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[ERROR] No.21954396 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

The next game will apparently be following the same time-line after a time-skip.
And I was thinking of having my new PC be the child of my old one. Except, that he lives alone.

But I was just thinking that all my old PC would have to do would be
1. Jerk off and store some semen
2. Polymorph self (female)
3. Impregnate oneself
4. Birth the new PC, and be a loving and caring fa--...mother.

Is this too creepy, or would it be ok?

>> No.21954412

>> No.21954431

>>21954396

Why not just create the new PC as a slow-growing clone?

>> No.21954441

>> No.21954442

You know that Ronald McDonald picture with him holding a book, saying what the fuck did I just read? If I had it on my phone I would post that.

Serious answer, that is horrifying but funny. If you do this you need to give your new pc some weird quirks like he/she thinks gender is a choice and has no sense of difference about it if you know what I mean.

>> No.21954473

>> No.21954481

>>21954442
I thought I had you covered, anon, but guess I lost the pic. Spiderman shall have to suffice.

>> No.21954484

All of those are too creepy.
Just play the same character, but better.

>> No.21954499

>>21954396
>>21954396

Do it, OP. But make sure your old PC turned himself into his own sexual fantasy, and now looks like an elf slut or something similar. Whenever your new PC comes home, "mom" is always wearing only an apron, or kinky lingerie, or S&M bondage outfits.

>> No.21954508

>>21954484
Lichdom never works out in the long run.

>> No.21954537

But WHY would your character do this? Why not summon something sexy or gate something and fuck it?

Also, better option is to use clone and polymorph to make an opposite sex clone of yourself.

>> No.21954616

>>21954537
1. If you fuck something else, your child will share its DNA.
2. Can you truly trust your own clone?

Besides, he would probably be a great mother. And did in fact frequently craft magical toys, and did he was well liked by children when he had to take care of them before.
Though granted that he is quite weird, that was established a long time ago in our early games. That said, he is an earnest and sincere person of a good heart.

>> No.21954631

>>21954616

note

>>21954499

>> No.21954685

>>21954499
>>21954631
I imagine that it would at first end up as >>21954616.
But as time passes you would get picture related.

Though, you would probably get an the apron with either one of them.
That said, nothing lewd at home. That's a child friendly environment, disregarding the dangerous potions, spells, and monsters.

>> No.21954732

Fuckin' wizards, man. Fuckin' wizards.

I'll bet this is how Eliminster will turn out.

>> No.21954734

>>21954685
>But as time passes you would get picture related.

What kind of shit-tier wizard won't stay young and sexy for the duration of their life (and possibly beyond)?

Now you're just trolling

>> No.21954750

>>21954616
>trust my own clone
With my life. Heck, I'd set myself up for mass production, for the orgies alone.

But >>21954499 is also great.

>> No.21954757

>>21954442
>Serious answer, that is horrifying but funny. If you do this you need to give your new pc some weird quirks like he/she thinks gender is a choice and has no sense of difference about it if you know what I mean.
Also, yes. This would indeed be the case. It would make my new PC slightly odd.

My old PC would be a caring parent, so my new PC should probably end up relatively ok.
But the weird circumstances regarding the birth and childhood of this person, would probably make my new PC a bit odd at places. Like my old PC, albeit with different quirks.

That kind of non-conventional thought is the family's way of aligning and relating to the magical side of the world. A state of mind where you don't take things for granted.

>> No.21954761

Why impregnate yourself?

Turn into a woman and rape your BBEG

Be the prophesied child.

>> No.21954778

>>21954396
>mfw this thread.

>> No.21954779

You'd need a method of delivery for the seed, like, a well-endowed golem that you can equip with vials of semen. A relentless breeding machine which has its power core replenished by absorbing sexual energies

>> No.21954818

>>21954757
>old PC has a wand of gender change
>swaps genders like clothes. likes to cook as a woman, switches to male to do yard work, then back to female to laze around
>when hir kid asks how s/he does it, s/he makes hir a wand of hir own
>new PC's spent about as much time as a man as a woman, thinks everyone has too

This could go really well, or really, REALLY badly. There is no middle ground.

>> No.21954825

>>21954734
>What kind of shit-tier wizard won't stay young and sexy for the duration of their life (and possibly beyond)?
My old PC. Despite the looks, he would most likely make sure to stay energetic and strong.
But nothing does the trick better than to look the part, but having more to it than expected.

But seriously. My guy had some kind of philosophy where he admired "the flow" of things, including the passage of time.
He would make sure that he would eventually look old, because he would expect himself to look old. He would probably make do very well though compared to non-magic senior citizens.

But it would primarily be to grow old as the child and the rest of the world grows older.
In fact, if I were to go through with this whole idea, he would make himself younger as he changed his sex. He is already an old man. Then he would become a young woman. Then an old granny. And if I know my own PC right, he would probably end up as a young boy afterwards.

>> No.21954846

>>21954818
>hir

stop it

>> No.21954889

>>21954779
Make it secrete hormones and inject the victi-er, participant with aphrodisiacs as well

Want to make sure the pregnancy takes, after all

>> No.21954891

>>21954846
I'm too lazy to type his/her over and over again. Political correctness can suck a dick.

>> No.21954903

>>21954889
Oh, and of course it will have to be able to detect when she's at peak ovulation, for maximum effectiveness.

>> No.21954987

>>21954903
In addition, the golem should act in a primal nature, taking the wizard by force and surprise, thus ensuring a more realistic mating

>> No.21954992

>>21954779
>>21954889
>>21954903
As intriguing as the sex/impregnation golem sounds, that stuff would most likely take place off-screen during the time-skip.

Though I hadn't thought of making a golem. I know it sounds creepy (I am getting the feeling you are trying to be creepy), but really, that sounds sort of fun. Possibly, in a quirky way, if it's not too creepy.

As I said, it would all have been happening off-screen with practically no mention to it.
But I guess that I could kind of imagine an off-line golem of questionable function, as a prop in the dusty storage room of dated things and trinkets.
I could imagine a future exploration of the old warehouse in a later session with all the new PCs, finding and unveiling the golem with no idea of it ever having been there, could end in a slight laugh or two. I like to believe that my group is mature enough to handle it. So I will consider it.

>> No.21955000

>>21954903
Or, you know, just make a 'female' golem -or a golem with an 'ass' to fuck- senseless until it's pretty full, then switch both your gender and the golem's 'gender' to empty it.

If you make a good enough golem, the golem could be "Dad" to the kid. And the next time around, it could be "Mom" and so on.

>> No.21955020

>>21954992
>too creepy
In my experience, only wierd people complain about things being creepy.

>> No.21955027

>>21954992
>Though I hadn't thought of making a golem. I know it sounds creepy (I am getting the feeling you are trying to be creepy)

Rule of thumb: /tg/ is where /d/ goes when they're done fappin. And /d/ comes over for the monstergirls and threads exactly like this.

>> No.21955035

>>21954396
I dunno man, ask your GM about it.

>> No.21955046

>>21954992
>an off-line golem of questionable function, as a prop in the dusty storage room of dated things and trinkets.

>fuck em and leave em

Whore

>> No.21955075

>>21954992
Creepy is an incidental byproduct of my raging boner

>> No.21955077

Have you considered having your PC instead carefully craft a biological body basedon his own, design a flesh golem capable of bearing it as a child, and then projecting his mind into it, possibly using some kind of mind sculpting spell to make it effectively a reincarnate? He could be reborn as his own daughter, vaguely remembering her old existence but with a whole new perspective on life and effectively starting over.

>> No.21955079

>>21955020
>>21955027
Yeah, I know.
My stance on the matter though is pretty much this. I am quite pro-creepy, kind of. I wouldn't even have had this self-father/mother idea otherwise.
However, explicit creepy, and just references of creepy, are two very different things.

Not too much against the creepy part itself. But if you make things explicit it affects the atmosphere in a whole different manner, and then you might as well be playing an ERPG.

>> No.21955109

>>21954396
>Is this too creepy, or would it be ok?

>> No.21955115

>>21955079
How the mechanics work and how you present them at the table are two different things.

That one quest in Knights of the Old Republic is certainly a creepy reference, but it's not impossible to see someone thinking out the explicitly creepy parts.

All anyone would need to know is that this kid's 'mom' looks oddly familiar and has a 'dad' golem. We're really the only ones that need to know the rest.

>> No.21955122

>>21955077
Yes, I did consider something like that. It's probably what I am going to do unless I do this.

It mostly comes down to how I believe I can balance the creepy-ness/humour of the idea.
Creepy is fine, kind of, but I prefer it to be for the sake of a humorous atmosphere. If that atmosphere fails to form, then I would probably go for something less creepy or something with a better creepy/humour ratio.

>> No.21955143

Hmmm, OP, would you be willing to listen to an imaginary scenario, somewhat related?

>> No.21955144

>>21955079
Only give them details as they become relivant, then. Like say, if the party meets the cumgolem, don't come out and say what it does; just say it's equiped to carry and disperse liquids, without discribing just HOW it disperses them. Have it be watering the garden when they first see it. They'll think it's just a gardenerbot with a built in watering can, untill they realize that the spout is it's penis.

>> No.21955157

>>21955115
>All anyone would need to know is that this kid's 'mom' looks oddly familiar and has a 'dad' golem. We're really the only ones that need to know the rest.
Indeed. If they would pry on the subject of what kind of golem it was (granted I run with the golem idea), it would be described as of being of "questionable purpose" and with other relatively vague terms, with the implications that we all knows ends in a child. But that would be around the level where things would be at.
They can imagine the rest themselves.

>> No.21955177

>>21955144
That sounds like a good approach. I like your way of thinking.

>> No.21955212

>>21955157
Right. That works.

Point is, the rest of the creepy stuff is why we like these threads.

>> No.21955243

>>21955143

OP?

>> No.21955249

>>21954779
>>21954889
>>21954903
>>21954987
elegan/tg/entlewoman here, I can't believe how horny this has made me. Fucking breeding fetish, if only pregnancy wasn't such a pain in the ass in real life.

>> No.21955277

>>21955243
>>21955143
Go ahead and post whatever you want. If it's similar in nature, then sure.
The thread can probably handle it.

>> No.21955281

>>21955157
Just have your wizard be oddly affectionate and clingy with the golem

>> No.21955326

>>21954779
But wait, if it's drawing power from sexual energy, wouldn't that deplete the seed? We can't allow the golem to deminish it's potency!

>> No.21955334

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/rods.htm#wonder

>> No.21955342

>>21955277

Right. So, if we pretend that the other players in the campaign wouldn't object/would be cool with whatever you did, would you think your old character gathering the old PC group for one last celebration, then subly adding something to the food and wine which makes the other characters begin to shrink and de-age, eventually turning into babies (girls if you feel extra weird) would be fitting? Your character could then carry his former companions to a pre-selected childless host family, put the basket on the doorstep before using the same substance on himself, shrinking into another child and crawling into the basket before using his/her last ounce of magic to knock on the door. As a sort of "last old adventure" but "glorious new adventure"? I'm reasoning that your PC would see this as a huge favor he'd be doing the others, not as something bad.

>> No.21955353

>>21955281
>Just have your wizard be oddly affectionate and clingy with the golem
Obviously. No but seriously, good idea.
I am growing more and more attached to this idea, honestly. >>21955077 is a decent alternative, but this sounds like it has more potential for fun.

I guess it has a higher risk of failing as well, but the potential might make that an fair risk to take.

>> No.21955355

>>21955326
sexual energy ie the friction and heat of coitus, the power of emotion, etc

>> No.21955368 [SPOILER] 

>>21955342
>de-aging
You know, I don't think reversing age is actualy possible for most wizards.
However, I have a solution!

>> No.21955394

>>21955342
why is it I find this far creepier than the self-cest fuck robot?

>> No.21955396

>>21955249

>> No.21955461

>>21955353
Give the golem a pet name, too, that only she calls it, as well as stuff like "dear, honey, sweetheart"

>> No.21955502

>>21954396

Weak OP. You should build a golem mom and dad, have them carry your clone-child to term, then have your old PC turn himself into a cute young girl to watch over your new PC, perhaps even romance him once they're old enough.

>> No.21955531

This golem thing only works if it gains a soul through the power of loooooove

>> No.21955560

>>21955342
Alright. Well, de-aging is a tough one to crack, but possible within our setting.
As it directly affects the others though, they would have to give their ok to the premise beforehand.

However, to be perfectly honest, that's not too far away from in character.
Not really sure about the whole baby thing though. Living their life anew wouldn't be too bad, but that should still be their choice. As fickle as my character have been, he probably wouldn't mess someone up long term against their will.

However, he could do something like doing exactly just that (He would likely even eat the same food himself just for fun), but make it so that it's just temporary. Or more to the point, fulfil condition(s) X within the time-span of Y before Z, to break enchantment or else permanent.
Something like that kind of feels perfectly in character.

Alternatively, if the de-aging thing would be hard to achieve or otherwise disregarded (the de-aging thing would probably be possible just for as long as the others were cool with it), I assume one could always run a Thumbelina-ish session. With the new PCs taking care of the old PCs.
No matter the case, babies in baskets or old cameo PCs tiny as buttons both sounds like very cute ideas.
And if I were to run on my condition to break the enchantment thing, I am betting the others would have no problem with it. A game should be challenging, but you have to have good enough spirits and confidence to expect yourself to win! And in either case, the condition thing kind of introduces an element of choice.

Good going anon, you gave us a plot for a session(s) that I think the others could enjoy.

>> No.21955590

>>21955560

Hmm, what's the party composition of your current PC's team? And how conducive are the players of those characters to "weird" fun?

>> No.21955609

/tg/ plays the best games.

>> No.21955650

>>21954396

If you're thinking of doing this so that you can play the same character again, there are two problems with that.

First, even if a child has identical parents, the child will not be identical. Very similar, surely, but not identical. It's like having two bowls, each with the same amount of M&Ms, with the same color distribution, and taking half at random from each, and putting them in a new bowl. Similar, but not identical.

Secondly, a great amount of who the PC is comes from that PC's upbringing. Nurture, as opposed to nature. Unless your PC grew up with a genderswapped mother and no father, and had the same life experiences, they'll surely end up very different. This is the reason identical twins often have varied personalities.

>> No.21955673

>>21955650
>If you're thinking of doing this so that you can play the same character again, there are two problems with that.

I don't think he is. He just has a quirky idea of what's a good character concept.

>> No.21955698

>>21955650
This is no reason to not turn yourself into a girl and build a fuck golem to impregnate yourself with your own semen, though

>> No.21955714

>>21955673

Well then, yeah, that's a little weird, but as long as it's done in an "engineering a way into a unique situation" way, and not a "this gives me an erection" way. But yeah, the child would most likely deviate from the original, especially in alignment, class, and mental attributes.

>> No.21955715

>>21955698
>This is no reason to not turn yourself into a girl and build a fuck golem to impregnate yourself with your own semen, though

THAT'S YOUR SOLUTION TO EVERYTHING, /TG/!

>> No.21955726

>>21955715
That's because it is the perfect plan

There is no problem it doesn't take care of

>> No.21955746

>>21955650
nothing in op post implied he wanted to play the same character over again. instead just having a connection to his last.
like when my character in one campaigned ended by ascending to godhood, then in a later campaign was a cleric of said former PC deity/

>> No.21955766

>>21955714

I don't think the dude said he wanted to play the same character. And yeah, he probably gets off on it, but as long as he plays it straight at the table, what does it matter? If he starts rubbing his cock during sessions, THEN it's a problem.

>> No.21955790

>>21955590
Well. We had a weaponsmith/warrior, an air-sailor/swordmaster, a beastmaster, and an Illusionist. I played a Wizard. (Might as well openly say that it's a modified Earthdawn setting, even though everyone naturally assumes D&D. What's important is that it's a fantasy setting much like D&D)

And they don't mind quirky games too much. We often alternate who is GMing, and no matter the case, I know that at least 2 of the others often have relatively quirky ideas themselves. And no matter the case, it has been my impression that the group at large enjoys our type of games.

>> No.21955839

>>21955698
I am going to get this phrase emblazoned on a plaque and hung over my mantlepiece, so that I may never forget it

>> No.21955858

>>21955650
>If you're thinking of doing this so that you can play the same character again, there are two problems with that.
Your reasoning is generally sound, and yeah, the child more than likely would not be the same. M&Ms and all.

You go the "if" wrong however, as others have already assumed you have.
My previous posts kind of touched on the subject as it mentioned various ways of upbringing and quirks like but unlike the father/mother etc.

They would be similar, but not so similar. Probably. It's no matter the case not my idea to play the same character again, and given the upbringing (my old PCs childhood wasn't quite fully as whacky), I am guessing that things would turn out quite different. Especially with that parent. I have other ideas for this PC.

>> No.21955872

>>21955790

Okay. Hmmm. Forget the baby thing, if you felt it was too out of character. New plan!

Your character invites the other old PC's together, tells them he wants them to play a game. He's prepared the game as you said, he will change the PC's and if they can't (or won't) accomplish X before time Y, the change will be permanent.

Of course, your PC has carefully prepared the scenario. As they all partake of the enchanted food/potion/whatever, they will each be transformed into something resembling an ideal of the character. For example, the air-sailor/swordmaster may find himself now a swashbuckling young pirate girl, and the beastmaster a savage jungle girl. Your PC then leads them to a pre-prepared house where their new identities can live for the duration as a team of friends/new adventurers. Of course, your PC would have prepared this scenario to see if some of them would like it so much they wouldn't want to go back.

>> No.21955933

>>21955872
Where does the golem come in

>> No.21955936

>>21955872
>tell them he wants to play a game
Alarm bells should be ringing in each of there minds right about now. The rogue is now planning to sneak attack once you far enough into your monolog to be considered flatfooted.

>> No.21955940

>>21955726

Tarrasque?

Lich?

Beholder?

>> No.21955943

>>21955502
That will have to be another game anon.
If my new PC ends up learning magic of the right kind, that might be something for the next game. If we get that far.

>> No.21956009

>>21955394
Because it involves doing things to other people.

>> No.21956018

>>21955872
That sounds lovely. Might have to tweak the initial catalyst to the party's enchantment somehow, but that sounds nice.
I liked the previous ideas too though. But this is all great.

Might run with either one of them depending on our games go, how/when it might be suitable, and the given state of the other players at the time. But this sounds good.

Settings with powerful magic are fun because you have the potential to do carry out ideas like these.

>> No.21956056

>>21956018

you honestly play in a game where the other players wouldn't mind having their characters turned into girls?

>> No.21956072

>>21955940
Knock it out via controled allip + unseen servant combo, load golem with tarrasque semen to birth the ubermensch.

Make the lich into a golem, allowing him to get laid again. Instant conversion to Good, and your kid gets free magic lessions from an epic-level mage.

Make a golem that's PERFECTLY identical to the beholder, watch as a romcom-esque relationship blooms between them. Syphon semen out of the golem on occation to breed a race of perfectly identical beholders, allowing them to form a society instead of ragekilling any other beholder they see.

It solves EVERYTHING.

>> No.21956080

>>21956018
>Might run with either one of them depending on our games go, how/when it might be suitable, and the given state of the other players at the time. But this sounds good.

If you can get the other players on board, have the new PC's meet the old PC's without knowing they're not what they appear to be at the time. Get some roleplaying happening between the "cute young" girl adventure group and the new PC's. Maybe even make the requisite(s) for the "game" be something involving the new PC's?

>> No.21956132

Just...

oh dear...

this whole thread.

It's just so beautiful. You have truly magnificent ideas OP, untarnished by the taint of fetish satisfaction.

>> No.21956167

>> No.21956183

>>21956072
I am grinning from ear to ear right now.

>> No.21956297

>>21956018
>>21955872
If we are speaking idolized forms of themselves though, I kind of wonder what would happen to the weaponsmith. I have ideas of what he might think, but that would be...
Especially if the enchantments are to lean towards happy-ish ideals. Makes me wonder how a more blissful and less worn down version of picture related might be. I have a hard time imagining picture related for the story though, especially since it implies a power boost. Perhaps he would just grow taller (gain a tan and a white beard).

>>21956056
Well, sort of. Kind of. I mean, if it's temporary I honestly doubt they would have much against it. And (if it's temporary) I could imagine the idea embraced.
I am not so sure if the enchantment should by concept turn everyone everyone female though, I believe it would be more mysterious/magical/in character if the enchantment was crafted to relate to their PCs character, in terms of how they are affected.

But seriously, the whole girl thing is probably not so dumb. I mean, for the swordmaster in particular it's like a case in gold. I believe the player would get laughs out of the situations as well.
He always speaks of the fair maidens of great valour. The idea of his very own PC being turned one of these fair maidens of great valour, while in surreal magical game of adventure, feels like it could really work.

All in all, if the enchantment/transformations would just manage to set the right tone, then sure. Also, the premise would most likely be discussed lightly beforehand, without spoiling anything too major. We hint/lightly discuss upcoming premises as standard procedure so that no one gets an unexpected frown from a sudden but albeit planned direction of the game.

>> No.21956341

>>21956072
>sex-golem lich

>> No.21956342

>>21956297
>grow taller
And his clothes would a couple of sizes too small.

>> No.21956403

>>21956297
>If we are speaking idolized forms of themselves though, I kind of wonder what would happen to the weaponsmith. I have ideas of what he might think, but that would be...
>Especially if the enchantments are to lean towards happy-ish ideals. Makes me wonder how a more blissful and less worn down version of picture related might be. I have a hard time imagining picture related for the story though, especially since it implies a power boost. Perhaps he would just grow taller (gain a tan and a white beard).

Perhaps a perfectly crafted golem woman, utterly perfect down to the very last detail? Something like becoming the ultimate masterpiece he could ever hope to craft himself?

>But seriously, the whole girl thing is probably not so dumb. I mean, for the swordmaster in particular it's like a case in gold. I believe the player would get laughs out of the situations as well.
He always speaks of the fair maidens of great valour. The idea of his very own PC being turned one of these fair maidens of great valour, while in surreal magical game of adventure, feels like it could really work.

That was exactly my thought. While it would definitely be up for discussion, and it would make it more fun if there was a slight mix of sexes, the idea would be to shake the PC's (if not the players) up by putting them in the shoes of a truly unfamiliar form, then challenge them to act as if it was totally natural.

I mean, I can imagine now your PC setting up an empty warehouse as a temporary adventuring company, or maybe just an inn or merchant house. Each transformed PC would then get a job at this place, sort of like getting an NPC sheet instruction and be challenged to make it come to life.

Hell, if the players are okay with it, you could even have individual goals for each PC. For example, a PC who is staying male could get a challenge to get an honest, non-forced kiss from one of the males-turned-female.

>> No.21956412

>>21956403

Of course, the danger would be that the PC's might like this TOO much and not actually wish to return. One, two or even all of them. Might want to plan for such an outcome as well, even if unlikely.

>> No.21956461

>>21956412
Why would that be a problem?

>> No.21956466

>>21956132
>It's just so beautiful. You have truly magnificent ideas OP, untarnished by the taint of fetish satisfaction.
I imagined that the OP was a good way to start the thread. Get everyone in line when it comes to quirky/weird thinking, giving me something to work with.
I believe I made a good choice. With the level of everything being far out there and creepy, things can either be taken at face value or brought down to a level easier to work with. In either case I believe it's easier than the other way around. Also, more fun.

>>21956080
And yes, this sounds like a good idea. And yes, the idea was that all while the enchanted would primarily affect the older PCs, its resolution, the main quest, and the conclusion of the "game", would primarily depend on the new PCs.

It would be a new PCs meet old PCs after all, and not the other way around. The old PCs will already have retired their main character status.

>> No.21956514

>>21954396
OP i recommend you read up on Zeus(the Greek God) he does this a few times

>> No.21956568

>>21956412
>Of course, the danger would be that the PC's might like this TOO much and not actually wish to return. One, two or even all of them. Might want to plan for such an outcome as well, even if unlikely.
To be fair. That was well within my calculations. And to be fair, I could honestly imagine either case of them all being turned back, none of them being turned back, or anything in between.
I would assume that the final judgement on whether or not they would revoke the enchantment, would depend on how the "game" plays out in practice, and how the impressions/experience affects the old PCs. Depending on how successful our combined group of old/new PCs, the experience for the various parties involved, may vary widely.

Though if I were to guess, I would imagine the case of either all revoking the enchantment, or everyone but one or two revoking it. With the other outcomes being possible, but less likely. And as I said, how things plays out in practice would probably matter a lot.
No matter how it resolves though, enchantments revoked or not, I can see it being great fun.

>> No.21956693

>>21956403
You seem to have caught the gist/atmosphere of our games quite well.
But yes, these are all great ideas. Really makes me wonder how things might turn out.

Though I kind of need to decide on what areas of expertise my new PC might branch into. And how far it might differ from my old one. I could imagine my new PC going into an entirely different branch of magic, or even in large part disregarding magic altogether. Going into the same branch of magic, but subbing a different sub-skillset. Or maining a completely non-magical skillset and sub magic, which would be pretty much the opposite of my old PC.

But yes. This thread has made me quite fond of the idea. My old PC is more than likely going to birth his own child. And that child is going to grow up into a cool fella.

>> No.21956790

>>21956403
>Perhaps a perfectly crafted golem woman, utterly perfect down to the very last detail? Something like becoming the ultimate masterpiece he could ever hope to craft himself?
Pygmalion called, he'd like his schtick back. And another block of ivory, at least eight inches long and cylindrical. She feels like being kinky tonight.

>> No.21956834

>>21956403
Missed the entire first paragraph somehow. But shortly put, yeah. The easiest and probably most amusing way to deal with the smith would be to turn him into something related to what he wants to make.

>> No.21957105

Guys, we've all forgotten something importaint.
Would a sexgolem really make for a good father?
>nigntedo innocence
Astute as always, captcha.

>> No.21957145

>>21956693
Fella, or "fella"?

>>21956834
Like a sword!

>>21957105
No, of course not, which is why the child ends up a little peculiar.

>> No.21957173

>>21957105
What kind of golem would end up a good father?

>> No.21957686

>>21957173
I feel like this is a lead in to a terrible joke.

>> No.21957761

>undergo pregnancy yourself
>not polymorphing a bunch of peasants to look like your female self
>not starting up a breeding farm
It's like you don't even have the same fetishes I do, /tg/.

>> No.21957779

>>21957686

I googled a list of every D&D golem but I couldn't think of good pun for a single one of them

On a side note, OPs golem should be an equine golem because reasons.

>> No.21957825

>>21957145
>Like a sword!

Blacksmith character ends up as talking magical sword, bequeathed to the new character of the same player.

>> No.21957955

>>21957779
>golem 6b
Now then will always be a small girl in his garden.

>> No.21957987

>>21957955
YES.
BEST POSSIBLE FATHER.

>> No.21958021

>>21957825
>Blacksmith character ends up as talking magical sword, bequeathed to the new character of the same player.
That is so simple, classic, yet so perfect.


That said, I do say that this thread has been quite successful.
I am going to try to get some shut-eye before the sun rises, but if this thread is still here tomorrow I would naturally check it out. Picture arguably sort of related.

>> No.21958036

>>21958021
>that pic
>that obvious boner
Why did you have to put that in my head.

>> No.21958082

>>21958036
That manga never ceases to make me laugh.

>> No.21958143

>>21958036
>why'd you have to put that (boner) in my head
Implying skullfucking? Man, this thread covers all the bases!

>> No.21958224

>>21957825
>The now-saipiant sword, blessed with a master's knowledge of smithcraft and metallurgy, nags his wielder all the time for a good oiling and polish after sharpening, constantly urging his son to keep him in perfect condition.
His blade is his "blade", if you know what I mean.I mean penis.
Getting polished is effectivly a handjob for him, as is killing something.

>> No.21958663

Do you think high level wizards are inclined to be better or worse parents than the average man?

>> No.21960526

Somehow this thread is the perfect storm of /tg/ being /tg/. Though I can't help but laugh at the impregnation golem, perhaps because Voltaire's "Fully functional and anatomically correct" won't stop playing in my head.

>> No.21960822

After reading the mostly innocent direction this thread has taken I'd feel bad about doing the writefaggotry about the wizard and the sex golem.

>> No.21960828

>>21960822

You have very weird ideas of "innocent" dontcha anon?

>> No.21960845

>>21955249
>a pain in the ass
you mean a pain in the uterus

>> No.21960885

>>21960828
I believe the word is "jaded"?

>> No.21960891

>>21960885

"Cynical" maybe

>> No.21960895

>>21954396
well.... it is very likely that your next PC will have several defects since many genes will lack a backup pairing so if you are okay with a possibly retarded and defect PC then yes. And it isn't likely that he will be like your current PC.

>> No.21960938

I have seen the gates of 4chan, beyond which no straight eye may see. Behold, in Darkness >this thread sweeps the land. This is the 9th of December; the Year of Jesus Christ 2012. These are the closing days of the 3rd Era, and the final hours of my life.

>> No.21960959

>>21960895
Can one generation of self-cest really be that bad?

>> No.21961219

I really, honestly wish I had a group like yours, OP.

>> No.21961233

>>21954396

You would have to be awfully quick about it, I believe semen can only last outside of the body for about 30 seconds or so. How long is prep time for polymorph? I mean, you don't want to botch the job and accidentally polymorph your self with a vagina but no ovaries, and all of a sudden your just sticking semen inside of your self for no reason!

So here's what I'm thinking OP - chronomancer. You hire a chronomancer to send you back in time, you polymorph your self as a woman and have sex with your self, than go back forward in time. Use the chronomancers powers once more to speed grow the baby, pop it out, and bam there you go.

>> No.21961238

>>21961233
>You would have to be awfully quick about it, I believe semen can only last outside of the body for about 30 seconds or so.

I'm pretty sure Gentle Repose or a similar spell will let the semen stay fresh for an extended period.

>> No.21961243

>>21960959

nah, not unless you have a really specific genetic abnormality that will come about. Other wise it would take multiple generations of incest to see abnormalities. Not to mention, they would already have to be in the genepool to begin with.

So I mean, if you didn't have any fucked up genes what so ever, and you boned your sister and she had twins a boy and a girl, and they boned, and had twins, etc. etc. I don't think you would see too many problems.

>> No.21961252

>>21961238

gentle repose is only to prevent decay in dead creatures. Sperm, technically isn't dead, but...is it alive?

That seems so weird thinking about it now. Shit.

>> No.21961277

>>21961243
well the problem is that almost everyone do have malfunctioning genes. and incest is not really the same as impregnating yourself. True, for normal incest a couple of generations would have to pass for abnormalities to arise but that is only because their genes become more and more similar. With selfpregnancy you have already surpassed the limit of what eternal incest would lead to.

>> No.21961303

>>21961252
>gentle repose is only to prevent decay in dead creatures. Sperm, technically isn't dead, but...is it alive?
>That seems so weird thinking about it now. Shit.

Any type of spell that maintains organic matter for short amounts of time should be sufficient. I imagine the golem would be enchanted with it as part of its creation

>> No.21961308

>>21956790
>Pygmalion called, he'd like his schtick back. And another block of ivory, at least eight inches long and cylindrical. She feels like being kinky tonight.

No, I'm pretty sure Pygmalion didn't turn himself into a statue chick.

>> No.21961724

This thread is funny as hell

>> No.21962072

>>21954396

DO it. You'll be the god of neckbeards

>> No.21963085

I'm honestly curious to hear more about OP's shenanigans.

>> No.21963850

It turns out the thread is still here, that's impressive.

>>21963085
I am not quite sure of what to share really. I mean, I love Earthdawn and it's very likely my most favourite Fantasy TRPG by a wide margin and I would certainly recommend the game.
Aside from that I don't really know. Just try to keep an open mind to not make the games too stiff, and entertaining "shenanigans" might occur. But then again, I am betting the chemistry of the group is highly relevant for its execution.
Though that we often take turns GMing various sessions/stories, and promotes lightly discussing upcoming premises openly with the group before they are implemented might also be a contributing factor. I can imagine that kind of procedure to promote creativity in all the players involved as they all get some kind of influence in how the story progresses even beyond the acts of their PCs. And to discuss premises beforehand might make the games somewhat less stiff, by possibly remedying the tendency of tippy-toeing the stories in an overly "safe" manner as to not disappoint/offend anyone etc. You probably get what I mean.
But I am not sure what to share. I have made a couple of threads in the past, most of them haven't been as lewd as this though.

>>21961233
Spermbanks can do it, I am betting a wizard could.

>>21962072
>DO it. You'll be the god of neckbeards
I am betting you are referring to me in person. I still find this idea relatively amusing though, because the events transpiring to the birth of my new PC would be known to very few in the in-game world itself, and what's even more amusing is that my new PC's sense of "normality" would be unconventional to the point where my new PC quite possibly wouldn't see my old PC as the neckbeard king. Every wizard worth his salt should have a stout and well endowed neckbeard though.

>> No.21966603

>>21963850

I was honestly entertained by your idea, and hope you didn't just make all this up to tickle /tg/'s funnybone.

>> No.21966940

>>21963850
Looking up the source from your pic has so far explained nothing.

>> No.21967170

>>21966940
>Looking up the source from your pic has so far explained nothing.
It's not exactly related. The eccentric nature of the mom however, kind of suits the image of this idea. But it pretty much ends there.

>> No.21967235

>>21963850

I wish you the best with the idea, and hope you can use some of the other ones in the thread. As I said, I really wish I had a group as open-minded for weird/creepy fun as yours

>> No.21971166

Tell us how it all turns out.

>> No.21972758

I'm tempted to archive this thread and show it to Fenoxo...

>> No.21975986

>>21972758
It must be done! More content like this and less simple sex would get me playing CoC.

>> No.21978527

>genderswapping to get yourself pregnant
>not being true intersex and doing it without swapping

>> No.21978838

>>21978527
It's called being a hermaphrodite, libtard

>> No.21978884

>>21978527

>being a wizard
>actually doing something so boring

>> No.21978928

That's strange, I thought the blue background meant I left /d/ already...

>> No.21978943

>>21978838
If I said that people would think I was just trying to shoehorn futa into things, and I'm more right wing than you.

>>21978884
What's boring about both sexes at once?

>> No.21978976

>>21978943
Because WIZARDS. Seriously, you're dull.

Every wizard plot should be a fucking Rube-Goldberg machine.

>> No.21981308

>>21978976
How's that dull?!

>>
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