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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.19351362 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

ITT: Shit GMs do that piss you off.
>Caring more about the story than the actual fun of the players
>Creating an encounter with a boss creature just to watch it fight another NPC
>literally killing player's characters because they engage the boss

>> No.19351372

>Bringing personal matters into games

>> No.19351438

Do you mean getting killed by the boss that was only created to fight a NPC or just bosses in general that kill your party? If it's the later I don't see much of a problem.

>> No.19351447

>never being lax with bad rolls

>> No.19351463

the first one

>> No.19351490

> Only roleplaying with two of the five players.

>> No.19351496

Refusing to modify stats on enemies, gear, encounters, etc to keep the players engaged and fair.

When I GM, I change shit on-the-fly. If my players want to attack the character I was planning to be the session's end-boss before they even know he's evil, for some completely innocuous reason like he gave one of them lip, I'll get rid of his absurd overgod abilities and respec him for a fist-fight. Likewise, if they're kicking the ass out of everything in their path, I'll take twenty seconds and juice up the obstacle in their path. I WANT the players to win: I just want them to do it by the skin of their knees, panting and heaving with the effort, and congratulating eachother on their hard-won victory.

I've played with GM's who feel like it's their solemn duty to actively destroy the players without prejudice. I don't understand that.

>> No.19351525

>bringing fetishes into games
>setting up paladin-fall scenarios, then making the paladin fall anyway even if they come up with a third option

>> No.19351544

>Not taking player's skills/abilities into account for an adventure
I don't even know why I took a level in rogue! None of these fucking doors have locks I can open anyway!

>> No.19351547

>Having a 'main party'
>Having a set of waypoints we must visit
>Having a huge awesome setting we're not allowed to explore

>> No.19351556

>Letting That Guy have free reign

>> No.19351562

This shit, right here.

>> No.19351577

Not being clear about tone before the game.
If you wanna run a game full of politicking and intrigue, and we all bring hacknslash barbarians or whatever, then it's because A) we're trolling you, which is bad or B) you were unclear, which is also bad.

>> No.19351584

>letting people who unironically use and capitalize the term That Guy to the table

>> No.19351597

As a GM, I do this.

...Help me.

>> No.19351598

I don't like that approach at all, as a player.
If I'm going through enemies like an out-of-control blender through wet tissue, I want to have the easy victory, because goddammit, I put a lot of thought into making my character a killing machine and setting up the circumstances that got my enemies off guard.
If I accidentally get into a fistfight with the BBEG, I want to have shit go totally off the rails for everyone because suddenly he has to show his hand so everyone knows he's the bad guy and I'm suddenly in way over my head and have to figure out how to get back on shore.
I don't want the gameworld to change to accomodate me unless I work to arrange it that way. Otherwise it just feels like there's no point - I could go in any direction, but they're all the same.
Obviously, this is a matter of preference, and it's not like it's all or nothing anyway.

>> No.19351599

I had this problem. playing V:tM, so we are always hungry for some combat. A boss comes and attacks but wants to kill the NPC and not us so we get swatted out of the way. The me and the other players don't stand for this so we use the power of IMAGINATION to leap over the barrier between us and the boss. It then proceeds to rape our shit and we barely make it out. it was like he was punishing us for trying to have fun.....

>> No.19351616

>Local magistrate imprisoned a man we wanted to get information from in order to prove said magistrate was practicing necromancy on people he had abducted and delivered to him by thugs.
>Come up with a plan to get our party's fighter into prison by getting him to trash a bar in a "drunken" frenzy, then punch out a guard.
>He will then get our informant, get the information we need out of him (because these guys go way back) and prepare for the next phase.
>Have the party sorceress use her wiles to get in good with the warden of the prison, who we know already from intelligence our rogue gathered has a thing for young women.
>She gets him to pardon our fighter and get him out of there, we leave our informant on the inside where he's safer until we can expose the magistrate's plan, including the wrongful imprisonment of our informant who we will then get released for not really having done anything.

The GM told us 'no, you cannot do that'. No explanation besides 'because I said I don't want you to' was given.

>> No.19351618


>not giving a shit about story and just setting up a series of dungeon crawls
>Really amateurish attempts to be "DARK!" and "EDGY!"
>Allowing players to use the Magic Items section of the book like a mail-order catalogue

>> No.19351642

>Severely powerful individual
>Attacking it directly
>Not absconding with the NPCs and having an awesome car chase

what is wrong with you

>> No.19351659

Instead of writing a story, write a series of individuals, places, and things. Said things might cause a story to develop, but there is not one in place.

That's how you DM properly.

>> No.19351661


Well in a case like you, it's not like I'd beef up a bandit to make him super strong. I'd let you steamroll the shit out of him.

But at some point I'd get you alone and send a bunch of high-powered ninjas at you. Or else I'd send you into a situation you're not as well-equipped for, like a touchy political meeting with the town elders, where fighting your way out is the easiest option, but has some downsides, and forces you to make ~Tough Decisions~.

But yeah, respeccing the BBEG is really sort of a play-it-by-ear. I generally go with "If they don't know he's the Big Bad and if revealing it now would require massive hurdle-jumping and fuck up the flow, then I'll change him to fit the circumstances. If they have a hunch and don't care about the repercussions of acting on it, then fuck 'em."

>> No.19351662

>knowing the stats of the monster he MADE UP

>> No.19351696

I G like a DJ. I got my places, persons, and things, and I have a rough idea that the story will go from Point A to Point B, and Bad Things will happen in between.

Then I hit the ground running and shit happens as shit happens.

I almost never have a session go as planned, and it's almost always more interesting than what I *had* planned.

>> No.19351702

When this shit happens, I have my character leave. I'm fine with you haveing your little DMPCs fight and all, just don't expect me to stand around and watch.

>> No.19351738

>The GM told us 'no, you cannot do that'.
Your GM is a faggot.
Seriously, the GM might give you warnings sometimes ("Your character is Lawful Good, are you sure he would execute the prisoners?" or "Are you sure you want to shoot this merchant in the face? It'll make sure every town guard in the city will hunt you down.") but if you want to try something creative your GM should never EVER say 'no' outright.

>> No.19351754

I get bored by GMs who play things by the book and are afraid to color outside the lines.

The last session I GM'd (Mouse Guard), I had the players build a dam around a town with a flood incoming, and with their successes determining the dam's strength, "skills," etc. At the end of the session, the flood came, and the dam BATTLED it. It was fucking thrilling.

And after something like that, "You run into three bandits, a short fat one, a tall skinny one, and their leader" is boring enough to induce tears.

>> No.19351826

IIRC it was later discovered that he didn't like the idea that we'd do things like
>intentionally get into prison
>use sexual favors to get pardons
>publicly expose the magistrate for his actions, then kill his face if he got violent

We were a largely CN party, and everyone agreed the plan was solid. Hell, we had to fight to get that informant in the first place, he got thrown in jail largely so the GM could cut off information. He didn't expect us to get friendly with the group the magistrate hired, he probably just wanted us to hunt them down and fight our way through the mission.

>> No.19351880

>Bring newbie girlfriend to play in ongoing game.
>Do nothing but chew her out all session for not knowing what to do, even though she's a brand new player and has no earthly way of knowing.
>When he finally starts telling her what she needs to do, he does it as though she were a small child.
It made everybody at the table extremely uncomfortable. I felt really bad for her, as she seemed genuinely interested in the hobby to begin with, but she never came to our games again.

>> No.19351893

It's like he was intentionally patronizing her to make her not want to play.

>> No.19351899

It still means he's a railroading asswipe. Seriously, players doing shit you NEVER expected is one if the best things about being a DM. Punishing them for being original and clever just seems petty to me.

>> No.19351930

We felt the same. Basically just all came up with excuses why we couldn't play for a while (if you were direct with the guy he'd get petty and try and sabotage your social lives because it made him feel better, wasn't worth the effort). Never went back.

>> No.19351960

What pisses me off is that one of my friends who frequently runs our games pretty much always demands I play some kind of busty bitch so he can have all his lezzy NPCs rub all over her.
My other female friends rarely make girl characters, so since I'm the only one he tries to live out his lesbian fantasies with my characters.

>> No.19351984

What happens if you refuse?

>> No.19352173


Your GM is part of the problem as to why there isn't enough ca/tg/irls. Kill him and redeem your groups honor.

>> No.19352280

>Forces checks on us when he gets bored. One PC had to make 4 WP rolls in one round of combat because we took a while to work through the NPCs.
>Doesn't even fake his rolls just says 'he dodged' and when questioned rolls a die without even looking and repeats himself.
>Throws us into fights with little or no context
>Actually forced on PC to shoot another when he passed his BS test with 3 degrees of success causing fate burnage

He's still looking for a place for the second mission of his epic deathwatch campaign.

>> No.19352366

Ca/tg/irls just make a huge mess with groups, at least in my experience.

It have been an awkward and weird past 6 months.

Not sure if the sex is awesome or he is just abusing her easy to manipulate personality.

>> No.19352545

Shit GMs do that I hate, eh?

>making the game more about his cool NPCs than the players
>having his cool NPCs do everything important and decide where everyone goes
>roleplaying dialogue with himself between his cool NPC and the badguys
Shit dude, why don't you just write a fucking novel if it's all about your characters? GMing a game should be a selfless endeavor that focuses on letting the players feel cool. Asshole.

I run a game of Pathfinder on IRC and my players think my dice script has it out for them. I've attempted to compensate for this by giving a free temporary hero point (goes away when the fight is over, doesn't count against max of 3) whenever someone rolls a natural 1. I had a player get four temporary hero points in a single fight. That was interesting to see.

He certainly turned the fight around afterwards, though!

>my players' faces when I tell them their natural 1 got them a free hero point

>> No.19352611

Nice idea, but how do I do that for Dark Heresy beside fate points?

Cookie points? Fuck up so bad that is was funny points?

>> No.19352647

Could go with "good bad luck" which is like a fortuitous fuckup. Something bad happens, but something good also happens, like dodging the enemy's spray of gunfire by falling down the stairs, or kicking a grenade away but kicking your shoe off as well.

>> No.19352715

So pretty much regular failure scenes.

My still are scare as crap to engage in combat, some how the psyker always gets shot where he has no armor and ends in the first in of combat.

(Yes the Sniper Assassin and the mid range Guardsmen really dislike his character after he rolls a 9 every time he uses a power)

>> No.19352741


The majority of the group I dm for is girls.
We're all early twenties though, so they've all got their shit together now. DMing teenage girls might be weird.

>> No.19352743

>Caring more about the story than the actual fun of the players

Understand that GMs often have certain ideas and plans for their games and scrapping those plans because the players just want to murder and steal from everything is less fun for them, especially if the players go out of their way to shit on the GM.

Tabletop Gaming is about collaborative fun, and that means there has to be some give and take. You humor the GM's amateurish storyline and he gives you a little more wiggle room instead of fighting with you.

>> No.19352799

>GMing a game should be a selfless endeavor that focuses on letting the players feel cool. Asshole.

While I definitely agree that all of the complaints you listed were legitimate and any GM who does that is a terrible GM, the above part of your statement is stupid.

The GM should have fun too, and player's who think it's all and only about them are often just as bad as many of the GMs described in this thread.

>> No.19352856

Yeah, you're right, it was a bad generalization I made.

>> No.19352872

Had two girls in my group all through high school. One was whiny and the other was boring but it's just because they're whiny and boring, not because they were girls.

>implying sexism is a valid reason for anything

>> No.19352957

>player chick makes void shugenja magistrate, she'll be the head of the party
>best friend makes loyal, young Lion samurai
>my character is an underpowered ronin, and I told the others outright that my character is involved in a secret plan to form something like this:
More respect for the ronins of Rokugan, goddamnit

>shugenja chick's first action when we meet is some kind of scanning-magic
>she doesn't know that my defences against such things are up way high
>she keeps doing this shit, meta as fuck, still cannot read me
>I keep humming CAN'T TOUCH THIS

I fucked her good that night though. I miss them breasts sometimes.

>> No.19352966

But that's a good thing. It makes things interesting, keeps players on their toes, and makes excellent stories.

>> No.19352971

It is a valid reason to bug someone and make fun of them.

Like asking why isn't your Guardswoman in the field kitchen. Or saying that the female inquisitor is part of the Ordo Crustulum, because that heretic dishes wont clean them self

>> No.19352979

Oh yes, the GM didn't do shit to stop her from metagaming. That made me quit after one session. He was obviously all about the chick, meh. Funny though, the chick would have been all for my friend, the Lion. Still, I was the one regular in her bed.


>> No.19353010

>Do half a turn in one 5-hour session
>"We made some good progress this week!"

>> No.19353013

Masturbating while thinking of her in bed is not alpha my dear friend

>> No.19353082

Man, I'd give a nut for a Mouse guard party. Care to tell me more about your MG games? Please?

>> No.19353215

Got girlfriend now, would not cheat. :| I'm boring, I guess.

>> No.19353234

Just make sure they're cool with it. I encourage people to make racist jokes about me because white people have it coming. I have a few friends who get genuinely offended by racist/sexist jokes so I leave them out of it. But then again, no one gets hurt by fantasy racism (ie, elves are fags, orcs rape shit) so my games are rampant with that shit.

>> No.19353284

>I told the others outright that my character is involved in a secret plan
Why would you tell them this? Personally, I find that a lot of the fun of having a secret plan is keeping the plan... well... a secret. Right up until the moment where you reveal everything, that is.

>> No.19353300

seconded. Tell us more, Sensei!

>> No.19353642

>viewing the game as the gm v. the players
>throwing in bad guys of the week without building them up or relating them to the plot at all
>constantly throwing impossible obstacles at the players
>when characters do achieve something, take it away doubly so

>> No.19353776

As a GM I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ask what kind of "rules" they want to play by before we start. They want over the top fight-y action-y game or they want a game where if they insult some petty noble they rot in a cell.

Also, some players just NEED to be railroaded or they just get lost and some just want to go around exploring shit.

Some players want to be the center of the action, the entire world with all of its events revolving around them or atleast being related to their quest, some players enjoy a living, breathing, organic world where shit happens and sometimes get resolved without them.

Some playes get pissed if actions have heavy consequences, some pissed if they dont.

This one game, the rogue stole a a focusing crystal from a wizards laboratory and when he was unable to utilize it he shattered it. He was all bitchy and pissed off when he got arrested and executed because he thought that stealing a priceless artifact AND bragging with it in an inn would go unreported and unpunished because "we are the heroes"

You gotta tailor your DMing to your players.

>> No.19353786

This thread made me feel so much better about myself. Made me realize my main flaw is being inexperienced and wanting to build a good plot for the players to enjoy.

I'm still never going to allow monks though. Fuck monks.

>> No.19353867


What did monks do? I've seen stories of players who make bad-ass monks, or be woefully underpowered. Nothing bad or overpowered though.

>Derailment imminent

>> No.19353906


>> No.19353921

every fucking game. everyone else sits and plays on their fucking phone. why bother even playing? fuckers

>> No.19353927

If I allow anything asian in my games the game slowly descends into weaboo faggotry

>> No.19353943


>> No.19353962


If I`d be the DM I would say stop that shit right now and pay attention to the game or its over right now.

I dont mind answering phones, taking pee breaks or sometimes a smoke break but if you dont like it, then just dont come.

>> No.19354417

Gather round, one and all, while I relate the worst single DM act I've ever come across. We were playing a pretty sweet Shadowrun campaign. From a roleplaying perspective, the first dozen sessions were among the most fun I've ever had. We had a spectacular cast of characters, genuine relationships developing between them, and good times every week.

The focal point of our group was the troll's little (human) sister. Not related IRL, but in the game it worked out great. She was kind of our mascot... my character saved her life in the very first session, and then another PC saved both of us, and so on. So we all had these backstories that crossed or whatever, but we'd actually developed in-game, and Little Sister was our party glue.

Now, we were all in a gang, or were on a trial basis. A lot of gangs in the area were being mysteriously killed/vanished in their clubhouses. So we were investigating this, and we had a pretty good idea it was our gang leader's girlfriend. My character had just started (secretly) dating the leader's sister, and she called up one night asking if I'd seen him. Nope, not in a week. Turns out no one had. Well shit, right?

>> No.19354425

So we all head out looking for him, all except Little Sister, who hasn't made it home from school yet (she occasionally went). The rest of the gang is summoned to the clubhouse, because hey, gang emergency. As we're out, we get into a gunfight with a bunch of guys who are way tougher than we are. (Turns out they're the PCs from a few campaigns ago... in fact, all of the powerful NPCs and gods in this DM's games are former PCs. They frequently turn up as overly powerful DMPCs for a few sessions.) We get our asses handed to us, can't escape because of some DM "oh obviously they thought of that" bullshit, and get stuck halfway across town.

Little Sister comes back from school to see everyone gathered at the gang house, standing hypnotized in a circle, with leader's girlfriend and some cultists (DM's former PC and her cadre) standing around. She calls my character, who tells her to stay hidden, but the DM rules that I got stunned by a spell before that happened (phone is implanted, but apparently they can detect that). Leader's girlfriend sees Little Sister and beckons her into the circle, using a spell that she couldn't possibly resist.

Where am I going with this? It's the worst railroading I've ever experienced, so obviously the DM is going to set up something awesome, right? We're going to have a chance to break free, race back to the gang house, and save Little Sister, right?

>> No.19354436

Ha ha ha nope. We get back and she's gone. Everyone else is dead. Well, at least we can do the next-best-thing: move heaven and earth to find her, going on a heroic quest, taking names and kicking ass. We are all pretty pumped up for this, swearing valiant oaths, assembling munitions, and calling in favours from the people we've helped in previous sessions.

Nope. The DM informs us that we'll never be able to find her. No rolls, no roleplay, nothing. She's gone, kidnapped by this ultra-powerful and ultra-secret cult. Oh, and she's been magically tortured and raped for twenty weeks solid until she's been zombified into an obedient killing machine. She turns up on our doorstep twenty-one weeks later with her mother's severed head in her hands.

Little Sister's player left at that point. I would have too. We had one more session, which lasted a halfhearted hour, and then the game dissolved. DM spent the next month complaining about what a crybaby Little Sister's player was, not wanting to play an evil brain-dead sex slave assassin, as opposed to her bright, cheerful, thoughfully created and developed character.

The worst part is that, with all the railroading, DM must have put a lot of thought into this scenario. "You know what would be great? If I had X's character raped a thousand times, and then effectively killed her off and replaced her with a character of my own creation, bent to my whim. Everyone would enjoy that!"

>> No.19354501

Jesus christ.

>> No.19354526

>introduce NPC
>she follows us relentlessly
>only 2 of the people in our group speak her language and that's only because me and the other dude just happened to pick the same random ass bonus language
>can dodge any attack with ease
>can run across a tightrope at sprinting speed with perfect balance
>can heal anyone from the brink of death by touching them
>can ALSO do some OP as fuck high level arcane spells
>yet for some fucking reason REFUSES to fight, just hides in corners while battles are going on and dodges and runs from attackers
>evil cults are constantly trying to kidnap her

The best part was after we managed to kill a hydra (which he would not allow us to try and salvage for hides or poisons to sell) some NEW fucking cult showed up to steal her.

>his face when we all looked at eachother, said fuck this gay shit and gave her to the cult, turned 360 degrees and moonwalked away and spent the next few hours fucking around doing nothing until he finally gave up and dropped the campaign entirely

>> No.19354573


Holy shit. I was thinking this was a horrible, dickish thing to do to a beloved team mascot BEFORE I remembered that Little Sister was a player character. A player character! That's just fucking VILE.

>> No.19354634

I have this problem with my GM. She's a pretty bro ca/tg/irl, who's generally got her shit together, but she's super inflexible. Our group is mostly people new to PnP, so as you'd expect there's a bit of sillyness as we find our way, but she's not flexible enough to deal with it. We don't try to derail the game, but whenever we go a little off wall it's "no, you can't do that", instead of "okay, I can work with this."

It's a pity, 'cause she's generally pretty great otherwise.

>> No.19354728


I`m a pretty shit DM. I dont use systems, just homebrew and make up rolls on the spot because its easier. I play only homebrew systems so I can bullshit around stuff I dont like and insert stuff I like.

Every player I`ve ever met adores me. I never say "no" the choice is ALWAYS theirs to make. I warn them before exceptionally stupid things bu they are free to do shit. They are free to abandon their party, free to abandon their quests. If they want some "extreme" PC we will find a way to play something like that isntead of just saying no.

The most interesting part is, the players tend to derail campaigns and try to "force" stupid shit less because they are much more invested in their characters. They feel every decision, ever move they make is theirs and they dont want to lose "progress" They arent trying to "break the system" because there is nothing to break, if they want to run around naked stabbing city guards, I wont say no. In the end they became much more cohesive as a party and much more focused on "main" story hooks, than just random raising hell.

>> No.19354880

>Ask DM for a description of setting
>Doesn't give one
>Ask DM for feedback on character doesn't give any
>Character completely doesn't fit in the setting/style of the game

My Half-Elf Ranger and the Dwarven Cleric really fit into this game about political intrigue set in this all human city of notatallfantasyrenaissancevenice, thanks!

>> No.19355535

i dont mind breaks either. i understand you need soda or have to piss. but these people show up only to do combat, as if thats the only part of the game. then they demand we "catch them up" every 10 seconds.

our dm needs to be more assertive. i dont feel its my place to bitch

>> No.19358645

That's... HORRIBLE. Utterly horrible!

Did ANYONE try and explain to him what he did wrong?

>> No.19358696

The plot in itself doesn't sound to horrible the thing is that she/he should have talked with the players first.. And btw is Little Sister a reference to City of Lost Children?

>> No.19358895

What would you explain in a situation like that? "No, DM, rape is wrong." Would you bring up all the awesome things that could have happened? (I did this, obliquely... "Yeah, I thought for a while it was going to lead to X.") Anyway, DM is pretty sensitive to criticism, and was/is going through some hard times, so we all just kind of let it slide when he does stuff like this. LS's player was back for the next campaign a month later, everything forgiven.

No, that's what the troll called her when he was trying to be stern and big brotherly... though we did later play a game based loosely on that concept, kids and dream stealing (PCs were the kids). Funny, I never thought of that. Jeunet makes the best films.

Like I said, the overall plot was pretty great. But then... rape + character hijack.

The thread is getting long in the tooth, but I have more stories if anyone is interested.

>> No.19358954

When is /tg/ never interested in a story?

>> No.19358965


I'd be interested, I didn't know you came back.

>> No.19359069

I will tell you shit that pisses me off as a GM and a player.
1. Shit not getting off the ground.
2. GM's sticking to the rules the point of religion. As a GM I can't even remember how many rules I have broke or addendum I have made because of players.
3. Players calling railroading for the following situations:
3a. DMPCs with a backstory
3b. Having a story (not focusing on story, but bitching about having a story
3c... Making an entire fucking world, from scratch, and nearby worlds from scratch with background populaces and threats, only to stay in the starting town, and killing random civilians and city guards until bored and wanting to try a new game...
4. GMs and or players forcing their fetishes onto the table.
5. Playing FATAL or Running FATAL quest without Arch Magos Winter
6. GMS making up rules on the fly just to fuck with people.

>> No.19359106

Oh God, I actually finished two campaigns where I have plenty of complaints. Let me tell you about some shit that pisses me off
First GM
>not fleshing out modern fantasy setting or why magical races are around
>catholic church replaced with church of bahamut but vatican is in italy and dragonborn are asians and elves are italians so i have no idea how that actually works out culturally
>railroading when my character had no motivation to go anywhere with main party
>retarded homebrew shit stolen right out of Chrono Trigger as an excuse for him to have us fight higher level monsters out of our usual range, and each "double technique" were mad imba
>campaign is obligatory sideshow trip across characters' backstory hometowns where all plot-related locations are conveniently located
>campaign becomes more like a fan fiction starring our characters
>constant dmpcs showing up
>epilogue written about our characters that is horribly out of character
>and we had to read it aloud as a group
>magic item mail order catalog despite the fact magic did not exist at all prior to the campaign
So it was pretty much a combination of Resident Evil and Infamous. That sounds cool, except it wasn't. It was the opposite. Also it somehow got worse when one of my character's backstory guys showed up and was pretty much the Illusive Man from Mass Effect. HOW CONVENIENT.

>> No.19359117

Second GM
>dmpc kills us during first session
>turns out WE ARE THE CHOSEN ONES because we got our ass kicked
>dmpc shows up a mere six sessions later for final boss and we kick her ass
>also gives a speech about HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME after we never learned anything about her and she was simply there to "drive the plot"
>sessions where we just travel from one place to another and fighting SHADOW PEOPLE along the way
>i'm not kidding, we went one direction only to find out we had to go in a completely opposite direction to get to the direction we first went with
>when the most fun session comes around from the party dicking around in the eladrin city and not from the dm doing anything exciting or ineresting (my dorf sorc and mentally-impaired psion (we were also ambassadors to an elven kingdom) become a minstrel duo to sneak into the eladrin castle. it was pretty fun)
>claims that he thought it was a pretty good story
Me and another player constantly make jokes about the campaign now. We are not sure if the GM is aware of them or just takes them in stride.

>> No.19359159

True enough, I guess.

> Yes, Captcha, campaign for all of us

Okay, so here's my first D&D game in DM's world. Now, I'd played in another game with him before, so I should have seen what was coming. His character in that game was min/maxed to a pretty incredible level. With various splat books in effect, plus a psi dual class, plus abuse of Wishes to get unlimited magic arrows of all sorts, he had something like 12 attacks per round, doing 30+ damage per attack... at level 10. (My character, on the other hand, got 1 attack for 1d6 damage.)

Enter DM's world. It's been running for almost 30 years at this point, with a huge map up on the wall. Most of the former PCs are now gods in this world, and the other players ran a lot of them. And their gods would actively interfere with things. Apparently in the original D&D rule book, it says there's a 5% chance of a god interfering if you speak its name... so that's how we played. When we got in trouble, the other players could just shout out the names of their god characters, and eventually one would come running to help.

In the first game, our first trip from town to town went like this.
> Other players: We look on the job board.
> Me: So, there's just a job board for adventurers?
> DM: It's a town full of adventurers. Everyone here is an adventurer looking for work.
> Me: Okay....
> Other players: we'll take the delivery job.

>> No.19359174

Second game. Four trolls the moment we step out of town. Fortunately, we survived that, but needed to camp. And the random encounter rolls kept coming while we did. Two of the six of us made it alive/conscious to the next place, four IRL hours later. We got everyone healed up/brought to life, and as a cleric/ranger, I made a big donation to the temple that did this. Everyone looked at me like I was nuts, and DM asked why I was wasting my money.

Now, I'd like to point out that at all times here, I was trying my best to roleplay. I had a sweet character concept, a feral cleric who lived in the wilderness and tended a sort of snake-handling ministry for the few devout who dared to make the effort to come. But DM would have none of it... all relevant NPCs died as soon as they were introduced, and basically the whole game was in cities/dungeons. No one else even tried... it was just a numbers game. Like Diablo, clicking and loot, clicking and loot. I should have expected this from DM's last PC... but his Shadowrun game was so good that I thought there'd be higher things.

>> No.19359199

Shit, I missed the end of the first game.

First step out of town, first encounter. Our first mission was to deliver something to another town. DM used his random encounter tables liberally. Three black dragons. They're not interested in talking. They eat our horses and most of us. One guy gets away... but effectively we're starting over. Cue an hour to make new characters. Someone says, "Aw, we should have called upon some gods." "Oh yeah."

> Second game contd.

Anyway, we ended up foiling an evil cleric's summoning attempt, and through the portal, instead of a hideous extradimensional horror, stepped a woman in riding gear with a halo. My character immediately thought she was a goddess. He asked humbly if she wanted to ditch the dungeon and go hunting, and since that was obviously what he wanted more than anything, she said yes. Also, I was moving away IRL, and this was my last game with these guys for a long time, so I thought this would be a fitting way for my character to leave the party, riding off into the sunset to do clericy things in the woods.

This was kind of similar to Little Sister, now that I think about it. No rolls, no further roleplay. I was immediately a succubus' slave, forced to do all sorts of evil and heinous things which were completely out of character. Everyone else knew out of character that this was going to happen, but I refused to believe that we would metagame to that extent. So anyway, anal rape every night, et cetera. I'd seen it before, so it wasn't a shock. Sad way to end a pretty cool character, though. Like a Tomb of Horrors insta-death trap, but with more rape.

Apparently they're still playing that game, 6 months later....

>> No.19359213


Jesus, what is with that guy and rape? Does he understand you can have major events happen without someone taking a dick to the ear?

>> No.19359218

>Apparently they're still playing that game, 6 months later....
You got that right captcha.

>> No.19359325

Now that I think about it, DM hasn't run or been in a game where there hasn't been a ton of rape. I'm not going to tell you about the game where we were all kids... that's too creepy to relate. But I will tell you about a game which had a tasteful, well-played rape incident... which then went horribly awry.

Little Sister's player was actually running this game, and she was pretty good at it. Really focussed hard on the roleplaying aspects, had tough, cinematic combat when needed, but didn't bog the game down too much. She was also lenient, so if your character got messed up because you couldn't possibly know any better, she'd find an out for you... usually with some sort of horrible (but fun) strings attached.

This was Shadowrun, and DM (I'll keep calling him that, for continuity's sake) wanted to play a female mage. All of DM's characters are female, by the way. He says it's because he's played every possible male character... yeah. Anyway. And his idea was that she'd have a sugar daddy, an influential judge who'd buy her stuff and get her out of jail (a level 3 contact), who also happened to know her dad, the head of the local branch of Lonestar. He had a long-term plan for this character, where she'd get raped and mistreated and gradually turn to the dark side (does this sound familiar?).

>> No.19359331

My character was a doctor, a shapeshifter who never shifted, trying his best to live an ordinary human life as his adoptive parents had taught. Now, DM wanted desperately to expose this secret. I had masking and hiding feats all over the place, trying to stay one step ahead. But DM played every session, and I had to miss a few, and he eventually got enough karma to get an extra initiate level. And immediately decided to check if any of her friends was secretly a shapeshifter, because obviously that's what you would do when you gained an ability like that.

Okay, whatever. He got his little victory, and in the end I got to meet his character's gypsy grandma and learn some magic from her. So our characters became uneasy friends.

Now, we were investigating a college athlete. Well, not so much investigating as trying to frame. A pro team wanted to sign him for cheap, so they figured they'd cause a scandal that would make all the other teams not want to sign him... and they needed someone to make him look bad. We settled on a two-prong tactic. Two other characters and I would bust into his school locker and plant some drugs, while DM's character would use her astronomical charisma and spells to seduce him (he was basically Tom Brady, super religous, million dollar smile, avowed virgin).

>> No.19359347


You need to run a game and have his character kidnapped, but never raped. Instead, they get something incredibly loving and tender, like he's snuggled with kittens, until his character becomes a simpering Disney Princess-esque mushball. And when he complains, tell him it's just the same stunt he does with everyone else, and if he wants to DM again, he's gotta learn to roll with it and either be the Rapunzel or agree to keep the rapes to once per two campaigns.

>> No.19359357

So she wakes up the morning after their third date with a sore anus and no memory of the night before. Immediately comes to my character, because a) doctor; b) not even human; and c) she's not going to the police with this. We roleplayed this super well... I was all professional, she was all distraught, and the other party members were just the right amount of pissed off when they heard. And the adventure that followed, finding the real rapist (frame job, it turned out) was excellent. It was exactly what the Little Sister scenario could have been.

However.... DM had a chance here for some great character development. He could have changed his character's slutty ways, had her become a bit fearful of men, dealt with flashback and the various other issues that accompany rape.

Instead, she became an anal slut. Decided that really, she liked it. Fucked everything that moved. Excruiciating detail of the first time she did a troll, and how her anus was ripped and bleeding. And my character, the doctor, had to deal with all of it. It derailed the game time after time. She did develop an addiction to the drugs I prescribed her (some Valium-like thing)... could have been a good twist... but this was used more for comedic effect than anything else.

I can't quite remember how that campaign ended, but it was something sad. DM got irritated that he couldn't get everything he wanted and basically banned Little Sister from his house (where we always played). Something like that.

>> No.19359375


Why exactly do you still play with DM? You have yourself, another guy, Little Sister and her sister. You have enough for a party.

Stop inviting him. What's the worse he can do if he's not allowed to come along, write horrible rape porn with you guys?

>> No.19359393

This. DM sounds like he totally ruins things for you guys.

>> No.19359395

I know! But it's not just him. There are three of them in that group who are very much into the rapiness. While I was out of town one weekend, they had two sessions of roleplaying an orgy. All guys, all with female characters, two of whom were initially unwilling (but, in classic hentai style, grew to love it when they were forced to come). Probably ten hours of orgy roleplay.

This is when I realized exactly why I'm most comfortable hanging around with our resident transvestite, as opposed to the guys who want to keep their penises. At least she's got a normal view of sexuality.

This would be glorious. I am setting up an online game for us, and I will totally build this into the plan. Troll powers: activate!
> once per two campaigns
I laughed.

>> No.19359405

In a recent game the DM killed the party with the official quest giver (tm) by having him cast chain lightning on us and do 90+ damage, we are level 5 with ~35 hp each. Why did he do this? Well after we went through his dumb puzzles and got the macguffin, the guy instantly turns up demands the item, we ask where the payment is and he kills us. One player with evasion saved, taking no damage, so he instakilled her next round, rolling nothing but a d20, saying that even on a 1 it would still hit and kill the player. End of session. Next week we were raised by 2 out of the 4 gods in the setting, with the claim that the item he took was used to kill a god, which was apparently our fault (so says the good god and a letter from the other good god who is now dead who could predict the future). Also Asmodeus was there for no reason.


>> No.19359414


And if he gets his new princess raped, just have her kidnapped again and build her up to be a different Disney princess. He's got about twelve mind-breaking rape orgies he'd have to hunt down in your game and convince you to let him get before he'd run out of princesses, but even then you can probably start breaking out things like Sailor Scouts or other magical pretty girls.

>> No.19359416

A number of reasons. You're just hearing the bad parts... 95% of the time, the games we play are great. Also, we're friends outside of gaming, and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. It's a delicate situation. This is pretty much all these guys have... I have other friends and activities, but they don't. And I like them, and want to hang out with them... and that involves playing RPGs.

We actually moved to board games for 6 months on my suggestion. It was really good. But then the Shadowrun itch took over again, and we went back to that.

>> No.19359417

I have an femnazi gestapo-level ex-girlfriend who thought that's the correct way to react to rape. Which is healthier than I don't know, refusing to interact with anyone male ever again, but hey.

>> No.19359421

>>19351362 ITT: Shit GMs do that piss you off.

Not letting me do whatever I want.

>> No.19359472

>Allowing players to use the Magic Items section of the book like a mail-order catalogue

Not thread related, but you gave me an Idea, when the players ask for a certain item stating ' I want this' you can make them search for it, even a bit overpriced, OR, use Crazy Abdul's Magic Compendium, they give you a catalogue similar to the MIC, but the catch is that every single one of the items are made by dick ass genies.

>> No.19359490

"You buy used Amulet of Protection +3! Better than new!"

>> No.19359511

Only Mildly Cursed!

>> No.19359513

here. We have met three of these international magic item shop wizards already.

>> No.19359542

Ugh, I hate campaigns where you can just shop the magic items you want, it ruins the whole magic and mystery aspect. Whatever happened to the AD&D style magic item creation where every item was A) unique and B) you needed to research and collect all the required components yourself?

>> No.19359582

>Saving a BBEG from complete and total asspulls
>When he won't pull any punches to kill off characters and pick fights with the group

What pissed me off is how my beardy Monk (L5R) utterly destroyed that pathetic Samurai and the DM had to pull a shugenja out of his own ass to save the poor fucker who was at least 5 insightsranks over my character.

He admited later that he did wrong and this will never happen again. Ok, we are bros I forgave him, but this was bullshit.

>> No.19359617

3e happened. One of the developers of 5e has written a blog post about it.


>> No.19359631

>The fact I can't make jokes with him anymore about the game because if I come up with an idea, somehow, someway, it will make it into the game.
And this is how Horo-Russ married my Salamander's great great great great great-grandson.

>> No.19359807

Okay, so I'll quit ragging on DM for a little bit and tell you about something I did that pissed my players off. Well, two of my players. Two of them thought it was the greatest thing ever, and one diplomatically didn't express an opinion.

I was running a D&D game, my first time running a game for this group. It was DM, Little Sister, and guys I'll call Hack and Slash (because all of his characters are unsubtle combat monsters), Witch Hunter, and Silent But Deadly. Game setup took a month, with everyone building way more complicated characters than I was expecting. This was our first D&D game in over a year, so I guess there was some excitement. I told them that they'd be in the guard of a major port city, and it would be an X-Files sort of game.

DM wanted to run a cavalier. An AD&D first edition cavalier, with all the ridiculous bonuses and automatic stat gains and so on. He'd even converted the class to second edition and added some features! Ten pages! Why not? No, it won't be unbalanced. You're not letting me play a psionicist, so if I can't play this, then we're not playing the campaign. *sigh* Sure, whatever. Be a cavalier. Remember, though, you're in the city guard, in a game where I'm telling you that you won't be able to fight everything directly. And your class description, on page six of ten here, says you can't retreat from battles. You're sure? I guess....

>> No.19359829

considered it a challenge worthy of my game mastering skills.

Our first half dozen sessions went along great. I set up mysteries, Witch Hunter took the party lead and did a great job, there were convoluted schemes and extradimensional horrors and a King of Dragons-like combat against two giant silkworms with razor-sharp teeth suspended from a factory ceiling. 30 rounds of tense combat, took an hour IRL. Fuck yeah I'm efficient. Some noble ladies were seduced, some criminals were falsely accused and saved from hanging, and the new prophet of the region's major religion was pretty obviously undead (though no one would believe it).

The best part was that they really started to care about the townspeople. During their guard duties, they'd run across Miller Akon, spending everything he had on a new gown for his wife to wear to the coronation celebrations. Or Little Petey, the loveable orphan. Or Erd the blacksmith, who shod their horses for free because they'd solved a minor dispute involving his neighbour. Yeah, it's cliched, but it fucking worked.

So when they came across Miller Akon bawling his eyes out on the road to the logging village, they were genuinely upset. His wife was missing, and, and, and.... Well, they went to have a look.

>> No.19359843


At this point, I should interject an incident. Part of the cavalier class is that the cav can pick the best horse of any bunch, with the least flaws. Now, all the horses these guys had were supplied by the guard. I went out of my way to make up little cards for them. "Nightingale. Black mare, sturdy and strong, good jumper, bites, and is hesitant to cross water." No in-game effect really, just for roleplaying fun.

DM had a fucking fit. His class SAID he gets a perfect horse. It's right in the books! Blah blah blah. It was a half an hour of arguing before I read the rule to him. Then he said, "Yeah, but in the version of the class I made and you said I could use, I get a perfect horse." "Look, the only reason you get to see these cards is because you're a cavalier. That's the bonus you get." There was much sulking. He was already upset because he couldn't use his lance to charge down petty thieves in the city streets, and this was icing on the cake as far as he was concerned.

So they get to the village, all rolling hills and woods. What they found was not good. Miller Akon's door was torn from its hinges, claw marks all over the place. Hack and Slash uses a ranger ability to determine they are wolf-like, but bigger. Hack and Slash and DM go and get the blacksmith to forge some crude silver weapons, because they're metagamers. Silent But Deadly already had a silver dagger. LS, WH and SBD continue investigating. There are reports of a suave stranger who charmed all the village women with his style and aplomb, then disappeared... right around the time Mrs. Akon did.

>> No.19359848

So it turns out that Mrs. Akon is dead. Torn to shreds and scattered all over the woods. Discussion heats up at this point, with the players literally yelling at each other over what to do. (This is the greatest praise a DM can have, I think.) The other two show up with their silver weapons and bad news. Mrs. Erd has also gone missing... they heard her screams and followed them to her house, where they saw her being carried off. The culprit has just run this way. (What a coincidence.)

A few tracking rolls later and they're at the entrance to a cave. They squeeze in, being careful as fuck, because last time they did this they got mauled by mutant vampire bats. (The actual culprit in that case was a carpenter's apprentice with a probiscus hidden deep in his mouth, but anyway....) Twenty feet in, there's a hole with a bit of smoke coming up. They drop down one at a time and look around.

This cave has been furnished. There's a coal-burning stove, soot-covered walls, and a pile of blankets in one corner. Oh, and a chest, which upon further inspection is filled with small bones, probably from some sort of rodent. Nothing. Shit, we know they came this way, though. They're halfway out when they hear the banging. Hack and Slash walks over to the stove. What? Is there someone in there? How can that be?

>> No.19359858

It's a couple of minutes before Witch Hunter figures out that the sound is coming from *under* the stove. They drag it aside (carefully--it's hot!) and pull up a trap door. And there she is, bound and fearful. Silent But Deadly scoops her up without a word and heads for the rope as quickly as he can. He's a smart fellow. Little Sister pokes the until-now-ignored pile of blankets.

Out pops a screaming, gnashing elf, glowing short sword in hand. Witch Hunter tries to dispel magic... the sword drops, and the man morphs into a snarling mass of fur and teeth and spit. LS dodges--barely--and runs for her life. She was low on hp from a previous encounter. Hack and Slash, true to form, engages, as does DM. DM attacks with his silver club. Hit, but no visible damage. He drops almost immediately from two claws and a bite, and storms off in a huff.

Wait, what? A werewolf that's immune to silver? Bullshit, everyone calls. I shake my head. Keep playing.

>> No.19359867

The party gets positively ravaged. SBD drops back down to provide defense. Hack and Slash gets bitten twice. Witch Hunter is doing okay, and even scores some damage with an improvised strike from the fire poker. (What? That's not silver!) Finally, Hack and Slash gets pissed off, wrestles the creature into its own trap, and Witch Hunter stuns it long enough for them to get the door shut. Hack and Slash pulls out a bottle of Greek fire (fuck, I think internally, I told them that didn't exist in this setting... whatever) and bombs it down the hole, tossing a couple of coals after. The smell of burning fur and flesh fill the air as much as the hideous cries and screams, and then all is silent.

Everyone sits around catching their breath. It was a spectacular combat, one of the best I've ever run. I'm super proud of myself. Then Hack and Slash's player gets up. "Fucking bullshit. I'm not playing as a stupid fucking werewolf." And he puts on his shoes, slams the door, and leaves. DM is off in bed by this point, refusing to come back for the same reason.

Everyone looks at me, not sure what to say. I speak first. "The punchline is... that was a wolfwere."

And sudden realization dawns on everyone's faces.

>> No.19359872

The game didn't continue after that. I like to think DM and Hack were too embarrassed with themselves to continue. But anyway... I could see them posting their side of it in this thread.
> DM told us it was a werewolf
> silver weapons didn't work
> constantly hinting we should run away
> all because he wanted to have a chase scene in his stupid story
> later says it was a wolfwere

>> No.19359922

Posted this in another thread, but meh, think it belongs here.
>Play fighter with a wizard and a cleric
>Dungeon crawling all day erry day
>All the doors in all the places are locked/barred/enchanted
>Try to break through a couple doors
>18 strength, good rolls
>DM flat out tells me "no"
>Ask for explanation, he refuses, says "It'd ruin the game"
>Have to solve shitty puzzles or solve incredibly convoluted riddles to open doors leading to empty rooms
>Next level up, take a level in rogue for some lockpicking
>He looks over my sheet and gives me this dirty fucking look
>"You are now in a forest!"
>Middle of a dungeon crawl
>No more doors ever, no more level ups either

>> No.19359957

If you couldn't break the doors, what made you think you were going to be able to pick them?

>> No.19359992

Our wizard's knock spell worked when he actually decided to prepare it and not bitch about taking up a spell slot, so I figured it was worth a shot.

>> No.19359996

This has way too much promise. The GM dickery in me is positively bubbling.

Ring of comprehend languages. It steals yours to add to its own collection when you take it off.

Wand of summoning. The things you summon are actually teleported here... they can't be dispelled and don't have any obligation to obey you.

Boots of speed. Don't actually shield your body from the effects, so you end up with the occasional sprained knee and arthritis.

>> No.19360038

>>Not punishing stupid players who hog up hours of table time at a once a week game to do stupid shit like look for natural drugs in the woods or try and trick them GM into believing there was loot found that wasn't.

>> No.19360070

I had a character who I roleplayed as kind of cowardly. The GM decided to give me an extra flaw where I couldn't act at all in combat until I made a will save.

>> No.19360106

That would piss me off, too. Did you at least get some extra character points or something for it?

>> No.19360130

That's it? It all ended because the metagamers assumed it was a wereworlf? Fuck, I would've loved to be in your campaign!

>> No.19360491

>playing Dead Reign
>My character absolutely despises zombies, does everything in his power to kill as many as possible, while staying alive
>GM has a half living with a juggernaut zombie follower GMNPCs join us
>Look at the GM, he's slyly smiling at me
>put up with it for the remainder of the session
>Night time, camp set up, half living and jug in the same tent
>wake up other players, tell them to get a safe distance
>put a propane tank at the entrance to the jug's tent
>break off the valve, propane is leaking
>wait a minute
>GM is looking a little mad
>pop open a flare
>toss it at the propane ta-
>"You can't kill the NPCs"
>Ask the GM why
>They're part of the story
>Explain that that's BS, My char would definitely kill the zombies
>Are you sure?
>flare ignites the propane, GM "rolls damage" (at least 10 dice were heard rolling behind his screen, looks at the dice for about a half a second)
>The jug jumps up, is on fire, runs at me before I can react, pins me down, lights me on fire, and punches my skull in, before I can aim and fire, even though I was a good 30 ft away.

Granted, An exploding propane tank MIGHT not have killed a juggernaut, but it likely would have, he could have obliged me by actually looking at the dice, also, he said the jug's body protected the half living.

>> No.19360672

Not the guy your responding to, but I get a bit wary of seeing "I put alot of thought into my character!". 90% of the time, its some minmaxing that guy (not you inparticular, just from experience), that litterally makes combat last 30min when his comes around, nickle and dimeing everything, and breaks a class to the point where a high tier BBEG-like creature loses 94% of its life in one swing. Combat should be a part of a character choice but building one on that and giving the party a immortality complex because they kiss the ass of this minmaxer realy throws off the curve. Suddenly, we have to go up against something 11 levels above us in order to have any sense of mortality, and the rest of us who enjoy the RP and didnt create a shambling mass of calculations on hit, are torn apart.
One thing im glad to hear though is in 5e playtest they gave DM's more of a choice in rp situations. I can actually bluff instead of counting situational feats and what not that I'd have to stack in order to not be usless. (usually this is homeruled anyway in games I play but some DM's hug the guide book like a bible and roll because they feel they have to).
But thats just me

>> No.19361112

Aw, thanks. I would have loved to have you in my campaign.

> They're part of the story
A good DM would have set up a reason for your character to accept this necessary evil. You know... made them part of the story. Maybe this particular one holds the key to curing zombiedom, if only you can get it to the right person. Maybe... fuck it, I don't know. That was pretty heavy-handed.
> punches my skull in

> whole post was just to make that joke

>> No.19361445

Hey everyone, awesome thread.

Some advice, please.

I've played DnD and some other games sonce high school (a friend of mine and I tried to make our own once, worked out pretty well). Recently I've started DMing a game involving some of my very close friends, none of whom have ever played anything like DnD before.

So, first off, it's been going great. They've taken to it very well, lots of fun, so on and so forth. My main question for all the vets is: What can I do to encourage the party to actually play as their characters instead of metagaming? I really want us to start actually role-playing, building characters, relationships, all that good stuff, but I've found myself in the classic trap of just saying the same thing over and over again and hoping for different results.


If anyone's interested in the campaign, it involves a metal cube containing a forced-into-creation god that the party found on their first adventure. They don't know what it is or how to open it yet, just that it feels un-natural to hold.

>> No.19362114

Don't really know what you mean about repeating the same things, but you have to call out your players on their metagaming. "I'm sorry, but there's just no feasible way for your character to know that." Don't need to be harsh, just be stern in that metagaming breaks the game.

>> No.19362728


I've always run D&D with a very simple formula. Right after character gen and worked out why the party is a party I will unceremoniously dump them in an inn. Then I will equally unceremoniously dump a well-paying quest in their laps. Usually something along the lines of the party finding out that the king or a local lord or baron is looking to hire adventurers to fix a problem. Frequently this problem will be agricultural, like a curse on crops or the weather. Nothing world-ending, but important to the nation/area.

The quest will be seeded with numerous decisions the party can make in order to get through things, such as how to deal with a competing party of adventurers, or a village of widely-considered-evil humanoids surrounding their destination. There will probably be a TWEEST somewhere. Finally, the quest will usually end with them retrieving a MacGuffin that will fix the problems. However, it will also be something the party can take advantage of should they choose to.

Generally, this will all take the party up to level 2. They'll have made allies, maybe enemies, and influenced local events. From this point I should have enough material to spin out an entire campaign based on my party's actions. I find players engage with plots that stem directly from themselves far more than anything else.

Consider this in your campaign. Make it about the ramifications of what they choose to do with this baby god. Players LOVE seeing the effects they have on a setting.

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