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16006276 No.16006276 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

That Guy...That Fucking Guy...

That Guy general.

I just returned from a local RPG convention. I had the (foolish) idea that it would be a nice place to meet new players. I was wrong. Dead wrong.

I decided to GM a Supers game, based on the Second World War using DC Adventures and some golden age super heroes. The game was supposed to be wacky, light hearted and with comics like violence of the 40's (So you get Bucky smiling happily as he butchers german soldiers with a machine gun)

Anyway, the first player enters. Fat. Has a huge neckbeard. Acne everywhere. His teeth were a mess of yellow, green and black.

I should've packed my shit and left, but no. I though "Never judge a book by it's cover (Tee hee!)"

Boy was I wrong.

>> No.16006292
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go on...

>> No.16006310
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I explained to him what I was about to run, gave him several sheets for him to choose. He nodded and smiled. And then he said:
"That's cool and all, but I'm looking for a campaign."

I blinked for a moment, but nothing out of the ordinary right? I explained to him this was a one shot type of deal, no biggie right? He didn't look happy. He then proceed.

"Geez fine...Fine. I don't want to be a good guy though. Do you got a cool character in this supers game?"

Looking around, I had Black Terror sheet on me.

I explained I refflufed him to be more of a Anti-Hero, a corsair for the USA, attacking and killing the Japanese at every turn.

"Good. I don't want to work with the others though."

>> No.16006346
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"What do you mean?"

He then got closer to me. I could smell his scent. It smelled as if a Big Mac just died in front of me.

"I don't like working together with other players."

I was...Confused. I tried to explain him that having moments just for your character are generally ok, but there are other people in the table too. And this is a convention, I need to make sure everbody has a good time.

He nodded, sat in front of me in silence. I knew I should've kicked him out that instant. But I didn't. I was weak.

>> No.16006352

>"Good. I don't want to work with the others though."
Oh, God.

>> No.16006376

Kill it with fire. Don't bother to grace the ashes with your piss.

>> No.16006380
File: 6 KB, 200x200, Avitus.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>He nodded, sat in front of me in silence. I knew I should've kicked him out that instant. But I didn't. I was weak.
You are a coward and a weakling fool. You are barely even a man.

>> No.16006382

So other players came from all over the con. Some took a look at my books, and sheets, some liked the premisse, others didn't even made eye contact with me...While That Guy stared.

When we finally got 6 players, I decided to pull the trigger.

I knew That Guy would try something stupid the moment we started the game, so I knew i had to start with him to get it out of his system. So I started by describing where his character was, his motivations, a bit of the past, and what is his current goal. Remember, this is a Con game, I need to be swift with the context so I can give the player a general idea of what he is playing. I'm always open to player suggestions and all that.

"I refuse to work for the USA".
"All right, so you are a Pirate?"
"No. My character does whatever he feels like. He feels like helping these costume losers because he gets to kill more japanese".

Stupid or not, it's a motivation for a con game, so I rolled with it.

I should've know better.

>> No.16006389
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>> No.16006395
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>> No.16006439
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All the other characters agreeded to play members of the Justice Society, so they all made it easier to explain their situation and why they were assigned for the task (Stop a giant Spider-Fortress from reaching Nagasaki, said spider had a huge ass canon that could've stop the atomic bomb, but I wasn't planning to mention the bomb, just imply it.)

So that guy starts innocently enough and role plays as the brooding loner of the team, helping but prancing around like he is god's gift to super heroes and belittling everyone.

Then after some dicking around and roleplaying, we finally got into our first little skimirsh.

Long story short: One of the players had a Mimic. A character that can copy powers. He got himself surrounded by a group of japanese zombie soldiers...So he decides to copy That Guy's character power.

He manages to survive the bullet storm and it's saved by a player playing Doctor Fate.

That Guy face lit up.

>> No.16006443

>He feels like helping these costume losers because he gets to kill more japanese
I've played my fair share of bloodthirsty pirates and I can lready see how this is going wrong.

>> No.16006460

>That Guy face lit up.
holy fuck, conventions are supposed to be no smoking zones, what a fucking asshole

>> No.16006468
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>That Guy face lit up.

>> No.16006480
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"What the fuck do you mean, he copies my power?"

The girl playing said character looked at him, scared.

"It's no biggie man, she just copies it if she sees it. She doesn't drain it or anything. Just calm down please."

He reached the first die in front of him and proclaimed.

"I will punch the shit out of the bitch. That way she will learn that only I can have my powers!"

He proceed to describe how his characters run towards the female player character abd sock her on the mouth.

For a moment, I didn't knew how to react. This never happened to me before.

>> No.16006485

>That Guy face lit up.
Oh no.
He tried to manipulate the other PC, didn't he?

>> No.16006501

What. The. Fuck.

>> No.16006504

At this point I would have just punched him in the face myself.
Good god what a dick.

>> No.16006533

This cool story bro would be better if you could tell stories better.

>> No.16006541
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He then starts belittling the player.

"Serves you right you cunt, why the fuck did you pick a copy cat bullshit like this? I run this fucking show."

He then describes how he characters storms the place.

In the middle of a warzone.

The girl looked annoyed, and I wanted to end this without getting any weirder. So I just threw a whole group encounter (He did run ahead after all) into his character.

A bad roll from his toughness killed him right there.

"Fucking shit GM man, god modder and shit."

"You are welcome to leave please. You can keep that sheet"

He looks like he is...About to cry.

"I just wanted to play a campaign! A long campaign and you fuckers ruined it for me."

He quietly leaves, as he entered.

I said I was sorry to the other players who were all happy it didn't get any more weird. So we restarted the game from sratch.

And it was fun.

But I will always remember the evening for the moment a huge, grown man describing how he is punching a woman in detail, to the face of a girl who couldn't be older than 15.

Share your stories.

Mine was of the first contact with one of the That Guys. I'm sure you guys got worst tales.

For my torment lasted for a day.

>> No.16006543 [DELETED] 
File: 49 KB, 378x378, costanza.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Saying "I didn't knew how to react."

>> No.16006557

I apologize, English is not my mother language and I just wanted to share this experience.

>> No.16006558


Jesus christ, how you could not have kicked him hard in the balls amazes me.
I would have choked him out ages before he did that shit. Disgusting pig.

>> No.16006561

Damn, that dude sounds like a fucking cunt.

>> No.16006563 [DELETED] 
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>mfw I was just about to post the exact same costanza post but got a "Duplicate File" error

>> No.16006564

You should have bitch slapped him with his chair.

>> No.16006572

I'm friends with the owner of the place, I didn't want to bring him trouble for slapping someone.

>> No.16006573

>a long campaign
>at a con
Christ, you have to wonder what he even came in thinking.

>> No.16006576


some people are just fucking weird, . maybe blown the whistle when he started the in detail punching if it was me but you did good op, not letting him spoil the game an all and handling it well.

>> No.16006579

>be playing WFRP with regular group
>lost a member gained a new guy, no big deal we still have full group
>guy proceeds to bring 3lbs of food with him to the game for the next 8 weeks eat all of it and then undo his pants while sitting in someone else's house full of people he doesn't know
>makes That Guy comments about GM's wife and my buddy's girlfriend
>Gm gets sick of his shit and announces to message board that the is kicked out rather than politley asking him to leave in private

Goddamn he was annoying.

>> No.16006580

At least he didn't do a ton of damage.

>> No.16006581
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>But I will always remember the evening for the moment a huge, grown man describing how he is punching a woman in detail, to the face of a girl who couldn't be older than 15.

Good God, I thought people like that existed only in anecdotes...

>> No.16006588

>letting a fat aspie neckbeard call a young lady "cunt"

I know it's not fashionable in this day and age to respond to such language with the seriousness it deserves, but by golly I would have engaged in fisticuffs with that delinquent until he properly apologized to the young lady.

>> No.16006590
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That chick would have earned a medal if she socked his heaving, gasping face hard upside the nose.

>> No.16006594

To be honest, I don't see how a creepy, violent psycho is at all out of place in your campaign where some people kill a lot of a particular ethnic minority to ensure civilians of that ethnic minority can be nuclear bombed.

>> No.16006598

Sounds like an average con player

>> No.16006614

Two of the heroes were Japanese.

Hiroshima in the game was occupied by Zombies and Demons.

Tojo had a faction of demons and Hirohito himself talked to the players about how they needed to secure the bombing.

Not a single Japanese person died in the game, just evil spirits, zombies and monsters.

I tried to be as PC as I could because I knew this could be a hairy subject matter.

(One of the players was Shinto Samurai and the other was Captain Nippon)

I refluffed the Captain to be a bit more heroic, the original was a legit evil guy even to the Japanese.

>> No.16006627


I should hope you would be using Queensbury rules, my good sir. Those of breeding such as ourselves must be above these savages for the good of society.

>> No.16006639

I'm sorry; I'm overly sensitive to this sort of thing because of my background but I'm not going to accept it. I appreciate you took steps, but those steps just produce a whitewashing of the historical event.

>> No.16006641
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I will share:
>playing D&D 3.5 as usual
>That Guy plays a LE Paladin that has harm spells instead of heal spells
>Yes I let him
>Let the party know in advance that the campaign is going to be tough as shit
>That Guy: "Bring it on I will rape anything that you send at me."
>He literally raped any enemy he could before they killed it
>It is apparently one of the Tenets of Evil he neglected to inform me of
>Other player (playing a CG Sorcerer) calls his shit
>He rapes and kills the male CG Sorcerer
>At this point, even the CE in the party hates him
>I decide to pull a "rocks fall everyone dies" on him
>Party goes into dungeon at around lvl 8
>He takes point
>Mindflayer jumps out from a crevice in a narrow tunnel
>Stuns the party
>Eats his brain, as he is "too badass and hot" to wear a helmet
>That Guy: "Bullshit, I should be allowed to grapple."
>Me: "You're stunned, but w/e."
>Mindflayer wins grapple
>eats his brain

Forgive me if the post gets duplicated, my internet is running slowly.

>> No.16006654
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>taking an anecdote as evidence that such people exist outside of anecdotes

>> No.16006661

>ethnic minority

I had no idea the Japanese were a minority IN THEIR OWN COUNTRY

>> No.16006663


I had no idea that people who formed opinions on other people based on those peoples' portayals in other peoples' anecdotes actually existed outside of anecdotes.

>> No.16006664
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>Hiroshima in the game was occupied by Zombies and Demons.
>Tojo had a faction of demons

That sounds amazing.

>> No.16006666

That's the most fucked up revisionist history of the Pacific Theater of WW2 I've ever seen.

>> No.16006669


The guy who wrote that is obviously a person of Japanese descent in a non-Japanese country.

>> No.16006674

I don't think a rpg played a con will affect anyone's opinion of WW2.

>> No.16006680

I gotta be honest.

I wonder just what events occur to give someone this much USI.

>> No.16006690

if you're at war with Japan, it's obvious the majority of the people you kill in that war will be Japanese, unless they have a shit-ton of foreign mercenaries.

>> No.16006715

I say, those of us of actual high breeding just tell our help to take the ruffian out back and take a cane to him. I cannot believe someone would stoop so low to touch a commoner like that fellow.

>> No.16006716 [DELETED] 

>Playing D&D 4E with bros.
>That Guy attempts to sex up a fine upstanding young lady in a bar.
>Rolls nat 1 for Diplomacy.
>DM: "Her husband, sitting next to her, smashes his glass over your head. You're unconscious."
>MFW this happens in EVERY TOWN we visit.
>mfw I have no face.

>> No.16006719

No, whitewashing would be changing the ethnicities involved into whites. What he did was supernaturalwashing. And it sounds kick ass, get off your high horse.

>> No.16006728

Look..Man. I agree with you.

But I was trying to play a Golden Age super hero game in the pacific islands. Have you read such comics? They were racist as shit, but it was another time. I decided to create an altrnate universe where Tojo went nuts and used a demonic pact to form a armie of demons and other monsters and attack America, who weren't innocent either (but that's another story, the setting is the same I use for my regular weekly game)

If it makes you feel better, the game is mostly about how mindless patriotism only fucks shit harder for everbody and how terrible war is. With bright capes and demons.

>> No.16006741

Everyone knows the ethnic majority in Japan consists of Korean immigrants, who their campaign was intended to free and raise to their rightful place over the minority japanese populace.

So Ethnic Minority Man up there is obviously angry his people are being treated like the oppressors they are. Makes sense, given the Japanese people's history of denying the rightful greatness of the almighty Korean Peoples of Japan, true rulers of Nippon.

>> No.16006743 [DELETED] 

>>MFW this happens in EVERY TOWN we visit.

He rolls a natural 1 for diplomacy in every town? That's really unlikely. He should check his dice.

>> No.16006751

>Story about the consequences of mindless patriotism and the horros of war
>With bright capes and demons

>> No.16006797

>the Horos of war

Oh good lord.

>> No.16006807



>> No.16006820

Indeed, indeed. In my last trip to the Indian subcontinent I'm afraid I have had to associate with those of a base and crude nature like the villain described above. As such, I have sometimes caught myself lapsing into their crude and uncultured vernacular.

Of course one should not sully their hands with this task and a cane drubbing is just the thing to give such a scoundrel what for.

>> No.16006830


On the contrary, dear sir. The worth of a man is in his hand's work, and I would not ask others to do for me what I would not do for myself.

>> No.16006839


Fuck that, I wanna just bash that fucker over the head with a folding chair.

>> No.16006842

Right right. Being around those savages in the Queen's India explains the rough attitude. Welcome back to the land of the civilized.

>> No.16006848

Yeah, I have had a look at them. Even this British thing called 'Darkie's War'.

Man, I'm sorry. I'm half-Native America half-Japanese. I got a history of getting fucked on one side and getting fucked and then fucking on the other. Sometimes I trip out a little at things like this.

>> No.16006857



>> No.16006863

Oh man that sucks. Were you in the death march? How about the American camps?

>> No.16006865


Of course I was referring to the fine gentleman here.


Gentlemen of breeding are above the common folk and must be addressed by their social equals in this telecomputing room.

>> No.16006889

It's always fun watching that guy's character get lynched by an angry mob while the rest of the party eggs them on.

>> No.16006890
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>> No.16006901

That Guys are rather quickly purged. Ultimately they get ignored until they leave.

>> No.16006903
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I am running Pimps in Space, and Rogue Trader decides he wants to "strike up a relationship" with the ship's Nurse. I particularly do not care.

His first course of action is to get her high with his quality grass, and then trick her into bed.

>Date rape. How fascinating.
"No no no, it's all good. It's consensual!"
>I doubt that.
"Don't worry! And then we..."

Rogue Trader goes through much detail over two or three sessions describing exactly what he is doing to her. Quite frankly, I had heard much worse from you all, so it did not really faze me.

However, one day at lunch, Voidmaster and Arch-Militant come up to me.

"Rogue Trader is getting creepy." states Voidmaster.
"Yeah, you really should stop him." adds Arch-Militant.
"I mean, you may be used to it, but it's really wrong." pipes in Voidmaster.
>Hmm, I agree. It is getting quite annoying. I do not wish to run that type of game. He must learn to keep his libido off my table. I have a strange feeling the problem will be solved next game.

>> No.16006909
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Next game comes, and once again, the fat Rogue Trader inflates, describing in graphic detail what he is doing to the Nurse, giggling and jiggling along the way. And then comes the sentence I knew he'd ask.

"Man, she's so hot. But I can't pin down the reference!" says Rogue Trader. He thinks I copied her out of some vidya.
>That's because there is no reference.
He stops. I lean in close.
>She's actually based off a very good friend of mine.
I had him now.
Rogue Trader literally deflates, turns red, starts stammering, "Oh, uh, uh, um, if I knew that, um, I w-would have never..."
I look at him with my deadest expression.
>But how could you know? You made your assumptions. And here we are.
Rogue Trader seems like's literally shrinking.
"Nice job, jackass." states the Seneschal.
"Maybe you'll stop now?" says the Voidmaster.
"Finally." says the Explorator.

As the game progressed, he made up some bullshit excuse about breaking up with the Nurse, and was more or less afraid of starting a new relation with an NPC. Which was perfectly fine by me.

>> No.16006921

...in my games, anyway.

The benefits of pure IRC gaming.

>> No.16006928

It's not a nat 1 for every town, but it's REALLY low. like between 1 and 4. His luck is just that bad.

>> No.16006946

>Implying Shas'o R'myr, Car Thief isn't THAT GUY

>> No.16006956

DIIICCCCKKK MOVE, you fantastic bastard.

In all seriousness, why the fuck do you keep that horrible player in your group, let alone allow him be the leader?

>> No.16006995

My family was massacreted by the Russians back when they first became communist just because they had a sightly big farm brought from my grand parents service in the military (He was just a soldier).

For generations everbody assumed we were communists in disguise, living in South America and all that. It's harsh to be mistaken by the people who killed family. It's not the same, but I know how it feels to be persecuted too. My game is about life. It's about how war is this messed up shit who murders families and the very reality, and how the innocence of the cape crusaders of old and their silly and sometimes violent antics plus their heroism shines through it all.

Peace, man.

>> No.16007007


>"I will punch the shit out of the bitch. That way she will learn that only I can have my powers!"

Oh god fuck, i can hardly bear to read any further. It's going to be really painful isn't it?

>> No.16007014

Oh, everyone know that, but he's an entertaining That Guy, so he gets a pass.

>> No.16007020

I don't know but I find this one hilarious

>> No.16007021


>why the fuck do you keep that horrible player in your group

Because he did work around my apartment, without being paid. All in all, he's not that bad a person outside a game, it's just that in game he turns...odd. His main problem was that if something didn't fit HIS perceptions, he would whine until you caved. And that was the thing. I never caved, and simply farmed his tears.

>let alone allow him be the leader

The class does not make the leader. In all reality, the Seneschal was the leader in all but name. Explorator and most of the team even swore fealty to him over RT.

But that game is over now. Just a story I felt like sharing.

>> No.16007041
File: 170 KB, 800x572, ejons.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>no date rape
>He must learn to keep his libido off my table.

These are not pimps in space or anywhere else. You may actually be running an anti-pimp campaign that sucks the pimpitude from anything or anyone nearby.

>> No.16007047


Shas'O is pretty much violence personified. He just doesn't sound like your average /tg/er. That's why I don't like him. He's different.

>> No.16007051
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>> No.16007056
File: 256 KB, 625x353, 1310006072695.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

My that guy is a kid. He's about 19-20 and started gaming with us when I recruited from a UNI gaming society.

Anyways, he makes these fucking stat blocks all the damn time. We play GURPS, and he discovered the character generator software. Thanks to him being in his first two years or so of gaming, ever, he's still fucking insane about making new 'builds' and 'characters' and 'heroes' and all sorts of other non-contiguous bullshit. Driving me insane with his need to play something new every time it strikes him fancy.

The thing that really bugs me? He doesn't even bring it up as any sort of logical exchange just "OOP, time to kill off my charachter!" and then he does some batshit insane out of character fucking crap.


>> No.16007066
File: 219 KB, 455x810, 1306793831385.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

We have a guy in our group that has vagina on the brain all the time. We're all in our 30s and 40s, so it's kind of weird. Every female NPC gets hit on, details of their figures are insisted upon, lechery lechery lechery 24/7.

At one point we ran across people in stasis containers on a ship in deep space, and his character ends up raping an unconscious teenage girl. Turns out the GM put them there as a trap in case he went too far, and his character ended up dying horrifically over it.

He's an otherwise decent guy and a fun player, but the persistent possibility of finding ourselves role-playing a rape scenario makes certain situations hard to deal with.

>> No.16007071


Let me clarify. I had no problem with fade to black, and we did a number of things involving crime lords, other pimps, and the women of the night.

But how would you feel when a 300 lb death star describes (quite badly) the doggy style, extra-physical foreplay, and body modification bondage, among other things?

When half my players complained, I needed to step in.

>> No.16007089
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my face when

>> No.16007093

rolled 10 = 10

have you tried actually explaining this to him?

>> No.16007105 [DELETED] 

Oh, this is just one of the many "That Guy"-esque things he does.
>Still playing same 4E campaign.
>EVERY TOWN we go to, he ALWAYS wants to create molotovs.
>One time my DM indulges him for shits and giggles and gives us all "Molotovs" (alchemist's fire)
>Turns out these help us immensely in a side quest by clearing rooms of minions at a time.
>mfw That Guy's stupid constant nagging about wanting molotovs actually helps us.

>> No.16007109
File: 114 KB, 600x500, clown puke rainbow.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>300 lb death star describes (quite badly) the doggy style, extra-physical foreplay, and body modification bondage

>> No.16007110


You are running Pimps in Space and you're surprised this happened? I'm not sure if you're regular stupid or some kind of savant level of stupid.

It's like you're the Goku of stupid, throwing Spirit Bombs of pure stupid all over the fucking place.

>> No.16007112
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Only half?

>> No.16007124
File: 77 KB, 500x413, 1308488586584.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Yes, but man, hes an over-sensitive kid. He's fun as shit, and he brings a lot of energy to the table, but if he tries to kill himself off again, just to play a fucking monkey with psychic powers or something, I may flip my OWN shit.

Anyone else ever found a mischievously intelligent way of dealing with a kid player who needs to mature? The blunt "you suck when you do this" isn't working and I'd rather not lose him to "go away until you can play with the big people".

>> No.16007130


Truth be told, I'd be creeped out too if I was there. Offhand mentions and "I bang the barmaid" are fine, but I don't want to know the details.

>> No.16007186


Out of five players, two actively disliked the situation. One silently disliked the situation (he didn't tell me until after). One did not care. And the fifth was the Rogue Trader.


Actually, yeah, this is how I handled things. I'm not there to know the details. I knew I was walking into potentially strange situations, but I said as long as you keep your fetishes in your head, it's okay to say, "I take a bunch in my room for a threesome" or "I enter into an 'endurance' match with the girls, one after another." Hell, that's what Arch-Militant and Seneschal did all the time. And nobody thought them creepy.

I hope that was a satisfactory explanation.

>> No.16007209

>Anyone else ever found a mischievously intelligent way of dealing with a kid player who needs to mature?

You make their choices have consequences. You reward consistent interaction with the story. You demonstrate the benefit that other characters have because they've been there the whole time. You DON'T integrate them seamlessly into the campaign story-arc.

>> No.16007210

I've been on 4chan for many years.
I've ashamedly spent time on /b/, glorying in the CP and gore threads - no more.
I frequent many of the boards here.
I'm a regular to /d/ and gurochan - I actively search the internet for something that can disgust me. At most, I have a sense of apathy for all things.
One of my jobs involves cleaning the literal shit out of peoples bins, and the nature of this results in me recieving a liberal spray of whatever. I have the taste of decomposing waste (in some cases human) always at the edge of my senses, and I don't care.

Whilst reading this thread I was making a bacon sandwich.

>His teeth were a mess of yellow, green and black.
>huge, grown man describing how he is punching a woman in detail, to the face of a girl who couldn't be older than 15.

I am no longer hungry.
This thing deserves my anger - I wish someone had punched his eyes out, but that'd require touching it.

>> No.16007212
File: 285 KB, 720x720, 1284609580701.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>Man, I'm sorry. I'm half-Native America half-Japanese. I got a history of getting fucked on one side and attempting to conquer and subjugate eastern Asia and the Pacific islands, with ample racism-based torture and rape forced on the people we captured for good measure, on the other. Sometimes I trip out a little at things like this.

The Japanese are bros now, but you're high if you think WWII era Japan qualifies for victim status in any way. Ask the Chinese or the Filipinos how 'persecuted' you were.

>> No.16007243
File: 2.02 MB, 1280x960, 1303054585106.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

MUST we get into an internet fight over this? Stick to gaming, not tearing down the explanations of someone who's English ain't too good.

>> No.16007246


I don't get it, how do you figure that he should be embarrassed because you decide to base your NPCs off of real people, that's no fault of his and he had no fucking way of knowing so why should it bother him? What he SHOULD be embarrassed over is beginning this whole graphic sex description bullshit.


>Implying getting a girl high is date-rape.

As long as she voluntarily ingests the intoxicants then she is legally responsible for all her actions, and that includes going to bed with some random fucker, you can't use the excuse that someone got you drunk and then asked to you to drive them home, you're still gonna get the ticket for drunk driving and he won't get anything other than a disapproving look from the police officer.

Unless he spiked her drink the consent counts.

>> No.16007254

>The Japanese are bros now
Really? The amount of "Remember Pearl Harbor" comments after the earthquake was disturbing.

>> No.16007259


Two of my ancestors were beheaded by the japanese because they were accused of helping civilians escape from torture squads. The day that Japan as a nation admits to what they did without making excuses is when they can start to be forgiven.

>> No.16007261

You really this bad at reading?

>> No.16007264

Tell him it's not fun for you/the other players, show him ways he can have new fun with old characters, and reward him in-game for sticking with a character (e.g. he recognises an NPC from earlier and gets advice from them that a new character wouldn't have).

Worst case scenario, create some penalty for new characters, like xp penalties in D&D. Maybe fewer points to build new characters.

>> No.16007265
File: 75 KB, 600x780, 1307935386307.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


1. Imagine she was your sister's character. Now try that explanation again. He used a guilt trip effectively leave him be.

2. Imagine she was your sister, high out of her gourd. Try your bullshit argument again.

>> No.16007271

Legally having sex with an intoxicated person is rape in the US

>> No.16007290
File: 58 KB, 282x282, 1276399261386.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I said the /Japanese/ are bros now. Republicans, on the other hand...

Anyway, revisionism refuted. I'm done. Continue the tales of mostly masochistic examples of allowing That Guy into one's life, then lamenting the inevitable results.

Seriously guys, nip this shit in the bud. For every misunderstood RPing wunderkind you'll turn away, you'll avoid 9 guys are every bit the asshole they seem to be at first contact.

>> No.16007293
File: 3 KB, 97x126, 1308108684027s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

MAn, I wish that kind of stuff would stick.
I know that removing bonuses is the same to his head as 'being punished unfairly'.
And I know that receiving bonuses from being long term would appear great...but he hasnt gotten to long term yet, ever.

It's a bad Catch-22 and I feel incredibly frustrated by it.

Maybe it's time for me to just clear cut my group again and start a new game without him. An extra complication? He live s out of town, and is a kid, so he can't drive or own a car. He's stuck getting rides donation only, and none of us live conveniently enough to get him to our group.

I may be tempted to just drop him like a sack of hammers.

>> No.16007294

if you're female sometimes it's true sometimes it's not. if you're male expect to be laughed out of court in just about every case.

>> No.16007297


Actually in many states and countries marijuana intoxication counts towards date rape just like alcohol.

>> No.16007302

I don't get it

>> No.16007308


That's the thing about the internet.
Sometimes people say mean and terrible things on it.
Like the people who use the internet to say that folk metal is good music, or that Lovecraft is a good writer, or that the holocaust never happened. People say these sorts of hideous racist lies all the time on the net, and it can be a little hard to tell when they are or are not trolling.

>> No.16007313


So I guess all the women who've ever had sex with a drunk guy should be prosecuted too?



She wasn't anyone's character, she was an NPC, and he still shouldn't have been embarrassed if she was based off of his sister, he still wouldn't have had any way to know.

My personal feeling about with who and when my sister should have sex has no bearing on the law you fucktard, nor should it have.

Try this: Imagine YOU a high of you gourd, and a girl has sex with you, would you drag her to court for rape? If you wouldn't then you are a sexist and a hypocrite and you should shut the fuck up.

>> No.16007317
File: 3 KB, 97x127, 1308102843072s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

He guilted the fucker into thinking he had offended the GM personally. The fat fuck should have social graces, but doesn't, so he pulled the innate "personally offended my friend" nerve in his guilt-consciousness.

>> No.16007319

"If you keep a character around for longer, you'll get the experience the group dynamic that the game is about."

or make him some super important destined to greatness guy so that when he kills him off, the entire quest falls apart and everybody hates him.

>> No.16007321

It's not strength but willingness that makes moral badness.

Everyone whose ancestors weren't willing to brutalize and slaughter foreigners has failed to arrive as a descendant in today's world.

It's bullshit to hold out a specific hatred for those who happened to be effectual enough to actualize their atrocities.

>> No.16007326

The game was Epic Level 3.5 set in Tales of Symphonia. This was about seven or eight sessions in, and the party consisted of Me, a Half-Elf Sublime Chord, a Human Warblade/Frenzied Berserker, an Elf Sorcerer/War Mage, a Halfling Spellthief, and a Human Favored Soul (Who happened to be That Guy's girlfriend and was vouching for him, no less), and a Wu Jen.

Anyway, we were making camp on the outskirts of a mountain range the Wu Jen's Cloud Chariot couldn't maneuver, and the party was told that what is basically the most racist gnome expy of Lucky the Leprechaun was walking down the road towards us.

We exchanged pleasantries and invited him to eat. Now, our games are usually VERY RP heavy, so we have plenty of times where we just interact IC with each other and the NPCs. He then proceeds to, again, maintaining the WORST IRISH ACCENT I HAVE EVER HEARD (I mean, I didn't know that it could be this bad, but this guy is from Birmingham), Hit on one of the NPCs (Raine Sage, if any of you have played) in an incredibly sexist fashion.

Now, My character just so happens to have been romancing her since the first session (DM said it was cool), so I kindly took out my Bow +5 with Quiver of Plenty and pointed at his face,

Continued in next post.

>> No.16007328

the character being based off someone real makes it hotter though

>> No.16007337


Rogue Trader was date raping and being creepy fetishistic about an NPC. Shas'o got sick of it. Based on what RT said, since it was just an NPC it was guilt-free and he could do whatever he wanted. When Shas'o revealed the NPC had grounds in reality, and hit close to home, it deeply disturbed the RT.

That's what I get out of it.

>> No.16007357

Sounds about right.

>> No.16007368

I do have a convention story but it's about the GM, not a player THAT GUY... Should I post it ?

>> No.16007373

>She wasn't anyone's character, she was an NPC, and he still shouldn't have been embarrassed if she was based off of his sister, he still wouldn't have had any way to know.

Yeah, but every time he thought of that NPC after that he'd be picturing his sister and he'd probably lose a lot of his motivation to describe what he's doing to her.

>> No.16007378

Sure bro.

>> No.16007391
File: 97 KB, 800x561, 800px-1204274003601.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Need to vent
Playing some 40K with a few /b/ros at FLGS, 2 vs 2 match.
Me playing Black Templars and mate playing IG (tanks everywhere). /b/ro across the other side playing Orks and THAT FUCKING GUY playing GK (Bandwagoner, he switched from Space Pups to BA to GK) tries to cheat by adding +1 to wounds, strength you name it he'll try it, hates losing, can't talk to anyone just shouts at them.
Up and left when my Sword Bretheren Terminators took out 2 squads of his terminators.

>> No.16007411



>Yeah, but every time he thought of that NPC after that he'd be picturing his sister and he'd probably lose a lot of his motivation to describe what he's doing to her.

I wouldn't be too sure, THAT GUYS tend to be into that sort of stuff.

But sure, it makes sense that he'd stop doing it after that, but what I don't get is how people in his thread apparently perceive what Shas'o pulled as a "guilt trip" when he should feel guilty about something he could POSSIBLY have known.

>> No.16007412

The DM was one of the players from our previous group, insisted on us starting in a tavern(when we wasted nearly 2 hours in one in the previous game...), and started doing zero prep work from the second session onwards (taking more than an hour to narrate a "NPC obtains macguffin" scene, that was a dead give away). Decided he wanted us to do a mystery style campaign where we investigate a group of suspicious masked guys.

We questioned the townspeople, and got basically no useful info. When we raised the issue of not having much to go on, he blamed us for not calling for gather information rolls.

He then decided to make the masked men a group of high level VIP spellcasters when we were level 4 and took to making constant "oh man you guys are so going to die" comments everytime we discussed plans. He even deliberately staged an encounter where one of the masked men strode into the tavern where we were questioning the locals, threw the naked bodies of two of our seperated group members onto the floor and left, proceeded to go "The masked man refuses to respond and turns to leave" when we attempted to question him, and acted dissapointed when we didnt use force to try and stop him.

This was about when i started suspecting the whole campaign was an elaborate troll, especially when i pretty much upfront asked him if he was trying to railroad us into a certain course of action(since nobody had any clue what we were supposed to do and it was obvious we were not having fun) and he started blaming us for the campaign not progressing.

>> No.16007415

If you can't demonstrate that long-term characters pay off, explain that they do. Or imply that they do by having his new characters meet NPCs he recognises but his character doesn't, and by giving similar benefits to other players.

If another player takes a hit to points in character creation first (or pretends to), or if you announce that policy, it can be a warning without actually being a punishment (yet).

I certainly suggest you do that before just dropping him from the group: that way you'll have given him a chance to improve and to not misinterpret the policy as unfair.

I hate sexist laws :(

It's still good for modern societies to admit flaws in the past. It shows that they're not arrogantly always right and are open to improvement. I believe Japan has apologised for war crimes in China many times, though.

>> No.16007454

>>16007415 I believe Japan has apologised for war crimes in China many times, though.
I don't think it has apologized "many times". And the first apology (and only one I know of) didn't come until 1995.

>> No.16007456

So some friends and I were playing some 3.5 and we were quickly learning that one of our fellow players was turning into That Guy.

At the time we were entered into a contest in which the winner gains the mayor's daughter's hand in marriage. The contestants were the the party and a few NPCs to add more competition.

Earlier in the day That Guy, the Paladin, dueled an NPC aristocrat as part of the contest. The rules of the contest prohibited lethal damage but the Paladin switched to lethal anyway after failing to hit the aristocrat with his -4 penalty. He still lost, failing to hit the aristocrat once.

The Paladin began to hate the aristocrat for this. That night, at dinner the Paladin hurled a throwing axe into the aristocrat's back. He hit and grievously wounded him. He was quickly arrested and scheduled to be hanged.

The Guy playing the paladin then began to argue with the DM over this. He felt he shouldn't be punished for his actions. His reason?

"I was roleplaying!"

Apparently he was playing a Paladin with anger issues, which had yet to become apparent in the campaign. After a long argument the DM finally got the Paladin to shut up and accept his fate.

His character was hanged and he was never invited back.

>> No.16007511

Legally speaking, simply being intoxicated doesn't make it rape; however, if you can show that you were intoxicated to the point that you could not give consent then it is rape.
For example: http://masslawlib.blogspot.com/2008/02/rape-intoxication-and-consent.html

Most people are embarrassed when they realize they've done something socially awkward like describing having sex with an acquaintance's friend, whether they knew beforehand or not. If you don't feel this way you're an exception.

>> No.16007518

the law, like most rape laws, isn't sexist and actually makes sense. see >>16007511
it's the enforcement that is sexist.

>> No.16007554

So, convention, not that big or anything but pretty nice all around. Several games to chose from and I opted for the Vampire one, renaissance era. Things started out pretty good actually. We each had chars with a bit of backstory, things went rather smoothly, a nice balance of combat and story... Overall, without the ending, it could have been pleasant too.

However, after some strolling around the Loch Ness, we found that the guy someone sent us to rescue was captured by a cult or something...We went to the place, slept hiding in piles of corpses, and woke up to see the guy bound and captured. The cultists are overnumbering us, but we still decide to go with shock and awe, jumping on them, freeing the guy, and then going for a daring escape. That DMPC got -I don't remember how- his hands over his katana, and basically slashed half of the baddies while the party's united efforts did the other half.

One part i forgot to mention was that my character's backstory involved that I kinda banged some chick who was married with some guy. This guy being the rescued guy of course.

>> No.16007570


So, as we escaped, the dmpc went on with basically doing everything he could to "accidentaly" kill me, up to and including using me as a shield against gatling fire. Also: dynamite.

Now, that simple fact didn't seemed too bad, even though my char wasn't really bragging about the fact he had the biggest dick. But okay, the rescued vampire is an old angry geezer, alright alright. What really ticked me off was the end of it.

The DM, after we were done with what we had to do, proceeded to tell us that we did it. That everyone did fine afterwards, except my char who died soon after to political manipulation. And then, he went on for almost half an hour, describing that the guy we rescued was actually his character as a player in a long campaign that started in dark age, and basically read us a seven page backstory...

I couldn't shake the feeling that my char wasn't made as I initially thought to be a punch-throwing, dignified-looking badass, but as a way to conclude some story elements that didn't fit the ideal vision of his special globe-trotting snowflake.

Sorry if that was a bit confused.

>> No.16007575

Yes it has, and the first official apology to China was in the 70s.

>I hate sexist laws :(
The law is not sexist, it's an issue of the judges and police deciding who they believe when evidence is given. Most people simply don't take male rape claims seriously, the law itself has nothing to do with it. That said, rape cases are slanted in favor of the defendant whether you're male or female simply because of the difficulty of procuring evidence.

>> No.16007595

I know I'm pretty late to this thread, but having read most of it, I just feel like saying this:

Holy shit, you're a a gigantic faggot, I'd rather associate with TG from the OP than with you.

Or it this just some troll that I fell for?

>> No.16007606


Men have the intelligence and emotional sophistication of a stone. No one should be concerned if they get raped.

>> No.16007617


Falling for the troll, but I disagree.

>> No.16007651
File: 123 KB, 723x723, 1304781067298.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]



I'll give you a single point for trying, but you can do much better than that.

>> No.16007670

Wikipedia lists several (as >>16007575 says), plus reparations paid to occupied countries. There doesn't seem to be a big thing about it, though, unlike in Germany, where they go to fascist lengths to avoid looking fascist. Hard to say which is better.

True, in this case. I'm sure there will also be many equivalent laws that are sexist, though. And the sexist enforcement is still a problem.

Yeah, I suspect it is mainly the enforcement, but I think (though I don't have examples) that the law can actually be biased too. I also suspect the bias in judgements outweighs the advantage of being defendant, though again that's just a suspicion.

>> No.16007679
File: 26 KB, 300x300, 1313776887655.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Going to have to agree with >>16007651
If you keep this up good sir you will not even place, much less make the championships.

>> No.16007700

>Falling for the troll, but I disagree.

There are men who do have that but I'd hardly call them men. They're more like honorary women. Lesser ones of course because they can't actually know the mysteries of womenhood. It's the best their sex can hope for in the world we live in.

>> No.16007717


You still get 1/10.

>being closer to women
>can't know the womenhood


>> No.16007723
File: 1.19 MB, 1440x2017, HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

this springs to mind

>> No.16007728

>Guy says he wants to make the party face
>No problem right? Just roll a rogue with high int or something...
>He wants to make the party face that is useless in combat, convinces DM to let him use some custom class, something like low bab, no weapon proficiencies, etc
>Okay, no problem, at least he will be awesome in social situations and his backstory seems interesting...
>First social situation, party needs to gather info, expect party face guy to take the lead
>"My character chooses to spend the entire time flirting with the barmaid."
>"Yea i changed my mind, in the end i wanted to make a character that was as useless as possible. Btw shes also a lesbian."

>> No.16007733

what happened to this thread?

>> No.16007735

Yes because killing minorities is such a good act.

>> No.16007738


There we go! Phrases like "the mysteries of womenhood" are perfect for trolling because they sound like something a real feminazi might use.

But there's still room for improvement! I stead of "Women" you should have used "womyn" you know, that bullshit term that feminists use to be independent.

over all i'll give this new post a 3/10, mostly for the potential you show, keep this up and you might be a real troll one day.

>> No.16007744

idiots and That Guys derailing the thread about That Guy

>> No.16007747


>Hurp durp the Japanese are a minority in Japan

No you fucking retard.

>> No.16007763

only examples of bias rape laws I can recall we're (they were overturned) hetreonormative, not sexist.

Basically, the age of consent for hetero sex was 15, but sodomy (at it was called that in the law) required 18 years to consent.

As much as the non-enforcement of male rape cases is an issue, concluding that many rape laws are bias against laws in unjustified.

>> No.16007765
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>> No.16007766

They are a minority on planet earth.

>> No.16007782


Women are more in touch with each other and the world around them. Men are grotesque outsiders who grunt and snort. Men are about as close to Ogres as you can get in the real world. Beating a grunting man is like slaying a troll and every victory over them should be celebrated.

>> No.16007792

Okay, this one made me laugh. Well done.

>> No.16007797

either be subtle enough to fool, or horrible enough to enrage anyways. This is just boring.

>> No.16007799


That's not how things work you spastic.

So are American, and so are EVERY group on earth.

>> No.16007800

In Scotland it's only rape when it's a man assaulting a woman. Any other case is merely sexual assault.

>> No.16007803

No they're not you fucking mongoloid. If you'd EVER even bothered to read any studies anywhere ever you'd know that Asians are a huge proportion of the world. Hell, according to Nat Geo the average man is a Chinese man making less than 20k

>> No.16007804


Oh come now Simon, i thought it was at least pretty well thought out and cleverly related to the board it was posted on.

It at least deserves a 2/10

>> No.16007809


Speaking as a man, I am indeed an outsider. From hell. I'll rape you, and all women everywhere because that's what men do. And while you cry, I'll laugh.

Because I'm the man.

>> No.16007812

It is a pleasure to tell you you are wrong, or in the process of being so. Check out the Sexual Offences (Scotland) Act 2009, a long overdue reform.

>> No.16007818

Everyone is a minority on planet Earth.
>implying anyone is falling for it

>> No.16007822

Not quite true. It has to be a penis, the victim can be male or female.

>> No.16007838


The best part is that I'm telling you these things about yourself and you have to sit and take it like you should be doing. Men are the useless half of the human race except for a few good ones who know their place.

>> No.16007843

>When he's talking about japanese

>> No.16007845

Humanity is a minority, we're outnumbered by the insects oh noes

>> No.16007847


If I remember correctly, in the state of Florida rape is when you forcibly penetrate someone without their consent.
So a woman can only rape a man with a strapon or her fist or something like that, not her genitals.

>> No.16007848

a really quick, if a bit frustrating to the player, fix would be to have each new character start at level 1.

>> No.16007853


I'm a woman. Stop trying, your failed attempt is not even working. I'm done answering to angsty teenager that got laughed at and can't get out of a friendzone.

>> No.16007866

Note that Sexual Assault by Penetration follows the same conventions for penalty as the s1 offence of Rape, too.

>> No.16007874

we already know you aren't a woman. If you were this much of a anti social feminazi, you'd never get into traditional games and you'd only get on 4chan to complain to the /b/tards, so you wouldn't be here

0/10 troll

>> No.16007880




This is the true nature of men. Would the world be a worse place if this person were not here? Would it be worse if they all weren't here?

>> No.16007883

That's basically the same as saying he can't play.

>> No.16007897


Kindly move along, this is not the thread topic.

Roll on That Guy thread.

>> No.16007907

>Starting out with a new party. Three of the five are new to D&D but very eagre to learn. DM has played before but this is his first time running.
>Short, simple campaign; very easymode to get everyone used to the rules and setting
>To get a bit of bearing and help our nooby DM keep track of things, we draft in one of his friends who is a very experienced D&Der
>First thing this guy does is roll CoDzilla
>Proceeds to steamroll every encounter and solo the boss monster
>New guys all stop coming to sessions because they have fuck all to do and feel completely superfluous
>DM has confidence crisis but doesn't want to alienate his friend by telling him to fuck off

That. Fucking. Guy.

>> No.16007910

>Threat about that guy
>People argue about japanese and women
What the fuck.

>> No.16007915


What's a CoDzilla? Serious question.

>> No.16007918


Your breasts and vagina render you unworthy to talk about me, woman

>> No.16007919


Deep down almost all men are That Guy except for a few that speak when spoken to instead of hooting and grunting like loud apes.

>> No.16007923

Cleric of Doom zilla
Seriously. They have amazing basic vanilla builds that could rape alot of shit, given the leeway an inexperienced GM can allow.

Thats the main reason I play GURPS< not DnD. Rules suck.

>> No.16007931

Cleric or Druid buffs themselves, become better fighters than the fighters, and with healing, spells, and utility on top of that.

>> No.16007937


Yeah....that one has always struk me as the dumbest thign they could do.

She gets a MASSIVE ROLL, telling the people all around them what monsters men are?

And then they prove her point, killing her in the middle of peaceful talks.

Sure. Those two would be put to death, and the one raised.

>> No.16007952


Any thoughts of power-gaming were thwarted on my table. We used DnD rules, but those that were fun, not all of them. We enjoyed the world and setting. Mechanics were secondary still leaving fun customization and development.

That's how I used to roll. Then everyone switched to wow-mode. Never been the same. Went back to ye old Warhammer.

I miss the days.

>> No.16007956

I see.

>concluding that many rape laws are bias against laws in unjustified
I did not conclude that from the biased enforcement; I speculated at it because of similarly biased laws in other fields.

>> No.16007961


Cleric and/or Druid-zilla

They completely break any 3.5 game and make most other classes obsolete in comparison. If the party has one of these then you might as well rock-of-doom any monks, fighters and warlocks because they'll never get to roll a dice in anger again.

>> No.16007991

>in the end i wanted to make a character that was as useless as possible. Btw shes also a lesbian.
Please say this is just paraphrasing and not literally what he said.

>> No.16008007

killing blow was by a women. Therefore disproving her point.

Reactions was totally justified and appropriate, and the GM was right to just make the bard deal with it. Piss off the rest of your party bad enough for them to straight up murder you, then pay the price

>> No.16008022

I have a story
>My bro is DMing a 3.5 game
>Me and that guy are playing
>That guy is a short, creepy kid
>I'm a cleric
>His character is a carbon copy of Kite from .hack right down to the character portrait
>Bro DM looks at his sheet and notices that his character has the twilight bracelet
>DM says he can't have it for obvious reasons
>That guys throws a bitch fit, and complies in the end
>Me and bro DM smirk at each other
>Game starts
>That guy's character gets raped by orcs

>> No.16008048

>It smelled as if a Big Mac just died in front of me.
I lol'd at this.
>"I don't like working together with other players."
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA.... *points the other direction* Bye.

>> No.16008066

Wow, that's dick move.

>> No.16008087

>that guy throws a fit
>Ruin game for him in response

Grats, you proved that you're as bad as him, if not worse.

>> No.16008105

Am i the only one who thinks OP made up his story?

Just a little bit?

>> No.16008107


>He's an otherwise decent guy and a fun player,
Somehow, I doubt that. How well do you actually know him?

>> No.16008118

I wish man. That 15 year old girl was the store owner Daughter that he asked me to introduce her to this game, since she into super heroes. I just tried to skip over the other players and focus on the negative experience I have, it helped me to exorcise the guy from my mind if that makes any sense.

>> No.16008120


That's not how you deal with players.

That's how you behave like complete assholes.

>> No.16008129


Bullshit. That's a FUCKING massive roll. So one woman went against it? Clearly she's insane. Put her down with the dogs. You attack in a place of peice, like that? Yeah, don't matter how right you are, your ass is gone.

>> No.16008151
File: 115 KB, 800x572, a5t0pqpx.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

What the fuck is up with roleplayers and rape.

>> No.16008165

You really need it spelled out for you?

Roleplay is about doing things you can't actually do.

>> No.16008208


of course it's made up. it's a basic troll by the op and nothing more. welcome to /tg/ where they talk about 'that guy' in the same way ancient sailors told stories about sea creatures that lurk at the edge of the world.

just accept that you're reading the tales of some failed broken person and move on so he can have his minute in the trolling spotlight.

>> No.16008209

> You attack in a place of peice
> place of peice
> peice

An all woman council? I guess that's a place of piece.

>> No.16008215

One massive roll does not convince a people to kill an entire gender, many of whom would be loved ones

if you think it should, YOU are what is wrong with DnD

>> No.16008332

No Researcher Sam stories? Did he die or something?

>> No.16008345

Hmmm, my that guy isnt too bad. He's shy and can easily be talked down in ANY situation.

The problem is that he has the social skills of a 12 year old. Always have to talk about things relevant to his interests. When you're talking he will find any reason to ram in his own thoughts.

You know how you listen to what other people say even if its not really your stance/interest, mainly out of common fucking decency and seeing if what they say is any interesting? He is COMPLETELY unable to do this.

He's also a really lousy RPer, relying on gimmicks and shallow personalities, switches characters all the fucking time. He's also most obsessed with gaming, and will go apeshit if we don't game a week. He would literally have no friends if we ended our games.

And yes, we have tried making him better. For about 5 years. Im convinced it's going worse, now he has a tendency to miss entire lines in conversations he's part of.

For example, DM explains encounter, he then asks literally a minute later what the encounter we're in is about.


>> No.16008349

A That Guy thread? Alright! Storyti-
I miss the good times, /tg/ Where did they go?

>> No.16008351

You should have a word with several spells and skills from multiple editions.

>> No.16008384
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>this thread
so...it sounds like role playing any kind of sexuality is off limits and you can't have any kind of reference to romance or sex at all, ever? Or you're a loser?

>> No.16008397

Why would you? It would just make other people uncomfortable.

I'm sure light romance is ok, "prince saving princess" etc.

But leave the masturbation fantasies for personal time

>> No.16008454

Man, I enjoy rape-play with a fuckbuddy now and then, what I don't do is bring that shit to the table where I'm having an adventure with a bunch of friends.

>> No.16008484


I've played a few games where some romance and sexual stuff happened between characters, but that was because it made sense in the context of the game, and actually made for some awesome RP sessions.

It shouldn't be off limits...but when someones personal sexual fantasy comes into it, thats when it becomes creepy.

But, fair disclosure, I don't include alot of sexuality in my characters...nothing much more than "He/she goes off and finds a friendly bed for the night, before joining up with the party in the morning" kind of thing.

But thats just me.

>> No.16008530
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Been in a Homebrew Fantasy setting, and a Rogue Trader game with a group that ERP's and sprung up from erotic roleplay.

They are the least creepy group I have every played with, and the most well adjusted. Sex happens behind closed doors and if it comes up within a session is it like how it would be referenced in a noir or Conan the Barbarian type comic.

>> No.16008568

>prince saving princess
>not masturbation fantasy

nigga what

>> No.16008573


>Researcher Sam

>Has a virgin character, she gets aroused and starts fisting herself in the vagina

>Also has a farting fetish

>> No.16008583

>Sex happens behind closed doors and if it comes up within a session is it like how it would be referenced in a noir or Conan the Barbarian type comic.

So a player just addresses the fourth wall and goes
"I have to say I've never been a subtle person, never works in the lowest rungs of the world. This time, however, I didn't find any objection to taking the back door"

>> No.16008693

Can you put that in a way that makes sense?

>> No.16008701

someone MUST tell me what Pimps in Space is.

>> No.16008717

Someone MUST explain to me what Pimps in Space is.

>> No.16008722

He shoved his penis into a lady's anus. In-character, of course.

>> No.16008734
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>> No.16008742

He's saying his character just stuck it in her pooper.

>> No.16008786

Sex is just glossed over, and then played out during non-session time. On the internet of course.

>> No.16008894


A while ago Shas'o ran a Rogue Trader game that had the players be pimps and crime lords that ran around the galaxy mucking about. The Rogue Trader was That Guy, and everyone hates him.

>> No.16008907 [DELETED] 
File: 5 KB, 126x95, atcomputer.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>mfw this thread

>> No.16008936


You know, after reading the stories on /rs/ and sorting through the whining of the rogue trader, they actually did make decent pimps. They just did a lot more of the business aspect than the hedonistic aspect.

>> No.16008989


Well, by definition a pimp gets his stable to the client. That's the most important thing - making money. It's the ones that run around all flash and fucking their own girls that everyone knows.

>> No.16009044


It's gone places.

>> No.16009079

Cleric or Druid build that capitalizes on a number of classes and the inherent strength of the caster classes in 3.5 to become gods of combat.

>> No.16009396

So, is this still a That Guy Thread, or have we moved on to pimps, feminism, rape, and other things?

>> No.16009406

Rule number one is that you don't fuck your prostitutes

>> No.16009455


A pimp should NEVER fuck his own girls, or at least limit himself to one or two.

>> No.16009535

I think it died with but hurt. Post a That Guy story and maybe you can do some bullshit saving roll or something.

>> No.16009814

Or if you have a REALLY friendly IRL group.

>> No.16010279

I've got a THAT GUY who's really not all that terrible, just a little too insufferable

We'll call him Jerry.

Jerry is a big guy, I'm a big guy myself, 6'2, 240 lbs. Jerry is bigger, while still being lighter than me, where I wear a size 48, Jerry's waist is probably in the mid-50's range.

The Problem isn't his weight or size, it's how he dresses. Raggedy jeans, grungy unlaced steel toed workbooks, ratter old graphic tee shirt, smoking jacket, even in the dead of summer, and beaver skin tophat. He'll also go around chomping on a cheap tobacco pipe he has no idea how o actually pipe properly, so he goes through an entire pack of matches relighting the thing.

Jerry thinks he looks awesome. Jerry also thinks that everyone loves him because he's the white elephant in the room. He vies for the center of attention, plays the one-upmanship game and likes to brag how he's the greatest thing ever because he's so "Charismatic."

>> No.16010285

Jerry thinks of himself as a renaissance man and a dapper old fashioned guy. He likes to believe that he's well versed in the classics, fine culture and that women are genuinely impressed by him singing mack the knife on karaoke night. In reality Jerry barely understand Shakespeare, is convinced that Jack Daniels is the greatest drink ever and is the only alcohol worth imbibing (after diluting it to cola), and while his Mack the Knife rendition is impressive, it doesn't mask what he is. An overconfident nerd who's awkwardness and bad taste weird out those around him who are not immune to his overbearing and insufferable personality.

In game he's the power gaming dice fudger, who speaks the loudest, bullies the other players and constantly vies for the position of being "the best".

His redeeming trait is that he is not a munchkin despite his power gaming tendencies and doesn't really realize how bad he is. He's been told off a few times and he doesn't really believe their claims that he can get really annoying. Otherwise he's not bad, just really annoying at times.

>> No.16010402

I know that gay. I fucking hate that guy.

>> No.16010416
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>> No.16010464

i've run into this kind of person many times. i swear, theres only 100 people in the world, then it just starts repeating

>> No.16010539

There are many Jerrys.

They're spread all across the world, there to tell us about their favorite drow characters that abuse posion rules, how fun it is to be evil in game and why misogyny and racism is a funny and endearing character trait.

>> No.16010555

>I have a problem with characters that believe things that I disagree with
Aren't you a gem.

>> No.16010576

Non-politically correct jokes are among the funniest jokes I've ever heard. If you don't have the stomach for something that is so blatantly offensive that the person telling it can't possibly mean it (see: Aristocrats, The) then you can't possibly be fun to be around.

>> No.16010585

My that guy we booted from the group twice. First time he stormed off in a hissy fit after his mini-max special boy fighter bit the dirt falling for a very plain illusion. We let him come back because technically, he left, we did not really ban him. He threw the fit over imagination games. Second time was more final. Here is a list of things he has done.

Magically rolled all 18's on a character at home. Then professed he did it on his own. Made a fighter/rogue that was "chaotic good" but murdered a ship captain, caused a mutiny, set fire to the boat after it dropped him off, and then proceeded to kill a man for his house. Afterwards, he bullied the DM into making the authorities not care..

our party, all natives to the land he was visiting, wanted nothing to do with this loonatic savage from across the pond, which made him angry. He did stupid shit to get himself in situations he could not get out of, then raged at us when we did not come charging in to bail him out. We are asked to deal with bandits, find out they are just starving farmers unable to pay the taxes in the area, and we decide to leave them be and not take the bounty on them. Special man, however, decides to get himself captured and taken to camp. He is tied up, expecting us to rush in and save him...we did not. we went on to town. After informing him several times "no, we are not doing that, do not do that" he went ahead.

>> No.16010625 [DELETED] 

There is a time and place for inappropriate humor. Jerries don't understand this. Jerries will barrage you with unfunny sexist comments left and right at the expense of another player and use the "in good humor" excuse to give the other player a hard time for playing an elf or woman. Jerries will make nigger jokes and around people who are uncomfortable or offended by them. Jerries lack the tact and social conscience to effectively control his mouth and will loudly declare "kill that nigger" in the middle of the table at the gaming store.

>> No.16010642


He quits, and comes back later to DM. We allow it, willing to give everyone a second chance. Well first game, he reads out this 3 page thing about his world he created. Good we all think, he put thought into this! No...turns out it was just some bullshit stolen from World of Warcraft. We are put into the first town, lead to a festival, and instantly put on rails right after. The village is sacked and destroyed while we are down in the most linear dungeon ever witnessed. it was all one big tunnel. We emerge right in the center of town, just in time to be framed for the attack on a village of 500+ people...all 5 of us...level 2's. Somehow, someway, the authorities believe that 5 humans, no matter how powerful, are capable of fighting an entire village and garrison of soldiers by ourselves.

Several sessions in, he introduces his self insert. An orc he later admited was "his WoW character" which had super speed, super strength, could leap over trees and do all sorts of wonky stupid shit that made our entire party look pointless. Everywhere we went, even when we stated we had sneaked off without super orc knowing, there he was. Charging in to save the day! We kill 10 evil bandits, he has killed the other 100. We fight a dragon, he comes bursting into the room at the last second to get the final shot in, being described in glorious detail how he did not even break a sweat beheading the thing in one fell swoop.

We start to plot the death of the DMPC, and eventually decide the best method is to lure him into a fight with the big bad (A second self insert, which was just amazingly great at destroying everything we loved) and walk the fuck away. Let his ego beat up his ID we thought! Wrong. turns out super orc became amazingly apathetic when it came to fighting super big bad. "I don't care, whatever..." was all that he would say.

the game ended shortly after we professed we was sick of his shit, and kicked him out.

>> No.16010665


He has been messaging me lately on MSN, hinting he is bored and lonely and has no friends and wants to rejoin the group. Constantly shit like "hey im about to start a game, I got a group, its awesome" and shit like this. his most recent message got zero response from me, it was..

"hey I am making a character, I want something super broken to play, I mean like, way over powered...got any suggestions?"

No, but if you are reading this here is a suggestion. STOP BEING THAT GUY AND STOP BEING A STUPID FUCKER. Play normal shit and not a perfect fucking character!

>> No.16010686

Then you must....13? 14 years old? Maybe 15?

>> No.16010710

If you can't appreciate a good impromptu Aristocrats joke at a get-together then you're a stick in the mud. It tests not only the improvisational skills but the very steeled will of the teller and those around him. To reach the punchline is a merit of creativity, and for those around you nightmare fuel for at least the following night.

>> No.16010734

I have no idea what you're talking about, but you obviously seem to lack emotional maturity or common sense to realize that lewd jokes are not the apex of human standards.

>> No.16010735 [DELETED] 

Are you trying to imply "women" or "nigger" jokers are clever and that making a punch line for them is in the least be difficult? You just say "Cause he was a NIGGER" and all the little faggots like you laugh. You're the one that's boring, in actuality. I cannot stand those kinds of faggots being around me, interrupting conversation to scream "MAKE A ME A SAMMICH, BITCH" or "CAUSE HE WAS A NIGGER"

>> No.16010741


PROTIP: Humor is built on suffering. If you can't acknowledge that, that's your problem.

Telling jokes intended to be offensive is different from telling dirty jokes.

>> No.16010776

You can grandstand all you want, but inappropriate behavior is inappropriate regardless of whether YOU think it's funny or not.

And offensive jokes are inappropriate behavior.

Also humor is built on circumstance, not suffering.

>> No.16010781
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Guys. That Guy showed up.

>> No.16010793

Those aren't my kind of jokes. I prefer shaggy dog stories that may or may not have some undertone, either sexist or otherwise, that some folks may or may not pick up on. Its all in good fun, the jokes are more about the process of reaching the punchline than the punchline itself. Vulgarity is merely a tool, it doesn't mean the person telling it is himself vulgar, or racist, or sexist. Its dirty, but its a journey that everyone takes to reach the end of the joke. I don't tell it to people I've just met, I warm them up to it, at any rate. They know its not the punchline, which is never merely "because the bitch had it coming" or "because he was a black guy" I usually wrap it up with some horrible pun.

For instance, I told an aristocrats joke that involved white slavery and a dirigible race and ended with the son of the father impaling himself, ass first, on the Empire State Building.

Its all about story telling. They're lewd, they're immature at times, sure, but the clean ones are never as fun.

>> No.16010801

The game is a lil broken without Deathward and Freedom of Movement, so its better to view it as the fighters and warlocks are abnormally shitty rather than as the *classes you need to play the game* as being abnormal.

>> No.16010822 [DELETED] 

>I told an aristocrats joke that involved white slavery and a dirigible race and ended with the son of the father impaling himself, ass first, on the Empire State Building.

See, this works. Taking refuge in absurdity is the right way to manage dirty jokes. Going "LOLOL NIGGERS AND BITCHES HAHAHAHA" is not.

>> No.16010826

Thing is nobody gives a shit about what you think is funny. In fact you're exhibiting the kind of behavior that "Jerry" exhibits. You're insisting your favorite jokes are the best, but really your immature behavior and inability to grasp the point show how much of a THAT GUY you are.

Also what the fuck is an aristocrat joke?

>> No.16010872

I never said my jokes are the best. Humor is very relative, I said they were the funniest to myself. I think they're funny because of how absurd they are.

An Aristocrats joke is... a slate, a template that people start with. The joke's premise is that a family goes to a talent agent asking to be hired. The talent agent seems unsure to hire them since family acts don't sell well any more, to which then the family shows him their act to disprove that they won't sell. From there, the teller improvises a story that involves incest, necrophilia, bestiality, and anything and everything else in between into the land of absurdity for the rest of the joke.

When their act is done the talent agent is to stand, or sit there, bewildered, and asks what they call themselves; to which they respond "The Aristocrats!" That's the punchline, the end of the joke.

Its a force of will for both the teller and the audience, and despite its vulgarity - if done right, is pretty damn funny if the person can tell a good story.

>> No.16010877

You know how "Jerry" smokes a pipe and wears a fedora to look like he "knows shit"? Same principal.

That is THAT GUY.

>> No.16010883

ITT: we hate social retards, but also anyone with too much individuality

>> No.16010908 [DELETED] 

Don't tell me you're talking about that guy who thinks nigger jokes are funny.

>> No.16010909

no its not.

if you'd stop being a neckbeard, you'd know that guys like that can be bros if you're willing to overlook their pretentiousness.

THAT GUY cannot be "gotten along with"

>> No.16010928 [DELETED] 

yeah man. I think someone has to do something a lot worse than a nigger joke for me to label him THAT GUY.

>> No.16010968

I don't think we're thinking about the same That Guy.

>> No.16010978

I'm not perfect, I like vulgar jokes. That said, its really about as far as I go into being "socially retarded" as you put it. I'm not politically insensitive, but I do think overly politically correct folks are silly. I'd like to think I'm also tactful about some of the jokes, I tell it in comfortable company and see how far along I can go before somebody leaves or asks me to stop, which then I will. I always ask first, and if things get quiet I always say "So a guy walks into a talent agent's office" which helps liven up conversation some.

We may not like each other, but I'm not entirely irredeemable as a human being. I am a good role player, and I hate meta-gamers and power-gamers.

>> No.16010996

I'm talking about both of them.

tasteless jokes or being a hipster doesn't make it impossible or even necessarily difficult to play with a person.

>> No.16011012

its not very courteous to go until someone leaves or asks you to stop.
you should at least watch facial expressions and stop when you see a wince, if not sooner.

>> No.16011017

Your argument is to pick out and defend one thing, that you find jokes that are of poor taste to be funny.

Lots of people find them funny, and it's not a question of whether or not they are or are not. It's an issue of using them in a situation where they can be taken in good humor.

Acting like a Misogynist prick at the gaming table when it makes other people feel unwelcome or uncomfortable is bad behavior and you'll be hard pressed to convince them otherwise because it's a sign of immaturity and stupidity. People have standards, and just because yours are lax, does not mean that they can't just take a joke. You're taking it too far. They're tacky and uncalled for in most social situations. And the humor in them is in the timing when social standards can be thrown out the window.

And that's your issue right there, you're so hard pressed to defend your tastelessness as good humor that you can't see how pretentious and insufferable your behavior is.

>> No.16011030

Dirty jokes aren't about being courteous, its pushing the limits of yourself and the audience. Its the experience, that's what I'm trying to get you to understand.

Its also an in-joke of the entertainment industry, at least amongst comedians. I saw a documentary about it, which got me and some friends telling the jokes to each other. We've really hammered some out, let me tell you.

They're also easier to tell whilst being (slightly) inebriated. Ehue!

>> No.16011052
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So the joke...is to be as "14-years-old" as possible, for as long as possible? And that's funny?

I'm afraid I do not understand this concept.

>> No.16011055

I don't meta-game. I am not my character, my character is different from myself. Out of character I try not to act like a douche, I'm not holier than thou, and I hate it when people berate others and I call people out on their bullshit. When a game is in session I focus on the game. I tell my jokes at social gatherings when the company is right. I don't act vulgar to strangers and I only do it to weak stomached folks just to get them steamed up, quite like how you are. I try not to be a that guy, but some people's buttons are just too easy to press sometimes.

>> No.16011069

Hearken back to my previous statement about humor being very relative.

I know its not for everyone, to each their own; out of the mouth of babes and all that.

>> No.16011072

It seems to me a lot of the confusion is coming from WHY we think "non-politically correct" jokes are unfunny. It seems a lot of people think it's cause they're offensive.

They're not. They're just fucking stupid. Like a Chuck Norris joke. That's how annoying you sound to me.

>> No.16011075


nothing about the fact that you're sharing a dirty joke stops you from being courteous to the audience.
if your joke offends the audience rather then entertaining them, what was the point of telling it?

so the only question is, are you going to stop as soon as you realize you've crossed lines with someone, or are you going to recklessly press on until they don't want to be around you anymore?

^that question is the measure of how much of a social retard you are.

>> No.16011097

Not samefag, but let me point out two things.

1. You're complaining about adults acting like children on what is not only an anonymous imageboard, but is an anonymous imageboard dedicated to playing pretend.
2. Basically, the Aristocrats is only funny when you're in one of those odd moods. You know the moods where everything is funny? But when you're in that mood, it's funnier than anything else. The idea is to be completely horrifying and revolting, and maybe slip in a few silly small jokes in the middle. You have your audience on the edge of their seats, trying to figure out what the fuck you're going to say next. And you end with the same punchline, which is to remind you, "hey... you're listening to a joke. Why you so eager to hear fucked up stuff, you sick fuck?" and if done right is hilarious. I've heard the joke actually be funny two or three times ever, and heard it told at least 15. The person telling the joke has to be funny in general.

>> No.16011112

What about jokes like this:

A black man is hit by a car and goes through the windshield. He's then arrested for breaking and entering.

Funny? No? It's not actually racist.

>> No.16011123

I'll try one of my jokes for a second. This man, a father of two and husband of a lovely wife, was working late to finish one of his projects for the coming week at his office. The weather had slowly gone from bad to worse as the evening progressed as he toiled away in his cubicle, but in the twilight hours he had finished it, and he was beginning to head home and enjoy the weekend in full - knowing that in clear conscious his work and his mettle would not be needed until the following week.

He ventured out into the foul weather, homeward bound to the warm bed his wife was surely keeping for him, when things took a turn for the worst.

In the apex of the storm a mighty clash of lightning and thunder had split a tree upon the road and unbeknownst to him until it was too late, had careened headlong into the downed oaken monstrosity sending his sedan completely off the road.

Hours passed and he had not reached home, fearing the worst his wife called the authorities to look for him.

They found his wrecked car alongside the road in a ditch, split down the middle with our poor protagonist lacerated and unconscious amid the wreckage.

The paramedics did what they could and at the hospital they called his wife. Distraught she came with haste, although as fast as the foul weather could permit. She reached the nurse at the entrance and she was escorted to her husband's room.

The doctor emerging from the room walked up to the missus and said, "Ma'am, I'm sorry but it seems that with the resulting crash your husband was caught in an reversible injury, he is crippled. We're sorry."

The wife, beginning to openly weep for her husband, could only ask, "How does it look, how is he?! Will he be okay?"

The doctor replied, "It seems as though he'll be all right."

>> No.16011124

not who you're talking to, but that one's just kinda lame.

>> No.16011127

It's implied racism. You can't say he's black, and then at the end of the joke say that him being black didn't matter, because you specified he was black in the beginning presumably for no other reason than to illustrate why he would be arrested in the punchline. Otherwise, why would you mention it?

ITT: We ignore the fundamentals of language and communication

>> No.16011135

If I crossed the line it depends if I like the person or not. If I do then I will stop because I don't want them to become uncomfortable, but if I don't fuck them because everyone else is having a good time.

>> No.16011149

Damn spellcheck removed "irreversible injury" and for that I apologize. I had seeing jokes half-assed.

>> No.16011176

it wasn't a long joke either. and fully 15% of it was spent telling us the man was black.

well, that's not dickish at least, although it is passively antagonistic.

>> No.16011214

if you give her intoxicants and she willingly ingests them, she is trusting you NOT TO RAPE HER

>> No.16011218

I've got a lot more jokes like the one previous, they're long with a very bad pun as the punchline. Every time I tell them they get longer because I add more to it in the process. I like long jokes because I can do that. I also have funny stories, and a lot of in-jokes that I tell with people.

I'm not the funniest guy, but I do have a sense of humor and dirty jokes aside its at least half decent.

>> No.16011230

if she doesn't want you to fuck her while she's high, she also needs to not tell you to fuck her.

>> No.16011237


>> No.16011239


Consent is active, not passive; her not saying no is very, very different from her saying yes.

>> No.16011287

yeah, exactly.

so why would the fact that she's high invalidate the fact that she said yes?

>> No.16011310
File: 24 KB, 300x300, 771490-puke_large.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

This thread was really cool. Then really, really fucking gay. Then it showed small signs of coming back to cool. But instead it just went REALLY fucking gay again.

We are not at 285 posts. I feel like I have been jipped. You owe me a fucking thread with anecdotes about obnoxious people, god damn it.

>> No.16011361

>thread turns into that guy being that guy

Welp, I'll share a story because I can.

I've told this story a while back but I'll tell it again because I can. Now I do wargaming at Sir Games A Lot in Barrie, a fine establishment with a bro-tier shop owner and a lot of bro tier players.

Now of course, that may sound like a paradise, but every rose has its thorns (For lack of a better figure of speech).

This man, we'll call him "shit eating grin" as he's been come to known due to his signature grin, a real shit eating grin. He plays Warhammer 40k and has gone through about three armies.

The first warning came up in a 3v2 game with me (Chaos at the time), my bro (Chaos as well), and another bro (IG, TANKS TANKS TANKS TANKS) faced off against him with him having enough of an army for the game to be a 3v2.

Let me start this off by saying that he cannot paint to save his life, I don't think his hand is involved in the process of painting a model to be honest. I usually describe the process of him painting a model by dipping it in a bucket of baby barf yellow paint (In the case of his tau) and blow drying the paint before it can settle, resulting in a twisted monstrosity that cannot be called a tau. His tanks also seem to embody that of a roaming circus, being blue with green polka-dots or red with yellow polka-dots (I shit you not!).

Now the game gets off to a whirling start much to his dismay, where my chaos landraider rushes forward with a squad of 6, 5 Tzeentch Terminators plus a sorcerer lord outfitted in the same manner.

Continued in next post...

>> No.16011370 [DELETED] 
File: 513 KB, 240x180, 7774-1271525983.jpg.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>mfw you both misread my comment.

>> No.16011423

Now my chaos landraider made it quite a ways before the cargo departed, laying immediate waste to a firewarrior squad and continuing up the right side, my friends are doing quite well in the same manner.

You can already tell that he's getting annoyed, he began to fidget and his hands would shake as he moved his models, and he wouldn't dare meet our gazes, nor would he communicate with his ork teammate.

The game continued on and all was well until something bad happened, terrifyingly bad, something that would seal his fate as our shop's "That guy". He decided to deep strike a unit of drones behind a basilisk in order to derail my friend's artillery, because it was dealing quite a number.

He missed his intended target and after multiple measurements (He was really anal about measuring deep striking and what-not) it was found that his drones veered to the corner of the basilisk, he placed his drones down beside the basilisk and bunched them off to one side in the classic "They totally aren't touching!" manner. After we explained to him that he couldn't do that, he put them back normally, claiming that they wouldn't mishap.

They did.

He stared dumbstruck at the scene and claimed it not to be so, and after asking him why it would not, he exploded. He bellowed out an autistic warcry and began to stomp his feet, screeching and mumbling words, some of which being: "This isn't fair!" "I have to deal with my little brother and all I get is this!" and other such things.

He then ended the game right there and then, packed up all of his models and we left for lunch. His ork teammate told us that when we left for lunch, he spoke to him without end about how we were all cheating snakes and how he would've won if not for that.

More stories in next post!

>> No.16011446

You have my thanks for your efforts to rescue this thread.

>> No.16011461

God speed

>> No.16011482

Now shit eating grin was somehow a wealthy man (I believe obtained disability checks and spent it all on Warhammer) and went through several armies. He tried his hand at a sister of battle army and fluffed them as the usual SoB, but said that they "Offered special favours to inquisitors in exchange for technology". What surprised me more is how they were successful in any way because he simply spray painted them black and attempted to paint some of the models. He only finished a tank and the living saint, leaving the rest spraypainted black.

By this time I was well into my Imperial Guard army, and I stomped him at every turn, which caused no rage until his living saint failed to come back. Though it wasn't much of a real rage moment, he promptly flipped the bird at the offending living (Well, dead now) saint and threw the poor thing into his box without a single word.

Eventually, he said that he never wanted to play me again because of various reasons he would never speak to me of.

Time went on and he sold his tau army (Which he kept in a HUGE tupperware container) for $1.50 Canadian, the army of which was well over 4000 points. He stuck to his sisters for a while, but dared to play against me one final time, the week previous I had sold him 2 karskin for $16 as he needed some stormtroopers, well fair enough I thought. When I faced him for the last time in 40k, my poor karskin were shredded monstrosities of their former selves and I spared no mercy in ending their tortured existence (As well as his army, but that's aside the point). After this battle, he started to twitch and piled his SoB into his tupperware container and handed it off to my friend, another army that was well over 4000 points handed away, but this time for free. Before he left, he said aloud to the person he handed the box to: "You can have these. Just don't give ANYTHING to anon!" and then he left.

>> No.16011524

Can the poor SoB be repainted? Saved?

>> No.16011535

My buddy didn't give a shit, and I obtained my karskin back, stripping them of paint and giving them a well deserved repainting.

Now.. Shit eating grin moved onto fantasy...

He started immediately going into dwarves, boasting about how he was going to kick all of our asses and show us what's up. My Tzeentch Warriors of Chaos had other plans.

Now, he painted his dwarves the oddest colours, gold and silver. He was proudly showing his dwarves off to me, gold skin and silver everything else (Save for some helmets, axes, and armour) and I inquired: "Are you only using these two colours?". To which he replied: "I will add red, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.". Thankfully, I have not seen the "finished" dwarves.

I faced off against him with my relatively small army of WoC (Which was growing slowly as I was already painting some tomb kings and finishing my IG) and promptly magicked (Which is odd because I think dwarves have many nifty anti magic items) and stomped his dwarves into dust. To this, he silently raged, but proclaimed again that he would never play against me.

Time passed and I finished a huge battle with my buddy (Who also played chaos, oddly enough it was a Tzeentch + Khorne match up), my army had grown since then and I added a khorne champion to my ranks (Yeah yeah Tzeentch and all that, but I couldn't resist how awesome he looked). I was facing off against another "That guy" who was sort of cool but could be creepy. My Khorne hero destoryed the casket unit thing (The one that carts off vampire ruins).

Later on, shit eating grin had been going on about how the casket was invincible, as no one had defeated it, when I chimed in on how my khorne hero turned it into firewood with his axe (The undead player agreeing), he turned to me and angrily growled, yelling: "I DID NOT ASK YOU, SHUT UP!".

>> No.16011536

This KIND of makes me feel a LITTLE better about myself. When I'm getting fucking curb stomped, I stop talking and say only what is absolutely nessecary. But I never quit. I just get silent-rage.

I wouldn't stand up, verge-of-tears, and fucking throw out all my shit for free.

>> No.16011540

Once you go black you never go back

>> No.16011556
File: 30 KB, 288x270, 1306407814831.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Oh god. That's just not right. I don't even PLAY 40K, or know what a Sister of Battle is, but I know about fucking painting, and to have all those little pieces just ruined. He soiled it...soiled it! SOILED IT! SOILED IT! SOILED IT! SOILED IT!

>> No.16011576
File: 275 KB, 2608x856, 1304194082752.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

From what my friend told me, they've been repainted and given away to one of his friends, since then he's taught him how to play. Phew!

Now... Since then he had moved away from the city but occasionally visits us whilst we play, playing the friendliest guy you could ever meet, though I think he's really bullshitting, he even talks to me normally now.

His actions include but are not limited to:

-Creating a board out of those sponge puzzle piece things and using a dollar store plastic castle as the main piece, claims it's a huge gift to the store though it's been long since broken up and left in the corner of the playing area.

-Called my friend's girlfriend jailbait in front of her and then bumped elbows with him, grinning all the while.

-Caused all of the customers to leave the store on multiple occasions, though is still allowed around because of his tendency to spend A LOT of money in the store.

-Would attempt to organize custom games, though only would invite players he would like in, assigning them roles in a strict as possible manner

-Spent absurd amounts of money commissioning others to paint models for him, only for him to scratch them up or break them, and then pay more money for them to be repaired.

-Would reveal his large strech mark filled stomach to the world by wiping his face with his shirt, as well as look like he shaved with a butcher's knife

-Be an all around pain in the ass, wearing anime shirts and complaining about every army that wasn't his, and only complemented the other that guy's army, saying that all of our paint jobs were "Shoddy" in comparison.

There's more to him and the other that guy, but if /tg/'s willing, I'll write more, sounds good?

>> No.16011579

I sometimes play Axis and Allies with my friends. One of them, when he starts to lose (and he always loses) starts lining up all the models into ranks and ignores the game. If he can, he spends all his money on battleships and aircraft carriers and keeps them in port.

>> No.16011607

Bump for hilarious stories.

>> No.16011610

yeeeeeeessss right more, you savior of threads.

>> No.16011611
File: 13 KB, 360x279, 01-DrStrange-closeup.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

What was the power of that guy in OP's story?
What was it that made him a special snowflake and can't be copied.

If it's something lame I swear to god that I will whoop his ass over google street view once I find him.

>> No.16011635

The canonical Black Terror had a suite of powers, but it was mainly just generic Super Strength and Invulnerability.

Actually one of the public domain superheroes with the most potential, IMO.

>> No.16011665

Where did shit-eater-man go? That glorious, glorious anon

>> No.16011670

Sure! Right on it.

Now, at our Wargaming store we have another individual that I can consider "That Guy". He's the kind of guy that you can consider a common "That guy" writing inane fluff and an all around douchebag.

He's a rather tall man with orange as can be hair and an obsession with females, so much in fact that he likes to reveal his fantasies to my friends and I, the fantasy being: "I would love to tie a girl down to a bed and fuck her and fuck her and fuck her until she begs for more!". This in a relatively crowded wargaming room with some younger people already sets off alarm bells.

Now he plays space marines, and almost in celebration of the mary sueness of many space marines, wrote a huge shit brick of a story for them that he will try and squeeze in at every opportunity to tell us about.

To start, they are black with red eyes (Just black with red eyes) and are called the "Nova Dragons" who have mutations that give them claws and other dragon-y things (He has a tail on one of his models, a captain I believe) that I didn't care to remember.

He also loves to tell us about how he's totally against the emperor and all that he stands for, but still fights for humanity and regularly exchanges technology with the tau and eldar, incorporating several of their technologys into his ships and weaponry.

His chapter master is a huge beast of a leader and wins every battle he's been in with flying colours, also executing every inquisitor he's come across because the INQUISITORS ARE REAL BAD MEN. His chapter master is also a null and he attempts to force this rule ingame, saying that no psychic powers may affect his chapter master (Though I turned him into a spawn once, hah!).

>> No.16011680

Ok here's my story.
The group meets at a coffee shop just off campus because coffee
Part of the group is there early and talking about rpgs/ playing poker/ whatever
That guy overhears us and comes and asks if we're playing rpgs
Says that he loves roleplaying
Campaign is early enough into it that adding a new person wouldnt be too bad
So ask if he wants to join in
He says yes and starts filling out a character sheet
Campaign is set just before WWI he decides he's going to play a fascist
Everyone else is playing British or Americans
As soon as he ends up alone with my character he immediately pulls his gun and shoots them in the back
Everyone looks at him and goes "what the fuck"
Loots my character's body and tells me hes doing me a favor by metagaming and leaving my character only mostly dead and not putting another several rounds in their head
I might have called him a cunt at this point I don't quite remember

>> No.16011702
File: 27 KB, 345x369, 1311703028109.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

You, sir, are a savior of threads.

>> No.16011703 [DELETED] 
File: 29 KB, 403x315, 1299133094181.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>have obsession with wife females, libido is crazy thanks to medication I take
>enjoy discussing porn with my best friend
>mfw I don't wanna be that guy

>> No.16011710

He's gone off to Newmarket, but still visits us. (If you're talking about the shit eating grin).

To be fair, he's a nice painter but he comes across as a real douchebag about it and will not stop to criticize every mistake that you've made, and when you point out any of his, he'll be quick to the defensive, claiming that the mistake adds character to the model.

Other than him constantly going on about how his space marines are more loyal and more awesome than any other space marine chapter, he's got an attitude that will defend his little plastic men to the end.

When he's beaten (He loves to cheese, but will still have his ass handed to him) he will descend into a fit of fury, claiming that his chapter can never be beaten and that he wants a rematch.

When rematches are given, he'll use the exact same strategy, and when he loses, he'll just give up and sulk in the corner for the remainder of the day, or he'll read the space marine codex over and over again.

He also plays fantasy, vampire counts to be specific. He jumps on the idea of vampires, especially female ones, and will not end his talk about his army containing large breasted vampires and what-not.

Thankfully he cannot attempt to enforce any of his "Hurr he's a null!" or space marine bullshit in fantasy, so if he's ever beat, the rage is contained slightly. Though of course there's special occasions where he'll rage.

In the large 2v2 game with my other chaos bro (The one where my khorne champ destroyed the casket carrier thingee), he had the bright idea of charging into Archeon with his lord vampire and hero vampire. (Who had recently unleashed his daemon sword to destroy a unit). Lucky rolls were had and the combat was sustained for a turn, where he had the opportunity to charge in several units before hand to ensure a victory or at least more wounds, yet he did not.

>> No.16011712

>with wife females
Wait. What? Just "With females". No "wife"

>> No.16011714

being horny doesn't make you that guy. Everyone is horny. It's all about where and when you make it known (not in public)

>> No.16011717
File: 200 KB, 480x555, birth-of-a-super-villain.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>The canonical Black Terror had a suite of powers, but it was mainly just generic Super Strength and Invulnerability.
>just generic Super Strength and Invulnerability.
>"What the fuck do you mean, he copies my power?"
>"I will punch the shit out of the bitch. That way she will learn that only I can have my powers!"
>just generic Super Strength and Invulnerability.

>> No.16011727

But I'm especially horny. Adderall gives you a libido boost. Hoooo boy, I could go into some weird shit...but I wont.

I don't talk about it public though...so I guess I'm not quite that guy, but I feel off-put.

>> No.16011736
File: 50 KB, 546x366, Bueno Excelente signature.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.16011737

The funniest part is there was literally a Black Terror of Mexico.

>> No.16011741

Hell you could fuck goats in your basement but as long as you don't bring that up at the table you are not that guy

>> No.16011746
File: 38 KB, 430x300, 1312931461470.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I think I get what you mean. You're definitely no that guy, though. As long as you don't act like some socially retarded neckbeard 24/7 (or describe your fantasies during a session or something) then you're fine. everyone feels a little off-put here and there at some point.

>> No.16011747
File: 16 KB, 298x387, WHATATWEEST.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.16011754

When my khorne champ finished with the casket thing, he charged straight into the side of the "Heroic" charge and helped Archeon to vaporize the two vampires. When they lost their final wounds, he stared at us dumbstruck, said in a plain voice: "I give up" and packed up his units, leaving as quick as they were packed up.

He also had a habit of smacking me on the head for no reason, he only did it twice to me before I stared him down and told him to fucking cut that shit out, he's never dared put a hand near my head since.

He was also the greediest fuck I've ever met, seriously. Every time his birthday rolled around (It's actually coming early September) he would beg to everyone in the store for birthday money and would invite everyone to his house, provided they brought money.

He would always tell me things in the most passive manner, such as: "Oh, you didn't bring my birthday money this week? Don't worry, you can bring it next week." or "You know, I've been looking at buying more terminators, buy me some for my birthday.". Much like shit eating grin, he also obtains disability checks which he spends entirely on Warhammer and video games.

For shits and giggles I allowed him to paint one of my karskin because he really wanted to, next week I was greeted with a karskin painted with full nazi motifs, telling me that it's okay if they are in miniature form.

Things that he has done include:

-Cheating multiple times, including the whole "hurr my custom special snowflake chapter rules"

-attempting to reroll dice when we aren't looking

-attempting to use a model's own squad as cover (My karskin fired a plasma gun at his marine squad, to which he said "I get cover because his sqaud member is in the way")

-Only ate poutine much like shit eating grin

-Would constantly flaunt his pagan beliefs to us, telling us that he can control fire and that he has always wanted to be a girl

-Would also flaunt his superior anime tastes for reasons unknown

>> No.16011773

-Would ask us about our army's fluff and then degrade us for it, saying that his is obviously written better and what-not

-Also loves to tell us that he's off his meds and will pop any second, and that if he hurts or kills us, it isn't his fault (I shit you not.)

-Is writing a book on his chapter that he wants us to read, no doubt filled with SoB rape, inquisitor killing and general stupid shit.

-Also loves to try and tell us how to play our armies or how to write our fluff, including the whole "Just make sure that they don't worship the emprah because the emprah is a bad man!"

He rarely goes anymore for reasons that I don't know, when I asked about, nobody seemed to know why he never went. He loved to argue about history and how Canadians were better than americans in EVERY WAY POSSIBLE and could've taken on the full german army in WWII without any help. He also went on about how Canadian technology was better than anything Americans had at the time (Though Cannucks essentially used everything American at the time...), attempting to argue anything other than blindly accepting his view point results in him screaming at you with blind fury. He's improved a little bit since then, and pretty much only plays DnD, he only runs dragonborn.

There's not many other "That Guys" that go anymore, and since I don't go as much anymore, I only hear about others that go, like a huge fat neckbeard named Scott who cheats and rolls with the cheese army's (Gray knights now).

Or an ork player that rages everytime you kill one of his heroes. I killed his big mek with marbo and he threw said big mek across the room and against a wall, not picking the model up until the battle was over.

>> No.16011778

NOBODY HAS MY POWERS BUT ME! Except this one Mexican dude...

>> No.16011780

>passive way
>"Buy it for me"
Bro. That ain't passive.

>> No.16011791

I think that's the wrong way to describe it, but he'd say it in a very casual manner, very off-hand.

Bad word to describe it, my bad.

>> No.16011793
File: 38 KB, 528x440, 1307492290033.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

For clarification (since this is my first day here and I do not have any idea how these games work) what happens when you lose a hero? In the context and game you're talking about?

>> No.16011815
File: 204 KB, 1000x1420, 18-12-2009 00;33;44.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>We have a guy in our group that has vagina on the brain all the time.

I knEW that scaNlating THat PARTICULAR story WAS THE rIGHt THIng TO do.

>> No.16011820
File: 524 KB, 2592x1944, 1234389393845.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


For his particular army, there was no additional loss to the army as a whole except for losing a competent champion.

However for other armies, there are consequences that the army suffers if the hero is killed.

For example, if a tau ethereal is killed (I can't remember this too well so forgive me if I make mistakes), the entire tau army takes a morale test and gains hatred against the army for the rest of the game.

He does the same for his ork army in fantasy and is just known for raging at his heroes' dying in general, when my Tzeentch sorcerer's pandemonium (In summary screws up the army's leadership and makes spells easier to miscast) caused his goblin shaman to off itself, he threw the model on the ground and stomped on it, then gave up and left.

You cannot imagine the look on his face when Old Zogwort's ability does not affect Imperial Guard officer's (As they are not independent characters and therefore cannot be squiggified).

>> No.16011822

Dude, I get off on having sharp knives dragged against my neck and being whipped.
... and it doesn't affect my social life at all
oh well

>> No.16011824

Oh. I thought maybe this was like DnD or something where if your cherished and favorite character you thought up gets killed, you can never use them again. Cause that'd really upset me too.

In this guys case, he's a fagort.

>> No.16011830

It is not, though it does mean that one of your (Most of the time) most cherished and well painted models does not see the battlefield until the next match.

For some reason this frustrates people to no end, and I do admit that it does frustrate me for my nice shiny tank to get blown up first turn, there's always another game.

>> No.16011840

I sort of know that feel, I guess. I remember playing Heroscape, there was a few characters I really liked, forget which, and it really, really irritated me when they were "killed". But I didn't say anything or stop playing, or even worse, BREAK THE FUCKING PIECE I LIKE SO MUCH. Why throw it to the floor, what the fuck.

I mean, I've thrown vidya game controllers, but I'd never throw something like that, it's just....well it's different, you know? It's just different.

>> No.16011842

they might just be getting mad because they aren't that good and rely on heroes to be effective.

>> No.16011852
File: 43 KB, 506x498, 1304187598328.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Much like a kid who plays salamanders.

He's a young one, but at least you can hold a conversation with him, though he always has Vulkan in his army, relying on him to always save the day.

He even pits him alone with no squad to soak up fire believing him to be invincible, yet most of the time a sentinel off's him with a lascannon.

It's absolutely hilarious though he seems to keep doing the same thing, never really thinking about how such a mighty hero can fall to a single shot.

>> No.16011860
File: 72 KB, 480x800, 1254785723155.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

True, it is most definitely different in my opinion, I mean, you spend money on a controller and if you break it, it's your fault and what-not, you just buy another and swear that you try and rage less.

But something that costs a fair bit of money, is quite fragile, and you spend hours painting it only to throw it to the ground for an unlucky roll and stomp on it as if it amounted to nothing, I would never think of doing it to any of my things.

>> No.16011863
File: 107 KB, 599x654, Bueno_bling_bling.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.16011875
File: 4 KB, 100x100, jesus christ how horrifying.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.16011982

Vidya controler=Dice
Console=Rule book
CD/DISK=Suplementary rule book.

>> No.16012127
File: 59 KB, 500x548, tumblr_lexlvqn5mm1qg8i80o1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I'm gonna share to not let this tread die.

>> In my roleplaying group, we are 5.
>> Me, a music addict, the girlfriend of the music addict, the Assperger (a real one medically speaking) and That Guy.
>> The aspie when he started to play with us come clean and easy "I'f I start talking about something and I exagerate, don't hesitate to tell me to shut the fuck up. I will not be offended" (Is own words)
>> Every time the aspie open is mouth, That Guy shout him to shut the fuck up. And by every time, I mean every fucking time, even when it's interesting, our aspie can't tell two word because of that fat ass.

The worst part? That Guy is my roommate so If I kick him out of the game, he will be unbearable out of the game.

>> No.16012154
File: 6 KB, 80x80, Thousandsonflip.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Bump for more hilarious stories, again.

>> No.16012177
File: 51 KB, 576x768, 1294204251889.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>rolling up rifts characters
>that guy's turn
>wants to play a cyberknight
>several hours of picking stuff later, we're wrapping up details
>wants to be master psionic
>the rolls favor minor psionic, I tell him I'll give him major, and he can roll for master if he wants
>but he's stuck with what he gets if he rolls
>takes the roll.
>triple rolling during character creation, not bad odds for him.
>rolls minor psionic
"I want to play a mind melter"
pic related

>> No.16012195
File: 20 KB, 337x300, 431-Ahmadinajad3001.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Well maybe you shouldn't play RPGs when you are that young.

>> No.16012420

>A pimp should NEVER fuck his own girls, or at least limit himself to one or two.

From what I'Ve gathered from actual interviews with prostiutes, most pimps are basically male prostitutes serving female prostitutes. The problem being that they stand at the top of a pyramid game and sometimes beat the people investing into it.

That does not include the pretty common human trafficking - being forced into prostitution after being robbed of your passport and being cursed by a voudoo priest - type of pimp.

>> No.16012438
File: 29 KB, 225x350, 110143.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


As a gamer is somewhat saddens me that people look at their controllers in such a callous way. Humans were playing games with controllers decades ago, and they're still playing with them now. Controllers are humanity's friends. Can I abandon a friend?

>> No.16012505

>First time playing WH
>At my home
>"friend" comes here.
>Only other person who plays
>Ain't even gonna read the rules
>FUuuuu i'll sez him the rules.
>Obsesed with lore.
>Teclis iz the uber pro
>SHUP UP =/= Game
>But high faggots r teh bezt!

>> No.16013560

Peaceful talks about committing genocide against a 'race' she personally views as monsterous but failing to grasp that the talk itself is monsterous should be put down. She was Darwin's model of a woman, no less bloodthirsty and perpetually wanting to improve her lot than the other half of the species, but doing it through deception rather than force. Women doing what women do and men doing what men do, according to the woman, is like getting upset that two and two is four, just as one as three is four.

>> No.16013594

My That Guy is one of my best fiends, but also my 3.5 GM at the moment. He's a bit slow-witted and doesn't know what the hell he wants to do with us, although there's only two of us aside from him. He's got a half dozen plot hooks he could develop between our two characters, or just fucking kill them off because a rogue and a fighter does not an effective two-man party make, but he just sits there and flounders.

>> No.16013852
File: 6 KB, 252x260, 127.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

This is more with video games but here we go.

At my community college, there are several people I already know through my brother or met in High school. We were all playing SSFIV AE(Well, I was watching since I haven't played Street fighter in years) set up in the cafeteria, and we pretty much go there during breaks and inbetween classes.

One day, I was bored so I decided to try playing. This one guy with a full beard was sitting next to me. Now, because I don't play SF, I also don't keep up with the tiers so I picked El Fuerte because he reminded me of Ray Mysterio and I was a fan of him in my youth. Suddenly he gives me this really, really dirty look. As if I slapped him and molested his mother. I ignored it because I was just looking to have fun.

I do get a few hits in, but since the player(my brother's friend) was a more veteran player than me he pretty much kicked my ass. Suddenly the other guy goes "I thought you said you were good!", I mention that I said no such thing and that the other girl that was hanging around mentioned that. Then he gets this frustrated look, stands up and leaves. I hand off the controller to someone who actually plays the game and just watch for the rest of the day.

>> No.16014716


MOST small-time pimps. Not the good ones.

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