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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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[ERROR] No.12370120 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

I'm hungry, very little in the fridge. Also, despite being paid today, I only have $25 after bills. My food stamps get in tomorrow. Should I go get fast food?
And to make it relevant, Techpriest thread. Because everyone loves those and I have plenty of them.

>> No.12370133

>> No.12370137

Buy actual groceries.

>> No.12370142

Kill your neighbor's cat and eat that instead, you'll be less likely to catch a disease.

>> No.12370145

Nah mon.
Go get a can of chili, and a pack of ramen.
Discard spices, boil noodles, heat chili.
Combine.
Gorge to satisfaction, save rest for later.

>> No.12370147

Buy ramen in bulk.

This is a way to eat it and not get sick of it too fast.

I've had to fast before. Live off water, and cheap stuff.

>> No.12370157

do Techpriest reproduce or do they only recruit?

>> No.12370162

>>12370145
You know... being a college student of 3 years, it's gotten to the point were the SMELL of Ramen makes me queezy.
>>12370137
I will tomorrow, with my food stamps.

>> No.12370164

>>12370157
only recruit.
And the 5% of their remaining body is NOT what you think it is... (it's their spleen).

>> No.12370165

>>12370157
Both. Depends on the world.

There's laymen who just live lives out on forgeworlds, and then there's every single way of recruiting you can think of.

Fuck me, I'm so bored. Ask shit about cogboys itt.

>> No.12370175

>>12370157
Only very low-level priests have the parts needed to still reproduce.

>> No.12370176

>>12370157
No, they reproduce all right.

>> No.12370179

Also tell us what's in your fridge.

Do some TACTICAL ACCOUNTING of the contents.

>> No.12370182

>>12370176
ENTIRE ADMECH HAS BABIES!

>> No.12370187

>>12370162
How about buying a steak then? Cook something nice.

>> No.12370205

>>12370182
little packs of the things, running around, counting wires and singing didactic songs and worrying servo skulls.

>> No.12370209

>>12370179
My Roomie's beer, milk, and fruit.
Water, condiments, bacon, butter, and sandwich meat. Yeah I COULD make a roast beef sandwich., but we don't have any cheese.
Found a carrot though!

>> No.12370212

>>12370162
Nah mon.
Doesn't smell or taste like ramen without the powder.
It's super oorah chili.
Make you wanna romp some tangos.

>> No.12370229

>>12370209
Make a fruit salad? No meat makes this hard.

>> No.12370233

>>12370212
Are... are you speaking Australian?
>>12370205
Ain't she cute?

>> No.12370244

>>12370212
What the shit?

>> No.12370245

>>12370233
cute as a button. And they're smaller, so you can shove them into vents easier than grown-up techpriests but they're cleverer than ephemera and/or servitors. Win-win!

>> No.12370248

>>12370229
There's the bacon. Hey wait a tick... I have a pound of beef in the freezer... but it's also 1AM.
And the fruit is just apples. I'm a Red Delicious guy, but a... whatever those are.

>> No.12370263

They grow up so fast...

>> No.12370277

>>12370137
This. Take that money you'd spend on a large combo meal at McDonald's & buy a loaf of bread & some lunch meat.

>> No.12370278

>>12370244
What?
S'real. T'ain't a bad snack either.

>>12370233
Ah, nah. Not at all. Focus on the items of import: full stomach, possibly less then $1 in cost (.25c ramen, .~70c chili).

>> No.12370280

>>12370248
Microwave that shit, broski. Or at least get a bowl, put the frozen meat (in package!) in it, and put it under warm running water. That'll thaw the bitch out.

Then you can season and fry that shit up. Cook the apples in a pan with some butter and brown sugar on one side and the carrot on the other as a veggie. BAM. fa/tg/uy dinner.

>> No.12370307

How has this pic not been posted yet?

>> No.12370317

>>12370307
Laziness.

>> No.12370318

>>12370233
Nah man, that's Army. Well, one is army, the other's marines.

>> No.12370321

>>12370209

You're complaining about lack of food and yet have both sandwich meat and bacon. Yeah. Here's a tip. Put in your mouth and chew on that shit. It's called eating.

(However you should probably cook the bacon first.)

If you're hungry, and there's food, fucking eat it and shut up. What the fuck? I have a friend like this, bitches about how she's starving but then you look in her fridge and oh look food. "But I don't have cheese." Fuck you.

>> No.12370331

>>12370280
Well the apples are my roomie's, not mine.
I wonder what's in the spice cabinet... And if I can manage to NOT fuck it up this time...

>> No.12370332

Damnit OP, you have perfectly good food in the fridge. Eat it. This shouldn't have even been a question.

>> No.12370351

>>12370321
>>12370332
You're talking to the guy who managed to fuck up FRENCH TOAST and PANCAKES, WITH PANCAKE MIX!
I suck at kitchens.

>> No.12370355

>>12370280
I'm...I'm not getting misty.
=S
It's just smoky in here.

>> No.12370366

>>12370351
How in the everliving fuck do you manage that?

Were you drunk, at least?

>> No.12370369

Why do little girls make such adorable techprists?

>> No.12370380

>>12370351
When in doubt, cook with lower heat then normal -slightly lower, like 10%.
and THIN YOUR PAINTS.

Sorry.
I mean WATCH YOUR COOKING.
Do NOT go off and game, or read anywhere but right next to the stove.
Discipline is part of cooking if you fuck things up normally.

>> No.12370384

>>12370212

They ... they trademarked "hooah"? It's just a sound. It's not a word at all. I don't even

>> No.12370399

>>12370366
Nope. Stone cold sober.
As for the French Toast, fist my eggs were frozen. Then I added too much milk. On top of that, my bread was too thin and I soaked it too long. They fell apart on the trip from pan to plate. I had a soggy mass that tasted like eggs
As for the Pancakes, I added too much mix to the pan. When one side was bubbling, instead of the other being "golden brown" it was "burnt black."

>> No.12370401

>>12370380
Yes! This! Don't be like my relatives and cook on HIGHEST HEAT HOOAH. All you need is the flame touching the pan for high heat, I swear to the Omnissiah.

You can steam the carrots- do you have a ricemaker

>> No.12370409

>>12370369
because they still have so much weak flesh?

>> No.12370413

>>12370380
I'm never more then three feet from the stove.
I just... kinda suck.
/ck/ ridiculed me mercilessly.

>> No.12370438

>>12370399
how the fuck were your eggs frozen?! how can you soak them too long?! SQUAD BROKEN.

You dunk-dunk-dunk the bread and toss that shit in, you don't SOAK it.

The pancake one is understandable, though. I done that.

I say this, as I eat a bowl of home-made gumbo. That's right.

>> No.12370441

>>12370401
Of course I do, I'm in college! Speaking of which...
OH HELL YES I FOUND WHERE HE HID THE CANS OF STEW! AND I found our rice!
Greedy bastard has been holding out on me!

>> No.12370446

>>12370369
No love for manly chin tech-priest here?

>> No.12370455

>>12370441
VICTORY. Eat the shit out that stew.

And remember: Your steamer is a ghetto little veggie steamer. Toss veggies and water in and watch the fucking magic. Carrots taste sweeter when steamed!

Anyway, back to cogboys.

>> No.12370459

>>12370438
Lotta...neophytes mistake Colder Crisper for Superior, and max that shit out instead of just maintaining a solid medium cold.
I did it. Once.

>> No.12370462

>>12370438
I guess I had them too far in the back of the fridge, near the cooler.
And... well using one egg and some milk made me only 2 pieces of french toast, (the second piece having dry spots on it) that's how long I let them soak.

>> No.12370466

>>12370446
I like the manly chin, but I think his headplate is dumb.

That's right. DWI.

>> No.12370485

>>12370441
Hey, HEY!
Guess what you can do? Put 2/3rds a cup of rice int he cooker, and then poor the stew inside with it instead of water. DO IT! IT'S GREAT!

>> No.12370490

>>12370485
STEW RICE BEST RICE

>> No.12370534

>>12370485
>>12370490
So... Beef and Barley of Chicken Chowder?

>> No.12370545

>>12370534
Beef n' Barley.

>> No.12370568

>>12370545
There is an irony here somewhere in the AdMech person advising someone else on food.

>> No.12370599

All this girly admech art makes my heart all warm and fuzzy

:)

>> No.12370608

>>12370545
>>12370568
YOU WERE A MAN ONCE! A MAN!

>> No.12370620

>>12370608
FUCK YOU MY JAW WAS REMOVED WHEN I WAS 16

I'M OLD AS SHIT NOW I DON'T REMEMBER JACK-SHIT ABOUT FOOD

only that I miss it ;~;

>> No.12370638

While on the subject of food...
I like Screwdrivers, and I have orange juice... but no vodka. Can I substitute the vodka for TERRIBLE whiskey? or will it cause vomiting?
>>12370599
I do my best.

>> No.12370641

Rin get's a hand

>> No.12370651

>>12370620
A BOY! YOU WERE A REAL BOY!

>> No.12370656

>>12370638

no.

oh god no.

never do that.

gin is the only substitute which creates something vaguelly drinkable.

>> No.12370673

>>12370651
THEY CUT OUT THE PART OF MY BRAIN THAT REMEMBERS WHAT FOOD TASTES LIKE.

I can't even smell I have only a spectrometer crammed into my nasal cavities :(

>> No.12370701

But yeah basically you normally don't take any techpriest's advice on food because he probably just has a blender on his insides instead of guts.

>> No.12370703

OP: Go and buy some potatoes, they're cheap, and make some BACON CAKES.

You cook the potatoes, mash the crap out of them, and lightly fry the bacon.You then mix the bacon into the mashed potato, and make little patties out of it. A little less than an inch think is best. Then you fry them on both sides. Voila, meaty, filling, tastes awesome, and it's dead cheap.

>> No.12370719

>>12370656
All I have is TERRIBLE whiskey. I mean AWFUL. I could maybe drink it with coke, but I have none.

>> No.12370729

Let's go round up them servo-cattle there partner!

>> No.12370748

It appears the barley has absorbed all the liquid, leaving the rice... crunchy. I'm going to ad a bit of water and try the COOK setting again.
>>12370703
I'm not allowed to have potatoes anymore. When we first moved in, in December, I got a bad...
2 months ago I finally threw them out.

>> No.12370752

if anyone has the picture of the guardsmen riding on a techpriest shooting his lazgun pleas post it.it was from my game i was the priest but i didn't get to save it from the draw thread.

>> No.12370762

>>12370719
I've been told Koolaid might be acceptable.

I WOULDN'T KNOW. I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST DRINK.

>> No.12370767

>>12370748
*I got a BAG
I wonder what would happen if I added a slice of bacon to this...

>> No.12370779

>>12370767
STRIP OF BACON ADDED!

>> No.12370782

>>12370779
Bacon is almost always a safe choice.

>> No.12370795

I live in Alaska. Today I checked my bank account and I had an extra 1300 dollars. I'm trying to decide whether to start playing Warhammer or commission drawfags.

>> No.12370803

>>12370795
Stupid Alaskans, getting paid to live in Alaska...

>> No.12370815

>>12370795
Oh, this was me when I checked my bank account. Dividend rocks!

>> No.12370819

>> No.12370828

>>12370803
Counterpoint: He lives in fucking Alaska. I've been there.

>> No.12370836

>>12370795
Or you could hang on to it and have more when you actually need it.

P.S. I don't have it, but if I did, I'd post the "fucking poorfags" reaction image at you. You've got that spending attitude that perpetuates your own poverty.

>> No.12370843

>>12370828
And there ain't shit there except snow, smelly fish-processing plants, and people who live in Alaska.

>> No.12370846

>>12370828
I watch Deadliest Catch, it's not that bad.
No, I'm kidding. I don't have cable.

>> No.12370854

>>12370846
I admit, I was staying in Kodiak.

The one stoplight they had was broken and blinking.

>> No.12370856

>>12370828
That's why we have the internet!

But then the fucking cable company is trying to ruin that. Fucking barbaric bandwidth limits.

>> No.12370857

>>12370795
Use a couple hundred to start up a small 40K army, save the rest.
>>12370843
And some oil.

>> No.12370897

>>12370857
A piss in the ocean's worth of oil. There's not enough there to make it worth it to drill the place out.

>> No.12370904

So I've had to pop the rice cooker open and add water a few times. The rice is all... crunchy.

>> No.12370916

>>12370904
Well you can either keep adding water (add more than you're doing) or eat around the rice.

>> No.12370969

Oh good God! Thank you all, so much girly admech!

There is something about a beautiful form, which is somehow...more beautiful, because she has the perfect synthesis of flesh and machine.

I love you /tg/

>> No.12371000

>>12370916
I added water something like 3 times. Got it right now. MOST of the rice is soft and fluffy.
>>12370969
Not a problem. A good portion of my Techpriest folder is Techpriestess.

>> No.12371017

>>12371000
Wonderful.

>>12370969
Find me some fine techpriest men and I will gladly agree with thee. I'm kinda worn out on pretty techpriestesses.

>> No.12371053

>>12371017
What are you, gay?

>> No.12371078

>>12371053
Venerates

>> No.12371083

So... is that Dadpriest gone? Because if he is...

>> No.12371097

>>12371053
Close.

>> No.12371146

>>12371097
What are you, NOT gay?

>> No.12371155

>>12371146
Or perhaps, the son of a gay man and a straight man. Making them Half-gay

>> No.12371193

>>12371155
Don't knwo if it works like that...
OH HEY! I just found another pocket of girly-mech.

>> No.12371209

>> No.12371226

>>12370120

You should be able to buy a huge several kilo bag of rice that will last for an entire year.

Won't be that much. Easy to cook too.

1. Fill up mug/bowl with the rice you want, put in pot.
2. Fill up same mug/bowl with the same amount of water as the rice, plus 50% more, pour in.
3. Heat with a lid (or in a pressure cooker) until it steams, then turn off the heat and leave rice.

Should be cooker perfectly after a few minutes of cooling down. Goes with fucking everything.

>> No.12371227

>>12371155
There is the faint chance that I am female, of course.

>> No.12371229

>>12371193
I understand what you mean. Why would they even be attracted to each other.

I figured it just works like half-elves, and the human raped the gay man

>> No.12371230

>> No.12371240

>>12371227
So you're NOT gay then... Huh, I just automatically assume everyone on 4chan is male until told otherwise.

>> No.12371243

>>12371227
The daughter of a straight man and gay man?

I don't think it works like that. You can't get a woman from two men.

>> No.12371249

>> No.12371256

>>12371243
   X   Y
X|XX|XY
Y|XY|YY

>> No.12371257

>>12371243

>> No.12371269

>>12371256
Psh. You and your science.

Next you'll be telling me that two half-elves can have a full human or full elf child.

>> No.12371271

CEI does strangely adorable work. I just wish they would get completed. But you cant; complain about free good art.

>> No.12371288

>>12371269
Ultrakitty :3

>> No.12371292

Alright, just about all the rest of my techpriestesses have exposed tits, and we can't show that on a blue board.

>> No.12371315

>> No.12371600

>>12371292
Megaupload it.

The one deemed shitty drawfag did this for me.

>> No.12371661

>>12371271
It has a charm while sketchy I think it would loose as a finished piece.

>> No.12371665

>> No.12371682

>>12371665
I lol'd...

>> No.12372276

bamp

>> No.12372315

>>12371665
I chortled.

>> No.12372334

>>12372315
malus? why would you have a skull with the word apple in latin?

>> No.12372335

>>12371226
Oh man... I had the "good fortune" to be so poor that I only had enough monies to eat rice and drink water for half a year.
It. Was. Not. Fun.
Now icecream every day! \o/

>> No.12372356

>>12372334
That's "Malum". Malus = Evil.

>> No.12372370

>> No.12372385

>>12372356
Actually, 'malus' would be 'evil one'.
Fitting.

>> No.12372391

>>12372334
iServitor?

>> No.12372393

>>12370455
Someone replay XS's littlest tech priestess story please.

>> No.12372432

>>12372334

It means both.

And now you know why depictions of "Eve and the Snake" involve an apple, when all the text actually says is "fruit".

>> No.12373770

Injecting life into awesome thread. Live.

>> No.12373974

Bampu

>> No.12377248

>> No.12377325

>>12372393
"No. Do it again. If you did it right there wouldn't be any parts left over."
While his voice was patient, there was an implacable, flat tone to it that told Boba that she was going to be at this for a long time. Her father stood up as the door chimed. She followed him to the door, and looked up at the sandy haired man in the plain brown robes. They spoke in Galactic, and she immediately ignored them, her eyes drifting down to look at the odd device strapped to the man's belt.
When her father shut the door, he opened the closet and began putting on the powered armor within. "I have to go take care of something," he said calmly. "I will be back soon." She looked at him without saying anything as his hand rested on her curly hair for a moment, then he was gone.
Boba walked back to the low table and knelt to pick up the reassembled blaster. It was smaller than standard, designed specifically for her, but it was otherwise precisely the same. She began disassembling it, carefully setting each piece down. She had no idea how she'd managed to put it together without whatever that extra part was. She was certain she'd catalogued it all properly....

The beep of the door caused her to turn and look at it curiously. The aliens she and her father lived among did not visit without specifically arranging a meeting first. She didn't think it was the sandy haired man again; she suspected her father was going to disintegrate him. He'd made her nervous.

>> No.12377331

>>12377325
She walked over to her bed and picked up a small but lethal device and then moved towards the door. When it slid open she blinked rapidly.

"See! I told you it would work!"

The bright, cheerful voice of the little girl in the doorway was directed to a large, ominous looking assassin droid. At least, Boba THOUGHT it was an assassin droid. It looked like someone had spent a great deal of effort putting someone into a cybernetic body and hadn't been entirely successful. A small servo-droid shaped like a skull floated aimlessly about behind the red headed girl.
The girl started into the room and then halted, blinking her remaining eye at the sight before her. Boba raised the blaster a little higher, making it very clear that she would not hesitate to shoot.

The girl's right eye - covered by a cybernetic monocle and glowing vibrantly as it assessed the threat the weapon represented - flickered. She waved her right hand - a simple servo-claw, rather than a more advanced prosthetic - and smiled cheerily under the red cowl of her cloak. "Hi! I didn't expect anyone to be here!" Boba blinked quickly, taken aback by the carefree tone the girl took with her. The bright red hair, done in a pair of ponytails, bounced as she looked around. "Oh....I guess this isn't the spare equipment room." Her servo-drone floated by and Boba eyed it warily, though her gun did not waver. "Would you know where that is?"

>> No.12377335

>>12377331
Boba slowly shook her head. The tall....whatever it was loomed over them, but there was a distinct lack of menace from it. She risked a longer look at it, and then looked at the girl. She slowly lowered the weapon, deciding this girl wasn't exactly a threat to her. Or, if she was, she was completely insane and could be dealt with easily. "No," she said softly, her voice rough from disuse.

"Oh, that's too bad. You wanna come help us find it? I'm sure it's around here somewhere...." She glanced at the table behind Boba and her eye lit up with glee. "Oooohhhh, an E-7 style light blaster! And resized too!" Boba took a quick step back as the girl rushed past her to examine the partially dismantled weapon.
The tall assassin droid made a low moaning sound, and Boba looked up at it. It was clearly functioning on less than a full set of AI codes. The whirring of servos and the soft clicking of metal drew her attention back to the girl, who had completely dismantled the gun. And its power supply. A device on her back was assisting the girl, one servo arm flickering as it las-welded the parts back together, the other manipulating multiple pieces of the blaster as she restored it to its original form. The smaller servo-drone hovered about, making curious beeping noises.

"Oh, don't be silly, that would never do. We don't want to burn out the power pack; see, it's self regenerating...." Boba walked over and studied the gun. It was being put back together and there was a single piece missing. She pointed at it.

"Oh, that's an extra part. I don't know what it was doing on the table." The red-cloaked girl wriggled and then looked up at Boba. "See, good as new! Hey, is there a bathroom in here?"

>> No.12377341

>>12377335
Boba took the gun and studied it, looking it over carefully. Not a piece out of place, and no markings to indicate it had been put together by a girl her own age that wasn't her. She glanced at the extra piece, and sighed. Then she walked over the water closet and thumbed open the door. It slid back, revealing the small cubicle.

"Oh, great! Thanks!" The girl walked into the room, and without bothering to close the door used her extra servo arms to slide her panties off, and then hopped up onto the latrine. Boba watched curiously. The servo drone wandered by and she pulled her head out of the way, tempted to shoot the thing. Just in case. The girl hummed as she relieved herself, and Boba looked back, feeling a little funny about watching her, yet unable to bring herself to walk away.
The girl hummed merrily as she did her business, completely at ease as Boba watched her. She looked much the same as Boba did herself down there, though her skin was oddly pale. Boba idly wondered if she would enjoy being touched there too, but the girl interrupted her reverie. "Oh, hey, you wouldn't happen to have any high oil or meta-lubricant powder, would you?" Boba blinked, taken aback by the strange question. "I noticed that guy with the powered armor came from around this section of the city, and I thought he might live around here."

"That is my father." Boba watched as the servo-drone moved closer to the weird girl, who lifted her skirt up even higher so the drone could extend a long glassine tube from under its chassis. It produced a jet of water and washed its owner clean, and she giggled, her cheeks pinkening as she was rinsed. Boba felt her own cheeks heating as she observed and decided she might try that next time she bathed alone.

>> No.12377348

>>12377341
"Well, that's all right," the girl suggested as she used her human hand to gently pat herself dry. "I'm sure we can find it somewhere around here." She slid off of the latrine and straightened her cloak and skirt, and then worked at pulling her panties back up.
Still blushing Boba walked back into the living room, where the tall assassin....whatever it was stood, making soft moaning grunts to itself and looking at the walls. Depositing her heavier blaster in its holster and closing the case, she tucked the smaller one into her belt and took out several other small, lethal devices. She then wandered over to the communications system, the strange red-head following her.

"Whatcha doing?" The servo-drone beeped inquisitively as well. "Oh hush, she's just fine." Boba looked at the girl and blinked; the girl grinned. "You're cute!"

Not quite sure why the comment made her feel so uncomfortable, Boba frowned and turned back to the comm unit. She touched several keys and then studied the maps that her simple actions had brought up. The shadow that fell across the table made Boba look up, and the assassin-droid-thing was looming over her, making its weird moans.

"OH! I don't know why we didn't think of this before! How cool!" the other girl pushed next to Boba, her cloak warm and the whir of her mechanical arm loud as she touched the keys, which brought up more maps. "This is GREAT!" She turned and went to grab Boba.

The gun pressed against her forehead made the little girl go cross-eyed trying to look at it, and the little servo-drone squeaked excitedly and extended a very wicked looking pair of devices from underneath. The large android groaned, but the girl seemed only mildly confused.

>> No.12377366

>>12377348
"Isn't that a personal K-22 miniblaster with a modified targeting sight on it?" she asked, curious. Boba blinked and slowly lowered the gun, convinced this girl, though utterly insane, didn't actually mean her any harm. Boba put the pistol away and looked at the girl. "It is, right? Yeah, those things are great. I added one to my other arm a few months ago, and let me tell you, it was the easiest thing."

Shaking her head Boba started to move towards the door, only to find herself accosted by something far faster than she was. The large assassin droid had grabbed and lifted her by her shoulders to eye height and groaned. "Nonono! Put her down right this instant you!" The girl kicked the assassin droid, and Boba twitched her left hand, a sonic stiletto dropping into it. She didn't immediately activate it; this droid or android or whatever it was could have been programmed to deal with threats the way her father had taught her.

The thing squeezed and suddenly Boba found herself struggling to breathe. She dimly heard the girl shouting orders and the sound of soft shoes kicking hardened ceramic-steel, and then she was on the ground, her head filled with cotton and her vision grayed out. The girl was kneeling over her, and patting her cheek softly.

"Gees, are you okay? I'm sorry! She just doesn't know what she's doing sometimes. I was worried!" Boba blinked slowly and then froze with soft warm lips pressed against hers.

The girl was kissing her.
Clueless, Boba stayed very still, the soft, slightly damp lips gently moving against her mouth. She parted her lips and was shocked to find her mouth being invaded by a warm, wet tongue. She made some kind of noise, and the tongue slipped away.

>> No.12377371

>>12377366
Already dizzy, Boba slowly sat up, licking her lips. The girl was sitting up too, now, her anxious face pale and her cheeks flushed. "I was REALLY worried! I'm glad you're okay!" Boba turned to look at the girl, her stomach filled with flowerbugs and strange tingles running through her privates. The girl leaned closer and Boba didn't immediately draw away. "Are you okay?"

Unsure how to answer, Boba simply nodded. "Oh good! I'm really glad!" The girl smiled and grabbed Boba, hugging her, pressing her mostly soft body against the firm, warm body of the other girl. Boba felt heat crawl up her body, and she licked her lips again. She felt some kind of reciprocation was called for, but wasn't sure what sort was appropriate. So she did what she knew felt good to her to the other girl.

The girl gasped softly, but she only jerked a little as Boba pressed her hand firmly along the soft cloth covering the other girl's pubis. She pressed firmly once, twice, and a third time and was rewarded with a soft moan and a push of rounded hips. The girl's embrace tightened and then fell away, and Boba leaned back, rubbing her fingertips together. The girl had become a little damp as her hand had rested there, and it was strange to realize it happened with other girls.
The girl slowly rose. "That was...uh...thanks for allll your help!" She straightened her skirt nervously, And Boba stood up too, looking at the girl with the same cool, incurious expression she'd worn since the other girl had arrived. "It was REALLY nice to meet you. If you ever need anything specially made, or just...well....you know..." The girl lifted her spread index and middle finger and flicked her tongue between them, causing Boba to blink and tilt her head in confusion. The girl paused and looked at Boba. "Haven't you ever....I mean..." Boba stared at the girl.

>> No.12377376

>>12377371
The tiny servo-drone beeped several times and the girl rubbed her head with her mechanical pincer. "Yeah, I guess so!" She leaned in and kissed Boba again, firmly pressing her lip's to the other girls. Boba's lips softened, parted, and she tried to respond in kind. The awkward kiss was broken and the girl smiled at Boba Fett. "I'll see you around. I promise."

Boba watched the girl and her bizarre entourage exit much as they'd entered, with the incessant, inane babble and the quiet whirring of servomotors. Boba stared at the door for some time, confused and feeling strangely empty.

Her father, she decided, was overdue. She sighed, and collected the things she was never supposed to leave the room without, and found tucked into her pocket a small data crystal, with a hologram of the skull motif that the assassin-thing had worn. Rubbing it thoughtfully, she tucked it into a pocket, and decided she wouldn't mention the incident to her father.
~End, part one~

>> No.12377377

>>12377341
>>12377348
>way too much information about a little girl peeing
oh what the fuck is this

>> No.12377420

>>12377377
Consider yourself lucky. Does anyone want the Blaster Fiasco?

>> No.12377424

Any of you guys want to see a magic trick

>> No.12378108

>>12377377
Is it sad that my concern was that the servitor didn't have a proper mechanism for drying after it sprays with water? Because that was my concern.

>> No.12378120

>>12377376
>~End, part one~
I don't suppose there's a Part Two available?

>> No.12378146

>>12377377
It amuses me that that's what you have a problem with, and not the lesbianism that appears later.

>> No.12378247

>>12378146
why would I care about the lesbians?

>> No.12378283

>>12378120
It's from Xiombarg's story collection, so I suspect so.

>> No.12378524

>>12378120
Part is this:
>>12377420

>> No.12379710

>>12377420
I DO I DO I DO!

>> No.12379840

>>12377420
I remember the Baster Fiasco... but I don;t remember reading it...

>> No.12379853

>>12370120

not much in my pocket either

would take you with for 12:30 am breakfast at 24h diner though, anon. swap tales over pancakes?

>> No.12379936

>this thread

>> No.12380015

Techpriest thread?

Aw yeah, techpriest thread.

>> No.12380023

>> No.12380028

>>12379853
Only if you promise to use a fork

>> No.12380031

>> No.12380034

This fucking picture, man.


Also what, Capt Rhodes is female? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS
I TRUSTED YOU

>> No.12380051

>> No.12380061

>>12380034
Well, I'm female, but the character of Rhodes is definitely male.

If that makes sense.

>> No.12380062

>> No.12380078

Anyway, you know, I still have a formspring. AdmechRhodes on there. It's pretty cool.

>> No.12380082

>>12380061
Haha, it was just a shock, man... chick. I just assume everyone is male on /tg/. Dunno why, considering I'm a ca/tg/irl as well haha

>> No.12380096

>>12380082
I get that a lot.

>> No.12380099

NOOOO! The line of Girly-Mech has been broken!

>> No.12380104

I steal about 50-60 bucks worth of groceries a week. Go into store, grab a hand basket and some plastic bags, shop normally, then put items in bags while looking at magazine in an empty register, then walk out. No one will notice or give a fuck.

>> No.12380111

>>12380099
sorry bro

>> No.12380114

>>12380099
Fuck the girly mech. I need men sporting respirators.

>> No.12380117

>>12380104

>> No.12380131

>>12380104
Bad anon. Bad. Very bad.

>> No.12380132

>>12380114
I am incapable of disagreeing.

>> No.12380153

>>12380104

>> No.12380154

>>12380132
Aw yeah.

Let's man this girly thread up a little.

>> No.12380163

>>12370120
>>12370120
>>12370120
>>12370120
>>12370120
OP
GO TO ASIAN SUPER MARKET
GET BIG ASS BAG OF RICE
GET BAG OF LENTILS
PROFIT

>> No.12380166

>> No.12380167

>> No.12380176

>>12380154
>>12380132
>>12380114
>I need men sporting respirators.
Pfff. You girls are so gay.

>> No.12380185

>>12380176
I love a man with a good set of augmentics on him.

>> No.12380192

>>12380166
Rhodes, where do you find all these awesome techpriest pictures?

>> No.12380198

>>12380114
>>12380132
>>12380176
This just in: Women want robots.

>> No.12380202

So I hear Commander Rhodes is a lady.

That's pretty neat.

>> No.12380203

>>12380192
I've a pet drawfag, you see.

Actually, I just trawl threads relentlessly. And I used to be really on drawfags for techpriest pictures. And I actually do have a drawfag for a friend (the guy who did 'CUDDLES', the one with the techpriest railing the psyker, and a couple others) who happens to be as big a cogfag as I am.

But it's mostly just saving everything. I'm no Collector, but I know what I like.

>> No.12380206

>>12380198
Chicks dig giant robots.

>> No.12380210

>>12380206
That show was fucking awful. You should be ashamed.

>> No.12380213

>>12380203
Man, I'd love a zip of your file.

>> No.12380218

>>12380213
Folder. Zip of your folder.

>> No.12380219

>>12380210
You sir, can suck my balls.

>> No.12380223

>>12380210
Fuck you and all you stand for. I hope you die.

>> No.12380225

>>12380213
>>12380218
ok

>> No.12380238

The thing I love about you guys is that, with this being 4chan, I entered the thread expecting a bunch of harsh replies, taunting the OP for food stamps (which I'm not saying anything about, my family was on welfare for a bit as a kid).

Instead, I find a thread full of on-topic replies and suggestions on how to manage with $25 for the foreseeable future.

Jesus Christ, I love you guys.

>> No.12380242

>>12380213
I... I've been on 4chan too long...
I see the sexual innuendo in EVERYTHING!

>> No.12380281

>>12380225
Saweeet.

>> No.12380284

>>12380242
The enginseer sidled up to his crush, all fumbling mechadendrites and awkward datacodes, relishing the chance to be so close to her while simultaneously terrified of fucking it all up.

She was so smart- so capable! She had beautiful augments and her skin wasn't sloughing off too badly. And she thought he was cute! That had sent the newly-minted Enginseer over the moon, and got him to ask her out. Now they were at the good part, the part where he had to be so careful, so- he sucked in a deep breath, to steady his nerves, letting a catechism rattle his brain into order.

He leaned in, twining a data-dendrite with the cable-cords of her hair, and asked, after a million rephrasings and small prayers for smooth words-

"Are you ready? Do you wanna share files? I've a .zip, if you want."

>> No.12380288

Lllllllllllllllladies.

>> No.12380299

>>12379840
>>12378283
I don't suppose you folks know where I might be able to acquire it?

>> No.12380300

>>12380284
Good god... the Collector's been fucking all of us for YEARS!

>> No.12380318

>>12380288
That's a False Man of Nomen Rhys.

GET OUT OF HERE, HERETEK.

>> No.12380328

>>12370145
> discard spices
You mean save spices and put them in your next pasta dish, right? Seriously, jazz up your buttered noodles and parmesan with a pack of Shrimp Ramen flavor. OM NOM NOM.

>> No.12380343

>>12380300
He's been nothing but a loving, tender gentleman-bird-god.

>> No.12380364

>>12380343
Oh sure, we may LIKE it, but he still has!

>> No.12380376

> I'm hungry, very little in the fridge. Also, despite being paid today, I only have $25 after bills. My food stamps get in tomorrow.

Don't waste that money on food. You can't buy Gas, Toilet Paper, Shampoo, etc. with Food Stamps in most places.

Just go hungry tonight, and tomorrow, when you get your food stamps, invest in cheap ingredients that can be used to make bigger, better things.

Eggs, Flour, and Baking Powder are my absolute basics, because with those, you can make delicious Homemade Noodles, or Dumplings. Add a few other things, and you can make Bread, Flatbread/Pitas, Corn Bread, etc.

After you get that, I would highly suggest investing in powdered Beef Soup Base, Sriracha, Soy Sauce, and fresh vegetables. Meat, contrary to popular belief, is not required in every meal. It can be substituted with flavorful broths and sauces, easily, as long as you know how to make them. If you DO get meat, get versatile things, like large roasts, or chicken breasts, and use only a bit at a time;

With Roasts, I like to, surprisingly, roast them until they're falling apart tender, then shred it, and throw bits of meat into whatever I'm making that could use it. Ramen is a great example of this.

>> No.12380391

>>12380376
/tg/: now featuring /ck/

>> No.12380396

>>12380376
I must suggest a crockpot because that shit is easymode and tastes delicious. It's virtually impossible to fuck up crockpot cooking.

I'm still eating gumbo from four days ago and it is so delicious fuck I love cooking.

>> No.12380409

3 minutes and then TECHPRIESTS

TECHPRIESTS EVERYWHERE

>> No.12380417

>>12380396

I won't say Crock Pots aren't great, but they're not exactly needed. Any good, bake-able pan works just as well, though you don't want to leave the house with it going. I would never get any pan without a heavy bottom, decently thick sides, and no plastic, silicone, or wooden handles; All metal, that way you can throw it in the oven and totally not give a single fuck, because nothing will melt or burn on it.

>> No.12380435

>>12380417
The advantage for me is that it is borderline impossible to burn shit in one if you have the lid on and you're not functionally retarded. I can get even the least cooking-inclined in my family to cook GOOD food with one.

And I can leave it on when I'm at work/cook things overnight. I'm fucking lazy, I ain't got time to worry about boiling a chicken for something that evening. Fuck that, I'ma cook it all day long/the night before.

>> No.12380438

>>12380417
>>12380396


What a crock.

>> No.12380441

http://rapidshare.com/files/423972986/All_Techpriests__All_The_Time.zip

TECHPRIEST TIME.

>> No.12380474

>>12380441
Aww yeah.

>> No.12380482

>>12380474
I live to spread the cogfag..giness? I think?

>> No.12380564

>> No.12380681

>> No.12380698

>>12380681
Picture related, it's a machine spirit.

>> No.12380717

>>12380698
OH GOD!
What prayers do I have to say to keep that little FUCK away from me?

>> No.12380739

>>12380717
Just bore your golf buddies about how great springs are.

>> No.12380747

RED DWARF REFERENCE

>> No.12380795

>>12370209
Jack some extra ingredients from any handy community fridge, and combine with available items for a tasty meal. Or you could just jack whatever you find in the community fridge that looks good.

(If you don't have a fridge in a communal kitchenette, go to the local Supermarket, and get a Sandwich, (or whatever) a tasty snack like Gardettos or whatever you like, and a nice beverage (Personally, under the circumstances I would get a Guinness or other nice, high quality beer, but that's me. If you can't buy booze, just get whatever fancy Soda strikes your fancy. All that will be under 25$, easy. Hell, you could probably buy enough ready made food, snacks, and beverages for the entire weekend on 25$ if you shopped smart.)

>> No.12380809

>>12380739
...yeah, I just went and watched the short because of that.

>> No.12381561

>>12380082
>>12380082

Is this Dark Mechanium? I see Chaos symbols and well...more fucked up than usual for the AdMech

>> No.12381621

>>12378120
Part two one Blaster Fiasco. Named affectionately by /tg/.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Onezerozeroonezerooneechszeroechsoneonezerozerozeroechsechsonezeroone...." The soft drone of three words being intoned in a high, sweet voice wafted through the darkened chamber. Weird green or yellow light shone from tubes of liquid, while the red glow of laser light shone in other places. Only in one area was there any pure white light, and that illumined black metal and pale flesh. Soft, steady breathing mixed with the strange droning incantation, and the soft whirring of servomotors was the only other sound.

"....oneechsechszerozerooneechszerozerozerozero." The soft chant ended with the sharp snap of electrical connections and the tang of ozone. "There isn't that better?" The cheery voice seemed terribly out of place in the mechanized nightmare of her workshop.

"Yyyeeeessss," came the low, soft moan. Slowly the black armor rose, and the sound of breathing faded, to be replaced by the sound of silence. "Thhhannnk yeeeeww..."

The thick drawl was met with a jaunty response of, "Never you mind, it was a pleasure! We'll keep you moving for decades, maybe even centuries!" The constant, minor augmentations could maintain the woman's body and health, but her mind would forever be a fractured and delicate flower of youth.

>> No.12381632

>>12381621
One the other hand, the plump, cheerful girl who had once invaded the home of a fearsome bounty hunter - and kissed his clone-daughter - had grown in ways both beautiful and terrifying. Her hair was now long and shone coppery, though two lengths still jutted from either side of her head, tied by incongruous ribbons; her right eye no longer monocle covered but truly a lens of emerald green. One of her legs had gone the way of her arm, and both were now mechanized and strangely elegant homage to the power of the machine. The red cloak remained, though longer and hiding the more mysterious and complex back-equipment she possessed; her white blouse came down to her shapely thigh and was belted with a girdle of numerous tools and devices.

The dark eyes which observed this slipped over the strangely appealing form of the transhumanist lingered over the soft, pale skin of her leg, and the dark, twisted limb of metal that matched it. There was a strange beauty in it all, and the olive skinned teenlicked her lips, recalling strange, faintly electrical kisses form long ago.

The servodrone, more complex and slightly more threatening than it once had been beeped softly, calling its mistress' attention to the silent intruder. Turning, the technician pale lips broke into a warm smile. "Boba!" She rose eagerly as her tall, gruesome companion gazed at Boba Fett with a faint, almost shy smile twisted by her scarred face.
Boba had grown from the slightly plump, dangerous, stoic girl she had been into a lithe, svelte, dangerous, stoic girl in her early teens. She knew her exact age - her decanter was still in her ship, a souvenir keepsake that the ashes of her father were sealed into - but she never bothered to keep track of it.

>> No.12381641

>>12381632
Her cheeks heated as the other girl slowly glided towards her. Her hand twitched a little, a telltale response she had not quite broken herself of. She did not know why this girl, of all the people she ever dealt with - or had dealt with - made her feel so strange. "I need something from you." She almost felt uncomfortable asking this strange transhumanist girl for anything. Her dark eyes rose and she looked at the delicate face with its semi-permanent smile and felt her body heating even further. "I can pay."

"Well, it depends on what you need. There are some things money can't buy." The grin did nothing to assuage Boba's trepidation and she was sure she was missing some vital element in this conversation. "Evesor, go ahead and make some tea for our friend." Boba started to refuse but her hand was firmly taken and she was half-led, half-dragged between the strange, twisted shadows of the machinery to a small cubby where low benches and several cushions were. The strange assassin slowly made her way to a different section, deliberating over the simple cooking equipment, and casually swatting the skull-like servodrone into the wall when it beeped at her too often.
The young Mandalorian followed as best as she was able to without injuring herself or pulling away from the soft, surprisingly smooth hand in hers. She found herself gently pushed onto one of the curved pads that served as a bench, while the odd girl sat cross legged on a cushion. Boba glanced down; she couldn't help it.

>> No.12381657

FUCK YES BLASTER FIASCO!

>> No.12381658

>>12381641
The girl was not only not wearing pants, but hadn't deigned to bother with anything else under the too-short tunic. Unlike the last time she'd seen the other girl's nether regions, a fine wisp of coppery down rested over the clean line of her sex and the olive skinned girl's cheeks burned hot. An answering heat bloomed in another place and she dragged her eyes up, trying to focus her attention. The girl was watching her, amusement dancing in her hazel eye.

"I wouldn't sell that to you," she mentioned casually. Boba stared at the girl, trying to fathom what she meant.

"I need a droid built, with an AI designed for hunting and killing. I need it to be completely autonomous, but dedicated to me." She glanced up at Evesor as the heavily armored woman leaned over, tongue between teeth as she struggled not to spill or crush the delicate cup in her clawed hand. Taking the proffered cup she turned back to the transhumanist girl, who was looking over her in a manner she found distinctly unnerving. "I will pay whatever it takes."

The girl leaned forward, her small, firm breasts pushing against the light silk of her blouse and creating a pair of small points as her nipples hardened, half in response to the sensation and half in response to the Mandalorian's request. "You want me to make a fully autonomous AI assassin droid!?" Her heart raced and she licked her lips, an action which caused the dark haired girl to stare. "For you!?" Boba looked confused and nodded.

"Yes! Oh, YEESS!!!" the girl exploded from where she sat and rushed at Boba.

>> No.12381669

>>12381658
Once again the girl was cross-eyed, looking at the muzzle of the blaster pressed against her forehead, her cloak settling over her shoulders as she knelt between Boba Fett's legs. She ran her tongue slowly across her lips, and said in a husky voice, "You know, I really like that gun."

Something popped inside Boba Fett's head.

She stared at the girl and swallowed slowly. The technician whispered in a sultry sort of voice, "Are you going to pull the trigger?" The soft beep of the servodrone couldn't pull Boba's attention from the other girl; even the soft sniffle of the very worried looking Evesor didn't call Boba's eyes from that wicked, lustful smile.
Boba Fett's finger remained on the trigger, the soft hum of the small, deadly weapon the only sound between the two girls. Slowly the gun was lowered, but the tip of the barrel traced a line between the mismatched eyes and along one side of the dainty nose. It continued down, and the girl leaned forward, making Boba draw breath in a quick gasp as she ran her tongue along the barrel of the weapon in a manner that Boba Fett could not name, but only instinctively understood was erotic. The gun then continued, tracing the soft throat and the shimmer of white silk between the girl's breasts. Her nipples were sharp points under the blouse and Boba swallowed heavily.

>> No.12381673

>>12381669
"Go on," whispered the girl, urging the Mandalorian to continue. The olive skinned girl obeyed, slowly lowering the weapon further, catching momentarily on the girl's navel, where something hard and rounded sat. Boba Fett glanced down, seeing a shimmering ruby light shining from under the girl's blouse. She struggled with the thought and then discarded it, her memory recalling the sight of that delicate shell pink flesh between pale cream, and more recently a wisp of coppery flame. She closed her eyes and took a shaky breath. "No, don't stop, Boba. Don't stop." Her eyes opened and she blinked several time, the girl's gaze upon hers unnerving in its intensity. "I want to feel your metal between my legs."

Boba's gun continued to fall along her soft blouse.
The other girl's eye closed, though her mechanized orb took on a brilliant emerald glow, as Boba Fett slipped the gun over her tool belt and along the subtle curve of her belly.

Boba Fett forced herself to start breathing again, realizing she'd stopped only when her vision had begun to grey out. Sparks flew along the edges of her vision, while the mechanist rose a little, her legs spread slightly, offering herself to the warrior.

The gun slowly dipped between the girl's legs, and then lower, only to slide back up along warm flesh and cool metal, tracing the space between flesh and blood, oil and ceramisteel. Boba hesitated then slowly brought the barrel of the gun up, and pressed it along the line of the other girl's sex, pressed the hard curve into the soft, moist place where the transhumanist remained fully flesh.

>> No.12381682

>>12381669
NOW I remember why it was called the Blaster Fiasco! I mean, I kinda remembered, but it just clicked again.

>> No.12381683

>>12381673
"Oneoneoneoneoneoneoneoneone...." murmured the girl softly, her hips twisting as she rubbed her sex along the cool barrel of the killer's weapon. Boba stared at the technician, her mind honed for destruction and only vaguely aware of intimacies beyond her father's occasional predation, hardly able to contemplate that this creature was receiving as much pleasure as she appeared to be receiving from this....Boba didn't even know what to call it. She slipped the barrel of the gun higher, pressing it against the firm little nub of flesh she knew would be there. Her reward was a soft, nearly inaudible sigh of multiple ones, zeros, and x's.
The Evesor watched with an incongruous look of worry and discomfiture as the young Mandalorian began to move the pistol between her keeper’s legs, stroking the cool metal along the hot flesh only barely hidden by the white blouse. The servodrone orbited the twain slowly, its eyes glowing red and a tiny green light flashing over one of the other lenses that poked from its chassis.

The technician slowly moved her hips back and forth, stroking herself on the hard metal that rested between her legs, eye opening to look at the confused, blushing visage of the warrior who sat before her, legs spread. Her armor - not the Mandalorian armor that she would one day be able to fit into but a sleek, dark suit of very fine make nonetheless - hid the more interesting signs of her arousal, but her flushed cheeks and shallow, panting breaths told the transhuman technophile everything she needed to know. "More please," she whispered to Boba softly, rising up a little more.

>> No.12381698

>>12381683
Boba stared at the girl in disbelief, but slowly moved the gun down, and angled it....her finger still on the trigger. She probed, carefully but firmly, eliciting tiny gaps and moans form her strange part-machine admirer. She found what she wanted and then pushed, inserting the barrel of her blaster into the girl, and was rewarded with a sharp, intense cry of delight. Boba bit her lip, and then leaned forward, and nearly blasted the girl in half when her head was grabbed and a forceful, desperate kiss was inflicted on her. She involuntarily shoved, pushing even more of the gun into the girl, pressing the external hardware of the weapon into the soft, delicate pink flesh of the transhumanist's sex, who immediately cried out into the kiss, her body shuddering as she climaxed under the weird assault.
Boba Fett slowly pulled the barrel of her blaster from the girl's sex, sliding it up to caress her clitoris with it. The girl shuddered, releasing Boba from the mad kiss, and fell back, on her knees, supporting herself with both hands and gazing up at the warrior with utter adoration. Boba blushed even harder, her armor stifling hot despite the cooling system and she stared at the girl.

"I'll take the job," murmured the transhumanist softly, her robotic hand coming up to draw sweat soaked copper strands from her face. "It will cost you....well, it will cost you." She laughed shakily and the Evesor knelt, gathering the girl into its possibly deadly and yet gentle and loving arms. The servodrone beeped and floated nearby, the green light blinking steadily now. "I'll have something for you....probably in the next month or so. I'll expect you back then, m'kay?"

>> No.12381708

>>12381698
Boba Fett stood uncomfortably, her hand clenched and her blaster still out. "All right." She stiffly walked from the cluttered chamber, the languid technician watching her all the way. When the door slid shut the transhuman grabbed the servodrone and demanded in near hysterics, "PLEASE tell me you got all of that!!! Say you did, you piece of junk!!!" She shook the squeaking skull-bot until it chirruped and then she sat back down, looking towards the ceiling. "Oh, thank the Machine, you stupid drone....if you hadn't gotten that..."
Boba Fett leaned against the door, utterly drained. She had no idea what had just happened except that it was possibly obscene and definitely not something she wanted to discuss with anyone, even had she someone to discuss it with. She blinked and lifted her blaster, looking at the still wet barrel. She'd have to clean it entirely when she got back to the Slave 1.

A thought caught at her, and she hesitated....then stuck out her tongue and licked the slick, gleaming barrel, tasting the other girl on it. Ears burning, nipples aching and feeling even emptier than she had before she'd walked into the machinists lair, she slowly made her way to her ship, wondering what the hell was wrong with her.

~End Part Two~

>> No.12381720

>>12381708
I honestly don;t remember, was there a part 3?

>> No.12381778

>>12381720
I guess not?

>> No.12381782

>>12381720
last part, part 3.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boba Fett stood at the door of the transhumanist's lair, hands slowly clenching and unclenching in the tight leather gloves. While she was not wearing armor this time she was as well armed as always; she still felt naked, exposed. The word 'vulnerable' had never existed in her personal vocabulary, and the concept would have been alien to her in any case. In the month that had passed she'd managed to make a name for herself already, with five more successful captures and four partially successful captures. Having to work through an intermediary was becoming tedious, which brought her to the reason she was here. While the Hutts respected her skills and ambitions, more respectable agents and authorities had trouble coping with the idea that a girl her age was an effective warrior.
It spoke well of her father's training that she hadn't killed any of them yet.

Taking a deep breath she reached for the glass panel covering the entry sensors and saw reflected in it the dark shadow behind her. The slap of leather on plastic and metal and the sound of metal sliding free of the krayt hide holster was matched by the hiss of overexerted servos and the parting of air as black armor moved. Slapped from her hand Boba's E-7 blaster - a full sized one - slammed into the wall. A grinning skull gazed at her with optic lens eyes and the massive talons of Evesor's other hand flexed, as the smaller blaster that had been strapped to Boba's left wrist was pressed against the weaker armor just under the large woman's chin.

"Evesor! You stop that right this instant!" The sharp command barked from the comm panel next to the door. "Evesooor..."

>> No.12381784

>>12381782
OH FUCK YES I WAS WRONG!

>> No.12381790

>>12381782
The warning in the voice made the woman slowly lower her talon-equipped left hand and moaned softly, "Soooorrrryyyy," in her slightly masculine, unnaturally deep voice. Boba only lowered the weapon after the woman had put both hands behind her back and scuffed the floor with a decidedly heavy clanging noise. Keeping her eyes on Evesor she picked up her blaster and then sighed. It was quite badly scarred after the woman had swatted it out of Boba's aching hand. Flexing her wrist she decided it was only sprained.

The door opened and the sinister skull servodrone floated out, beeping pleasantly and then floating higher to scold the recalcitrant Evesor. Boba turned and walked inside, and heard the drone complaining at its mistress' strange companion. The fact that she did not hear Evesor walk in with her made her nervous, but her heart was not racing because of that. She was quite aware of the reason her heart was racing, though she would have been hard pressed to explain WHY it was racing.

The reason was lying on a set of cushions in the small, well lit space past the largely dark and much cluttered workspace of the chamber. Red cloth covered her body but the lump along her back and the distinct over-muscled appearance of her right leg and right arm in comparison to the slender, delicate curves of her left leg and left arm spoke volumes about what she was - or rather was not -wearing under it. A swift cadence of "oneonezerozeroechsonezeroechs" in varying permutations flowed in the high, sweet voice of the transhumanist girl as she carefully ran glowing rods of glass and laser-scanned the positronic matrix that floated in front of her.

>> No.12381796

>>12381790
Boba paused, staring at the strange curves and shapes under the soft red cloak, and some of the not so strange curves, such as the ones where metal flowed into pure flesh and became a softly rounded derriere. She forced her eyes higher, and saw the extended waldoes of the girl's back-unit carefully moving over the cube of crystal and metal, adding finishing touches. The skull like drone beeped as it passed her and Boba followed it slowly. The incantation ceased and the girl turned over, smiling up at Boba Fett with her coppery hair spilling over her shimmering white blouse.

All sorts of critters ran amok in Boba's belly; if she swallowed a mynock live she couldn't have gotten rid of them all. She tugged at the hem of her sleek black tunic and looked down at the girl with eyes black and steady, though not quite incurious. "Is it finished?" She forced herself not to look past the shapely and the shaped thigh to the gap between them, sure she knew what she would - and wouldn't - see.

Emerald light flickered over her body and she tensed, the scan nothing new, despite the fact that it was the machined right eye of the delicate technician that was scanning her rather than a droid or a simple AI unit. She held still for it, and the transhumanist tucked her tools away in her belt without looking down, savoring the bounty huntress' lack of armor. She supported herself on one of the waldoes that extended from her back-unit, the other plucking the cube from the anti-grav platform she had been lying in front of.

>> No.12381799

>>12381796
Sitting up, her nipples delicate points under the loose white blouse, the technician dropped the cube into her flesh hand. "Yep! This is the last bit right here!" She pulled her legs up, and Boba's eyes flicked down, registering the fact that yes, she was once again not wearing panties, and yes, she was definitely a girl as the technician got off of the cushions. When the Mandalorian looked back up, her cheeks burned as the transhumanist smiled at her knowingly. "In a bit."

Taken aback, Boba almost didn't follow the girl into the darkness past the sitting area. The gentle push from behind her set her nerves on edge and she pulled away from the Evesor, who slowly complained, "Goooo waaaaan!" in a plaintive voice. Glancing back she saw that the much larger woman couldn't move past her easily and she shook her head, wondering what had happened to wreck the assassin's mind in such bizarre manners. The servodrone beeped at her as it floated past her head and she walked after it into the darkness, towards yellow and green lit shadows.

There she discovered the girl kneeling before a tall, silvery-black machine, an android seven feet tall and slender, with wiry looking limbs - literally - and a cylindrical head. "Inteligencia Gravis, number 75. Praise the Machine, he will serve you well." The words sent chills down Boba's spine and she reached out, running her leather-clad fingers along the smooth ceramisteel body.

>> No.12381806

>>12381799
Reverently the girl lifted her hands and set the cube in the open panel of the android's body, and the cube immediately lit up, as did the lenses of the droid's eyes and along other parts of its body. It gave off a garbled series of electronic noises and the young transhumanist responded in kind, pure droid speech; almost everyone understood it, few people could speak it. It greeted Boba Fett and called her mistress. "It is perfect," said the Mandalorian softly, and the girl kneeling in front of her craned her head back, looking up at her.

"Yes, he is. He'll perform in every way you need him to." The girl spoke again and the droid turned itself off, only a single telltale glowing softly. Going to her hands and knees she pivoted and turned to face Boba, whose cheeks colored and ears began to burn. She suspected what was coming, and her suspicious proved correct as the girl's soft hand and her cybernetic one slowly slipped up the tight leather encasing her thighs. "It's time for you to pay the cost." Boba's heart raced and she swallowed heavily.

The waldoes extended from the back of the transhuman's back slowly, pushing off the red cloak. Then the girl used the waldoes to detach the backpack from herself, Evesor leaning over to take it up and carry it away. The servodrone beeped softly, watching its mistress and her patron. The low back of her blouse revealed smooth skin spaced with connection ports and occasional swaths of machine-covered skin flush with her own flesh. She looked up at Boba Fett with mismatched eyes. "By the Emperor you're beautiful," she murmured softly, and her hands slipped around Boba so she could press her cheek to the smooth leather and soft black silk Boba wore.

>> No.12381817

Yeah... I'm here for the techpriests, not the lesbians...totally not here for THOSE...
Keep going.

>> No.12381820

>>12381806
Heart racing madly, the young Mandalorian shuddered. She suspected she knew what would finally force the situation this girl had slowly been pushing toward for....it might have been years. She reached up and pulled out the tiny datacrystal with the winged skull motif glowing within it. "I want you to fix my father's armor," she said in her rough voice. Her dark eyes gazed uncertainly into the young transhumanist's eyes as the shocked girl stared up at her. "The helmet was....removed by a lightsabre. The connections are cut clean but..." The damage a lightsabre caused meant an entire inch of material and circuitry was gone between helmet and torso. "I do not trust anyone but you to do it right."

Gripping the datacrystal the girl who would one day grow up to be the most infamous bounty hunter in the Empire gazed at the hazel and emerald eyes of the stranger who had barged into her life and brought nothing but confusion with her. Tears began to glisten in the girl’s human eye and she rose, pressing her body to Boba's. Boba's arms slipped away and she let the girl hug her, embarrassed and hesitant. Slowly Boba's arms wrapped about the girl and as she whispered dozens of thank you's, bless the machine, and for the love of the Emperor.

Then warm, soft lips were pressed to hers, and she gallantly attempted to return the kiss. Patiently the transhuman showed Boba what she needed to know, by the example of kissing her, slowly, deeply. The warm, sleek body rubbed against her own, the metal of the young girl's arm and leg cooling the tight leather and soft black silk. The taste of her mouth was still just as electric as it had been the times she had been kissed before, but there was something new to the kiss, a softness she was not used to. Boba felt the emptiness inside start to fill, warm heat blooming deeper in her body rather than just along her skin.

>> No.12381825

Damn, I left this thread open and went elsewhere to fap. I can't really fap again so soon (and kind of don't want to) but this stuff is good.

>> No.12381838

>>12381820
When the kiss was finally broken, Boba was gasping softly, her head spinning. The soft clatter of the transhuman's tool belt falling to the floor was accompanied by the soft rustle of silk; the girl was fully naked before Boba Fett in all her machine-born glory. Pale nipples, coral pink, jutted from small, firm breasts, and the copper lengths of her hair drifted along pale skin and gleaming black metal. Boba's hands clenched and she swallowed, looking down the girl's body to see the red gem-like telltale in her navel, the silvery wires that extended from it sinking into the soft flesh and leading down to the wisp of flaming hair above the bare slit of the girl's sex. Her hips were different, metal starting along her left leg up high, and merging with flesh just below the line of her groin. Likewise her shoulders differed, gleaming black ceramisteel claiming the lines of collarbone and just above the smooth breast along the right side of her body, becoming curvaceous, sculpted muscle and sinew.

The girl reached forward and slowly undid the Mandalorian's belt, loosing her guns from her hips and then moving closer, unbuttoning the fly slowly, with deliberate care. A beatific smile graced the soft, warm lips and Boba caught herself staring at the girl's lovely face. Slowly she toed off her boots in anticipation of having to step out of her pants. She wasn't sure she could do this, but she had strong doubts that the other girl would let her falter much. As she was slowly stripped, she glanced back, noting Evesor was....well, talking was close enough....communicating with the servodrone, and suitably distracted. Then she turned to see the girl looking at her, lips mere inches away. "Lift your arms."

>> No.12381845

>>12381838
Boba's first instinct was to knee the girl in the groin and then follow up with a downward strike that would have left the girl sprawling and possibly broken. The telltale tremble in her arms and the tensing of her shoulders was less of a giveaway than she'd been prone to even a mere month before, but the girl smiled. "Should I give you a gun?" Boba shook her head, taking the question at face value rather than as an irony. Slowly she lifted her arms and let the technician lay her bare.

Svelte, Boba was not yet as muscular as one day she would be, but she was still a finely tuned machine in her own right. There were no scars evident on her olive skin, and the fine wisps of darkness above her sex were as delicate and spare as her frame. Her nipples were slightly darker, and tight and almost painful, and then covered by warm flesh on one side and cool, sleek metal on the other. Boba closed her eyes, swallowing heavily as the other girl's lips pressed against her lips, the quickly throbbing pulse along her throat, the hollow below that. The hands kneaded gently, making her legs weak in some mysterious way.

Though the concept of vulnerability was alien to the young Mandalorian, the sensation of being bereft of weapon and armor was unpleasant. Yet the smooth, warm skin, the cool, ungiving ceramisteel, and the hot, moist kisses began to distract. Twitching, Boba's hands kept wanting to grab, break, maneuver. But when warm heat engulfed her breast she cried out and fell forward into the other girl, nearly taking them both to the ground. The transhuman looked up at the shaking warrior. "You know, if you’re that sensitive we really need to be on the cushions."

>> No.12381860

>>12381845
Unwilling - perhaps unable - to speak, Boba nodded and slowly gathered her wits. She turned and walked slowly to the cushions, but before she could sit down she was embraced from behind, flesh and metal encircling her body, warm skin sliding up to caress her breasts again, but hard metallic fingers sliding down. She gasped and was torn, instinct warring with training as the hard metal slipped between her legs, sliding into the gap there and gently pressing into the warm slit of her sex. Firm teeth gently bit at her ear and then soft, warm licks and mouthings persisted. The strange feel of metal and flesh pressed along her legs, her back, her buttocks was making her head spin. She no longer knew what was going on, except in the vague sense of dreamlike shock.

Slowly she was taken to her knees, her legs spreading wide to offer the hand between her legs better access to that which it sought. Her breath hitched and she closed her eyes, her hands reaching back, grasping, sliding along warm flesh and unforgiving metal. The mouth nibbling at her ear pulled away and whispered a soft susurration of 'oneoneoneoneoneone'; then it was gently pressed to her own lips and she tilted her head back, her hips rocking as the metallic fingers slipped deeper inside her, stroked the soft heat of her body. The transhuman rubbed her soft breasts against the heat of the other girl's back, gently pleasured her as another had done so roughly and cruelly many years before.

>> No.12381861

/tg/ Shopping, pictures, and porn!

>> No.12381867

>>12381860
When Boba climaxed it was sudden and violent, and she lost control in ways she'd never imagine she could. The lovely transhuman did not laugh, did not condemn, only gently continued her slow, hot and cold pleasuring. Only when Boba whimpered softly and started to struggle did she stop. The girl slipped from behind Boba to lay her safely aside and then straddled her slowly, warm flesh and cool metal against the burning body of the Mandalorian girl. Her kiss was returned, eagerly if not expertly, and the strong hands came up to lightly crush, rub her breasts. She laughed softly and then crawled down, eliciting a confused look form Boba Fett. Her mouth moved over small, firm breasts and flat, hard belly, and then lower, along soft, muscular thighs.

Boba stared as the girl lay between her legs, metal and fire and milk smiling up at her. Then the girl's mouth descended and a sensation so intense seared through every nerve ending she had that Boba cried out and jerked away. The girl stared at her, mirroring Boba's own many times displayed shock and confusion at the transhuman's strange words and actions. Boba's breaths came quick and unsteady and the girl's flesh and blood fingers traced the soft, wet line between Boba's legs. "I won't bite, really!" Boba stared at the girl, and then slowly, very slowly lay back down. Her heart felt about ready to burst; she watched the girl closely, as the young transhuman slowly spread her open with warm flesh and cool metal, then began to apply her tongue and lips to the heat there.

>> No.12381869

>>12381860
>'oneoneoneoneoneone'
I was amused.

>> No.12381877

>>12381867
It was wet heat against wet heat, and intimate in a way nothing in her life had been. The girl slowly devoured the musky warmth of Boba's sex; Boba's hands gripped the cushions, her warrior's mind struggling between pleasure and the alien sensation of intimacy. The gentle affections slowly built the fires that had overwhelmed the emptiness within Boba and she started to relax, unable to keep a vigil against what her body and mind were trained to feel as a threat and a danger. The transhuman's tongue dipped deeply, exploring her more intimately and gently than she'd ever been explored in her life; sometimes there would be bolts of hot fire or electricity, and they started to collide inside her, slowly becoming a furnace.

When she climaxed again, the pleasure seemed to go on forever, and she struggled in vain against the warm flesh and cool metal of her admirer's body. When she stopped struggling, the warm and cold body slid up along hers, delivering warm caresses and loving kisses, until she curled into the other girl, whimpering softly and twitching, mind scattered and spirit blasted.

>> No.12381886

>>12381877
She remained that way for some hours, curled against the other girl, until finally she spoke. "What will the armor cost me?" The technician laughed softly and blushed.

"Something like that, except on your part."

It took the Mandalorian some time to process the idea. "I....don't know how...."

"I'll teach you. It will be easy. I'll do anything for you." The hazel and emerald eyes gazed into the darkness of the warrior's eyes. A long silence lay between them before the bounty hunter murmured a response.

"All right."

She didn't feel quite so empty any longer.

~End~

No more. Look up Xiombarg's Storyteller on /rs/ if you want more, but there's some sick shit mixed in with the good stuff.

>> No.12381895

>>12381886
>implying sick shit isn't also good stuff

>> No.12381896

>>12381845
>>12381860
>>12381867
>>12381877
>>12381886
trousertent.jpg

>> No.12381897

>>12381886
>Look up Xiombarg's Storyteller on /rs/ if you want more, but there's some sick shit mixed in with the good stuff.
...YEAAAH... I'm familiar with Xiombarg's... The good stuff is great though.

>> No.12381915

This thread... This thread is a good thread.
I'd never read the third part, though I was there for the first 2.

>> No.12381938

Bump for... well.. lesbians.

>> No.12382223

One last bump before bed so everyone can enjoy.

>> No.12382257

Go get tuna. Lots of it. And rice. And dry beans. You are poor. Eat like it and you will have money for books and stuff

>> No.12382276

>>12382257

Rice + Beef and chicken boullione = meals for weeks.

Not only that, but you'll probably lose weight, if you only have a serving at a time like you're supposed to.

>> No.12382290

>>12381886

In before 404

Fapfics are against the rules now, remember? :(

>> No.12382309

>>12382290
Your two best expensive investments are spices and cooking oil.

Once you have those to, pasta and potatoes become much more edible because you have a multiple number of ways to prepare them and eat them and you can vary the spices to get different flavors while varying cooking times and styles to get varying textures. Varying both of those will make life a little better on a poor boy's diet.

>> No.12382359

$25 could easily buy you enough frozen veggies to last a month. Fry em on a pan, add a bit of rice or meat or both and you have a lot of quite healthy food.

>> No.12385024

whatever happened to Xiombarg's Storyteller?

>> No.12385535

>>12385024
Apparently writing Viera-on-Mithra sexpornings. Which was going to be posted days ago.

>> No.12386226

>>12385024
Got herself hospitalized again. She's getting out tonight.

>> No.12386442

>>12386226
>Got herself hospitalized again.
Yeah, that's the problem with all that weird fetishy stuff.

>> No.12387590

>>12386226
>>12386442

You have to suffer if you want true glory

Which is kinda what Chaos is in a way

>> No.12387686

>>12386226
Poor storyteller- I hope she feels better

>> No.12389225

How is this still up?

>> No.12391703

>>12386442
Actually, it's a lot of what happens when you take drugs that help you breathe so well you don't know about serious lung infections until the fever spikes at 104 or higher.

>> No.12394452

>>12385535

But... porn is illegal here now

>> No.12396458

>>12394452
>>12394452
That's not enforced if it's written. Because the Mod doesn't actually read threads. Probably because he's illiterate.

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