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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.21655376 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

In the heart of the vale, more than three day's walk to the nearest civilized city, the sun slowly sank over the edge of the sky.

You pant loudly as your crunch through the woods, bow in hand, as you run toward the elk you'd struck. The creature would run until it bled out, you knew, or until it got tired enough that you could catch up and slit the creature's throat, putting it out of it's misery. You catch a hint of it through the trees, as you run further north. You've never gone this far north before, but you've been down here for two days, and you'll be damned if you don't have anything to bring back to the village. You catch a sight of your quarry again. Definitely slowing, you think, before the ground gives way beneath you, and you tumble into darkness.

When you wake up, your head is fuzzy, and you find it hard to think. You pry open your eyes, and you can see a hole, so far above you, casting sunlight down through the trees, as you recollect your thoughts. You live in the village of Waymoor, you murmur. You are eighteen years old, and your name is...
For a moment, you can't quite recall, but it's at the tip of your tongue...

>What be your name and gender?

>> No.21655395

Lyra Merde, female.

>> No.21655401

Fernando Perez, male

>> No.21655412

Arnold Barnes, Male.

>> No.21655430

Abel Davidson, male

>> No.21655434



>> No.21655440

You're early, Exabutt!

Steve D'avelline

>> No.21655445

Lillian Selest, female.

>> No.21655465

Let's not name our protagonist "poop"

>> No.21655467

I like Barnes, but not Arnold so much...
Abel Barnes?

>> No.21655473


>> No.21655474

This sounds pretty good too.

Abel/Arnold Barnes seconding.

>> No.21655480

Abel, you recall, your throat dry, as you stare up at the sky. Abel Barnes. It was almost sundown when you were out hunting, but the sky seems much too bright for that. You must have been unconscious for some time.
You push yourself to your feet, picking up your bow again, running your fingers over it, making certain there was no damage. Your head pounds, and you lean your forehead against the cold stone for a moment, before you finally take a look at your surroundings. You're in some sort of underground cavern, with... carved stones, set into the walls, and there's only a single doorway, leading into complete darkness. In the corner of your eye, you see a strange carving on one of the nearby walls.

Carefully, using the sunlight from above to see, you slowly trace your fingers along the carving, examining it. It's old. Older than you, older than your mother, older than the village, even. In the carving- no, some sort of mural, you realize- is a landscape and some kind of battle, it seems. On the right was a horde of soldiers, cruel-faced and furious, and on the left, there were three singular characters, facing the horde on their own.
>Field too long!

>> No.21655494

High up, on a hill, is a hooded figure, a long spear pointing toward the sky. The figure's arms seemed much too long, but they stood there like some sort of sentinel, you suppose. Down, near the horde, was a furious, horned being, his claws wrapped around some kind of hammer, tearing through the horde. And in the center, pointing his blade at the horde, was a strange man in a cloak, a long sword in his hand, the cloak flowing back behind him... and then you note that his ears were pointed. How strange.

>Which would you like to examine in more detail?
> [] Sentinel
> [] Horned being
> [] Swordsman

>> No.21655508


>> No.21655511


>> No.21655514

>> [] Sentinel

>> No.21655538

>[] Swordsman

>> No.21655559

Changing to swordsman

>> No.21655565


>> No.21655568

Horned being

>> No.21655586

>Horned being
...sentinel salvo? you're damn boring and predictable /tg/

>> No.21655596

Predictable would be swordsman bro.

>> No.21655598

As you brush your hand across the mural again, looking closer at the heroic swordsman, you feel the ground suddenly quake, the mural crumbling beneath your hand, as the shaking knocks you over. You lay on your back for the second time in as many minutes, before the sunlight suddenly cuts out, as the hole to the surface suddenly gets blocked by something, as the trembling slows. A tree, perhaps? You try to look around, blind, when something stops you. A soft humming noise, from somewhere behind you. You whirl about, peering further into the cavern, and you see... soft, blue light, dancing along the wall. Beckoning you further in.

This whole thing has a taste of magic to it. And as the Order always says, magic is the work of witches- the work of evil. But... you've never seen magic before, and there's not much you can do, buried in darkness...
On you walk, trying to peer deeper into the darkness, as you approach the light.

The next room is just as dark, stone bricks hewed into the walls and floor, but there's a strange blue glow, completely without a source. But you see a strange dais in the center, illuminated with the light, and a simple steel sword, simply sitting there.

>> No.21655608

Ignore it, look over the mural again.

>> No.21655622

>We could've had a spear or a warhammer, but noooo. Damnit /tg/.
Look around for hidden danger, then get a closer look.

>> No.21655636

Nothing else to see, let's have a closer look

Blame the anon that changed his vote.

>> No.21655657

Sentinel still had the most votes, so yes. Fuck this sword with its elfness. Go back to the mural.

>> No.21655663

Hooray, Exabutts new quest!

>> No.21655682

Wary, you creep forward, squinting into the darkness to try to see any hidden danger, as your eyes slowly adjust to the darkness. Not seeing anything out of the ordinary, other than the rather large rock you nearly tripped over, you get closer to the dais, examining the sword. There was nothing out of the ordinary about it, with a long handle, and a single-edged blade. You don't know quite enough about swords, but judging from old Kalveer's work, back in the village, whoever made this was a master blacksmith. It looked sharp, awfully so. It doesn't whisper fell secrets in your ear, or hum ominously- the hum seems to be coming from the room itself, or, perhaps, the dais.

The ground quakes again, but not nearly as badly as it did last time, as rocks and dirt fall on your head and shoulders, and you lean on the dais for support. Luckily, the entire place doesn't collapse in on you.

>> No.21655713


Damn, that's boring as fuck.

Should have chosen horned being, or at least sentinel.

>> No.21655716

We did choose sentinel, but then that one anon decided to be a bitch and change his vote.

>> No.21655725

Oh well, lets see where this goes.

>> No.21655729

Frankly, taking ten minutes to let the players choose a character class for chargen is weak.

>> No.21655765

Grab it and get out of there. That cave isn't safe.

>> No.21655768

Exabyte is known to be very fast in his updates. It is both good and bad, mostly good though. I can't stand quests that take 3 hours for a single update (I just read those in archives if they are good enough).

>> No.21655797

Pacing is for after you've made the initial decisions. Why is every questfag on /tg/ so bad at situational decisions? Even Vedibere had pacing problems.

>> No.21655824

Quickly, you grab the handle of the sword, sliding it into your belt, quickly trying to make your way out of there. The way things keep shaking, you wouldn't be surprised if the entire thing fell in. You creep further into the cave, when everything starts shaking again, badly. For another few moments, you back up against the sturdiest wall, hoping nothing falls on you, before you hear something crash in the mural room, and the shaking stops. You peek into the room, and see a long slant of dirt and stone, leading up to the surface again. Licking your lips, as they were still dry, you make your way up the slant, and back into the fresh air.

The forest surrounds you, and you hear rustling... and growling. Eying where the growling was coming from, you see your quarry, dead, as wolves surround it, tearing at it. One of the wolves stare at you, growling, warning you off.

They'd stolen your kill.

>> No.21655826

Bitching about picking the boring choice isn't getting us anywhere.
What >>21655765 said

>> No.21655843

Fucking wolves.
How badly do we need that meat?

>> No.21655859

Put your god damn new blade in their hearts.

>> No.21655895

Are we any decent with a bow to take on that many wolves?
Not worth it though, I guess, just make a sign that it won't be as peaceful next time, and then off to find something else to eat. We need that meat after all.

>> No.21655911

Nope, not worth it. Let's find something else.

>> No.21655922

Your eyes meet the wolf's eyes, as the two of you stare one another down. You need that meat- your mother's never been the healthiest, and your sister isn't old enough to hunt, so ever since your father died, your family's been struggling...

You look down to the sword, and then back at the wolf. A second one, sated from the deer, steps up next to the first, joining it. You're not sure you could fight all three of the wolves, even with your new weapon- you hardly know how to use it, after all. You'd have to be rather lucky to kill two of them with your bow, and your quarry's already been chewed on quite a bit...

>Whatever action you take, roll 1d100. I'll be taking the median of first three, most of the time, unless you're rather skilled in it, in which case I'll take the highest of first three.

>> No.21655944

Rolled 15

/tg/ dice, who knows

>> No.21655952

Rolled 97

Shoot the closest two, then draw that boring ass sword.

>> No.21655980

Rolled 22

Need a third roll, and no one else wants to roll it apparently.

>> No.21655996


we ded

next time choose the spear

>> No.21656003

Are you even suggesting a course of action?

Back off, it'll be easier to find something else.

>> No.21656018

Fuck that. We murder those wolves or die trying.

>> No.21656022

I was rolling for >>21655952
Didn't think it needed to be stated.

>> No.21656023

Eh, back off.
This isn't over though.

>> No.21656031

Well, if we're particularly skilled with the bow then we'll be fine.

>> No.21656081

Of course it does. Especially when the post you're referencing wasn't there when you posted the roll.

Why? That's dumb. We're not gonna be successful by being dumb.

>> No.21656090

I rolled after the post.
So actually we still need a third roll.

>> No.21656093

You grit your teeth, and then you bend your bow a bit, making sure it wasn't damaged in the fall. Pleased with the result, you take a look at the arrows... and decide to back off. The two wolves watch you go. You're sure you could have taken at least two of them, but the third would have been a risk.

You make your way through the forest, finding a brook and drinking some of the water. It's pure, and clean, fresh from the mountains. You splash your face, seeing a few wild rabbits running through the brush. You snag one with your bow, and quickly set up a camp, pleased that none of your supplies were damaged.
It's almost noon, you see- you must have spent an entire night unconscious, in that cave. You'll need to find something today, if at all, because by the time you get back, you'll have spent five days away- and you have a bad feeling about spending too long out of the village.

>> No.21656105

Let's leave, our life has value, and wolves are poor eating.

>> No.21656106

Let's go hunting then.

>> No.21656109

Let us hunt.

>> No.21656116



>> No.21656128

Are the rabbits worth taking back?

>> No.21656135

Quite. Find some fresh spoor, etc.

>> No.21656141

Wolves are better at fighting than untrained swordsmen.
Which is one of the reasons I voted for spears. You need a lot less training to use a spear properly.

>> No.21656173

Quickly skinning and cleaning the rabbit, you decide that you'd need quite a bit of the small things to bring back, as you set it on the fire. Cleaning up the scratches on your arms and face, you have your morning's meal, before deciding to hunt.

Bow in hand, you creep through the brush, following the tracks and droppings of what you'd guess is a rather small, weedy elk, as you travel southwards, closer to the village.

You stop moving as it does, as you see it slowly drinking from a burbling brook. You draw back your bow...

>Roll for hunting.

>> No.21656176

Are you...are you some kind of fucking retard?

First the crap chargen and now some tripfag that can't understand the concept of rolling for a course of action suggested in the same post to see how it goes.

This whole thread is full of fuck.

>> No.21656184

Rolled 62


>> No.21656191

my favorite part is how we ended up wasting a 97 because of that logic

>> No.21656203

Rolled 72

hunting is something we're good at, right?

>> No.21656204

It was the median anyway. The 97 wouldn't have been used, the 22 would have.

>> No.21656221

Rolled 90


>> No.21656222

Rolled 93

Shoot it in the neck!
Also, what are we skilled at?

>> No.21656242

Re-read >>21655922
>unless you're rather skilled in it, in which case I'll take the highest of first three.

Two attacks with a bow. We're skilled with the bow.

>> No.21656258

We actually don't know how good we are at archery.
So on that note, Exabyte, are we that good at archery?

>> No.21656274

>The 92 would've been used for the two shots, but since you don't know how to use a sword, the 22 meant you would've gotten your ass chewed off by the third.
>You're rather skilled in archery, tracking, swimming, and navigating. You can also carve a few things if you have a knife and a bit of wood, but you never have the time.

Staring it down, you draw back your bow, gauging how far it was from you, before you let loose. The arrow slams into your quarry's right breast, and it collapses, silently. In fact, you're rather surprised how lucky you seemed to be- the arrow must have slid between the creature's ribs. Quickly, you make your way over to it, making sure it was dead and recovering your arrow. Well. That was much easier than the rest of your trip had been. You could drag it all the way down to Helved, the butcher, you should get some coins for the creature's sinew and hide, or you could butcher it here for free. You're not... extremely good at butchering, but it'd be less to carry...

>> No.21656292

Might as well drag it back for money. I'm sure we need more money.

>> No.21656296

Drag that motherfcuker!

>> No.21656300

Rolled 51

Well, no time like present to learn

>> No.21656350

You huff, before tying your quarry's legs together, slinging it on your shoulder, and then you look southwards again. Up to Waymoor.

A day and a half later, you huff again, as you finally find yourself on the road, as you enter the village, sitting next to a large lake. The blacksmith, Kalveer, waves you over.
"Abel." The burly gray man said. He seemed unusually sad, as opposed to his normally boisterous nature. He patted at his apron. "You're back. I have some... bad news for you."

>> No.21656351

I don't want there to be more smelly blood then necessary what with there being predators around and all. Butchering it now would make a giant mess that attracts predators.

>> No.21656361

"What happened, Kalveer?"

>> No.21656371


Someone died, right? Our mother?

>> No.21656375

Rolled 97

I know, 5 days and only this wiry deer? It's terrible news.

>> No.21656409

I'm betting on bandits taking our sister.

>> No.21656418

"FFFFuck." You say. "What happened, Kalveer?"
"Well..." He said. "It was your mother. She's never been the healthiest, so when she was talking with me the other day, she simply... fell. We buried her the day before yesterday, and your sister... left. She didn't even wait for you. I'm... I'm sorry, lad."

>> No.21656419

What is this, overgeneric tvtropes fantasyquest?

Our mother dying would be pretty fucking fail.

>> No.21656426

"What? Where did she go? Did she say why?"

>> No.21656427

You know, OP, I heard you were good and I really tried. Maybe next time you won't make the opening such a reeking pile of shit.

>> No.21656455


God damn.
Take in the information, sit down. Silently deal with the elk butchering/selling. Visit mothers grave later.

>> No.21656487


>> No.21656488

Your toys
Put them back in the pram

>> No.21656528

>I probably should've named this overgeneric tvtropes fantasyquest instead, heh.

"What?" You ask, the quarry on your shoulder all but forgotten. You take a seat. "Where did she go? Did she say why?"
"Some of the knights were visiting, and she left to join them. She said that she didn't have anything else, and... that the Order of Kristoph took anyone." He said.
Silently, you get to your feet, and make your way to Helved. The wiry man doesn't say anything as you dump your elk on him, recognizing your expression as he takes a knife to it.
"What do you plan to do now?" He asked, meeting your eyes. "Stay here, maybe become an apprentice, or... you could go south, I guess. Become a city boy, or maybe a feyhunter, like your sister."
The butcher seems to notice your sword, but says nothing about it.

>> No.21656534

What's to elaborate? Pacing problems that alienate players on chargen with ten minutes to make a definitive decision followed by a dramatic moment that is entirely wasted by boring shit followed by the most common of tropes.

Literally the most exciting moment of the story so far was wasted first when we went back out into the world and found it...boring. Then, it was wasted again when we were given nothing in the way of a stand-out environment.

There's such a thing as an elegant way to frame a setting, so as to avoid the sheer degree of overwrought fantasy in many /tg/ quest threads. There's going for simplicity, for the sake of not having another high-magic snooze-fest. But this is just having your chain yanked and not being given much for motivation except retreads.

>> No.21656554

"I don't know.

I'll have to think about it."

>> No.21656567

"I don't know. She was right about us not having anything else here, but..."

>> No.21656578

"I guess I should probably catch up with her..."

>> No.21656602

"I suppose I'll see about chasing after my fool sister. I don't mind her doing her own thing, but I won't have her leaving without so much as a goodbye. Besides that, there's the matter of her portion of the inheritance.
Damn it all, this would have been so much easier to deal with if she had simply stayed for a few days longer."

>> No.21656605


>> No.21656622

This is painful Exabyte it really is. The sad part is this quest will continue due to the well established fan base. this is quest is shit and terrible if it was anyone but you this quest would of died for good reason.

>> No.21656662

So what, you expected us to come out of the cave and find a t-rex or something?
This character is a nobody in a tiny village out in the hicks. Of course we aren't going to start out as anything special. That was kinda the point of this quest, that the MC doesn't have some reality shattering power and is not anything special (at first).

>> No.21656669

You're full of it. The momentum stopped because the players wanted to play it safe, that's hardly Exa's fault.
If this was just a book I would agree with you fully, but Exa doesn't have total creative control here. A quest relies on feedback.

>> No.21656698

"I don't know." You say. "I'll have to think about it. But I suppose I'll see about chasing after my fool sister. I don't mind her doing her own thing, but I won't have hear leaving without so much as a goodbye."
"You'd best." He said. "Lyra's always been like that, though. Running from her problems."
He shrugged, and then started hacking at your quarry. "This thing's pretty scrawny." He said. "Are you going to want the meat, or are you selling that too?" He asked.

>> No.21656714


take enough meat for ourself since we don't have anyone to feed anymore.

Go visit mothers grave. Then go home and grieve, I suppose.

>> No.21656719

"I suppose I'll need some for the journey. Could I trade it for some dried meat?"

>> No.21656781

I don't really see any motivation to follow our sister to be honest

>> No.21656795

Because she's still family.

>> No.21656798

Good point, apart from curiosity anyway, but do we have a motivation to do something else?

>> No.21656803

There's no reason to go join her and the knights, but since she ran off before we came back, we should go talk to her at least.

>> No.21656807

She's our sister. Our only family left, I believe.

>> No.21656811

I mean personally... as a player.

>> No.21656825

Because some of us don't play in such a meta way.

>> No.21656840

I'd also like to point out that this a potentially very unhealthy way to resolve her problems. We should probably make sure that she's doing it for the right reasons.

>> No.21656854

Pretty much this.

>> No.21656874


How else could you justify going after her? Saying she's family doesn't really count it because we know literally NOTHING about her. She and our mother could have been random strangers as far as I'm concerned. There is no connection to the characters.
Maybe we hated our sister our whole life because she was a massive cunt and can't give a rats ass about her even if we tried? Maybe we respect her enough that we don't bother her with her choices? Maybe she always wanted to join that order and has been training for it for years?
Why is it that we MUST go to her and (presumably) stop her?

>> No.21656877

aaaaaaw shit, it's exabyte, I need to check twitter more often

I'm for following our sister, it will keep our minds off of what just happened for one, being 18 in a world with our father having already passed, I'm sure we are mature enough to have already known our mother would pass soon. Sure, feel a bit sad about it, she was our mother, but don't let it interfere with our own decisions.

>> No.21656899

From the replies, I don't think it's so much as wanting to stop her, as much as find her, and make sure she is doing something she wants to do and not just simply jumping on the nearest thing to distract herself.

>> No.21656901

Because the default feeling for family is at least a bit of care and/or love.
Until we get an indication that this is not the case, our feelings for her defaults.
Also there's no other hooks.

>> No.21656917

>Sorry I'm being rather shit right now, guys. Things aren't picking up as quickly as I'd expected.

>> No.21656926

So I'm not this anon here with his punctuation allergy: >>21656622
Nor am I this cunt: >>21656534
But it strikes me that putting the blame on the players for the questgiver following up an exciting thing (found a weird mural, and a sword in a collapsing cave! (barely got out alive too, holy shit!)) by a boring thing (you can't use the sword because you suck, so have a useless piece of metal. oh look, wolves.) is putting a design decision, however good or bad, on the user.

>> No.21656936



>> No.21656937

It's ok!

>> No.21656952

"I suppose I'll need some for the journey." You say. "Could I trade it for some dried meat?"
"Yeah, I can do that." The butcher said. A few minutes later, you had your wrapped rations and a few bronze coins. Slipping them into your pack, you turn and make your way out of his butchery, silently.

You sit on a bluff, overlooking the small graveyard where your mother was buried, a simple wooden T stuck into the ground. For a moment, some heavy weight sets on your heart.

"Hey." A voice says, and you find yourself already rolling your eyes. "Abel. Get up."
You get to your feet, and turn about. Gabriel stands there, an old, gray man with a sword on his hip. "Stop moping." He said, knocking his fist against your shoulder. "So your ma's dead and your sister ran away to go burn witches or whatever. Big whoop. You know how to use that thing?" He asked, nodding to your sword. "Where'd you even find it?"

>> No.21656957

Just...just try and learn from this, would you? That's all we can ask.

>> No.21656958

Yeah, that seems to be the case but it is rather... bland, uninspiring..

I guess so but still, it feels like we are jumping to the conclusion that she is making a mistake and want to talk her out of it.

Besides, she didn't even WAIT for us to come back after our mothers death, that should tell a lot about our relationship with our sister. I mean, what the fuck, really? How much do you have to disrespect your sibling to not be there for him after his only parent dies?

>> No.21656970


"No, no I don't. I found it in the woods while hunting."

>> No.21656972


>> No.21656989

refer to
>"You'd best." He said. "Lyra's always been like that, though. Running from her problems."
in >>21656698
that right there tells us that she tends to do this, which is why we are going to make sure she isn't going to be abandoned and lost because of simply jumping on the nearest thing to distract her, maybe mother's death put some conviction in her bones, we don't know, we weren't here when it happened.

>> No.21656990

>Do you even lift? See >21656698

"I don't know." You say. "I'll have to think about it. But I suppose I'll see about chasing after my fool sister. I don't mind her doing her own thing, but I won't have hear leaving without so much as a goodbye."
"You'd best." He said. "Lyra's always been like that, though. Running from her problems."

She may or may not be running away from her problems in this instance. That is why we want to go find out what's up.

>> No.21657011

Someone who runs away from their problems may certainly want to run away from their brother who would make them face them.

>> No.21657042

stop patronizing, if you don't want to participate then don't
I will say that this quest started a bit blander than usual compared to Exa's normal, but that is okay, that might be a characteristic of the character and setting compared to the others. If it tells us anything with setting overlaps and what not Exa is so and not so fond of, Abel was just a regular guy in NFCQ that eventually found out that he was exceptionally good at something and was pulled into it due to his crazy disappeared then revived roomate.

Found it in a hole, and can't a man grieve his mother passing.

>> No.21657076

"No, no I don't." You say, affixing him with a glare. "I found it in the woods while hunting."
"Tch, that's boring." He said. "Oh well. Anyway, I was thinking." He said. "You have a sword, I have a sword... You and me both go down to some big road, wait for some fat traders to come by, then we just wiggle around our swords a bit, and have 'em start sweating gold."

>> No.21657101

"Right, because some fat traders won't have some actual guards on duty, and there is nothing wrong with robbing threatening them with violence."

>> No.21657107


But what problems exactly? I haven't heard about any problems she must have dealt with that she ran away from.
Mother dying? It doesn't make problems, it could have removed one of the greatest burden she must have had for few years (Mother sick, someone has to tend to her, etc).
As far as I can see the only 'problem' was waiting for her brother to come back home.

She could have waited and have us decide together what to do but noooo she ran away from her 'problems'.
Personally, if something like this had happened to me, I would have been mighty pissed off.

That's the problem, we're hearing basically the only thing we know about our "dear" sister from tertiary character who might be exaggerating.

Think about it for a while and then go "Nahhh"

>> No.21657113

"W-what? I don't..."

>> No.21657124


>> No.21657149

>"Tch, that's boring."
Did you just hang a lampshade on the complaints of the playerbase, thinking that'd do the job, and then continue with the fuckstupid?

I guess it's a good thing people are feeling patronized already.

>> No.21657150

"Not my sort of thing. You want to get run through by some merchant guards, be my guest."

>> No.21657152

you are free to ask Exabyte what we know about our sister if you really want to, but Exabyte is a good enough quest runner to give us information as we come across it and develop a character that we are playing from just our reactions to what we find and make it a more believable character by positioning those reactions to the character as if they were always there

>> No.21657163

"I need to visit home, at least."

>> No.21657174

>this guy

Go ahead and link me an archived thread there, tripfag.

>> No.21657176

Well, "I found it in the forest" IS a pretty boring story.

"Banditry? I suppose that's one option."

>> No.21657198

Don't be too hard on him. This is his first quest where we start out mundane.

>> No.21657205

Hey, you said something obvious! Good for you, you get a gold star.

Whether or not it is a boring story, confirming it as such and then rolling out another crap tweest rather than using the opportunity to make it better is disingenuous.

>> No.21657221


Pretty much all of these. Granted, both of those quests start out very differently from this. I assume Exabyte is trying out a new thing. It doesn't seem to be working quite as well as we'd all like, but he's trying.

>> No.21657226

Maybe OP should stick to what he's good at for a while longer.

>> No.21657233

Hell no, we're not doing banditry!

And we got better things on our mind than that.

>> No.21657234

Hey. Hey buddy. People say obvious things. It is entirely reasonable for this guy to say it too.

>> No.21657238

I guess I could, but here you go

>> No.21657246

> rolling out another crap tweest rather than using the opportunity to make it better
Isn't that the point of a twist?

Or have you just given up and decided to bitch for today?
>facetious yeeksty

>> No.21657259

Oh, I remember those. Those were pretty uninspired, if they'd been running at the same time as Vedibere's stuff the threads would have been fucking ghost towns except for diehard fans.

Which you're one of, aren't you?

>> No.21657274

So you're just talking out your ass, huh?

>> No.21657275


Actually, if we could get a paragraph or two devoted to our family then I could see the choice having any sense.

>> No.21657281

"Right, because some fat traders won't have some actual guards on duty, and there is nothing wrong with robbing threatening them with violence." You say.
"We just have to kill the guards first." He said. "Or scare them off."
"Banditry? I suppose that's one option. Not my sort of thing." You say. "You want to get run through by some merchant guards, be my guest."
"We'll be rich, see." He said. "And one guy can't take on an entire caravan. At the very least, one person could distract 'em while the second sneaks in and takes the gold. Or... something."
"I'm not doing banditry." You say.
"Well, then, I see no reason not to shove you off this cliff and take your sword. I already decided I'm leaving this piece of shit village, and I can always use the coin I'd get for selling something like that.

>> No.21657294

and the ignoring of the troll begins
and before you say you aren't a troll and we are trolling for not taking your "legitimate" opinions, subtly and not so subtly insulting people because we like what you don't like is a form of trolling

>> No.21657296

Reasonable? Because the criticism of the character's action was about it being unreasonable? Wait, no it wasn't. It was that it was poorly chosen by the author, like the rest of the core content on display here.

The point of a twist is obvious, it was more that the plot twist in this case was just as crap and mundane as anything else rather than used properly to make something of the utterly monotonous circumstances.

>> No.21657321

"Are you going to fight me for it?"

>> No.21657323

"Think you can win, old man?"
Shift away from the cliff, hand on sword.

>> No.21657325

Oh please, people fled Vedibere's quests like they were a fucking plague once they were popular enough for the idiot population of /tg/ to start ruining them. And in the amount of time it took him to update we could have played 3 other quests.

>> No.21657326

Nah, you're just a fan of sucking OP's dick is what it is. You have been for the entirety of his contributions and can no more tell that it's a dick and tastes of dick than all the motherfuckers participating in MSQ.

In the end, none of this is for your consumption, it's to give OP a chance to mend his fucking ways.

>> No.21657328

"You're being an idiot"

"Who's not to say that I wont skewer you with this sword? I know that your not proficient at sword-fighting either."

>> No.21657329

"I swear to (insert deity or pantheon or whatever of setting) Gabriel, you are as annoying as you are persistent. If you try to do that I would just put a damn arrow between your eyes. Besides, aren't you a bit old for the whole banditry thing?"

>> No.21657359

wait, he's standing right next to us
we wont be able to shoot him with an arrow

>> No.21657365

They were nevertheless popular, which is the keyword there.

At least the arguments were about things people genuinely felt motivated about, as opposed to sitting through a series of false choices.

Charge headlong into a numerically superior horde of beasts y/n?
Your mom died, follow only remaining family y/n?
Be a bandit when you have no motivation to and there are armed forces in the area that may be policing it y/n?


>> No.21657383

So why are you still here?

>> No.21657397


>> No.21657406

I'm here because I haven't saged this yet.

>> No.21657410

this is true, I guess nonchalantly and cautiously walk away from cliff and Gabriel while talking to him, when I say nonchalantly I mean be ready to draw the fucking sword until we get some distance

>> No.21657415

"Think you can win, old man?" You ask, getting to your feet, putting a hand on the sword's hilt. You edge away from the cliff, getting some distance. "You're being an idiot. Who's to say that I won't skewer you with this sword?"
"Because you can't. You told me that you don't know how to use it." He said. "And I know a damn sight more than that."
"Besides, aren't you a bit old for the whole banditry thing?"
"Yep. But not when you're young at heart!" He responded, and drew his sword. "Well, let's see you skewer me, then."

>> No.21657430

All of this could have been avoided if we had chose to be a badass horned beast man thing.
Or a thin, lanky dude with a spear.

>> No.21657438

Rolled 19

skewer him. We aren't good enough to do anything fancy like disarming.

>> No.21657445

Rolled 40


>> No.21657450

Rolled 70

roll away, grab a rock and throw at him?

>> No.21657455

Rolled 77

Stab him in his leg.

>> No.21657456

Do we still have the bow? And how far are we from town? We can always run back if the bow/sword fails.

>> No.21657457

And now we're beating up an old guy. I think I'm starting to agree with the trolls.

>> No.21657467

Ready bow, "Back off."

>> No.21657480

Rolled 96

Well using a damn sword can't be that hard, don't try to block, just try to dodge, and hit him

>> No.21657486

ITT: playerbase is absolutely retarded, OP can't do anything right.

>> No.21657495

An old guy who started it.
An old bandit at that.

>> No.21657604

You quickly draw your sword, still unused to the weight in your palm, and you give it a few practice swings. Using a sword can't be that hard...

He takes a step forward, swinging his blade, you dodge out of the way, as he chuckled. The old madman shrugged, and tried again. You raise your own blade, and the two swords clashed, as you tried to pull away and give him a few cuts for his trouble.
"You can do better, lad!" Gabriel said, effortlessly parrying your blows. In response, you gritted your teeth, and put more strength into your blow, jarring your hand. "Come on, use your wrist more!"

After a few minutes of this, you slowed, and took a wary look at him. He raised an eyebrow.
"So, you want to come with yet?" He asked. "If you don't want to do banditry, we could go do something else. Mercenaries, maybe? I hear those guys get a lot of gold."

>> No.21657635


"I'm thinking of seeking out my sister, talk to her for a bit and see what's up.
Mercenaries sounds better than banditry, I'll think about it.

Why are you so dead set on leaving this place anyway?"

>> No.21657640

"Mercenary work sounds a lot better than banditry, but I need to find my fool sister before I do anything."

>> No.21657642

Why don't we just give him the damn thing? I hate to waste it, but It's not like we need the thing to find our sister. We can hunt. Fuck travelling with him, Gabe's a douche.

>> No.21657653

Rolled 80

Mercenaries? I could, I guess. But why not the Order? Seems like the same work, but more interesting.

>I don't know what the order actually does.

>> No.21657662

"I need to find out what happened to my sister...but gold would probably help in that mission. Do you know of any mercenary opportunities nearby?

>> No.21657711

Rolled 68

How about this then, instead of robbing fat traders, we guard the fat traders, at least seems more reasonable and I have no bloody idea how to use this damn thing so a good eye with a bow will at least be useful till I learn. Also, what the hell is the point of using a sword when a man with a bow can just take a man with a sword from a set of paces away easily.

>> No.21657734

"Mercenary work sounds a lot better than banditry." You say, keeping an eye on his blade. "But I need to find my fool sister before I do anything."
"Oh, good point." He said, shrugging. "Sure, then let's go find your sister."
"Why are you so dead set on leaving this place anyway?"
"Can't a man have his own secrets?" He asked, grinning. You don't grin back.
"Do you know of any mercenary opportunities nearby?"
"Nah, we'd have to go down to the city. Sardin's where we'll find work, and that's probably where Lyra and those
Order jerks are going."
"Why not the order? Seems like the same work, but more interesting."
"Ah, right." He said, and chuckled. "I forget that you don't know much about the order. Living in a small village does that to you. They're witchhunters. Wander from place to place burning little innocent girls alive with hardly any evidence. It's all religious or something."

>> No.21657753

Rolled 17

And my sister signed up?!

>> No.21657760

"That's... not pleasant at all."

>> No.21657811

"That's... not pleasant at all." You say. "And my sister signed up?!"
"Well, they don't *say* that's what they do." He said. "They talk about 'eradicating evil' and such. I'm sure they believe it. Oh well. It's not my problem. When did you want to leave to go be mercenaries?"

>> No.21657854

"Probably tomorrow. I still need to deal with the house before I go."

>> No.21657941

yeah, we should check our home first before going
grab few things or whatever.

>> No.21657993


maybe sell some stuff too

>> No.21658038

"Probably tomorrow." You say, still wary. "I still need to deal with the house before I go."
"Oh, good point." He said, chuckling. He slid his sword back into his belt. "I have some things to deal with, too."
He nodded to you, gave you a sloppy salute, and then made his way back down the road, to the city proper.
You don't know much about Gabriel. He's always been there, but always on his own. You'd never really talked to him before.
You look down to the graveyard again, before making your way further up the bluff, up to your home.

It was almost empty, with all three beds in a single room, a shelf with a few keepsakes, and a chest on the other end of the room. A simple, unused stove sat in the corner, ready for winter. Already, you see that Lyra's belongings were gone, and your mother's belongings... they were still there. Some simple silver jewelry, a small portrait, some wooden carvings you'd made for her when you were younger...
You find yourself sitting on one of the beds for a moment, before shaking it off and opening the chest. Inside were your own belongings. Your entire savings; two gold coins, a dozen silver, some old leathers, arrows, and clothing, mostly. Everything else is either a knick-knack that has no use, or it's something so old you can't remember where you got it. Valueless, most of it.

>> No.21658134

>"Your parents are dead and you sister ran away but who cares."
>"Let's become criminals and rob people!"
>"You don't want to? Well now I'm threatening to kill you and robbing you!"
>"What, you are able to defend yourself? You know I was just joking. How about change my attitude completly without telling my reasons for even suddenly leaving this place and promise to help you instead. Lets take a hike in the woods to do so. Alone. I won't kill you in your sleep. Promise! And I most certainly don't want to leave suddenly because I was caught doing something criminal!"

Am I the only one who thinks this is a really bad idea?

Take everything of sentimental or monetary value that won't hinder our travels. Is there someone who could take care of things while we are away? Or a friend of yourself or your parents you could give the house and unmoving stuff to (partially for safekeeping, partially as compensation for the effort)

>> No.21658136

Start crying and cry for a moment. Then gather your stuff and two wooden carvings

>> No.21658146

Rolled 48

Keep the jewelry and some other pocketable knicknacks and leave the rest? Can we sell the house?

>> No.21658157

Nope, you aren't. That Gab fella is seriously suspicious. I say we sneak away as soon as possible.

>> No.21658191

What, did you come here from /a/?

>> No.21658209

You simply sat there for a few moments, and then you just... lay back, and close your eyes for a moment, swamped with memories of your mother playing with a fox, back when you were a child. Before you know it, you start sniffling, your sight blurring. You shake yourself up, take some of the carvings, and all of the jewelry and knicknacks. You start considering who you could leave the house to while you're gone... but Kalveer's the only choice. He's always been dependable, and he'd never shy away from helping you if you needed it.


Something.... says, reverberating through your head. You open your eyes, and dart around, trying to find out where that strange voice had come from, looking this way and that. Eventually, your eyes dart down to the blade, and in it's reflection, you see something... something that looked like an enormous eye, staring back at you.


>> No.21658241

"What the hell?"

>> No.21658248

"W-what?" Stand up, let sword drop.

>> No.21658249

hello sword

>> No.21658256

Well, the coinage and the leathers are bound to be useful, as well as the arrows and some extra clothes. Mom's jewelry, as crass as it sounds, could net some cash if we need it and is portable, and the portrait and carvings could be things to remember her by.

I say we bundle up the stuff we're taking with and then leg it. If Gabriel doesn't catch up...well, that may not be a bad thing.

>> No.21658291

Rub eyes, stare at sword.

>> No.21658294


Also, if we'd have gone Sentinel, we could have would have had easier time saving Azure from the Void/Outside/Whatever it's called

>> No.21658318

"W-what?" You ask, and drop the sword.

OW. The all encompassing voice said, entirely deadpan.

You stick your fingers in your ears, trying to block the sound.

The second voice spoke up again, booming through your fingers.
It was swiftly interrupted by the first voice again, shushing it.
You rub at your eyes, staring down at the sword, before you shake your head. You make sure to take the portrait, as a keepsake, and continue packing, trying your best to ignore the strange voices.

>> No.21658344

While packing
"How the hell did all of you end up in there?"

>> No.21658356

"This is some sort of dream, right? I'm still in the forest after hitting my head on a branch, or something, and my mom isn't dead, and my sister hasn't gone off to join a bunch of witch hunters."

>> No.21658377

"I'm insane. I've gone crazy. Mom's death and Lyra joining the Order and then Gabriel and I've finally cracked."

>> No.21658378

God-dammit, Exabyte. Why don't you just double down on the pat bullshit and write us a riveting bit of Monty Python style comedy, it's not like that's overdone?

We fall on our sword, that's what we do.

>> No.21658391

oh, do they fight crime?

>> No.21658445

"How the hell did all of you end up in there?"


"This is some sort of dream, right? I'm still in the forest after hitting my head after hitting my head on a branch, or something, and my mom isn't dead, and my sister hasn't gone off to join a bunch of witch hunters."


"I'm insane." You say. "I've gone crazy. Mom's death and Lyra joining the Order and then Gabriel and I've finally cracked."


>> No.21658478

You do realize he'd just continue on from the sword's perspective if we die, right?

>> No.21658487

"Damn it all. What do you even want with me?"

>> No.21658513

Evxne? Eh...Ehvecksneh? Ehvexine? E-Vixen?

I can't even imagine pronouncing that.

>> No.21658531

"So is it just the two of you in there?"

>> No.21658532

Fuck you, OP. Fuck you with a rake. Look at the wonderful responses your storytelling has produced because of your railroading bullshit, they include a player electing to cry and another one suggesting we rub our eyes and stare at something.

This is the sure sign of time passing, of content-free bullshit going on while you struggle to establish an interesting theme. There is little genuine choice granted by your writing and all we have is post after post of expository crap. Why did you think this was a good idea?

You're only getting praise because you have previously created the ugly beasts we know as fanboys. Look at your fanboys protect you from criticism, look at your sycophants tell you how awesome you are.

I would honestly not be surprised if you're just fucking with them to see how much more they'll take. Fuck this, I hope there's a better quest thread on this board next monday but now I've wasted my time trying to get you past your expository dumps. Time to sleep and await my next reentry into the shitty working world...maybe I was wrong to expect decent entertainment from a monday quest after all.

>> No.21658536

I'd pronounce it ev-znee

>> No.21658563

"Well, fuck it, then." We have our stuff collected, yes? Dive into the madness and head for Intercept with the sister.

Which is probably a bad idea what with magic talking sword and witch hunters, but what the hell ever.

It's unpronounceable.

Fuck off. Yes, it's not up to his usual standard. He's trying to bootstrap it. Stop bitching and work with the man.

>> No.21658624

I guess you're fucking illiterate or something, but I've been working with the man since the beginning of the thread and am now no richer for it because I have to go back to toiling in the fucking salt mines come dawn tomorrow.

Were this a better thread, I'd at least have that to think about while doing a job I'm unqualified for due to the physical disability I can't admit to the state because that means eighteen months of waiting in homeless shelters until they decide to clothe and feed you.

I really look forward to good quest threads, they provide an escape from my misery just like for the next guy. If this one were good, I could spend my time tomorrow thinking about how well or badly it went and planning for the next one, maybe wondering about some enigmatic shit in it. But all I have now is a few hours of wasted time.

I wish he'd just put up a disclaimer to kick this whole thing off that said 'if you expected anything like my previous work, go away until thread 8 or so.'

>> No.21658630

>Fuck you too, with a bigger rake. I tried starting things a different way than I usually do, and it didn't work, but I'm not going to quit without at least trying to make it work. You say I'm railroading, but all you've suggested is ranting on about how I'm a shitty OP and such instead of making suggestions. This isn't up to my usual standard, and I'm trying to do my best to recover what may be unrecoverable. Yeah, I fucked up, and yes, I'm incredibly boring right now. I get that and I'm trying to fix it. Fuck off.

"Eh... Ehvecksneh? Ehvexine? E-vixen? Damn it all." You say. "Is it just the two of you in there?"
You press on the bridge of your nose. "Well, fuck it, then."
You sheath the sword, sling your belongings onto your back, and make your way out of the empty cabin. After a short talk with Kalveer, in which he promises to take good care of your home, you take a look at the road south. It seems entirely abandoned- if you planned on waiting for Gabriel, here's where you would probably wait. But do you really want to?

>> No.21658633

Actually we're in the IRC telling him this isn't good and trying to give him new ideas.

Because constructive criticism doesn't mean taking a shit on someone.

>> No.21658660

Nope. Let's get all lone wanderer up in this shit.

>> No.21658665

It's called choice, OP. If you want to fix it, you can't do it by failing to exceed the grasp of your writing abilities. None of that shit matters if all we get is exposition.

I'm done now, because your response to fairly simple critique is 'fuck off, I'm trying SO HARD.' But just in case anyone else has hopes I now no longer possess: let them run free for a while. Engage THEM. Don't make them engage YOU.

>> No.21658668

Boo fucking hoo?

>> No.21658684

Neither does it mean giving him shitty ideas. No amount of ideas will make up for being unable to engage the audience. Railroading isn't fixed by more creative railroading.

>> No.21658701

I agree. Gabriel's more than he's worth.

>> No.21658708

Because dismissing the troll's crappy life will prove him wrong!

Seriously, just ignore him.

>> No.21658712

Rolled 95

Can't call them both sword.

>> No.21658713

More trouble, that is.

>> No.21658720

>go fuck yourself with a rake OP! Everything sucks forever! FIX IT NOW!
>fairly simple critique

So I assume your disability is mental?

>> No.21658738

If Gabriel is serious about not intending to screw us, well, he knows where we're going. He can catch up.

>> No.21658760

>anon asks questgiver for more choices
>pandering to individual taste
>more choices

If you're going to countertroll, could you not suck at it?

>> No.21658800

Stop bitching at each other and either contribute or GTFO. Sage for belligerence and OT.

>> No.21658831

You don't hesitate. Not even for a moment. Gabriel can't be good news, threatening to shove you off a cliff one moment and trying to help you the next- you simply walk, leaving the small village nestled within the pass, as you make your way down the road.

Your descent is fairly uneventful, as the sun makes it's trek across the sky. Leaving the mountains behind, you enter the plains, eying the city far in the distance.

It'll be another day to walk all the way there, but that's most likely where your sister is heading. As you enter the next village, one who's name you don't quite remember- Beybrook, maybe- you hear a bloodcurdling scream.

Making your way to the point the scream emanated from, the village center, you see a crowd of people, surrounding something. A head higher than everyone else, you see the heavy plate armor of a knight, standing there silently, a full helm covering his head, as he stands in the center, next to what looks like the top of a pyre.

"Please, please, be calm." The knight said, shushing the villagers. "She's simply a girl. I sense no evil inside of her. There's no need-"

"She's a witch! I caught her stealing bread, and the next day, my entire granary was full of mice!" A rather belligerent woman said, railing at the knight.

>> No.21658850

Ignore, look around town for an inn if it's starting to get dark.

>> No.21658858

Rolled 85

This is more like it. Mingle with the crowd while moving towards the center. Abel has a weakness for girls, so long as they aren't you know, blowing his shit up.

>> No.21658859

Oh, FUCK no. We're siding with the Knight here.

>> No.21658874

Rolled 14

Try to slink into the crowd, Get close to the front.

>> No.21658878

I think we should walk up and agree with the knight. Try to be a voice of reason.

The knight probably might be involved in the Order and might be able to help us with our sister locating problem, also we could end up travelling with him which is good because we're less likely to be fucked with if we're by a guy in full plate.

"Miss, it's a granary. Mice do their best to go in places like that. Are you sure you didn't leave the door open?"

>> No.21658948

Right. Lets become a squire!

>> No.21659000

You slink into the crowd, trying to get to the front- you see the woman, the knight, and a rather small girl, hands tied to the pyre, tinder already placed beneath.

"Miss, it's a granary. Mice do their best to go in places like that." You say, your voice dry. "Are you sure you didn't leave the door open?"
"There were more mice than there was grain." She responded, turning her ire to you.
The young girl looked from you to the knight... as the knight cut her loose.
"Yes, there's no reason to harm her." The knight said. "Everybody, go back to your homes."
"Especially you, miss." The knight said pointedly. Grumbling, the villagers started to disperse, leaving you, the girl, and the knight, alone in the town center.
"I'm sorry, lass, that I didn't get here earlier." The knight told the girl.
In response, she hid behind you, perfectly quiet.
"Ah, I suppose you're her father? Brother?" The knight said. "I'm Ser Crios."
He held his gauntlet out, as if to shake hands.

>> No.21659038

Ser knight, I don't know who this girl is at all. She seems rather attached to me for some reason though....

>> No.21659058

"Nice to meet you. Abel.

Never met her in my life, just happened across it, same as you I suppose."

>> No.21659066

I'm just passing through, Knight. I'm looking for my sister, I think she joined your order?"

>> No.21659092

"just chivalry in plain clothes ser, what brings you to our quaint village?" turn to the girl "are you ok?"

>> No.21659108

(i thought she joined the witch hunters? where they knights?)

>> No.21659144

"Abel. No relation, so far as I'm aware."

>> No.21659158

"Ser knight, I don't know who this girl is at all." You say. "I'm just passing through. I'm looking for my sister, I think she joined your order?"
"Ah, you're Lyra's brother? Yes, she went to become an initiate. Seemed rather distressed, though, but it wasn't my place to speak with her."
The girl didn't say anything, and you turn to her. "Are you okay?"
She didn't respond, silently staring at the knight.

>> No.21659196

"Come on, thank the nice knight. He saved you"

>> No.21659213

"Well, if you see her let her know I'm looking for her. I might pay her a visit, we don't have any other family. Where would I find her?"

Then crouch down by the girl and kindly ask her name.

>> No.21659221

An attempt at constructive criticism:
- Describe people/things as they are introduced if the protagonist knows them already. It is hard to make in character decisions if we don't stuff that the protagonist should be aware of (This problem was, to a lesser extent, present in your previous quest as well but I ignored it as I only caught up with your quests when circumstances already told me enough to make guesses)
- Important decisions need some hint that they are important and need more time for discussion if there are enough people to actually discuss them. Given your reputation there is no lack of players.[/spoiler ] This refers to the initial and seemingly important decision to be the swordsman.

There was other stuff already mentioned by others which I don't want to repeat.

"Do you know where my sister is at the moment?"

>> No.21659239

"Would you like us to escort you home?"

Also, ask Mr. Chivalry to show us to our sis.

>> No.21659241

so what's with all this hubbub about witches and the sorts, I just left my town and all of a sudden this sort of thing happens in front of me, my village didn't really have the happenings of this sort

>> No.21659269


Uh..... I think she might be frightened of you, ser Crios. (turn towards the girl and put ourselves between her and the knight) What's your name huh?

>> No.21659281

I can't quite figure out why, but, I have a sneaking suspicion I know who's in our sword...

>> No.21659336

"Do you know where my sister is at the moment?" You ask.
"She, and the rest of the knights we were traveling with, were going south, to Sardin city, to restock and resupply before they go further south, to Anvgard, the heart of the order." He said. "If you travel quickly, you may be able to catch her and speak with her before they set off."

You turn to the girl for a moment.
"Come on, thank the nice knight. He saved you."
"... Um, thank you." She squeaked, quietly.
"It's no problem." He said.
"Uh, I think she might be frightened of you, Ser Crios." You say. You turn towards the girl and kneel down to her level.
"What's your name, huh?"
"It's Ariana." She said, still quietly.
"Would you like us to escort you home?"
"Um... I'll be fine." She said, eyes wide. "M-maybe."

>> No.21659349

"Where do you live, Ariana?"

>> No.21659363

"It's okay Ariana, if you're scared of anything you can tell us."

>> No.21659369


Where do you live sweetheart?
(please don't be an orphan please don't be an orphan please don't be an orphan)

>and Aliance

captcha wants to take her with us I guess

>> No.21659420

"It's okay, Ariana." You say. "If you're scared of anything, you can tell us."
"I'm not scared." She said, her dark red hair flaring out. "I'll be fine."
"Where do you live?"
"Um, Heaminster. Village." She added.

"That's a rather far way." Crios noted. "Weeks away. How'd you get all the way up here?"
She shied away from him again, as she hid behind you.
"... Sorry, miss, I suppose I'll take my leave."

>> No.21659459

"Which way are you heading, Crios? Is Heaminster along the way to Sardin?"

>> No.21659466


Wait ser Crios, are you heading on to Sardin? If so, can you inform my sister that I wish to talk to her and that I'll be in Sardin shortly? I have to make sure little Ariana here gets back to her home safely.

C'mon guys, we can't just leave her.

>> No.21659473

second this

>> No.21659523

Rolled 28

When Ciros leaves, ask Ariana why she is scared of him.

>> No.21659535

(im guessing she actually is a witch)

>> No.21659540

"Which way are you heading, Crios? Is Heaminster along the way to Sardin?"
"It's past Sardin." He said. "But yes, in that direction, and yes, I'm going there."
"If so, can you inform my sister that I wish to talk to her, and that I'll be in Sardin shortly? I have to make sure that little Ariana gets back to her home safely."
"I can do that." He said. "A pity I only have one horse, lest I'd let you and the girl use it."

>> No.21659551

Hopefully. Maybe she can help us annoy the sword.

>> No.21659601

Are you leaving today Crios? (What's the time by the way?)

>> No.21659610

well if ariana is even heading back home ill take you up on that offer thank you.
we havent even asked is shes heading home r running from it.
that would be fun lolz

>> No.21659614


Thank you Ser Crios. I think I'll buy some extra provisions for Ariana and then head out. We'll need some extra emergency rations and and a blanket or two.(subtlety hint that he should leave before us so we can get some answers out of Ariana).

>> No.21659645

>Also, here's an extremely shitty map giving you an idea

"Are you leaving today, Ser Crios?" You ask, looking up to the sky. It would be sundown soon, and only a fool would set out now...
"That was the intention, yes." He responded.

>> No.21659655

>Idea of the distances involved, I mean. I swear, I'll make better versions later that are less ad-hoc.

>> No.21659697

its decent enough exabyte lolz

"ser crios could you give us a minute to speak this over with ariana? i promise to be as hasty as possible"

>> No.21659699

"In the night? In any case, I hope I'll see you again in Sardin if I make it in time."

>> No.21659709

"It's just about sundown and you're planning on travelling in the dark.

Well, I usually try to travel when it's light out, just a good precaution to make.

Safe travels and all that."

>> No.21659758

"In the night?" You ask. "I usually try to travel when it's light out. Just a good precaution to make."
"I will be safe enough." He said. "I'm quite used to travelling at night, as is my mount."
He nodded to you, and banged his hand against his chest. Ariana jumped as he did. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Abel. Ariana. I depart."
He nodded again, and then made his way toward a small shed, where he no doubt left his horse.
"In any case, I hope I'll see you again in Sardin if I make it in time." You call out, and he nods, before entering the shed.

The girl behind you said nothing as the faceless knight and his horse trotted away.

>> No.21659781

"Ariana, do you even want to go back home? Is that why you're so far north?"

>> No.21659793

So Ariana, why so scared of him?

>> No.21659863

"Ariana, do you even want to go back home? Is that why you're so far north?"
"N-no, I do." She said, jumping as you address her. She refused to elaborate.
"Why are you so scared of him?"
"I wasn't scared." She said, frowning at you, as she stopped hiding behind you. "A-and anyway, I can make my way home on my own."

>> No.21659869

ive been trying to adress this lolz
we dont even know wth she is doing with her self and were about to strap her to a horse and run off into the night with her

>> No.21659892

"So, how did you end up here?

And if you weren't scared why did you not want to talk to the knight?"

>> No.21659903

"well sense were traveling in the same direction i think itd be best if we travel together. im a skilled hunter so youre in good hands and a horse would be shorter than foot."

>> No.21659939


Crios is leaving with his horse bro.

>> No.21660010

"I'm travelling the same way, Ariana, do you want to come with me for a bit?"

>> No.21660064

oh balls i read it too fast

>> No.21660083

"So, how did you end up here?" You ask. "And if you weren't scared, why did you not want to talk to the knight?"
The girl crossed her arms and glared at you.
"I got lost." She said.
"Ariana, since we're traveling in the same direction, I think it'd be best if we travel together." You say.
"I might as well." She said. "Safety in numbers and... stuff."

>> No.21660112

"I agree. Though you must've gotten remarkably lost to end up all the way over here. We're a fair distance from your home.

Know anywhere good nearby to set up camp? I don't think staying in the town is that good an idea, some people seem not to like you."

>> No.21660131


Yes (ruffle her hair) stuff.

So, can we agree on some extra blankets and food ?

>> No.21660132

"Do you have any supplies, or items you need to pick up at a camp perhaps?"

>> No.21660158

How little is this girl? Is her butt grabbable?

>> No.21660179

"I agree." You say. "Though you must've gotten remarkably lost to end up all the way over here. We're a fair distance from your home."
"I got really really lost." She said, arms still crossed, as you ruffle her hair.
"Do you have any supplies, or items you need to pick up at a camp perhaps?"
"I'm fine." She said.
"Know anywhere good nearby to set up camp? I don't think staying in the town is that good an idea, since people seem not to like you."
"I, um, did take some bread yesterday." She said, pressing the tips of her fingers together. "But I didn't really have money. And anyway, there is this big clearing that we could camp. I ran into it while I was, um, wandering."

>8, maybe 9 years old. And no.

>> No.21660212

And i suppose you also summoned rats?


>> No.21660283

"Yeah, I noticed that bread thing. You aren't very good at stealing are you.

Come on, we're going to get some basic supplies so you don't freeze to death out here and then we'll set up camp. I've got rations and can hunt for more on the way."

>> No.21660303

can we have a list of items we're carrying?
i think we should at least grab a tent and stuff if not, maybe a nearby shop has one if we dont.
and ariana needs a hood, her hair would stand out if plan to gather goods

>> No.21660349

>her hair would stand out
Would it? I don't think it's that out of the ordinary.

>> No.21660381

shes not wanted in the town and red hair would be eaiser to remember her for

>> No.21660422

I see, fair point. The villagers didn't seem THAT bloodthirsty, though.

>> No.21660449

They had to tied up to a pyre, with kindling beneath it.

That doesn't speak in favor of any nonviolent tendencies they may possess.

>> No.21660460

"Yeah, I noticed that bread thing. You aren't very good at stealing, are you."
"That's a good thing." She said. "I'd want to be really bad at bad things than to be good at them."
"Come on, we're going to get some basic supplies so you don't freeze to death out here, and then we'll set up camp."
"Okay." She responded, as the two of you enter a small shop of odds and ends. The storekeeper gives the girl a look, and then turns to you, ready for business.
"What is it you would like?" He asked.

>Survival kit (Tinder box, skinning and carving knives, etc)
>6 days of rations
>Currency: 3 jewelry, 2 gold, 12 silver, 36 bronze- Quite a lot, for a villager- mostly the jewelry and the gold.
>Sword, Bow, 20 Arrows.
>Useless odds and ends.

>> No.21660475

"Well then, shall we see about getting some blankets for the night?"

>> No.21660480

true, i just like to play it safe sometimes.
we dont have a knight to back us up if anything happens again

>> No.21660501

"A blanket please, shopkeeper. Dried food if you have any available too."

>> No.21660516


A hatchet (wood choppin') and two blankets will do. How much do I owe ya?

>> No.21660522

>Things to get
A pair of good blankets
>Anyone think of anything else?

>> No.21660528

Blankets, travelling cloak for the girl, rope, knife/dagger for the girl, a pack of some kind for her to carry things, more rations in case we have slim pickings, hatchet.

>> No.21660535

rope, tent, blankets, waterskin, flint and steel, and maybe a small handaxe

>> No.21660606


For any future fights we may get in, I propose we dual-wield with the sword in our right hand and one handed axe in the left, however our main weapon is still the bow for now.

>> No.21660611

"Hmm..." You say. "Blankets, a travelling cloak for the girl, some rope, waterskins, a pack for the girl, and a hatchet."

"Well, all of that will take... two silver coins." He said. You give him a Look- The hatchet alone would cost a silver, yes, but the cloaks and rope would be hardly worth more than a few copper coins.

>> No.21660636

that sounds pretty badass and an unusual combo to train in

>> No.21660641

Keep on giving him the look, raise an eyebrow.

How many bronze coins are there in a silver?

>> No.21660702


Smirk at him and say "a silver and ten coppers"

We won't get scammed just because these people are superstitious fuck-heads.

>> No.21660704

at this instant traveling with the girl id say we dont get into a fight with the trader...not when we dont have the goods in our hands at least. let him place the stuff on the counter, tell him the quality of these goods arent worth two silver, maybe one silver and 25 bronze at the least

>> No.21660749


Follow up with:

C'mon good sir, my jink is just as shiny as anyone else's and think of it this way, I'm taking this girl out of your village for free, so why don't you work with me here?

>> No.21660762

>There are about fifty or so copper coins worth a silver, and about the same rate for silver coins worth a gold.

You raise an eyebrow at him, continuing to give him a Look.
"A silver and ten coppers." You say.
"... One silver, thirty copper." He relented. "But no lower."
"... Just pay him what he wants so we can move on." Ariana said, quietly.

>> No.21660812

"One Silver, twenty copper. It's the mid-point of both our offers, friend."

>> No.21660835

Silver and twenty. We aren't made of money, and that's a generous offer.

>> No.21660842


Alright, let's just get a move on. But give him a dirty look as we leave, and swipe our purchases out of his hands once we've payed.

I get the feeling we aren't completely safe camping close to the village. I suggest sleeping with one eye open, or not at all just to be safe. The first sign that the villagers might try something, we hoof it outta there.

>> No.21660923

"One silver, twenty copper." You say. "It's the mid-point of both our offers, friend."
He scoffed. "It's still lower than thirty copper. Very well."
You gave him your coins, and took the supplies, giving Ariana her cloak and one of the waterskins, stuffing the blankets into your pack.

You leave the store, walking out into the village itself. It wasn't quite as thick-forested as it was in the vale, but there were still enough trees to block the sides of the road, as the two of you continued walking, as the sun started to set. For the most part, Ariana didn't seem to talk, simply following you as you made your way toward the clearing she'd spoken about.

She grabbed the sleeve of your tunic, suddenly.
"It's off the road." She said, pointing to the west. "This way."

>> No.21660961

Oh boy, here we go.

"Alright, lead the way. What were you doing off the road, anyway?"

>> No.21660985


How far off the road?

(betrayal sense is tingling.....)
(can we try and talk to our sword through our mind? ask it if it senses anything weird about Ariana?)

>> No.21661020

"Alright, lead the way." You say. She trotted ahead of you, pulling her new cloak tightly around her as you wander into the forest. "What were you doing off the road, anyway?"
"I got lost." She said. "I wouldn't have gotten lost if I stayed on the road, duh."
"How far off the road?" You ask.
"Not that far." She said.

The two of you enter a rather small clearing- but one with enough space for both of you, and a fire. You see strange, deep scratches in the ground, too large for even a bear, and a fallen log, but she doesn't seem to notice.
"Um." She said, and you turn to her. "Er, how do I help you set up camp?"

>> No.21661060

Check and see how old the tracks are.

>> No.21661064


I'll gather some wood for a fire, you set up these blankets, okay?
(has the sword said anything since our old house?)

>> No.21661078

"Uh, hey. Were those marks here when you left?"

>> No.21661167

"Uh, hey, were those marks here when you left?" You ask, looking town to the tracks. They seem rather recent- only a few days or so, and they don't seem to lead anywhere in particular...
"What marks?" She asked, looking to the deep scratches in the dirt. "I, uh, didn't notice those." She said. You shrug, and get to your feet.

"I'll gather some wood for a fire, you set up these blankets, okay?" You ask, setting down your pack, grabbing the hatchet from it.
She nodded, and tugged the blankets out of your pack. "Okay."

You make your way into the forest, seeking some good firewood, hatchet in hand. After some time, you have a considerable armful, and then you hear a loud scream. Rushing back to the clearing, you see Ariana crouched on the wooden log, covering her ears, eyes screwed shut, as dozens... no, hundreds of roaches rush about the area beneath and around the overturned log, swarming wildly. She peeked open an eye, and then squeaked as she shut it again.

>> No.21661180

"Haha, it's ok" Shoo them away.

>> No.21661208


Okay fuck I guess she is a witch. Or at the very least cursed with Vermin Magnet or something bothersome like that.

whelp, get to stompin'.

>> No.21661221

Pick her up, start shooing and stomping until the roaches get away.

"Kiddo, I'm not mad. But I would like something resembling an answer."

>> No.21661224

After dealing with said roaches, ask her what happened whilst investigating the log that they were swarming.

>> No.21661248

"Haha, it's okay." You say, laughing softly as you start stomping, scaring the roaches away from the clearing, back into the forest. You set down your firewood, slipping the hatchet into your belt, and start examining the log- there was nothing out of the ordinary about it, and it looks like it fell over quite recently. "What happened?"
"Um, I was setting up the blankets, and then they came out of the log. I think it was rotted or something." She said, tears in her eyes. "I-I-I don't like bugs."

>> No.21661249

Now that we're a bit more alone, I want to ask the sword what it can do besides talk.

>> No.21661253

Ask if she frequently encounters vermin hordes. Pic maybe related with any heirloom she might carry.

>> No.21661299

Start up the fire.

>> No.21661301

Wipe tears away. Comfort little girl.

>> No.21661302

"It's okay, I don't like bugs either.

But there's something you aren't telling me. Don't worry, I won't be mad no matter what it is. You can trust me."

>> No.21661341


It's alright sweetheart. How often do things like this happen?
(try to be as gentle as possible when asking her)

>> No.21661360

"It's okay, I don't like bugs either." You say, starting up the fire. "But there's something you aren't telling me." You say. "Don't worry, I won't be mad no matter what it is. You can trust me. How often do things like this happen?"
"I can't trust you." She said, frowning. "My sister told me never to trust anyone."

>> No.21661380

"Well, I can't see your sister having made too many friends with that attitude."

>> No.21661394


And why is that? Please believe me Ariana, whatever you tell me, we'll still be friends. We are friends aren't we?
(offer up some of our food as we say this, sweeten the deal, she must be hungry)

>> No.21661411

"Ariana, if you never trust anyone you're not going to live a happy life.

If I had any intent to turn you in, hurt you, do anything other than be good to you I would have done so already.

If you tell me I'll tell you something about myself that I don't want anyone else to know. It's a promise."

>> No.21661446


(what would our secret be? We can't count past 10? We love pretty daisies? We love our sister.... a little too much?)

>> No.21661459

We have a sword that talks to us and we're either crazy or have a magic sword. It gives her just about equal leverage on us, assures Mutually Assured Smiting by the Order if we decide to betray each other.

>> No.21661492

"Well, I can't see your sister having made too many friends with that attitude." You say, offering her some of your rations.
"She has lots of friends!" She said, and frowned, taking the bit of dried meat you'd given her, as she took a seat on her blanket, hugging her knees, making sure to check it for bugs.
"Please believe me, Ariana, whatever you tell me, we'll still be friends. We are friends, aren't we?"
She cleared her throat, and stared down into the fire.
As you sit, you see, Ser Crios, his horse following him, as they come into the clearing- no doubt called by her scream, earlier.
"... I'm a witch." She said, finally. The horse whinnied, and Ariana suddenly turned back, and squeaked again.
"... Well." Ser Crios said. "I'd heard some screaming, and thought someone was in trouble..." He said.

>> No.21661496


Yeah..... that is a pretty good secret I guess.

>> No.21661497

Oh, you have a sister? my sister ran off, so im looking for her, I hope you told your sister you were heading out.

>> No.21661522

Now Ariana, it's not good to tell lies, even just to get attention.

>> No.21661527

id say tell her about the ssword, if anything and she rats us out who the hell would beleive her?

>> No.21661534


........please tell me ser crios didn't hear that.

Hail, Ser Crios! Nothing out of the ordinary, little Ariana here just shied at a cockroach, *right* Ariana?

>> No.21661535

"Just some bugs Crios.

Now I do have to wonder what you're doing here, I thought you set out a while ago."

>> No.21661608

"Just some bugs, Crios." You say. "Nothing out of the ordinary. Little Ariana here just shrieked at a cockroach."
"I see." He said. "I'm glad it wasn't anything worse."
"Now, I do have to wonder what you're doing here. I thought you set out a while ago."
"I did. But I'd had second thoughts, and turned back, when I heard it." He said. "But I'm glad nobody's in trouble. I had a bad feeling about leaving a young girl and an unskilled villager on their own against the world, so I decided to escort you. Unless that's a problem, is it?"

>> No.21661621

oh fuck....uhm *scratches head* just some bugs is all i though youd be father by now

>> No.21661666


Take Crios aside and level with him

"Listen Crios, the girl is afraid of you, gods know why, but I think it'd be best if you kept on. And besides, I'd really appreciate if you could deliver that message to my sister."

>> No.21661706

" No problem at all. Just a bit paranoid after Gabriel."

>> No.21661743

I'm hardly unskilled, maybe bad with a sword but I've traveled the woods and put food on the table with my bow for years, we should be fine.

I do appreciate the offer though and would be honored to have you travel with us, perhaps you could teach me some sword work as we went?

>> No.21661846


You guys realize Ariana just admitted to being a witch right? And then you offer to travel with a knight of the order? The order notorious for burning innocent little girls at the stake? Let's use some logic here guys. Ariana is a lot safer and happier away from Crios.

>> No.21661880

a knight who explicitly stated he "sensed no evil" meaning he likely actually can determine whether or not a magic user is good or bad.

on top of that I full planned on being ready to kill him at a moments notice.

and let's not forget exactly where our information is coming from, that shifty old man from our own village that threatened to kill us.

>> No.21661882

hmm yeah, althugh he doesnt seem like tht at first im betting hs entire demeanor will change kniwing the fact shes a witch.
"ser we are skilled hunters and besides whats gong to happen out in these woods? i apreciate the concern but im betting you have better things to do"

>> No.21661937

"I'm hardly unskilled." You say. "Maybe bad with a sword, but I've traveled the woods and put food on the table with my bow for years. We should be fine."
"Glad to hear it." He said.
"I do appreciate the offer, though, and would be honored to have you travel with us. Perhaps you could teach me some sword work as we went?"
"Oh, certainly." He said. "I've never been the best teacher, but I can teach you enough to deal with a bandit or two. But that will have to wait until morning. It is rather late, after all." He mumbled to his horse a bit, and it laid down, happy to rest, as he took it's saddle and saddlebags off of the horse.
"Just a moment." He said, pulling his helmet off. Behind laid a flaxen-haired man, a few years older than you, with twinkling blue eyes. "This armor does get uncomfortable at times, especially when travelling. So, I suppose you two were just starting to have dinner?"
Ariana silently nodded, and in return, he took a small bag out of one of the saddlebags, pulling it open. "Here." He said, pulling out a small, stale loaf of bread, snapping it in half, giving one half to the girl, and the other to you. "Just some dried meat won't be enough to sustain you for long."

He went back to his horse, and started shrugging out of his armor. Ariana gave you a Look for a full ten seconds, and then frowned and started nibbling on the bread.

>> No.21661946


Yeah, he may "sense no evil" but if he sticks around and then witnesses some of the freaky shit that we just saw with the roaches he's gonna develop some suspicions pretty quick. It's still safer to be away from him, child-burner or no. If he does discover she's a witch, at the very least he'll probably freak out and restrain her, which isn't necessary at all.

>> No.21661991

I know you're a little scared of him Ariana,but he's going to be a lot better than I am at fighting if we run into trouble.

plus if I learn a little as we go we'll be safer after we part ways later on.

>> No.21662015


Well shit. I guess we can only prepare for the worst at this point. If he discovers Ariana is a witch and makes a move to attack her or anything else violent, he's getting a quick dagger in the throat.

Go over to Ariana while his back is turned and whisper that everything will be okay, I promise.

>> No.21662122

"I know you're a little scared of him, Ariana, but he's going to be a lot better than I am at fighting if we run into trouble." You murmur, quietly. "Everything will be okay, I promise."
"... Okay." She said, nodding. "But if anything happens..."
She affixed you with a strange, cold look, before her eyes darted to the claws in the ground, and back to you.
"My sister will know."
Quietly, she turned away, finishing off the bread, before curling up in her blanket.
Taking a deep breath, the fully unarmored knight sat back, drinking from some kind of phial, before sliding the empty glass bottle back into the horse's saddlebags.
"Goodnight." He said, simply, and lay back.

>> No.21662133

>claws in the ground
>Clawmarks, even. Whoops.

>> No.21662152


Well looks like Ariana's sister is always close by, and is a witch from left 4 dead from the looks of the marks in the ground.

Anyways, let's try to chat up the sword once we're sure everyone else is asleep.

>> No.21662292

Ask the sword denizens if they have individual names, any special powers, hew exactly the came to be.

>> No.21662319

You poke at the fire as the crickets start up, the stars peering down at you, as you sit there, waiting for Ariana and Crios to fall asleep. You give the sword a glance, and you quickly look to both Ariana and Crios- the former, sniffling on her own, and the latter, snoring loudly.

You look back to the sword, and lay back for a moment, waiting to make sure the others were asleep before you started talking. You blink, and then when you open your eyes, it was suddenly morning.

>End of thread!
>Yeah, today was entirely shitty. I was trying some new things, and they obviously didn't work. Any constructive feedback, especially critisicm, should really help me.
>While I'll always start at the same time of day, I won't be starting every day. Half a year of doing that pretty much killed me, and I almost stopped questing entirely. I'll be doing it every other day, at least.
>Also, I'll be here to answer questions about the setting a bit, if you have them.

>> No.21662337


>> No.21662361


So, this order, are they affiliated with any god or gods? what sovereign nation rules over our village and this Sardin?

>> No.21662364

i thought it was just fine besides the trolls in the start fuking shit up lolz
the apear wouldave been a badass choice but im not one to complain. its starting to take off great

>> No.21662402

thanks I liked it

>> No.21662416

>The order's a relatively old thing that's existed for as long as anyone can remember. They're not affiliated with any gods or spirits, and in fact, declare gods and spirits at worst as 'evil witch magic', and at best as 'the words of madmen'.
>Each large city- in this area at least- is a city-state, which rules the city itself and it's surrounding villages. Sardin's ruler, Lady Coruscant, is *technically* the ruler of the surrounding villages, though it doesn't seem to affect you, other than taxes.

>> No.21663415

>Exabutts face when this is far, far future New Arcturus

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