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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.21889478 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

>Capture a dragon
>Put it in prison
>It polymorphs into a guard and walks out

Fuck

>> No.21889509

I thought dragon polymorphs were limited to a single form in whatever new race they changed into, so that a dragon would always polymorph into the same dude.

>> No.21889520

>>21889509
Noooooooooope.

>> No.21889840

>>21889478
How the fuck did you not see that coming?

It's like you've never captured a dragon before.

>> No.21889982

>>21889840
>How the fuck did you not see that coming?

I'm not a wizard.

>> No.21890001

>Capture a dragon
>Put it in a prison
>It polymorphs into a guard and tries to walk out
>Hits the bars which are strong enough to contain a dragon and spaced close enough that he can't squeeze through as a human.

>> No.21890004

>>21889509
lots of stories involve that and it's not that rare of a house rule, but there's no limitation on it RAW

>> No.21890038

You deserve this anon for not having a prison with a permanent anti-magic field...

I hope you learned your lesson...

>> No.21890039

>Capture a dragon
>Put it in prison
>It uses its teleport at will ability to go elsewhere

Fuck

>> No.21890060

>>21890039
Most dragons don't have that.

>> No.21890062

>Party of level 10 Dumbasses with Prestige Classes in Moron capture me
>Toss me in a mortal prision
>HAHA, REALLY?.jpg
>Turn into guard
>HELP HELP! I'm being oppressed! Those assholes tossed me in here!
>They let me out, I walk out, party of morons gets arrested.
>Go back to hoard, fuck bitches, eat adventurers

All in all, been a pretty good day /tg/. Do they even Dragon Lore anymore?

>> No.21890093

>Trap dragon in prison
>Create anti-magic field
>Only visit for conjugal visits

>> No.21890106

>Capture a guard
>Put it in a dragon
>It polymorphs into a prison and walks out

Fuck

>> No.21890118

>>21890001
>dragon polymorphs into pixie
>whelp.

>> No.21890126

>>21890060
Bullshit.

>Teleport: The power of teleportation is another special, natural ability common to most "true" dragons. The Great Beast can teleport, at will, up to five miles (8 km) away. At the hatchling stage, the creature can only teleport himself, but an adult can teleport himself and two other beings (must be touching them) and up to 1000 pounds (450 kg) of equipment/loot. The percentage number in each description indicates the likelihood of being able to successfully activate and perform the teleportation. A failed roll means the teleport does not happen. The adult dragon can attempt a teleport once every melee round (every 15 seconds), but each attempt counts as a melee action and uses up one melee attack.

>> No.21890129

>Capture a dragon
>Cut off pieces until all it can do is talk.
>Lock it in a dark cell with only one opening thats basically some glorified airholes
>Wrap it in a shitload of chains
There done.

>> No.21890133

>Be dragon
>Be put in prison
>Idiot jailer left door slightly ajar
>Push on door to make it a jar.
>Pick up jar
>Use jar to knock out jailer
>Take keys
>Leave prison.

>> No.21890141

>>21889982

>> No.21890143

>>21890126
>>21890060

/tg/: We are willing to argue about the concrete specifics of imaginary creatures.

>Fuck you, a vampire doesn't work that way.

>> No.21890159

>Capture a dragon
>Visit it every night with fine wine and food
>Eventually seduce the dragon
>We walk out of the prison like the lovebirds we are

Get on my level.

>> No.21890165

>capture a dragon
>put it in prison
>chain it up and prevent it from casting
>court wizard polymorphs into a dragon and fucks her

FUCKING WIZARDS

>> No.21890168

>Build prison
>Imprison dragon
>Dragon burns down the prison because it was made of twigs

>> No.21890179

>>21890126
>all games and settings are D&D
Pretty sure Tolkien's dragons don't teleport.

>> No.21890185

>>21890143
Bullshit. Yes they do

>> No.21890198

>Capture a prison
>Put it into a dragon
>Chain prison into dragon
Everything went better than expected.

>> No.21890200

>>21890143

They sure as hell don't sparkle, at least. Sunlight needs to be a genuine threat, if just because it increases his chance of being caught (IIRC the original vampires weren't affected by sunlight, but stuck to feeding at night because it was much easier to avoid detection, and they had a bunch of more exploitable weaknesses, e.g. throwing seeds/rice at it would force it to count them all).

>> No.21890203

>Build dragon
>Put in prison
>Dragon dies of stomach rupture induced sepsis

>> No.21890210

>>21890165
Ok, I lol-ed.

>> No.21890212

>Capture the Princess
>Lock her away
>Carry dragon off into sunset

>> No.21890221

>>21890179
>if I don't know what something is, it must be D&D
Pretty sure dragons have been around before Tolkien.

>> No.21890225

>>21890200
>Sunlight needs to be a genuine threat
Naaah.

Blindsight

>inb4 autistic engineers

>> No.21890236

>>21890179
But D&D dragon can't automatically teleport unless they're a high enough level and take teleport as a spell.

I don't know what he was referencing...

>> No.21890237

>>21890221

>> No.21890253

>Capture a dragon
>Ride it into battle
FUCK YEAH!

>> No.21890257

>Enter with group into dragon's lair.
>Party finds dragon, prepares for epic battle.
>Bard rolls seduction and fucks the dragon right there.
>Bard Waifu has dragon lesbian lover. Wat do.

>> No.21890265

>>21890126
I'd like to know what system those dragons are from. Because 3.Xe D&D dragons don't have it. They can get it as a spell, but it's not an inherent ability.

>> No.21890268

>>21890126
Goddamn it, I hate 3.5 dragons.

>> No.21890279

>>21890159
I already am.

>> No.21890289

>>21890257
>not having a threesome

>> No.21890291

>Capture a dragon
>Release it because local bylaws prevent dragon hunting during the months of oct - february as to not interrupt dragon mating season after adventurers in the 60s nearly ruined the dragon ecology

>> No.21890306

>>21890253
>Capture a dragon
>Ride it... sexually

>> No.21890308

>>21890268
That's definitely not 3.5 dragons.

>> No.21890312

>>21890265

>> No.21890320

>>21890257

You know, I'm always slightly baffled by the idea of having sex with an unpolymorphed dragon. Wouldn't there be a scale issue?

>> No.21890329

>reach level 20
>dragons keep attempting to slay me and steal my hoard
wat do /tg/

>> No.21890332

>>21890320
It's easy,
Just talk softly and carry a big stick.

>> No.21890349

>>21890306
I swear to god this pic gets posted every single time we have this thread

>>21890312
>Palladium

>> No.21890352

>>21890257
Nothing.

>> No.21890357

>>21890320
>Wouldn't there be a scale issue
>Scale issue
>Scale
1/10

>> No.21890363

>>21890165
>not polymorphing the dragon into a more manageable form, polymorphing himself into an aberration and violating her senseless
It's like your court wizard hasn't read any scrolls from the eastern lands, and has studied only scrolls from uncertified amateur wizards.

>> No.21890364

>>21890332
That's a ROU, right? I swear it's a ROU kind of name.

>> No.21890371

>>21890320
It was brought up, and the general consensus was that you don't have to take all of your clothes off to fuck something. All you have to do is keep your pants on while you're doing her and the cloth/leather/metal of your clothing/armor takes all of the punishment, so your soft flesh doesn't have to.

>> No.21890382

>>21890371
>Stand under trash compactor
>Wear platemail
>Don't have to avoid it because your platemail armor will take all of the punishment for you

>> No.21890385

>>21890349
Surely one does not take issue with a system in which scantily clad (if not outright naked) tattooed chicks is one of the outright most powerful player classes in the game.

>> No.21890387

>>21890357

It wasn't intentional, but once I saw it I decided to leave it in. Plus, I couldn't think of a way to mention the disparity in sizes whilst avoiding the word "scale" that didn't take up an entire paragraph.

>> No.21890388

>>21890371
I think he's referring to the fact that the dragon is ten times his size.

>> No.21890393

>Encounter dragon
>Capture her heart

>> No.21890410

>>21890393
Bleh. I prefer dragons as mounts (no, not that kind) or as half-gods. All this bestiality talks leaves me unfazed.

>> No.21890419

>>21890382
>>21890388
If the size is the problem, then it's best to strip down completely and be prepared to get wet and wild. Crawl right up in there and start writhing around like you're crazy..

>> No.21890425

Don't see the appeal. I just kill the thing and sell its skin for extra cash.

>> No.21890426

>>21890382
One does not simply "enter" a dragon...

>> No.21890431

>>21890410
It's not bestiality if your lover is sentient.

Then it's just xenophilia.

>> No.21890434

>>21890329

Roll to seduce, fucktard.

>> No.21890437

>>21890382
>Batman Jokes

My nigga

>> No.21890442

>>21890387
You could have said size issues?

>> No.21890445

>>21890431

Don't you mean sapient?

>> No.21890447

>>21890419
>Crawl right up in there and start writhing around like you're crazy..
>writhing around like you're crazy..
>like you're crazy..
>like

>> No.21890449

>>21890431
No, it still is. See apes, chimps, various cetaceans.

>> No.21890461

>>21890445
Even still. See >>21890449 again. Unless by sapient, you think only humans qualify, and let me laugh at you if that's the case.

>> No.21890462

>capture a dragon
>put it in prison
>it won't fit
>have to let it go

>> No.21890468

>>21890442

People would have assumed penis if I said size. They did when I said scale though, but that's /tg/ for you.

>> No.21890474

>>21890449
>fucking a dolphin is bestiality

Nice try faggot, been doing it for a year now.

>> No.21890476

>>21890445
Same difference

>> No.21890480

>>21890447
Can't say I didn't see that one coming. You'd pretty much have to be either crazy or a hardcore xenophile with a potion of darkvision, a bottle of air, and no sense of personal space or common decency to do that.

>> No.21890492

>>21890474
Just because you do it doesn't mean it isn't.

>> No.21890493

>>21890449
Those aren't really sapient in the same way humans are. They're a rather slow child-level intellect.

Now if you uplifted them we'd be in business.

>> No.21890505

>>21890200

>Sunlight needs to be a threat
>Laughingdraculastruttingdownthebeachwithbitches.jpg

>> No.21890511

>>21890493
I'd guess humans would be slow and child-like to a dragon.

>> No.21890515

>>21890480
So your average adventurer, then?

>> No.21890523

>>21890461
What qualifies as sapient is up for debate, but generally speaking we mean human-level intellect when we say it, or close to it. As smart as great apes and cetaceans are, they are NOT on the same level as us.

No matter what Ecco the Dolphin would have you believe.

>> No.21890524

>>21890461

I'd argue there's degrees of both sentience and sapience. We've discovered that crows can pass on information of who to divebomb to each other somehow, which means they probably have a language of some kind.

>> No.21890532

>>21890511
Seeing as dragons and humans are of similar INT scores, not really.

>> No.21890533

>>21890515
But your average adventurer is a kill happy psychopath.

>> No.21890537

>>21890493
>They're a rather slow child-level intellect.
Heh.

>> No.21890549

>>21890511
As if that matters. The abundance of half-dragons out there shows that they don't give a fuck. (Or more accurately, they give fucks out without discrimination.)

>> No.21890551

>>21890515
Average adventurer with specific magic items. Though, you could find both of the required items in basically any city large enough.

>>21890533
Unless they're a bard, then they're just fuck-happy.

>> No.21890575

>>21890551
Bards: No sense of what's socially acceptable to put your dick into!

>> No.21890592

>>21890575
Which is why we always kill them first.

>> No.21890612

>>21890592
They're a drain on the economy. Instead of re-investing their quest rewards in the local shops, they spend it all on child support.

>> No.21890620

>>21890612
>implying those supported child don't buy things
>implying natality isn't a good thing for an economy

>> No.21890638

>>21890612
>allowing half-breeds into your city

Sounds like a problem you made for yourself there brah

>> No.21890639

>>21890612
No it's mostly because pussy is one of the first things to get men to betray one another and the bard is the only one of the group who might even contemplate fucking the victim race of the week.

>> No.21890646

>>21890620
Monsters don't live in towns, you idiot! All that gold just ends up lying around in caves or being traded to traveling gnomes or some shit.

>> No.21890651

>>21890515
>Alright, cover me guys... I'm going in!

>> No.21890654

>>21890612
Like they've really got a choice. What do you think would happen if he didn't pay to help take care of even one of those kids?

He'd be dead is what.

>> No.21890664

>>21890549
>That feel when it's so much easier for male party members to fuck a dragon with their body....

>> No.21890676

>>21890620

True, plus most of the money they'll spend will go to business selling things the majority of people will need, i.e. food and clothing, thus allowing those businesses to reinvest that money and grow, rather than having adventurers come in and support businesses only catering to adventurers.

>> No.21890705

That's it. Group's next game will be Dark Sun. I am so making a "will fucks everything" Bard with charisma out the ass.

>> No.21890706

>>21890646

Dem gnomes, man. Stealing all of the profit with their crafty, villanous ways. Taking dollars from out of the country and using it to feed their own, obese and grotesque families. What can be done?

I propose a solution to this.

A final solution.

>> No.21890714

>>21890705
>Dark Sun
>bard who fucks anything

You know what must be done

>> No.21890726

>>21890706
Does it involve fucking a lot of gnomes?

>> No.21890728

>>21890638
>Telling the Bard with more levels than your city guard has combined he can't drop his horrible spawn off to live wherever he wants
Let me know how that works out for you

>> No.21890737

Rolled 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1 = 25

>>21890676

\tg\ we get economy done.

>> No.21890738

>find a Red Dragon hatchling
>can't bear to abandon it
>know this little bastard is going to grow up evil
>Suddenly inspiration!
>convince it that you are Evil
>convince it that to be Evil is to be selfless, noble and compassionate
>Ignorant townspeople are convinced that his saying he's evil is just a juvenile phase to make himself sound tough
>what's that Trogdor? Are there any Evil Dragon gods? Why yes! He's called Bahamut…

Oh boy, this shit is going to go nuclear one day.

>> No.21890744

>>21890726
What you do before to them doesn't matter.

>> No.21890747

>>21890524
That's because crows are scarily smart. The New Caledonian Crow actually makes and modifies tools, then teaches the other crows in the group.

Screw the jokes about dolphins and primate intelligence, crows are going to be our new overlords.

>> No.21890748

>Be insane
>Capture dragon
>Make it go insane
>Ride it into battle

>> No.21890758

>>21890676
>be adventuring town next to a dungeon
>overpowered adventures clean the dungeon out
>now a ghost town

>> No.21890769

>Capture a dragon
>Already have 6 creatures with me
>Box 1 is full
>Had to release dragon
GOD DAMN IT

>> No.21890778

>>21890728
I think it ultimately involves him fucking the guards, too.

>> No.21890802

>party encounters haughty, dickass androgynous elf
>party instantly hates elf, which is good, because s/he is a BBEG
>later, after BBEG's master plan is revealed, s/he reveals him/herself as a dragon
>party kills the fuck out of it
>party ranger walks up to dead dragon corpse
>"I'm going to check this thing's gender. I have nature trained."
>Nat 20.
>You have much experience looking at dragon genitals. You can see that this dragon is in fact a hermaphrodite
>"Huh, neat. Would a merchant give me anything for them?"

all_of_my_why.jpg

>> No.21890831

>>21890802
>You have much experience looking at dragon genitals.

>> No.21890833

>>21890738
You had me at Trogdor. Seriously. Take all my fucks.

>> No.21890841

>>21890802
>you have much experience looking at dragon genitals
10/10 DM of the year

>> No.21890849

>>21890769
>Still playing editions that don't automatically switch boxes when full

>> No.21890874

>>21890747
Crows are amazingly resourceful. Ravens even more so. Hell all the corvidae birds are remarkably intelligent.

>> No.21890881

>>21890738
Reminds me of the forgotten realms.
>Wizard crossbreeds gold and red dragons until he gets a dragon with red scales but a naturally good heart.
>Wizard raises said dragon to adulthood, becomes famous for having the most noble red dragon to ever exist.
>He and his dragon companion become epic heroes
>Turns out that a secret magical prison housing three of the most powerful daemons the elves have ever known was cursed so that the prison would break if a red dragon who never knew greed in his heart flew over it.
>Welp

>> No.21890884

>>21890833
Any Paladin that names their adoptive dragon/son anything other than Trogdor deserves to fall.

>> No.21890891

>>21890802
"Does that mean I can make beer out of it?"

>> No.21890898

>Capture a dragon
>Put it into a prison
>it melts its way out of there and kills fucking everybody because it's a fucking DRAGON and polymorph is one of its least powerful tools

>> No.21890909

>>21890802
>hermaphrodite dragon genitals
Merchant? Fuck no, and he'd tell everyone at the tavern about the nutter that tried to hock dragon junk to him.

A wizard from the college, though? Oh, holy shit, yes, yes he would.

>> No.21890930

>>21890881
You can bet some cackling bastard of a seer made that condition.

>why such a specific release event?
>oh… no reason

>> No.21890933

>>21890891
I wonder if there's beer... on the sun....

>> No.21890955

>>21890909
>A wizard from the college, though? Oh, holy shit, yes, yes he would.
Can you imagine what a wizard would do with hermaphroditic dragon gunk? I can... I can imagine it pretty vividly...

>> No.21890968

>>21890738
Except dragons don't decide to be evil by looking up the meaning of evil and then going "Hmm, seems like I must do bad things and kill stuff because that's what evil means and yup it says Evil on my Monster Manual stat block"

They are evil because they are naturally incapable of feeling compassion, only rage and greed.

>> No.21890977

>>21890747
But can they talk like this?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=emUCJL4CCfs

>> No.21890978

>>21890933
>beer
>sun

I wonder what beer made of the sun would taste like? Just, like, figure out a way to solidify sunlight into a liquid, then ferment it?

>> No.21891009

>>21890955
Aside from animating it and having a jolly old time?

Hmm... all the research that could ever come out of something like that would be incredibly perverted, but so, so fun.

>> No.21891016

>>21890968
And that's why Rule 0 is fucking awesome.

>> No.21891100

>>21890978
It'd be pretty damn valuable... 40 gold a unit, perhaps?

>> No.21891140

>>21891100
Valuable's all fine and well, lad, but what would it taste like?

>> No.21891187

>>21891140
Like a white beer, most likely. Bready and yeasty and citrusy, with a good bit of malty sweetness, hints of warm spices like cinnamon and coriander, and the slightest edge of hops to it.

>> No.21891352

>>21890891
For fucks sake, why did I start drinking a beer while reading this thread…

I fucking hate my imagination sometimes

>> No.21891623

>>21890612
I'd like to find where the pic is of this same bard fathering a stone elemental with the party's elf chick so sick of his shenanigans that she want's to castrate him?

Can anyone help a fa/tg/uy out?

>> No.21891704

>>21891623
http://andersson.elfwood.com/
somewhere on the list

>> No.21891752

>>21891140
Probably blood, maybe some ashes, with the faintest hint of blood-curdling screams and the onset of mouth cancer.

>> No.21891754

>>21891704
>http://andersson.elfwood.com/
Many thanks anon.

In return, here are some super-heroine's to save your day.

>> No.21891789

>>21890133


this

>> No.21891829

This thread went places.

>> No.21891967

>>21890129
Better not be a green dragon, or it'll grow all of that right back.
Actually, disregard that, if you've gotten close enough to a green dragon to attempt to capture it you're already dead.
>Acid breath, yo.

>> No.21892221

>>21891967
>green dragon
>regeneration
In what system? Is it the same system as the one above where all true dragons can teleport? Because, that's a system I want to look into.

>> No.21892483

>>21892221
Well in the system where all true dragons can teleport (palladium system), all dragons have some form of super fast regeneration as well.

>> No.21892514

>>21890849
>implying this wasn't back in the day when the games were still good.

>> No.21892528

>>21892483
Isn't Palladium basically either a similar system to, or the same system as, RIFTS?

If so, I've heard nothing but bad come out of descriptions of that system, except from people that started with it and have nostalgia for it.

>> No.21892573

You people will never change no matter how creepy you are.

Like we could be arguing about whether bullets in Star Trek will actually hurt Borg, and you're still creepy.

>> No.21892618

>>21892573
They're not energy weapons, and thus harder to modulate themselves to. Even if they can render themselves immune to them, they'd remain effective for longer than phasers would, due to the massive number of variables in penetration, type of ammunition, composition of target, etc.

>> No.21892633

>>21890462
"Better luck next time."

>> No.21892691

Christ, /tg/. Like, every other dragon thread ends in discussions about having sex with them. What the hell?

What can we do to improve that ratio?

>> No.21892716

>>21892528
It's the same-ish system. Rifts just adds some extra rules to the Palladium system.

As someone who started with AD&D though, I can say I enjoy RIFTS, but you really need to have a group with good communication and willingness to follow rule 0.

>> No.21892733

>>21892691
We really can't. People believe that anyone that wants to talk about having sex with dragons is a furry.

We'd have to excise that stigma and, in something as big as the internet, that's nigh-on impossible.

>> No.21892997

>>21892733
Bullshit. /tg/ goes on and on about sexing dragons. (Look at this thread alone.) It's even produced writefaggotry on the subject on occasion (if nothing compared to the amount of thri-kreen erotica /tg/'s made.) /tg/ is scalie as fuck.

I was being sarcastic with that question.

>> No.21893143

>>21892997
By and large? Sure, /tg/'s /d/-lite. There's a very vocal minority that goes absolutely crazy if there's a thread like this when they're online. Or, at least, there used to be.

I've seen a lot less of it recently, which I'm glad for. It means that there are less loud-mouthed idiots bitching about every-fucking-thing that's on /tg/ that they don't like.

They do come out in force sometimes, though.

>> No.21893150

>>21891623
Found it.

>> No.21893204

>>21892716
rule 0?

>> No.21893234

>>21893204
Depending on who you ask, it's either, "The DM is always right," or, "Rules be damned, have fun."

>> No.21893250

>>21893234
I like to think Rule Zero is whichever of those is most immediately applicable.

>> No.21893350

>>21893234
ahh... new to pen&paper. thanks.

>> No.21893395

>> No.21893407

>>21890431
Book of Bile Farkness claims that any interspecies sex counts as bestiality and is an inherently evil act. Not that anyone takes that POS seriously.

If it's sentient, sapient and attractive, I say roll to crit. No regrets.

>> No.21893443 [SPOILER] 

>>21893407
Do you, anon...

>> No.21893677

>>21890737
Kinda sure if want

>> No.21893705

>>21889478

>Capture a dragon
>Put it in prison

wait wtf how??

>> No.21893913

>>21893705
Typically, you beat on it until it's weak, break the scale and shell on its head and forelimbs, and sever its tail, then you get it into a pit trap and throw tranq bombs at it until it's knocked out.

And then, while it's trapped, you restrain it.

>> No.21893934

>>21892483
Nah, there's no Green Dragon in that system. I mean, a couple of them might be green, but it isn't a type or anything.

>> No.21893996

>>21892716
We mostly play it straight, but as I'm learned over the years, some people have interpreted the rules differently than others, and moving some of them from those opinions requires more than an act of God.

>> No.21894048

>>21893913
That seems a bit excessive.

Drug it and then charm/dominate monster. Failing that, beat on it until it's unconscious and then go lilliputian on it. Ropes, chains, muzzle, whatever you deem necessary. Hire an ox team or simply let it do the walking with the understanding that it dies if it doesn't. (Dragons are long-lived and inclined to take the long view of "I may eventually get free" if they don't have their blood up at the moment.)

Or I suppose people could do your thing.

>> No.21894058

>>21894048
Forgot my image.

>> No.21894124

>Capturing dragons
>Not becoming best friends with them and sharing freely their vast knowledge of the world
>Not becoming an unstoppable immortal with a kickass dragon bro
>Not getting introduced to fine dragon ladies
>Not watching your awesome half-dragon son graduate

>> No.21894170

>>21894048
Egh. Xorvintaal.

I just prefer to hunt the bastards. They want to be bestial, monstrous assholes, just ripping and tearing across the landscape? Fine, we'll treat them like beasts and monsters.

Monster Hunter capture quests is what I was referencing. The quickest way to wear a wyvern down is to break the breakable spots on its body. These are typically the wings/hands, the face, and the tail, which falls off when you break/sever it. This works because it decreases its armor, which means that it takes more damage, becoming susceptible to tranq bombs faster.

>> No.21894193

>>21894124
>Not getting infusions of alchemically prepared dragon blood and becoming a dragon.

>> No.21894229

>>21894124
Hey, some of us don't have a neighborhood touchy-feely metallic like you apparently do.

>>21894170
Oh. Never played it.
But honestly, unless someone steals from a dragon, or does something to phenomenally piss one off, there's no reason for them to be randomly rampaging across the countryside. Unless that's what their mating displays are like, or they go through some equivalent of a 'stupid teenager' phase.

>> No.21894284

>>21894229
Well, the wyverns in MH are kind of... animal-grade-dumb. And highly territorial to boot. Add to that humans that are just getting into their expansionist phase, and moving around a lot, and you have a shit-ton of pissed off monsters that spit fire, or poison, or whatever.

Getting a bit off-topic, though.

>> No.21894291

>>21894229
Or you use the Forgotten Realms reason.
Dragons originally ruled the world, elves said balls to that, and created an epic magic that was bound to a comet that came near Toril every few decades.
When the comet is visible in the night sky, all dragons on the planet go into a bloodthirsty rampage where their higher thought processes are shut down.
This led to the beasts destroying their own kingdoms, their loved ones, and even their own hoards.
This also led to a lot of dragon slaying as suddenly those who hated dragons now saw them at their weakest, and those who loved their dragon overlords now hated them.
Etc.

>> No.21894339

>>21894193
Whoever said that turns you into a dragon is a liar. It turns you into something far better.

>> No.21894388

>>21894339
>better

>> No.21894413

>>21894339
Sort of why you make sure your alchemist isn't retarded.

>> No.21894466

>>21890118
>>21890093
Both.

>> No.21894472

>>21890306
Well, on that note...It's time for bed....

>> No.21894496

>>21894472
>>21890306
I still can't get over quite how much effort someone put in to make lingerie fit a dragon.

>> No.21894513

>>21894496
It's not lingerie, it's a maid outfit.

>> No.21894534

>>21894513
I think he's referring specifically to the lingerie-style panties.

>> No.21894540

>>21894339
Remember. Get the alchemist to give you copies of all their notes from the preparation of said concoction before you murder them in the cruelest and most brutal fashion imaginable. Helps out the next guy.

>> No.21894638

>>21894534
Correct. Seriously. All that effort.

>> No.21894700

>>21890291
God damn but this is probably how DnD would actually go.

>> No.21894745

>>21894638
It looks like some kind of harness. Like, the actual elastic-y bit goes around the tail, and only has the actual panty cover over her bits, and the rest of it is thin, and fits on around her waist.

>> No.21894748

>>21894700
Naw. Given that dragons are sentient, they'd probably end up like Native Americans. They get casinos to take advantage of everyone else and a few live on reservations. Otherwise assimilated.

>> No.21894775

>>21893913
10/10
Monstar Huntin'

>> No.21894807

>Capture a dragon
>put it in prison
>turns out it's female with a BDSM fetish
>spend the next few weeks having kinky bondage sex with a dragon

Fuck yeah

>> No.21894826

>>21890306
>>21890212
>>21890363
>8/10, would 'slay'.

>> No.21894829

>>21894339
I'm nopt sure is super-powered alchemically-prepared-dragon-blood addict is strictly "better". Fun ride as long as you can keep your sponsor feeding you, or as long as you can rampage around killing other dragons for their blood.

>> No.21894872

>Capture a dragon
>put it in prison
>it demands it's phone call
>it sues you for false imprisonment and discrimination against dragonfolk
>many months of tedious court appearances and a damaged reputation result
>dragon rights movement started
>empire sets up ghettos to contain dragons
>livestock and gold thievery, maiden kidnappings and arson crime goes through the roof

Fuck

>> No.21894935

>>21894872
>dragon proves its not just some ordinary asshole

>gets released, apologized to, and its hoard restored

>dragon is somewhat dumbfounded

>relations with dragonkind go good from there

Seriously, its like you guys dont even understand decency

Just fix what you did wrong and most of the time it fixes everything

>> No.21894998

>>21894935
You! I like you. You, and that mentality, make up the kind of person that holds the ability to restore someone's faith in humanity.

>> No.21895000

>Permanently polymorph into a male dragon while in prison
>Have intimate relations with another male dragon in prison, prison bitch acquired
>Capture the guards and eat them, then escape together
>The keys are the first piece of our new horde

It's like a fucking symphony of fetishes and debauchery, /tg/. How many buttons can I press...

>> No.21895030

>>21895000
I am truly, truly surprised you aren't trying to hit all the buttons several times over. Up your game, kid.

>> No.21895045

>>21894935
>>21894998
Haha, right, because ghettos are so great in the real world.

>> No.21895054

>>21895000
Make it straight and you've sold it.

>> No.21895107

>>21895054
But dragons are all bisexual. Easily accessible polymorph kind of messes up with your perception of gender.

>> No.21895115

>>21895045
>look at my lack of reading comprehension

Go and read those two posts again. Neither mentions ghettos.

>> No.21895132

>>21895054
Yeah, but it doesn't mine. I was referring to you selling me on it. I cannot into the gayz.

>> No.21895194

ALL OF THE BUTTONS!

Also there's a straight edition, the first dragon's a girl but the guy dragon's still her prison bitch.

>> No.21895201

>>21895132
Filthy casual.

>> No.21895336

>>21893143

You can hide threads you don't like now without installing anything extra.

>> No.21895471

>>21895336
What makes you think I don't like this thread? I just don't like shit-posters shitting up related, non-rule-breaking threads, and, "hide post, report poster," only works if the janitor/mod agrees you with you on whether the guy you're reporting is doing something wrong.

>> No.21895522

>>21890306
Could you imagine something like that if it were a colossal dragon? You're standing there smaller than one of its claws just staring up at that. If she wanted, she could just slide you inside herself and enjoy feeling you squirm.

>> No.21895525

>>21895336
Could be. Could be.

>>21895471
Well, I'm sure you have no issues with this thread, then.

>> No.21895552

>>21895522
I don't follow.

>> No.21895568

>>21895471

I didn't even say that at all: I implied that somebody who might not like it can easily hide it.

Don't get your panties twisted bro

>> No.21895578

>>21895552

Going spelunking in the dragon's 'cave', perhaps looking for treasure type O.

>> No.21895608

>>21895522
I'm imagining a kobold and a not-quite-that-large dragon, and the kobold crawls up inside her and takes advantage of the difference in size to

>>21895568
I'm not, I just misconstrued your meaning, and explained myself.

Also, now that I know what you meant, this implies that people that don't like this thread would be willing to just hide and ignore it, instead of shit-posting in something that they view as, "cancer," to, "their /tg/." By and large, they're not.

>> No.21895618

>>21895578
Oh is that all? well then you just need to use the mystical red orb to find the O. Assuming of course it can be found.

>> No.21895635

>>21895608
Forgot to keep typing on that first bit.

>I'm imagining a kobold and a not-quite-that-large dragon, and the kobold crawls up inside her and takes advantage of the difference in size to

crawl to the deepest reaches of her and just lay there, basking in her body heat and masturbating furiously.

>> No.21895641

>>21895578
You misunderstand, sir. I refuse to follow.

I do not possess that particular button.[/spoiler]

>> No.21895703

>Thread about capturing a dragon and it escaping
>The main subject for the past hour or so has been about having sex with dragon
I'm still not surprised

>> No.21895737

At least OP's pic is still relevant!

>ilovte but

See, even captcha's being a pervert.

>> No.21895774

>>21895703
OP may well have intended it.

Personally, I see little to no appeal in playing cave-explorer, though conceivably could appreciate a male dragon and female humanoid but I presume that to be another subject entirely.

Halfdragons are much more appealing. Doesn't matter which one is which.

>> No.21895805

>>21895774

I've seen some loo-loos related to that spoilered part, lemme tell ya...goddamn, Internet...

>> No.21895834

>>21895805
loo-loos?

>> No.21895840

>>21895774
The difference between column A and Column B though is that when one gets together it ends with a bloody corpse torn asunder, and a different corpse crushed and smelly. Either way I would imagine a Lich would get either a kick out of it or disgusted sigh.

>> No.21895843

>>21894534
Well, I have several versions without panties, too...

>> No.21895864

>>21895834

Humdingers, doozies, whoppers.

I guess it's 'lulus' but I know someone by that name and she's...not a loo-loo.

>> No.21895888

>>21895864
Slang is weird.

>>21895840
I think I speak for both sides when I point out that it's obviously fictitious and therefore that not happening is an acceptable break from reality. Unless of course, that's your thing.

>> No.21895925

>>21895888
Its not, just pointing out the worst case scenario coming from lack of prepardness and COMMUNICATION.

Remember folks, always find out the safe word first.

>> No.21895962

Maybe a stoneskin spell would prevent such a thing.

>> No.21896040

>>21895843
Link, upload and link, or post, please?

>> No.21896083

>>21895522
>>21895635

>> No.21896134

>>21896040
www.e621.net/post/show/272957/
www.e621.net/post/show/272958/

Enjoy

>> No.21896181

You know, the one thing that really irks me about DnD dragons is that their alignments are based on their colours.

>> No.21896192

>>21896181
>not throwing alignment out the window entirely

>> No.21896199

>>21890352
that's a hot lady dragon. I would have boned her, too.

>> No.21896213

>>21896192

... That makes a surprising amount of sense.

>> No.21896367

>Not befriending and seducing a coldhalfdragon woman who's grown bitter and lonely in a world that fears and hates her.
>Not melting her heart, teaching her to be happy and love again.
>Not living happily ever after with your one true love.

>> No.21896445

>>21889478

>need to capture a dragon
>convince local Jarl to reactivate dragon trap built into his ancient castle
>challenge the dragon
>capture it
>mfw it's now my greatest ally

>> No.21896458

>>21896445
Odavinng is mai husbando.

>> No.21896465

>>21896367
Why would I want a HALF-dragon when I could have a WHOLE dragon?

>> No.21896480

>>21896465
For one, you could carry her down the temple steps after you get married.

>> No.21896501

>>21896480
She could just carry me, your point?

>> No.21896569

>>21896501
Traditionally, it's the bride who's carried.
Your preferences diverge from my own but are equally valid.

>> No.21897023 [SPOILER] 

This seems relevant to this thread.

>> No.21897234

>> No.21897446

>>21895840
Unless the dragon is really big, then it's just a female spelunker

>> No.21898895

>>21895000
>How many buttons can I press...

>> No.21899334

>>21898895
How many buttons, huh?

>> No.21899369

>>21899334
>Censorboxes.
Why?
It's not like we can't see what's going on.

>> No.21899402

>>21899334
moar! source?

>> No.21899413

>>21899369
There are things called moderators. At times, strange and arcane rituals are used in attempts to satiate or ward off their sinister presence.

>> No.21899441

>>21899413
That's a shame really. I would have loved to see some divine retribution on the polygamy menace.

>> No.21899448

>>21899441
Que?

>> No.21899452

>>21899334
reverse google does nothing

>> No.21899468

>>21899452
>>21899402
I'll get you your sauce, gimme a moment.

IIRC, that's about the porniest thing the artist does, but she's got several "technically sfw" images in that vein, though nothing else that complex.

>> No.21899492

>>21899334
Personally, all the buttons. Sadly, I've seen it before.

If anyone has more like it, I implore you to donate it.

>> No.21899697 [SPOILER] 

>>21899402
>>21899452
Found it.

http://www.hentai-foundry.com/pictures/user/Miss_Demeter

If people actually want, I could go start a thread on /d/.

>> No.21899771

>>21899697
Do it

>> No.21899791

>Try to put dragon in prison
>Dragon's lawyers get it off scott-free

What game am I playing?

>> No.21899797

>>21890744
I Reich where this is going

>> No.21899928

>>21899771
>>>/d/4412725
Or however you do crossboard linking. Don't do it often enough to remember.

>> No.21899979

>>21899697
>>21899928
appreciated <3

>> No.21900054 [SPOILER] 

>>21899979
Anything for /tg/.

>> No.21901233

>>21900054
Thanks.

>> No.21901300

>>21890179
Pretty sure nobody outside D&D would put a dragon in a prison.

>> No.21901315

>>21901300
See >>21896445

>> No.21901318

>>21893443
sorry, what point were you trying to prove again?

>> No.21901333

>>21901318
Presumably, something minor, inconsequential, and long-past.

I'd hit it too. Dat Ass.

>> No.21901345

>>21899797
>I reich
you fail at deutschbagging

>> No.21901719

Sometimes I think that /tg/ has changed since a few years ago. Not in a good or bad way, just changed.

Then I see a thread like this and realise that we're still the same /d/eviants we used to be, but we have to keep it on a leash most of the time now.

Never change.

>> No.21901898

>>21901345
What, did he get the i-e allocation screwed up?

>>21901719
Y-you too.

>> No.21902015

>>21899334
I kind of want a writefag to narrate that.

>> No.21903125

>>21897023
Stripper dragon.

Imokwiththis.png

>> No.21903894

>>21899334
Is there a reverse with a male dragon hunter violating his captures?

Along with some Orc bitches?

>>
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