart would never be ready. I'm sorry, Yoshika, but that's how it is.

>> No.22309595

>>22309434

YFW this is the ENTIRE platform that gets Young elected to the White House

>> No.22309606

>>22309582

>He doesn't read '89
Pleb as fuck.

>> No.22309610

>>22309595
>Young
>President of anything
Oh god no.

>> No.22309614

>>22309610

You mean oh god yes.

>> No.22309616

>wake up
>go to sleep
>wake up
>play Borderlands. Fun! Until oh god more fucking sidequests why
>Play X-Com, realize Classic is suffering
>Play FTL, RNG rapes me without lube
>Write SWQ, SO MUCH FUN

WE'RE GOING

A LITTLE DEEPER TONIGHT

INDICATE YOUR NEXT MOVE. EATING YOURSELF SICK WITH THE KAWAII SQUAD TO BANISH THE SADS IS A GIVEN. BUT WHAT ELSE?

>> No.22309617

>>22309582
Mack is married to Georgette and friends with Nixon.

In Strikers 89 Fronk is saved by Nixon's old war buddies wife Georgette.

Mack is safe from errything.

>> No.22309623

>>22309606
What is '89 besides a year?

>> No.22309626

>>22309595
That and the smoking hot german wifey who's *really* running things, with sensible financial policies.

>> No.22309629

>>22309616
Actually sleep, wake up tomorrow morning.

>> No.22309633

>>22309616
Go sit on the docks and talk about home with the Yeagers.

>> No.22309639

>>22309616
Find more alcohol. We're not going to want to remember this night.

>> No.22309642

>>22309610
shit would get done.

because if it didn't young would get bored.

>> No.22309643

>>22309616
hot dickings, then sleep

>> No.22309644

>>22309616
check if Sean and Ian are both still alive and brag about ice cream

>> No.22309645

>>22309553

He's not a female in Supernatural god damn son you crazy

>> No.22309653

>>22309616

BACK TO PARTY

WITH ICE CREAM

AND LET'S SEE IAN AND PERRINE AND HIS MOM THREE-WAY

>> No.22309656

>>22309616
>He didnt cuddle with is hugpillow

>> No.22309662

>>22309616
Figure out why we never go any purple hearts despite being seriously wounded on multiple occasions.

>> No.22309665

>>22309623
Strike Witches 89, the quest Ghost runs on tuesday. Not as hijinks filled as SWQ because the MC has actually read the Military Regulations

>> No.22309666

>>22309623
Strike witches '89

As for the vote? see what happened with Ian/Perrine and Heidi.

Think of a way to check on Sanya tomorrow if nothing solves itself tonight.

>> No.22309670

>>22309629
With our new girlfriend.

>> No.22309671

>>22309616
Err, Normal XCOM raped my ass, I'm really not looking forward too Classic.

>> No.22309673

>>22309623
the year.

strikers '89 occurs right before and during world war 3.

in a world that has ace-combat superweapons everywhere in case of renewed martian invasion.

also has a sub-spinoff involving tankers

>> No.22309674

>>22309616

I'LL NEVER STOP LOOKING

but Minna can help, preferably in her room

>> No.22309676

>>22309616
well were sober now, we need to fix this.

>> No.22309683

>>22309616
Ask Minna what Sanya's emotional state is.
If we don't like answer, go find her and shove her into Eila's lap and tell them to stop being idiots to each other.

>> No.22309691

>>22309656

PLEASE DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT

TINY MIO DOES NOT LIKE ME TALKING ABOUT THAT

ohgod

>> No.22309692

>>22309616
Are we still going to see if Sanya is okay?
What about checking on Ian, and see if his mom found him with Perrine?

>> No.22309693

>>22309670
Would like cuddles and sleep with Minna.

>> No.22309694

>>22309616

WE NEED TO FIND ADORABLE COSSACK WITH THE KAWAII SQUAD IN TOW, ADMINISTER HUGS AND ICE CREAM.

>> No.22309698

>>22309616
Don't we have, like, paperwork to do? Mission reports, flight logs and all that?

>> No.22309699

>>22309616
We should probably team up with Minna, find Sanya, give her a bucket of ice cream, double team hug her and then after Sanya is feeling better we go to our room and have bed breaking sex with Minna.

>> No.22309709

>>22309616
find the sanyandere

>> No.22309711

>>22309699
This is something we all could agree on.

>> No.22309714

>>22309691
I can talk about it all I want chump!

>> No.22309717

>>22309626
Shit, we Bill Clinton and Minna Hilary now son.

>> No.22309718

>>22309692
>What about checking on Ian, and see if his mom found him with Perrine?

That'd just mostly entail looking for a series of craters.

>> No.22309720

>>22309691

TINY MIO FROWNS AT YOUR INFIDELITY.

>> No.22309727

>>22309694
>>22309692
>>22309683
>>22309699
>>22309709
>>22309711


GODDAMNIT PLANEFAG JUST YELLED AT US FOR FOCUSING TO MUCH ON SANYA!

DO SOMETHING ELSE!!!

>> No.22309728

>>22309698
pic

>>22309709
>sanyandere
what

>> No.22309735

Goddamn it, it's happening again, even after that scene. why not spend some time with Robin and Yoshika as Sanya IS NOT THE ONLY LITTLE SISTER, you retards.

>> No.22309753

So if Yoshika is our little sister now, she and Robin can call Minna their big sister?

>> No.22309758

>>22309727
It's either that or hot Minna dickings.

>> No.22309759

>>22309727

>> No.22309763

Spend more time with the adorable Fusoan.

>> No.22309764

>>22309616
Let's go hang out with LYNETTE (and maybe Wilma). We never get to talk to Canuck leetle seester.

>> No.22309774

>>22309676
Jesus that makes me cringe just watching it.
>>22309645
I see what you did there.

>> No.22309778

>>22309763
ya know what. changing to this

>> No.22309779

>>22309758
>hot minna dickings are bad
wat

>> No.22309786

>>22309727
Point. Break out the ice cream.

Do we owe Zucchini any or are we going to leave her out of it?

>> No.22309789

>>22309758
Then I vote for hot Minna dickings damnit!

>>22309759
Sanya is not for lewd. She said so herself.

>> No.22309796

>>22309616
>WE'RE GOING

>A LITTLE DEEPER TONIGHT

GLORIOUS

>> No.22309803

>>22309753
I think they have to wait until the marriage.

>> No.22309805

Troll Tesla.

>> No.22309806

>>22309753
I don't see why not.

Honestly while the Sanya matter is around, we should at least fully wrap up the Yoshika one first.

>>22309764
Good idea, let's have the 4th little sister join in the good times.

>>22309786
I don't see why not.

>> No.22309823

>>22309789

>> No.22309825

You know, actual fucking sleep sounds awesome. And/or sleeping WITH Minna.

>> No.22309834

>>22309786
I think nobody likes Zucchini. Or at least PF writes her that way.

>> No.22309848

>>22309759
2lewd4me

>> No.22309849

>>22309834
Which is sad, because even hyperactive little girls need love and care too.

>> No.22309853

>>22309616
Wanna go build a mech Shirley and Chuck?

>> No.22309860

>>22309834
that was due to Italy being considered a joke in the war thus he treated her like many fanartists treat Meiling (Touhou): as a butt monkey. Funny as he's a fan of Meiling's and dislikes that treatment.

I think he's been trying to turn that trend around.

>> No.22309864

>>22309825
Damnit Young, get your mind out of your pants and back into action.

There's ANTICS to get up to!

>> No.22309868

>>22309763
I can get behind that. She did save our liver, and our life, after all.

>> No.22309878

>>22309860

Remember this statement. In about an hour or so.

>> No.22309882

>>22309860
Last time we saw Lucchini she told us to kiss her ass. Before that she literally rang Ian's bell.

I don't think so.

>> No.22309900

>>22309864
Shut up brain, we've got more important things to do.

>> No.22309905

>>22309717
"I did not have sex with that Waltrud."

>> No.22309909

>>22309882
Keep in mind how she's been treated to that point; Karma's a bitch, yo.

>> No.22309912

>>22309878

>> No.22309913

>>22309860
Fair enough. Icecream for all!

If Sanya wants any she can find us.

>> No.22309948

>>22309878
OH SHIT IS ABOUT TO GET REAL!!!

>> No.22309950

We probably should give Yoshika and robin some attention.

Though a happy, ice-creamed-up Minna is tempting too.

>> No.22309980

>>22309905
Dude WTF you talkin bout?

MC and Minna would go, "WE BOTH HAD SEX WITH THE WALTRUDE!!!"

Besides, they could just point to the picture and ask if anyone could say no.

>> No.22309981

>>22309878
this_gonna_be_good.gif

>> No.22309986

>>22309950
I don't see why we can't have it all.

Ice cream party with Yoshika and Robin and Minna followed by a more private afterparty with just Minna

>> No.22309989

>>22309950
Oh, she'll be creamed up when we're through with her alright...

>> No.22310057

Ask Yoshika what her and Mack were talking about anways.

>> No.22310067

An eternity later, you wake up.

Minna is draped over your midsection, an ice cream spoon still in her hand. She's sleeping soundly, her head pillowed on Yoshika's belly, who in turn has her head laid in Robin's lap, who is sleeping reclined against a big wadded-up quilt, her hand resting on your head. The corpse of a slain 5-gallon ice-cream container lies nearby.

Life is good.

You tuck your hands behind your head and just lay on the thick rug covering the floor of Minna's office, completely satisfied. Through the office window you can see that Barin is almost completely socked in, the thick grey overcast starting around three-thousand feet and, if you know anything about English weather, reaching clear up to twenty thousand or so. You don't know much about naval combat, but you doubt the huge naval clash south of England that had everyone on pins and needles the other day was decisive - too many opportunities for battle-lines to lose contact in the fog and in the squalls, and radar-

-you snort. The war seems to hinge increasingly on electromagnetic mastery, as your own experience has shown - but it's such a chaotic and fluid situation you can hardly piece it together, so for the time being, you don't even try.

For now, you're content to just relax.

No sooner have you closed your eyes then you hear footsteps thundering down the hall. Without even thinking, you snatch the short flagpole at the corner of Minna's desk, holding a small German flag, and jam it under the doorknob, wedging the other end against the edge of the thick rug.

"Minna!" The doorknob rattles as Lynette tries to fling it open. "Rommel and Patton are- are-"

You snort, and close your eyes to take another nap.

Predictable.

>Find COSSACK?
>Find CREW?
>Find CREW and search for COSSACK?
>Other?

>> No.22310068

>>22310057
THIS

>> No.22310084

>>22310067
>>Find CREW?
To me, our aircrew!

>> No.22310089

>>22310067
Go see what in the hell Rommel and Patton are up too now.

Oh, and food. Always need food.

>> No.22310091

>>22310067
>Other?

>Find ROMMEL and PATTON

>> No.22310094

>>22310067
Go right back to sleep.

>> No.22310097

>>22310067
Find Rommel and Patton, after foods.

>> No.22310106

>>22310067
Ask her how her sisters are. Rommel and Patton are not our problem. Let's just chat.

>> No.22310110

>Find CREW and search for COSSACK?
>Try to see what's going on with those two if possible

>> No.22310112

>>22310094
I figured we were going to do that anyway. Should we wake Minna up or let her rest?

>> No.22310120

>Find CREW and search for COSSACK?

>> No.22310121

>>22310067
planefag, will you please for the love of all that is holy please help me kill whoever made that.

>> No.22310133

>>22310067
Find FOOD then Search for COSSACK.

Sean is fine and will likely prefer his privacy with Mio. And Ian can handle his mother and Perrine by himself, or he'd have found us by now.

>> No.22310134

>>22310067
Find CREW

Ask them how their evenings were.

>> No.22310143

>>22310067
>find CREW and then PATTON and ROMMEL

>> No.22310147

>>22310067
>Find CREW?

Let's find out if Ian managed to survive the shame from his mother finding out about his French gee-eff Take Yoshika in tow, and ask her what the hell she and Mack talked about.

>> No.22310148

>>22310067
>OTHER
Find Rommel and Patton, sort out their problem so that Minna can get some sleep.

Of course this responsible course of action won't win, but I'll try.

>> No.22310171

>>22310148
I will support you in your responsibleness!

>> No.22310184

>Take spyglass
>Give Sean an Ice Pack, and dont say anything.
>Find Ian and find out how his mother took the whole "French GF" thing

bring Yoshika along, why not? She wanted to spend time with us.

>> No.22310198

>>22310067
Ask Minna about COSSACK's current feels.

>> No.22310207

Find the crew.

>> No.22310214

>>22310148
You have my sword.

>> No.22310218

>>22310148
Minna'll die from shock when she finds out.
+1

>> No.22310225

>>22310148
Find crew and cossack, then solve problem like a responsible person

>> No.22310226

>>22310184
This while dragging Lynn along and sorting out the Patton/Rommel thing

>> No.22310265

In no real order:

Wake up the room.
Leave Sanya to sort her shit out.
Find Ian and Sean, troll both.
Figure out what the fuck is going on now.
Ask Yoshika what's up.
Something something Minna.
Leave Robin to burn things.

>> No.22310310

Unrelatedly for Panzer

>> No.22310383

>>22310265
We must finnish the Cossack off at all costs!

Down with communist sisters!

>> No.22310403

Eventually, Minna wakes up on her own, and regardless of your multiple pressing issues requiring immediate attention, insists that all four of you repair to the dining room and actually have some breakfast before charging off into scurrilous insanities. You relent, eventually, being dragged along with a young Witch latched onto each wrist and Minna bringing up the rear, herding you forward.

You walk into the dining room to find Sakamoto reclining leisurely in one of the chairs, a mug of fresh coffee held carelessly in one hand. She's watching Sean with lidded eyes, and smiling like a canary-eating-cat.

Sitting across the table from her, Sean picks up his own mug and takes a long, satisfied drought.

"Passed out smiling," he says smugly. "Doesn't count."

"What are they ta-"

"Tell you when you're older," Minna says automatically, covering Yoshika's ears and steering her right into the kitchen. You follow, in search of coffee and eats.

Inside, Perrine is rapidly flipping pancakes over in a pan, as Ian tries to mix up some more batter. He's attacking it half-heatedly, leaning away at an angle to keep his cigarette ash clear of the batter.

"Ian, that's freaking disgusting," you opine.

"I know, right?" Perrine agrees. "Not befitting an English gentleman."

"I'm American, you froggy-breathed bint," Ian snaps.

Perrine glances at you, eyes filled with uncertainty.

Your eyes cold and hard, you give her the slightest of nods.

She picks up the sprayer-hose attachment from the back of the sink and, with expert aim, extinguishes Ian's cigarette, and most of his face.

You manage to escape the room with some coffee and fresh pancakes while Ian's still chasing Perrine with the batter-bowl, both of them laughing like loons.

>> No.22310411

>>22310383
Little extreme there buddy.

>> No.22310429

>>22310403
>Ian's still chasing Perrine with the batter-bowl, both of them laughing like loons.

>> No.22310440

>>22310310
I like how *jam* is a sound effect

>> No.22310444

>>22310403

Alls well on this side of heaven.

>> No.22310447

>>22310403
Things are going far too well. Zucchini-sourced curveball incoming.

>> No.22310450

>>22310444
Yep and the sight of Perrine of all people is flipping pancakes is odd but cute.

>> No.22310463

>>22310403
I didn't expect Ian to adjust to his waifu so quickly.

>> No.22310465

>>22310403
Is...Is this a happy post?
With no shenanigans?

>> No.22310470

>>22310403
That is adorable. Goddamn.

>> No.22310479

>>22310465
its a trap!

>> No.22310485

>>22310465
Something feels off. Is there a helmet nearby?

>> No.22310497

>>22310479
Maybe, but I will enjoy it while it lasts damnit!!!

I will fight for the happiness!!

>> No.22310509

And everything was well

>> No.22310512

Obviously something terrible is about to happen.
Like Mom walking in and asking what kind of twisted three(four?)-way we're in.

>> No.22310519

>>22310497
We have just enough time left for a cliffhanger.
Fuck.

>> No.22310525

reading this from my new ipad while I fight for freedom flying my galaxy in planetside 2

>> No.22310529

>>22310509
>beetle

>> No.22310538

>>22310529
i do not understand that image

>> No.22310545

>>22310525
>not TR

>> No.22310547

>>22310538
How about this one?

>> No.22310549

In a few post there will be explosions, death, and PTSD abound.

>> No.22310554

>>22310512
Finally just point at Minna and say "She's my girlfriend, nobody else. If somebody says they are its a lie. We're pretty serious. Thats it."

>> No.22310555

>>22310538
good. Thought I was the only one

>> No.22310556

>>22310538
It's ok

>> No.22310566

>>22310547
Nope.

>> No.22310572

>>22310525
man you have balls flying that giant flying target

>> No.22310577

>>22310566
...Good... Good...

>> No.22310590

>>22310545
He must have gotten tired of winning.

>> No.22310608

>>22310403
inb4 MARTIANS

>> No.22310611

>>22310590
Good. TR still beating the Vanu Scum and New Commies on SolTech. All is well with the world.

>> No.22310613

>>22310590
I am on matterson and the NC control two out of three warzones. Indar is my outfits bane

>> No.22310621

>>22310525
>"OH, OH FUCK, THEY HAVE SO MUCH AA. GET US OUT OF HERE MAN"

>"Hold on, I have to go stop Erwin Rommel and George Patton slap fighting each other."

>> No.22310624

You rejoin Sean and Sakamoto in the next room, look between them, and wisely say nothing involving... them. "So, Sanya went missing last night," you inform them. "And I don't like the circumstances."

"Is it something serious?" Sakamoto asks. "Is she in danger?"

"Nothing like that," you say. "Just... I'd like to talk to her."

"Ah," Sakamoto says. "I'll leave it up to you, then."

"You have any idea where she is?"

"No," Minna says, returning from the kitchen with Ian and Perrine in tow. "Come to think, somebody should've seen her by now. She usually eats with us in the morning, at least." She looks at you, seeming to sense something. "Is something the matter with her?"

>spill
>keep it confidential

>> No.22310636

>>22310624
Spill, we do not have the proper feels for dealing with her trauma.

>> No.22310640

>>22310624

>keep it confidential

>> No.22310644

>>22310624
>spill

They will find out sooner or later and it'd be better if they know now.

That and someone else likely saw it and still remembers.

>> No.22310650

>>22310624

"She tried to talk like a fireman."

>> No.22310652

>>22310624
>spill

>> No.22310659

>>22310636
>>22310624
If we're going to do this we do it right. Tell everything.

>> No.22310662

>>22310624
>spill

If we can't trust Minna and Mio, there's no one we cant trust.

>> No.22310664

>>22310624
>That pic
Fucking Lol'd
>NOPE NOT A FUCKING WORD!

>> No.22310672

>>22310624
Spill

>> No.22310675

>>22310624
Take Minna aside and inform her privately.

>> No.22310680

>>22310624

One word should suffice.

"Cupcakski"

>> No.22310685

>>22310650
This

>> No.22310692

>>22310662
Well yeah, but there's still Robin, Yoshika, Perrine, Sean and Ian.

>> No.22310700

>>22310650
THIS

>>22310621
yep I fly IN to the AA fire and deliver ten pissed off max's to smash there faces in while I fix my baby up.

>> No.22310701

>>22310692
Oh, they're all there? Then take Minna aside to tell her.

>> No.22310706

>>22310624
spill

>> No.22310721

>>22310692
Robin knows about the Sanya search and I think the reason behind it.

That and like I said they will find out sooner or later from someone.

>> No.22310735

>>22310680

Actually, this might be better than a full disclosure. It'll garner her the appropriate amount of sympathy.

>> No.22310750

>>22310624
Spill, but just to Minna.
We need to get Eila to apologise, and Sanya to accept said apology so they can go back to being second cutest couple on the base.
Also, what happened to Minna's location sense? Shouldn't she know where she is just by MAGIC?

>> No.22310766

>>22310662
To think, we once held them at gunpoint because we thought they were gonna kill us...

Oh how the times have changed.

>> No.22310768

>>22310624
Too happy.... Sanya still missing... God damnit planefag...

>> No.22310792

"She... she tried to talk like a fireman," you say hesitantly.

Everyone at the table gives you blank looks, except Minna, who heard the entire tale of your drunken escapades aboard the California. She squints at you. "She what?"

"... Cupcakeski," you say.

Everyone else continues with the blank looks, but understanding washes over Minna's face. "Oh... oh. Oh." She thinks about it. "Oh?... OH!"

"Yeah."

"You guys," Ian opines, "are weird."

"We should find her," Minna tells you. "You want to get going?"

"Just a second," you say, and tilt your plate, sliding two whole flapjacks into your gullet at once. A little bit of chewing and one mug-chug later, you stand up.

"Sure, lets git."

>Bring CREW?

>> No.22310802

>>22310792

>Husband wife act

Bwahahaha.

Just the two should be good.

>> No.22310804

>>22310792
Nyet. But see if we can pick up Eila.

>> No.22310806

>>22310792
Nope. They stay.

>> No.22310809

>>22310792

Do we really want to bring down the full assault of the recently sexed up morale brigade?

Captcha says absolutely.

>> No.22310816

>>22310792
>>Bring CREW?
If they want to. But a smaller group is less likely to panic Cossack.

>> No.22310817

>Have them help find her but leave the talking to a select few people such as Minna or the little sisters.
Finding Elia may help.

>> No.22310819

>>22310792
No.

>> No.22310820

>>22310792

Just the husband and wife comedy act.

>> No.22310825

>>22310792
I think this should go this one with just our wingman. Or wingwoman, as it were.

>> No.22310826

>>22310792
Not crew, Grab Eila

>> No.22310832

>Bring Eila?

>> No.22310838

>>22310611
I love to fight the TR as NC the fights are fun and are more of a tank on tank slug fest.

>> No.22310839

>>22310832

nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

>> No.22310850

>>22310832
YEEES!

>> No.22310851

>>22310832
An Elia may prove useful.

>> No.22310853

>>22310817
Here I mean have them search but have them leave while the select few talk.

>> No.22310857

>>22310832
Y... Yes?

>> No.22310858

>>22310832
Yes. We need to sort this shit out.

Actually no, that's too complex for right now. We need to get them to actually START sorting this shit out. And they won't if we don't make them.

>> No.22310864

>>22310832

We can't bring her in yet.

Sanya needs to moan and bitch for awhile before we bring her in.

>> No.22310873

>>22310850

Why would you inflict that on her?

SHE'S FEELING WEIRD ABOUT AWKWARD GIRLBONERS. SRSLY.

Well, assuming that her thought process on running off wasn't: "Well, I seem to have hit puberty. Time to fuck Elia until it's rape."

>> No.22310878

>>22310832
Ohgodglasses

whyboner

>> No.22310879

>>22310832
Yes.

>> No.22310890

>>22310832
No.

>> No.22310897

>>22310832
No yet.

>> No.22310899

>>22310792
>>22310832
Bring only Minna and Eila

>> No.22310911

>>22310832
Not a fan of Eila, but leaving the two on bad terms seems sort of crappy

>> No.22310922

>>22310832
Don't try to bait us. Don't bring her until we short Sanya's guilt out

>> No.22310925

>>22310832
later

>> No.22310940

well one could reduce teh number of people if Minna's ability is working right (it should make finding Sanya easier)

>> No.22310959

>>22310792
>>22310802
>>22310820
I love it when they act like this. Minna and Young, the Parents of the younger witches.

>> No.22310960

>>22310832
No, we should keep her in the wings, but we don't bring her in at first. We sort other things out first before we try to get them to kiss and make up.

>> No.22310994

>>22310792

BRING CREW, BRING PATTON, ROMMEL, ANYOONE WHO CARES.

HELL LET'S BRING PADDY AND HEIDI AS WELL

WE'LL HUG SANYA UNTIL IT'S RAPE

>> No.22311002

>>22309258
>>22309434
Pretty late, but I just got to say: damn, he's a massive bro. Why can't ALL of the Navy be like him? Instead of, you know, faggots?

>> No.22311016

>>22310994
*Slap*

No.

>> No.22311017

>>22310832

NO. BUT BRING CREW, ROMMEL, PADDY, PATTON AND HEIDI AS WELL AS MINNA, MEEYAFOOGEE, ROBIN AND YES, OH LAWD PERRINE AND SAKABROTO

>> No.22311042

>>22311017
I am going to gut you.

>> No.22311068

>>22311017
>>22310994

>> No.22311074

>no Eila
>good choice

You and Minna begin trolling the grounds, your companion focusing on her special magical aptitude, reaching out through the base to try and find the young Russian Night Witch. You walk to the top of North Tower, then down through the lower levels, and around the grounds.

An hour later, on the rear dock, Minna turns to you and sighs. "I don't think she's on the island."

You frown. "Then where the hell could she be?"

Minna points. The rear dock is on the outer grounds, just past the castle's ancient curtain wall, so the opposite shoreline is visible. "Eddington strip."

You quirk your eyebrow. "Isn't that just a grass emergency landing strip?"

"It was," Minna says, "but with all the traffic at Barin as of late, they're improving it for heavier use. Usually, when we run into town for groceries or whatever, we take a boat to the dock near Eddington, then borrow a jeep and take it into town."

"Why would she go there, though?"

"Buy Eila a present," Minna says immediately. "If I was feeling guilty as hell, it's what I'd do." Minna glances at her watch. "Looks like it's almost..."

"Guilt o'clock," you mutter.

She smiles sweetly. "Guilt-thirty, actually. Come on, we can take a launch."

>> No.22311075

>>22310959

Yes. Someone IC needs to comment on this to them.

>> No.22311081

>>22310832
not yet

>> No.22311088

>>22310994
PICK THEM UP ONE AT A TIME

AS WE FORM AND IMPROMPTU SONG AND DANCE NUMBER LOOKING FOR SANYA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgzvTHsOxSQ

>> No.22311096

>>22310832
No. Eila will make it far to complex for our brainmeats

>> No.22311108

>>22311074
I knew it.

>> No.22311113

>>22311002
when the AF stops loosing nukes we can have fun, fucking AF, I mean they are honestly terrible at their job of keeping control over nuclear weapons. Also, nice insults, have you even served a day in your life, or are you a fucking idiot who whines about shit he knows nothing about.

>> No.22311123

>>22311074
Hopefully we find her before the guilting hour.

>> No.22311126

>>22311074
I think /tg/ just made two good choices in a row...

>> No.22311141

>>22311113
Bit of an overreaction there

>> No.22311142

>>22311074
>Brining Elia
>Good choice
>Ever
Nope.

>> No.22311164

>>22311126
YOU FOOL! YOU BRING THE WRATH OF BIGWING UPON US!

>> No.22311165

>>22311002
Hell, as a culture, the AF has the most toxic, religious infested culture of the modern US military, their academy is infested with the JESUS POWER people who want to start RELIGIOUS HOLY WAR with Iran, so yeah, you like the AF, I hope you are drafted into a holy war with Iran to serve those needs, you fucking stupid child. Literally this is the worst sort of civilian navalgazing I've ever seen on the internet.

>> No.22311180

>>22311113
I meant in the story, wiseass. You know, clouded by the immature service rivalry of a hotshot idiot 20-year old pilot.

>> No.22311183

>>22311165
>>22311113
Get a load of this cunt

>> No.22311188

Twenty minutes later, you're standing on the edge of a small floating dock, looking apprehensively at the sand on the beach.

"What's your problem?" Minna asks.

"Remember what Maloney said last night?" you say, eying the English soil warily.

Minna snorts in a most unladylike fashion. "That was before he royally fucked up and gave an American Medal of Honor recipient cause to send several formal letters of complaint around - to say nothing of the ones I'm going to post. He'll be busy for a while yet."

"Okay," you say warily, and step onto the beach. Minna is leading you up a narrow path to a waiting jeep with a bored-looking RAF airman slumped in the drivers seat... when you see it.

The Beach Fort.

>> No.22311195

>>22311165
aww shit

>> No.22311207

>>22311188
>beach fort
I'm scared

>> No.22311208

>>22311188
Planefag + pillowfort =

>> No.22311222

>>22311165

>> No.22311231

>>22311113
>loosing

Okay, bro, dude, guy. Dude. Hey. Dude.

"Loosing" means to "let something loose." Like, "loose an arrow" is a fancy way to say "fire an arrow." You mean "lose," as in "misplace."

When you're talking about nuclear warheads, this is an especially important distinction to make.

>> No.22311240

>>22311188
No Pilots allowed sign in front?

>> No.22311245

>>22311231

Oh. Oh Burn.

>> No.22311250

>>22311188
I'm surprised Young was worried after how that guy made a fool of himself.

One simply doesn't have his men pull his guns on a guy and his witch sisters on a US marine vessel headed by a guy with a witch girlfriend and Marines who are not too happy.

>> No.22311254

>>22311180
He's Army Air Force, jackass, the AF doesn't exist yet.
>>22311195
See, I have a problem with people idealizing any branch, and people posting igorance, or hurr/durring is well.. honestly its dumb. Go back to /b/ or school, there is enough MC IS HURR,and for once MC's been not terrible.
>>22311222
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/06/22/AR2005062200598.html

http://www.af.mil/pdf/HQ_Review_Group_Report.pdf

>> No.22311255

>>22311188
BRING IT DOWN!

>> No.22311274

>>22311254
>>22311165
>>22311113
NavalAnon, put your trip back on.

>> No.22311275

>>22310960
Or you know, go down on each other. Whatever!
>Young's face when they invite him in.

>> No.22311280

>>22311274
its not naval he can take a joke

>> No.22311289

>>22311254
go be mad somewhere else.
Like seriously, take a break from the internet.

>> No.22311294

>>22311231
Sorry about my grammar master planefag. Liquor does that to me, but yeah, I have huge issues about RAH RAH AF folks, because the AF has been getting a.. well they've been marked as the clean branch when they have.. their own internal issues, and i sort of take offense to that. You are a gentleman, and a scholar, and your thread amuses me. I'll stop now, please keep up the fun and good work!

>> No.22311314

>>22311254
>they're mean at the Air Force academy

HAHAHAHAHA what about hazing and beatings at Annapolis bro? Shit, the windows on the upper stories of the AF Academy? They don't open. Because too many people jumped out of the goddamn things. That's not a joke. That happens. Religious intolerance is the least of your worries, there.

>> No.22311316

>>22311294
navalanon u r drank

>> No.22311325

>>22311141
Holy fuck, I made that image.

I made that image, and someone saved it, and posted it in a Strike Witches Quest thread.

I think this is what heaven feels like.

>> No.22311340

>>22311250
That guy is supposed to be good at politics right?

>> No.22311358

>>22311340
Were just that good.

>> No.22311367

>>22311325
It's a deserving image.

>> No.22311371

>>22311340
Being frothing, raging mad tends to negate preexisting advantages.

>> No.22311399

Can we just get on with the quest?

>> No.22311433

Psst, hey you.

Good news on the beer front. Nothing yet but ho-lee-shit did we ever brew a pair of winners. I seriously think we could do this shit.

Better put your fuzzy goggles on, bitch. It's comin' at ya.

>> No.22311516

inb4 NEXT TIME ON STRIKE WITCHES QUEST

>> No.22311522

>>22311516
RAAAGE!

>> No.22311528

>>22311516

>> No.22311529

>>22311075
TAKE NOTE OF THIS PLANEFAG.

>> No.22311564

We've reached image limit, just a note.

>> No.22311587

It's been more than an hour and no Lucchini.

>> No.22311588

On the beach lies a towering masterpiece of impromptu architecture, discarded packing crates and tarpaulins forming the framework for a mighty Beach Fort, towering a good fifteen feet over the English sands. Large cushions - like the kind found on outdoor pool loungers - forms the bulwark of the structure, keeping the wind out and the interior comfortable. Standing atop the mighty structure is Luuchini, bathing-suit clad, as she leans out from a flagpole flying the colors of Italy proudly from the roof.

"HEEEEEEEYYY!" she calls to you, and slaps her suit-clad butt. "KISS MY BUTT, AMERICAN! FORT ITALY SAYS STAY AWAY!"

Soon you see another figure clamoring up the side of Fort Italy. Producing your new spyglass, you snap it out to full length and apply it to your eye.

"Sanya!" you cry with delight.

Minna takes the spyglass from you and uses it herself. "Huh. She's playing with Luuchini?"

Playing she is, wearing her own bathing suit and taking to the top of the fort herself. Even from this distance your sharp eyes can pick out her focused expression as she tries to seat a flagpole of her own, this one flying a Soviet Union banner.

"Well, lets go visit Fort Italy," you say, and you and Minna start across the sand towards them. You must admit, it's a nice location for a Fort - the thing looks much like temporary party-shacks you've seen enlisted men make elsewhere, but with more an element of childish whimsy and unfettered grandiosity. Luuchini sees you coming and leaps to the ground, daring inside her massive fort and emerging with what looks like a water pistol.

"HAVE AT THEE, INTRUDER!" her voice carries across the beach.

You sigh, relaxing, enjoying the sight of two little girls, made warriors before their time, having fun. All you can hear is the crashing of the waves, the delighted shrieks of Sanya as Luuchini grows bored waiting for you and turns her watergun on her friend, and the low, throaty drone of four Wright-Patterson Cyclone engines.

Waithwat

>> No.22311622

>>22311588
oh god it's about to be run over by a B-17

>> No.22311630

>>22311587

There's always one asshole in a horror movie who goes WELL AT LEAST IT CAN'T BE WORSE and then things immediately get worse and everyone else looks at them and says WHY DID YOU SAY THAT

*ahem*

WHY DID YOU SAY THAT

>> No.22311634

>>22311588
Oh shit

>> No.22311635

>>22311588

Ohgodwat

RUN SAVE THE LITTLE SISTAS

>> No.22311659

>>22311630
Ever listen to Patton Oswalt's bit where he dunks on an audience member who ruins a quiet leadin to the punchline?

"WHEN ALL IS DUST, AND THE NEUROMANCERS WALK THE WASTES, THEY WILL FIND THIS DISC AND KNOW THAT I WAS A DOUCHEBAG! I AM UNTO A GOD!"

>> No.22311660

>>22311588
blood will be shed this day

>> No.22311662

>>22311587
>>22311588
>posts exactly one second later

The horror.

>> No.22311669

>>22311630
YOU IMPLIED YOU WOULD REDEEM LUCCHINI
NOT MAKE HER SAD

>> No.22311700

>>22311588
>Wright-Patterson Cyclone
Nigga you best be joking.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wright_Cyclone is what you mean. Silly planefag.

>> No.22311703

>>22311588
SHIT!! RUN TO THEM, SAVE THEM EVEN IF WE LOSE A LEG AS A RESULT.

>> No.22311777

Through the overcast, almost a mile or more down the beach, you see a B-17 break through the overcast. It's heading down the beach, towards Fort Italy, and...

"... what the fuck?" you muse, snatching your spyglass away from Minna and applying it to your eye. Through the glass, you can see clearly that the fuselage of the ship has been cut down a bit, and the cabin roof is gone, leaving an open cockpit, like some 1930s monoplane fighter. The pilot is just barely visible behind a low windscreen.

As you watch, the imposing drone of the four Cyclones cuts out, and you see the props begin to windmill freely. The plane dives towards earth, trading altitude for airspeed. You and Minna hold your breath as the plane grows larger and larger, flying directly towards you - and the ground.

"It takes two men at least to handle those bastards," you mutter.

"I know it," Minna replies. Aircraft's control surfaces are actuated solely by the pilot's muscle power; steel cables connected to the control stick or yoke. On a big plane - especially when they're loaded with bombs - it takes two men just to manage the controls... especially pulling out of a dive.

But the Fortress jockey manages it, leveling off only feet above the ground... heading right towards Fort Italy.

"Shit he's going to belly-in-" Minna says even as you cup your hands to your mouth and scream "SANYA, LUUCHINI, RUN! RUN! RUN!"

Sanya looks down the beach to see a Flying Fortress swooping towards her at treetop height, its big silver wings and nose coming straight for her, and she promptly starts running.

Luuchini, however, vaults to the roof of Fort Italy, seizes her flag, and begins waving it.

"ITALIANS NEVER RUN!' she declares triumphantly.

>> No.22311804

>>22311777
SHIT!! RUN TO HER!!

>> No.22311815

>>22311777
you fool!

>> No.22311822

>>22311777

ARE YOU BRAINDEAD YOU SPAGHETTI RAT. RUNNN.

Run to save her.

>> No.22311823

>>22311777
QUICK GNOME THE PLANE UP HIGHER

>> No.22311832

>>22311777
GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC GNOME MAGIC

>> No.22311837

>>22311777
Time to be a hero

>> No.22311839

>>22311777
GODDAMMIT GET THEM OUT OF THERE

>> No.22311844

>>22311777
>italians never run
I'm Italian and goddamn did that make me chuckle

>> No.22311847

>>22311832
GNOME DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!

>> No.22311859

>>22311777
What are you talking about you stupid Bint! You run all the time!

>> No.22311862

>>22311777
Doesn't she have super awesome shields or something?

She's fine.

>> No.22311867

>>22311777
Warning! Warning! we have hit page nine and are droping fast! We need to Jump ship sir!

>> No.22311873

>>22311777
Well she's right. Libido never goes away until it's satisfied.

>> No.22311874

>>22311847
I thought you said you wouldn't make her a buttmonkey! This has 50 shades of the "Meiling being ultra-stereotypical chinese" butt-monkeyism all over it!

>> No.22311875

>>22311777
SPAGHETTI SAUCE

>> No.22311887

>>22311862
That's Miyafuji, Zucchini's is harnessing light as a weapon.

>> No.22311890

>>22311862
Very true

gingglo easy

No captcha we aren't her gigolo, but she probably is easy.

When she grows up.

>> No.22311900

>>22311777
You fool! Italians run all the time! Now is the best time to do as your people do and flee!

>> No.22311903

>>22311887
No... Miyafuji just has redonkulous levels of magic power. Where did you get light as a weapon from?

>> No.22311907

>>22311887
No, hers is the shields. Remember the final episode of S1?

>> No.22311917

>>22311862
Weight of an Unladen B-17G: 18 tons.
Weight of a Small Italian Witch: Less than 90 pounds.
Chances of her shields deflecting 18 tons of B-17 falling to the earth: Well, take a guess.

>> No.22311938

>>22311917
Actually damn good because of Magics and shields.

>> No.22311940

>>22311903
From the SW Wikia article same place that stated Miyafuji's speciality is healing/shields.

>> No.22311951

>>22311874
She'll kungfu the plane out of the air or something.

>> No.22311956

>>22311917
how many Italian witches can we fit in a B-52

>> No.22311968

>>22311887
I... what?
No known witch has that power. Zucchini has RAMMING SPEED. That's her thing, that she does.

Also, Fap Angel, toldyaso.

>> No.22311969

>>22311956
after this? zero

>> No.22311972

>>22311956
... by volume or weight?

>> No.22311992

>>22311940
>wikia
Well then.

>> No.22312005

The Fortress pilot takes his ship into the soft sandy beach expertly, laying her belly on the earth with an incredibly gentle touch. You've heard that flying a Fortress is like "flying a hotel from the basement window" so you can't help but be impressed with the skill of the pilot, even through your cold, detached horror. Fort Italy is too far away. You'd never reach it in time. You can only watch as the massive bomber digs into the sand, nose tearing a deep furrow in the beach as it slides towards Fort Italy with terrible momentum.

Minna finds your hand and you both squeeze each other's palm tightly as the B-17 slows, nose plowing through the sand, closer and closer to Fort Italy. Luuchini stands her ground, back straight, flagpole forward, as if she can slow the coming aircraft by sheer force of will.

The B-17 is less then twenty feet from Fort Italy when it finally slows to a walking pace - but still it skids on, the huge nose coming ever closer to Luuchini. Finally, with a groan of tortured aluminum you can hear clear across the beach, the Fort comes to a final halt only inches from the first packing crates and seat-cushions.

"ROMAN PEOPLE ARE BEST PEOPLE!" Luuchini states, swirling her flag around her and thrusting it down at the pilot, who's a little below the uppermost parapet of Fort Italy.

The pilot clambers out, drops to the wing and is met by Luuchini, who's jumping and dancing around him like a Jack Russel Terrier on a suger high, babbling excitedly.

That's about when he slaps her across the chops, seizes her by the waist while she's still stunned, and slings her over his shoulder.

Then he starts running straight towards you.

>reaction?

>> No.22312032

>>22312005

Drop kick the bastard

>> No.22312048

>>22312005
Mad. We're about to go full dadmode on her.

>> No.22312049

>>22312005
Run away

>> No.22312050

>>22311874
>butt monkey

But the pillowfort survived! It miraculously survived! Now don't you feel silly.

>> No.22312054

>>22312005
He kidnapped Libido.
No mercy.

>> No.22312055

>>22312032
This.

Nobody slaps our teammates and gets away with it without greivous bodily harm except our teammates and their immediate superiors!

>> No.22312057

>>22312005
lets keep a cool head. the man just nearly died

>> No.22312058

>>22312005
WITCH JOUSTING?
WITCH JOUSTING!
PICK MINNA UP AND CHARGE!

>> No.22312059

>>22312032
Yeah, we wanted to slap her first!

>> No.22312063

>>22312005
Shouldertackle.

>> No.22312066

>>22311992
Though I admit the article doesn't define her power clearly compared to others, though I question the anime's usage.

>She has the ablility to directly concentrate, manipulate somewhat, and discharge magic energy (光熱攻撃 Kounetsu Kougeki (Sunlight Strike; lit. "Light and Heat Attack")

From her page (not clear at all)

>Brace for impact, don't do anything rash

>> No.22312071

>>22312005
Brother. Calling it now.

>> No.22312077

>>22312005
Dafuq.

>> No.22312083

>>22312005
Coordinate with Minna.
We run at him, then baseball slide into his legs while Minna catches Lucchini.

>> No.22312088

>>22312005
Walk calmly toward him, she deserved it.

>> No.22312089

>>22312005
Oh shit, it's going to explode isn't it?

>> No.22312095

>>22312088
agreed

>>22312089
I bet its going to

>> No.22312101

>>22312089
No duh.

>> No.22312106

>>22312005
Pocket sand

>> No.22312107

>>22312005
Wait, WHERE'S SANYA

>> No.22312111

>>22312005
...wait. Wait. WAIT.

ONLY ONE KIND OF B-17 HAD AN OPEN COCKPIT!

HOLY FUCK THAT THING IS A FUCKING FLYING BOMB, RUN YOU FUCKERS!

>> No.22312125

....oh fuck that's an Aphrodite bird.

haul ass somewhere else and pray it doesnt go before we can get about a mile between us and it

>> No.22312128

>>22312111
god damn it you are right! RUN YOU DUMB FUCKS!

>> No.22312130

>>22312071
imagine Maloney's horror
>wait.. there are TWO OF YOU NOW?

>> No.22312134

"That - that son of a bitch," you say, balling your fists and running towards the Fortress pilot, heat in your heart. "HOW DARE YOU!"

The pilot, still running like a mad bastard with Luuchini over his shoulder, angles right at you, waving frantically with his free hand. He draws close just as Minna snags the back of your jacket, keeping you from rushing the guy.

"What's the meaning of this?" Minna asks.

"RUN MOTHERFUCKERS!" he screams. "RUN!"

>wat do

>> No.22312135

>>22312005
RUN AWAY!!! ITS ONE OF THOSE FLYING BOMB B-17'S!!!!

>> No.22312137

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Aphrodite
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Aphrodite
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Aphrodite
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Aphrodite

>> No.22312143

>>22312107
Get Sanya away from there!

Where's Shirely when you need her super speed?

>> No.22312148

>>22312111

OH FUCK, GRAB MINA AND RUN.

>> No.22312149

>>22312134
Cheese it.

>> No.22312165

>>22312134
Isnt sanya still in the fort?

>> No.22312166

>>22312111
THAT'S THIRTY THOUSAND POUNDS EXPLOSIVES.

RUNNING WILL DO NOTHING.

>> No.22312167

>>22312134
Just run away!!!

Running bomb tech (pilot in this case) outranks everybody!!

>> No.22312169

>>22312111
OH SHIT IS THIS ONE OF THOSE APHRODITE B-17'S?

>> No.22312171

>Operation Aphrodite B-17s
>Mission 515: Pilot Lt. Fain Pool and autopilot engineer "S. Sgt. Philip Enterline" successfully parachuted, and the drone spun out of control.
> Lt. Fain Pool
>Pain Fool

Someone *has* to be taking the piss there.

>> No.22312174

>>22312134
GRAB MINNA AND SANYA AND RUUUUUUUUUUUN

>> No.22312175

>>22312137
>operation Aphrodite
OH GOD ITS ALTERNATIVE 5, THE FUTURE REFUSED TO CHANGE, RUN NIGGA

>> No.22312179

>>22312134

SLING MINA OVERSHOULDER, GRAB SANYA AND RUNNNN

>> No.22312184

>>22312134
RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!

>> No.22312189

>>22312134
OH SHIT SANYA

>> No.22312202

>>22312134
Get Minna to get a fix on Sanya, if she's clear and running, then start running ourselves.

>> No.22312203

>>22312134
CRAZY IVAN
TIME TO GET THE FUCK OUTTA THERE

>> No.22312204

>>22312134

SCREAM AT SANYA TO KEEP RUNNING

>> No.22312208

>>22312134
get Sanya and Minna and get the fuck out of dodge

>> No.22312218

>>22312137
>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Aphrodite
Oh shit...
Yeah I'm going with grab Sanya (if she ran to us) or Minna and get the fuck outta here.

>> No.22312222

>Inb4 this guy is JFK's brother who got killed in an Aphrodite test

>> No.22312237

>>22312222
my god the kennedy's were cursed

>> No.22312257

That thing is packing between 16000 to 34000 pounds of high explosives...

Sweet mother of Christ.

>> No.22312280

>>22312257
that's overkill!

>> No.22312282

>>22312257
We're all dead anyways. No point running. Let's just bask in the warmth of fiery doom.

>> No.22312285

You and Minna exchange a glance.

And then you run like hell.

The pilot of the B-17 is right on your heels as you sprint for the waiting RAF jeep, where Sanya and the bored airman are waiting for you. You reach the jeep and brace yourself on the hood, panting, as Minna turns and leans casually against the side to address the newcomer.

"So what's-"

"RUUUUN!" he screams, flinging Luuchini into the back of the Jeep like a sack of potatoes. He shoulder-tackles Minna, knocking her into the Jeep on top of Luuchini, then seizes you and flings you into the passenger seat before jumping right into the RAF man's lap and assuming direct control.

"YEAAAAHAARRRF" he screams incoherently, and throws the vehicle into drive.

And then, he drives.

Sweet Jesus Christ does he drive.

>> No.22312286

>>22312134
they dead
FUCKING GO FULL GNOME YOUNG

>> No.22312292

>>22312134
It might be too late, but sling Minna over shoulder and tell her to "SHIELD EVERYTHING" while we run.

>> No.22312307

>>22312257
>Late in World War II, at least 25 B-17s were fitted with radio controls to be used as drones designated BQ-7 missiles, constructed under the auspices of Operation Aphrodite. Loaded with up to 20,000 lb (9,070 kg) of Torpex high explosive and enough fuel for a range of 350 mi (563 km) they were used to attack U-boat pens, V-1 missile sites, and other bomb-resistant fortifications.

>20,000 lb (9,070 kg) of Torpex high explosive

mother of fucking god

>> No.22312309

>>22312285
ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL
this hurts you Jeep

also, why the mass effect joke?

>> No.22312311

seriously thought, which hare-brained fucker thought this might have been a remotely good idea?

>> No.22312316

>>22312222
Kennedy was flying a converted B-24, in a B-17

>> No.22312331

>>22312307
>bomb-resistant fortifications

...like Barin?

>> No.22312335

>>22312285
beepbeepimajeep.png

>> No.22312337

>>22312307
that's overkill, even for a pillowfort.

>>22312311
According the Wiki page, perhaps Gen Arnold.

>> No.22312356

>>22312257
Mission 515: One plane lost control after the first crewman bailed out, and crashed near Orford, making a huge crater and destroying more than 2 acres (8,000 sq m) of the surrounding countryside; the second crewman was killed. The view from the nose of the other drone was obscured as it came over the target, and it missed by several hundred feet. (Alternate sources claim 1 hit 1,500 feet short & 1 was shot down,[10]:32 and that 1 drone crashed killing 1 crew of 2 men).[11]


I don't think we're going to get far enough away...

>> No.22312363

>>22312331
OH FUCK
SOMEONE REALLY WANTS US FUCKING DEAD

>> No.22312390

The young Air Force pilot takes that Jeep through several curves so tight the overloaded vehicle balances on two wheels for a time as he guns it for Eddington Strip. He spots a sunken lane running along the edge of a farm field, and so, after going up the path only a hundred or so feet, takes the jeep straight through the farmer's wooden fence. Still wearing fence-planks on the grille, he guns it into the slightly-sunken road and hits the brakes, parking the Jeep behind a low wall.

"WHAT'S HAPPENING" Sanya asks.

That's about when the world ends.

The ground shakes violently as the earth seems to split apart, your ears being rent by a titanic blast. A moment later a shockwave of air blasts into the low stone wall. It's top is almost even with your head, and you're flipped clean out of the goddamn Jeep, landing on the ground. In the air above you a wave of debris flies over; dirt, stone, a small dog, a mailbox, and lots and lots of little splintery things that might once have been larger objects. The typically dreary English day is lit by a fireball that outshines the Sun, and you can feel the concussive blast rattling in you, THROUGH you, making you but a spec against the amazing wrath of God as He unleashes his fury against the earth.

>> No.22312405

>>22312390

Kiss the pilot.

This is the only thing that makes sense now.

>> No.22312414

>>22312390
HOLY FUCK

>> No.22312422

>>22312390
don thy aviators.

>> No.22312427

>>22312390
oh god, Marian invasions inbound. its not as bad as a MOAB, but fuck, this is a fucking powerful explosive.

>> No.22312437

>>22312390
>The typically dreary English day is lit by a fireball that outshines the Sun, and you can feel the concussive blast rattling in you, THROUGH you, making you but a spec against the amazing wrath of God as He unleashes his fury against the earth.


Dear god, it's almost like a nuke.

>> No.22312444

>>22312405
>>22312390
Give Minna Oh my god we're alive kiss.

Then kiss pilot

>> No.22312464

>>22312427
>Implying martians aren't watching this and going

"Fuck... That.... Shit..."

>> No.22312468

>>22312437
Oh we have made modern day things better than this, the MOAB and the Russian FOAB, because sometimes you need nuclear firepower without E=MC^2

>> No.22312496

>>22312437
DUDE
IT'S 20,000IB'S OF TORPEX
THAT SHIT'S 50% MORE POWERFUL THAN TNT

THIS IS THE SHIT THEY USE TO KILL BATTLESHIPS
AND THE MARK 13 DROPPED BY TBF AVENGERS ONLY HAD 600IB'S OF IT

>> No.22312547

And then there's silence.

Aside from the sounds of debris, some of it quite big and heavy, coming down all over the place, it's silent.

On your back, staring into the sky, you see a towering blast-cloud, curling up in the shape of a gigantic mushroom. The overcast at 3,000 feet has actually been blown away, however temporarily, and into the void the darker cloud of blast-debris and dirt is blossoming.

"Eeeee," you manage.

"Mein Gott!" Minna stammers.

"What the FUCK was that!?" you scream, looking at the Air Force Pilot. "What the FUCK!?"

"Aphrodite project," he tells you. "Filled it with explosives, use it as a drone bomber."

"What kind of PSYCHOTIC FUCK would do such a thing!?" you stammer.

The pilot adjusts his English flight-cap, and grabs your hand and pumps it in a firm handshake, grinning from ear to ear.

"Name's Joe Kennedy."

>> No.22312556

>>22312285
>>22312536
>no mention of Yoshika
OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK

>> No.22312567

Page 10. Someone Archive before its too late!

>> No.22312569

>>22312556
Yoshika wasn't with us. It was just Young and Minna.

>> No.22312576

>>22312547
CALLED IT
I FUCKING CALLED IT

>> No.22312581

First rule of any Armed Forces.

Sprinting EOD/Pilot outranks everybody.

>> No.22312592

>>22312547
>Joe Kennedy
GOD DAMN KENNEDYS! DOING THIS KIND OF SHIT WILL GET YOU KILLED!

>> No.22312596

>>22312437

I shit you not, it is. There's a similar weapon that was used by the Germans, in IL-2 it actually makes a mushroom cloud. I looked up some youtube to see if conventional explosives of sufficient power could do that.

And they do.

Holy shit, they do.

>> No.22312606

>inb4 NEXT TIME

>> No.22312608

>>22312596
archive!!

>> No.22312618

>>22312547
>Joe Kennedy

Immediately punch him in the mouth. Him volunteering for this shit (and ultimately getting killed) so he could upstage his brother did the world a favor.

>> No.22312629

>>22312596
Any high power explosive does this Planefag, fuck, you can do it with mining explosives. You should youtube mine explosions and MOAB tests, its fun to watch mushroom clouds, its just a physics application, there is a really long calculus proof of this.

>> No.22312656

>>22312629

Yeah, it's just the way the air is moved as the explosion happens. Ground underneath it forces force in X direction, nothing too complex, really.

>> No.22312672

>>22312547
"Sir, I have to say. You nearly ended my life, my girlfriend's life, and the lives of adorable child soldiers, but you sure as hell know how to make an entrance.

You, sir, are NOT smalltime."

>> No.22312679

NEXT TIME ON STRIKE WITCHES: A WITCH MADE FOR RADIO!

STRIKE WITCHES will resume on FRIDAY, Dec. 4th. BE THERE.

>> No.22312692

>>22312679
Thats a long fucking wait there baka

>> No.22312697

>>22312679
January.

>> No.22312698

>>22312679
>dec 4th

See yall in a year I guess

>> No.22312700

>>22312679

WE'RE GOING BACK IN TIME WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

PLANEFAG IS THE BEST

(nigga, it's Jan 4)

>> No.22312704

>>22312679
A whole year?
Shit.

>> No.22312705

>>22312679

>11 months for SWQ

VADER NOOOOOOO.jpg

>> No.22312711

AFTER-THREAD WRITEFAGS - you may want to post on Tofusaur.us and link it here. Sorry, I really should have made a second thread to reap all those reaction-images when people realized what kind of B-17 had just crashed.

>> No.22312716

>>22312679
I don't want to wait until next year.

>> No.22312721

>>22312679
Now to wait until friday to see how things conclude

Nice thread as it's actually like old times, truly funny hijinks, progress, etc.

>> No.22312722

>>22312679
>>22312692
>>22312698
>>22312700
>>22312705
>>22312704
The worst part is we would all wait.

>> No.22312725

>>22312679
MOTHERFUCKER....

December 4th falls on a wednesday

>> No.22312727

>>22312679
>Dec 4th
PLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANEFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG

>> No.22312731

>>22312700
>>22312704
>>22312705
>>22312697

OKAY FINE

JANUARY

it's not like I like you or anything

baka

>> No.22312737

>>22312722
Sadly you're right.

>> No.22312742

>>22312731
iloveyoutoo

>> No.22312751

>>22312722
I'll wait for you forever planefag...

>> No.22312752

>>22312679
THREAD END MUSIC
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6kYPqm0il4c

>> No.22312753

Technically I should have an archive out today, but I've been sick as fuck and haven't gotten a chance to get everything ready.

I'll have it ready for whenever the fuck Crimson runs since Deme decided to run on the same day AGAIN and that turned out terribly for me last time.

>> No.22312763

Alright, were done here.

Fuck yall! I'm off for sleep!

>> No.22312797

>>22312731
nohomo

>> No.22312798

>>22312752
> Humikane Shimada funds a SWQ spinoff

>> No.22312965

So...hey guys.

Anyways, we're about to fall off Page Ten, so I'll cut it short: here is the pastebin for the newest chapter of Prune Barge Shuffle: http://pastebin.com/9XvKq1LH

And here is the Tofusaur.us thread where I post it (and where I will post this new chapter immediately afterwards): http://tofusaur.us/res/4332.html

Hopefully next time I'll be able to post the chapter wholesale. But! If you liked Mack in his appearance here, why not check him out in his original story?

>> No.22313025

Been reading the old threads again, did we gnome our brain back together after that spider bot stabbed us?

>>
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