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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.15689839 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

There was a good thread a while back were people shared their stories fixing things with the glorious help of the Ominisiah. Anyone got any stories to share?

I will be posting prayers to the machine god out of the Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer. Also, on a somewhat-related note, can anyone come up with a band name that references the machine god?

>> No.15689876

Litany of Unjamming:
To be recited when clearing a jammed weapon (or disc drive):

Spirits of the Machine-God, aid
you servant and free his weapon
so he may use it to break his foes.

Litany of Cleanliness:
To be recited when cleaning your lasgun, or the gunk out of your keyboard:

Let my hand wipe the grime from
your perfect form,
May you purify with your bolts
of light.

Canticle of Appeasement:
To be recited to the Machine Spirit when stripping a weapon:

Be still, spirits,
I do what I must,
Forgive the intrusion,
And give me your trust.

>> No.15689913

>a band name that references the machine god?

Mechanicus sounds pretty good to me.

>> No.15689926

Catechism of the Machine
To be recited to the Machine Spirits, with the utmost gravity, when performing a disruptive procedure on a mechanical device:

With your strength you protect me,
With my care I repair you,
With sacred oil I appease you,
Be quiet, good spirits,
And accept my benediction

Litany of Completion:
To be recited when assembling your lasgun:

Spirits of the machine, accept my due,
Walk amidst the gun, and fire it true.

>> No.15689937

It does sound good, it's just a shame that everything that references the machine god sounds a bit metally.

>> No.15689941

From weakness of the mind, Omnissiah save us,
from the lies of the Antipath, circuit preserve us,
from the rage of the Beast, iron protect us,
from the temptations of the flesh, silica cleanse us,
from the ravages of time, anima shield us,
from this rotting cage of biomatter,
Machine god, set us free.

>> No.15689944

It could be like Bolt Thrower but electronic.

>> No.15689945

Could fit electronica too.

>> No.15689964

>Nintendo 64 hasn't worked in years
>One day pull it out
>Say some litany or something to the Machine Spirit of the 64
>Plug it all in
>Put in SSB
>It works
>MFW I am a techpriest

>> No.15689966

Litany of Loading:
To be recited when loading your weapon:

Machine Spirit, accept my gift,
Swallow the light, and spit out death

Litany of Unloading:
To be recited when unloading your weapon:

Machine Spirit, forgive my actions,
Soon you shall be whole again.

Litany of Durability:
To be recited to your weapon before combat ensues:

Machine Spirits,
In all your unknowable grace and wisdom,
Grant my weapon durability,
So that it may serve me,
As I serve you,
With faith, care and servility.

That's everything in the Primer that relates to the machine god. I can post up some other prayers if people are interested.

>> No.15689970

There is no truth in flesh, only betrayal.
There is no strength in flesh, only weakness.
There is no constancy in flesh, only decay.
There is no certainty in flesh but death.

>> No.15689995

Actually, I think Machine Spirits or Spirits of the Machine could work as band names.

>> No.15690091

The Flesh is Weak

Omnissian Power Axe

>> No.15690549

"Autolochus of Mars" doesn't sound like a metal band.
Speaking of which.

Toll the Great Bell Once!
Pull the Lever forward to engage the Piston and Pump...

Toll the Great Bell Twice!
With push of Button fire the Engine and spark Turbine into life...

Toll the Great Bell Thrice! Sing praise to the God of All Machines!

Catechism of the Autolocus of Mars

>> No.15691904

The Litany of Kinetic Abjuration [High Gothic version]:

The fuck?
[Then shalt thou striketh a hammerblow using thine fist]
This piece o' shit's broken AGAIN?

>> No.15691938

>Pray to Omnissiah for good cyberpunkish manga
>Find new issues of Battle Angel Alita

>> No.15691960

was seriously considering putting Enginseer on my business card.

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