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16320989 No.16320989 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

All right. I finally have time. So I'm going to tell you a story.

In Deffwotch, the players are Orks who trick the Imperium into thinking they're Spess Mehreens. The first session was Monday, but I had too much work to tell the full story.

So I'll tell it now.

>> No.16321005
File: 194 KB, 450x270, F5F5F5.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321005

You better not disappoint us, Shas.

>> No.16321014

FUCK!
I was just about to go to sleep. Now I have to stay awake.

>> No.16321020

F MOTHER FUCKING 5

>> No.16321026
File: 2.86 MB, 3160x2272, Ork Krooza.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321026

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c51xQc03W6Y

IN THE GRIM DARKNESS OF THE FAR FUTURE, WAR RAGES THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY
MANKIND IS UNDER SIEGE ON ALL SIDES FROM XENOS, HERETICS, AND THE TAINT OF CHAOS
THE SPACE MARINES, THE IMPERIUM'S FINEST SOLDIERS, BRING WAR TO THE ENEMIES OF MAN.
THEIRS IS AN ENDLESS FIGHT, AS THEY WORK TO SAVE MANKIND FROM ALL ITS FOES.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRp_mVi969I

DIS AIN'T DERE STORY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whxcq4I0kAo

SOMEWHERE IN DEEP SPACE, A BUNCH OF ORKS HAVE DONE DA IMPOSSIBLE!
DEY'VE TRICKED DA IMPERIUM INTO THINKIN' DEY'Z SPESS MEHREENS!
DA STUPID 'UMIES AIN'T EVA GONNA KNOW WHAT HIT'EM!
OUT ON THE LOOTED REPULSIVE CRUISER "DA LOOTED KROOZA," TROUBLE BREWS...

>> No.16321030

>>16321014
This. But possibly I will just read it later.

>> No.16321041
File: 255 KB, 806x719, Ork Kunnin'.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321041

Sitting on the bridge of the Repulsive Class Looted Grand Cruiser, the Kill Team revel over all that they survey.
Kroz Rubbykonzes - Flyboy
Grimslag 'Eadmangla - Kommando
Wazgor Shakbag - Stormboy
Grakgut Grumwizzlewot - Painboy
(The last character was unable to make it this session)

Kroz is asleep at the wheel, while Wazgor and Grakgut are fightin' each other, arguin' over who's da boss. 'Eadmangla's hiding somewhere.
"Oy, boss! We'ze got a problem!" the suddenly voxcaster blares.
"Wot?" yells Grakgut.
"A problem, boss!"
"Wot ya mean, a problem?" yells Wazgor.
"Zog it! Let'z make dis fing go!" declares Grakgut, who hits the Big Red Button of their ship.

The ship shudders a bit, power flows, and then, nothing

"...dat's wot i'z tryin' ta tell ya, boss!" says the voice on the Voxcaster.
"Well fix it!" yells Wazgor.
"I'z tryin' ta-oh." says the voice on the voxcaster as it walks onto the command bridge.

>> No.16321059
File: 110 KB, 500x500, ork science.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321059

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji3aAIyJKbA

The players see the Mekboy Uzgob and the Painboy Grakkar. Uzgob looks up, realizes he's on the bridge, and tosses the voxcaster away.
"Yeah, boss, dat's da problem."
"Well? Spit it out!" says 'Eadmangla.
"One of da nobs, git named Skarfang, holed 'imself up in Engin-...Engina-...in da Enjinz!" states Grakkar.
"Git stole some bits to me Skanna Jamma!" cries Uzgob.
"Calls 'imself boss now!" adds Grakkar.

"We got a vox down dere?" asks Wazgor.
Uzgob passes Wazgor another voxcaster.
"OY! WHO'Z DOWN DERE?"
"ZOG OFF!" a voice replies.

"DAT GIT! 'OW CAN 'E SAY 'EZ DA BOSS WHEN I'Z DA BOSS?" says Wazgor.
"WOT? I'Z DA BOSS!" replies Grakgut.
"ZOG IT, I'Z GONNA KRUMP 'IM GOOD!" yells 'Eadmangla.
"WOT'S ALL DIS DEN?" says Kroz as he wakes up.
"Git claims 'ez boss in Enjinz! I'z gonna rip 'is arms off!" says Grakgut as everyone begins running full stop toward the Plasma Reactors.
"Oy, wait for me!" yells Kroz as he begins running after the very angry collection of orks.

>> No.16321081
File: 125 KB, 550x546, Digganob.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321081

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atKUCxXanXA

A few minutes of running, and the players hear a noise behind them. Revving his engines, the players hear a different voice.
"Need a lift, boss?"
Clarence, the Digganob, pulls up in his buggy. The players all hop in.
"Shotgun!" yells Grimslag.
"Where?" replies Wazgor.

Clarence brings the players to the edge of the Enginarium. He stops at a large welded door.
"Hmm. That's not good. That door should have opened." says Clarence.
The door appears to have been welded shut, rather shittily. The terminal's also been smashed.
Kroz sticks some random gubbins in the terminal, and tries to fix it. Surprisingly, he succeeds. Unfortunately, the weld-job holds and the door remains shut.
'Eadmangla puts on his Preysense goggles, and sees the outlines of a trio of grots in a nearby grate. They are muckin' about.

"Dey'z muckin' about! Dat ain't right!" says 'Eadmangla as he punches out the grates and scares off the grots.
The terminal tells Kroz that the grate leads deeper into the Enginarium, so the players all hop into the grate, and begin walking.

As the players walk, two pass their Awareness. While travelling the grates, they see a cardboard box.

"Oy, wotz dat box doin' dere?" asks 'Eadmangla.
"I'z helpin', boss!" says the box.

>> No.16321099
File: 14 KB, 253x290, Solid Ork.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321099

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUHJsU_ooWQ

The box flips up. The Kommando Pliskin looks to the players with his one good eye, the other under an eyepatch.
"Wot're ya doin' down 'ere, Pliskin?" asks Wazgor.
"Skoutin'."
"Right proppa, Pliskin!" says 'Eadmangla.
"Skarfang's looted all da gubbins I looted for you, so 'ez got quite da loadout."
"Where iz 'e? I want 'iz arms!" yells Grakgut.
"Why ya want 'iz arms?" asks Kroz.
"'ow do we get ta 'im?" asks 'Eadmangla.
"Dere'z two ways. Da brutally kunnin' way is down dat way. It brings ya out back." Pliskin points deeper in the vent.
"An' da other?" asks Wazgor.
"Da kunningly brutal way is out dere," Pliskin says, pointing at a grate out of the vents, "Leads ya straight to 'im!"
"Right den! Good on ya, Pliskin!" says 'Eadmangla.
"I'll be 'round, boss!" says Pliskin as he gets under his box and walks off.

'Eadmangla and Grakgut decide to take the back. Kroz and Wazgor decide to give the front a go. Both teams attempt to synchronize their entrance to the cargo hold that Skarfang is in. They decide to bash down the doors at the same time. Unfortunately, and rather hilariously, the rear team fails to break down the door, while the front team succeeds.

>> No.16321116
File: 133 KB, 400x400, ork waaagh.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321116

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r73kioYMULo

"Oy, wot da-Oh Zog! Rokk'em, boyz!" yells Skarfang in Mega Armor as his six boyz ready their shootas.

Wazgor uses his surprise round to Rokkit straight into Skarfang while Kroz unloads with his Snazzgun. By the time Skarfang gets his bearings, it's time to roll initiative. 'Eadmangla focuses on the boyz while Grakgut rushes in with his Big Choppa. Kroz stays back with his Snazzgun while Wazgor continues to tank Skarfang like a boss. Grakgut gets a fair bit of pain on Skarfang, but the final bit of damage comes from 'Eadmangla, as a bolt round detonates right in Skarfang's chest. The players finish up the rest of the boyz handily.

>> No.16321120
File: 460 KB, 216x152, 1234303454601.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321120

Oh my god oh my god oh my god

>> No.16321139
File: 104 KB, 550x742, ork commissar.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321139

"I'z takin' his arms!" yells Grakgut.
Grakgut proceeds to rip Skarfang's arms off. Kroz works on separating the Heavy Bolter from the pile of giblet that is Skarfang. 'Eadmangla calls for Clarence, and Wazgor calls for a dok.

"Don't worry, boss. I got you." says Clarence as he drives through a nearby weakened wall. He brings the players up to the Dok's Office, which is conveniently located next to Engineering. Grakgut works on healing everyone, as Pliskin shows up and passes a sparkly bit to Uzgob.

"Dat's it!" Uzgob yells as he runs to a big sparking clanking monstrosity and tosses the sparky bit in.
"ZOg is dat?" asks Kroz.
"Da Skanna Jamma! Steals da signals da 'umies send out! Da beakies neva hear'em, you do, and you can steal da fights!"
"I like it!" yells Grakgut, "'Ey, Uzgob, get on da table!"
Uzgob gets on the table as Grakgut knocks him out. He chops off an arm, and replaces it with Skarfang's. A medicae roll of 3 says the operation takes flawlessly.
"Wot da-oh. Heh, thanks boss." says Uzgob. He tests out his new arm by punching out a grot.
"Itz...It'z alive!" yells Wazgor.
"Dat's a marvel o' modern medaceen!" says 'Eadmangla.
"Who'z next?" asks Grakkar.

We called the session there.

>> No.16321144
File: 21 KB, 350x350, 1315193756197.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321144

>> No.16321168
File: 345 KB, 853x797, Looted Emperor.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321168

Sifting through the pile of crap Skarfang had, the players increased by 5 Profit Factor and 1000 xp.

Overall, I can say that attempting to put music DURING the IRC game is too much of a hassle to do. I probably won't be doing that. However, the attached music would have been played during each encounter. I can also say that IRC games take a bit longer (though starting at 8:30 and ending at midnight didn't quite help the cause). I fully expect things to go faster in the future as players learn the intricacies of their characters and the system.

Our next session is Monday, and I should hopefully have the next story ready by Wednesday.

>> No.16321186

>Pliskin
>Clarence

Best NPCs ever

>> No.16321194

Fuck, I so would wish to be in a game made of this much win.

>> No.16321199
File: 312 KB, 160x120, 1adf642d9c428d6d05d2f43d250520f0.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321199

That is fucking glorious.

>> No.16321205
File: 262 KB, 826x667, UltraCockBlawk.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321205

Will we need an ork version of this soon Shas'o?

Awesome story eitherway.

>> No.16321226

>>16321205

Da Kodex Astartiz don't support dis...oh zog it! WAAAAGH!

>> No.16321258
File: 61 KB, 700x500, Ork Hot Rod.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321258

While it is unfortunate that the time for stories seems short, remember that for my last game I would tell 2-3 stories at a time. As I am attempting to keep this one on time, there will only be one story per week.

>> No.16321266

>>16321258
>that image
Has anyone goneso far as to convert a Looted Gundam?

>> No.16321332

this is so dumb

yet its so good

>> No.16321385

Am I the only one who wants to see this turned into some kind of tv series? With Da Ork Song as the theme tune?

>> No.16321414
File: 7 KB, 228x221, sadfrog.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
16321414

>>16321385

It's got a theme song, a cast of powerful protagonists, hilarious support characters, and endless action.

It will never sell...

>> No.16321443

>>16321414

Not to mention gratuitous violence and endless excuses for car chases. Plus, with "zog" replacing all the swear words and no sexual references to make, there's little risk of parents kicking up a fuss (except about the violence, of course).

>> No.16321478

The primary goal here appears to be to steal fights from da 'umies.

'Umies call ass-tartitz when da foightin gets real gud.
Da Looted Krooza shows up and takes da fun part for itself!

>> No.16321516

>>16321478

If you're the same Kroz from the story, how is Shas'o as a GM?

>> No.16321576

>>16321516
yeah, I'm usually anonymously around but its only propa when speaking of a game I'm in.

Its only been one session, and the usual great-wonderful-luck of the internets made sure my connection was happy and fine right up until game start (thus me losin the first few minutes to da snoozin), so can't really give true praise or criticism but for a first session he had a gud'nuff knowledge of the rules to run it, and seems receptive enough to player ideas and alternate routes.

Its lookin good.

>> No.16322447

Bump for night crowd

>> No.16322485

>>16321205
"DA BIG BOOK O' STRATETEG-STRAGE-STRATA-FIGHTIN' WELL DOESN'T TINK DIS IS A GUD IDEA, BOSS!"

>> No.16322503

>>16322485
"YA GIT! DATZ DA BOX! YOUZE GOTTA TINK OUT DA BOX, OR IZ GUNNA KRUMP YA IN DAT WEENIE BOX!"

>> No.16322506

>>16322485

"I DUN NEED A BOOK TA TELL ME 'OW TA FIGHT, YA GIT!"

>> No.16323383

Wot are you lot doin' bein' somewhere dat 'aint da front page?
Youz muckin' about!

>> No.16323580

One last bump for the late night

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