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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.14039642 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

The beacon of amon din is lit! Gondor calls for aid!

>> No.14039654

>> No.14039658

UPDATE!

Nobody gives a shit about Gondor so FUCK 'EM!

>> No.14039664

Dey gotz me choppy.

>> No.14039666

Who gives a fuck? The game is on.

>> No.14039674

>>14039664

>> No.14039677

And Thor shall Answer!

>> No.14039697

>>14039658
I gigg... well, okay, I _thought_ about giggling

>> No.14039700

>>14039677

We follow you, Sigmar!

>> No.14039704

tauren marines, first in and last out!

>> No.14039720

YOU WILL HAVE MY OLD SPICE SCENTED BODY WASH!

>> No.14039725

>>14039664
and my axe!

>> No.14039737

>>14039677
>>14039642

Gondor, and Thor, shall fall!

>> No.14039739

"Give us a target, Gondor."

>> No.14039757

>>14039674
WE'RE WARRIORS, WARRIORS OF THE WORLD!

Seriously, don't use that image if you don't know what it stands for, you fucking hack.

>> No.14039772

Freedom is the right of all sentient beings!

>> No.14039797

>>14039737
AAAAALLL SHAAAAALLL FAAAAALLL!

>> No.14039804 [DELETED] 

I am so fucked.

>> No.14039813

>>14039664

And my Morgan Freeman.

>> No.14039834

Lance leader, following you.

>> No.14039842

Fuck this I'm outta here...


... aw cock ...

>> No.14039854

>>14039804

We have your back, Sauron. Don't worry about it.


(lol'd by the way)

>> No.14039856

...Mogo socializes for Gondor.

>> No.14039869

>>14039797
NO WE ARE NEUTRAL.

>> No.14039880 [DELETED] 

>>14039854
YES!

Suaron calls for aid, who will anwser the Dark Lord's call.

>> No.14039884

I'll watch your back.

>> No.14039899

>>14039880

The Word Bearers stand by to assist you, Sauron. The price will be discussed at a later date.

>> No.14039902

>>14039869
That's what I said, buddy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-peaOtLRxE

>> No.14039908

>>14039880
Why hello there.

>> No.14039919 [DELETED] 

>>14039899
Yes yes, of course. My master Suaron the great bids thee welcome.

>> No.14039954

>>14039880

Hey bro, don't worry about these "Forces of Light". We got this. My brothers'll be here in a bit if they know what's good for them.

>> No.14039975

Commencing orbital insertion. Estimated time to combat: 16.5423927 minutes.

>> No.14039979

Gondor calls for aid?
They must be desperate, sounds like a good opportunity for making a change of leadership...

>> No.14039989

RALLY TO ME, FORCES OF LIGHT! RALLY TO ME!

>> No.14039993

>>14039975

I don't think so, cunt.

>> No.14040011

>>14039993

Ohh how cute, a converted bulk hauler with guns strapped onto thinks it can stop a Bolo.

>> No.14040022

>>14039993

Escorts coming in to support sir.

>> No.14040033

>>14040011

You forgot the part where Ahriman summoned a Warp Leviathan and it ate your fleet.

>> No.14040052 [DELETED] 

HAHAAHA!

Gondor shall fall, the age of the orc, not man, will begin. The forest will cry out in agony and the Elves will flee like the cowards they are. The dwarves will seal them selves away and I will make their mountains their tombs. The land will beg for mercy as we rape it for our needs. The sky will turn into ash, Forces of the light try your best, but you will fail.

I AM THE DARK LORD SAURON! I AM YOUR DOOM! FORCES OF DARKNESS RALLY! WE GO TO WAR AND VICTORY!

>> No.14040065

>>14040022

We're right behind you. Keep'em busy.

>> No.14040071

BRETONNIA ALL UP IN THIS BITCH!!!

>> No.14040079

>>14040052
There has been a change in management, mister 'Sauron'. We no longer appreciate your overt, brutal tactics.

>> No.14040085

>>14040052

You're kinda creepy, bro. And that's coming from me.

>> No.14040086

>>14040065
Opening up with the broadsides.

>> No.14040096

>>14040052

I am Lady Aeria of the Order of the Jaguar. Hear me Dark Lord, your final hour has come. HOLLLLYY SMITE!

>> No.14040109

>>14040086

The fleet's almost in position, sir. We need to buy them a bit more time.

>> No.14040124

>>14040065
>>14040022
>>14039993
>>14040086
Did someone say spaceships?

>> No.14040127

>>14040096

Shut up, cunt. Don't make me sneeze on you.

>> No.14040132

>>14040109

Right you are, assault craft on the way.

>> No.14040150

>>14040124
Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. All guns, target their salvage corvettes, before they take our strike craft!

>> No.14040164

>>14040150
Yay! We don't have this kind of tech yet!
Fleet Command, get the rest of the girls here!

>> No.14040178

>>14040150
>>14040132

Fuck this shit and fuck this planet, fleet's in position. Fuck everyone on it. For the Emperor and all that shit.

>> No.14040194

>>14040164

Blow the shit out of those tech heretics.

>> No.14040213

TREMBLE IN FEAR, FOLLOWERS OF SAURON!
THE MOAS ARE COMING! AND THEY COME IN FORKLIFTS!

>> No.14040216 [DELETED] 

So, some challenge my rule, go ahead and try. Now for those who don't want the light to win I suggest we form up.

THIS DAY ALL THE SWORDS OF MAN WILL STRIKE AS ONE AND THEY WILL FAIL! FOLLOW ME FORCES OF DARKNESS!

>> No.14040235

>>14040216
I can't hear you over middle earth being Exterminatus'd

>> No.14040256 [DELETED] 

>>14040235
WHAT!?!

OH SSSHHHHHAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

>> No.14040270

>>14040194
Oh hai. We heard there were ships here. Can't have those Taiidani bastads have all the tech, now can we.
Also, look into those 'Warp Drive' thingies, see if we can make a cannon out of it.

>> No.14040283

>>14040256

Hohoho! Imperator dominat galaxia eterna bitch.

>> No.14040304

>>14040270

Readying the Nova cannon...

>> No.14040342

>>14040304
Oh lookie, they're trying to hit us with main artillery, just like the Emperor's Guard. These will look NICE on our cruisers, though. Or maybe we can build a frigate around one.

>> No.14040343 [DELETED] 

>>14040283
mehahahaha

eheahahah

HHAAHAHAHAH

FOOLS! ONLY THE FIRES OF MOUNT DOOM CAN DESTORY ME! YOUR MORTAL WEAPONS DO NOTHING AGAINST ME! BLOW UP THE WHOLE PLANET! THAT DOES NOTHING! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

>> No.14040354

>>14039704
Because of how my mouse was situatied, that came across as "First in, last cut." I was depressed to find out it read last out.

>> No.14040385

I have come to aid you.

>> No.14040401

>>14040343
OR the breath of a dragon.

What temperatures do you think Plasma comes at?

Exactly. Bye, bye.

>> No.14040427

>>14040342
Heh, an unarmed, unshielded vessel? How cute.
Blazan away

>> No.14040431

And my bow!

>> No.14040446 [DELETED] 

>>14040401
What? The White Council tried Dragon's Fire, it didn't work fool, get your shit right. Now, how do I destory a fleet on a cracked and dead world, hmm?

>> No.14040451

And my AXE

>> No.14040466

rolled 4 = 4

>>14040343
Oh we'll see about that.
Thank fuck for template weapons to make up for my shitty ballistic skill.

>> No.14040467

>>14040431

And our hoes!
.
.
.
The villagers fight!

>> No.14040484

>>14040446

... Are you serious? White council argued about Dragon fire, and Gandalf was even slightly annoyed he got Smaug killed, because there were no other Dragons known of. That was the whole reason they went to Mount doom. Convincing a Dragon to melt it would have been safer.

Read your fucking book.

>> No.14040486

*/**/-*./-./*.-GGEEEZ YOUU GOTTA BIG PUSSEE, GGEEZZ YOU GOTTA BIG PUSSY.-/*//.\-*/\./\/.-.-

>> No.14040502

>>14040343
Mount Doom, huh? I think I can manage one of those.

Gondor, you have my mind bullets.

>> No.14040530 [DELETED] 

>>14040484
I don't want to argue about this but there were tons more dragons, Weathered Heath I think it was called, that place had tons of dragons. There are plenty of Dragons, now back to the rest of this

>> No.14040538

Freedom is the right of all sentient beings!
AUTOBOTS! TRANSFORM AND ROLL OUT!

>> No.14040550

As president of the Gallente Federation...

I do decree that upon four score from this day, our fleets will come to your aid. Once those vile Orcs who would take another's liberties have been exterminated, we shall speak of peace.
Please consider, my fair king; how well your people will fair with the freedoms which only the Federation can provide...

>> No.14040565

>>14040530
Yeah, but no one knew about that. That's meta knowledge only Tolkien and the reader has.

>> No.14040567

>>14040550
What you gonna do? Throw spreadsheets at them?

>> No.14040572 [DELETED] 

>>14040343
Oh look at the little Sauron, thinking he is so tough, now I remeber the days when I was in power, man darkness reigned supreme. And I was never as creepy as you Sauron.

>> No.14040577

TREMBLE SAURON FOR I HAVE COME FOR YOU!

>> No.14040591

Look, the way I see it, this Sauron fucker is going about killing bitches, MY bitches. So if you folks need an extra axe to help cleave his head in, sign me up.

>> No.14040593 [DELETED] 

>>14040572
I don't need your shit right now Morgoth.

>> No.14040655

>>14040567

Good sir...

Do not underestimate the ferocity of those, who have their liberties and are willing to die in order to maintain them. Admire this fine vessel! Our Nyx carrier ship can hold enough freedom troops, vehicles, and air/ground drones to wipe out any planetary opposition...

>> No.14040705 [DELETED] 

>>14040655
Mace that can strike the center of the earth, spreadsheets.

All go with the mace.

>> No.14040706

>>14040655
All I hear is "Blablabla, I'm a Heretic, please kill me".

Pleased to oblige!

>> No.14040771

>>14040706

Please my good... captain.

We have both come to the aid of this primitive world, surely we can see the profits of joining an alliance. Or at least open up a trade agreement.
Though I know so little of your people, from that ship, I am sure that your technologically advanced enough to consider peace. The Federation has freedom of religion, your beliefs need not be altered... In this...fair deal.

>> No.14040777

>>14040565
Actually, they did know about it, the dwarves talked about it in the Hobbit. They did say that most dragons wouldn't be able to melt it with their breath, but that there were one or two of the really old ones that might be able to.
Anyway, that's irrelevant, try avoiding the magma when the planet has no crust.

>> No.14040852

>>14040771
Still hearing "I;m a heretic, I'm trying to corrupt loyal servants of the Emperor". I think I'll reserve a few void torpedos for you.

>> No.14041067

>>14040852

Dear, dear captain...

Is this what you want...aggression? Is that really the way for society's with our technological level?

All that we ask for is simple--profitable--peace. Why, think of all that we could share! Our culture, our knowledge. Such is the way of free people...

But if this is truly what you want, I will give you one final...warning. We have already scanned your ship, and it seems you fire your weapons manually. At first I thought this was because your kind did not actively seek out wars...

But it seems I was wrong, how sad indeed. At this time our fleet surpasses your single vessel tenfold in both numbers, fighter/bomber drones, velocity, and rapid firring. We are an immortal people. Our minds are instantly transfered to bodies light years away, upon temporary death.

So...I must ask again...
Why not peace?

>> No.14041135

>>14041067
Single vessel? Inferior weapons? A single battery of yours can lay waste to worlds, our torpedos will blow you into the very depths of the warp Heretic.

You keep on with your Heresy... Shutting down the transmitter now and firing the Torpedos. Ave Imperator! Morituri servo!

>> No.14041152

>>14041135
>A single battery of yours

Fuck sake... I meant ours, obviously.

>> No.14041181

>>14039654
lol'd my ass off. dunno why

>> No.14041226

>>14039642
>>14041067
>>14040771
>>14040655
What do you know about war? We sang songs of conquest while your ancestors crawled out from the bottom of the sea.

>> No.14041230

>>14041101

*Your torpedoes are constantly being kama kaze'd by (unmanned) drones. And your nearest tech priest screams in agony as the Presidents image reforms in the holo-emitter*

Dear...Dear...
Your people lack even the most basic of electronic warfare. Not to mention that you patchwork software is littered with insane comments about "machine spirits," and a machine god.

Not to mention this vile act... This horrid thing, stooping down to Sanshas level; these people you call servitors. You're far, far worse than the Amarrians...

So, please pray to your machine god and express your sorrow to your emperor...before we liberate your slaves!

>> No.14041252

You have my hammer.

>> No.14041279

>>14041230

>not to mention that you

*Not to mention that your .

Typos on both sides, oh no's!

>> No.14041303

SAURON! THE SPIRIT OF VENGEANCE COMES FOR YOU! YOUR SOUL IS STAINED, STAINED WITH THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT! FEEL THE PAIN OF A MILLION, MILLION DEATHS, RULER OF THE ONE RING, PARIAH OF MIDDLE-EARTH!

LOOK INTO MY EYES AND SUFFER!

>> No.14041313

MY MEDITATION HAS ENDED

>> No.14041327

>>14041230
(are you stupid? Electronic warfare on a ship that is entirely analog, magic or by force of hand?)

Electronic warfare? On a ship with no electronics whatsoever? I dare say you are wielding the power of the warp!

And if our torpedos do nothing, Our Lance batteries and Macro cannons shall show your unshielded ship what war truly means. Full fire on the starboard batteries moderati! Oh, and send half a million or so strafing craft to cover our advance.

Boarding teams to be launched at the second volley! 3 million men will do.

>> No.14041346

You are already dead, Sauron

>> No.14041351

>This thread

I fucking love you /tg/.

>> No.14041393

>>14041327

Dude...

Read your fluff man. seriously. There electronics are EVERYWHERE. It's how the tech priest's communicate with programs *cough* Machine spirits* Cough. Go read the Mechanicum before you keep embarrassing yourself.

Shssh!

>> No.14041436

>>14041393

... sure, they're powered by electricity, but the AI in a cogitator is organic. No AI program can match an actual mind. Nor would it be compatible. I rather doubt cogitators have LAN connections. It's completely analog, or magic, like I said.

>> No.14041457

>>14041327

Oh, my so many men...

All ships! Prepare five billion boarding and internal defense drones! Support ships, launch over-shield drones and prepare to boost all ship's shielding!

>> No.14041458

AND YOU HAVE MY SHOUTS!

>> No.14041493

>>14041457

This shit is hilarious. Keep fighting the Imperial Dogs. We'll be waiting to show you what real ships can do, when we've got a couple of Sorceror's onboard who just sacrificed 10,000 cultists.

Hint, it involves lots of daemons and your ripped asshole.

>> No.14041519

>>14041457
>implying drones can do shit against shotguns without damaging your own ship

heh. Your shields are up WAY too late. My lances hit your reactors around the time I spoke. So did the second, third and fourth salvos. Gotta love the speed of light. And the Macrocannon shells should hit about... Now. With the second volley on the way.

Please, do say hello to the boarding crews and fighters when they arrive in... 3,5 minutes. I have my escorts to direct so they can tear the command bridge to pieces and support the boarding action.

>> No.14041535

>>14039725
>>14040451
and my Axe!

>> No.14041565

>>14041493
CHAOS SCUM!

Sorry about that, other heretic, gonna have to redirect my ships to attack them. Don't worry, with your engines disabled, you won't be going anywhere.

Third and fourth formations! Flank the Chaos vessels from both sides, at different height levels so you can catch them between your broadsides! Fourth, approach them from underneath. I myself shall attack them in the front.

>> No.14041585

>>14041565

Oh please, sucker-of-the-golden-cock. See how these are NURGLE ships? Well, everyone in this system has already been infected with so many diseases the only reason you're not all dead yet is because they're fighting each other to see which ones actually get to kill you.

The end result is going to be lots of zombies, though.

>> No.14041599

>>14041436

Electronic warfare is not an AI only thing. Their ships still communicate with vox casters at close range, and any tech priest would still be data bomb bait. Read the forbidden science section of this before you even replay...

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37259372/Dark-Heresy-Creatures-Anathema

>> No.14041607

>>14041585
Still gonna go down, all guns blazing filthy Heretics.

Ave Imperator! Morituri honorabilis te salutant!

>> No.14041629

>>14041607

I'm sorry, all I heard was "blah blah blah, fuck me with a Virus Bomb". Can't oblige that wish, 'course.

Sorry about that ship that just blew up, by the way. Abaddon gets impatient sometimes and likes to join in the fun.

>> No.14041632 [DELETED] 

Now, i'm back. I left but I have returned. I am the one true Dark Lord no one can put them selves on the same tier as me. The seas will boil and the land will cry out as it is pillaged. COME ALL WHO WOULD FIGHT ME! LETS SEE IF YOU CAN FACE THE LORD OF THE RING! THE ONE RING! TO RULE THEM ALL!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

>> No.14041645

>>14041585
>>14041565
>>14041493
>>14041457
OM NOM NOM

>> No.14041662

>>14041645

>mfw when the Tyranid suck in space and that's where it's easiest to beat them

>> No.14041686

>>14041629
I really don't want to go on about the impossibility of the Planet Killer leaving the Eye without having the entire segmentum fleet on his ass. Suffice to say, that thing has the psychic signature the size of a warp god. Any remotely capable Navigator can detect it from systems away.

Back to battle. I still have 3 cruisers and 11 escorts. We stand a reasonable chance. All crews! Prepare for raming speed! All torpedos away! Fire untill we have no ammunition left! Every man gets a weapon! FORWARD! FOR THE EMPEROR! ONLY IN DEAT DOES DUTY END!

>> No.14041690

>>14041519

*pic's up severed arm*

*cough*
You...sir...
Have just made immortal enemies. When I awake within my new body, I will ally with every free faction in the galaxy! This was a mere scouting/ambassadorial fleet. You have yet to see the Gallente at war!

*coughs blood*
Oh,
*checks for teeth*
I wounder when you will tire of our endless assaults...

>> No.14041703

>>14041686

...I think I might have argued this with you before, good sir. REGARDLESS, THIS STARTED WITH MIDDLE EARTH. FUCK THE PLAUSABILITY.

Also, btw, the Tyranid just showed up.

>> No.14041705 [DELETED] 

None can stand before the might Suaron and Saruman, The Word Bearers, Daemons from WF, A Demon from BLizzard's Diablo, and so many others. WHO SHALL FACE ME! AHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA

>> No.14041718

>>14041690

There's an Empire like yours, that we deal with, heretic. Look at the picture.

>> No.14041754

>>14041718
Funny how you've never actually managed to finish the job.

>> No.14041763

AND MY PILE DRIVERS

>> No.14041767

>>14041754

Funny how that's because we've got Tyranid and a Black Crusade to worry about. You're small fish in a big fucking ocean, kid. Why don't you spread the other way?

>> No.14041785

>>14041632

Greetings...thing...

*Admires my new body via a French hand mirror*

I don't usually do this, but...

If I agree to take you and your army off of that planet and drop you on Terra, would you mind killing everyone of those religious fanatics and sparring their slaves? All that I ask is that you don't take alway--too many--freedoms and give us their slaves so that we may set said slaves free...

>> No.14041787

>>14041767
Because there's Orks and Bugs that way, you humans are actually a pleasure to deal with compared to them.

>> No.14041796

>>14041690
You must be from another galaxy then, Heretic loving xeno. For this is OUR galaxy. The Imperium tires not of war. For ten Millenia have we beat back the heretic, the xeno, the traitor. The likes of you do not scare us. For even if we die, we die knowing we did our duty. We die in HIS name.

You? You pathetic scum shall be overrun by the foul xenos and heretics before you can turn away from your self destructive war against the righteous. YOU. SHALL. PERISH.

VINDICT IMPERATOR HONORIS! MORTE TRAITORUM!

>> No.14041799

>>14041767
Because your "Empire" is clearly so weak that it can't protect its own borders from more than two threats.

Meanwhile, we out-adapt Tyranids and kill Chaos gods.

>> No.14041802

>>14041787

At least there's something we can agree on.

>> No.14041820

>>14041703

It's a small /tg/ after all. Well, if the Tyranids are here... YOU DIE FIRST you who turned your back on humanity, and knowingly discarded his glory.

Also because it's hard to stop a full charge when it's begun, and I've launched all my torpedos at you.

>> No.14041828

>>14041754

Excellent! Excellent!

I have long waited this meeting...

*coughs*

Our people share common views, common enemies. Why not join in an alliance? For the greater good is ultimately the liberty of all...

>> No.14041832

>>14041799

>kill Chaos Gods

Howabout no, faggot. Go fuck your ethereal's skull pussy.

>> No.14041836 [DELETED] 

>>14041785
Hmm, how bout no. I am no ones servant and If I wanted to face the Imperium it would be of my own acord. Also you say dropping me on the most heavily fortified planet is a GOOD THING!

My orcs breed while my personal power grows, with the ring it is only a matter of time before all tremble before the might of Sauron, lord of the ring.

Also look up in that Image, now think of the gates to the Emperor's throne, thats whats happening very soon.

>> No.14041855

>>14041799
You have a hundred worlds to protect. We, a million. Our armies are overstretched, our navy underequiped...

But if we could divert only one sector's resources toward you, you would all burn in the cleansing fires. But we cannot, because they are needed there, for you never know when another Hive fleet or Waagh! shows up.

>> No.14041871

>>14041828
I'm afraid you'll have to get in touch with either a Water Caste diplomat or an Ethereal, I'm only a Shas'ui and as such unable to make diplomatic decisions of such magnitude.

>> No.14041873

>>14041836
You forget I just passed by and bombed your world until it's surface became magma. Enjoy the heat, little demon!

>> No.14041895

>>14041873
Where do you Gue'la keep your fridges in these ships anyway? I just drank my last beer.

>> No.14041901

OHHHHH WRITTEN IN THE STARSSSSS
A MILLION MILES AWAAYYYYYY

>> No.14041903

>>14041871

I see...
*eats some French candy*
Would you be so kind to direct me to such a...person?

>> No.14041912

Hey guys! What's going on in this sector?

>> No.14041914 [DELETED] 

>>14041873
YOU THINK THAT DID ANYTHING! I AM MORE THAN MORTAL! I AM A GOD! MY SOUL CAN BE DESTORYED! MY PYSHICAL FORM CAN ONLY BE MAIMED BUT NOT BROKEN! I CAN REBUILD THIS WORLD WITH MY OWN PERSONAL POWER FOOLS! YOUR EMPEROR IS A ANT TO ME!

I AM SAURON! LORD OF THE RING!

>> No.14041935

>>14041914
Ring's broken, you're fucked. Gotta love that magma and that plasma.

>> No.14041947

>>14041895
Hey.

Who the fuck are you, and what are you doing up here?

>> No.14041954

>>14041895
Fridges? We don't have fridges. We have freeze driers. Liquids are kept... Elsewhere.

>> No.14041959

>>14041796

I actually am not an alien. You see..
Eons ago, a signification portion of humanity left our home galaxy through a--now nonexistent--wormhole. It is only now that we have recovered from our losses and achieved this glorious state of freedom that is the Gallente Federation!

>> No.14041976

>>14041914
You have a soul. That is you need to die.

>> No.14041990 [DELETED] 

>>14041935
Fool, Mount Doom is a place were I place my personal power into, making it into a foundry just for the ring. It was there were it was made, and only there it can be UNmade. You cannot destory the ring, only unmake it.

NOW! Lasguns and flak jackets to the orcs, give the troll whatever it is that Ogryns get, lascannons to the Fellbeasts. WE MARCH ON THE IMPERIUM TODAY! AND TOMORROW, TEEEEERRRRRAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!

>> No.14041991

>>14041959
If you're talking to me, you're in range of my batteries, if you're in range of my batteries, I'm firing.

Don't care what you are traitor. A heretic is what you are, and will ever be. Death is your only redemption. Pray the Emperor forgives your Heresies and taks you into the fold.

>> No.14041994

>>14041912
You guys like freedom too, huh?
What's your position on hedonistic post-scarcity anarcho-socialism?

>> No.14042011

>>14041990
Heat is what destroys the ring, not the place. Go reread the books. Dragon of sufficient power could do it.

Oh, btw, you're adrift on a shard of your former planet, with no atmosphere. Your servants have already suffocated.

>> No.14042012

Dear Gods, somebody Archive this!

>> No.14042023

>>14041994
Well, mine is gun batteries and hate. Culture faggot. Go away and come back when you're advertising something actually good.

DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!

>> No.14042035 [DELETED] 

>>14042011
Well someone didn't read the Silmarillion. I have the power to remake my own damn planet. Well not me but someone, MORGOTH! GET IN HERE! I NEED A NEW PLANET

>> No.14042045

Your all weak and obsolete!
Transhumanity was here long before that ridiculous backwards "dark age of technology," we are truly immortal and none save the Eldar or Necron can match us now!

The only one here that even deserves my notice is that Gallente fellow. At least those pre-transhumans have the since to achieve technological immortality.

As for Chaos, you're pathetic. That warp/demon shit is nothing compared to the bitching Titans, Factors, Exsurgent Virus, and everything else which endlessly assaults our vast armadas within the void between galaxies.

>> No.14042047

>>14041947
I am Shas'ui Ceiling T'au, I was tasked with infiltrating the Imperium and steering as many humans as I can towards the Greater Good. Who might you be?

>> No.14042056

>>14042035
Fortunately, Morgoth is separated from the physical realm. And in jail.

>> No.14042076

>>14042035
Sorry, I stole Morgoth, The Mona Lisa and The concept of crossovers. Catch me if you can.

>> No.14042081 [DELETED] 

>>14042056
Dragor Dagorath, no one nows of this ultimate ace in the hole of Tolkien's bad guys. What if the Dragor Dagorath happened in the 40k. SHIT WILL GO DOWN FASTER THAN HORUS CRYING FOR HIS DADDY! AHAHAHAHAHAA

>> No.14042085

>>14042023
Hello, Ladies. Look at your man, now look at me, I'm a man that your man might smell like if your man smelled like sex and drugs. Now look at my hands, what do you see? My hands are now phased-array CREWS emmiters that are carving your armor off of your body without even singing your flesh. Look away, now look at me again. I AM A SWARM OF BEES! I'm flying down your throat and up your ass, stinging every inch of your flesh again and again with flesh-melting acid!
I'm on a horse.

>> No.14042095

>>14042081
>anything land based whatsoever

Firan'.

>> No.14042107

>>14042085
>I'm a Mary Sue, come look at my bullshit powers and plot armor!

Yeah... okay.

>> No.14042111

>>14042047
I am Ceiling Tau, tasked with eliminating impostors of Ceiling Tau.

Also, hetero-sexual life partner of DOOMRIDER.

>> No.14042120

>>14042107
You took a shot at The Culture.
The Culture shot back.

>> No.14042127

>>14042035
Hey Sauron, just your friendly neighbourhood space elves here. Nothing suspicious about us at all, honest. You can take this planet if you like. There's nothing wrong with it; I assure you that you won't find screaming mounds of body parts in far flung corners of the continents...

Are only request is that your little minions participate in one of our little... er, cultural exchanges...

>> No.14042128

>>14042111
COCAAAAAAAAAAINE FOR SSSSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAURON BABY YAYAYAYAYAYUH!

...wait. Heterosexual?

BABY I DO COCAINE!

NANANANANANANANANA PANSEXUALITY AND COCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINE!

>> No.14042140

>>14042120
The culture is still bullshit. boring contrivedness though.

I'll be in the back, reading Vance. Call me when you got something good.

>> No.14042142

rolled 1 = 1

>>14042111
If violence is what you wish, then so be it.

>> No.14042148 [DELETED] 

>>14042095
BALROGS! DEMONS OF PURE SHADOW AND FLAME! THEY CANNOT BE KILLED UNLESS THEIR FLAMES ARE TAKEN OUT! AND LAST I CHECKED THE IMPERIUM HAS NOTHING THAT ISEN'T FIRE BASED HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

>> No.14042156

>>14042128
Now it's a party. Get the fuck up here and help clear out this cooler.

>> No.14042182 [DELETED] 

>>14042128
Doom Rider what up dude. Bring that shit right here and lets get some CCCCCOOOOOOOOOOCCCCCAAAAIIINNEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>> No.14042191

>>14042140
Vance?

>> No.14042194

>>14042148
No oxygen = no fire. No atmosphere = no oxygen.

Busy blasting your planet apart until it fractures, enjoy.

>> No.14042207

>>14042148

Oh, my...

It would seem that your precious fire as been snuffed out by a nano swarm, so simple that a Transhuman child could make. I have come with my tiny war fleet--comprised of a mere fifty trillion ships--to protect my backwards human cousins.

Sending brofist to the Gallente and Imperium.

>> No.14042222

>>14042191
Jack Vance. If you don't know who fucking Jack Vance is, you are not only a faggot, but also an ignorant, retarded little fanboy with no conception of quality.

Fucking 12 year olds on my /tg/.

>> No.14042233

>>14042156

Mind if I send fifty Alpha forks to join in the fun?

>> No.14042240

>>14042142
Well fuck, should've worn my lucky hat.

>> No.14042245

>>14042207
Those are lovely augmentations you've got there. Are those ferrofluidic hydraulics?

>> No.14042257 [DELETED] 

>>14042194
THEIR FLAME DOSEN'T NEED THE LAWS OF PSYHICS! THEY ARE POWERED BY THE ETERNAL POWER OF THE MAIAR! And besides, You think all just stay on one world, all just go to some human world, make the people worship me, and I can do this all with my MIND! Look up Numenor, yeah.

>> No.14042280

>>14042257
So they're a bunch of lesser daemons? Brb dialing 0-900-Grey-knights

enjoy ze pain.

>> No.14042298

>>14042245

Our technology is far beyond primitive ferrofluidic hydraulics. Though I do use such augmentations in my mountain climbing morphs now and then.

Speaking of augmentations. Is there not a true transhuman faction in this galaxy that call's itself the Adetpus Mechancius? I would very much like to meet one of their leaders and discuss, technological immortality...

>> No.14042335

>>14042240
Ha! Suck on it!

>>14042233
Do they have cocaine? Or bitches? Or cocaine made of bitches?

>> No.14042343

>>14042298
Tech Heresy detected. Opening fire.

>> No.14042356

>>14042298
Yeaaaah. Something tells me you'll be slightly disappointed.
Do me a favor though and keep your nanies to yourself, huh? The last thing I need to day is to get roped into cleaning up some runaway weaponized nanotech.

>> No.14042359

>>14042335

Will emulation software suffice?

>> No.14042367

>>14042335
You have only four digits. You can't make a middle finger insult.

>> No.14042369

I'll fight for whomever gives me tree-fiddy

>> No.14042418

This land is ready for harvest.

Devour all, take the humans for processing.

>> No.14042427

>>14042369
Here.
Follow this Joe character around.
This little silver thingy is called a Knife Missile. Ignore it.

>> No.14042437

>>14042367
Ummmm....from the picture you posted they have 3 fingers and a thumb, and could therefore still flip the bird.

>> No.14042488

>>14042418

The humans are ours for patterning, scum!

>> No.14042496

>>14042437
not properly. Flipping the bird at someone with 4 digits will only make him laugh.

>> No.14042502

>>14042427

Affirmative sir!

>> No.14042532

>>14042502
Wait.
You've never turned anybody into a piece of furniture, have you?

>> No.14042569

>>14042532

Negative sir, I just run people through with my bigass spear!

>> No.14042611

>>14042569
Alright, just checking.

>> No.14042635

>>14042611

There's room for spear stabbing right? Also, who am I stabbing?

>> No.14042677

>>14042635
I'll let you know.
Just follow Joe.

>> No.14042731

>>14042635


God.

>> No.14042756

>>14042731
Well, let's just keep our options open at this point, hey?

>> No.14042827

>>14042756


No. I want him to spear god. Doesn't matter which one.

>> No.14042907

>>14042827
Spear Guy?
You can stab this dude.
He's insane and this little war's already got enough instigators.

>> No.14042986

>>14042907

Boo.

>> No.14042994

>>14042343

*My Ultimate faction battle podmorph (tech priest like cyborg for non EP players)--40,000 years of Transhuman perfection--shrugs off your primitive weapons*

Now, now...

Don't make me disinterested your poorly augmented body with my household nanites.

>> No.14043033

>>14042907

Alrighty, will do sir!

>> No.14043047

>>14042427

He is too human. I will only fight alongside Trasnhuman, posthuman, robot, alien, or AI mercenary's.

>> No.14043052

>>14043033
Good lad.
Have a bonus.

>> No.14043061

>>14043047

Is this more to your liking? Granted, I'd need another tree-fiddy

>> No.14043064

>>14043047
He's my Agent. Is that not enough?

>> No.14043084

>>14043033

A spear? Alright then.

*budda budda budda budda*

>> No.14043120

>>14043064

I guess it will be OK if you give me him proper augmentations as a first payment...

>>14043061

I want both! Give the Dino a cyberbrain so my Infomorph wife can control it.

>> No.14043135

>>14043084
I got so bored waiting for your huge, slow bullets to get close enough to shoot down that I had sex with your gun.
Your gun swallows.

>> No.14043139

SAURON WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?

>> No.14043146

>>14043120
What makes you think I haven't already augmented him?

>> No.14043151

Rand Al Thor the Dragon Reborn is here!

I hope im not to late. Also, Sauron sucks Dark Ones a loser!

>> No.14043154

>>14043120

Can I look like this?

>> No.14043179

>>14043154

Sure. Just make sure you get back up insurance.

>> No.14043185

>>14043135
Hedonist pervert! Slaaneshi cultist!

COME TASTE THE BITE OF MY SWORD!

>> No.14043188

>>14043154
Let's make this simple: I can and will give you anything you want, exactly the way you want it, as long as you remain in my employ. You want to look like that, I can make it happen. Want the cock of a horse and the tits of a young fertility goddess? Done. Just do as your told.
You're my pawn, but you're a ludicrously well-compensated pawn.

>> No.14043198

>>14043185
THE EMPEROR'S LIGHT IS MY TORCH, MY FAITH IS MY SHIELD, MY FURRY IS MY SWORD!

>> No.14043205

>>14043198
>MY FURRY IS MY SWORD
confirmed for heresy.

>> No.14043209

>>14043198
>furry

>> No.14043211

>>14043185
Let me get this straight. You waft her incense around her so she smells amazing, then anoint her with slippery oils, and then you tell me you DON'T want me to fuck her?
Also? Your sword is broken so perfectly that it is literally impossible to repair. Hitting people with it actually makes them a little healthier now.
You're fucking welcome.

>> No.14043212

>>14043205
Goddamn spelling... Need a picture of that, NOW!

>> No.14043221

>>14042343

Oh dear...

I seem to have forgot you for awhile. Now, would you be so kind to stop shooting me with that peashooter and and hot water gun you call a plasma cannon and take me to your magos?

I hope you don't mind my Infomorph wife sending a million beta forks to crack into your systems and mess around with your minds...

>> No.14043234

>>14043211
FILTH! Heretic! Scum! Guns need maintenace. Even Emperor ignorant heretic retards like yourself must know this! They need oil, or they jam.

FAITH AND FIRE! DEATH TO THE HERETICS!

>> No.14043239

>>14043188
Much appreciated sir!

>>14043221
And I'll run you through with my spear!

>> No.14043254

>>14043221
No Mindhacks.
You will have me to contend with if you start fucking with the living minds of other sentient beings.

>> No.14043262

>>14043239
No!
You're not running him through!
You're just following him!

>> No.14043270

>>14043221
++Feel the power of the Omnissiah, arch heretic++

Omnissiah te per, tenebras ducebit.

>> No.14043282

>>14043234
HAHAHA! You have to MAINTAIN your guns? No wonder she's so needy!

>> No.14043285

>>14043262

Damn, that's problematic... I guess I'll just... hang around and not stab anyone...

>> No.14043288

>>14043221
Your filthy psyker tricks won't work on me psyker filth. My faith is to strong.

FEEL THE FIST OF THE EMPEROR!

>> No.14043296

>>14039642
Its time to fuck some heretical shit up

>> No.14043297

>>14043254
>>14043239

Hm...

T'was self defense. Besides it's my wife doing the mindhacks. So...am I to understand that we are now in a neutral relationship with the Adeptus Mechancius? I have yet to meet a Magos for discussions upon technological immortality.

>> No.14043306

>>14043285
Your sphere of interests is pretty stab-centric, isn't it?
What if I told you that I want you to stand behind him and wait for the exact right moment to stab either him or some other as-yet-to-be-determined person? Would that make you happy?

>> No.14043310

>>14043282


... What kind of bullshit setting do you come from? Everything needs maintenance. Whatever your level of technology, it needs to be maintained, everything decays.

What is this bullshit, magic? You're even worse than those culture sues.

>> No.14043324

>>14043297
Here's the Magos: >>14042343

His response is Autocannon fire.

>> No.14043330

>>14043297
I'm in no position to dictate your disposition with the AdMech, I'm just telling you that I won't tolerate meatfucking.

>> No.14043344

>>14043297
"Neutral" is expressing it somewhat lightly.

Advance and destroy, Manipel!

>> No.14043351

>>14043288

Unfortunately for you, I am no psyker. If you wish to attack me prepare for true militarized nanotech swarms. Your petty faith can not halt reality...

>> No.14043356

>>14043306

YeeeeeeSSSSS! I didn't go on a shit-ton of quests to retrieve Gáe Bulg for nothing sir

>> No.14043357

>>14043310
You don't like The Culture?
Then why do you have "Astartes <3 Culture" carved into your armor in 6-inch letters?

>> No.14043367

>>14043351

Pfft, you're in a universe where faith *makes* it real.

The Emperor is my shield! My faith shall hail me through the rain of fire, my belief will break through any armor!

DEATH TO THE ENEMIES OF THE EMPEROR!

>> No.14043374

>>14043330

Understood. I will only unleash Transhuman hell in self defense...

>> No.14043376

>>14043356
>Gáe Bulg
I knew I liked you for some reason.

>> No.14043380

>>14043376

I can even throw it with mah toes!

>> No.14043396

I LOOK FOR EMPIRE BUILDER SOMETIMES SINGING AYYYYYYYO, WHERE'D MAKER GO!?!?

>> No.14043404

>>14043396
Shit. Wrong thread.

>> No.14043408

>>14043310
*snicker*

>> No.14043423

>>14043367

I have been around for 40,000 years. The me you are speaking to is not the only me, I am an alpha fork within this galaxy; the "real," me is so far away from your little galaxy that you could never hope to reach him. As for death...

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

Don't make me laugh mortal!
Your going to have to find every other Alpha fork left here--while the others either fuck up your tech as infomorphs or jump into new morphs--, just try.

Oh and by the way, your Emperor is actually an Exhuman with the Exsurgent Virus.

>> No.14043425

>>14043374
Think of it this way: manually rewriting their brains is grunt work, but subtly manipulating them into doing what you want takes an artist's insight. Also it's more fun!

>> No.14043426

>>14043408
Seriously? No. There's no technobable you can throw at me to convince me there will ever be tech that needs no maintenance whatsoever. You've got to be kidding me. That shit, only with magic.

>> No.14043439

>>14043425

I like where your going with that...

>> No.14043452

>>14043423
While m blood still pumps, while my fists still close, I shall fight the enemies of the Emperor, no matter the cost.

You shall never be victorious, depraved alien. You have no honour, no faith. No... Bravery. HONORIS VICTUS TUTI!

GLORY FOR THE FIRST MAN TO DIE!

>> No.14043455

I don't give a fuck about your beacon. Or your call for aid.

>> No.14043526

>>14043426
That's not why I was laughing.
I'm laughing because you've betrayed your ignorance. You complain about The Culture but you've obviously never read one of the books. You'll write off the whole setting and anyone who likes it without a second thought, but your seat of unapproachable superiority is based on ignorance.
It's not really ironic, but it's funny in the same way.
What's really ironic is that I'm now justified in writing you AND your opinions off completely as a troll.
Suck it.

>> No.14043554

>>14043452
>GLORY FOR THE FIRST MAN TO DIE!
That was a very stupid thing to say.

>> No.14043562

>>14043452

I am no alien! I am Transhuman! I am perfection! Evolution no longer holds slay over my kind! We are the masters of our bodies and our destiny!

We are the new humans and you're the obsolete filth that we left behind so many years ago in our technological apotheosis into godhood.

We have returned from the cold, dark void between galaxies to wipe out those Exsurgent infected freaks you call Chaos..

>> No.14043563

>>14043426
>There's no technobable you can throw at me to convince me there will ever be tech that needs no maintenance whatsoever
Solid-State Components.

>> No.14043582

>>14043526
In what way do I claim superiority? I'll admit 40k is dumb and full of flaws, and further, I have said nothing about anything. Except Jack Vance. Who is superior.

So... How am I claiming superiority? You're doing the same thing as me, dismissing something out of hand without any consideration of the facts. I feel safe to say you're a hypocrite. But then so is every human, including me. So you're not special, I suppose.

>> No.14043584

Looking back through the transmissions, I believe there has been a misunderstanding. I never wanted to stab Joe, just the guy talking to Joe.

Therefore, can I stab someone who isn't Joe?

>> No.14043594

>>14043562
Okay, manipulating lesser beings, lesson one.
DON'T TELL THEM THEY'RE LESSER BEINGS.

>> No.14043620

>>14043582
Fuck me, you really are an idiot aren't you?

>> No.14043626

>>14043562
You betrayed humanity. You have forsaken your race, your true self, your inner being, all for some selfish, materialistic goal. You are scum. You are worse than Xenos or Heretics, for not only have you cast your humanity aside, not only do you claim to be superior because of this, but you see us as inferior. You have nothing, robot. You are a mere parody of us. A creation. A THING.

Death to you, and all your kind. Humanity prevails. The Imperium prevails. Through death and pain, through war and terror shall we prevail. For huanity has bravery and honour. WE. SHALL. PREVAIL!

DEATH TO THE NECRON FUCKER!

>> No.14043627

>>14043594

I am a member of the successors of the Ultimate faction, hubris is what we do best...

>> No.14043643

>>14043584
Fuck yeah, stab this moron: >>14043582

>> No.14043648

>>14043563
Which translates to bullshit. Nothing more complex than a knife can be made out of that. Way to make a superior society.

>> No.14043656

>>14043620


... Maybe. Explain why?

>> No.14043678

>>14043627
So with all that expanded Transhuman capability of yours you didn't see fit to work of self-control?
If you were really as highly evolved as you say, you'd be able to demonstrate some of the virtues inherent in the latter half of your name. It would sicken me to see >>14043626 proven right about you.
No more excuses, you're playing on the Varsity team now.

>> No.14043697

>>14043626
How...amusing...

What of the Adeptus Mechanicus? Are they not the same--deluded with flawed methods and religion but the same nonetheless--? Robot? Robot?! Do not compare me to the TITANS! I use many biomorphs--mainly the Remade 4.0000.

>> No.14043710

>>14043643

Awe yeeeaaaaaahhhh! Will do sir!

>>14043582

Sorry Anon, I'm gonna have to run you through with Gáe Bulg! Then I'll probably have to kill a bunch of other Anons since you're Legion.

Goddamn anons, more of you out there than orcs

>> No.14043716

>>14043656
The only way to win an internet argument is to realize that you've won and ignore your opponent.
So no, I'm not going to point out everything stupid thing you said, because I'm not your fucking teacher and that's not my fucking job.
Your ass is disregarded. I got better wankery to pursue than hammering your stupidity into your head.

>> No.14043749

>>14043697
The Holy Adeptus Mechanicus use Technology as the true manifestation of faith it is. They hope to aspire to the glory days of our ancestors. Every weapon is a holy relic in the service of mankind. Every addition to the body is an act of worship, further proximity to the holy machine. They sacrifice their humanity, their being. for the good of us all. For the good of mankind.

They are nothing like you, Tech Heretic. They do not take to idle use of technology as though it were a tool. They do not use technology to improve themselves for selfish goals. They do it for the holy quest for knowledge, for the salvation and help of us all!

You are nothing. You are a perverse tech heretic, manipulating holy machines for your own perverted reasons. You deserve nothing but Death. You have no hope of salvation.

>> No.14043783

>>14043678

I am only Transhuman. I have ascended in a physical nature only. Aside from being able to exist as an Infomorph, upload/download, and basic self alterations, I am still very much mentally human. I have all the right to think of myself as superior because I can not truly die and I have 100 trillion other me's spread throughout the universe.

If I were to become posthuman, then I would fit your bias assumptions upon what a highly evolved being ought to be. Perhaps one of the other me's is like that, but not I...

>> No.14043789

>>14043716
>The only way to win an internet argument is to realize that you've won and ignore your opponent.

Now THAT is stupid and superiority. "I'm right, you;re wrong, no matter what." That's not how it works. Either you convince the other party, or you come out with a consensus. There is no such thing as "winning" an argument. You might, very rarely, if you are absolutely right, with no way to claim a counter position. But it would be unlikely there were an argument in the first place, if that was the case.
And you call me stupid. Jesus, I've seen a lot in my time, but this... This is wholly unprecedented.

>> No.14043790

Fuck your shit, invaders!

>> No.14043805

>>14043749
If you give me access to one of your corrupted STC machines I'll extract/extrapolate it's contents for you and give you a fully restored machine. All you have to do in return is cease your support of this guy >>14043749 and his compatriots. You don't have to kill them or anything, just don't help them anymore.
I'll consider transmission of the relevant data acceptance of this deal and begin work immediately.

>> No.14043818

>>14043783
That's... actually quiet sad.

>> No.14043835

>>14043789
Do you need me to define "Disregarded" for you?
Not that I'm actually going to.

>> No.14043853

>>14043805
+TRANSMITTING LIKE THE FIST OF THE NORTH STAR+

>> No.14043857

>>14043835
>that statement
>saying he's not superior

Hohohoho! Holy trolling batman!

>> No.14043866

>>14043749

Do keep in mind that my kind--and myself--was here long before your Adeptus Mechanicus existed. I was born on Mars--oh, my lush green home--, I know what I'm talking about!

>> No.14043871

>>14043857
It's PATENTLY obvious that I'm superior to you, knucklehead.

>> No.14043883

>>14043805
You're telling me that, to gain your support, I need to stop supporting myself?

Even your logic is heretical! You have nothing to offer but lies and circular logic! Die scum!

>> No.14043902

>>14043853
Okay then.
I think eveybody who's left is either working for me or with me except for the dude in bulky armor, and I've just cut his lines of resupply and support completely.
I'll accept your surrender now, by the way.

>> No.14043915

>>14043902

Can I stab him?

>> No.14043924

>>14043883
> Implying Ultramarines and AdMech are the same Faction
> laughingservoskulls.tiff

>> No.14043926

>>14043871
>not superior, oh no!
>I'm an arrogant asshole, trolololo

Fuck sake, if you can't see how stupid and arrogant you're being, you're worse than me. You were in the right in the beginning, but now you've gonna all herp. Need some medicine?

>> No.14043927

>>14043818

I've........grown used to it.
Hm...
I wounder what the other me's are doing?

>> No.14043952

>>14043924
>implying I hadn't run out of AdMech pics and used a funny one instead

Sorry, no. You can try to invalidate my argument by grasping at straws, but you'll fail.

>> No.14043962

>>14043926
In the sense that I've been baiting you because watching you rage makes me smile inside, yes. I have been trolling you.
The fact that you still haven't realized that "Disregarded" means "I'm not going to discuss this with you, because YOU AREN'T WORTH MY TIME" only proves my point.

>> No.14043997

>>14043952
>Implying that AdMech wouldn't gleefully fuck the Emperors corpse for a STC.

>> No.14043999

I'm surprised that chaos hasn't summoned a leviathan yet to wreck you're shit imperial slaves.

>> No.14044009

>>14043962


.... Rage? I've only been bemused with your stupidity. I've been far to busy using my passion on Imperial zealotry to waste it on you. I'm only laughing at you.
Also
>implying you're not looking for excuses.

Silly, silly man. It's patently obvious.

>> No.14044018

You expect me to believe you're a tzenchian cultist but can't use "You're" correctly?
I call shenanigans.

>> No.14044029

>>14043962
Oh damn, I forgot

>The fact that you still haven't realized that "Disregarded" means "I'm not going to discuss this with you, because YOU AREN'T WORTH MY TIME" only proves my point.

You just don't know what arrogance and superiority actually mean, is that it? Because... damn, you are being obtuse. Or intentionally stupid. I can't tell.

>> No.14044051

>>14044009
As you say then, buddy.

>> No.14044055

It's a pity to see such a good thread end up like this.

>> No.14044083

>>14044055
Fortunately "Gondor calls for aid" threads seem to be fairly common. Maybe the next one will fair better.

>> No.14044091

I realize I'm a bit late here, but...
>>14043648
Yes, knives are technically solid-state.
You know what else is solid state?
Every smartphone on the market, laser diodes, and literally thousands of other high-tech devices.

>> No.14044098

>>14044018
Tzeentch cultists are known more for planning. As long as you can get the message across It doesn't matter if you can't spell something one time.

>> No.14044104

>>14043749

I have something for you! If your insane red robed transhumans are so obsessed with poor quality outdated technology like STC's, I can provide one for them.

I am making one right now, let's see how loyal they are to you then..

>> No.14044123

>>14044104
I've got that angle covered, bro.
>>14043805

>> No.14044124

>>14044098
Or use it in it's proper format.

>> No.14044154

>>14044104
You offer corrupted technology, hoping to win their hearts? HAH! Only pure STCs, made in the glory days of man, and untouched by corruption, are the true source.

The best you can hope for is that they accept the STC, and then burn you at the cross for your Heresy. And claim it as their own find. They could never allow scum like you to finish the quest for knowledge for them.

>> No.14044192

Alrighty then!
So, in the the typical fashion of The Culture, I've disarmed my opponents with bribery and subterfuge in favor of outright violence. Nobody's in a position to do any real harm anymore.
Not a bad evening's work.
Cuchulain? Joe? What say I recall the E-Dust Assassin & Knife Missiles, and I'll send a Module down for you so you can mix it up with the half million odd people partying inside me, and we'll go see if we can't find some more worthy trouble to apply our prodigious talents to?

>> No.14044193

>>14044123

Roger that...

I just sent a pod morph operated by my betafork that is modified to look like a Tech Priest to a random Forge world for spying.

>> No.14044204

>>14044192

On my way! These weak blank humans are getting tiering..

>> No.14044212

>>14044204
I hear that!

>> No.14044226

Copy. Returning.

>> No.14044240

>>14044192

...

No you haven't. There's a Space Marine tearing at your guts and the Mechanicus is howling for your blood, for your tech Heresy. Whatever the fuck gave you the impression ANYONE was subdued?

Imperator immortalis est, moritur salvum eternae.

>> No.14044273

>>14044192

Affirmative sir!

>> No.14044275

>>14044154
Yawn...

You obsolete humans still can't compreheand the fact that...I...can...NOT...die and that there are 100 trillions--and raising---of me in exsistence.

Your beginning to bore me, I have not been bored in forty millennia.

>> No.14044286

>>14044275

Need me to run 'im through?

>> No.14044287

>>14044240
>Mechanicus is howling for your blood, for your tech Heresy
Actually...
>>14043805
So yeah, big suprise, those AdMech who were actually ACTING like AdMech betrayed the hell out of you, and now we've got enough Dark-Age tech that we're basically invincible.
Sorry, bro.

>> No.14044296

>>14044286
I like you, you're crazy.
We should work together some time.

>> No.14044303

>>14044296

You know the price: tree-fiddy

>> No.14044314

>>14044303
THAT'S OUR CUCHULAIN

>> No.14044315

>>14044287

Look at that post again. Firstly, it's just an offer, and no acceptance was ever voiced, secondly, you link to the same post twice. You are asking me to stop supporting myself, in order to gain your support. Yeah... no.

Also: >Offering Corrupted STCs

Nope, still howling for your blood.

>> No.14044355

>>14044287

Welcome to the real Transhuman club. Come with me, there is a whole universe beyond this galaxy to discover...

inb4: The Necrons are now after both our shinny metal asses.

>> No.14044367

>>14044315
>Firstly, it's just an offer, and no acceptance was ever voiced
ORLY? >>14043853
>secondly, you link to the same post twice
I realize that, but the first link was to indicate that I was responding to your post, and the second was indicative that you were the people I wanted the AdMech to betray.
And seriously, the FabGen went with Horus for TWO STC FRAGMENTS, and I'm offering a fully-restored suite. Even assuming I can't unfuck the corruption inflicted upon it (Protip: I can), they'd still leap at the chance.
So I'll tell you what everybody else in the universe already knows.
DON'T FUCK WITH THE CULTURE.

>> No.14044415

>>14044367
The culture beats 40k. That was established the very first time the culture was mentioned on here. Power levels are hugely different.

Luckily, 40k is better written and more interesting. And that IS saying something. Actually, fucking Marvel comics are better written and have better plot than the Culture. Just as Mary sue, but still.

Take your shit and burn it. Just... fuck off. Read something good.

>> No.14044426

>>14044367

Are there below 100 trillion obsolete humans in this silly Imperium? I think I will start rapidly forking/ship building so I can wipe them out...

>> No.14044436

>>14044275
Only hundreds of trillions? Too bad you're all still losers.

>> No.14044466

>>14044436

Say that 1,000,000,000 years from now.
Oh, wait...
You can't because you will just be ash by then!

>> No.14044524

>>14044415
It was never about which setting is better, fool. It's not
a fucking competion. This thread was just a goddamn fanwank pick-up game. I like 40k, but there was already 40k players so I took The Culture just for the sake of variety!
And let's be clear, I didn't beat you because I'm more powerful. I could have destroyed you all in a heartbeat if I'd wanted. I beat you because I out-manuvered you, which is so in-character for a GSV it's untrue.
That's why The Culture is awesome, which you would know if you'd bothered to READ the books you so happily labeled "Mary Sue". Yes, they're super powerful, but the dangers they face aren't from overwhelming force. Any asshole can hold the line, die bravely for what they believe in. The Culture's strife is subtle, always in gray areas, always with more at hazard than just life. They aren't stories about HUGE SHIPS AND BATTLES OMG. They're about people getting caught in hard places while the try to protect others.
Do yourself a favor and read them.
Also, stop using "Mary Sue". The term has no meaning anymore, it just makes you look like a twit.

>> No.14044627

>>14044524
You "outmaneuvered" me, by claiming you were right and ignoring anything I said in return. Then ignored absolute blind zealotry and the most likely Imperial approach, Then applied your own judgment as absolute truth, and voila. That's not maneuvering. That's bullshit. But very in keeping with the Culture, I'll give you that.

You'd have outmaneuvered me if you had convinced me to surrender to the culture. Which no Imperial ever would. Better dead than at the service of heretics.

I'll bloody well use mary sue if I like. It's close enough to what they are, and I'm not going to waste time typing out that they are ridiculously powerful and win through a lot of contrivance and plot armor, but are not exaggeratedly so, because there are more powerful ones than them every fucking time I want to say what I mean. Mary Sue will suffice.

>> No.14044757

>>14044627
No, I outmanuvered you by consolidating all who would potentially oppose you to my side and stripping you of your ability to make industrialized war. I don't have to convert you, I've NEUTERED you, which is actually better because I don't have to endure your company.
And for somebody who touts how "Well Written" 40k is you're pretty blind to it's realities assuming that no Imperial world would surrender. I shouldn't have to explain why.
As for Mary Sue, it's become a mere epithet, all it means is "A character I don't Like". It doesn't even mean "A Bad Character" anymore. You can't communicate anything meaningful with the term, and by suggesting you stop using it I was just offering good advice.

>> No.14044881

>>14044757
You possibly, maybe convinced some of the AdMech to join you (Likelier, they'd take your STC and kill you, they would NEVER allow a heretic, or anyone but a Techpriest to finish the quest for knowledge, but whatever). You didn't even TRY the Navy, Arbites, Sororitas, Astartes or Guard. And they'll still be supplied for long enough. Also, you forget civilized worlds. They can make the basic stuff. Like... Everything the Guard needs.

Hardly "All who would potentially oppose you". In fact, you're making up bullshit again. I'd like to see you as an actual diplomat IRL. You'd do great! Telling everyone you're right based on nothing but your own conception of what's happening, that'll work.

I didn't say 40k was well written, I actually used it to show how bad the Culture was, and therefore implicating 40k to be bad as well. Reading comprehension eludes you, huh? Regardless, yes, planets would surrender, everything is possible, etc. I was generalizing. MOST people in 40k would rather suicide bomb you than join you, is what I'm trying to say. You completely disregard the existing mentality in the Imperium.

Saying Mary Sue is easier then re-writing your point every sentence. If you have an alternative, I'd be more than happy to use that instead.
>good advice
That's your opinion, not a fact.

>> No.14044898

You know what?

I am actually missing those obsolete Imperial humans...

Come back to me! I want to keep showing off how awesome I am and laugh at you as I comeback with a new morph after you think you "killed," me. Come back!

>> No.14044917

>>14044275
>I cannot die.
>>14044898
>You're all obsolete, I'll outlast you all!

Ohey there.

>> No.14044968

>>14044917

Hm...

How many years do I have until the Universe goes out?

>> No.14044980

>>14044968
Less then you'd like.

>> No.14044996

>>14044881
I simply refuse to go through this point by point, I don't the energy, and you've completely failed to engage me as a debate partner.
I'm taking E-Dust's lead on this one.
Ta.

>> No.14045045

>>14044980

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!

Everyone I met is now dead!

I just have me! All googolplex (the number) me!

Fuck!

Quick all other me's! WE NEED TO FIND OUT HOW TO ENTER ANOTHER UNIVERSE NOW!

Chaos are you there? Tzeentch you like immortals don't you?!

>> No.14045053

>>14044996
>when confronted with my bullshit, I'll run, like the other idiot who couldn't argue to save his life!

Really? Come on man, All I'm doing is pointing out your own fallacious logic. You're doing outmaneuvering wrong. Don't want to argue that? Fine. But then don't claim it. And try some more psychology next time, it's kinds vital in manipulating. You chose to see your own interpretation as the one that would happen. Doesn't work that way.

Well... Bye then. Sorry to see you go. Had fun arguing.

>> No.14045090

>>14045053

Dam! You people are taking role playing too seriously!

>> No.14045091

>>14045045
Sorry friend, that's just the way it goes.

>> No.14045120

>>14045091

No way!
I will not die! I can not die! I've killed too many people, shed away too much of my "humanity," existed too long to die! I REFUSE! I REFUSE!

I.........CAN......WILL.....NOT......DIEEEEEEE!

>> No.14045147

>>14045120
Fear of death is the root of all evil in humanity. I've said it before, and will say it again. Accept you will die one day, and you'll be lots happier.

See this guy? In his fear of death, he has cast everything good in his life aside and became a monster.


Cheer up Anon. Death is inevitable. We all die. It ain't so bad. Haven't you gotten bored of existence yet? The same old routines, nothing new? Don't you crave the unknown? Death is your chance.

>> No.14045265

>>14045147

I have already experienced death! The original died when he thought he was becoming transhuman. I am just the copy of an endless line of copies! As software, I do not fear the death of one's current self and the birth of one's other self.

But...

This is different. All of us are going to die! Until now this mind would continue on in a new form...

But now there can be no new form!

I can not let this end! This mind, this personality, these memories. Oh, the memories! Everything I've done, everything I am/was will be gone.....like tears......in the rain.

>> No.14045310

>>14045265
Then you are a copy, and not actually real. You are merely a copy of a man's ideas and sentiments at his moment of death, and all your experiences and ideas have merely been dreams and delusions.

Sorry anon. You're a clone. You have never truly lived, therefore you cannot truly die. All I can offer you is the ceasing of existence. Which is close, and enough comfort, but not the same.

DON'T YOU DARE QUOTING BLADE RUNNER ON ME, ESPECIALLY NOT ONE OF MY COUNTRYMEN, YOU DISGUSTING HEDONIST< TRANSHUMANIST FILTH! If you think that character defended transhumanism you are INCREDIBLY DENSE!

>> No.14045333

Chaos gods! Help I will serve thee! All of us will maintain the warp for you when the material universe snuffs out. I shall not die!

>> No.14045379

>>14045333
No little one, you will die. For it amuses me, and you have no soul to offer me. Your squealing and pleading are funny, but tiresome. Go on and die now. Nurgle would be happy.

>> No.14045387

ಠ_ಠ

You people really don't know how to role play. Role play. As in playing in a role, something that's not you, does not think like you, and is separate from yourself.

fail.

>> No.14045433

>>14045379

*Actually crying*
Why?! I don't want this, I don't want this, I don't w-*Critical error*

>> No.14045451

>>14045387
We don't? Please, do read more of the thread. I think you missed the Imperial zealot, the culture moron, and the Chaos admiral.

We're at the stage where we're trying to make sense out of it now. And the one guy left trying to roleplay is an idiot anyway, not worth the effort. "he's immortal and ubeatable" what incentive is there for me to roleplay?

>> No.14045483

>>14045433
Pff, I tire of this. Bye little one, enjoy the untold horrors the warp has waiting for you. You will... Appreciate... Humanity more, afterward. Hah, just kidding! You like eternity and existence so much, I will snuff out your very soul, and destroy you completley. You will experience nothing more.

>> No.14045581

It is a great day to be elected! The horror stories of the 51'st presidents war against the Imperium is long past! We are free from such a horrifying galaxy again!

Rejoice my people! As your 100th president, I will invoke a new age of peace and prosperity. For the grand majority of the Tau have left their home galaxy to join our Federation.
Liberty for all!

>> No.14048300

Everyone I know is dead...

>>
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